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Flipping off Mount Rushmore is not in the Constitution!

Lucian Wintrich, the Milo-in-Training of Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man on the Internet, found a thing to be outraged about over the weekend: a photo of three of those people flipping off the big stonefaces of Mt. Rushmore. He has a very important thought for stupid clueless liberals everywhere to consider:

It’s true: “Why did we ever let these people into our country if they treat our sacred places like this?” is certainly what the Lakota people have long thought about the theft of their land and the desecration of the place that used to be called Six Grandfathers. Unfortunately, it’s a little late for them to toughen up the lax immigration laws of 1492, so the interlopers stayed and decided the place belonged to them. And now the descendants of the invaders wish there were some way to send rude indigenous people back where they came from, or something.

Wintrich’s Tweet was met with some enthusiasm by one guy, who thinks it’s awfully hypocritical of people to come from foreign lands and wave their foreign flags around here, unless of course it’s an Irish flag in his own Twitter profile:

Most of the replies were a bit more scathing in pointing out that the stupid bigot wasn’t even being a bigot in the right direction — the whole thread is good for a laugh. One set of replies came from a Tweetperson who thought maybe those words were being applied to the wrong foreign intruders:

Our favorite exchange involved a guy who didn’t really seem to understand who the First People on this here continent actually were:

If they don’t look British or Native Indian, then what the hell are they and why aren’t they Making America Great Again, huh? Shouldn’t these decisions be up to The People of America, who really know and love the place?

Finally, the single best reply of all, for our money (19.99, once we get the shirts made):

“Wow, how do you not fall over more?” is now the Official Wonkette Rejoinder to anything written at the Gateway Pundit. That, and “Pay the fuck up.”

UPDATE: Oh, hey! Lucian Wintrich noticed our article, and not only does he not dispute our assessment of his intelligence, he confirms it:

Lucian. Dude. Wow, how do you not fall over more?

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[Lucian B. Wintrich on Twitter]

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  • DainBramage

    We must immediately construct a wall to keep the people from eastern Asia from crossing the land bridge into ‘Murika! Oh, we need a time machine too.

    • Red Bird

      We need a wall to keep the people from Western Europe from sailing across the Atlantic more than that.

  • JMP

    Yes, the white men do break into our countries, steal our resources and do shit like this – along with enslaving the native populations, you can’t forget that part. And that applies not only to North America, but South America, central Africa, southern Africa, Australia, New Zealand, India, Southeast Asia, the Philippines, etc. etc.

    • kaydenpat

      But they want to tell Native Americans to get off their lawn. The nerve!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Yes, but you get to run casinos, so we’re even.”
      — A Trumpkin

      • Celtic_Gnome

        “Not only run them, but turn a profit as well.”

        –Native Americans.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    We should never take our freedumb for granite.

    • laughingnome

      Even if it’s gneiss.

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      So many dullards with heads full of schist.

      • Beanz&Berryz

        Each with a blank slate of a mind, even still

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          And so many people in congress lack the stones to do anything except fuck us all over.

          • Beanz&Berryz

            Without the courtesy of a reach-around

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            Or any of that Kentucky-Jelly stuff!

          • Beanz&Berryz

            Is that why a KentuckY Jelly ad popped up on my browser!?

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            Sorry about that.

          • Beanz&Berryz

            A pretty funny ad… A couple squeezes in an afternoon quicky before the teen kid gets home…

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            They’d need quartz of it.

          • Paul

            Shit, shoulda scrolled down.

      • A Groucho Marxist

        they must have rocks in their head

        (am I doing this right)

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Yes.

          But those are exceptionally stooopid rocks. Copralite, in fact.

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            You’re saying they have petrified poop fer brains?

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            What happens if you don’t shit for a very long time? It turns into hard pebble like turds all compacted together. The same phenomenon happens for people with shit for brains. Many such people have been that way their whole lives. After sufficient time, that shit fossilizes.

            QE fuckin’ D.

          • A Groucho Marxist

            I was hoping that my comment would be so stupid that it was hilarious, but now I’m concerned that people are going to go straight Poe’s Law or equivalent.

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            Naw, most of the regulars here have a sufficiently high grokability level that they can stick to the unwritten secret posting plan that does not exist because comments here are impossible.

        • Rags

          Gneiss!

      • amrak63

        They have lost all their marbles.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          I thought I had the whole escarpment covered, then you come along!

