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Sorry, ain’t no Woody Guthrie to help anymore.

Hey, remember how Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback cut taxes like crazy and the state didn’t have a free-market miracle of growth but instead went broke, and then voted for Donald Trump, who promised a great big tax cut? You’ll never guess what’s happened in Oklahoma, where the state government has been cutting taxes like crazy. Surprise! About a fifth of the state’s schools have gone to a four-day-a-week class schedule. State Police officers have a mileage limit to cut down on fuel costs, though we wouldn’t advise you to try speeding at the end of the month. The state slashed rates for Medicaid providers, so nursing homes and hospitals are shutting down. Thank god for prison overcrowding, or nobody’d have a job.

How bad has it gotten? Welp, there was this Guardian article from last August that portrays Oklahoma as a failing state, a place where out of control wildfires have to be tackled by out of state crews because the state laid off too many of own its forestry workers. Oh, yes, and one in four children is hungry. Don’t worry kids, maybe there’ll be some room-temperature irradiated milk in the government food box somewhere down the road.

Among other fun facts, we learn that Oklahoma pays its teachers less than “entry-level employees with a high school diploma” at the QuikTrip convenience store chain. And that the state’s Teacher of the Year for 2016 up and left for Texas, because, as he said, “Teaching in Oklahoma is a dysfunctional relationship.”

As NPR notes, rightwing fiscal responsibility types have made it nearly impossible to restore lost revenue after taxes get cut: Thanks to a ballot initiative passed in the 1990s, any revenue increase has to be passed by a three-quarters super-SUPER-majority in the Legislature. Impressive — tax hikes in Oklahoma require a bigger majority than the US Constitution demands to remove a president by impeachment.

The oil and gas sector — what Saint Molly Ivins, from next-door Texas, called the awl bidniss — is another source of fiscal distress: When oil was booming thanks to fracking, the state cut taxes on oil to encourage the nice awl bidnissmen to stay in Oklahoma (we can say “men” because come on, it’s Oklahoma. Awl bidnisswomen would make the harvest fail and the milk sour). But then the price of oil started slipping, and production slacked off, making state revenues — about a quarter of the revenue side of the budget — drop badly. The state has lost at least half a billion dollars a year in subsidies and tax cuts for Big Awl, which would have at least covered Oklahoma’s school-funding deficit of $220 million last year, though it wouldn’t have covered all the state’s needs. Maybe if they could fire some janitors and make poor kids’ parents sweep the halls for free to cover the costs of school lunches.

That August 2017 piece in the Guardian didn’t hold out a lot of hope that Oklahoma would solve its dysfunction; it closed with these paragraphs:

“Our situation is dire,” Oklahoma finance director Preston Doerflinger said. “To use a pretty harsh word, our revenues are difficult at best. Maybe they fall into the category of somewhat pathetic.”

Governor Mary Fallin had an answer: prayer. The governor issued an official proclamation making 13 October Oilfield Prayer Day. Christians were to gather in churches and hope for a little divine intervention targeting falling worldwide oil prices. Fallin quickly back-pedalled when it was pointed out that her proclamation only included Christians. “Prayer is good for everyone,” she reasoned.

Prayer Day came and went. The price of oil has barely budged since. Three weeks after Prayer Day, however, the earth shook. A 5.0 magnitude earthquake hit the town of Cushing, a place whose claim to fame is the “Oil Pipeline Crossroads of the World”.

Gov. Fallin appears to have had a Road to Damascus (or to Dibble) moment regarding the state’s fiscal problems, as NPR reported last week: In this year’s State of the State speech, Fallin said she’s ready to considered at least some small revenue increases, because The Children “deserve better.”

Of course, there’s that 75 percent requirement for any such tax plan, which means the state’s tiny Democratic minority will have to vote with Rs, and somehow make up for whatever number of never-ever-raise-any-taxes votes are still insisting BIGGER tax cuts are the answer. That gives Dems in the legislature some leverage to get their priorities considered — but it also makes them the Bad Guys if any budget agreement fails. Or if it passes, for that matter, since Rs will then be able to insist those nefarious Dems forced the state to back off forcing Medicaid recipients to eat actual dirt in order to keep the schools open.

And just think, Scott Pruitt is rumored to want to come back and be governor after he’s finished gutting the EPA. That ought to go great. Here’s hoping math classes can be held inside the QuikTrip.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to help US stay in bidniss.

[NPR / Guardian]

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  • kaydenpat

    Republican politics run amok.

  • ArgieBargie

    “Governor Mary Fallin had an answer: prayer. The governor issued an official proclamation making 13 October Oilfield Prayer Day.”

    Nothing Fallin like prayer.

    • GuidedAccordingly

      She chose to hold that on a Friday the 13th. No wonder it didn’t work.

  • BaconzShanz

    As a mid-Atlantic/Great Lakes/ Rust Belt/ North Easterner paying for the mistakes of other states…well Baconzgood is getting tired of it. We got great farm country here in Pennsylvania where is our free money?

    Oh that’s right we run our schools and tax fairly now. (And yes this gerrymandering we are getting a hold of now)

  • ArgieBargie

    Wait, are we saying Oklahoma isn’t able to pull itself up by its bootstraps?

    • P’jama Pahnts

      Unpossiblel!

    • willi0000000

      could have . . . until it had to eat them.

  • JohnBull

    The children deserve better? No Republican truly believes that unless the kids are still in the damn womb.

    • ArgieBargie

      As George Carlin once brilliantly put it: Republicans want live babies so they grown up to be dead soldiers.

    • Jennaratrix

      They don’t even really believe it then; “pro-life” is all about controlling the wimmins.

  • msanthropesmr

    Oklahoma. The Surrey with the lunatic fringe on top.

  • rocktonsam

    thoughts and prayers…

    • ArgieBargie

      Prayers? Yes, but I’m afraid there aren’t a whole lot of thoughts coming from Oklahoma.

  • OrG

    Oklahoma-making Mississippi and Alabama feel better about themselves.

  • TJ Barke

    It’s back to the gilded age for ‘Merica. Unfortunately the robber barons have tools of social control they could have only dreamed of back then.

    • Meccalopolis

      Let’s hope they don’t get the Pinkertons and the National Guard this time

      • TJ Barke

        Now they’ve got whatever Blackwater is going by these days.

        • Meccalopolis

          yup

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          Princertons?

        • FlownΩver

          DeVosenaries.

    • hudson

      brilliant.

  • Hobbes’ like, smart Evil Twin

    Are we done making America “great” again, yet? Can we go back to whatever it was we were before?

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      By great he meant great for t-rump, not anyone else.

  • It could be worse. You could be Benjamin Netanyahu.

    • willi0000000

      yeah . . . my heart bleeds for that sonofabitch

  • Peter Witting

    At least they still have farm subsidies!

    Good thing *that’s* not some sort of government program.

  • JohnBull

    Iowa’s doing the same thing. A bunch of legislation for morons is happening: fetal heartbeat bills, death penalty debates, tax cuts for assholes, anti-pot rhetoric, more guns everywhere, a measly 1% increase in school funding—it’s as though being boring and smelling like pigs wasn’t embarrassing enough.

  • Blackest Noobs

    listen this is a total and complete failure of white people failing other white people and taking down everyone else too.

    there’s that trickle-down fantasy they keep telling themselves but has never ever been proven, well, they proven the rubes are rubes and will fall for any bullshit that is put before them, while the 1%er white fuckers cash in.

    i would to simply say you get what you deserve but unfortunately this doesn’t just fuck over white people, it fucks over everyone.

    • Shanzgood (15 Days!)

      Jesus, dude. Would it be OK with you if it only fucked over white people?

      • Paul

        Yes it would. He is a bigot, plain and simple, according to Merriam-Webster, and should be called out for it each and every time.

        Definition of bigot
        : a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (such as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance

        • Shanzgood (15 Days!)

          I’ve seen some questionable stuff that raised my eyebrow before but this is just…wow.

          • Paul

            I call him out every time I see it and he has no answer other than more rude bigoted crap.

            Even Holly said something to him finally. Holly!!! The sweetest person on here. His reply was despicable. He has serious anger issues that need to be addressed.

            I should further add that I have always been polite and logical when challenging his bigotry, only to get totally shit on in return.

            So last time I also called him the punk that he is. Still no defense for his actions, even after that. He is capable of cogent comments and I explained that bigotry only weakens his arguments and makes him look foolish. The reply was as childish as you might imagine.

  • ManchuCandidate

    OH what a 3rd World Shithole!
    Oh what a failed state!
    I got a horrifying feeling
    The GOPers got their waaaaay!

  • BaconzShanz

    Laffur curve ain’t working? Whoda thunk?

    • ManchuCandidate

      NO ONE’S LAUGHING EXCEPT THE RICH

    • proudgrampa

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Shanzgood (15 Days!)

      Kansas is fixing Brownback’s mess. Hopefully OK will as well before manic fracking turns it into a sinkhole.

      • BaconzShanz

        Go and volunteer for that dem you like by the place you made me get my feet washed and clipped!

        Have you volunteered yet? Why aren’t volunteering now? You could walk there right now, it’s a lovely day. Why aren’t you helping deep red in Kansas turn Blue (is someone else better than Shan going to do it?) You can lick envelopes as we speak. Are you walking there? It’s not far. You can have a wonkette candidate from Kansas. You aren’t walking there right now? Are your legs broken. It will be fun…by the pedicure place..you can walk there right now…

        • FlownΩver

          Tentative NiceTime stuff from Kansas:

          Recent polling identifies the GOP goobernator candidate with the highest name recognition, but the lowest approval rating. It’s (wait for it)…

          KKKris KKKOBACH!

  • proudgrampa
  • Mavenmaven

    These guys will destroy everything just to prove their bogus “conservative” economic theology is true, this is like Fiscal Lysenkoism.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      An excellent analogy!

