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LOCK HIM UP

House Oversight Committee ranking member Democratic Rep. Elijah Cummings sent his committee chairman, Trey Gowdy (R-Benghazi), a weird letter on Wednesday. It tells the story of a whistleblower who came forward to spill the beans about what in the hell disgraced literal actual foreign agent Michael Flynn was up to around the inauguration. Apparently he was chomping at the bit to get rid of Russian sanctions RIGHT THE FUCK THEN, and was guaranteeing to anyone who would listen that they would be “ripped up” as soon as Trump was officially president. Why? Well, for one thing, it seems like there is a quid pro quo between Trump and the Russians that involves lifting sanctions in exchange for the Russians’ help installing a friendly, incompetent, greedy, probably criminal pussgrabber in the Oval Office. And of course, Michael Flynn had been working a grift before the election with a company called ACU Strategic Partners to enrich himself and his Russian pals, by enacting a “Marshall Plan” in the Middle East that involved building “proliferation-proof” nuclear reactors. (And who would get the leftover uraniums out of this deal, which could then be used to make nukes? That’s right, it is Russia, LOCK HER UP, LOCK HER UP!)

In the letter, Cummings demands Gowdy get off his ass and subpoena the White House for Flynn documents from this time, noting that Gowdy’s earlier excuse — that he didn’t want to do anything that would interfere with Robert Mueller’s investigation — is now invalid, because Cummings held back information about this whistleblower at Mueller’s request, and he’s releasing it now because Mueller fuckin’ said he could, because Mueller is already finished investigating this shit. What did Mueller find? That’s for Mueller to know and the Trump White House to find out!

Let’s look at the letter, then after that we will go down a wormhole into the hell of Just Asking Questions (your favorite!):

Literally, on Inauguration Day, Flynn was texting folks like “KA-CHING! Who’s ready to get rich pretending to be a public servant? LOLOLOL!”

The whistleblower says that day in January he met Alex Copson, the managing partner of ACU Strategic Partners. Copson, according to Cummings’s letter, was sporting a grifting boner so raging he could have used it to pole vault through the Reflecting Pool:

He was so excited! And Michael Flynn was literally texting him during Trump’s grotesque Inaugural speech to say he was excited too!

To recap, these are the damning quotes from Copson so far:

  • “This is the start of something I have been working on for years, and we are good to go.”
  • He “just got this text message” from Michael Flynn about how their project is “good to go,” and please tell all the other boys to “put things in place.” GRRRRRRRIFT!
  • “Mike has been putting everything in place for us. I am going to celebrate today. This is going to make a lot of very wealthy people.”
  • Flynn will make sure the sanctions are “ripped up,” because that darn Obama “fucked everything up in my nuclear deal with the sanctions.” THANKS OBAMA!
  • “Awwwwww, Mike Flynn just texted me a picture of his penis from the Capitol steps! He knows that’s my favorite.”

OK, we are fooling about the dick pic. We don’t know if Flynn has ever sent his buddy Copson dick pics, and neither does Elijah Cummings. (We also don’t know that he DIDN’T, so keep that in mind.)

But wait there’s more!

“Recolonize the Middle East,” huh? And all with this handy plan in place to put MANY MORE United States troops on the ground!

So, Michael Flynn was working on a “Marshall Plan” for the Middle East, to enrich Americans and Russians (AND GIVE RUSSIANS URANIUM) and dude is talking about literally recolonizing the Middle East? Hmmmm, that is weird! Sounds like the vague outlines of a plan to get less-than-patriotic greedy grifter types in America — Trump family, Mercer family, Erik Prince, etc.; Sarah Palin will probably write a book of Bible devotionals about it — together with the Russian government and its oligarchs to rape, pillage, loot and steal the Middle East, and when they’re done with that, they’ll grab it by the pussy some more.

And this will somehow make the Middle East better, because KA-CHING! Whitey has come back to recolonize, and it would hurt their bottom line if the natives were restless!

Back in October, we bookmarked a WHOA IF TRUE Twitter thread from corporate-intelligence guy Eric Garland, and we’re not going to reproduce it all here, but you should go read it, because it seems he might have been on to something. The broad outline is that Russia put in place a plan to steal the Middle East’s resources, and over the years cultivated “traitors with weird, mad power fantasies” in America, like Flynn and others.

Meanwhile, Blackwater Sadist-For-Jesus Erik Prince, as Garland said in October, is “already rogue, building mercenary armies” and living in the United Arab Emirates. Remember that weird meeting in Seychelles in January 2016 (just before the inauguration!) between Prince, a Russian fund director who likes to cross streams with Vladimir Putin during sleepovers (allegedly), and the fucking crown prince of Abu Dhabi, to set up a “back channel” between Trump and the Russians? That was weird, right?

Meanwhile, Prince has his hand out begging Trump to let him turn Afghanistan into his VERY OWN MURDER COLONY, and Prince and fellow traveling creeper Oliver North (OLLIE FUCKING NORTH!) are pushing a plan to convince Trump to let them create a grifty, top secret B613 of off-the-book spies who can run shit in whatever countries they want.

Rogue, indeed.

As Garland noted, this would be hard to pull off under a normal American president. But what if …

What if that’s the whole point of this? What if that’s why Russia cultivated Trump in the first place? To — eventually, one day! — get a new form of government in America that would be an autocracy/kleptocracy just like Russia, one that would be DTF with a plan to slice up the Middle East, and let a bunch of rich guys from America and Russia make off with the profits? Hell, the number of people involved in this scam seems so vast, Trump actually becoming president might not have even been part of the original plan. But then BING BONG, 2016 happened, Trump became the GOP nominee, and the fact Russia got to off Hillary Clinton’s political career in the process was just icing on the cake.

Michael Flynn lost his job as national security advisor after a solid few weeks of work, so he doesn’t get to be a part of whatever these fuckers are trying to do now. But over at Crooks & Liars, Karoli Kuns points out that, while Russian sanctions haven’t technically been “ripped up,” Donald Fucking Trump sure as hell isn’t enforcing them, and the new ones Congress passed by a margin of one million to zero aren’t being implemented. That would be bad for his Russian masters’ bottom line, and also for his own finances, most likely!

Is the plan still full-speed ahead, even if they have to say, “Fuck that Michael Flynn guy” now?

We know there’s a lot of JUST ASKING QUESTIONS in here, and also a lot of THE FUCK YOU SAY, but nothing is impossible anymore. The grifters are in charge, in Washington and in Moscow (AND THEY’RE PALS WITH EACH OTHER!), they’re ready to loot their own countries and the rest of the world, and they don’t fucking care who they hurt in the process.