    • Ill-Advised

      Agate idea for space exploitation..ah, exploration!

    • Paul

      Quartz of stupid come out of his mouth when he speaks.

  • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

    This made me laugh so hard that my hernia went “blurgle”. Don’t worry it will go back.

    The cats are nowhere in sight.

    • gallbladder

      What about the cognac?

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        I am out of my “routine” VSOP cognac. Finished that Sunday night. I have an unopened bottle of XO, but that’s going to stay unopened until Donnie is out of office. Last night my cigar was puffed with the assistance of sparkling water. Probably again tonight, as well.

        I need to find something relatively cheap that won’t offend my steep nose angle.

        • gallbladder

          Or sensibilities.

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            Yeah. That, too.

            Well, sometimes, anyway.

        • aureolaborealis

          Someone I know once bought someone else I know a $200 bottle of cognac, which sat in that person’s liquor cabinet until, several years later, in a fit of folksy craftiness, that person used it to make homemade Kahlua with sugar and instant coffee. The ‘Kahlua’ was nasty and got poured down the kitchen sink.
          Jesus wept.

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            That is one cryin’ shame. Always practice your concoctions with the cheapest stuff possible and only upgrade once perfected.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          What’s the word! Thunderbird!
          What’s the price? Fifty twice!
          What’s the action? Satisfaction!

    • John Thorstensen

      Better get that baby fixed, assuming that you can use your Obamaphone to get an Obamacare appointment. You never know when it won’t pop back — and then you’re in Big Trouble within an hour or two.

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        Me and my Dr. are monitoring it closely. You are right, though.

        • John Thorstensen

          Mine was inguinal and fixed laproscopically. It was almost ridiculously easy (quick recovery, lack of complications) though YMMV, of course. I am not a medical professional, and nothing I say should be taken as medical advice (also known in skeptical circles as the “Quack Miranda Warning”.)

  • goonemeritus

    This is what happens when you think you don’t need school learning.

  • Bright Bart

    The Lakota word for white people is “those who steal the fat” because the first white person they ever saw stole into their camp starving in the middle of the night. After he left they went to that tent to see what had been stolen, it was some fat. Been doing it ever since.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      The fat of the land…

    • Red Bird

      Been doing it ever since….to everyone.

  • God Emperor Emeritus

    I have a morbid curiosity of what this guy thinks a First Nations person looks like. I mean, in his mind is it like Bollywood Indian, or Village People Indian, or who knows what else?

    • Christopher Story

      I’m thinking the 1950’s spaghetti westerns

      • SweetDeeKat

        So, Jewish.

        • John Thorstensen

          “Schvartzes! My god, they’re darker than we are!”

          • Werewolf

            “Zei nisht a meshuggener!”

    • Red Bird

      Doesn’t matter either way. He hates both groups.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Maybe that photo of Sitting Bull that’s in every US history book ever? He’s a bit too young to have Tonto in mind.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “They don’t look Native American! Where’s the feather headdresses and the buckskin?”
    — A Trumpkin

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      I don’t not sea Nancy Pelosi!!!!

      • PubOption

        What about Elizabeth Warren?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      “And the teepees! Gotta have the teepees!”

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Yea how come they don’t look like Elizabeth Warren, hennggh?

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
    • armed_bears

      Seems about right.

    • janecita

      He looks like John Mayer.

    • doktorzoom

      That was fast!

      • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

        I’m on constant Photoshop Alert!

        • Ill-Advised

          And skillz at the ready. (Tips hat.)

  • Covfefe

    This is the flag of the Republic of Ireland. (Your buddy Kennedy got it wrong.) https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0999c74f03ec79d4bf18f795c7b32525034acb5ce0ce8702a7dc01fa35159a48.jpg

    • doktorzoom

      Next you’ll be saying the Confederate battle flag didn’t originally have “Lynyrd Skynyrd” or “The South’s Gonna Rise Again!” printed on it…

    • PubOption

      The white is there to keep the green and the orange apart.

  • goonemeritus

    I once flipped off a British guy so both sides do it.

  • goonemeritus

    When do we add Obama to Mount Rushmore?

    • gallbladder

      Not soon enough, I say.

    • kaydenpat

      Give him his own mountain.

  • whitroth

    Deport this asshole sonofabitch back to where his family came from. Or just the middle of the Atlantic, and leave him there in a rowboat.

    • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

      His grandfather is from Poland, which makes him a Polish… Nazi? Weird!