    • ManchuCandidate

      Like the Commies did 30 years ago.

    • C.W. St. John Nobbs

      Had to look up Lysenkoism, and yup.

      Another thing I like about this place is I learn all kinds of new stuff

  • Meccalopolis

    Let them learn their lesson

    • ((( Augustus )))

      impossible

    • rg9rts

      conservatives never learn…only deflect and blame everyone else

      • Meccalopolis

        Then they’re stupid and they’ll die

    • Crystalclear12

      You made a funny.
      Hahahaha. . .
      Oh crap, you’re serious?

  • Toomush Stability

    The “Teacher of the Year” up and left for………Texas???? How dumb is it there? I could understand if said teacher left for Minnesota, or some state that made sense to teach in, but Texas???? Even their best ain’t too smart?…

    • JohnBull

      It’s all relative. President Romney doesn’t sound so bad compared to what we got now.

      • FlownΩver

        Painful Anal Warts doesn’t sound so bad compared to what we got now.

    • Marsupial99

      There’s not many places left for teachers to go. Texas actually pays pretty well, from what I understand. (Public schools, not private/charters.)

      • Toomush Stability

        It ain’t all about the pay…

        • Arolpin

          She was already living in Oklahoma (and I assume by choice), so maybe she likes living among those less concerned with knowledge and facts, she just wants to be paid a little more to do so.

        • Marsupial99

          True enough – as the husband of a teacher, I agree. But, as she says, teaching is a 24/7 job, and if your paycheck is less than what you would make at Taco Bell, AND you have to buy your own supplies, AND parents blame you for everything, AND you’re never truly off-the-clock, sometimes it is.

          • The way I heard it, the OK teachers negotiated a four-day workweek so they can work one day a week as Walmart greeters (and similar jobs) to make ends meet.

      • Meccalopolis

        Is Texas “right to work?”

        • Marsupial99

          Yes. I don’t think there is even a teachers’ union in Texas. Go fig.

    • LadyLaz

      The big cities in Texas are actually both fairly blue and fairly nice. They also have a decent school system, a solid high tech sector.

  • James Baskin

    Don’t the federal government have some cheese they can can give these poor folks?

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    They should have prayed harder.

  • Marsupial99

    I am always amazed (not really, I guess) when I read these articles about how some legislator, governor, whatever, wishes for oil prices to skyrocket and save their asses, and seemingly no one screams “Hey Asshole! If oil prices go up, then gas goes up, and I get hit with higher driving costs!”

    I remember several years ago (43 admin) when someone (Cheney, maybe?) was saying that we NEED high oil prices, because the oil/gas company stocks will skyrocket, and you know who depends on dividends from those…: WIDOWS & ORPHANS!! Sure, every widow and orphan I run across is deeply vested in oil stock, and lives off those sweet, sweet, black gold dividends, and totally isn’t being choked by high gas prices! Isn’t it the same for you???

    • ManchuCandidate

      Those that depended on profits from gas and oil stocks were more likely to make widows and orphans… see Dick “Dick” Cheney.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Then again, I also remember the wingnuts screaming at Bamz, as the economy began to rebound and oil prices started to go up with all the new demand.

      tr;dr wingnuts just like to scream and blame everyone else for their self inflicted problems

    • I’m being choked and otherwise assaulted by the by-products of burning oil – we all are. Greater demand for oil makes things worse faster. Those wildfires that OK can’t put out themselves are partly a result of longer, hotter, droughts, a consequence for global warming.

  • rg9rts

    and the deniers will deny it till the end…who is supposed to pick up the picies of this mess??? The blue states of course…every conservatives whipping boy

  • P’jama Pahnts

    So, How’s California doin’ these days?

    • rg9rts

      better than Oklahoma or Kansas

    • ManchuCandidate

      The Sour Grapes of Wrath.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      In addition to having the 6th largest economy on the planet, we will have a projected $19 billion (yes that is a “b”) state budget surplus, thank you.

      • P’jama Pahnts

        This is one native who wished he could move back >>sniff<<

        • OrdinaryJoe

          We’ll leave a light on for you.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Oilfield Prayer Day?

    Christ, why doesn’t Fallin just wear a big ol’ sign that reads, “I am an oil company stooge.”

    • C.W. St. John Nobbs

      She doesn’t?

    • ArgieBargie

      She sucked all that oil schlong and didn’t even get the keys to the Mercedes. Not fair!

  • Very Stable Bozi

    Woody Guthrie:

    “A little song I learned upstream in prison one day.

    This land is made of mountains,
    This land is made of mud,
    This land has lots of everything
    For me and Elmer Fudd.
    This land has lots of trouser,
    This land has lots of mausers,
    And pussy cats to eat them
    when the sun goes down!”

    Let the Oklahomans eat mud!

    • msanthropesmr

      Well, who am us, anyway?

      • Very Stable Bozi

        Were one of you, I think.

        • HarryButtle

          But how can you be sure?

          • Very Stable Bozi

            Is our President named Schicklgruber?

      • therblig

        honkies, who never left the farm!

      • FlownΩver

        Don’t forget those of us from the far-flung Isles of Langerhans.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    These fools never fucking learn…

  • IMPOed
  • IdiokraticKulturKommissar

    It’s the GOP, the party that put the (lunatic) fringe on top.

  • MynameisBlarney

    So…I’m not much of a folky, but I like this guy.

    Heard this song on NPR and it damn near brought me to tears. Of rage.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbQUIWF0lys

    • proudgrampa

      Wow. I am a folky. I love this!

      • MynameisBlarney

        Share it, it needs to go viral.
        As soon as I’m not a broke ass sumbitch, I’mma throw some Ameros at this guy for a CD.

    • LadyLaz

      Love it. Saving it.

    • Aaron Wise

      He is emulating Dick Gaughan.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGWr2i1f5s0

    • Tennessee Rain Genius

      It’s beautiful and the message is wonderful. But, the US liberated Buchenwald, not Birkinau. I know. I’m such a bitch. Sorry :-(

      • Lord Jim

        Good catch. It’s both appropriate to point out the error and to declare it a nonfoul. Too much truth slippage leads to – where we are.

        • Tennessee Rain Genius

          Thank you.

      • MynameisBlarney

        You and your pesky facts!

      • doktorzoom

        “We” could also be the Allies, in which case no error.

        • FlownΩver

          It just went on vacay for a few decades. Unless His Orangeness signs an outright surrender.

    • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

      Well, that brings it home, pretty much.

  • msanthropesmr
    • weejee

      Squeezing them wrathful grapes.

  • Suddenly that 5% yield on Grand River Dam Authority municipal bonds doesn’t look so inviting.

    • Aaron Wise

      I’m willing to bet that the people at Moody’s have had a few free trips and kickbacks to keep the ratings in check.
      Trips…not to mobileoklahoma….

  • P’jama Pahnts

    Sure, why not have your entire state rely on prayer instead of actual governing, or science, or even basic math when catastrophe hits? Remember the Texas Days of Prayer for Rain?

    The drought continued to worsen for four months following the Days of Prayer. While only 15-17% of the state was undergoing exceptional drought by late April, the percentage grew to 50% a month later, and by late June, more than 70% of the state was experiencing exceptional drought conditions, a level at which it persisted until August 18, 2011

    • WotsAllThisThen

      My bad. We were praying for the drought and I may have misspoken.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I’ve been praying for draught.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Meanwhile thousands of godless northwesterners reached for their umbrellas.

  • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

    A 3/4 requirement for taxes? You might as well say “we will never ever raise taxes”.

    This is why I hate these sort of “supermajority” ballot questions or ballot questions that jigger with the legislative procedures. You get enough idiots to go along with it, you can hamstring a state for decades.

    • rg9rts

      what about the morons that put that into effect?

    • jowgajen

      The nice bit is how it takes only a simple majority of idiots to effectively irreversibly lower taxes.

  • Crystalclear12

    Don’t forget the toll roads that have more potholes than pavement.

    • rg9rts

      to stop speeders

      • Crystalclear12

        I just speed on the shoulder where it’s smooth.

        • MynameisBlarney

          The shoulder, AKA “Speed Lane”.

  • LadyLaz

    Jesus.

    Christ.

    Almighty.

  • Christopher Story

    Three men sit down to a plate of ten cookies. The first man takes nine cookies, and when the second man reached for the last one, the first man turns to the third man and says, “Hey, he’s stealing your cookie.”

    • Gosala

      absolutely stealing this

    • Lord Jim

      Important detail: the first and third men are white, the second is black.

  • Squeegee

    This is the same reason Amazon is reportedly taking a pass on Austin and other cities in Texas for its next headquarters….fiscal responsibility and the quality of education are factors for them in deciding where to move next…..in addition to social and religious tolerance and education levels of the general population.
    In Texas a state court had to issue an order forcing the state to spend more money on its schools.
    But quite frankly the Republicans hate good quality education because they want everyone to be home schooled by stay at home mothers while men work.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Educated people think. Think people ask questions. Questions require answers. Answers that are false will be question by thinking people. Those people vote Democrat. So for the Refucklicans, home school.

      • Squeegee

        That recent incident in California where the whole family of kids was being held hostage and starved / tortured shows the dark side of home schooling when it is not properly policed …. more generally home school kids are less socially apt and perform worse in college and life in general…. a lot of leading universities frown upon accepting them just like they frown upon accepting kids from for profit schools

    • WotsAllThisThen

      What Amazon – and every company competing in the future – needs most is education and infrastructure.

      • Squeegee

        Yeah it is still amazing to me that their business model works with the economies of scale and absence of retail outlets making up for the cost of distribution.

  • SadDemInTex

    It’s the Gilded Age with the Great Depression thrown in. Oklahoma will be a ghost state because there will be mass migration to places that might be less awful.

    • rg9rts

      LMAO TEXAS

    • gnomemansanisland

      The question of whether parts of Oklahoma are habitable was a serious one in the early 1930s.