But now Flynn is flipped, and he got to skate on a tiny baby charge, in exchange for turning on everybody else. And now we’re learning about this whistleblower from Elijah Cummings, because Robert Mueller has already figured this shit out.

What in the hell kind of nuclear bomb of information is Mueller holding?

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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[Cummings letter]

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  • YoBunnyBunny

    Copson, according to Cummings’s letter, was sporting a grifting boner so raging he could have used it to pole vault through the Reflecting Pool:

    I just love the dick jokes around here.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Evan does have a way with penis prose, does he not?

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      They’re almost enough to make you want Dick Armey back in politics.

  • Joe Beese

    Russia put in place a plan to steal the Middle East’s resources

    That’s our move!

  • Joe Beese

    traitors with weird, mad power fantasies

    In fairness, this describes half of Washington DC.

    • BadKitty904

      And all of the current Congress.

      • OrG

        Not all. Just the rethugs.

        • BadKitty904

          After Shumer’s bullshittery, I’m beginning to wonder…

          • alpacapunchbowl

            It’s a guarantee that some of our peeps are dirty.

  • OrG

    Well, for one thing,oliie north should be in prison.

    • Parakeetist

      YES PREACH IT

    • BadKitty904

      Seriously in prison. Like, TOTALLY in prison.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      I’m probably being overly optimistic here, but it sounds like we may yet get our chance.

    • Eileen Besse

      THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS

  • hudson

    what these guys have figured out is grift. israel buys weapons from us, saudi arabia buys weapons from us, not to mention other states with regressive notions of society. wtf is the incentive for the us to resolve any of these issues? in fact, when and where politically convenient we will and can escalate the tensions on the ground, and milk from both ends. and so does russia, and france and britain and so on. our chest beating is not gonna solve this.

  • maxneanderthal

    I suspect that Mueller effectively knows everything. As in Every-fucking-thing. And if he doesn’t know it yet, he has everyone who can tell him it by the balls. And he is only just starting to squeeze..This is like Josh Brolin’s character in “Sicario” explaining to the corrupt cop “This is where you negotiate how to survive”…

  • BadKitty904
    • SweetDeeKat

      Holy fuck, indeed.

      • BadKitty904

        Preeeeeeeety much.

    • Ill-Advised

      Damn it, how’d you get my cat to hold still for the pic?

      • BadKitty904

        He was stunned by the magnitude of Flynn’s treason.

  • ManchuCandidate

    I’d like to sell the Middle East a nuke.
    With A Russian harmony.
    I’d like them to buy a shit ton of arms
    And make loads of money

    I’d like to see the Middle East for once
    All standing arm in arm
    And get fleeced by Russkies and Yanks
    In the name of making dough…

  • Blackest Noobs
    • Raan

      Fuck, that’s tame for us.

      Now, if she’d been on meth and was signing instructions on how to cook meth, then we’ve got a story!

    • BosGrl

      One of the comments was “why do we still need sign language when we have CC?” Well, um, there were people at the press conference and life doesn’t have CC? I’m sure deaf Wonkers could answer that properly.

    • Blackest Noobs
    • Werewolf

      Oh, FFS. My son is Deaf, and this crap just pisses me off. Although, I will defend the guy in Manatee County-he was just someone with a Deaf brother who got drafted into interpreting even though he’s not a terp. That was the county’s fuck-up, not his.

  • schmannity

    I’m calling bs on this story. How could anyone find another person during inauguration with those massive, historic crowds?

    • BadKitty904

      There was a throng of dozens, I tells ya!

      • Shelli Kae

        What’s worse than a mediocre inauguration crowd? An even tinier light the Jesus tree crowd! I mean come the fuck on Trump zombies, he came, he saw, he kicked ass and won the War on Christmas! That’s more than President Obama or any other modern president did for you! Seems like it would have been standing room only along with songs of praise instead of just the older women who work the Nursery on Sundays. They should be ashamed. Next year there may not be a choice but to go. By then it would just be the unveiling of Trump Statue on the Trump House lawn with the Trumpettes singing ‘My Trump is an awesome Trump’ in Washington DJT!

      • BackDoorMan

        … “they were amassing by the tens…”
        … “of thousands?…”

        … “no… of tens. A couple of dozen, to be generous.”

        • BadKitty904

          “People came from yards around…”

  • Blackest Noobs

    if you haven’t realized it…white people are really fucking dumb.
    they voted for these assholes.

    • Ricky-pus gutted tub of guts

      #NotAllCrackers

      • Ricky-pus gutted tub of guts

        But yeah, we are. :)

      • Blackest Noobs

        #ButEnoughCrackasDid

        • WomanInThePersistence

          God/dress, I know. It’s so fucking depressing.

      • TJ Barke

        #notallhonkies

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Many white people are idiots. As a white person, I know this. But at least cut us white Wonketeers some slack. Please.

      • Blackest Noobs

        no more slack…whitey had hundred of years of slack

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Fair enough. But, and I’m not being argumentative just curious, is there anything that white people can do?

          • Blackest Noobs

            not be white.

            i kid i kid.

            but for starters get a hold on their racial biases.
            known plenty of white people who consider me a friend and even they fucking slip up and say something totally fucking racist as shit. i get tired of having to play race police. y’all need to police thy selves.

          • Holly

            TRIGGER WARNING: I’m not going to sugarcoat or make nice. I would have to point out that your racial bias showed clearly when you stated the sweeping generalization “white people are really fucking dumb”. I am a white woman. I am not dumb. I am offended by your statement. I can’t think of one instance where I have called a person of another color “fucking dumb”. And anointing us with your bigoted “whitey” does nothing for your argument. Oh, and if you weren’t aware my son is one of the finest people you’d ever want to meet. Julian, my son, is a black man.

          • Blackest Noobs

            i am snoring.

          • Blackest Noobs

            and p.s. they not generalization when true.
            you don’t often hear about cops shooting white kids dead, or white people shooting black kids dead. but sure be mad at me.

          • Holly

            As mad as you are with all us “whitey’s”? Let me tell you a little story about how I live on a day to day basis. I worry about Julian every. single. fucking. minute. Just stop, and think for one minute about what your anger is doing to you, and to those around you. I live in a constant state of worry that our “polite society” will hurt my son. Don’t tell me about the shooting of black kids. I FUCKING live it every fucking day.

          • Blackest Noobs

            i still really don’t fucking care, whiner.