      • Werewolf

        Grandpapa probably told the SS where to find Jews.

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      Probably a bad idea to start another trash island in the Atlantic.

      • gallbladder

        What about on an asteroid?

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Yeah. That’ll work. Astronomers will be able to add the first asteroid with a hemorrhoid to their charts.

    • Red Bird

      Yes, please!

  • janecita
    • WotsAllThisThen

      Heyyyyyyyyyyyy

  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    Lucian Wintrich should be the next White House communications director. He’s more than qualified. Stupid, ignorant and oblivious to his own cluelessness. He checks all the boxes.

    • gallbladder

      Yeah, but does he dot all the I’s with hearts?

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
    • gallbladder

      And always worthy of an upvote.

      • Ernestinarvictor

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !at288d:
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  • JMP

    Wait, how can he be an Irish rebel? The Irish War of Independence ended in 1921, and Ireland has been independent since then; all the rebels who fought in that war have got to be dead by now, as with WWI veterans.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Rebel without a cause.

      • gallbladder

        …or a clue.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Rebellion against sanity.

      • kaydenpat

        And he is winning!!

    • janecita

      Please, like that asshole could even find Ireland on a globe!

      • Buzz1313

        He’d likely be surprised what actual Irish people think of him.

    • Covfefe

      “Rebel,” in Ireland, means Cork City and/or the city’s soccer team. Cork City has been called “The Rebel City” since the 15th Century, when the city supported the Yorkists during the English War of the Roses.

    • John Thorstensen

      Yeah, and they blew up Nelson’s column on O’Connell street back in the 60s, so this is really pretty much done and dusted.

    • Thiazin Red

      My great great grandfather wasn’t an actual Irish rebel so shit bag morons like this could put it on their facebook pages.

  • Wild Cat

    Ya know, before the internet, people generally just bowled, fucked, got high, watched lowbrow flicks, shot craps, and never gave a rat’s ass what assholes like Lucian Wintrich had to say.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    They don’t look native Indian? Does this dullard actually think they all walk around all day with a full headdress and a peace pipe?

    • gallbladder

      I’m betting he also thinks that all Muslims are “darkies.”

    • yyyaz

      Headdresses and tomahawks, war paint, Mohican ‘do.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Hanging out at the casino carving totem poles all day…

    • kaydenpat

      Yes.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Probably thinks they all look like Natalie Wood.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        John Ford libelz! In The Searchers she’s a white captive raised as a Comanche.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        looking like Natalie Wood isn’t such a bad thing, lol

    • DirtyHippyLiberal

      Not to mention that there is quite a diversity of “looks” of Native Americans. The people of the Tohono O’odham tribe in southern AZ looked very little like the people of the Tonto Apache tribe in central/northern AZ. At least those that I knew.

      No, douchebag, they do not all look alike.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Don’t any of these people have real problems that should be occupying their time and outrage?

    Um, don’t answer that, actually…

    • jesterpunk

      No they don’t, thats the problem.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall
  • Bub, the cynical zombie

    Lucian better be careful. Hoft might not like having competition for his “Stupidest Man on the Internet” title.

  • Lyly Sirivong
    • kaydenpat

      That’s exactly how I feel about Columbus. Cannot believe that we honor a man who committed genocide of Indigenous peoples in the Caribbean and throughout the Americas. Disgusting.

      • SadDemInTex

        At least the indigenous people were able to contribute syphilis to the Europeans!

        • Covfefe

          No. Actually, the French introduced syphillis to Europe, though I don’t remember where they picked it up.

          • SadDemInTex
          • SadDemInTex

            From wiki: it appeared in 1494…it cannot be a coincidence

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            It was called the “French disease” in Italy, Malta, Poland and Germany, and the “Italian disease” in France. The Dutch called it the “Spanish disease”, the Russians called it the “Polish disease”, and the Turks called it the “Christian disease”.
            Everybody got it from somebody else!

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Well, it certainly wasn’t me.

  • kaydenpat

    They look Native American to my eyes. Funny how racism blinds you to the truth.

    Love Yardyspice’s tweets. Powerful photos.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    “They don’t look Native Indian at all”- says guy whose only exposure to Native Indians is this

    http://www.indianz.com/News/2013/06/28/victormatureascrazyhorse.jpg

  • jesterpunk

    Speaking of stupid, read the whole thing.

    https://twitter.com/ddale8/status/892478078953324544

    • kareemachan

      holy merde.

