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zoom in closer and you can see the trench that leads to the thermal port. That’s your target, Luke.

Looks like Donald Trump — or at least Stephen Miller, who channels the “president” when statements over 280 characters are necessary — is not happy with former Majordildo Steve Bannon, who’s quoted as saying all sorts of unkind things about Trumpland in Michael Wolff’s upcoming book Everyone In The White House Smells Like Burning Hair. The White House issued this statement explaining that Steve Bannon was Just Some Guy who used to hang out there:

Steve Bannon has nothing to do with me or my Presidency. When he was fired, he not only lost his job, he lost his mind. Steve was a staffer who worked for me after I had already won the nomination by defeating seventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.

Now that he is on his own, Steve is learning that winning isn’t as easy as I make it look. Steve had very little to do with our historic victory, which was delivered by the forgotten men and women of this country. Yet Steve had everything to do with the loss of a Senate seat in Alabama held for more than thirty years by Republicans. Steve doesn’t represent my base — he’s only in it for himself.

Hahaha, Bannon “had little to do with” Trump’s victory. That’s good! Bannon and Trump, of course, both go back well past Bannon’s official job with the campaign last summer, as Joshua Green detailed in his excellent Devil’s Bargain: Steve Bannon, Donald Trump, and the Storming of the Presidency, which we reviewed here. Bannon was a pet project of the super-rich Mercer family, and once Ted Cruz lost — and thanks to Bannon — so was Trump, who depended on Mercer money to get elected. Trump and Bannon actually met in 2011, if you want to get all technical about it; they were introduced by rightwing dickweasel David Bossie. And before Bannon started getting called “President Bannon,” Trump thought he was a campaign genius, but now, he’s nobody of course.

The statement continues:

Steve pretends to be at war with the media, which he calls the opposition party, yet he spent his time at the White House leaking false information to the media to make himself seem far more important than he was. It is the only thing he does well. Steve was rarely in a one-on-one meeting with me and only pretends to have had influence to fool a few people with no access and no clue, whom he helped write phony books.

We have many great Republican members of Congress and candidates who are very supportive of the Make America Great Again agenda. Like me, they love the United States of America and are helping to finally take our country back and build it up, rather than simply seeking to burn it all down.

Huh! So Bannon did all the leaks? Isn’t that the sort of thing Trump said people should go to jail for? We’ll keep you posted on the upcoming prosecution of Steve Bannon, which should be happening in a short period of time now, maybe two weeks.

The readers of Dead Breitbart’s Home for Perpetual White Fear — helmed by once and present leader Bannon himself! — aren’t at all sure what to make of the news. The site ran two brief stories — each credited only to “Breitbart News” in the byline so no poor Breitbart writer would get doxxed and SWATted — with excerpts taken from the Guardian, and the readership is frightened and anxious to see Daddy Donald fighting Daddy Steve. Most, of course, come down on Trump’s side, because, as reader “Orange_Crush_The _Liberal_Mind,” put it, “I voted for Trump…I didn’t vote for Bannon. I’ll stick with Trump, thanks.”

Others, like “BugBite,” went further and wondered how Bannon could be so disloyal, especially since the whole Trump Tower meeting was a SETUP BY HILLARY CLINTON:

Bannon is really thinking that his carp does not stink and that HE is the KING of it ALL! What is wrong with this guy?

The meeting was NOT “treasonous” stupid maybe, but NOT treasonous! Trump Jr. and Jared had NO idea that they were BEING SET UP by the Clinton camp, which clearly they were. This Russian lawyer is so mixed up with the Clinton’s it is not funny.

Looking for dirt on your opponent is 101.

“Teddi” took comfort in knowing that Michael Wolff is a big fake-news liberal who can’t be trusted, and then found a Gateway Pundit story explaining the whole BOOK is fake because one of the people Wolff quotes — not Bannon — said he’d never said what Wolff quoted him as saying:

Come on folks !

Look up the leftist author who wrote the book (Michael Wolff), look at the leftist rag (Guardian) that broke this at such a “convenient” time to distract.

Smells like deep state and left trying to leak fake news again as the rope tightens on Hillary, FBI, DOJ, Obama actions…

***

Edit: It is fake and I’m pi**ed at Drudge for playing along with this…

“NO DACA JUST MAGA” wants Steve Bannon to quit Breitbart toot sweet:

Bannon is a moron and he should resign from Breitbart immediately. I had my suspicions after he picked Roy Moore over Mo Brooks and now it’s confirmed.

To be honest, I really think that Bannon is a deep state operator who has infilitrated MAGA-land to bring it down from the inside. Just look at his background. Georgetown, Harvard, Goldman Sachs, Hollywood producer (working on projects with the Weinstein’s) and was no where in politics until he stepped in the vacuum at Breitbart after Andrew died.

Yep, Steve Bannon of the DEEP STATE.

Others were certain the whole thing was a Fake News hoax (running on Breitbart, somehow), so they cited what’s almost certainly a fake Twitter account (if this is really Steve Bannon, why would it have only 10 Tweets in its history?):

PROBABLY FAKE

A surprising number — OK, they’re Trump voters; why would they pay attention to little details? — thought Steve Bannon had written the book and was just trying to get rich off his former association with Trump.

And some folks refused to have their faith in either Bannon or Trump shaken:

de Verona
Dumb leftists will fall for anything that gives them hope at this point. The pros are in deep dispair as they know they are being hunted…

Karen
I won’t believe what’s quoted of Bannon from this ‘Book’ until I hear it from him in a live one-on-one interview, otherwise this is most likely made-up and a pay-off from Trump’s enemies.

Danny
LOL, watch the libtards get all excited over this only to be crushed again.

StopIslamofascism
The left are in full retreat now as the story crumbles. Good times. They can go back to tweeting about the Kardashians soon.

Not sure if that last one meant that the story of the as-yet unpublished book has crumbled in the first few hours since the excerpts went online, or the Russia story, which was similarly debunked as soon as it broke.

One guy, who may have been a counter-troll, who can even tell any more, insisted that the White House statement was itself a fake, because it was released to the lying fake media:

Trump would have Tweeted, if he had wanted to clear the air. It’s also NOT Trump’s language. That much is obvious.

You’ll find out soon enough. In the meantime, go back to reading more FakeNews …

If it’s not Donald Trump on Twitter, don’t trust it. Also, if it IS on Twitter and it’s not by Donald Trump, don’t trust it.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to help!

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  • BadKitty904

    That’s no moon…

  • Anne Of Green Bagels
  • memzilla Ω

    Shorter Dolt 45 on Bannon: FAKE MUSE!

  • ((( Augustus )))

    but

    none of their “theories” make any fucking sense

    so… the HRC campaign set all this up? All of it? And then failed to win the presidency?

    …why?

    • BadKitty904

      Forget it, Jake. It’s Republicantown.

      • major_asshole

        Can’t post video on phone, but I remember that musical number from Family Guy…

    • CutterTeam

      Even MORE impressive when you consider that Hillary had Alzheimer’s and dementia at the time.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        and Ebola!

        • CindyinEncinitas

          And rheumatism!

      • WeaselPoo

        And a bad cough and shrill pantsuits

      • Naytch

        And uranium poisoning!

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      HRC has been the Mr. Big behind everything since 1993

    • GoutMachine

      REASONS!

      Same mental gymnastics it takes to believe that Obama is a Machiavellian mastermind and a newbie dilettante at the same time.

      • ((( Augustus )))

        jews are servile, disgusting, subhuman filth

        and also terrifying supermen who rule the world

        • arglebargle

          And the Mexicans are so lazy they keep taking all the jobs. ALL OF THEM!

        • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

          Schrodinger’s List?

    • Asterix

      Your brain will explode if you try to understand their “theories”. Don’t do it, just drink and kill your liver like the rest of us.

    • Daniel

      You have to stop before you get to the “why” part.

    • CindyinEncinitas

      Because they’re that evil.

    • Manders

      It’s always amused me that the HRC is simultaneously capably of doing All the Evil and unable to achieve what she really wants.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Just like Bamz!

    • arglebargle

      How are you going to take down Trump if he doesn’t win? Duh.

  • CutterTeam

    I, for one, am enjoying the fuck out of Infrastructure Week.

    • Monsieur_Grumpe

      Make America Grate Again!!!!1!

    • WeaselPoo

      ROFL!

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Burn those bridges!!!

      • dieselox

        “We will burn those bridges when the time comes!!!”

  • anon_the_great

    Village Idiot lashes out at the Ass he rode in on

  • BadKitty904

    I read that as “Now that he is on his own, Steve is learning that whining isn’t as easy as I make it look.

    I still think my version’s correct.

  • tehbaddr

    It’s a New Year’s Miracle! Deleted Comments on a , um Wed. right Wed!

  • ArgieBargie

    Poor Brietbartarians. They just now realizing their days as useful dildos are long gone. And just like Bannon, all they can do is scream as they being packed into a box and sent back to Dumbfuckistan.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Now they’re just idiots

  • Crystalclear12

    Has anyone checked on Hillary?
    Made sure she hasn’t laughed herself to death?

  • lowenufc

    Bannon’s carp does not stink. It is outside in the pond, taken care of by a loving gardener, and since it outside, Bannon never sees the carp.