          • Holly

            I’m absolutely sure you don’t give a rats ass about anything or anyone. I’d like to think we’re an extended family here on Wonkette. That we’re a happy, tolerant and loving bunch. There are exceptions, of course.

          • Blackest Noobs

            says the person who think she is excused because i got a black something.

          • Blackest Noobs

            also your line about having a black son, as if that kept you from being a fucking racist shit, i hear that shit from whitey all the time and say ooooh i got a token black friend, i cannot be racist.

            given how bent out of shape you are, i would say likely you’re full of shit.

          • Holly

            If that’s what you have to believe then so be it. I’ll say goodbye then.

          • Blackest Noobs

            DO.NOT.GIVE.A.FUCK.

            seriously, if you’re gonna prove you’re not the “bad” white person saying you have a black whatever or friend or son or daughter or husband IS NOT GONNA CUT THE FUCKING MUSTARD.

            fucking racists say that shit ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

          • Holly

            Suffice to say I will no longer engage in this ridiculous sparring. It serves absolutely no purpose, and I now choose to eschew this toxicity. Good night and I wish you well in whatever your endeavors may be.

    • Parakeetist

      I is a white lady. I voted for the Hillary person.

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        I is a white girl too, and millennial with liberal arts degree at that. I voted for the Hillary person too. Although in an ideal world I’d have been teleported to the better side of the Orange Curtain by now and would be able to vote for the Trudeau Liberals in 2019.

    • Paul

      This bigoted shit again?

      • Blackest Noobs

        well if the shoes fits, you should stop wearing shoes.

        apparently hit a sore spot with you. i betcha you aint so purely white as your skin is.

        • Paul

          What does any of that mean? Here’s what I mean, from Merriam-Webster:

          Definition of bigot
          : a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (such as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance

          • Blackest Noobs

            it means you’re an idiot.

          • Blackest Noobs

            yes by all means tell me how we don’t have a white people problem

            https://goo.gl/images/dX3pLi

          • Not sayin’ you’re wrong but – are you male? Because we have a male problem.

            Are you straight? Because we have a homophobic problem.

            Anybody in a group with privilege (and “white” may be the most important one right now, I’m not sure how to measure this) …but anybody in a privileged group has stereotypes, ingrained habits, and especially a lack of experience being the Other, and therefore blind spots.

            Most of us belong to several groups* with privilege.

            * Including but not limited to white; male; straight; rich; educated; American; average or attractive; mainstream Christian; neurotypical; not physically handicapped; etc.

          • Blackest Noobs

            we definitely have a male white person problem…but mostly white people.

  • Bill D. Burger

    The full Elijah Cummings letter detailing a whistleblower’s account that Michael Flynn told an associate that Russia sanctions would be “ripped up” early in the Trump presidency.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DQYg4FnU8AArrCs.jpg

  • dslindc

    Lock all of them up! Lock all of them up!

  • WomanInThePersistence
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      I was just thinking that I was in the mood for this again!

      • WomanInThePersistence

        It’s even on topic!

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Recolonize the Middle East? What could possibly go wrong?

    • Seek

      Better than that – Why? the oil, while not worthless, is becoming less of a prize and that place is going to get much worse as climate change riles everyone up with drought and famine. What do they gain?

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Crystalclear12

    Shit, it just keeps getting worse.
    It’s like cleaning out a hoarder’s house.
    Oh look, a dead squirrel.

    • Bill D. Burger

      …and over there___a dead elephant! ;)

    • schmannity

      Any WMDs? Asking for an ex-President.

      • Crystalclear12

        One but it’s expired and it smells funny.

        • schmannity

          Sarin smells kinda funky–briefly.

          • Crystalclear12

            No. . . says ther_o nuc_c__a. . .missing some letters.

    • BearDeLaOursistance

      And Berlitz’ “Teach Yourself Russian”!

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      Ugh, don’t. I’m going to end up having to do that with my grandmother’s house that my wacko aunt lives in when she finally croaks. I’m actually rooting for the nuclear debris to claim us all before then.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccccckkkkkkkkkk………

  • schmannity

    So, all this free, highly enriched Uranium for Russia, is completely different from the Uranium One ore still in the ground? If only the Clinton Foundation had known of this profit center.

  • Scooby

    Damn, Lex Luthor was a more ethical president.

    • BadKitty904

      More competent and less destructive, too.

    • Blanche de Shambles

      “Look- it’s not a ‘Death Ray.’ It’s an orbital platform equipped with a device that projects a stream of particles into the Earth’s crust, causing it to fracture and expose the mantle. Any loss of life would be purely coincidental.”

  • TJ Barke

    LOCK HIM UP! LOCK HIM UP! LOCK HIM UP!

  • armed_bears

    Apropos of nothing in this miserable week: The surprise winter kid from Thanksgiving day, now cleverly named Surprise, is doing well and is pleased with herself.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0e88df0b8805d50a1a538b64dd4198d20a39b74b26ef84ef8a29146e83eb2012.jpg

    • BosGrl

      Now that’s a cute kid.

    • She’s erudite, urbane, and, obviously, well-read.

      • armed_bears

        All true, but I am pretty sure Amazon is gonna reject that box as a return.

    • BadKitty904
    • WomanInThePersistence

      You keep goats in your library? I knew there was a reason I liked you.

      • armed_bears

        Long story, involving Wendy One-Tit not wanting to nurse, so in she came…

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Those are awesome pictures.

    • (((Sedagive)))

      Yay – she’s beautiful!

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      Aww… She must know she gets attention for being so cute — and really knows how to milk it…

      • armed_bears

        Once you bottle-raise one, you’re Mom forever…. even when they’re 200 lbs. Small price to pay.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      “I haz box and you doesn’t.”

      • armed_bears

        and I haz beauty.

    • Holly

      Totally Adorable and has stolen my heart.

  • janecita

    Meanwhile the Democratic Party is busy going after Al Franken.

    • Ricky-pus gutted tub of guts

      as one does

      • janecita

        Because priorities, like stepping on their own dicks.

        • CripesAmighty

          (Posted on the other thread, but oh-so-apropos, here):
          https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YgYEuJ5u1K0

          • janecita

            The Democrats in a nutshell.

        • Ricky-pus gutted tub of guts

          That failure isn’t gonna pull itself out of the jaws of victory!

    • Bill D. Burger

      That appears to be ALL the MSM wants to cover today.

      • Eileen Besse

        We’re watching the screensavers now….

  • BadKitty904

    So. An international cabal of criminals willing to destroy the world in order to enrich themselves. I thought SPECTRE was fiction?

    • Raan

      It’s certainly more organized. We’re in KAOS territory here.