  • calliecallie

    Is that a pile of bison skulls or something? That is grotesque!

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      buffalo bones. Americans killed millions during westward expansion.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        As a war measure, to starve out the current residents.

        • anon_the_great

          No, more of a commercial venture that has the added effect of starving out the Plains nomad cultures

          • UncleTravelingMatt

            Sherman specifically ordered the destruction of the buffalo herds for the purpose of depriving the Sioux (and others) of food.

          • anon_the_great

            Ayup, he did. Truth is Sherman did more to clean up the BIA and fight white encroachment on treaty land than any of his contemporaries. I am not minimizing the genocide nor Sherman’s white supremacy but there are better and worse actors in the horror.

          • kareemachan

            I’m thinking Custer on the con side…

      • hendenburg2

        Yeah. Most trains that traveled through the Midwest would stop whenever they came upon a herd of Buffalo so that anyone in the train with a gun could open fire.

        • SadDemInTex

          Yep. Assholes

        • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

          And they would just leave the carcasses to rot.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Hooters has nearly wiped out the flying buffalo, thanks to their all-you-can-eat wing deal

        • Latverian Diplomat

          They have not managed to use up the earth’s supply of silicone, though they are trying.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            orange shorts are a terrible thing to waste…

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            They’re obviously doing the best they can in the face of a severe shortage of orange fabric.

          • boredcatlady

            We HAVE been at war for a long time, rationing shouldn’t come as a surprise. :)

        • Since Hooters features boobs, perhaps Scaramucci can get a job there?

      • kareemachan

        Killed them and wasted most of them. Disgusting.

        • boredcatlady

          IIRC, just for fun and also to fuck over the natives? So much to be proud of my homesteader ancestors.

    • janecita

      Right before they used them as fertilizer.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Huh. They don’t look like Atlanta Braves fans OR Washington Redskin fans. FAKE NEWS!!!

    • Anna Rompage

      Kansas City Chiefs?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Cleveland Injuns.
        Heck, we even let them be mascots for a hockey team! What more do they want?

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      or that ghey college football team from Florida, the Semon holes…

      • Werewolf

        To be fair, FSU does have the permission of the Seminole Nation to use the whole “Chief Osceola” thing. OT, when I was a yute my friends and I were mostly Gator fans, and we would call them the “Half-ass U Semi-holes”.

    • therblig

      you don’t hear the french whining about the miami dauphins.

    • Doug Langley

      or the seminary team from New Orleans.

  • anon_the_great

    Whoever feeds this very special alt-right snowflake ought to stop right now and let nature take its course. Really, it’s more merciful that way.

    • gallbladder

      That or quintuple the dosage of whatever generic cough syrup he’s on.

      • anon_the_great

        No amount of Robofry can make a person that stupid and still breath on their own

      • boredcatlady

        Whatever happened to Purple Drank? Are the kids not into that anymore? Last I remember it was vodka soaked anal tampons for frat boys, but that was a few years ago, I think.

  • therblig

    i’m just angry that illegals can take vacations to mount rushmore.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      TRUMPY!

  • Good_Gawd_Yall
  • Zippy W Pinhead

    Fall over? I’m amazed they don’t all drown when it rains, looking up to try to figure out why they’re wet

  • Major_Major_Major

    Goddamn Indians, acting like they never get nuttin. The kind europeans brought them blankets to stay warm, gives them special rights as to casino’s, and even gave an Oscar to that Gandhi movie.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      and we even let that one guy live in the cupboard

  • Ricky Gay

    Must be surfing the web from within an iron lung.

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      Perhaps, he’s surfing the web from an iron rectum? Poor guy.

      • PubOption

        John Peel?

        Do you ken John Peel with his prick of steel,
        His balls of brass and his cast iron arse,
        Do you ken John Peel with his prick of steel,
        And it’s all hanging out in the morning.

    • Lambsendbeds
  • elviouslyqueer

    There once was an asshole named Wintrich
    Whose intellect was measured in thin sticks
    On the Twatter he wrote
    A dumb racist note
    Thus earning the nickname of “Pen Prick.”

    • Opiwan

      hmmm, I know something else that requires bunches of sticks… tied together…

      • Playing the bassoon?

        • Opiwan

          I was going with something more… fascistic, but to each their own!

