Oh, it's this asshole again
Just distribute this picture to all teenagers in Maine. No more teen sex.

It’s no secret that Maine’s rightwing governor, Paul LePage, hates the poors and has taken any number of steps to stop them from whooping it up on the public dime, whether he’s imposing work requirements and asset limitations on food stamp recipients, or trying to prohibit them from buying baloney that’s too good for them. LePage’s latest attempt to dick over poor people, the Bangor Daily News reports, involves taking $1.7 million in cash welfare funding and, instead of distributing it to needy families, paying Christian-run outfits to hold after-school classes to tell teenagers to not get pregnant.

Crom knows if you give money to people in poverty through the federally funded Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) program, they’ll only waste that cash on fripperies like clothes or shoes or other godless foolishness. As we’ve noted previously, even as the number of families in poverty has increased, Maine has actually cut back by two-thirds on the assistance it provides through TANF. That’s resulted in a big surplus of unspent TANF funds that could go to poor families, but won’t.

You see, TANF rules allow the diversion of some TANF funds to other programs, as long as they help kids in some way; since 2015, Maine has been spending money on nifty after-school programs that will supposedly reduce teen pregnancy, or at least tell teenagers not to fuck — or to get married if they do. So you get really excellent uses of funds for programs like the “Youth Leadership Academy” run by My Place Teen Center:

As part of the academy, about 60 students (out of 500 who use the teen center) commit to participating regularly in activities that stress health and wellness, social-emotional skills, career readiness and civic engagement.

Another outfit, an overnight church camp called “Fair Haven Camps,” got TANF funds to run an after-school class for 17 middle-schoolers who partook in

outdoor activities in wilderness survival, arts and crafts, and lessons in financial literacy provided by volunteers from Bangor Savings Bank.

So much better than letting poor parents waste that money on socks and underwear for snotty toddlers! The federal funds can be disbursed to church groups like that, just as long as the programs aren’t “inherently religious activities.” So they can say “Let’s go hiking and think clean thoughts, but not “Let’s all pray the Devil won’t send us dirty thoughts.”

It gets even better: A spokesperson from the Maine Department of Health and Human Services couldn’t specify to the Bangor Daily News what kind of quality control they have for the programs, how the department chose the programs in the first place, or even a basic question like the number of kids being served by the after-school programs. But it’s definitely worthwhile, because if the programs DO convince several thousand teens not to get pregnant, just think of all the money the state will save! No, there doesn’t appear to be any mechanism to evaluate whether the programs are actually preventing pregnancy. Why do you ask?

As Slate points out, Maine isn’t the only state to shift TANF funds away from actual cash payments to poor families instead treating TANF as a slush fund to cover other state programs:

Only half of TANF money is being spent directly on cash assistance, child care and work support. Some states spend less than 20 percent of their TANF funding on these core concerns. Unsurprisingly, many of the states that have done the most to cut off assistance to people in poverty are those run by Republican governors and legislatures.

As Slate reported last year, some states use TANF money on marriage counseling programs, often attended by middle-class couples who have no need of financial assistance. Marketplace found that Michigan has started using TANF money for college scholarships, half of which go to middle- and upper-class families.

This is really great news, since obviously it means poverty is vanishing — or at least it should, just as soon as all the anti-poverty programs’ funds are redistributed upward. (As we already know, while rich people need more money as an incentive to go to work, poor people need less money as an incentive to go to work.) Perhaps on that glorious day when all anti-poverty programs are discontinued, poor people will finally get it through their heads that they should stop being poor. Then America truly will be great again.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to help. We promise not to spend it on fancy bologna wait actually that is exactly what we will spend it on, sorry.

[Bangor Daily News / Slate]

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  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • GoutMachine

    How is this fucker still in office?

    • The Wanderer

      From what I understand, the Democrats in Maine fought a pitched civil war and ended up divided, allowing LePage to slither his way in.

      • ArgieBargie

        Wait, Democrats shooting themselves in the foot? Impossible!

        • TJ Barke

          This is wonkette, surely you mean unpossible?

      • There was an Independent moderate, who sucked off opposition to Lepage. Then he did it *again*, letting Lepage get reelected.

        • chazmanr

          Why aren’t you blaming the shit stains who voted for Lepage?

          I would rather visit most southern states than visit Maine ever again (and I hate the south with a passion). The most unfriendly, inhospitable and suspicious assholes live in Maine.