      • Seek

        My husband’s Grandmother lived in Tulsa. When she passed away, it was less expensive to stop paying the taxes and let her house revert to the state than it was to hire a lawyer to deal with probate and sell it.

        I always liked what one prospective realtor called the area “little meth labs on the prairie”. The question was asked and answered – No it isn’t habitable.

    • Longstreet63

      They’ll move to blue states and then vote Republican…

      • Ms.Moon

        They can’t afford to move to blue states, or at least New York we have a housing shortage right now and white folks are gentrifying the ‘hood at a clip.

    • Cornelius Fussbudget

      And yet, they will still have as many Senators as any other state.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Meanwhile California has a $7 billion surplus being divided between a rainy day fund and paying down all that debt from the last time the GOP had any power in the state legislature.

    • Arolpin

      See, this is why LIEBURALS! can’t govern. They’re putting money into a ‘rainy day fund’ while California is suffering from another drought! The right answer is to cut all taxes and spending and pray that it all works out. It’s the opposite of Colt 45 Malt Liquor, It works NEVERY time.

  • Blackest Noobs

    O/T but pretty much on topic cuz corruption.

    no wonder Benji liked the Donald, they are basically the same shitbag, perhaps one more competent than the other but still both assholes trying to cheat everyone else.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/13/world/middleeast/netanyahu-israel-corruption.html

    • gnomemansanisland

      Keep your eye on the politicians that need enemies to rise to the top.

  • Hanaka

    I mean QuikTrip is the bomb, but pays better than what they pay the teachers? Damn.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Well you know the educati’n is gonna be thin as watered down soup.

    • Historicat

      In their defense, QuikTrip turns a profit, which is more than any of those public schools can say.

      • Hanaka

        Ah yes, profit, the real goal of educating our children.

        • Historicat

          ‘Murka!

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Now I ain’t no thinking man, but I think that Oklee-ho-muh needs to just get rid of their current government and let the cattle run it. Betcha one of Aunt Jen’s bras that they do a better job too.

    Meet yer new legggies-laters!

    https://media-cdn.tripadvisor.com/media/photo-s/02/5b/84/0a/west-fest-longhorn-cattle.jpg

  • Jack Has a Memo!!!!

    It’s not THAT bad! Why, I’m sure if they sold off all their surreys with the fringe on top, they could keep the lights on for, like, another week or two.

  • Bub, Secret Society zombie
  • OrdinaryJoe

    Secret test message from the Ayn Rand Ryan office of the Speaker. ” Let the state go broke, end their statehood, turn it back into a territory. Give most of it back to the Native Americans and let the rest turn into Puerto Rico.”

  • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

    Meanwhile, we’re back to “Don’t listen to what I said, listen to what I am saying.”

    https://twitter.com/CNN/status/963498061313044480

    • gallbladder

      More “sarcasm.”

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Did he write that joke himself? He sure don’t have Mel Brooks on his staff.

    • ryp

      Or, just don’t listen to anything I say.

    • Lord Jim

      Passive-aggressive – what does it mean?

    • FlownΩver

      Yeah, fuck this guy.

  • jodyleek

    “But then the price of oil started slipping, and production slacked off, making state revenues — about a quarter of the revenue side of the budget — drop badly.”
    I’m no expert on foreign politics, but isn’t this kind of what happened in Venezuela?
    I hope the zoos in Oklahoma have sturdy locks.

  • Resistor Radio

    Please don’t tell me that QuikTrip is owned by evil people because hand to dog, that is my favorite gas station/convenience store ever. Their Dr Pepper tastes as good as Sonic’s!

  • Jack Has a Memo!!!!

    This calls for the Divine Ms. M.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zd6Bi9AtNus

  • Longstreet63

    See this? This is what happens everywhere if the current effort to ban partisan gerrymandering fails. While the red controlled states impoverish themselves, the federal government punishes blue states, increasing their local tax burden, generating anti-tax sentiment (with the help of outside Citizens United money) until they, too, are red controlled and start on the road to collapse.
    The solution? More tax cuts, of course…

  • Crystalclear12

    Another reenactment of The Grapes of Wrath?
    Psst, Oklahoma, Kansas beat you to it.

    • Cat Cafe

      Yes, but this time we in California don’t want them. That’s how you end up with Dana Rohrabacher.

      • FlemmishSpy

        You’ll need calves the size of cantaloupes to get in.

    • FlownΩver

      At least we (Kansastanians) figured it out before we went Full Wile E over the cliff.

      • Crystalclear12

        Don’t lie, you have an Acme catalog by the phone, don’t you?

  • Very Stable Bozi

    Oklahoma: Our citizens will soon learn that ‘panhandle’ has more than one meaning!

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Panhandle State University will he holding classes at the intersection of Main Street and Skid Row.

  • grindstone

    Yes, but: TAXES ARE THEFT!

    (unless you want schools, or busses, or roads, or clean water, but hey..)

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    Hungry children is just Jesus’ way of telling you to get a better job.

    • Very Stable Bozi

      Pray away the gay hunger.

  • Chris Hall

    Does Oklahoma need any infrastructure investment? They’re going to be hard pressed to build a new dog pound if they have to find 80% of the cost

    • Very Stable Bozi

      Dog Pound? Don’t you mean the new Canine Cuisine?

      • Chris Hall

        I LOLed

    • “Unpresidented” Linda

      I take it you’ve never driven on their highway system. Yes, it needs work.

      • onedollarjuana

        “Get a horse!”

    • jodyleek

      Oh, sure, the roads are horseshit, but the next Mad Max reboot they film there will look just great!

      • Chris Hall

        There’s always a plus side

  • BadKitty904
  • Ninja0980

    The gutting of the education system is by design, as an uneducated population will believe the lies that all the problems Oklahoma has is because of welfare cheats, illegals, queers etc. instead of the Republican Party in power.

  • FlemmishSpy

    Pity the world’s failed petro-states and their corrupt, inept governments.

  • Ling Ling

    Former Okie here. This all sounds bad (because it is) but has been building a long time. I was lucky enough to leave Oklahoma for university in California (in the 1970’s). What a shock. I ended up taking remedial classes for almost everything, added an extra year to my university time. My point is Oklahoma has never had strong education or much of anything you might take for granted in a first world country. Of course, I not return.

    • LadyLaz

      I see what you did there.

  • TheGrandWazoo2
  • Ninja0980
  • 3FingerPete

    Bootstraps!

  • OrdinaryJoe

    So your Prayer Day didn’t change things. Did you ever stop to think that maybe that was Jeezzuzz’s answer?

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      Like the Michelle Bachmann billboard from GOD. NO!

    • Beelzebubba

      To be fair, it was football season. Jeebus was pretty solidly booked.

      • OrdinaryJoe

        OU fell short in football too so Jebuz wasn’t really listening to the Oklahoma channel.

        • Beelzebubba

          They pray louder in Georgia, I guess.

  • Indiepalin

    If Brian Bosworth was governor, things might be different.

  • “Unpresidented” Linda

    In some, but not all, school districts in Oklahoma, they run a four day week. That doesn’t mean that the kids have a longer school year or stay longer than others who have a five day week. It just means that they get less educated than their neighbors in richer communities. How does that work? Aren’t kids supposed to go to school for X number of days in order to get credits? Are they being educated in a way that is equal to their peers in districts that can operate on a full schedule?

    What do you think?

    Oh well, Gov Fallin said we’d pray over it.

    • Gosala

      1. Fuck over poor people (bonus points if they’re black or Indian)

      2. Blame poor people for being fucked.

      3. Rinse and repeat

      • valgalky23

        Isn’t that the school curriculum in Oklahoma?

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          The republican plan for MAGA.

      • Teto85

        And that’s how Capitalism gets done.

      • Almost. If they’re white poor people, you blame the other poor people for their problems.

      • khanurik

        I, for one., am offended by your post. You didn’t have the common decency to use “poor people” and “lazy” in the same sentence like a common John Kelly. I say it’s banhammer time…

    • Shanzgood (15 Days!)

      They probably extend the school day.

      • “Unpresidented” Linda

        No, they do not. My cousin is a teacher in one such district. They close because it’s cheaper than keeping the lights on and the buildings heated.

        • Shanzgood (15 Days!)

          Wow.

        • Teto85

          And in some school districts in places like librul Califonia, they put up solar panels on roofs and carports in the student parking lots to generate ‘lecticity and in the summer the meters run backwards and the schools generate a profit. But these kinds of profits are anti-oil and not good capitalism.

          • “Unpresidented” Linda

            I think the Oklahoma Bible forbids that. Yeah, I’m pretty sure they’ll burn your house down if you go solar, cuz, the devil…

          • Snowbound Ron

            ‘Lucifer’ means ‘light-bringer.’ It’s in the Bibble!

          • “Unpresidented” Linda

            See?? You gotta power your home by burning cow poop in a furnace. Otherwise your crops will fail.

            Seriously, I have family in OK and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a solar panel.

      • Ling Ling

        I think not. I think the point is to reduce hourly wages.

        • “Unpresidented” Linda

          The point is to reduce utility costs. Those teachers would still make the same money, although not enough to make teaching worth it.

    • onedollarjuana

      I heard that there are universities that have banned students from some schools from being admitted because of the poor quality of education.

      • Justin Thyme

        the libral ones.

    • Cat Cafe

      It literally means that those kids aren’t eligible for most 4-year colleges, that their credits aren’t recognized. It is a straight-up path to failure, a return to ignorant peasants, and an utterly failed state, which weakens all of America. Almost traitorous in its shamefulness.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        So trumpencezee approved then?

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          A return to ignorant peasanthood is the Republican party’s fondest wish for the whole country. Starting with the people who vote for them.

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

            I marvel that they continue to fool them.

    • Cornelius Fussbudget

      It’s a feature, not a bug. If you educate them properly, they’ll just leave for more productive pastures. Or, worse, they’ll start voting Democrat.