    • Manders

      That typo made me LOL a whole bunch.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Actually, Bannon’s carp was outside in the hot tub and it dissolved into a gooey blob sitting on the bottom…

    • Msgr_MΩment

      The carp prefers it that way, to be fair.

    • Daniel

      Bannon’s is the only carp that’s never been accused of being koi.

      • The Wanderer

        What you have done, I see it.

    • Rickyphoo

      Damn, you beat me to it.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    So none of the supergenius commenters ar Brainfart has bothered wondering why, if it’s fake news and all made up by libtards and the deep state, hasn’t Steve Bannon- the guy who runs Brainfart and could easily put out an article- done so and denied saying those things?

    • ((( Augustus )))

      right lol

      fucking brain trust over there

    • ArgieBargie

      Also, if it is FAKE NEWS!!1! indeed, how come the White House was so quick to respond to Bannon’s comments?

  • doktorzoom

    Whoops, last line got chopped. Fixed!

    • CindyinEncinitas

      Noooo! I like cliffhangers!

    • anon_the_great

      I thought the transmission had been interrupted. Troubling, but not unexpected.

    • Eileen Besse

      Thank you!

    • tehbaddr

      So you added “too!”?

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • jesterpunk

      “But I said you cant look into my crimes, its not faaaaaaaiiiiiirrrrr”

      • MynameisBlarney

        “I even used the Jedi Mind Trick and everything!”

    • BadKitty904

      “But…but…but I’m white!”

      • Carpe Vagenda

        You know, I feel that there’s something very much like that going on right now.

      • Seek

        And rich, don’t forget rich.

        • BadKitty904

          Well, for the time being…

          • Seek

            None of which will save him from the Polonium Poisoning if he doesn’t get this under control. He knows who to fear and it ain’t Mueller.

      • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

        Yes, this is unprecedented in trumps amerikkka.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      the stench of desperation is worse than the smell of that rotting carp

      • Carpe Vagenda

        The carp rots from where the head is embedded.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Zoom in closer and you can see the trench that leads to the thermal port. That’s your target, Luke.

    We are not worthy.

  • BadKitty904

    THUNDERDERP! Two fat, sweaty bigots enter, one fat, sweaty bigot leaves.

    • (((fka_donnie_d))), SOB

      Not necessarily

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Boo. Do not want. Two fat, sweaty bigots enter, it turns out to be Bannon’s old biodome and not set to unlock until 2035.

      • Teecha

        Maybe just never unlock?

    • The Wanderer

      American Sumo: The Fattening

  • jesterpunk

    Steve Bannon has nothing to do with me or my Presidency. When he was fired, he not only lost his job, he lost his mind. Steve was a staffer who worked for me after I had already won the nomination by defeating seventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.

    https://twitter.com/realdonaldtrump/status/898870621584596993

    https://twitter.com/realdonaldtrump/status/898964640817983488

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      There really is a Trump tweet for every occasion.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      FAKE!!!!!!1!!!!!!!

    • SterWonk

      A new voice… at the place he used to run?

  • anon_the_great

    Ah, so THIS is why Teh Scooch was rubbin’ his anals around the past few news cycles.

    (News Cycles. Is that even a thing anymore? Doesn’t feel like it.)

    • ((( Augustus )))

      sure they are, it’s easy to figure out:

      just divide the old cycle duration by ∞

      it’s a trivial calculation from there, really, the solution just falls right out

      • anon_the_great

        I like dropping the answer into an Improbability Drive and see where I end up

  • John Hollingsworth

    Don’t these libtards know that Twitter is OWNED by known libtards? Even Donald Trump’s tweets can be faked. Everything is #fakeNews! Trust NOTHING!!!

    • BadKitty904

      Mulder? Is that you?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Bannon is The Dick Smoking Man.

  • Resistor Radio

    Whether or not Steve Bannon’s carp stinks really depends on how long it’s been sitting in the boat.

    (That typo made me smile way more than it should have, and PS this is not a threat)

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/af04b3cd4c0fb377098c640aa6b8f09e6bfd400f26c74b940d14b2ef0bfc84ce.jpg

  • tehbaddr

    “I had already won the nomination by defeating seventeen candidates, often described as the most Insane Clown Car ever assembled in the Republican party.” FTFY

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Insane Clown Car Posse- the Derpalos

      • tehbaddr

        Elections! How do they fucking work?

  • Indiepalin

    Why does Bannon want to burn down America?

    • GoutMachine

      For the lolz.

    • ArgieBargie

      Some men just like to watch the world burn.

    • CindyinEncinitas

      He’s cold?

    • anon_the_great

      Can’t create, so they just destroy
      ‘Come on, let’s set someone’s dog on fire’

      -DK

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      He’s a self-proclaimed anarchist.

  • memzilla Ω

    All of this butthurt over at Breitbart’s Home for the Chronically Unemployable?
    . https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/33ed156ea4ff6f8d80f960eaa2d222b8841b116b26f0c83700c1710ef9a26380.jpg

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Scat! Get äwäy from mi sister!

  • goonemeritus

    We are never this mean to Rebecca.

    • Resistor Radio

      To be fair, though, she’s not always trying to suck her own cock.

    • jesterpunk

      Thats because we have a lot of very nice people here and also comments are not allowed.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Donna Rose, The Ruler Of All Things, would have none of that sort of nonsense.

  • Daniel

    “To be honest, I really think that Bannon is a deep state operator who has infilitrated MAGA-land to bring it down from the inside.”

    How wonderfully this encapsulates their mindset- the moment you disagree you become a member of the conspiracy and have always been so.

    These people use Nineteen Eighty-Four as a shrill cry against “political correctness” and the left. It’d be nice if they’d read it.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I hear Bannon is dating Hillary. This goes deep, people!

      • Resistor Radio

        That’s what she said!

        • Notreelyhelping

          Or not.

        • tehbaddr

          Eeeewwww No! Just No! Bannon’s pustule covered thingy!

          • Resistor Radio

            I’m so sorry, “goes deep” prompted my “that’s what she said” reflex, I hadn’t considered the larger (or smaller, disease ridden) implications.

          • Daniel

            That’s what she said!

          • tehbaddr

            You are forgiven, this time.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        WE’RE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS!

    • DrBigHead

      I’m beginning to think Bannon may actually be Andy Kaufman

      • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

        That would make a certain amount of sense, actually.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I think they’re more like Fahrenheit 451 sorts myself.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    When he was fired, he not only lost his job, he lost his mind

    It was fun watching Sarah Huckabee Sanders dance her way around the question she got from a reporter about that. Can’t remember the exact wording but it was to the effect of “Why, if he lost his mind then, did Donald continue to converse with him?”

    Never did get an answer to that one. Hee hee hee…

  • goonemeritus

    Is there nothing that the deep State can’t fix?

    • arglebargle

      Stupid?

  • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

    Smells like deep state and left trying to leak fake news again as the rope tightens on Hillary, FBI, DOJ, Obama actions…

    HAHAHA! OMG they really do believe this don’t they?

    Bless their hearts.

  • Teecha

    I sometimes wonder if this is real. Any of it.

    How can the shit that’s happening all over the world possibly be happening? It’s 2017 for fucks sake. We have watches that we can talk to. Our fridges can make shopping lists for us. We send spaceships out to look at the farthest edges of our solar system. We can talk to anyone in the world and see their face- and for free! This is the fucking future. And yet we are surrounded by idiots, fucking nazis are influencing people in power, Russia is somehow not the enemy despite not being v nice, terrible people are being given inportant jobs despite their terribleness and possibly because of their incompetence, people with real jobs have to go to food banks and to top the fucker off, there is a distinct possibility of a nuclear war.

    Surely I’m dreaming.

    • GoutMachine

      Let me take you down
      ‘Cause I’m going to Strawberry Fields
      Nothing is real
      And nothing to get hung about
      Strawberry Fields forever

      • Teecha

        If I was back in England, I might find something to find those relaxing fields with. Here… well, it’s not a chance I’d like to take.

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      Short answer? We can thank 63 million morons for all this.

      • Teecha

        It’s so much worse than that. It really is.

        It’s worldwide.

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          I blame Rupert Murdoch and his dumb things down, media empire of misinformation

    • proudgrampa

      Uh. It’s happening because it’s 2018, not 2017. ;-)

      • Teecha

        Oops. Until I’ve managed to write the correct year on my white board for a week in a row, I’m making that mistake. I don’t go back to work til Sunday…

        • proudgrampa

          That’s OK. I keep doing it wrong on my checks… Usually don’t get it right until about June.

          • Teecha

            I was about to be surprised that you still write cheques. And then I remembered that chip and pin is new and exciting on many parts of America. At least according to my mate who was there last year.

            I can’t remember the last time I used a cheque. At least 5 years ago.

          • proudgrampa

            I don’t write them that often, but they do have their uses.

    • JMP

      Fucking old white people, that’s how it’s happening.

      • Grumpy Twat

        As a fairly fucking old white person I have to admit to being as baffled as everyone else.

        • weighmaster

          Me too.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      News media doing the whole “Both Sides” BS.

      Also too, news media glorifying the dumbest portion of the electorate like they were the new sages of politics. You know who: the ‘Undecides’. Because being a uninformed dipshit is just so cool, right?

  • OT: I have a snow day tomorrow! Yay!

