Alex Jones is a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a hypothetical gang-bang video.
Oh, so actually Michael Cohen took in another $2 million in funnymoney? HUH.
The president's lawyer takes his THE BEST WORDS on teevee!
Michael Cohen can't take this anymore, Trump calls immigrants animals, and Trump-Russia goes off the fucking rails! Your morning news brief.
This fucking guy right here!
New York Times Wonders If It MAY Have Shit Bed A Tiny On That Little Trump-Russia Story Just That One Time
Golf clap, New York Times. JUST KIDDING, FUCK YOU.
Michael Cohen Would Like This Qatari Guy To Put The Millions In The Bag Please, He’ll See That The Trump Family Gets It
We're not sure what this is. BUT IT IS NOT GOOD.
Fuck the Senate Judiciary Committee right now, for real.
Michael Cohen's got a BIG problem, it's military warehouses for kids at the border, and the #Vagenda claims another big victory. Your morning news brief.
We vote for Michael Cohen. Or Erik Prince. Or ... ooh, ooh, Devin Nunes!
This story broke our brain so it doesn't have to break yours.
Michael Cohen got a problem with the boss, the new US embassy in Jerusalem opens in bloodshed, and Trump gossips with Hannity like a couple of teenage girls.
Touch me in the morning, then just walk away. We don't have tomorrow, but we had yesterday.
Avenatti's got something new on Michael Cohen, Giuliani gets quit-fired by his law firm, and Scott Pruitt dines with an ALLEGED pedophile. Your morning news brief.
Do not come for Michael Avenatti. Especially if you are the dumbest lawyer in America.
This scandal gets stupider and weirder and stupider and weirder ...