    • khanurik

      You forgot “thoughts.” It’s “THOUGHTS and prayers.” I can’t understand why you can’t get that right. Prayers don’t do no good by themselves, you need them thoughts. Oh, I’m sorry, you mentioned Gov Fallin. No thoughts there for sure. My bad…

  • therblig
    • handyhippie65

      neat corn fact, they used corn plants that were almost 11′ tall, while an elephant’s eye is only about a foot of two above the head of the average human male.

  • BadKitty904
    • disraeli56

      I have read this time and time again – and yet …

      • BadKitty904

        See?

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    HuckaBooBoo thought bubble: Geez people, I’m lying as fast as I can.

    • TheMgt23

      TheGrandWazoo2
      Yours works well but I prefer Suckabee Sanders. When it explodes onto the internet, I demand credit plus of course a wikipedia entry (should start one now, don’t know how) and entries in the major dictionaries. I don’t want much out of life, just 15 milliseconds of fame.

  • Lord Jim

    “Governor Mary Fallin had an answer: prayer. The governor issued an official proclamation making 13 October Oilfield Prayer Day. Christians were to gather in churches and hope for a little divine intervention targeting falling worldwide oil prices.”

    Jesus didn’t say “Pray for whoever asks you for something.” He said “GIVE to whoever asks.” He didn’t say “If somebody asks for your coat, pray that they get one of their own.” He said “If someone asks for your coat, GIVE THEM YOUR CLOAK AS WELL.” Prayer is a supplement to action, NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR IT.

    Christianity. Ur Doin It Rong.

    • “Unpresidented” Linda

      One thousand upvotes.

    • Justin Thyme

      shoulda prayed harder!

    • UnsaltedSinner

      You cannot petition the Lord with prayer.

      • gene108

        What about with “Thoughts AND Prayers”? I bet that combo works every time.

        • Justin Thyme

          ah, the old Catch 22.

      • Snowbound Ron

        What if you have like 200 signatures?

      • Opalescent Riddles

        You mean something like this:

        “If You are the Son of God,” he said, “throw Yourself down. For it is written: ‘He will command His angels concerning You, and they will lift You up in their hands, so that You will not strike Your foot against a stone.’” Jesus replied, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”

        This is also why God does not answer prayers for sportsball teams.

      • stablegeniusahughes798

        So sayeth Apostle Jim.

    • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

      Why sir, you sound suspiciously like someone who’s actually *read* the Bible.

      • Lord Jim

        I try to keep it on the down-low so I don’t get kicked out of church. :D

    • Opalescent Riddles

      I always thought prayer was supposed to be recognition of one’s need for help, a time to reflect on God’s will, and an opportunity to receive enlightenment to be followed by getting off one’s ass and doing God’s will.

      I strongly suspect that God’s will is that the people of Oklahoma elect legislators who recognize the way to increase revenue is to incrementally do the opposite of what had led to decreased revenue. In other words, tax the rich, feed the poor.

      • Lord Jim

        Yes to all the above.

  • FlemmishSpy

    How do tax-cutting Republicans account for the market’s invisible hand choking the host in OK and KS?

    • gallbladder

      Such matters are apparently better left to Jeebus to deliberate.

    • gene108

      Tax cuts and deregulation cannot fail, they can only be failed.

      Still too many job killing regulations in OK, like child labor laws, minimum wage, worker’s comp, etc. undoing the good work done by tax cuts.

    • Justin Thyme

      Obama’s cheap oil.

      • Lord Jim

        Well-played.

    • disraeli56

      Is the invisible hand really choking? Seems more like fisting.

  • Ellie

    Perhaps Cadet Bone Spurs can promise to bring back clean beautiful oil?

    • Very Stable Bozi

      No, the oil needs to go overseas. Bring back clean coal for Oklahoma.
      “Oh, beautiful, for smoggy skies…”

      • Yellerduck

        I hear they got lots of cow chips. Those burn!

  • Anna Rompage

    Because of the tax cuts in Oklahoma, they would be experiencing a financial boom like the world has never seen before, except the Mexicans, and the gays, and the liberals, and the disabled, and the children of these heathens have caused gawd to focus his wrath on the state, and the almighty has destroyed the economy as punishment for letting these people live relatively unpersecuted…

    • Justin Thyme

      amen

      • Patrick

        Actually just stupid liberals such as the 4 of you, Oklahoma is a revenue neutral state, has a balanced budget amendment and NO DEBT.

        And I’ll promise that what ever “blue” shit whole city and state you’re commenting from you life is a miserable existence by comparison, and will be for at least the next 7 years!!! ENJOY

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          You must be a product of their fine educational system.

          • Patrick

            With that attitude I’m sure you’ll work out what went wrong in that last election anytime now, YUP!

          • stablegeniusahughes798

            I know exactly what went wrong in the last election. 90 million people couldn’t be bothered to get off their asses and vote.

    • Ling Ling

      Don’t leave out the gay abortion earthquakes.

  • Clearly they haven’t cut taxes enough. They need to go into the negative rate and just give companies all the money, then they’ll be enough prosperity for all and people can afford to send their children to private for-profit schools!

    • stablegeniusahughes798

      They could be like the corporations who have negative tax rates! The corporations pay no taxes AND get a tax refund!

  • Relativicus

    You keep mentioning schools but I don’t think education is much of a priority in Oklahoma. In fact, I’m fairly certain the charter for the OU system states, simply, “Beat Texas” (Nebraska was removed when they switched to the Big 10).

    • doktorzoom

      Wasn’t Oklahoma where the phrase “We hope to have a university the f’ball team can be proud of” originated?

      • Patrick

        Look who’s applying for the most arrogant liberal awards…

  • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

    “Thanks to a ballot initiative passed in the 1990s, any revenue increase has to be passed by a three-quarters super-SUPER-majority”

    I believe that’s called a super duper majority, Dok.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    When history books in the future mention that Republicans in the early 21st century spent their days praying for the oilfields, future generations may understand how the American empire crumbled. I just hope it doesn’t also explain why the world looks like something out of Mad Max.

    • Mr. White

      (Tunes up motorcycle, oils crossbow, tries on leather chaps)

      • Very Stable Bozi

        Date night?

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          Well they had a low budget for the movie so they used locals from the BDSM club, because they had the own costumes.

      • Blanche de Shambles

        *begins welding spikes to dune buggy*

    • arundel

      “praying for the oilfields”- It’s very pagan, isn’t it? Praying to see big phallic towers spurting again.. I’m only half-kidding. Like praying to the gods for rain for the crops. Or is it Big Oil that’s their deity?

  • Daniel

    “To use a pretty harsh word our revenues are litoterific, though maybe less so than they could be.”

  • hope for a little divine intervention targeting falling worldwide oil prices.

    Literally every solution Republicans come up with to address government debt involves soaking the poor.

    • gallbladder

      And whoring out god.

      • Lord Jim

        “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be loyal to the one and have contempt for the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.” Matt 6:24

        “Evangelicals” have made their choice. They have sold the Gospel (ευαγγελιον, “good news”) of Jesus Christ for earthly prosperity and power.

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          The god they worship is Mammon.

        • Jim Johnson

          And, for most of the freedumb morans, they have neither prosperity or power. They only serve wealth… and racism.

        • khanurik

          You nailed the prosperity and power things, but I would add “hate” for the trifecta of modern evangelicals. I was raised to be a good (pfft) Baptist, and sure, we didn’t cotton to no common Catholics and such as, but I don’t remember any real “hate” informing our religion. Of course I’m old, and back then we didn’t have the gays (especially no ice-skatin’ gays) and abortionists and your bathroom-loving transgenders to hate – all we had were Catholics – and OK, maybe your Southern Baptists and your Methodists. But I hope you’ll understand that times were tough back then with so few things to hate. Today there’s a rich target environment for the Evangelicals to hate, and boy, do they seem to be doing it well..

  • the governor and her state are Fallin.

  • Very Stable Bozi

    Oklahoma should Free Fallin.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lWJXDG2i0A

  • AlanInSF

    I join with Oklahomans in blaming the liberal bloggers who suggested Jeff Sessions’ allusion to the “Anglo-American justice tradition” was racist.

  • ChumpsForTrump

    Joke-lahoma has become broke-lahoma.

    They probably need to pray harder, to cancel out all the people in the other states praying for cheap gas.

  • Justin Thyme

    my butt hurts

  • At least Texas can always count on Oklahoma to make us look smrt!

    Seriously, awl bidness ain’t coming back to Oklahoma when the Permian in Texas is sexsploding oil all over the place. And Texas divested from relying on awl years go. However, teacher of the year better prepare for another bad time because property tax that funds schools is hanging out in the wrong hood of the legislature. It’s about to get shanked!

    • Erala Contratista

      Tejas divested when it dawned on folks that boom/crash one crop economies are shaky.
      Will OK, et. al. learn from that?
      Stay tuned.

  • JMP

    “Fallin quickly back-pedalled when it was pointed out that her proclamation only included Christians. “Prayer is good for everyone,” she reasoned.”

    Prayer is good for no one; it is literally the same thing as doing nothing, because it is nothing, it’s just wishing for something hard, which results in jack shit.

    • onedollarjuana

      It’s worse than nothing because it deters many folks from actually doing something.

      • Old town Urbandale

        A few days ago on one of my cancer support FB groups, a guy posted the attached meme. Seemed to some of us that the message was, “FU unbelievers, can’t you see what great people we are for praying for you.” We said we’d rather hear, “Let me bring you lunch” or “I’m going to shovel your walk.” https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5a241e5fa8fc01f61a4d6ac5652df8d17d7e9b1ac2b9595ec6bdcb91127ba576.jpg

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          I’m an atheist, but if someone says “I’ll pray for you,” I just say thank you. I’m not humbled, I was just raised to be polite. But there is nothing humble about that meme. I’m sure the person meant well. But you’re right, bringing lunch to someone going through chemo, or shoveling their walk is a much better thing to offer.