    • schmannity

      Competence level suggests Chaos, not SPECTRE.

      • BadKitty904

        It’s a fair cop…

        • Lambsendbeds

          …but society is to blame.

          • Non-Threatening Ron

            Right. We’ll be bookin’ ‘im too.

      • weighmaster

        I believe that was KAOS

        • Raan

          After all, if they could be consistently foiled by Maxwell Smart, one of the least competent humans ever to live, what chance do they stand against Mueller?

        • Non-Threatening Ron

          In the pilot they were ‘Station KAOS, a Delaware corporation.’
          Max: A Delaware corporation?
          Chief: Tax purposes.

        • schmannity

          Missed it bythatmuch, Chief.

          • weighmaster

            Would ja believe a herd dog and a 10-year -old with a can and a string?

    • Jmom
  • Crystalclear12

    Hmm. . .it looks like we are at “make’em sweat” portion of the Mueller investigation.

    Get your deals, get your hot deals here!
    -Mueller

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    What in the hell kind of nuclear bomb of information is Mueller holding?

    The kind that you really do want to be in orbit when it goes off?

  • TJ Barke
  • calliecallie

    When I think back on those cartoons I watched as a child, where some villain was mwa-ah-ah-ing about his plan to take over the world, I really never expected to live to see that in real life.

  • jesterpunk

    So Flynn wanted to blow up the middle east and build a bunch of nuclear reactors with the US military guarding them? Trump today just announced a plan to move the US embassy to Jerusalem and recognize it as Israel’s capital which every world leader except Putin said is very bad and will cause lots of problems. Is that part of his plan to get troops into the middle east?

    • TJ Barke

      Yup. Meanwhile, Saudi Arabia is gearing up to launch what will likely become a region-wide war.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        They are losing in Yemen and wanting to kick Iran’s butt.

        • TJ Barke

          They want US to kick Iran’s butt.

          • Non-Threatening Ron

            First thing I noticed is that the US is paying for the party with human lives, but everybody else will be finishing off the liquor.

  • proudgrampa

    Really. If this is what we KNOW, what the hell is it that we DON’T???

    • BadKitty904
    • Raan

      The names, birthdates, and home addresses of the pee hookers?

      It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        OH gosh, I certainly don’t think we should dox them. They are just professionals called in to perform a service.

        • Raan

          Well, as long as Mueller has them.

    • Crystalclear12

      I am concerned our strategic north American alcohol reserves may not be enough when the levy breaks.

      • proudgrampa

        RUN FOR THE STILLS!!!

  • An Outhouse for the résistance

    Maybe lighting the Mid East on fire this week helps out too!

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    I got nothing. My affect is broken, I can’t even feel outrage.

  • theblackdog

    I hope the whistleblower is under the best protection possible.

  • arglebargle

    5:00. I’m drinking.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      2:05. Me too.

      • Lambsendbeds

        Have one for me please.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          If you insist. Just want to say, that I had inventory today. And have been up since 2:30 am. Honestly, I try to keep the day-drinking down to a bare minimum.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Back in October, we bookmarked a WHOA IF TRUE Twitter thread from corporate-intelligence guy Eric Garland, and we’re not going to reproduce it all here, but you should go read it, because it seems he might have been on to something.

    Indeed he was:

    Do you feel bad about not keeping this all straight?

    JEEBUS GO EASY ON YOURSELF. This is impossible for one person to understand!

    Glad I’m not the only one who is overwhelmed FFS. Pretty sure that’s by design also too.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      It helps to go back and read the twitter thread Evan linked to. It all makes sense, now, in a really twisted way. And makes it even more painfully obvious that Trump and Putin are partners in a deal, not adversaries.

  • TJ Barke

    Tom Clancy just creamed his jeans from beyond the grave.

    • Raan

      Wait, Tom Clancy died?

      When the hell did this happen?

      • TJ Barke

        2013.

  • Alexander Stallwitz

    I would say we elected a Supervillian like Dr Doom and Lex Luthor as President but i am pretty sure Dr doom or Lex Luthor would know what they were doing.

    • TJ Barke

      Dr. Doom is a furriner.

      • Alexander Stallwitz

        Meh, hes a villian. Pretty sure that wouldnt stop him.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Lex Luthor actually divested himself of LexCorp when he became President.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        That’s because he placed it in good hands and could get his job back after he left office.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      “We”?

    • Apple Scruff

      We elected a Scooby Doo villain. And he would’ve gotten away with it if it weren’t for those meddling kids he wasn’t so fucking stupid.

      • Tetman Callis

        it ain’t over till the fat bastard screams

    • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird

      Michael Moore still maintains that Emperor Shitstane the Orange is an evil genius who will outsmart us all.

      • BackDoorMan

        … when a vast swath of the populace surrenders to the inevitability of its own stupidity, this is the result. If there’s a fine line between genius and madness, it’s long been eroded.

  • Crystalclear12

    Oh, oh, oh
    I know what want for Christmas!

  • Blackest Noobs

    i never met a grifter that i did not want to beat fucking senseless.

    • Bigby

      Even John Cusack when he got beat down for grifting a sharp bartender in The Grifters?

      • Blackest Noobs

        i would’ve done the same, baseball bat to the gut for good old Roy.

        • Non-Threatening Ron

          To the gut? I admire your restraint.

          • Blackest Noobs

            ha ha …if i remembered correctly, that’s what happened to him in the movie/play?

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        Nah, too cute, and also too a Democrat. Flynn is a beady-eyed corrupt little shit who disgraces the uniform with power-mad fantasies of napalm in the morning. He wants nukular, he’s going to get popcorn…

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NN-f5F-xwR4

        • Lascauxcaveman

          That was such great movie.

  • Bigby

    Didn’t those idiot Late Great Planet Earth, Eschaton, Bear and Eagle, Gog and Magog, Nostradumbass, Revelations, Damien Omen 3 prophesies *all* have the motherfucking ANTICHRIST setting this kind of shit up on the Plains of Meggido? You know, in Israel right next to f-ing Syria?

    So basically, as this all unfolds the Rethugs/Fundigelicals are literally saying “Hurray Antichrist! We LOVE you!” about all this?? If you root for the Antichrist at this time, is God actually cool with that? I mean, even if you stupidly believe YOU’RE going to be raptured, is God cool with you rooting for the Other Team *before* the rapture? Cuz THAT fish won’t hunt, mon frere!

    • BadKitty904

      And the sixth angel poured out his vial upon the great river Euphrates; and the water thereof was dried up, that the way of the kings of the east might be prepared.