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

            Depends on where you are, it has a very big dependence on tourism, so most at least will have a facade of politeness.

      • sarafina


    • Ellie

      Third party.

  • Eileen Besse

    LePage is SUCH a waste of skin, flesh and fat.

  • msanthropesmr

    Movies, and booze.

  • msanthropesmr

    I’m going to start my own TANF with blackjack and hookers.

    • Indiepalin

      Get in line.

  • AntrimCycle

    This is only one of the many, many reasons Nov 2018 can’t come soon enough for most of us in the state of Maine

    • GoutMachine

      And the other 49 …

    • mailman27

      Please, please don’t split the reasonable vote this time.

      • AntrimCycle

        He’s term-limited, but doesn’t mean we won’t mess it up again anyway. There’s a lot of people jumping into this race, a few almost as bad as him. But there’s some really good progressives so hopefully they won’t split the vote and try to decide on just one. (My local council race in Portland just recently did that with 2 good progressives who split the vote and the incumbent got back in – ugh)

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    With shit like this and TSP being stopped I have taken up the hobby of praying just to believe there is a heaven and a hell.

  • Ellie

    I can’t do this anymore today. I’m going to YouTube and watch kittens. I was going to buy this for myself for my birthday but I don’t think I can wait that long. I have friends in Maine (who did NOT vote for Jabba LePage) and they have my deepest sympathy for having to live with him in the Governor’s seat.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      I, for one, welcome our new robot cat overlords.

    • bbayliss

      I’ve been putting off repainting the entryway for 6 months;
      Masking tape…check
      See ya later.

  • (((fka_donnie_d))), SOB

    Clearly there is no poverty, lePage hasn’t seen any

  • This is the plan for Medicaid too if the GOPers get around to turning it into block grants. Poverty is considered a sin or character flaw..

    Of course, if they were really worried that all the lucky duckies on public assistance were lying around watching the soap operas and talk shows on our dime, we could make the Federal Government the employer of last resort and pay folks a living wage plus benefits to do community service and public works jobs.

  • memzilla Ω

    As we already know, while rich people need more money as an incentive to go to work, poor people need less money as an incentive to go to work.

    Shortbestest summation of Randpublican belief system evah.

  • Oblios_Cap

    If you want to get rich, there are three 8-hour shifts in a day. Stop being lazy bastards.

  • susan_g

    LePhat makes perfect sense. –Chuck Grassley

  • TJ Barke

    Let’s just make the poor as miserable as possible, then they’ll just stop being poor, right?

  • dslindc
    • Eileen Besse


  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Girls, Shifty may talk a good game, but when it comes time to go back to the Big City for another heroin shipment, he’s going to leave you behind. And Smoothie? Same deal.”
    — Preventing Teen Pregnancy the LePage way

  • calliecallie

    Needs moar bootstraps. Or booze traps. Or both.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      Or bear traps? Maybe if we put one outside the Gov house baited with donuts…

  • BosGrl

    On behalf of every kid who spends 8 or more hours locked in a car while their parent is working and without other resources, when help could be available, FUCK YOU, any governor who does this.

    • therblig

      been there, done that. not for 8 hours and not everyday, and sometimes when my mom attended college classes not work. but yeah, fuck them.

      any of my students who email me ahead of time that they have to miss class because their babysitter crapped out, gets marked present.

      i even told one last term that i had no objection to a (reasonably – there are other students) well behaved kid in my class.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        i’ve had two classmates bring their kid to class – i tried to be open minded about it, one kid was a little distracting, but it was fine. The other was perfectly well bheaved, sat in a desk and colored in her colored book while adults talked boring stuff for two hours.

        • Arolpin

          I attended classes with my dad a couple times when he was in Architecture School. Mom had a trial, and I was home sick, so I went to lectures with dad. I know that one class was an art history class, and there were lots of pictures of boobs.

          • Oblios_Cap

            So, educational! Sweet.

          • marxalot

            Running Dad had to take my Idiot Brother with him a few times when he was in night school finishing his BS. Mom was working or I was sick or something, but the Idiot just stayed in the seat next to him and stared at the slides or doodled in a notebook.
            This is the same kid who climbed into Running Dad’s lap while he was studying optics and said “read me, Daddy!”