  • https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6842751e5842c284152e94d652aaf1b756802c9f05c710b93afd82dcba3fd276.jpg

    Kitteh can only read about conservatives so much before this happens. Kitteh’s record is 45 seconds.

    Kitteh is smarter than Old Man Shadow.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    When I was in high school, a history teacher organized a field trip to the grave of a civilian Army scout who was killed during the Nez Perce War and is buried just outside town. One of my classmates — his mother is Nez Perce — marked the occasion by wearing his “My heroes have always killed cowboys” t-shirt. The principal threatened him with suspension, but good sense prevailed the kid was the star tailback, and you don’t give up an opportunity to claw your way up to seventh in the conference standings.

  • Red Bird

    Irony check. The people from Mexico and other Central American countries are also part of the First Nations. They have more of a claim on the two continents than any descendant of a European ever will. And that is why white Americans worry so much about immigration from the south. A thief can never sleep at night because they know they can lose what they have the same way they got it.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      *Some* of the people from Mexico and CA countries, mind you. In my experience and historically speaking, those countries tend to treat their Native populations like dirt.

      • Red Bird

        I know. That is also part of the reason the majority of undocumented immigrants coming from Central and South America are indigenous. They are mistreated in their homeland by an ingrained European upper class.

  • kareemachan

    And may I point out that a state of Crazy Horse is still unfinished….

    http://www.npr.org/2013/01/01/167988928/the-slow-carving-of-the-crazy-horse-monument

  • darnyoudarnyoutoheck
    • boredcatlady

      NICE! I’m a sucker for old hollywood gifs, and this looks like from a silent?

      • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

        Buster Keaton

  • AmusedAmused

    “They don’t look native Indian either.”

    Hollywood’s ancient tradition of casting vaguely Mediterranean-looking white people to play Native Americans may have something to do with white supremacists’ beliefs as to what “native Indians” are supposed to look like. Although I do think the movie industry took its cues from earlier romanticized portrayals of “noble savages” in 19th-century Western art.

  • Internet Hitler

    Laura Cobanius for president. Or chief.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    They can hop on the first bus back to Calcutta, then.

  • I choose to believe they are just showing Trump that their fingers are longer than his.

  • 3FingerPete

    Lucian reads Wonkette! You should hit him up for some cash.

    And they should. pic.twitter.com/slZPmPPC2H— Lucian B. Wintrich (@lucianwintrich) August 1, 2017

  • Internet Hitler

    Wintrich looks a lot like Keanu Weaves…

    • Doug Langley

      Is he the famous seamstress?

    • Canis Greyhame

      More like Harry Potter’s evil twin. All he’s missing is a pointy little beard.

  • Crystalclear12

    I believe immigration reform should be first in first out.
    Deport the pasty white people!!!

    • ZangoCrudmonger

      Just deport my white ass to where there is universal healthcare, if you don’t mind. That, and decriminalized weed.

      • natoslug

        I’ve been waiting for two years now for someone to deport my to Canuckistan or KiwiLand. STILL WAITING, DAMMIT!

        • gallbladder

          I will adopt you. My mother is also a Kiwi, so you’ll be well-taken care of on all fronts. ;-)

          • natoslug

            Which island do I get to live on? I really like the sound of the South Island.

      • Paperless Tiger

        Just don’t go to Caucasia. You’d hardly recognize the place.

        • Shucky Ducky

          My friend Jim says he won’t go there anymore. It’s a disaster.

    • Claire

      Can we get waivers on that? Because my family’s been here for 300 years and I want back on the boat.

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    After reading this post, I can’t wait for Indigenous People Day to become more commercial.

    • therblig

      This is a line of Indians leaving beautiful Rancho Malario–to make room for YOU! Here’s the beautiful Trail of Tears golf course… (click!)

      • 3FingerPete

        They never come up in the hills!

      • John Thorstensen

        They were so brilliant. No more than 5 seconds, and they hit it perfectly!

  • BadKitty904

    That is some genuinely breath-taking stupidity, right there…

  • miss_grundy

    Don’t tell the bigot that public schools are closed on Pulaski Day in Chicago. He might have a cow.

  • Ezio

    I am reminded of that Paul Mooney quote where he said white people always say they don’t want graffiti on the walls but then they go ahead and carve their faces into a monument on land that wasn’t theirs.

  • natoslug

    They break into our country, steal resources, then do stupid shit like this. And libs still wonder why we are pushing for immigration controls . . .
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f631e55f06bb32f73a85d091f9f93295fa43ab81c73c9c7ad313dcfb6eb5a025.jpg

    There, Lickstain, I fixed yer picture fer ya.