  • Monsieur_Grumpe

    I went to the Breitbart site (I need a shower) and I swear my monitor was bleeding.
    *joy*
    *schadenfreude*

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Trump Jr. and Jared had NO idea that they were BEING SET UP by the Clinton camp, which clearly they were.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/042f95b248360b3b25270ffb53a30c6cb7c6de536119527ad38af8afad2c0aac.jpg

  • Johnny Norris

    Silly question. Why is the Bannon-run Breitbart running a straight news story about what this Wolff goofball wrote in what is sure to be a shitty book (he is a really bad writer) about what Wolff said Bannon said, but yet as of 3:15 central there is nothing on the Bannon-run Breitbart about whether Bannon actually said these things? Is Bannon not returning Bannon’s calls?

    • AJ Milne

      Well, if I were Bannon, _I’d_ avoid any association with me.

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      Malkovich?

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      GMTA

  • Maybe someone should go over and ask the Breitbart kids to look into seeing if more flights have been passing over Bannon’s house lately. The Deep State likes to get people with the chemtrails, you know?

  • Michael Smith

    Their articles always have like 3800 comments but I think at least 85% of them are from bots.

    I went over there today and said something. I got three likes. I think it was from liberal trolls, but I still felt dirty.

    • MynameisBlarney

      I was gonna go over there and troll, but I just couldn’t really be bothered.

    • canes_pugnaces

      I commented once and was banned for life, when I suggested reading BB comments was better than Sunday morning cartoons.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        I’ve been banned twice now

        • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

          My hero!

      • DrBigHead

        Touchy, much?

      • Rebel Scum with permit

        This used to be popular with Conservapedia haters- post from a public place, and get banned. Then no one else could post using that ISP. As I’m pretty net illiterate, I’m not sure if that still works.

  • jesterpunk

    OT but glad no one was hurt.

    http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/fire-breaks-bill-hillary-clinton-westchester-home-article-1.3735597

    A fire broke out at Bill and Hillary Clinton’s remote Westchester home on Wednesday afternoon, officials said.

    It was not immediately clear if the Clintons were at their longtime Chappaqua residence when the fire erupted just before 3 p.m. Firefighters were able to quickly extinguish the blaze, authorities said.

    A spokesman for the New Castle police department confirmed to the Daily News that no injuries had been reported. He noted that the fire was called in by someone who was at the home at 2:51 p.m.

    • Raan

      Here’s hoping it was just a kitchen fire or a fireplace throwing off an ember.

      • jesterpunk

        Also it depends which house, they just bought the neighbors house last year to build a bigger house on that property. So if it was the new house it may not be so bad even if it was a bigger fire.

      • Tetman Callis

        It was an overheated server (not one of the staff).

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Apparently, they dropped a lit bong after reading D45’s essay.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        Okay Roger, you can sleep on the couch one more week and then you have to get a job and your own place.

  • JMP

    That statement is not only too long and coherent for Donnie, but barely contains any Improper Capitalization – only doing so with “Make America Great Again” – and no idiotic uses of quotation marks for “emphasis”. It’s obvious he couldn’t have written it.

  • canes_pugnaces

    This is just a shadow things to come as people start abandoning the orange pustule.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Yup, it’s the first wave of rats leaving the sinking ship

      • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

        “I never supported Trump! I know you did, you filthy liar!”

  • JoeChristmas

    Covfefe is a powerful drug.

  • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

    Watching these idiots reinforce their bunker mentality is something to behold. Pretty soon, it’s gonna be like “The Thing” and every one of them is going to spend every waking moment with a gun covering the others.

    • Covering? More like a round of survivor, as each one decides the others are … straying.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    The left are in full retreat now as the story crumbles. Good times. They can go back to tweeting about the Kardashians soon.

    Yeah, I’ve never tweeted about the Kardashians and never will (IDK why the fuck anyone finds them interesting), but thanks for playing, wingnut!

    • ((( Augustus )))

      they really do understand everything so clearly, don’t they?

      never a misplaced statement, never a disordered strategy

      and their plans are always flawlessly executed, it’s a marvel

      a well-oiled machine, indeed

  • William
  • gallbladder

    I can’t get past the caption for the lead fotopicture.

  • WeaselPoo

    Let’s imagine for a second that Wolff’s book is 95% exaggeration, hearsay, conjectur and fantasy presented as factual by him and his sources.

    It still doesn’t obviate the provable, fucking obvious that Trump is essentially insane, ignorant, stupid, narcissistic, puerile vindictive and a Russian stooge because of it.
    It doesn’t refute that he is significantly financed by Russian oligarchs, or that he’s making money from being President nor that his entire administration is compromised.
    If 95% of this book is bullshit, it does not render all the other evidence that makes Wolff’s book believeable, as unbelievable. It is not the pillar upon which the many cases against Trump’s treasonous crime syndicate which includes much of the GOP as well, stands.

  • Oblios_Cap

    At least that one person realized that the “trump Tweet” was too close to literate to have been written by trump.

  • JMP

    “Just look at his background. Georgetown, Harvard, Goldman Sachs, Hollywood producer (working on projects with the Weinstein’s)”

    Did anyone tell this idiot that Georgetown is a Jesuit school, and doesn’t actually fit the obvious anti-Semitic insinuation that he’s trying to make?

    • Chyron HR

      The “G” in Georgetown is for “Joo”.

      • ((( Augustus )))

        i got a good chuckle out of it, thanks

    • Raan

      I didn’t know Georgetown was a Jesuit school.

    • Daniel

      With the Weinstein’s what?

      Why do xenophobes have such poor English?

    • Michael Smith

      Well, even if it isn’t Jewish, its still a school, which is bad.

      • Oblios_Cap

        Education is for idiots!

    • GoutMachine

      It’s those deep cover Jesuit Joos. They’re so crafty they’ve infiltrated the Vatican! Taking it down from the inside!

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        The pathetic thing is that they really do believe this. There are enormous threads investigating the “truth” about ((( Pope Francis ))) from the brilliant sleuths who made “Justin Judeau” a meme.

  • Michael Smith

    The right isn’t in full retreat because they don’t actually understand anything that happens, but still, soon they will be back to cranking one out while playing COD.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Denial is a disqus thread on Bitpart not just a river in Egypt.

  • goonemeritus

    I don’t remember Obama having weeks like this. But then to be fair Hitler didn’t have more than a couple of weeks this bad.

  • Fartknocker

    I suspect the Wonkette computer cloud is filling up with all sorts of “Dear Shit Fer Brains” content for Doc to wade through. Sad, because this website doesn’t allow comments. In fact, StopIslamoFacism sounds familiar.

    • jesterpunk

      Didnt they make it to a previous DSFB?

      • Fartknocker

        It sounds very familiar to me. But we have has as many SFBs as the Jolly Green Giant has beans.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    Zoom in closer, Dok?

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      That little caption was the most humorous thing I read all day. Bravo, Dok!

  • Notreelyhelping

    “McConnell hates Bannon! He’ll love me for this!”

  • GreenGoldSharpie

    Does this mean Bannon might collect Trump’s tiny orange balls for his trophy room and destroy this entire administration?

    I detest this asshole, but bring in the wrecking ball, says I!

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
  • TimResistit
  • GunToting[Redacted]

    Very effective use of the Mariah Defense.

  • James Baskin

    ” It’s also NOT Trump’s language.” Bereft of Covfefes.

  • ArgieBargie

    “The left are in full retreat now as the story crumbles. Good times. They can go back to tweeting about the Kardashians soon.”

    Yes, this is exactly what we do all day.

    • GoutMachine

      About who, now?

      • WotsAllThisThen

        OJ Simpson defense team.

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      Exhibit A that they’ve never actually met anyone from “Teh Left”.

    • MynameisBlarney

      I mean, sure, we talk about them a bit I guess.
      But mostly we talk about the Borg, or the Klingons…and we always post those funny “Shut up Wesly!” memes.

      What’s that?

      Kardashians NOT Cardassians you say?

      Fine!

    • ManchuCandidate

      Hahahahaha

    • JMP

      Yeah, in my experience most lefties spend our days making fun of people who care about the Kardassians.

      • ArgieBargie

        The irony is that they are the ones actually worshiping a Reality TV famewhore.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      I thought we just told dick jokes all day?

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Kardashian dick jokes.

        • Canned Covfefe

          Eeeee-eewwwwww

    • WotsAllThisThen

      It’s been a hot topic ever since the Setlik III massacre and the occupation of Bajor in general. But now is not the time for the Federation to make recklessly provocative subspace communications.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Bajor for Bajorans!

    • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

      I’ve never knowingly watched anything that bills itself as “reality TV.”

  • Tetman Callis

    “[S]eventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party”.

    Ladies and gentlemen and any and all others, may I present to you the new, gold-plated, MAGA-fied definition of “the dregs.”

  • Crystalclear12

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. . .
    damn peed a little
    Hahahahaha

  • Wuulf
    • kareemachan

      LOVE the cat on the left’s attitude…..

      • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

        The No Fucks Feline.

      • Thiazin Red

        Cat on the right is just how one of mine would act. Scoffing down something he can’t even digest, food stuck to him, rubbing his face all over it like he wants it to be his friend.

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        “404: Fucks not found.”