      And I saw three unclean spirits like frogs come out of the mouth of the dragon, and out of the mouth of the beast, and out of the mouth of the false prophet.

      For they are the spirits of devils, working miracles, which go forth unto the kings of the earth and of the whole world, to gather them to the battle of that great day of God Almighty.

      And he gathered them together into a place called in the Hebrew tongue Armageddon.

      ~ Revelations 16:12-16 KJV

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        When do the cats take over?

      • Boojum

        Bannon has to be one of the frog spirits.

        • BadKitty904

          Easily.

      • Non-Threatening Ron

        It was a closely-decided thing, you know. The Apocalypse (Revelation of Saint John the Divine) was almost left out of the canonical New Testament. Sometimes I think the world would have been rather more sane had it been left out.

        • BadKitty904

          But it’s got some cool scenes in it!

          • Non-Threatening Ron

            No-one knows who the guy was, but I’ll bet a cookie he had a GREAT connection.

      • mailman27

        Woo-woo-spooky nonsense. Of a piece with many other strains of nonsense in the holy books. Some pretty cool poetry/literature in the service of myth.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    What in the hell kind of nuclear bomb of information is Mueller holding?

    Donald Trump Is Guilty.

  • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird

    I’ve been telling people for a year that Trump wants to turn Amerikkka into another Russia-style oligarchy / kleptocracy so he gets to grab whatever he can steal and be as rich as Putin, instead of as rich as he currently isn’t, really. The overall picture was already obvious even if you couldn’t prove it yet because you didn’t have all the puzzle pieces.

    • TJ Barke

      Hell, the whole republican party basically wants that.

    • Anna Rompage

      Donad is about to set up his own private secret police force, that will be run by a psychopathic mercenary…

      • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird

        I know, it’s nuts. This shit goes so fucking deep that if you just tell it absolutely straight you sound like a raving lunatic.

        • efoveks

          This is why we all must drink.

    • Meccalopolis

      That’s what putin wants. D boy is Ryan Seacrest

  • OneYieldRegular

    Oh sure, we and our allies imposed sanctions simply because the Russians invaded and annexed part of a sovereign country, had a slew of companies trading in illegal arms and involved in other corrupt activities, sent an army of hackers to disrupt American institutions including its electoral process, and shot down a commercial airliner, killing all aboard.

    This is terrible, How were we to know that this would interfere with some schlub’s business wet dream of profiting off of building nuclear reactors in the Middle East?

  • Crystalclear12

    They really suck at this, don’t they?

    • hudson

      how does it matter ya? what they have figured out is that being exposed at suckage does not count. what counts is winning in the electoral college. if you have that you can have your way.

      • BadKitty904

        what counts is buying in the electoral college.

    • BadKitty904

      Fat, evil, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

      • hudson

        so say you. but right here, right now, they who are those make bacon.

  • Anna Rompage

    Child molesters, Russian grifters, what the fuck is next to come from the GOP, Mitch McConnell sacrificing young virgins on the floor of the senate to appease Old Testament Jeebus?

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Don’t give him any ideas …

    • Crystalclear12

      Done earlier this year.
      Remember. . . they called it healthcare reform?

      • efoveks

        Also too: failure to fund children’s healthcare in a timely fashion.

        • Roadstergal

          With Moore in the Senate, they won’t be virgins anymore.

    • Keith Taylor

      No, that’ll be Roy Moore. And he can justify it with Judges Chapter 11.
      Funny how when I and my sisters were wide-eyed kids in Sunday School, our teachers never drew our attention to that one.

    • John D.

      Just as David Gerrold imagined many years ago:

      …the kind of man who would sacrifice naked girl scouts, cookie packages still clutched in their hands, before a giant statue of Mammon, the god of money, while cackling gleefully and muttering arcane verses from the Wall Street Journal. (In fact, the girl scouts were delivered to his office once a month, just before the full moon.)

      (Totally different context. He wrote that as an obvious joke, not that such men would actually approach that exaggeration!)

  • Jgb979

    Really hoping he’s got some polonium food testers at Flynn Mans. (And this muthafucker better be singing like a soprano)

    • Raan

      He better be singing like Big Pussy.

  • Crystalclear12

    To our Republican turn coats,
    Not everyone gets a deal, so don’t be late😈

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      Act now, and avoid the War on Christmas rush.

      • Crystalclear12

        One deal per person!

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
    • TJ Barke

      Irony is dead.

    • I suppose being impacted explains why he’s so full of shit.

    • BosGrl

      Wow, he’s a 3rd? Three tries and they couldn’t get his model right.

      • JustDon’tSayProbably

        Kind of the K-car of humanity.

    • BadKitty904

      By being so wildly incompetent that he can’t damage it as badly as his fellow Republicans?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      So, the Handmaiden dress has a summer version? Who knew?

    • Non-Threatening Ron

      Defending it from what?

    • Meccalopolis

      Guignol level of absurd

  • alpacapunchbowl

    This scheme rings true to me. Russia’s economy is for shit, despite what all their successes in fuckery might indicate. They’re desperate for that sweet, sweet crude. And the sour crude.

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      So they installed a president who is both sour and crude.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Fitting, innit?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Kung Po libel!

    • efoveks

      Yep. This is what happens when you’ve bankrupted your visionaries, your innovators, and your people who take pride in what they do. Congratulations, Comrade Putin: you have created a nation of parasites.

    • ChumpsForTrump

      This is part of why I said in the other comments section – when we get out from under this ratfuckery, the puppets are gone and the whole story is out, Russia is gonna be in deep shit.

      The Magnitsky act is like hitting the lottery compared to what’s gonna happen to their economy, when post-Trump America shuts them out for real.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        That will be a great fucking day!
        I hope we (individually and America as both entity and concept) survive the Trump regime.

  • The Wanderer

    Just like this, it’s the juxtaposition of the Inauguration with the tawdry business of selling out your country that really sinks home:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CDlBLvc3YE

    • BadKitty904

      Don’t think future film directors and opera writers won’t see it, too…

      • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird

        Can you imagine when the movie of all this shit comes out? Epic…

        • Non-Threatening Ron

          With a bunch of oldz in the audience shouting, ‘It wasn’t like that!’

      • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

        There’s going to be people in the future?

        • MsEdgyNation

          The film directors and opera writers of the future will probably be mutant rats and cockroaches.

        • BadKitty904

          Maybe.

      • therblig

        instead of “Nixon in China”, we have “Pigs in Shit”

        • Grumpy Twat

          Or “Cose fan Tutte”

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Golly. This makes Denturegate seem like such a trivial little distraction.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    about literally recolonizing the Middle East?