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Sure, that one guy gets to do Chicken Soup for the Soul and no one complains. I try to feed people with words instead of actual, you know, food, and everyone is upset.”
    — Paul LePage

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “People have criticized my use of this money for in effective after school program instead of something tangible. Buy hey, they wouldn’t let me spend it on chastity belts. So, not my fault!”
    — Paul LePage

  • Baconzgood


    There is Bacon snowman

    I could have done better but I’m on my own this year.

    • Oblios_Cap

      seems pretty well-informed. Too bad he’s a Yankees fan.

      And Baby Jesus is covered in snow!

      • Baconzgood

        It’s like Jung. Yankees are evil. Baby Jesus is nice

    • arglebargle

      Somebody better dig out our Lord and Savior .

      • Like Really Smart Radio

        Maybe they’re there to worship Baconzsnowman.

        • arglebargle


    • msanthropesmr

      Bacon wears a tie?

      • Baconzgood

        I like to.

    • Like Really Smart Radio

      I like Baconz snowman.

    • SDGeoff3

      Nice. And no pants.

      • Baconzgood

        Snow man needs no pants.

    • Hobbes’ like, smart Evil Twin

      I like how the snowman is stabbing the newspaper with his stick hands. I feel pretty stabby myself reading the news these days.

      • Baconzgood

        Snow man is reading….and since he is MY snowman. He’s a SUPER-DUPER LIBRARY COMMIE, that is an observant Catholic

  • SayItWithWookies

    That’s it – I’m starting my own goddamn church. The Goddamn Church of Gimme Yet Fuckin’ Money Because Jesus, LLC.

    • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

      Amen! Where will we meet?

      • mohave rocky

        Upon the heath

    • Jennaratrix

      You’ll never get their money being so open; you have to go stealth like Joel Osteen, call your church something like “Positivity Ministries, Inc.”

  • Martini A, very stable genius

    Well, to be fair, it’s much easier to hold out examples of federal tax dollars wasted when one allows grifting opportunities to organizations that waste federal tax dollars.

    • Bigly smart jesterpunk

      “See, we told you government doesn’t work. We just need to get rid of these programs because the funding isn’t being used for what it’s supposed to be used for.”

  • goonemeritus

    This is very bad news for the Hobo Bean industry.

  • Anna Rompage

    In other words, TANF funds are being used exactly how the block grants the GOP proposes for healthcare will be used, to fund other shit than the original intent…

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    This is a lot less horrifying than what I’ve come to expect from that asshole. I was waiting for something like, “Maine is diverting TANF funds to buy jewelry made of fetal tissue that teenaged girls are then forced to wear at all times.”

  • goonemeritus

    Has anyone ever floated the theory that if you take some more money from rich people they will work hard to replace it?

    • Bigly smart jesterpunk

      It doesn’t work that way for some reason, the rich will refuse to work unless they get all the money.

      • wavicles

        From last month somewhere;
        A Christmas Carol –
        The heartwarming tale of how rich people must be supernaturally terrorized into sharing.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • goonemeritus

    Maine has never recovered from the collapse of the beaver hat industry.

  • Jenny

    Beware of Smoothie and Shifty and their heroin, all you young white womens of Maine.

    Hey look, I’m counseling. Gimme so money now, Maine!

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    hey guys, poverty is a bastard and there’s never going ot be enough money to help everybody, but let’s just fucking START with starving, homless, and helpless kids, mmmkay?

    (Too much GRR too early in the day).

    • yyyaz

      There is actually enough money to help everybody. The sole purpose of the GOP is to make sure it never happens.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        heh, i was thinking that after I posted – but let’s assume things stay the way the are, with “some” taxes going ot help people and the uber rich not giving up 2/3 of their $$.

    • Oblios_Cap

      The day we care about kids as much as we care about animals, I will be proud to be a member of the human race. Until then, not so much.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        i was telling somebody the other day – when I did local news, NOTHING got as many calls and opinions as an animal abuse story. It’s awful and cruel, ABSOLUTELY – but some baby beaten to death within an inch of its laugh, ho hum, starving horses on a farm – ALL THE CALLS! MUCH EMAILZ!!

        I found it weird.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          life, not laugh.

          typo fixed – fucking autocorrect.

          • Lord Jim

            DAMN YOU AUTOCORRECT! :)

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          I turn in trolls on FB. and when I do I have noticed an odd thing, all the shittiest trolls have dog rescue photos on their profiles. As in they seem to be involved in some fashion.

      • Grumpy Twat

        In the UK we have the RSPCA and the NSPCC.
        That’s the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, but it’s only the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.