  • WeaselPoo

    Until I read Chris Cilliza’s hot take on this latest shenanigans so i can sagely agree with it, i have no comment.

    • jesterpunk

      Cillizza will blame Hillary somehow.

    • Edith Prickly

      WHY HASN’T HILLARY COMMENTED YET?

  • WotsAllThisThen

    I admire the way Bannon et al can call something fake news without actually denying it.

    • TimResistit

      I admire how he can call something fake news and not bite his own dick.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Practice.

    • jesterpunk

      They have already established that “fake news” means anything they dont like. It is the definition Trump had when he invented the word “fake”.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I can’t even read the comments below until I get this off my chest: Michael Wolff’s upcoming book Everyone In The White House Smells Like Burning Hair. made me LOL so hard the dogs all jumped up and started barking. Well done as usual, Dok!

  • mailman27

    I gotta agree with that last guy, that there’s no way Trump wrote that press release. Too much proper English, syntax, etc. Otherwise, they can all just step in a vacuum and take their carp with them.

    • CripesAmighty

      Stephen Miller. Bank on it.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Boy. Things will be tense at the trailer park tonight.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Good thing this happened after all of the holiday dinners!

    • TimResistit

      There is a great disturbance in the redneck force.

    • Earl Of Sammich

      I hear meth futures are way up.

    • Oblios_Cap

      I hope they’re all ready to employ their beloved Second Amendment remedies.
      With votes, of course.

    • Steve-o

      Quick…. to the Breitbart forums to gloat of drinking conservative/repub tears!

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    Michael Wolff wrote the dossier- you heard it here first!

    • Carpe Vagenda

      That’s the bizarre part of this. Michael Wolff is a craven what’s wrong with journalism today 101 asshole who’s wedged so far up Trump’s colon that he’s got unchewed filet o’ fish in his hair. The knives are definitely out if Wolff is going after him now.

  • mrFawkes

    It must be the most confusing of days for the howler monkey brigade over at Breitbart. A bit like choosing dog shit ice cream over dog shit frozen yogurt.

    • BadKitty904

      And the opioids don’t help.

      • Steve-o

        Oooooh ouch, that was a nasty zinger!

  • memzilla Ω

    I’m not saying that Year One of Dolt 45 has driven me to drink, I’ll just say that I wrote an addendum in the Organ Donor box on my driver’s license: “DON’T WASTE YOUR TIME TAKING THE LIVER.”

    • bluicebank

      In other news, liquor store robberies are up. But not for the cash. Merchants are now resorting to sitting down with the robber and drinking the inventory.

    • exinkwretch

      In the immortal words of Dr. Hawkeye Pierce, “When I croak they’re gonna have to beat my liver to death with a stick!”

    • arundel

      The onslaught of the Trump regime has totally driven me into the arms of the Cabernet Sauvignon Blanc duchy and dictatorship. At least there I feel protected from reality.

  • Shelli Kae

    I’m sure with a straight face Trump typed out he beat out who some say “Was the most qualified Republican field of nominees ever” and then telling Bannon winning isn’t as easy as he (Trump) makes it look. Anyone else made to type this out would have been struck by lightening cause God is getting good & tired of Trump’s shit!

  • jesterpunk

    So this is an actual comment over on dead Breitbart.

    Since Bannon doesn’t represent our views anymore will he be leaving Breitbart for CNN or does he plan to stick around and try and ruin The President?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      But. They backed someone they believed to be a pedophile because Bannon insisted that he had to win the primary over the guy Trump backed because otherwise it would give aid and comfort to Trump’s accusers who say he’s got consent issues?

      • jesterpunk

        They also said they backed the pedophile because if they didnt it would make Trump look bad and people would believe his accusors.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Right, but they backed him in the first place against the guy Trump wanted. If it hadn’t been for Bannon, Moore would never have been associated with Trump to begin with.

  • Wuulf

    You know that tonight DOTUS will be blaming Obama for not vetting Bannon… https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/3a559c9472c2240a80bec0383e56752335b6e261cbf988ae654d58588997fc11.gif

  • OrdinaryJoe

    “Steve Bannon has nothing to do with me or my Presidency. When he was fired…”

    Nobody seems to have picked up on this. When did his resignation become a firing? They were so careful to make it “not fired” and now this blows the cover off. Somebody has to ask Chuckles about this at the presser tomorrow.

  • La forza del resistino

    It’ll be ‘her emails, Huma and pedophiliac pizza joints’ by Friday.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Deep State! Uranium!

  • CatDog

    Hey, you can use your disqus account to go and troll these brightfart morans right now (although it’s pretty slow because every libtard in the universe is already at it). I am currently questioning a self-professed expert on the intricacies of ‘alt-right theology’.

    • Grumpy Twat

      There is, indeed, some Grade-A trolling going on over there.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Ever notice that none of the trolls who come over here are smart enough to even halfway imitate a liberal point of view?*

        *That – or some of us here have *never* broken character.

  • kindness

    It is hard to believe that most the diseased over at Breitbart can actually vote.

    • jesterpunk

      Russians are not supposed to vote in US elections.

  • bluicebank

    “Steve had very little to do with our historic victory, which was delivered by the forgotten men and women of this country.”

    Hey man, just because we unfriended them and cut them out of our wills, doesn’t mean we forgot them. We’ll remember them with the anger of a thousand suns.

    • Daniel

      We can’t forget them- the lying media is full of interviews with the brave, tear streaked little things.

      • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

        Those stories are forever to be known as “Cletus Safaris.”

  • BadKitty904
    • proudgrampa

      SQUEEEE!

      Those are so cute! What are they?

      • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

        Real life Dr. Seuss characters?

        • BadKitty904

          The Loraxi…

          • proudgrampa

            Ha!

          • tehbaddr

            THE LORAX: 2020 !!! Don’t forget it you heathen !!!111!!!!!!11!!!1

      • Notreelyhelping

        John Bolton and his missus.

        • proudgrampa

          LOL. You really are not helping! ;-)

        • DrBigHead

          I have had a mustache since 1977. MsBigHead has never seen me without it. It is beginning to turn grey. If it goes white, I am shaving it immediately.

      • BadKitty904

        lol Emperor tamarins…

        • proudgrampa

          Thanks, Kitty! I’ve never seen them before.

          • BadKitty904

            They’re pretty adorable.

        • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

          A lot cuter than Emperor Mandarin. (Orange, that is.)

      • Carpe Vagenda

        omg they’re zebra loraxes!

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      LORAX 2020 – AS YOU ARE JUST AS CONFUSED!!!!!!!

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Utterly OT but if you suddenly get a “downfist” that’s me, accidentally. I’m having Disqus troubles again, including jumpy screen, 3-tries-and-you’re-still-out upfists, and partial comments posting and having to be edited.
    Sigh.
    Otherwise, it’s a fucking awesome day, ain’t it?

    • OutOfOrbit

      i never seen a downvote here before i donut know where they keep’em

    • PubOption

      I haven’t had any comments only partially post, but everything else has happened today.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Jesus Christ, what awful “people.” There isn’t a Thunderdome big enough to fit in all these subhuman infected ass carbuncles.

  • OrG

    Wow, and we thought these idiots were confused before this.

  • jesterpunk

    I just looked at the deplorable sub on reddit.They are trying to convince themselves that Bannon said Jr committed treason to get the media talking about Hillary and Obama somehow?

    http://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/lol_ricky_gervais.gif

    • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

      Their logic does not resemble earth logic.

      • jesterpunk

        I am just enjoying it because its great watching them attack each other. It also stops them from attacking anyone else.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      lolwut?

      • jesterpunk

        Ok the “logic” is something like this. Bannon said Jr committed treason so the media talks about it then Mueller indicts and impeaches Hillary for treason. I really dont know how it works and it doesnt make much sense.

        • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

          They’re REALLY desperate for Hillary, aren’t they?

          • jesterpunk

            Yes they really are.

        • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

          Ok, but when does Morgan Fairchild become this dude’s girlfriend? Or has she been all this time?

          • weighmaster

            After he sees her naked?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I know these words. But they make no sense.

      • jesterpunk

        IKR?

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸
  • Electric Ukulele Land

    It’s like a Mexican standoff of stupid…

    • Notreelyhelping

      “…but you have to ask yourself: did he fire six shots or only five?”
      “Six.”
      “Sure, but you have to ask yourself.”
      “Sorry.”

  • Um…wasn’t Bannon on drumpf’s National Security Council?

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      very much, lol

    • Lance Thrustwell

      You liberals and your treasonous “memories”!

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      He was just the notetaker.

    • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

      So?? They needed coffee!

      • Khavrinen

        They needed coffee covfefe!

    • DrBigHead

      Not officially, I believe, but he attended all the meetings. So de facto, yes he was.

    • BadKitty904

      But just as decoration…

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Is this the scene where Trump walks over to Bannon, grabs him in a hug, kisses his check and whispers to him “You’re dead to me?”

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I was just sitting here reflecting on how much finer my life was when all I knew about Dumpy was that he was a failed real-estate developer who for some reason had a feud going with Jon Stewart, and that he had some kind of “reality” show on the teevee machine. I had no idea to whom he was married or how many children he had, and I liked it that way. Then he started down that escalator and the whole fucking thing turned to shit.
    Jon Stewart, why you leave us when the story was just starting? WAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

    • (Nasty Girl) Brianna #RESIST

      I’m firmly convinced that if Jon Stewart had kept his show, Hillary would be President.