    Our own personal Lebensraum!

    • Non-Threatening Ron

      Because that worked so well last time.

    • hudson

      no seriously, wtf was the need for this asshole move, presently, if not to wag the dog?nobody was asking for it. why the the fuck does the US have to draw a line in sand when not needed?

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      REACH OUT AND NUKE FAITH!

  • Boojum

    So, this is Uranium One Billion?

  • Holly

    DEALS! Come on down. Deals for almost EVERYONE! Better come early because these deals are going fast and are only going to those with a great story to tell.

  • Roadstergal
  • (((Sedagive)))

    I’ve told this story here before, but I cannot believe how it becomes more and more true.

    Short version of a half-hour conversation: an ex-military Russian guy (cartoonishly huge and bald) who was helping me with a last-minute moving job on a bitterly cold Winter night in 2015 told me that the Kremlin was pulling strings globally, that Americans are politically stupid, naive and clueless, and that “soon” America and the world would see that Russia was truly in control. He told me that the “Kremlin has allies” everywhere, and that everything from the Arab Spring to American foreign policy was being gamed by Moscow.

    I thought he was just another conspiracy-addled eccentric. That conversation continues to haunt me.

    • efoveks

      Wow. That is scary.

      • (((Sedagive)))

        2015. So long ago.

        I have family who were in military intelligence, who monitored Russia. I don’t know much, but I know something.

        I just kind of nodded and offered a few weak defenses as he looked daggers at me in the rear-view mirror.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Sad to say, looks like Burroughs had it right.
      ‘A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what’s going on. ‘

      • TJ Barke

        Just cuz you’re paranoid doesn’t mean no one’s out to get you.

        • Meccalopolis

          Bukowski!

        • Little Lulu Ω

          I just pretend they’re all talent scouts and go on with my life.

    • 🍁 Girl Guide Salute 🖖🏻

      The Hetalia anime was right. We will someday all be One Russia. 😲

    • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird

      FUCKING WHOA

    • Maria Sewell

      I live my life between Greece and Canada, and am acutely aware of the political innocence of Canadians vs cynical Greeks who have had nothing but corrupt, bad government since their independence in the early 1800s. I’m truly, truly sorry that political innocence in the US will be lost forever after this hideous fuck’s administration. There’s no purging and returning… kinda like virginity. A natural outcome of so little transparency after Citizens United.

  • Daniel
  • Spurning Beer

    I’m frightened.

    Hold me.

    • efoveks

      *BIG hug*

  • Tetman Callis

    we r so fukkt

  • yyyaz

    And while the mega-ugly-rich consolidate their stranglehold on ALL the munniez, the rest of us are just cheap entertainment being fucked with for their amusement. Zeus would be proud.

  • Cornelius Fussbudget

    I have wondered where the whole Hillary/Uranium One thing came from. It’s so random! Why bother trying to tie Hillary to something that is not really a scandal?

    Now we know. I’d bet multiple dollars that you can trace the Uranium One story directly to House R’s finding out about ACU Strategic Partners. They were just trying to muddy the waters. As they do.

    • TJ Barke

      Yup. Massive projection.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      Muddying the waters is all they’ve got. The bad news is, it’s very effective.

    • OppressedMass

      Every accusation = a confession

  • Proud Liberal
    • TJ Barke

      Except Russia isn’t communist anymore.

      • Proud Liberal

        The article talks about what Amerika was about. It eerily sounds like what is happening today.

      • James Smith

        Still a dictatorship

        • TJ Barke

          Fair enough.

  • Fartknocker

    Flynn’s new rank is 3 Star Traitor.

    • President in Exile Firefly

      That’s his Yelp review. “Service was slow but would bribe again.”

  • Jimh

    I really hope Mueller has all the goods. And I’m sure he’s aware of all the potential ways this could play out. I’m just worried that the bastards will get away with it.

    • BadKitty904

      As long as they’re out of office, I’ll live with it.

      • Meccalopolis

        That’s number one. we can chase them to the ends of the earth with subpoenas later

        • BadKitty904

          Exactly. Triage first – stop America’s bleeding, etc. Then hunt down the perpetraitors…

  • alpacapunchbowl

    I would give my left ovary to find out this has been 11-dimension chess with the end goal of taking out Russia and the homegrown traitors once and for all.
    Granted, that’s disingenuous since I have no intention of using either of my ovaries, and it’s a little too idealistic and fantasyland even for me, but wouldn’t it be nice?

    • would make a great screenplay though.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        I wish I had the discipline to be a writer.
        It’s what I’ve wanted to do since I was a small child.

  • tehbaddr

    Wow! And Mueller knows all this? I wonder what sort of convictions he’s after, how many, and how long it will take to wrangle up all these plutocrats!

    • Jimh

      How long it will take is important to me, because I am getting zero work done while watching this slow motion train wreck itself.

      • LeftyProud

        You and me both! Also too, I ned to know if we should get out of dodge. With the tax plant an almost a go, I want to stockpile the monies if I need to move. Yes, I am overreacting.

    • Ms.Moon

      I am hoping for the guillotine cure. I’m French on my mother’s side and I have a great deal of affection for them. If they were good enough for aristocrats and the king and queen they’re good enough for all these crooks.

      • nosuchuser

        I suggest that we go through the right wing donor, pundit, and political classes and publicly guillotine 1-2% via a somewhat random and capricious selection process.

        That should keep the survivors on their best behavior for a couple of generations. If not we hold the culling 2: wood chippers of justice.

    • James Smith

      What did Flynn trade so his ass wouldn’t be in jail.

      • Meccalopolis

        Had to be good. Had better have been good cause damn that boy should swing

  • bbayliss

    holy shit

  • tehbaddr

    “Whitey has come back to recolonize”, ‘cuase Whitey isn’t on the moon no more!

    • Grumpy Twat

      Is that from “Pieces of an administration”?

  • SadDemInTex

    OLIVER NORTH!!!!!!! What the flaming fuck. I’m praying for Mueller every day.

  • SadDemInTex

    RECOLONIZE the Mideast!!!! What the flaming fuck shit smegma!!!!

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    “The whistleblower says that day in January he met Alex Copson’

    That Day in January would be a GREAT title for teh inevitable miniseries about Trump and Co’s shocking rise to power and (really) inevitable fall from grace (what little they had). The title reflects what we all felt that day: the shame, the fear, the bewilderment!

    Okay, fun time – what would your title of the inevitable miniseries be…bonus points for best actor to play trump. Paul Giamatti’s always a safe bet, but he doesn’t quite have “it” to be Trump.