    • P’jama Pahnts

      It is, literally, the least you can do

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      I assume it might occasionally function like meditation, to calm someone down. But in terms of concrete fixes, totally useless.

  • Johnatx

    So, is there any state that is controlled by Republicans that hasn’t been completely fucked up or well on the way to being fucked up? New Jersey, Michigan, Wisconsin, Indiana, North Carolina, Louisiana, Oklahoma, Kansas, Texas all come to mind.

    • Jim Johnson

      They all aspire to be Mississippi.
      They can’t all be 50th out of 50.

      • mardam422

        They can tie.

      • Snowbound Ron

        10-way tie for last place?

    • Bitter Scribe

      Illinois would be, but luckily we just have a Republican governor.

      • Patrick

        And over $150 Billion in Debt and Unfunded liabilities…don’t come looking for the taxpayers to help you out!

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          Says who? Are you the boss now?

  • onedollarjuana

    But what do the Pioneer Woman’s dimples think of this?

    • stablegeniusahughes798

      Oh god….that woman. And her weird husband.

  • Nounverb911

    Will the last person to leave Oklahoma, please turn off the lights?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      The Sooner, the better.

      • Snowbound Ron

        WYDTISI

  • Ducksworthy

    My grandma down there in Le Flore County OK never did really quite get over the stupidity of the Republicans in the Hoover Administration whom she referred to as “wooden heads” on account of their stupidity. Some things never change.

    • Bitter Scribe

      Yeah, wasn’t that a sweet time in American history, when Republicans who fucked things up would actually get voted out of office?

  • Paperless Tiger

    They should have taken more taxes on the fracking boom while it lasted. Now all they got is earthquakes, dirty water, and poverty. By extension, the USA should be taking more taxes on the (Obama) economy while it lasts, which may not be long the way Trump is mismanaging everything. We are all Oklahoma.

    • Patrick

      We should be so LUCKY! Despite this PROPAGANDA trash article that has more lies than your queen Hillary, if nothing else at least then the nation like the Great State of Oklahoma would be FREE OF DEBT!

      • Lefty Wright

        With rivers catching fire, unsafe prescription drugs, government workforces cut back and only paid for 32 hours of work per week, and all of our money blown on overseas military adventures.

      • stablegeniusahughes798

        Citations, please.

      • doktorzoom

        Looks like someone’s making a bid for Dear Shitferbrains this week.

  • Bitter Scribe

    Yes, the Republicans have totally fucked up the state, but be reasonable…the alternative was Oklahomans voting for DEMOCRATS!!!

    • mardam422

      Heavens to Betsy!!!

    • Blanche de Shambles

      *faints*

    • khanurik

      Gasp! I’m taking to my swooning couch right now, mister

  • Nockular cavity

    That mean they can’t afford to do these commercials any more? Because I kind of liked them.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_sX8DNJHJg

    • Ducksworthy

      Maybe its time to edit out the “You’re doing fine Oklahoma” line in the State Song. Have to work in something to the effect of “You’re fucked again, time to head for California”.

      • Blanche de Shambles

        So…”Brother Can You Spare a Dime” or “Man of Constant Sorrow”?

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          For the short term it’ll be “Brother Can You Spare a Dime.” Long term, it’ll be “Man of Constant Sorrow.”

    • Msgr_MΩment

      You know why the state motto is “Oklahoma is OK”?
      They don’t know how to spell ‘mediocre, at best’.

  • Jim Johnson

    And, of course, that weasel in Wisconsin, Governor Walker, looks on with envy and wonders how much Kochsucking he needs to do to turn WI into a shithole state like OK.

    • Lulu’s Mom

      WI is well on its way to shithole status.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    Oh, Lord, please give me another oil boom. I promise I won’t piss it away this time.

  • hudson

    aha yet another set politicians who, in their infinite wisdom, figured that out as long as you can make monies in exploitation, you don’t have worry about developing your human resources.

  • Rick Hill

    Prayin’, huh? Too bad they didn’t think of doing that during the dust bowl years. California wouldn’t have had so many Okies moving there.

  • Ray in VT

    But Oklahoma did everything right. They cut taxes and cut taxes, so they should be rolling in all of this extra revenue, right? What went wrong? My bet is on Obama something something.

  • Royal Ugly Dude

    The governor issued an official proclamation making 13 October Oilfield Prayer Day.

    Nooooo! There’s already a national holiday on that date.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9cc9e71818240d6dfcbff2ad4538c8283b5abb40ead5309a5e0652e93092c66d.jpg

    • Jennaratrix

      Um. Every day is no bra day. Fuck those things. They can make me wear pants, but they can’t make me wear a bra!

      • capnkrunch

        You wear pants? Pretty sure this is a pants free zone.

        • Jennaratrix

          Eh. I feel weird walking around without pants.

          • Opiwan

            Are we talking “English pants”, “American pants”, or AOTK?

          • Jennaratrix

            AOT, K, definitely.

          • capnkrunch

            I love walking around at hone with just underwear. I have windows facing a park so it’s not always an option though.

          • Jennaratrix

            I have a 17-year-old stepson, so…

      • stablegeniusahughes798

        I envy women who don’t have to wear bras! They suck.

        • Jennaratrix

          Well, if it’s any consolation, I spent about 20 years waiting for my barely-A-cup boobies to grow in and hating them; it’s only the last 10 years or so I’ve appreciated the fact that being president of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee means I’m perpetually perky.

          • stablegeniusahughes798

            My sister is the same way. I got the big German Frau boobs from dear old mom’s side of the family, LOL. I worded what I wrote rather awkwardly, too. I meant that bras suck, not the women who don’t have to wear them! I just can’t even today.

          • Jennaratrix

            Girl, I feel ya. I just can even most days. (And I knew what you meant after I re-read it a couple of times.)

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Oilfield Prayer Day ironically, received no support from the Almighty.

    • Chris Hall

      Was no bra day instigated by a man (I’m guessing it was a man).

      NTIHAPWT

      • Mintie

        Not necessarily. There are a lot of women who are anti-bra due to potential health problems (not sure if they have all been debunked, too lazy to look, so I’m going with the tentative language here).

  • calliecallie

    As someone who survived Michigan’s “Lost Decade” of piss poor economy, I wish I had more sympathy for these folks. But I feel like they deserve what they voted for.

    • Patrick

      Thank you!

  • Jennaratrix

    The governor issued an official proclamation making 13 October Oilfield Prayer Day. Christians were to gather in churches and hope for a little divine intervention targeting falling worldwide oil prices.

    Are you fucking kidding me with this? What are they, the PetroBaptists from the Maddadam trilogy? I hate when life imitates art. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b8aef7e3e3dc2763e8069bbafdc66be499aeaba4996f2d558ac7a7998aead919.gif

    • Snowbound Ron

      Especially post-apocalyptic fiction.

      • Jennaratrix

        No shit. I thought it was bad enough when The Handmaid’s Tale turned out to be prophetic.

    • Zombishroom

      upfist for the Atwood reference. Loved those books!

  • Cornelius Fussbudget

    awl bidniss

    In the part of the south I’m from, it’s pronounced like “oral” with two syllables.

    • Trump’s Potemkin Village

      I wonder which state pronounces it “earl?”

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        I was in a stage production once (in youth theater) in which I had to play a miner who pronounced oil as “earl.” Because the script was written with a Southern accent in mind, it never quite worked with the word “earl” because it should have been “awl.” Then again, maybe I was reading the accent wrong.

      • Cliff Hendroval

        New Orleans and Brooklyn.

  • Gorillionaire

    I have traveled through OK twice in my life, and all I can tell you about it is that it is flat, barren, and more than a little depressing.

    • Walter Wellstone

      I have too. It’s ugly as fuck.

      • Patrick

        Another thing you have in common…

        • Walter Wellstone

          With whom? What do I have in common with whom? Come on, sonny, focus and you just might be able to type up a full sentence. You ca do it, champ, I believe in you!

          • HooverVilles

            …I believe in you!

            Why? ;-)

    • BeachLoafer

      I’ve only travelled through it once, and that was more than enough – why the hell did you do it again?

  • capnkrunch

    Oklahoma is like a caricature of a right wing hellscape, except for the part where it’s real.

    • Walter Wellstone

      We laugh about them here in Texas. That should tell you all you need to know about Oklahoma.

      • Patrick

        The like most insane people you sit around and laugh at things you don’t understand?

        • Walter Wellstone

          No, that’s what you do.

  • I get the impression that Oklahoma is the way it is because all the smart ones left for California during the Depression.

    • Historicat

      Thereby lowering the average IQ of two states.

      • Patrick

        I suggest that you two marry and attempt procreation thereby removing two defective DNA sets simultaneously…

        • stablegeniusahughes798

          I suggest that you may have lead poisoning.

  • aureolaborealis

    Hey, we did that thing where you throw money at oil companies so they’ll stay and do their thing, but without requiring anything of them in return. We give hundreds of millions of dollars a year in subsidies to oil companies. We also cut the maximum state share in half, so if oil ever gets back to $120+ a barrel, we only get half of what we got the last time it was $120 a barrel.
    In other news, and probably completely unrelated: We now find ourselves in a massive fiscal crisis leading to slashed budgets throughout state government.

    • Patrick

      That would be the GREEN wind companies which were brought here with enormous tax incentives and still cannot survive without constant feeding at the public taxpayer trough!

      • javadavis

        Source please.

        • HarpyLibtart

          I believe that Patrick might be referring to his recent publications in the Journal of Craniorectal Studies – they take pride in being aggressively wrong about everything, but you get a free pack of crayons and a tinfoil hat with each issue!