      • Kateaux

        There was a pioneering child abuse case in New York in 1874 which was pursued by the frakking ASPCA since child abuse laws basically didn’t exist (see Mary Ellen McCormack).

    • Zippy49

      Here in SoCal we have a ladies’ charity called the Assistance League. Their mission is to help needy kids get through school in several ways, from a set of clothing to college scholarships. In our town’s school district (Pop. 300K) there are 900 of these children.

      Ms. Zippy is an active member, and I help out when they need muscle or a truck.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • PubOption

      Why is Pence using the sinister hand?

      • Mentally Stable Ron

        Must be a gang sign.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Good eye, and good question!

    • LiberalANDProud

      “Smell my finger.”

  • cheetojeebus
    • MynameisBlarney

      I had one of these when I was a kid.

    • Fartknocker

      Blake Farenthold made it as Bozo the Clown. With the royalties he can afford to pay for his own sexual harrasment case.

    • Kateaux

      Reminds me of this (which features my favorite TV’s Frank line ever, “Oh, bite me, Frodo!”):

  • yyyaz

    Sorry to go OT, but this fits in with the New Cruelty: “The Trump administration has announced the US will cancel permits allowing nearly 200,000 people from El Salvador to live and work in the country.”

    • SDGeoff3

      Feliz nuevo año.

      • Oblios_Cap

        There’s no place like home! Even when it’s crime-ridden and potentially deadly to go back.

        • SDGeoff3

          Potentially. Mmmm.

          • Oblios_Cap

            Oh, yeah. Those M-13 Guys the GOP gubernatorial candidate kept going on about.

        • Mentally Stable Ron

          And let’s not forget which North American superpower helped make it that way.

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      They are not good looking Eastern European types that could potentially work at one of his trash palaces for low wages, so pfffft

    • MynameisBlarney

      Reason # A-Millionty why that piece of shit needs to be thrown the fuck out of office.

    • Lord Jim

      Between this and the revocation of the DREAM act, is everyone now clear that “immigration reform” is not about protecting the US from lazy, criming invaders, but about Making America White Again?

  • SDGeoff3

    Several years ago on Air America, The Rev. Al Sharpton commented that when jebus said that “the poor will always be with you”, it was not an endorsement of an economic policy. It was a lament.

    • Ray in VT

      But Jesus likes rich people, which is why he makes his chosen rich, right?

  • ManchuCandidate

    Jesus said blessed be the dick heads for they shall reallocate the welfare to philistines.

  • mardam422

    “… “Fair Haven Camps,” got TANF funds to run an after-school class for 17 middle-schoolers who partook in outdoor activities in wilderness survival…”
    Stoopid libtards. Give a man a hamburger and he eats for a minute. Teach a man how to catch his own bugs and he eats bugs forever.
    Stoopid libtards.

  • Lepage was living on the street at like 12, and managed to find business success by being an aggressively hustling bully and ruthless asshole. Rather than having sufficient empathy to feel that nobody should have to run away from abuse and claw their way up at the expense of others, he concludes that his success is a measure of right living and personal value, and if you can’t claw your way to the top of the heap then you should just fuck off and die, or slavishly submit to whatever rich people make you do for whatever crumbs they deign to grant you.

    • Lord Jim

      A sociological found that people who have survived hardship tend to be LESS empathetic with other people going through the same hardship – they feel that since THEY got thru it, others should be able to do the same.

  • Jenny

    Also my mother usually used the TANF payments she received for me to pay the electric bill. That was usually the one bill she actually paid. Mostly because she couldn’t live without TV.

  • JaveyDay

    Total U.S. household wealth is estimated to be $96 trillion* for a population of 323 million. That is an average of $297,000 for every single person in the country.

    Clearly, there’s not enough money to provide food or healthcare to poor and sick kids.

    * This number does not include the tens of trillions the mega-rich have hidden away offshore.

    • yyyaz

      And for any asshole who can’t contemplate life with a net worth of only $999,000,000.00 (one million less than a billion dollars), go wipe your ass with a running vote chainsaw and apply an astringent of gunpowder votes followed by a vote match.

    • Mentally Stable Ron

      Little factoids like this are why people turn into socialists.