    • Proud Liberal

      Nick Nolte should play Trump.

      • Dept. of Space Tacos

        i say this will all due seriousness, that is a fucking brilliant idea.

        My ONLY quibble is Nolte has a cool, cigarette and liquor-gravelly voice – they’d have to dub in his lines.

      • DensityDestiny

        Or maybe Gary Bussey? He does psychotic/crazy well IRL.

      • MsEdgyNation

        But does Nick Nolte have ill-fitting dentures to slurp on awkwardly while speaking?

      • xintheline

        Gary Busey. He fathered Eric. The natural choice.

    • JustDon’tSayProbably

      Why We Hate Ohio?

    • DensityDestiny

      America in the Upside-Down. That’s what it feels like.
      And why replace Alec Baldwin? He’s an ass, but he’s good at one thing.

    • James Smith

      Benedict Cumberbatch as Trump (because he’s in everything) in We’re Fucked

    • Meccalopolis

      Death of a nation

    • Red Bird

      White Rage, Part II

  • Dept. of Space Tacos

    “Remember that weird meeting in Seychelles in January 2016 (just before the inauguration!) between Prince, a Russian fund director who likes to cross streams with Vladimir Putin during sleepovers”

    I swear to god, for a hot second there, I was wondering why Prince, formerly known as the artist formerly known as prince, was mixed up in all this.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      The Purple One was trying to shut this shit down for us! He’d already gifted us with so much by way of music, but he wanted the best for us.

    • therblig

      trumpy wanted to try the “purple rain”

  • William
  • hendenburg2

    I’m just going to step in and remind everyone: power reactors in the Middle East wouldn’t represent an increase in proliferation risk for Russia, since Russia still has plenty of their own reactors and other facilities needed to reprocess spent fuel into weapons-grade material.

    • Meccalopolis

      And refining it and selling it to whom? I wonder

      • Mehmeisterjr

        James O’Keefe?

      • hendenburg2

        You can’t sell it. That’s not how it works. Russia is subject to UN/IAEA oversight (in fact, the US is the only country exempt). And keeping waste fuel in the Middle East is a much higher proliferation risk then sending it to Russia.

    • Red Bird

      Would it be wrong for me to wish several Chernobyls on them?

      • hendenburg2

        Yes

  • george gonzalez

    We used to call it “war profiteering”, but these folks have advanced the concept. They were planning to make tons of money and stash it on certain small islands, as to like to not pay taxes on ill-gotten gains, then the war comes after, when the plutonium has cooked. Nice deal if you can get away with it, and have no problem with tens of millions of people dying. Heck, that’s only about $1 of profit per person, quite allright.

    • BadKitty904

      What do they intend to buy with the money once everyone’s dead and everything’s destroyed?

      • Trip Space-Parasite

        Don’t be silly, money isn’t for buying things. It’s just for showing dominance over other money-havers.

        • BadKitty904

          Well, as long as their food/medical/water/etc. supplies last, I suppose…

      • blaid droog

        Not a one of them thought that far ahead.

        • BadKitty904

          True, that.

  • MOG253

    Well, they didn’t get anything else done Day One.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    If we really had a Deep State, they would just summarily arrest these people and execute them. We shouldn’t have to arrest them with votes.

    • phoenix00

      ie. USSR

  • Hemp Dogbane

    So that’s why so many were missing from the mall crowd on inauguration day. They were on their way to Abu Dhabi.

  • Paperless Tiger

    Is this what Trump had simmering in his brain when he blurted out that we should invade the Middle East and steal the oil? Now it makes sense.

    • James Smith

      That assumes he has a brain

      • His wig is an alien brain parasite….

  • Jeff Ackerman
    • blaid droog

      Robert De Niro?

      • Jeff Ackerman

        I wish…

      • phoenix00

        Krang

  • TootsStansbury

    I give up. This is worse than my most hyperbolic stream of consciousness drunk rambling. Will anything be done? Will we ever be nominally a Nation of Laws again?

    • i have serious doubts though i phrase it slightly differently. i can’t imagine how anyone – left or right – picks up this smoldering corpse and returns us to – jesus — last year.

    • mailman27

      I have been asking these very same questions to the point where my long-suffering spouse has begged me to knock it the fuck off. So I have KITFO, but it’s still racketing around inside my head.

  • Pluto Animus

    I get a tiny silver lining out of all this horror.

    I have always considered Republicans to be essentially evil, and everything that has happened over the past two years has vindicated me with an absolution and a completeness that provide a small measure of comfort.

    When Trump won, I mentally prepared myself for virtually any violation of human decency from these Conservative bastards, and was thus braced for all that has come so far.

    But it’s only a very small consolation.

    • anomie

      You lucky dog. I was stupidly hopeful.

  • Meccalopolis

    Thank you, Evan

  • Last Hussar

    Just made a connection. Might be wrong, but hear me out.

    Trump isn’t filling the state dept, it’d short of diplomats etc. He’s pulling out of agreements, Paris, Iran etc

    Couple of UK papers reporting in the vacuum Russia are becoming BFF with ME, African and Asian countries.

    So all those comments about Vlad being all upset Trump isn’t delivering, thst was never the point. Trump is known to be Russias laundromat. Now they have the US rudderless and not on the world stage.

    It’s not about controlling Dc, it’s about making sure no-one does.

    • Meccalopolis

      Some sweet sanctions relief would have been nice too. But hey, can’t have it all, am I right?

    • anomie

      Disruption of democracy and in US culture in general has been their goal all along.

    • phoenix00

      Take down the US on the world stage, leave everything open for Mother Russia.

      Poh-tae-toe, poh-tah-toe

  • WeaselPoo

    Those PNAC boys must be looking on with envy.

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    The worst thing I’ve heard about Prince so far is the proposed private security operation for the president because the shitgibbon doesn’t/can’t trust the so-called deep state. American Gestapo anyone?

    • Begin Anew Day

      Hell, donnie has already played the Secret Service off against his private security.

      With impeachment imminent he will have to pull the trigger soon.

  • Covfefe

    If American military forces are bogged down in a perpetual colonial war in the Middle East, Pitin will have a free hand in Europe.

  • Beelzebubba

    It’s becoming very difficult to distinguish between Putin’s genius and Trump’s idiocy. Two flavors that go great together.

  • dieselox

    Oh fuck.

  • Manhattan123

    There’s no way Flynn hasn’t sent a dick pic at some point in his miserable life.

    • James Baskin

      To himself would be my guess.