    • Khavrinen

      Once again I say, I regret that I have but one up-vote to give for this non-comment. Imagine how much better this world could have been, if all the reporters ( from any media ) had decided to ignore Trump from the start, instead of milking every batshit crazy thing he said/did for all the ratings they could get.

      • Paperless Tiger

        Who could have imagined that ‘this guy is nuts’ would be taken as an endorsement?

      • Cosmic Owl 2

        Taking his Nazi rallies live, FFS.

        No other candidate enjoyed so much free press.

    • Edith Prickly

      Right? I long for the days when I could ignore his tawdry shenanigans.

  • Suse

    Ivanka called “dumb as a brick” in the book. I love it.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Well, one parent is Dumpy and the other one was the first immigrant dumb enough to take a job no American wanted, so . . . .

      • Suse

        All of them are so fucking dense, except Barron, probably, but he’s got his own problems.

        • Cosmic Owl 2

          Tiffany may turn out to be the brightest of all.

          • Suse

            Well, she did do that tacky Instagram thing with Ivanka the other day.

          • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

            s2.quickmeme.com/img/ce/ce95bef30f0fe1b77135991cac5dfb3c402688c5d18f0cfa90d467ab901ca9c2.jpg

          • Meccalopolis

            True but it didn’t take a genius to stay far away from this shitshow

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻
  • Lance Thrustwell

    This whole thing needs a new coinage. Let’s see – it’s gossip, and it’s conspiracy theory. Conspiracy gossip? Gosspiracy?

    • Marion in Savannah

      Nice neologism. It works for me.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        My logisms are frequently neo {waggles eyebrows}, if you know what I mean.*

        *I don’t.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      MoDoism?

  • WomanInThePersistence

    That picture. Ugh. Just……ugh.

    • Cosmic Owl 2

      The man is a walking skin disease.

      • MynameisBlarney

        He looks like a fart made ambulatory.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I would actually describe him as “a festering bag of communicable diseases wrapped in a vaguely humanoid skin suit”, but we all have our own descriptions.

        • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

          Something something, the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in phlegmatic snots.

      • Steve-o

        A pimple on the ass of society.

    • doktorzoom

      As that one ST:TNG alien said, “Ugly bag of mostly pus.”

      • The Wanderer

        I think you misheard it, Dok, but I’ll accept “pus.” After all, we’re talking about Bannon.

      • SterWonk

        The actual quote was “Ugly bags of mostly water.” But your version is a far more accurate description of the subject at hand.

        • doktorzoom

          It was a highly intelligent being, and it looked right at Bannon. I retract nothing.

  • La forza del resistino

    call your GOP congress critter at 202-225-3121 and ask if they will lay the points and take Trump in the 4th quarter or are they taking the Bannon underdog points.

  • Marion in Savannah

    OT but… Having had a yuge success with my German red cabbage I’m now venturing into Sauerbraten. It’s burbling away in a slow oven as I type, and the house is starting to smell the way houses should when there’s FUCKING SNOW ON THE GROUND.

    And we still have enough red cabbage to serve with it, and potatoes. I decided that this was NOT the day for Mr. MinS to embark upon his spaetzle venture.

    Fingers crossed that it tastes as good as it’s starting to smell.

    • BadKitty904

      No Brunswick stew?

      • Marion in Savannah

        Alas, I almost never see a squirrel in my yard. (They are cute, and I’d feed them peanuts, but they just don’t show up.)

    • eyelashviper

      I saw photos today of snow on the streets there….a bad thing.

      • Marion in Savannah

        The temp is now about 31, so I don’t think it’s going to hang around for long. But there are some morans who, having no idea how to do it, are trying to drive in snowy/icy conditions. We’re staying inside.

        • William

          *sigh* If ONLY the temp here in Maine would get up into the thirties.

        • eyelashviper

          It is supposed to be 24 here tonite in La Florida, and it sucks.
          All my sub tropical plants are toast, and we had to cover outside spigots, etc. And our outside heater/ac unit froze…joy, joy

          • Natalie Au Natural Hedonist

            Crap, I better cover my banana trees.

        • Marion in Savannah

          Well, that was the high for the day. Temps are headed back down, so that means that all the snow that may have turned slushy in the “warmth” will now freeze solid. I pity anybody in town who actually has to drive to work tomorrow morning. It will be a fucking disastrous nightmare.

    • Suse

      With gingersnap gravy?

      • Marion in Savannah

        But of course!

      • William

        Heathen!

    • DrBigHead

      Mmmmm,. I assume you are making ginger snap gravy as well?

      EDIT: Should have read down, but ginger snap gravy deserves two mentions.

    • The KGB Ate Our Votes

      You must try beef rouladen next! Round steak rolls smeared with dijon mustard and filled with bacon,onions, carrots and a pickle and slow cooked in beef broth.

      • Marion in Savannah

        YUMMMMY.

      • Meccalopolis

        I could see that with walnuts

        • Vacuous Virgina

          Leave John McCain out of this 😵😵😵

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I got a dirt cheap organic turkey after the holidays. I broke it down, roasted the bones, and have an amazing turkey stock simmering. Gonna roast the legs on some stuffing. It’s going to be awesome.

      • Canned Covfefe

        I think leftovers are the sole purpose of turkey.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          I’m totally excited to have a leftover turkey sandwich. Dark meat, cranberry sauce, stuffing on sourdough.

    • William

      My grandparents were German. My dad made hard cider. He’d drain off a gallon when it was fermenting. When it was somewhere between hard cider and vinegar is what he used for Sauerbraten. Goes great with warm rye bread.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Christmas isn’t Christmas without Pfeffernuessen.

        • Meccalopolis

          My father in law from bomberg used to send us lebkuchen from nurnberg every year.

      • Marion in Savannah

        OOOOHHH… I’ve got some cider in the fridge. It’s not fermenting, but prolly mixed with some cider vinegar (which I always have on hand) I could come up with something close. Next sauerbraten I’m a try this!

      • Zippy49

        Madame Zippy made 20 loaves of Weihnachts Stollen this year, that’s Xmas for us. Not to mention for several friends!

        • Marion in Savannah

          Mr. MinS has his grandmother’s recipe for stollen. We used to bake it to bring to the Christmas dinner for the lonely/homeless at our church in NYC. It was close to Yorkville, “Germantown,” in Manhattan and we’d get many older German ladies. They tasted his stollen and some of them started to cry, saying it was just like their mother’s. I still start to cry when I remember how they spontaneously started to sing “Stille Nacht” at their table, and the carol spread from table to table. Stollen can be magic.

          • Meccalopolis

            That’s a great story!

          • Zippy49

            That’s a great story. Every woman I’ve ever lived with made Stollen, starting with my Oma and Mutti who spent WWII in Berlin. Mutti always said Madame Zippy made it best.

            I tear up when I imagine what it took to get an orange in those dark days. Now we have all kinds of backyard citrus (although the Eureka lemons always ripen too late).

    • La forza del resistino

      Careful,too much German cooking smells and you’ll attract the Red Army looking for the Reichstag.

      • Marion in Savannah

        Down here I’m just using those smells to keep the folks like the Huckabees away. Y’all ain’t gonna smell no squirrel stew ’round here!

        • La forza del resistino

          Guten Appetit! Mahlzeit! Would pay to hear that with a southern accent.

          • Marion in Savannah

            Sorry — I’ve lived in Germany so I’d be able to pronounce it properly. My next door neighbors however… THAT would amuse you no end I’m sure!

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      Everyone in the White House Smells Like a Sour Kraut

      • H0mer0

        Teutonic libelz!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      NOT WATERING! NOT WATERING! YOU’RE MOUTH IS WATERING!

    • Beelzebubba

      I just set in a store of whale oil and walrus blubber. Should weather the storm quite comfortably.

    • Canned Covfefe

      I was well into this Aroma fantasy when suddenly stink bug stink wafted across the room. Why?! How?!. No one moved. No one threatened said stinker. And yet…

  • BigCSouthside

    I just re-read the white house statement and it hit me: They didnt actually deny anything in the book.

    • Cosmic Owl 2

      Just the usual boasting from the moron.

  • Rebel Scum with permit

    So if Kelly was running such a “tight ship”, why was Wolff wandering around interviewing present and former White House staff up until October?

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Notice: Ben Garrison’s new cartoon is so non-ironically unfunny it shall not be spewed forth upon your faces.

    • Marion in Savannah

      So — same as all the other cartoons he’s ever created? (And don’t think I don’t remember what you subjected us to on NYE…)

      • Spotts1701, Porg Wrangler

        Skwerl’s on *the list*, huh?

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Be nice or I swear to God I will poast it!

        • Marion in Savannah

          DON’T YOU DARE, YOU MONSTER!!!

          • Canned Covfefe

            Who’s sending Skwerl the canned clams?

          • Marion in Savannah

            If he posts a Garrison cartoon it may very well be me. He’s been warned…

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      I don’t need to see it because I can visualize it- it’s got a swamp, or sewer, or some kind of muck, with the heads of Comey, Mueller, Hillary, et al, sticking out. Trump is above all, looking 40 years younger, and decked out as a super hero. Everything and everyone is labeled, because his audience is dim.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        His hair is drawn like a bicorne hat.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Garrison will also shoehorn in an image of Hillz being led away in shackles, and for this reason there will be a small Garrison-DNA stain on the canvas.

    • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

      Oh no. He drew “The Big Button,” didn’t he?!

  • tehbaddr

    Any “Coherent Statement” from the WH is certainly not the Dotards doing. Dumb Fucker can barely string together some Carnival Barker cadence without changing the topic 5 times!

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      Covfeferent statements, on the other hand…

  • eyelashviper

    Someone managed to get a photo out of the Offal Office, showing the emergency meeting with the Hoofwanker and his best people, all trying todeal with the Bannon and book stuff.

    http://www.sickchirpse.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Hieronymus-Bosch-.jpg

    • The Wanderer

      That’s just pure Bosch.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        It’s from a Hieronymus source.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Breaking: Manafort is suing Robert Mueller because he is finding crimes: http://www.cnn.com/2018/01/03/politics/manafort-lawsuit-robert-mueller-authority/index.html

    • Edith Prickly

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA good luck with that, Paulie Numbnuts.

    • jesterpunk
    • Paperless Tiger

      He must have gotten another big payoff.

    • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

      what court did he file in? (please make it a loser-pay state.)

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        DC District.

        • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

          damn. not loser-pay. that tends to be a redstate thing that when they turn blue or purple is not a priority to remove. oh, well.

          • teapartyidiots

            Trump has appointed three judges in the DC circuit though. Everyone else is a Clinton or Obama appointee. Pray.

          • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

            circuit courts are for appeals. this would be the initial filing and I don’t think that the federal district court would hear that type of case.

          • teapartyidiots

            I meant the district court – no matter though, it went to an Obama appointee.

          • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

            they’re arguing that Mueller can’t prosecute on charges unrelated to the special investigation that he runs across in the course of the investigation and that because the failure to disclose the funds from a foreign government happened before Trump announced his bid for president that Mueller doesn’t have standing. it’ll get thrown out.

    • BillEGoatSmirk

      Yeah, that’s a good plan. Burn through attorneys fees for a legal hail Mary. Did he notice that Mueller has a forfeiture action against most of his assets? And that all of the banks he defrauded in NY will attach the scraps that are left?

      • Ms.Moon

        Manafort is paying his lawyers so if he wants to pay for those billable hours more power to him. This is not going to go anyplace but his lawyers are going to try all sorts of interesting maneuvers and get paid huge amounts of money for the attempts.

  • Edith Prickly

    These ultramaroons are going to make their own heads explode. Sheesh.

  • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

    is there something about using possessives in place of plurals that I’m missing? did apostrophes somehow become anti-Semitic?

    • doktorzoom

      The Ankh-Morpork Guild of Greengrocer’s has been alerted.

    • gallbladder

      Grammar is the work of the Devil.

      • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

        it is not. prescriptive grammar is.

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      I guess Nazi parentheses are so last year?

  • GreenGoldSharpie

    So, this is what it looks like when two villains come to blows and we’re all in the middle, huh?

    • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

      and I thought all the fun would be watching Karl Rove destroy Steve Bannon and Mucus at the same time. this is so much better…at least as long as the other button on Trump’s desk only brings him a Diet Pepsi.

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        No Pepsi, Coke! Cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger…

        • Bell the Blind Tiger MCD

          you mean the second button is for a Big Mac or a Filet O’ Fish?

          • Lordpnut

            Royale…with cheese.

        • Meccalopolis

          It was pepsi

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻
    • JMP
  • Nockular cavity

    Holy moly, that White House statement. This just in: Junior High girls of the world released a statement saying they were appalled by the cattiness of the White House statement, and that they rejected “any attempt to compare us to those losers, OMG are you KIDDING?!?”

  • The Wanderer

    I love it, I love it! It’s the pre-match for the big Super Gay-weight title fight! Okay, Trump and Bannon, wipe away the pre-come and retire to your respective corners!

    • Resistor Radio Coffee Achiever

      Do we have any popcorn left?

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      I think more like this
      https://youtu.be/buErXPRZjc4

      • Canned Covfefe

        Except minions are cute and funny.

    • RMKH

      Time to bring back Celebrity Death Match!

  • Bigby

    Yeah, it’s their universal ‘tell’. To be in their sheeplike tribe, you must agree “Fake News = Doubleplusungood Thoughtcrime”. I can’t even imagine being in that little world. But which “Fake News” shouter to believe? Their heads be getting sploady!

    If I saw video of rescued children coming out of the pizzagate basement I’d be “bye assholes, enjoy jail for life, I’m sorry I supported some of your political ideas, and you’re dead to me now”. Brightfartians, told it was ‘Fake News’ by Cheeto Benito, would assure me that Soros doctored the tapes and it was all lies, then happily pull the straight R ticket just to “show us libtards, hurr durr”. Jesus, they get smaller every day and they were already nanoscopic to begin with!

    • Lordpnut

      “Cheeto Benito”. Nice.

  • The KGB Ate Our Votes

    If, like me, you listened to Hannity’s afternoon drive program you would understand why these right wing nutters are absolutely convinced that Mueller’s investigation is a bust-out and Hillary is going to jail this year for buying a dossier from Russia and selling all of our uranium to Vlad.

    • gallbladder

      Hello, Dog!

      • The KGB Ate Our Votes

        BLAD!! <>

      • The KGB Ate Our Votes

        On my way out the door — have a great night. :)

        • gallbladder

          Will do. Take care. Send Bast my regards if you see her around!

    • Rebel Scum with permit

      Because you wouldn’t for a minute stop to think “ Why would anything Hillary Clinton, a private citizen, did, be national news?”

      • The KGB Ate Our Votes

        And you certainly wouldn’t think, “Our current president wants to use the department of justice to lock up his political opponents? Isn’t that like fascism?”

      • Beelzebubba

        “Because you wouldn’t for a minute stop to think” pretty much captures the not-so-Breitbart mentality.

    • La forza del resistino

      and the South will rise again after that little setback at Gettysburg.

  • Edith Prickly

    I am LOLing till my sides hurt that the lunatic asylum Bannon cultivated at Breitbart is now turning on him. Enjoy your populist revolution, you white-trash Machiavelli.

    • Anne Of Green Bagels

      it’s in the bible. if you dig a fake news hole for others, you’ll fall into it yourself.

      • Boscoe

        Too bad “christians” never read that shit.

    • Pisto75666

      They’re going all Mariah Carey “I don’t know her” on him. Delicious!

  • pstokk

    So when do R Congresscritters start to defect?
    It’s ironic that they’re trying so hard to kill Obamacare and now they’ll be in their own death spiral – the more that defect the more likely that others will too.

    • Roadstergal

      They’re rolling back regulations en masse with all of this cover, and making their donors even richer. Why defect? It’s going great.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Hell, they’re done already. They’ll spend the year campaigning and passing CRs at the last minute.

    • puredog

      They are already retiring en masse. My take is that, having passed the tax bill, they are running to the private sector to take advantage of it.

  • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!

    I am gonna have such a Shadenfreude hangover tomorrow.

  • La forza del resistino

    Donald asks can’t we get back to talking about my yooge button? it works, you know.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Maybe the biggest button in history, people say!

  • teapartyidiots

    The only correct comment is that the statement reads like that little dweeb Miller wrote it (Proper use of whom and all).

    • Paperless Tiger

      It’s like a PSA. “We are not seeking to burn it all down, not us.”

    • puredog

      Except, NOT proper use of “whom.” But could still be Miller, since the Dotard is unaware of the existence of the word “whom” whether used correctly or not.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Is he the dweeb who once called Trump “pluperfect?”

      • teapartyidiots

        The very same.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Don, why so tense?

    • Sophia

      Not enough !!!!! and CAPS for trump to have written it

    • UnsaltedSinner
  • Beelzebubba

    Interesting that they do, after all, recognize Il Douche’s infantile language on sight.

  • Mavenmaven

    Aside from all the other craziness in Trump’s statement, is this the first time in USA history that a president dispensed with even the illusion of being the president of all citizens and not just his political party?

    • Marion in Savannah

      Yes. SASQ.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Nope. Matthew Dowd, Rove’s numbers guy (who is now cosplaying as a warmhearted moderate and dating Maria Shriver) had this whole epiphany where there were no gains in the center so it was best to ignore them and just throw red meat to the beasts.

  • andyshelt

    There’s only one way to settle this “whose the biggest asshole?” contest.

    Two men enter. One man leaves.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmRAiUPdRjk

    • RMKH

      Ladies and gentlemen, dyin’ time is here!

    • natoslug

      I’m confused. Do they both enter the same asshole at the same time, their own assholes, or each others’ asshole? Nobody’s ever explained the “biggest asshole” tournie to me fully.

      • Boscoe

        I picture it as sort of a human centipede, where each link in the chain is trying to chew their way up to the front.

    • Pisto75666
    • Canned Covfefe

      Um, is it against non-commenting rule to ask if anyone has to leave?

  • gingerland62

    “often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.” is
    my favorite line.
    He is a parody of himself.

  • GHERKINS du RESISTANCE!
    • Boscoe

      That… may be the best thing I’ve ever seen…

  • Joshua Norton

    Bannon taught wingnuts that they could be shit-flinging howler monkeys and still be loved by large swaths of America. It’s romantic, really.