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    OT: It’s raw story, so grain of salt, but apparently a judge in their case (the story isn’t specific) was….wait for it…part of the trump transition team:

    In a letter to U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia, lawyers for Fusion GPS argued that Judge Trevor McFadden’s “impartiality might reasonably be questioned” because of his work with the transition team.

    “Member when trump said a latino couldn’t rule on his case, that had nothing ot do with latinos – but only cause trump was, in general and obviously, against Latinos?


    • Lord Jim

      I’m no legal beagle at all, but I would have thought that an honest judge would have voluntarily recused themselves in such a case.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        you’d think – but we live in crazy crazy times.

        • Lord Jim

          Clearly, thinking is getting me nowhere.

          • Dept. of Space Tacos

            drinking, on the other hand…

  • Mavenmaven

    The important thing is that the money goes to White Christian people.

    • wait! what?

      White, succe$$ful Christians. These camps aren’t free. It cleary states in “The Book of Appropriations” that “thou shalt pay a shit ton of money to God’s lobbyist because NOBODY gets to see Christ without paying a fee.”

      To drive this point home, St. Peter has this playing on continuous loop at the Pearly Gates:

  • Christopher Story

    “Just 10 percent of world military spending could knock off poverty”

    So if you double that for food and housing, and triple that for healthcare and education, and that’s still only 60% of the global military budget. We’re paying more to maintain the machinery of war than what it would cost to establish the UBI, universal healthcare, and education.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      FUCK that is depressing. This country has amassed one of the greatest fortunes in world history and we squandered most of it.

      • Lord Jim

        We spend more on military programs than the next eight nations combined. Including China and Russia, the OTHER TWO SUPERPOWERS.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          “ya know, just in case. (oh and it gets us reelected)” – honest republicans

        • Captain Kraut

          Well, that is a factor in why The Rest of the World™ has had some well founded concerns regarding your sanity since well before Trump.

          And why it used to be easy for European leaders to shrug and say “We’ll field a token force but can’t really compete anyway so why bother?”.

    • wait! what?

      An aid package should be put together under the title “Weaponizing the Homeless.” Then, maybe, dollars would be allocated…

    • cheetojeebus

      Sans cannon fodder there’d be more poors to feed.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • reelreeler

    I’d like to say that Paul LePage deserves to be the lowest paid Governor in the country, but I can’t say that he even deserves that much.

    • just_jim

      If he paid Maine for his job, Maine would still have the short end of the stick.

  • elviouslyqueer

    If the Vegan Baby Butthole story ever decides to rear (heh) its tacky head again, LePage’s puckered visage is the only appropriate pic to use.

    • marxalot

      “Cat’s Arse” Le Page

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        Le Rhoid, as in hemmo.

  • rosenbomb

    A spokesperson from the Maine Department of Health and Human Services couldn’t specify to the Bangor Daily News what kind of quality control they have for the programs, how the department chose the programs in the first place, or even a basic question like the number of kids being served by the after-school programs.

    Funny, because Republicans love screaming about accountability. We talk about this in social work– crack-downs on social welfare programs always happen during Republican administrations. You have to prove you are doing something that is helpful…hence a rise in evidence-based interventions. Which can be a great thing, when implemented uniformly and when there is enough money to actually, you know, implement the appropriate interventions.

    Yet, accountability within the administration is strikingly absent.

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      its the alleged reason they got rid of something like $8 or $9 million in pregnancy prevention (non “Keep your knees closed” kind) here in Texas: “there’s no proof it works!”

      Your point, on a larger scale, its hypocritical they claim to be the party of fiscal responisbility, “belt-tightening”, and anti- tax and spend.

      • rosenbomb

        I didn’t even scrape the surface of the hypocrisy evident in the GOP demanding accountability yet ignoring programs with a strong evidence base (related to what you said– we know that abstinence-only sex ed does not work. they still push it). It’s maddening!

      • Lefty Wright

        But didn’t a study show teen pregnancy rates and maternal deaths in Texas increased when they stopped the programs? Sort of back loaded confirmation they never hear because they have their fingers in their ears.

        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          i know its up, but I don’t know about that specific program…and I can’t remember if that was total, or just a nearby region. This was fairly recently, so I doubt those numbers included this move, but then again, it wouldn’t be the first time we cut funds cause supporting sex-having sluts isn’t godly!

          (and I forgot to mention, this program, of course, served poor(er), primarily latino area).