          • Patrick

            Unlike liberals who simply show up at a site of their comfort and suddenly become an expert in the subject matter de jour, I at one time lived with the individual responsible for approving the legality of any and all tax credits issued by the state before moving on to the Office of Attorney Gendral.

          • HarpyLibtart

            Sure you did, buddy.

      • aureolaborealis

        Where is ‘here’? I suspect that whatever your government is throwing at green companies is dwarfed by their subsidies for fossil fuels.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    I have a lot of family in Oklahoma. If they are any kind of a guide, Oklahoma is beyond fucked. They vote their bigotry, not their religion.

    • Widdle Kim

      Or they vote the lead and other heavy metals in their blood. There’s something in the water down there.

      • BearsEarsDeLaOursistance

        It certainly isn’t a pretty Picher.

        • Patrick

          And you wonder why you have no clue why Hillary lost the election? Most dangerous combination of traits is self supremacy and ignorance!

          • javadavis
          • Patrick

            Have you actually read the comments of your fellow liberal intellectual’s around the country lately?

          • javadavis

            I think you are running a higher ratio of supremacy and ignorance than the norm here. I am not saying all commenters here are perfect, that would be ridiculous, but you are not engaging in conversation, you are simply throwing unfounded mud around. And you are not backing any of it up with anti-ignorance. Example – your claim (don’t remember how you worded it) that there are no 4 day school weeks in OK. I posted a link to Tulsa World for you that talks about that 4 day school week. If you can post links to any of your claims that would support your argument.
            However, since your argument seems to consist of ‘you guys are all dumb and I don’t like you, there isn’t much to verify. In spite of the joking, most regular commenters here can get down to business in supporting their claims. Can you?

        • Unhappy Fingers

          Not even when seen by an Eagle.

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Picher,_Oklahoma
        Uncles and cousins live around this place.

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

          Nice downtown, there.

        • Widdle Kim

          Obviously I made the comment tongue in cheek, that’s a heart breaking read. Some of the Appalachians, different region, same madness, is hard to take as well.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            I can’t believe my family lives in this stuff, sees the effects of the state’s policies every day, and just goes along with it as if it were normal.

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      Is one and the same, no?

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        Yes, usually. But I tend to give most religious people a break. Except the fundies. Fuck those guys. My family are just deeply southern baptists so, you know, deeply horrible.

  • SKruetheratbassedarDs

    Heavy points for featuring Saint Molly: she needs a Norquist-knockoff to barnstorm the country getting buildings and other stuff named after HER!!!

    • TheMgt23

      SKruetheratbassedarDs
      YES!!!

  • Trump’s Potemkin Village

    Another failed Kochtopia. Whocouldanode?

    • Walter Wellstone

      Failed? I’m sure Randolph and Mortimer consider having Scott Pruitt doing their bidding at the EPA a victory. Remember, to them everyone else’s lives are worth $1.

      • Patrick

        I’m sure you consider Puerto Rico a success store too, I mean it only takes a natural disaster and $50 Billion in U.S. Tax dollars hidden as disaster relief to restore that democrat run shit whole to some semblance of normalcy…

        • Walter Wellstone

          Who’s talking about Puerto Rico? We’re making fun of Okla-motherfucking-homa. You gotta keep the pace, son.

          • HooverVilles

            Patrick is just saying SQUIRREL!!!11!1!

          • Patrick

            I’m saying why would anyone listen to the party that runs a criminal for President, spend the next 8 years in a psychotic state alternating between howling at the sky and constantly reassuring one another that they’ve figured out what went wrong and won’t let it happen again?

          • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

            I believe it’s Okla-motherfucking-a-homa…

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      What I don’t understand is how any of this possibly benefits people like the Kochs.

      • Old town Urbandale

        They feed off the misery of others?

      • javadavis

        Benefits: lower taxes, tax kickbacks for their mineral extraction and other bidness, they can live wherever they want so they don’t have to suffer from degraded infrastructure – even if they lived in OK they can use helicopters to avoid bad roads.
        Drawbacks – What do they care about the regular people who live there as long as they don’t have to pay Anything in social safety nets?

  • anon_the_great

    Maybe the good people of Oklahoma should petition the UN for relief.

  • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

    Oklahoma – because God took pity on Mississippi.

  • counterlife

    I grew up in SW Kansas on the Oklahoma border. Oklahoma has always been a low tax/lousy government services state, with poor roads and crummy schools, and it sounds like they are even worse now, thanks to the Koch types trying to set aside everything for themselves. The Kochs (Kansas boys) really want everyone dead but the people they need to preserve their wealth and power. Kansas used to take pride in being better than Oklahoma, but not any longer. Kansas is making its first attempts to recover from being Koched and Brownbacked by electing a more moderate and slightly less Koch owned legislature, but it will take generations to get back to the condition this red state was in before Kochs/Brownback (just 7 years ago). At least Kansas has some recent history to look back to and try to emulate, Oklahoma not so much.

    EPA’s Trumpanzee Scott Pruitt is an Okie. I am pretty sure all my Okie relatives are Trump supporters. Somethings not right there.

  • BadKitty904

    Perhaps it’s time to set aside Oklahoma and Kansas as a kind of “reservation’ for the shrinking right-wing WASP population. A place where they will be safe and secure “for as long as the grass shall grow…”

    • Erala Contratista

      Good Kitty!

      • BadKitty904

        Seems fair to me.

        • Patrick

          I’d say stick a sock in it and worry about your own problems, now one is asking you for anything unlike all you blue state maggots who cannot survive without the WELFARE of the entire nation, get used to paying your own state taxes for a while before you decide that you know better that those states that don’t depend on others for a FREE RIDE!

          • UpstateNYObserver

            You ought to check the tax policy institutes figures on which states get more federal revenue back than they put in – RED states make of the majority of that list and some of the numbers are scary. Upstate NY has a lot of people who are utterly convinced that NYC takes all their tax money. They’re so angry they want to become their own state. Problem is that nearly 80% of state money spent on infrastructure sources from just 7 counties (Westchester, NYC (5 boroughs) and Nassau). If upstate split it would instantly make Mississippi happy – they wouldn’t be last in so many categories. Supply side economics and the Laffer Curve are cons to give more money to people who simply like to count their money – as Trump himself said its just kind of a way to keep score. During every Republicans mythical golden time – the fifties, Eisenhower’s administration – the highest tax bracket wasn’t 37%, it was 95%. The country thrived.

          • HooverVilles

            & THIS

          • TheMgt23

            UpstateNYObserver
            Absolutely. The tax rate means nothing. GE often pays ZERO income tax on hundreds of billions of dollars of income. And that with “the highest tax rate in the world”. Yeah…

          • handyhippie65

            it is an easily proven fact that blue states contribute more to the federal government than they get. not so with the red states. they receive more than they contribute. the red states are the takers in our society. i know, i live in one. i own a small business as a self employed carpenter. i own my home, and have no problem paying my taxes, property, or otherwise. paying taxes is one of the duties of citizenship. they are not government theft, and if your state is too stupid to raise enough revenue to do what it needs to do, that’s on you. when all of the intelligent people move away, and the feds have to take it over, mebbe the new government will use some common sense when establishing the tax rate, not some lame ass ayn rand book.

          • HooverVilles

            This

          • arundel

            I can’t tell if Patrick’s fooling or auditioning for Deleted Comments of the Week.

          • handyhippie65

            i think he really believes it. doesn’t say much for the state of education in oklahoma, does it.

          • Patrick

            Typical liberal intelligence level: What was it that happened again in that last election? Inquiring minds want to know…

          • arundel

            When did you start gargling Putin’s hairy balls?

          • Patrick

            What a peach you are…did your mommy tell you to say that?

          • stablegeniusahughes798

            Oh go fuck yourself. Blue states keep the red states in business. You red state morons take more money from the kettle than you put in. You are useless takers.

          • Patrick

            Keep telling yourself that Nancy…but most people with any sense of purpose don’t equate monies spent on the Military with Section 8, food stamps, welfare, Obama phones and ghetto insurance!

          • stablegeniusahughes798

            Actually, Brad, lots of military families are on food stamps and other forms of public aid. We could cut the military budget by 1/3, still be the most well armed country on earth, and use the military budget cut to pay for a lot of other things. Getting rid of private contractors in the military would be a good start.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Speaking of reservations, these two states used to be collectively called the Indian Territory, so I say let’s give it back.

      • javadavis

        Typical. Move in, shoot all the buffalo, frack the stuff out of it, then say “oh, hey, never mind Cochise. I’ll give it back and let you clean up the mess. Just let me make sure I got all the gold out first.”

      • BadKitty904

        No, the Native Americans deserve better. It should go to Republicans.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    I thought maybe the threshold for amending the OK constitution would be lower than 3/4 of the leg, and it is, but still requires approval in a referendum. I’m guessing the stupidity of the majority of Oklahoma voters makes that untenable.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    This just in: Oklahoma considers reversion to “Unorganized Territory” status. “Being organized just made things worse; we clearly don’t know what the fuck we’re doing”, said one state legislator.

    • Give it back to the Native Americans. Maybe they can run it better – certainly couldn’t do any worse.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Just when a state thinks it’s reached the bottom in something, another outdoes it. Every Alabama has a Mississippi, every Kansas, an Oklahoma.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Does this “cutting revenue to increase revenue” thing work for these idiots’ personal finances? Enquiring minds want to know.

    • Stulexington

      Oh yes, they cut taxes and they get rich.

      • UpstateNYObserver

        Right after they chug that case of Ice Beer.

  • Jgb979

    “Thanks to a ballot initiative passed in the 1990s, any revenue increase has to be passed by a three-quarters super-SUPER-majority in the Legislature.”

    Shit like this is what screwed California for decades from the time of St. Rambo Ronnie. It took a ballot initiative and Dems getting a super majority in the legislature to stop the state from going broke under the governator

    *Spoiler alert, its been the most productive state in the country since then. Weird how it’s almost the exact opposite of the broken horrifying hellscape of Oklahoma where you can make more as a 7/11 clerk than a teacher.