    • That would be the least of his problems at this point.

      • Amy!

        Almost certainly the very smallest. Tiny. Minuscule.

    • Begin Anew Day

      Do all the pictures of his grinning mug count as dick pix?

      He’s been sending those for DECADES.

  • blaid droog

    To quote Bobby Bittman;” In all seriousness”,I got more info from Evans blog than I got from huffpo or crooks and liars. Plus a plethora of dick jokes. Wonkette is my fave source for not fake news.

    • Begin Anew Day

      Truth and only Truth.

      • nosuchuser

        Well truth and tasteful filth.

    • gingerwentworth

      Blaid Droog, you’re killing me! But if I could just say, seriously, as a comic in this town, many many thanks for the plug!

  • Maria Sewell

    I think it was shrewd to allow Cummings to ‘explore’ this story, as GOP ramps up to smear and fire Mueller.

    • dshwa

      Mueller has been around a long time in Washington. He knows how the game is played. This was a warning shot to the GOP. I’ve got a lot of shit, and if Trump fucks with me I’m not going to be choosy about releasing it. And I might have found some of your buried bodies in the process.

      • Jennaratrix

        And I might have found some all of your buried bodies in the process.

        FTFY.

  • Alternative Dog

    This is why we can’t have nice things.

  • Jezzam

    Feb 27th, Trump announced plans to slash domestic and foreign aid by $54 billion and divert funds to ‘military’ spending. Now we know why

  • Red Bird

    I hope Mueller is safe.

    • Jennaratrix

      I’m willing to bet he’s got a crack security detail, and is probably carrying his own self.

  • Begin Anew Day

    “What in the hell kind of nuclear bomb of information is Mueller holding?”

    OK, I’ll just put my hand up and start shouting “ME, ME ME! I WANNA KNOW WHAT THAT INFORMATION BOMB BOB MUELLER IS HOLDING CONTAINS! I WANT IT ALL AND I WANT IT NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!”

    just saying.

    ;>)))

    • Me not sure

      I’m hoping that one of the news organizations has footage from the inauguration that shows Flynn in the act. I’ve already seen a still, but I want to see his thumbs moving frantically and see those large green neon dollar signs lighting up his squinty little eyes.

      • Unsaintific

        👆👍

    • It answers a question posed by a William Gibson character:

      “I felt like a punk who’d gone out to buy a switchblade and come home with a small neutron bomb.

      “Screwed again”, I thought. “What good’s a neutron bomb in a streetfight?”

  • cat48

    Damn, that’s scary shit! Thanks Comey & Mueller! Thanks Obama for not being a Crook. How are we going to get rid of all,the Russians embedded in our Country? A lot of them are NRA freaks & Grassley had about 15 at the National Prayer Breakfast. Maybe they’ll go home when the shit show leaves the WH?

    • sorbs

      The shit show will eventually close, but the dysentery will linger on for decades. These incompetent buffoons have well and truly screwed both the internal and external processes of our government for years to come.

      • Jennaratrix

        Decades. Perhaps even generations, should we be so lucky as to have future generations.

  • Unsaintific

    I’m beginning to think ‘they’ wouldn’t hesitate to ‘accident’ Mueller to death.
    And Sessions, PimpYo and tRump would close any investigation into the death.

    • Shaydee

      Exactly.

    • dieselox

      Mueller’s smart enough to cover that possibility. I bet it’s damn clear to all parties what gets released in the event of his untimely demise.

  • Keith Taylor

    And not only that — although “that” would be more than plenty. Just for a cute decoration atop this monstrous cake, multi-layered, Trump has now recognized Jerusalem as the capital of Israel and screw the irrelevant fact that Christians and Muslims regard it as a highly sacred place too. Personally I think Jerusalem is more trouble than it’s worth, to everybody, but … WTF? Is this berserk mindless destroyer trying to do EVERYTHING he can to set the Middle East afire?

    • Yeah, as an apatheist, I just don’t get the Jerusalem obsession. I’d much rather hang out in Tel Aviv.

    • Jennaratrix

      Is this berserk mindless destroyer trying to do EVERYTHING he can to set the Middle East afire?

      Probably, and it’s already working. He’s putting people in harm’s way with his shit-talking; like it or not, we still have troops in Afghanistan (and lots of other places with Muslim populations), and they are PISSED. What do they do when they’re pissed? I’ll give you three guess, and the first two don’t count because you don’t need them.

    • Tony Prost

      He just trying systematically to undo every single thing Obama did during his terms.

  • Mike Steele

    Re: the above
    We need much more Elijah Cummings, MSM asking about why sanctions have not yet been imposed, Velshi/Ruhle.
    We need much less complicitous Joe/Mika, Ms. Lindsey Graham, or anything NYT>

  • Walter Wellstone

    I hope the whistleblower is already being protected by Mueller. He/she is in serious danger. I don’t think these fuckers would have a problem killing people who get in their way.

    • Ray in VT

      Sorta like how the Clintons have been murdering people for decades (or so some on the rightwing would have you believe).

      • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

        I’ll tell ya, barely a week goes by when I’m not tripping over another damn Clinton murder victim corpse. Someone should really do something (I suggest upping the accusers meds tenfold)

        • Keith Taylor

          Yeah. Sometimes I get so ridiculously impractical I think about saying to a wingnut or two, “Blimey, all the people they are supposed to have had killed, they’d need several two-man teams of killers working full time, at least, and you try finding six or eight paid killers who (1) won’t screw up (2) won’t get caught (3) won’t squeal (4) won’t double-cross you and (5) won’t try to blackmail you — over a period of years too.”
          But what would be the point?
          That’s fact, logic and probability. Doesn’t apply under their Truman Show artificial dome.

  • NastyBossetti

    Wait… what?!

  • Jennaratrix

    What in the hell kind of nuclear bomb of information is Mueller holding?

    A motherfucking big one, I’m thinking.

  • Weird Fishes

    Let’s be frank about something. Bronzo the Malignant gives zero fucks about Jerusalem, the Evangelicals, the Rapture, Malignant Junior, clean cola, coal miners, or anyone or any thing that doesn’t either take the heat off of him for 10 minutes or line his pockets.

    We are being slowly and systematically – and increasingly openly – looted, do you understand? He does not care about anything other than enriching himself and his merry band.

    So are we all clear on this? Kudos to the #trumptards. Good job, you ignorant fools. Your charmingly rustic one-note native simplicity seals our collective fate a bit more tightly every day.

  • Felix Cambrensis

    So full of holes.

  • Zyxomma

    Well stated, Evan.

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