          • Lefty Wright

            Yeah, sometimes it’s hard to pinpoint a specific single factor causing it. I think the analysis actually centered on some action in Texas that cut community health services funding to Planned Parenthood, or abolished the program completely since they could not selectively cut Planned Parenthood out due to opposition from the Obama DHHS. A problem Trump will probably eliminate.

      • Lord Jim

        Here’s a simple, fundamental rule of Republican politics:


        • Dept. of Space Tacos

          it really is and i constantly forget that.

      • kareemachan

        Proof that the TX way doesn’t work? 3rd highest teen pregnancy rate in the US, behind NM and Mississippi.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        Kick backs to the religious right posing as an actual service however is a- ok. We need to cut these scammers off at the trough, and redirect funds to actually help the poor.

    • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

      See, you’ve made a classic error. You’ve assumed that accountability applies equally across the board, when in reality its only for poors, brown peoples, and vagina-havers. And the more of those categories you fall into, the more you need to be held accountable. MATHS.

      • rosenbomb

        Ugh, I forgot! As a vagina-haver myself, I am prone to forgetfulness and stoopid. Because vagina.

        • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

          I understand! I am also the sad bearer of that mysterious orifice; tho fortunately, certain associated parts have shut down production, meaning I am much less prone to making bad decisions involving marginally employed musicians.

    • mike

      Because the dems are the welfare recipients. It was the clintons that coined the term super predator and pushed for 3 strikes. The dems are no friend to the poor. All the urban shitholes, chicago, detroit, cleveland, la, been controlled by dems for decades. They are responsable for you and your “give me free shit, you money grubber!” attitude.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Republicans need to be punched in the dick, repeatedly, with votes or with whatever vote-like hard substance will get their attention.
    This may not change their behavior, but it will make a lot of us feel a lot better.

  • Opalescent Riddles

    Yeah, so, under the GOP “tax reform” Medicaid is going to be replaced with block grants to the states. What could go wrong?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Everything, Katie.

  • Lefty Wright

    Lyin Ryan envisions exactly the same thing with Medicaid block grants. By budgeting a set dollar amount instead of the (very cut rate) reimbursements for all necessary medical care for recipients, it is much easier to gradually cut funds. You don’t have those pesky community health clinics asking why they are not being paid for Ms. Smith’s annual physical. We just give you $100,000 to treat all the poors in your county. All 10,000 of them.

    With the waivers for “similar” uses, expect to see crisis pregnancy clinics popping up on every corner. With the director, a local preacher’s wife, pulling down a $100,000 salary. All diverted from Medicaid funds used for women’s health and contraceptive services Planned Parenthood used to get.

    • Zippy49

      That’s why we all need to donate to PP. We started the day OH announced the diversion.

      • kareemachan

        And the ACLU.

  • Mentally Stable Ron

    ‘health and wellness, social-emotional skills, career readiness and civic engagement.’

  • President in Exile Firefly

    I assume the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can’t Read Good is getting some TANF money.

  • Swampay

    I agree that there’s a feedback loop between poverty, broken homes, more poverty. Things that I think help with that, in order
    Helping people have food, shelter, health care
    Educating people
    Giving kids something to do besides fuck and take drugs
    (about a million other things)
    Telling kids not to fuck and take drugs.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Teaching kids about sex and birth control.

      • Swampay

        Yup, way up there.

      • Bill Diaz

        If your kids are 12 or older and dont know all the intimate details of human reproduction and how it works, you have failed as a parent.

        99% of the people who say they are ‘anti-abortion’ are lying hypocrites. If you want to decrease abortions in this country, you do it by improving sexual education, effective and available birth control and increase funding for support programs for families in need (single parent households).

        Most of them are idiot religious fanatics and are pushing a religious agenda and not at all concerned about ‘children’ or ‘families’.

        Have a great day!

        • Mr. White

          I have an old friend who recently showed up on Facebook. Seems in the past 15 years since we lost contact, he’s turned into a full-on conservative Christian. His hatred of Planned Parenthood is irrational to say the least. I tried having a conversation that Planned Parenthood is more in the business of PREVENTING abortions (sex education, birth control, etc.) and not PROVIDING abortions and my words weren’t even considered. Not a big surprise. Apparently they’re all Satanists and they feed off the life force of aborted fetuses…or some such bullshit.

          • Bill Diaz

            I had a gf from Maine who became a religious fundamentalist right under my nose (infected by her mother, lol). It is funny having someone trying to convince a PhD candidate in molecular biology that ‘Intelligent Design’ isnt a load of crap.