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      And a state that was labeled by pundits to be “ungovernable” suddenly became governable. All it took was getting rid of gerrymandering and the 2/3 majority needed to pass a budget.

    • khanurik

      Amen and preachin’ to the choir, dude. See my posts above..

  • goonemeritus

    If tax cuts to the rich have stopped working maybe it’s time to just start giving the rich some other insensitive. Maybe they could give them a quantity of the poor to toil for them or let them hunt the poor for sport.

  • Garbageman

    As it has been pointed out, many times, unlike the Feds (who can always print more Monopoly money) states actually must pay their bills. So tax cuts don’t exactly work the same with them. Amazing, isn’t it? That this never seems to occur to these geniuses?

    • Patrick

      More likely all the “feebies” given to green energy companies that 20 years down the road still can non show the ability to survive without being funded by the taxpayer: Can I hear you say “WIND…”

      • UpstateNYObserver

        Given that solar employs more people than the fossil fuel power industry now and those salaries pour money back into their communities that ain’t that bad an investment. Not to mention the, albeit small right now, contribution to a cleaner environment.

        • TootsStansbury

          It didn’t take long for it to change the subject.

          • UpstateNYObserver

            He follows the model of throw everything at anything and maybe something sticks…and usually fact free.

      • OOOOOOOOOOOOOklahoma where the WIND comes sweepin’ cross the plain……

      • Freebies. The word is FREEbies.

      • Oh and so you know….the single industry that gets the most kick backs via tax payer dollars?
        That would be the oil industry.

      • thixotropic jerk

        Can I hear you say “CLEAN COAL…” because the bullshite spewing outchyer ass makes about as much sense.

        • Patrick

          Don’t bother to back that liberal loud mouth up with anything approaching a fact…

    • FeloniousMonk

      THIS. The feds control the money supply. The folksy-family-budget analogies don’t work for the feds … but the states need actual revenues, just like families do.

  • Patrick

    This article is COMPLETE SHIT! Too many outright falsehoods to address in a single anger management rant, however:

    Oklahoma has a balanced budget amendment. So before you go pointing fingers and call us a FAILING state you might want to check the balance because you’ll find we have no debt. And yes in lean years it can be pretty lean, such as when oil has been so cheap for so long that Venezuelan’s are eating their pets.

    I’ll skip reading the comments of the numerous fools who’ve chimed in and shown about as much knowledge of this state and it’s politics and they did in the last Presidential election, need I ask “How did that work out for you”?

    • UpstateNYObserver

      I decided to check the fact on teacher salaries. Starting salary is generally $31,600 for a certified teacher. For a 52 week year that’s a bit over $15/hr. Yes, I know a school calendar is 9 months on average but teachers typically take additional training, work on lesson plans and prep for the next school year. So while classroom time is limited to the school calendar good teachers work well beyond that. As a comparison, Vermont pays $10k to $25k more on average. Significantly higher with 20 or more years of experience. So with salaries like that keeping quality teachers in Oklahoma becomes problematic over time. You can get around that a bit by waiving the need for certification but that poses risks of seriously unqualified teachers just simply baby sitting a room full of kids. Reality is that a “balanced” budget simply means that revenue and expenses need to be equal. That doesn’t mean if static revenues drop then you simply cut more, budgeting shouldn’t create a suicide pact with the citizens of Oklahoma. Taxes are necessary to have any sort of governing structure, teachers, highways, cops, firefighters, public hospitals the list goes on. They’re all labor intensive too. With employees, like a great many things, you get what you pay for.

      • Lefty Wright

        North Carolina, after years of insulting teachers and freezing wages, found enrollment in education classes in state universities plummeted and the few graduates were leaving for nearby states and getting thousands more in starting salaries. When it was publicized that South Carolina paid several thousand more, the legislature was embarrassed enough to finally raise starting salaries. But they failed to do anything for teachers with 20 or 30 years experience, which hampers recruiting. Who wants to enter a profession where you see almost no chance of better pay down the road. Tell someone they may start at $30,000 but will never get more than $45,000 regardless of how well they do their job or how long they work and many will say no thanks.

        • Mystery_Poster

          My son was just looking in SC, about 30k to start, and that’s with a master’s degree .

      • Mystery_Poster

        As I put it for my Trump-loving mother, “taxes pay for stuff.”

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

          I like to say “Taxes pay for things.” It’s more specific…

      • thixotropic jerk

        LOOKIT YOU ALL MR MCSMARTYPANTSER UPPITY NEW YORKE STATER GUY!111!! WELL WE IN OKAFUCKINHOMY GOTS NEWS FOR YOU BOY WE LUV IT HERE IN BROKE AS FUK OKYDOPEY OK? AND NEXT TIME TRY SPEAKIN AMERICANO NIT THAT EUROPOTECHNO JIBBER JABBER!!!1111!1

      • Patrick

        Find me a teacher who works 40 weeks in a year and I’ll find you a plain ole run of the mill liberal liar…

        • UpstateNYObserver

          Since I married one I’ve watched it for over 30 years and know personally how many hours a teacher actually puts in for a classroom. I also spent 9 years on a school board too. You just can’t stop pulling that rancid bullshit out of your ass can you? In terms you’ll understand, you’re simply a lying sack of shit and everyone on this site can see that. Go back to Breitbart or World Net Daily or whatever alt-right fact free septic tank you crawled out of.

    • bubba
    • Oklahoma called itself a failed state. Because it is failing. Because it is literally failing as a state.
      And the correct question is “how did that work out for any of us” and I will point to Oklahoma as exhibit A.

      • Patrick

        But like all liberals every argument will be completely devoid of factual evidence to support your claim…

        For sheep, like you in this forum, it’s simply enough that another liberal parrot some statement that of it’s face makes you feel good and that passes for fact!

    • HazooToo

      Flagged for Impersonating a Human.

  • Mintie

    Pray for oil. Pray. For. Oil.

    • Mystery_Poster

      In GA, our governor called for prayer to end our drought .

      I would’ve done a rain dance for 5k, haha.

      • Mintie

        That doesn’t bother me as much. You could argue that droughts increasingly are man-made due to the uptick in global warming, but in the end, it’s still a natural phenomenon. A philosophically bankrupt politician calling for school children to pray for the oil is pretty much telling them to ask God for the rich to get richer, on the off-chance that said rich feel moved to toss some pocket change at the state infrastructure that said politician screwed up in the first place.

  • Patrick

    International home of FOOLS. When one day anyone who reads and believes the drivel on this site GROWS UP and GROWS A BRAIN, take the RED PILL.

    • Walter Wellstone

      I take them krill oil red capsules regularly and I can say my triglycerides have dropped considerably since I started doing that. Good stuff.

    • Lefty Wright

      Say Patrick the scarecrow from Oz.

    • Justin Thyme

      What’s the source of your information that refutes anything in this article?

    • Trumpsters_are_fools

      bet that sounded real good in your alleged brain LOL!

    • handyhippie65

      this site reports on news stories. as in stories that can easily be found on news sites all over the web. i read this story BEFORE i came here to comment on it. we don’t live in the matrix, this is real life, not a movie.

    • Patrick, dear, what you are contesting is actual fact that is actually happening.
      Maybe you should try the blue pill for a while? And you know, learn a thing.

      • ladycat713

        Patrick is a breitbart escapee.

        • Patrick

          Just what I needed a “good thrashing” from a couple of discerning liberals…I’m certain that you’re certain it’s just too nuanced for me to understand; right?

          • ladycat713

            Exactly where did I thrash you ? Point to the place on the doll.

          • Patrick

            You’ve confused me with someone on whom psychoanalysis is effective; Irish and all…

    • thixotropic jerk

      PATTYCAKES IS OBVS AN AMMATOOR AT THIS WITH HIS LACK OF FULL ALL CAPS AND NOT ENOUGH SPELIN AIRERS11!!!! GO HOME TA YER MOMMY LIL PATTY BOY N LIT THE REAL MGTOWS HANDLE THESE DANGHERUS COMMIE WONKADILLIDIDILDOESES!!111!

    • blaid droog

      Do u live in a state whose principal income is from cottage industry meth labs?

      • Patrick

        No, tell me how that’s working out for your state?

        • blaid droog

          Florida relies on farms, ranches, citrus groves and screwing stupid fucking tourists. I guess your state like most red states sucks from the tax dollars the blue states pour into the federal treasury. Plus your homemade meth industry. Fuck u.

          • Patrick

            Stay away from the pony’s and pay others to manage you money…The majority of individuals in Oklahoma look at all forms of WELFARE as a FAILURE of ONESELF and to be AVOIDED! The VAST MAJORITY of Federal tax dollars spent in our state have historically gone to the MILITARY, U S Interstates and FEDERAL GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEES and the RETIRED. Oklahoma has around 10+ military installations, the FAA and the National Weather Service are also located here along with thousands of miles of U.S. Interstate highways to be maintained.

            That said Obama did his hope and change number on the Oklahoma population just as everywhere else and a substantial amount of UNEMPLOYMENT dollars and now that they’ve been replaced with cheap off books Mexican labor; both Social Security and Welfare dollars come here.

            As for the the “homemade meth industry”, it’s very unlikely that meth in any substantial quantity is being produced here given the ease of bringing in across our southern borders, however people do respect the law and will report you if the believe you to be engaged in potential illegal activities…

          • Wes

            I only use American made artisanal meth. Just like Grandma used to make in the bathtub.

      • girdyerloins

        HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
        Sigh, sniffle……oh, my, aren’t you just THE most darling little algorithm…..
        HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    • girdyerloins

      HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
      Sigh, sniffle……oh, my, aren’t you just THE most darling little algorithm…..
      HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      • Patrick

        I’ll give you credit for spelling but the context of the usage is without reason…

  • Patrick

    Don’t know a single school district that only has a four day week…who makes up this tripe?