  • Electric Ukulele Land

    Begun the Derp Civil War has

  • Ωbjectifier

    My carp may stink, but I have a cute herring.

    • natoslug

      I’m floundering for a response to that.

      • Beelzebubba

        Just thinking about it gives me a haddock.

      • Doug Langley

        Oh, he’s just punning for the halibut.

    • covfefesumgame0005

      while my sturgeon was redding my x-rays she said I had a really purty pituitary gland!

    • thixotropic jerk

      Imma mullet over m’kay, but cod you let minnow when you clam up?

  • Joshua Norton

    We are only 3 days into 2018 and it’s 2017 turned up to 11.

    • teele

      Binge watched Season 4 of “Dark Mirror” this weekend, and my new motto is “Monkey needs a hug.”

  • Lazy Media

    Just run everything through the Trump translator and it will all make more sense:

    If he says he had nothing to do with something, it was his main obsessive occupation for a long time.
    If he takes credit for something, someone else did it.
    If he accuses someone of something, he has been doing that very thing on a regular basis.
    If he says “believe me,” everything that just came out of his mouth is a lie, including the prepositions and articles.

    • Lazy Media

      Example: when Trump says he has a bigger button and it WORKS, that means he has a micro-penis and is impotent. Take it to the bank.

  • major_asshole

    That last bit made me laugh. The statement can’t be real because it’s “NOT his language?” Did you even read the statement? It reads just like the Shitgibbon-in-Chief speaks!

    (Also, kudos to my phone’s autocorrect for fixing “shitgibbon” into “Shitgibbon-in-Chief.” You’re learning, young Padawan.)

    • Boscoe

      Actually, I have to disagree. That statement had way too much polish and structure to be genuine Drumph. Though I’m pretty sure he contributed to the line about “he not only lost his job, he lost his mind”

      • H0mer0

        hmm, reminds me of a Rolling Stones song…

  • Reximus
    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      She jests, but I read a quote from a Trump supporter who claims Trump is the hardest working president in recent history and he doesn’t sleep until noon and golf every weekend like the last guy.

      Irony is dead.

      • Lord Jim

        Imma say, George Boosh-Boosh is gonna be pissed for not getting the nod, after that “faith-based initiatives” and all.

      • H0mer0

        at least Yogi Bear had every picnic basket in Jellystone Park before it was dark.

      • theCryptofishist

        She’s getting her information on presidential work habits from early 20th century Jim Crow postcards! At least she didn’t use the word “lazy.”

    • Snowbound Ron

      It’s true. Indeed, no person in HISTORY has ‘defended’ Christianity the way Donnie has. Any more defending of this nature and it will disappear from the Earth.

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

    Bannon looks like something Luke Skywalker would milk.

    • Marion in Savannah

      I can’t begin to list how many ways that hits my EWWWWW meter.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        My work is done!

    • Boscoe

      That scene was udderly unnecessary.

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        Oh, I could go on about unnecessary scenes. SPOILERS! The shot after Luke takes the lightsaber from Rey? AAARGH! The “on hold”
        scene? AAAAARGH!

        • Boscoe

          Right?

      • WIDTAP

        Teets or GTFO.

        • Boscoe

          …but hopefully with less gruesome closeups of the dribbling…

      • Jimh

        Can’t he just milk them with his mind, remotely, and spare the audience?

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Han Solo might say, “And I thought he smelled bad on the outside!”

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        Ha!

    • theCryptofishist

      Ewwww! Who the fuck would drink Bannon milk? Even if it were actual milk instead of what Harvey Weinstein fertilizes his plants with?

  • Boscoe

    I have to admit it is hilarious watching clustered paranoiacs turning on each other.

  • VirginiaHighFiber

    Can’t we skip over 2018 until November? This shit show isn’t even good. It needs more Gohmert. That’s one person who would be good to watch getting eaten by his own.

    • Anne Of Green Bagels

      with a side of asparagus.

  • Blackest Noobs

    “then i kicked her in the pussy!”

    why yes, i did just watched Dave Chapelle’s Netflix special, why do you ask?

  • WIDTAP

    “Bannon is really thinking that his carp does not stink”

    Smells fishy to me.

  • Joshua Norton

    Have they come up with a way to blame Obama yet?

  • Anne Of Green Bagels

    carp diem as the old folks used to say.

    • TundraGrifter

      Eat a fish a day? Why?

      • TheStrayGoose

        Beats hell out of eating a well-done cow with ketchup every day.

        • therblig

          don’t talk about melania that way. just because it’s not your kink.

          • Vacuous Virgina

            U bad 😘😘😘

        • TundraGrifter

          It’s not “red” meat if it’s well done.

    • marshlc

      C’est la vie, it goes to show you never can tell.

  • CeeQ

    Best day ever

    • Meccalopolis

      I suppose an indictment would be too much to ask?

  • thixotropic jerk

    “I had already won the nomination by defeating seventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.”

    LOL True if by “most talented field” you mean “clown car of idjuts.”

    BTW- if you can stomach the filth, Brightfarts is brimming absolutely brimming with enough schadenfreude/#WINNING! to stock your snark pantry for YEARS to come, bwaahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!!

    • Snowbound Ron

      There is a certain enjoyment watching them snipe at each other, while a few try to convince themselves that WE’RE the ones whose hopes and dreams are being shattered.

      • theCryptofishist

        Always projections. Always.
        Thank you, St. Villago.

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    … I had already won the nomination by defeating seventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.

    Talented. Yes. That’s the word we kept using.

    • mary5920

      I’m trying to remember who they all were now but as I recall very few people thought they were the most talented field ever assembled. There was one woman I think because they needed a replacement for crazy eyes Bachmann in the cycle.

      • CafeenMan

        The lady with the talent of bankrupting a company that was extremely successful before she became CEO.

        • mary5920

          Ah yes, Carly Fiorina. She was getting some coverage for awhile because Dump insulted her.
          Then Chris Christie trashed sweaty Rubio for using the same canned language and he got some coverage, but they always went back to Dump.
          JEB! looked so dull and listless, it appeared he might dissolve into a puddle on stage.
          Undertaker apprentice Cruz got some attention but they always went back to Dump.

      • wavicles

        Please clap, fetus video, water bottle, asleep at stage right, bridge lanes, Lindsey,…

  • Rooster Cogburn105

    Wingnut Willie has 2 Daddies

  • Apple Scruff

    You know what? If a pissing match between Steve Bannon and President Dotard keeps him too preoccupied to start a nuclear war, I’ll happily proclaim myself #TeamBannon.

  • bluicebank

    This is becoming a regular ceremony at the White House.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5c2etjMl3WM

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Jesus….how many fucking guys to fetch coffee did the Trump administration hire?

    • SDGeoff3

      AOT,K.

      • theCryptofishist

        Who the fuck was drinking all that coffee?

        Oh, yeah…

        … the pee hookers.

  • TundraGrifter

    “often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.”

    I’d say the set of candidates in 1860 had the 2016 motley crew beat hollow.

  • “To be honest, I really think that Bannon is a deep state operator”

    Holy shit…is everybody a deep state operator? They’re coming out of the woodwork. I just can’t be… what? Hold on. The missus is trying to tell me something. What? The cat is a deep state operator?!

    Fuck

    Actually, given that she just tried to jump on the bed and missed, I’m thinking she’s more of a derp state operator.

    • Yep, it turns out George Soros and the Deep State employ around 7 billion people to take down the Trump administration.

      • Including the Guardian. I have an amaze. So wheres my cheque from DS then (no btc, ta) ?

        • wavicles

          Wait, what? They told me this had to be pro bono.

          • Peripatetic Poltroon

            Ha ha, silly. Soros pays all us liberals to be liberal. There appear to be issues with disbursement, but that’s to be expected.

          • Vacuous Virgina

            More like pro boner 😎😎😎

    • CafeenMan

      Is it even “deep state” any more if everyone is part of it?

      • wavicles

        There is no bottom.

        • theCryptofishist

          Turtles all the way down. Just like the senate.

    • Duke

      I am!

      And I get a check for posting. Every damn day!

    • Lordpnut

      I just read A SCANNER DARKLY and now realize that I am a deep state operative. Sadly, it appears that my deep state operating skills suck. What a bummer…

      • wavicles

        You just haven’t been ‘activated’ yet. you’re so deep undercover that you’ve covered it all up. Go out and get in a fight and see if you Jason Bourne the shit outta somebody.

        • Lordpnut

          Still not activated. The meter maid just kicked my ass.

          • wavicles

            Huh? Maybe you need to get shot in the back first.

          • Lordpnut

            Good idea. I’ll go light a bag of poo on fire at a cop’s doorstep and run away.

  • This cartoonishly vicious, deranged shit-stirring would be more entertaining if it were happening on a pro wrestling show instead of in the White House.

    • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

      It’s like being on a plane and learning that the pilot is Hunter S. Thompson and he’s racked out on LSD and mescaline while trying to land in a stiff crosswind.

      • rocktonsam

        I’d still take my chances with H.S.T. landing that plane then this soon to be train wreck.

        • Nigel R. Toppinglift, III

          Concur.

        • Zyxomma

          than, not then. But I agree.