            Suffice it to say our relationship didnt last much longer than that event. I have no problem with people having religious beliefs (both of my wives were met in Maine and were members of established religions), but when your belief interferes with reality, it causes problems.

            Have a great day!

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist
        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist


  • Red Bird

    So many greedy “christians”.

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      Religion is the last refuge of a scoundrel. George Orwell.

  • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

    why would we not shrink the IRS? it’s not like we need to audit these funds and clawback any funds which are being misspent. that would be, like, fiscally conservative and you don’t need to be fiscally conservative with a successful businessman who is, like, really very really very smart, and also too a stable genus.

    • You should ice that burn

      There’s some controversy on the genus of that creature that sits upon his head,, though most experts agree it’s Mustela

      • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

        I don’t believe that is a living creature. a) a living creature could poison him and b) no living creature could survive that much spray tan without Diet Coke. conclusion: it is the corpse of a FiletOFish sandwich that has been up there since his Studio 54 days.

    • Lord Jim

      It’s hilarious, in a sick way, how “fiscal conservatives” have come to idolize a man who started with a large, daddy-provided fortune, and, by dint of profligate incompetence, managed to turn it into a small one.

      • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

        well, why didn’t your daddy pull himself up by his bootstraps to leave you a small fortune? HGGGGNNNHHHH????

  • James

    Flying to America? Why not pick up a U.S. mobile in our Duty Free and save a fortune on call charges?— Stansaid Airport (@StansaidAirport) January 8, 2018

    • phoenix00

      Lemme guess: the ear speaker is at the end of the barrel, and the “hang yo ass up” button is the trigger?

  • Rickyphoo

    How can a usually reliably blue state, (at least in presidential elections), keep electing this teabagger asshole as their governor?

    • kareemachan

      I realize they had their own Hillary/Bernie/Stein thing going on the first time around, but really?

    • Dept. of Space Tacos

      i’ve heard that the hills are alive and they have eyes.

      A friend married a dude with money and they spent a lot of time in maine, it can apparently be very red-necky in portions.

      • Bill Diaz

        Maine is largely a very poor, very rural state. Below the ‘Volvo Line’ (somewhere about Brunswick), it is largely Democratic and liberal, but up in ‘The County’ (Aroostook county, larger than some states), they are prime ‘Trump voters’.

        The funny part is, the people most likely to have voted for the idiot LePage are the ones most likely to be harmed by his policies.

        Have a great day!

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          You summed it up brilliantly Bill. I am from southern Maine and We were all democrats.

        • TheFamilyThalamusPersists

          You are correct sir ( lived in the Bangor area from ’96 to ’04).

      • Mr. White

        Watch a few episodes of North Woods law. LOTS of Maine rednecks who also appear to have that wonderful anti-gubbermint mentality. “What do you mean I can’t shoot a deer from a moving vehicle in a residential area?!? YOU’RE OPPRESSING MY RIGHTS!!!”

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        I’m from there and it does have its share of necks of red, many of whom are dope-smoking ok people. (My cousins come to mind) However they are very easily swayed by emotion as they are trusting souls and a bit naive.

    • James

      Maine has a plurality election. In the last election, an independent lefty ran against Mike Michaud (D), splitting the vote. Paul LePage was awarded the election with a minority of the vote, but the most votes of the three candidates.

      If the independent had not run, and presumably most of those votes had gone to Mr. Michaud then Michaud would now be governor.

      The magic of the purity pony vote.

      • mohave rocky

        Eliot Cutler is far from being a lefty; really more center-right wealthy lawyer. Otherwise, you are correct. It was clear by the election that Cutler could not win but he declined to throw his voters to Michaud. He has a monumental ego. Maine has a lot of Jeebus freaks and even those who disliked LePage had a hard time with the fact that Michaud is openly gay.
        The whole election was a monumental shitstorm and Maine has been stuck with the craziest governor of all for a long time. The previous and popular governors, Angus King (now Senator) and John Baldacci, were both reasonable and sane.

  • janetintexas

    Wow! How can I sign up to get money running a program? If I could get paid $100,000 I would totally run an after-school program for 10 hours a week with the summer off. Of course I’m not related to any state governors or any of their big-money donors, so that might be a problem…

    • mardam422

      I tried that. But my parole agreement stipulates that I stay 500ft from a school. Hard to do if I’m running the school.

