Dispatches from the shitshow-iest shitshow ever to shit all over the White House!
Keep stalling, assholes. You're just giving Robert Mueller time to strengthen his case EVEN MORE.
Let's review that time Comey sent his famous Hillary emails letter ELEVEN DAYS BEFORE THE FUCKING ELECTION.
SHIT IS CRAZY, Y'ALL.
The howler monkeys WILL NOT STOP FUCKING HOWLING about how Robert Mueller, one of the most respected law enforcement officials in American history, IS A BIG GAY UNFAIR HILLARY LOVER.
It's probably best to let him believe the Mueller investigation is almost over.
Y'all, today's White House Press Briefing is gonna be GOOD.
Trump campaign staffer George Papadopoulos pleaded guilty to lying to the FBI. Also, admitted being moron.
How DARE Nate Silver suggest the New York Times's coverage of Hillary's emails was anything but PERFECT?
Your president is a dumb, petty crybaby of a man.
Jesus Christ, this is stupid.
And all your other late-breaking updates in the Trump-Russia investigation!
It looks like bunch of the FBI's top brass will be called to testify against Donald Trump in Robert Mueller's investigation! Uh oh!
ERRBODY ASS GETTIN' FIRED UP IN HERE!
The WEAK AND FAILING JAY SEKULOW, everyone!
You won't believe this, but 'Fox & Friends' GOT SOMETHING WRONG.