      • theCryptofishist

        Heh, heh, heh, “stiff.”

    • phoenix00
  • mary5920

    Kermit Roosevelt was in the deep state, and a nasty crew has done their deep state nasty deeds for years, overthrowing legitimate democracies.
    These buffoons wouldn’t know about that, and will continue to blame all the consequences of their own poor judgment on someone else.

  • Jon Sussex

    Trump picked Bannon to be the Counselor to the President of the United States and White House Chief Strategist. Yet, Bannon spent his time “leaking false information to the media to make himself seem far more important than he was. It is the only thing he does well.” What does that say about your judgment and political acumen Trump?

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    Bannon’s carp doesn’t stink? He has a pet fish?

    • theCryptofishist

      Fish Liebullz! None of my fellow pisceans would be caught dead floating at the top of Bannon’s bowl.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    This is better than Wrestling. Two old, overweight chumps trying to rev up the marks for a grudge match. He’s got a chair! Ref, he’s got a folding chair!!!”

    This time no Face, just two Heels.

    • theCryptofishist

      Steve Bannon has something face-like. In an oozing sore sort of way.

  • mardam422

    Are there gonna be enough buses for Trump to throw everyone under? We should start calling this the Greyhound Presidency.

    • rubikcube

      More than Evel Knevil could jump.

    • theCryptofishist

      The fine people at Van Hool have put in an extra shift to be sure of it.

  • rubikcube

    Scaramucci was right. I guess Bannon finally managed to suck his own cock!

  • Mike Minden

    Sadly, it appears this won’t split the Rs. The posts on Dimfart are apparently running heavily in favor of Trump. I suppose their lack of loyalty to Bannon is no surprise – but it is disappointing.

  • Duke

    Let them eat each other. Good god.

    And let the Dems not parallel this by trying to out-left each other or think that it’s time for a hard-left agenda. We need to control the government to correct Trump’s idiocies and begin to move progressively, again.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I keep thinking we’re going to fuck things up in 2020 by going full Libtard. I’d like to see an adult like Adam Schiff get elected.

  • Shibusa
    • Vacuous Virgina

      And a tRumpkin in a pear tree 😇😇😇

  • Brian Loudermilch

    Two Insane Howler Monkeys throwing shit at each other.
    Fighting over the painfully limited attention span of Morons and Village Idiots.

    • Delu

      I can’t tell if those 2 are Bannon and Trump or Trump and Kim Jong Un.

      Whichever it is, Trump is an insane Howler Monkey throwing shit.

      • theCryptofishist

        Insane primate liebullzzzzz~~~!!!!!11MAGA

  • Ilgattomorte

    Don’t you people understand? Nothing can be trusted. It is all fake recordings of fake interviews, that gets fake reported, by fake news people, faking the fake accounts of fake fakers, who are faking in an absolute state of flakiness.

    The only thing you can trust is that which you feel in your testicles (I’m sorry ladies, but you can’t trust anything). My left nut tells me that Trump is speaking the truth and my right ball just wants to make America great again. And, they should know. They kind of look like Trump. They’re orange, bloated and they have a fantastic comb-over with the consistency of newly harvested hay.

    I’m telling you people. You just have to trust in my balls.

    • VirGinYa

      Your button is bigger, too.

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        Is Trump’s button an innie or an outie?🙊🤭

    • wavicles

      Toss in a ‘believe me’ at the end and you make hook some folks.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      From my ass to your ear

    • handyhippie65

      hate to bust yer balls rather than trust them, but mine are looking to crawl up inside me and hide till some basis for reality returns to life. i’m gonna miss them. i didn’t even get to say good bye.

  • starfanglednut

    That statement, gah. Every time I think I won’t be shocked at the next display of thin-skinned grandiosity, I prove myself wrong. I just can’t get used to it. My brain can’t do it.

  • theCryptofishist

    “… (if this is really Steve Bannon, why would it have only 10 Tweets in its history?)… ” probably been too busy sucking his own cock.
    Yes, I’m sure it’s been said on this thread before, but stale dick joke are okay.

    • Vacuous Virgina

      We believe in recycling 😂😂😂

  • Herewegoagain

    a beautiful relationship has gone off the boil !

    The Bitchfight is on Bannon rattled old Humpy-Bumpy – who can dished it out , but can’t take it !
    …….
    President Trumps’s lawyers sent a cease-and-desist letter to former White House chief strategist Stephe Bannon Wednesday ordering him to refrain from making “disparaging statement” about Trump and his family, according to a new report.
    ABC News reports the letter, from Trump attorney Charles Harder, accuses Bannon of breaching a non-disclosure agreement signed as part of working on Trump’s campaign.

    “You have breached the Agreement by, among other things, communicating with author Michael Wolff about Mr. Trump, his family members, and the Company [the Trump campaign], disclosing Confidential Information to Mr. Wolff, and making disparaging statements and in some cases outright defamatory statements to Mr. Wolff about Mr. Trump, his family members,” Harder wrote, according to ABC News.
    The letter to Bannon also states that “remedies for your breach of the agreement include but are not limited to monetary damages.”

    • Rooster Cogburn105

      When it comes to a trial, try our firm of Faster, Bigger, and Harder, Attorneys at Law!

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Didn’t see this and duplicated it. Sorry.

    • SadDemInTex

      Monetary damages AND you lick the poop off of 45 after every bathroom visit for a year.

  • persistently_resistant_gayby

    This is just so beautiful *chefs kiss*

    So beautiful… sniff

  • clairence

    Trump keeps talking about the ‘forgotten people’ who helped elect him. Has anyone looked into how many dead people voted for him?

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Living dead or dead dead?

  • The Librarian

    Love the feud between Trumpsky and President Bannon. Long may it run.

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    Could someone in the MSM ask SHS what persons or entities refer to the GOP slate as “the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party?” Frankly, that’s a low bar, but still, I’d like to see some names.

    • phoenix00

      I think the piece of slate has more talent than the whole of the GOP.

    • Grumpy Twat

      It would also be interesting to see the ones who didn’t even make it on to that list.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      I think maybe the real comment was “the most people ever to inhabit a political clown car.” Cheeto just didn’t remember it exactly.

  • And, now we know why Mitch was smiling.

  • willi0000000

    seventeen candidates, often described as the most talented field ever assembled in the Republican party.

    that’s a relief . . . there’s hope . . . NOW DON’T FUCK IT UP DEMOCRATS!

    the pugs have handed you so much ammunition in the last two years . . . if you don’t keep their stink in everybody’s nose from now until election day . . . 24/7 . . . 50 state strategy . . . all the way to the bottom of the ballot!

    [ if a republican runs unopposed anywhere in 2018, heads should roll ]

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      Deep bench, shallow gene pool.

  • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

    Let the games begin!🤣

    Trump attorney sends Bannon cease and desist letter over ‘disparaging’ comments
    “Trump attorney Charles J. Harder of the firm Harder Mirell & Abrams LLP, said in a statement, “This law firm represents President Donald J. Trump and Donald J. Trump for President, Inc. On behalf of our clients, legal notice was issued today to Stephen K. Bannon, that his actions of communicating with author Michael Wolff regarding an upcoming book give rise to numerous legal claims including defamation by libel and slander, and breach of his written confidentiality and non-disparagement agreement with our clients. Legal action is imminent.”

    http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-attorney-sends-bannon-cease-desist-letter-disparaging/story?id=52128555

    • Trump’s lawyers don’t seem to understand how law works. Weird

      • sarafina

        That’s what happens when your lawyers graduate from the Cracker Jack School of Caramel Popcorn and Peanuts.

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        Not surprising though. It makes them look good to their client. And he signs the checks. A little humiliation is a small price.

  • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

    I love how quickly these people turn on each other like rabid teacup poodles. Zero loyalty among crazies.

    • sarafina

      Well, the left is no better, i.e. Al Franken.

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        Al messed up for real. Maybe the sentence was harsh, but it wasn’t for no good reason.

  • Herewegoagain

    It was Bannon that helped this idiot Trump to grab power in the US ,the far-right authoritarian conformity are certainly split now between Donald , who a huckster by trade, a phony con man looking to make an easy buck and a history of cheating and lying, that poor clown is cracking under the strain. His mental health was poor already, but the stress of this office is causing a slow motion meltdown.

  • SadDemInTex

    How can Bannon “cease and desist” when he’s not doing the action. These are comments he made while still in the WH. Wouldn’t it make more sense to sue Wolff?

    • Espadron

      some crack legal team they got going there,

      • Damian L

        Only the best people.

  • Tragic Typos

    We are all deep-statists, now.

  • Belasaurius

    I am going to need all the popcorns

  • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

    The Deep State must be awfully friggin’ deep, because it sure enough is jam-packed with folks.

    This all brings to mind the old saying about how the Good Lord must truly love assholes, or else he wouldn’t have made so many of them.

    But then, nowadays everything brings that old saying to mind.

  • SqueakyRat

    King Derelict vs Big Button! Yay!

  • MamaBrown

    “winning isn’t as easy as I make it look”?? I have been reduced to open mouthed gawping. Like some kind of tropical fish.

  • Uley Blue

    WHO WROTE THAT PICTURE TITLE?!! Because I’m British and I want to recommend her/him for at least a knighthood…

  • 1complexmolecule

    Gotta watch out for those carp.

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