  • Anarchy Unicorn

    Relying on out of state firefighters. Not to be cruel, but the firefighters should just set up on the border and only fight fires that actually come across the line. To do otherwise would reward the Okies fiscal irresponsibility.

    My only experience with OK was getting shaken down by a rural cop in the middle of the night. “Son, you can pay this fine right now in cash, or you can wait in jail until the judge can see you on Monday morning.” I paid the cash, and haven’t been back to the state since.

    • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

      Did you get a receipt?

      • Anarchy Unicorn

        This was 25 or so years ago. I was young and dumb, or younger and dumber.

        • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

          I can relate.

    • handyhippie65

      did he give you a ticket, or just tell you you were. if there was no paper work, you know he just pocketed it.

      • Anarchy Unicorn

        No ticket. Just a cash exchange.

  • pgjack

    There is nothing wrong with irradiated milk. It makes the kids easier to find in the dark.

  • Bebecca

    and I’m afraid the state of Kentucky has KS and OK as role- models now that we have a jesus-freak republican businessman governor.

    • khanurik

      So, welcome to my world (KS and OK survivor). By the way, at least KS kicked Brownback upstairs(?) and now he’s (and not making this up) the U.S. Ambassador for International Religious Freedom. So God help us all. Well, not actually “us” but the rest of your common international people who have to suffer he who is Brownback. Sorry, don’t blame Kansas!

      • mailman27

        A job, a position, that never existed until 2017. Fiscal responsibility!!! Ambassador For International Religious Freedom??? You have got to be fucking kidding me.

  • Me not sure

    After the massive Federal effort needed to help Oklahoma recover from the Dust Bowl years, you would think that they would have learned that a government too small to help ANYONE is not worth having.

    • mysonsam

      In order to learn from history you would need to remember it or at least trouble yourself to read about it.

      • HooverVilles

        And have enough functioning neurons to understand it.

        • mysonsam

          true…

    • bettycat

      Amazingly their Granddaddys & Grannys weren’t so fucking stupid as today’s crop of “Sooners”. Oklahoma was #2 in the USA in supporting the Socialists in the 1912 election (barely behind Nevada) with 16.4% of them voting for Debs. The times they have changed.

    • goCatgo

      Thar ain’t none o’ that thar libral larning in OK. None. Zero. Zip. Nada.

  • khanurik

    Yer preachin’ to the choir on this one, Dok. I grew up in Kansas (pre-Brownback) and I’ve lived in Oklahoma for a while and I’m a citizen of the USA (allegedly). So I almost have trickle-down bingo. Oddly enough, today I got into an email war with one of the editors of the Tulsa World Said editor wrote a column praising Governor Mary Fallin for her “come to Jesus” moment when she recently pleaded for more school funding. I don’t often write to the nice folks down to the Tulsa World (a fine newspaper by the way – other than their editorial board), but I had to kindly point out that Fallin was the very one that pimped out the whole tax-cut thing in the first place – which devastated the schools and social programs and prisons, and I can’t even go on. Said editor called me “smug” and “cynical.” Well, at least I’m not “hungry” and “isn’t learning” like a common Oklahoma kid. By the way, according to my friends in Moscow, “trickle-down bingo” was what those hookers in the Ritz-Carlton were going for…

    • Vacuous Virgina

      “trickle-down bingo ” 😂😂😂

    • You are smug and cynical for pointing out that the nice lady fucked the entire thing up so her gee, won’t someone think of the children bit is a bit too little too late?
      Weird, that editor does not understand fact. Probably should not be in journalism.

      • khanurik

        Yeah, but this Oklahoma where we have a low bar for journalism and such as other U.S. Americans and such as

      • Robyn Ryan

        Jernalizts. Doing Jernaliizm on a gig basis.

      • khanurik

        You think THAT’S weird, In one of our back-and-forth emails with the editor, I might have used the term “YOUR republican party” – which, even I (your wishy-washy Independent) , a smug and cynical kind of guy like a common fan of the Wonkette should have known was a scurrilous charge. I was all set to apologize when said editor informed me he was a lifelong Democrat. So yeah, I’m in the emergency room right now with a broken brain. By the way, this very morning in the Tulsa World, one of the main articles was about the latest failure of the Oklahoma legislature to actually pay teachers for there efforts (teachers? PFFT). And fun fact: the reason it failed was because they couldn’t get a super-majority (75%) on the spending bill. Guess who the Governor was who pimped out the idea of the fabulous super-majority thing for revenue increases? Unfortunately, I’m an old and my memory ain’t so good, but I do remember the last name was Fallin. I forget the first name. Was it “Stormy?” Yeah that was it: Stormy Fallin…

  • Beelzebubba

    So the super-super-majority provision, no doubt a GOP braindrizzle, ended up handing the Dems some leverage they would not otherwise have?
    True jenius.

  • …they prayed for the price of oil to rise?
    WHAT?

    • Vel Venturi

      Welcome to Texahoma, that’s how we roll.

      • HooverVilles

        Sigh!

    • phoenix00

      …. never mind the cost of filling up their pickups and SUVs are also gonna go up, but thank goodness math isn’t taught in school nowadays.

      • HooverVilles

        B-b-b-but when the price of gas goes up there will be moar $ tinkling down and they will be able to effort the gas for their pickups.
        Presto chango. Magic.
        Umm, unless democrats are in charge, then the rising oil prices are bad.

        See math explained!
        You’re welcome. ;-)

        • phoenix00

          Also: “the demoncrats forced me to buy a Prius, violation of libbety and freedums”

  • Robyn Ryan

    What a failed state looks like. Disaster capitalists will move in to privatize what’s left.
    Instant Greece and Puerto Rico.

  • thixotropic jerk

    But we had to destroy the state in order to really fucking destroy it.

    • HooverVilles

      But we had to destroy the state in order to rebuild it really fucking destroy it.

  • Tyson

    States Rights gonna fuck y’all country Okies over!

  • Heyzeus Ahchay

    “ ‘Our situation is dire,’ Oklahoma finance director Preston Doerflinger said.”

    But he didn’t say “die or” what? I need to know!

  • mailman27

    The First World Laughingstock!! USA USA USA USA !!!!!!!!

  • blaid droog

    My answer to everything is and always has been thermonuclear holocaust. Let’s just nuke the red states out of existence. Make them uninhabitable for the next ten thousand years. No one will miss them and after a while they will have the cachet of being forbidden zones. Great sci-fi stories will be written about mans follies over falling into the fallicies of foolish overweening conservatism. Plus we would be removing the plague of evangelical idiocy.

    • James

      You planning on lifting us liberals out of red states as well, or are we just collateral damage?

      • blaid droog

        In my scenario, we will all go. I’m old and sick of it all. The human race has no justification for contiued existence. Let the whales have the planet. They were here first.

    • “Unpresidented” Linda

      I’m still in here!

  • HooverVilles

    Avatar
    Ray in VT
    8 hours ago
    But Oklahoma did everything right. They cut taxes and cut taxes, so they should be rolling in all of this extra revenue, right? What went wrong? My bet is on Obama something something.

    Speaking of cutting revenue in an endless loop to solve the economy, Mark Fiore has this,

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?t=15s&v=U7fCsEER7t8

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      That was our brilliant GOP’s plan. Then when they inherit a prosperous economy, they decide tax cuts for the rich, and massive spending are what is needed.

    • TheMgt23

      HooverVilles
      Great story but missed the part about Greece selling it’s incomparable history, islands, you name it. Read Naomi Klein about Smash Grab Capitalism. It’s a horrific crime if ghetto blacks do it for at most a few hundred dollars but when German banks destroy an entire nation it is simply good business netting billions.

      • HooverVilles

        Thanks. I will check that out.

  • James

    When Mary Fallin was elected, we moved from Oklahoma, taking a loss on our house in the middle of the housing crisis, because we knew what would happen.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Smart move.

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  • Mike Steele

    When oil, which firms were taking from OK, was booming, that was the time for OK to raise taxes on those profits…but nooooo…So the state missed out on the boom, but will be forever stuck with the bust – see USGS stats on their state of perpetual tremors. They sent us Pruitt; they deserve him back.

  • FeloniousMonk

    At what point can the feds just pass an Oklahoma Reconstruction Act, and put the entire place under military jurisdiction, like they did with the South? Article 4 Section 4 of the Constitution clearly allows it when a psycho oligarchy has taken over the state government and instituted 75% super-majority requirements. Put a general in charge until they pass a normal constitution and until after the military oversees a few elections. Kick out their Senators and Congressperson until they straighten up.

  • Wolverines!

    In Colorado, we’ve had a very small amount of this financial derpness. Of course, it was in, wait for it, Colorado Springs (home to Focus on the Family). They cut their taxes and suddenly couldn’t keep the streetlights on, pick up the trash in their parks or fix the streets. Meanwhile, the most liberal place east of California, Boulder, doesn’t seem to have these problems.

    • Wes

      They just have other problems like extreme self importance and gluten “intolerances.” Boulder is a weird place.

      • OppressedMass

        I lived in Boulder in the seventies, when it was cool — and it really was.

        Now they’re just silly. Plus they really over-built on the outskirts.

  • goCatgo

    This is only 26 reasons out of at least 100 I can think of to not live in OK. Sorry OK Dems, it is too late to save the state, get out while you still can. Also anyone who cares about a future for their children.
    IMHO the biggest long term problem they have is alcohol and drug dependencies and additions. The drug money has had to reach the highest levels of govt by now, and the efforts to stop it is only a dog and pony show. With the largest efforts on enforcement, not on prevention or rehab, and those only for show and political gain. Scott Pruitt has clearly shown us that governing in OK is only a stepping stone for greater ambitions.

  • OppressedMass

    Wow. From where I am, lolling in the luxury of a Blue State, it’s hard to believe this is a description of America.

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