      • Beelzebubba

        Check with the DeVos mob – being a criminal is a plus these days.

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          All the in crooks are doing it.

  • Let them eat cake hikes!

  • BreakingDeadMen

    How is this dick still a thing? Don’t they have elections there?

    • dshwa

      In a prequel to the current left wing divide, there were two other candidates who split the opposition vote, allowing Lepage to win with a minorityy of the votes cast.

      • BreakingDeadMen


        • NorthernSaber

          In his first election he garnered a whopping 39% of the electorate. And won. The rest of us bought bumper stickers and shirts with big fucking “61%” decals on them . Then Maine’s huge collection of A.W.L.s (Angry White Losers) voted his ass in again, largely out of racially tinged economic concerns. Sound familiar?

          • BreakingDeadMen

            All Too

      • sarafina

        More than once. The Left does not appear to be educable up there.

  • James Baskin

    Cuz Shifty is in Maine trying to get those girls pregnant!!!

  • Boscoe

    “Why don’t they just ask their dad for a loan?” -Mittenz

    • BJW

      Or they could sell some stock, because that’s what Mittenz did as a “poor” married student!

  • William

    Guess what else Pauly McShithead has been up to?

    • Ellie

      Been planning that for a long time. It’s all part of a pattern. Naxalone just makes them better for their next overdose. Feed a hungry person, and she’ll just get hungry again…and so on and so on.

  • Daniel Hooper

    “Maine Gov. Paul LePage Knows Who Needs The Welfare Money, Surprise It Is Not Poor People!”

    …Wait a minute; that’s not surprising at all! FAKE NEWS! Next you’ll be saying water is wet and Donald Trump is an idiot!

  • LiberalANDProud

    Strange, I was led to believe by Mitt Romney that people would choose to self deport or move if things got tough where they lived. Or are Mainers just ignorant?

  • Anne Of Green Bagels

    Maine voted for him twice. the end.

    • Nephilim
      • Brendan_M

        A third party candidate splitting the vote so he could win with a plurality.

        • sarafina


    • And we can learn from that twice.
      Both times the left and the left squabbled on who should rule, all the while having the majority.
      Yes. Ideology lead to Page. Nothing else

      • Anne Of Green Bagels

        purity ponies are going to get us all killed one day.

        • sarafina

          At least in Maine.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        It was the template for t-rump. Le page is a koch-sucker and the green party split the vote,

    • TheFamilyThalamusPersists

      Glad we bolted well before that election year.

  • Aaron Wise

    Someone should step up to the plate and convince Maine voters that voting for LePage is just not right.


  • Squeegee

    Maine has the second highest rate of public assistance in the country which reflects its older population and many more kids living in poverty than the national average.

    The true rate of poverty in Maine is much higher than the official number when you factor in the cost of living and heat and electricity in the long winter months.

    At the same time Maine voters have a long history of voting into office politicians who have no interest in serving their best interests…probably because the poorer residents have very low vote turnouts

  • psychobroad

    Jesus this crap makes my head want to explode. What is wrong with these people? New Cruelty indeed, except it has a deja-vu-ey feeling about it.

    • Agreed. This is disgusting.
      I cannot even comprehend a so called christian who would willingly grift money out of the literal mouth of babes like this.
      This fucking country

  • Ami

    RepubliKKKlans hate poor people. And Middle Class people- wait until Ryan cuts Medicare and Medicaid. And women- Ending Medicaid payments for Planned Parenthood is coming And immigrants- deportations of DACA kids, Haitians, Nicaraguans,etc.just getting started And… And…And…
    RepubliKKKlans love wealthy corporate donors, no one else.

    • BelmontPublicLibrary

      Wealthy, white, male, corporate donors.
      FTFY ;)

  • chascates

    Look, you’re not impressing your God by being such an asshole to people who have been dealt a bad deal in life.
    Oh wait, maybe you are.

  • BelmontPublicLibrary

    I think we all know that baloney is for the poors. Bologna is the shit that every discerning bigot lunches on! On white bread, of course.

  • SeeTrainWrecked

    “I don’t work this hard so people like you can sit at home and collect free money.” – Paul LePage, to people working three jobs to try to keep their heads above water

  • RC

    Doesn’t Maine have term limits for Gov? If they don’t, they should.

  • Donna Mueller

    he should move to alabama-he’d fit right in!!!!

  • Ghoti theLinguist
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