  • TJ Barke

    How does [Insert Harry Potter villain name here] remember to breath?

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Stupidest White House Correspondent On Internet Retweets Tweet Calling Him Stupid.

    And they should. pic.twitter.com/slZPmPPC2H— Lucian B. Wintrich (@lucianwintrich) August 1, 2017

    • TJ Barke

      Doubling down on the stupid.

      • Shucky Ducky

        A black hole, a veritable singularity of stupid. It hurts.

      • mardam422

        When that’s all you know….

    • ZangoCrudmonger

      Sticking to his guns, I see. This should be interesting.

      Grabbing the whiskey.

      • Shucky Ducky

        Choosing his hill to die on, as it were.

        • TJ Barke

          Like a certain General. Buster or something, I think…

        • gallbladder

          Better to lose a battle than a war.

      • Canis Greyhame

        Is a proper mooching too much to hope for with this little weasel? Probably! Why would we expect anyone get booted from the White House press corps these days for being an openly racist shit?

      • Paperless Tiger

        There’s not much point in sticking to your guns after you already shot yourself in the foot.

        • Canis Greyhame

          There’s always the other foot.

    • Canis Greyhame

      Eradicating the native population now? I did nat-see that coming.

    • chascates

      I enjoyed this one in the chain:

      You, sir, are a deeply silly and profoundly unserious human being who
      cherishes his stupidity and ignorance as if they were diamonds.

    • The Wanderer

      No.
      NO, in the name of The Martyrs, NO.
      I categorically refuse to read further, or even to comment on this horrific display of stupidity.
      I am going to have nice baked feesh, with scalloped potatoes and veggies.

      • boredcatlady

        Nice – I went with salmon and squash. Look at us, all healthy and shit. :)

    • meanlawyermom

      Was just coming here to post this!

    • Jennaratrix

      I kind of like the guy who wants to argue which land, exactly, should be given back to various Native American tribes. He’s sassy.

    • boredcatlady

      Well I’m still locked out of twitter (lost phone, grrrr) so thank you for sharing this awesomness. Oh Lucian B. Wintrich, you’re such a tool. But pretty cool he’s a Wonkette fan, amirite? Wondering if one of you commenters (which aren’t allowed) is actually Lucian B. Wintrich? (that’s a very fun name to say out loud, it really kinda rolls off the tongue)

      • SeeTrain65

        Re: Twitter: Same here. No phone. I have several friends on there I miss terribly and I used to play #HashtagWars daily. But now that @midnight is going bye-bye, that’s one more reason I have not to go back.

        • boredcatlady

          As shitty as twitter can be, and holy shit it can be, I was really having fun on there, and had just actually starting to talk with people, or at least, starting to “not block” people when they tried to talk to me. Now from my PC I can see and like some tweets, but I can’t see my DMs, so I’m worried that people think I just bailed on them. :/

          • SeeTrain65

            I had to let people I used to follow (and who followed me) on Twitter know via Instagram that I’d been suspended from Twitter. I think most of them know.

            And yes, you’re right. I’d block anyone left and right if they looked at my page funny. I’d even cruise trending hashtags looking for conservatives and rednecks and neo-nazis and skinheads to block.

            But most of the people I met on Twitter, especially my followers, were some of the most fantastic people I’ve ever encountered. I even had some pretty well-known comedians, actors, actresses, journalists, etc. following me, and usually, I’d follow back.

            And when I was locked out, I was pissed off. But I just come here more often now. It does my sanity much more good.

          • boredcatlady

            I just loved seeing really funny and clever people reacting to life in real-time, that’s what’s neat about twitter for me. There are way less trolls up in here, though, or at least they tend to get banhammered before I run across them, which is a good thing. Seriously, at this point I feel so overwhelmed by the trolling that I can’t tell a sincere person from a chatbot from a hole in my head. When it gets like that, real-world-meatspace is the answer, but since I live in rural KY, the only time I can actually voice my opinions with people who get it is online. Catch-22. (Sad trombone, damn I sound like Debbie Downer -sorry to stir some existential angst into your morning coffee!)

      • Gayer Than Thou

        It’s gotta be a total made-up name, right? We need to figure out the method of determining your right-wing internet “journalist” name. Can’t be your first pet and the street you grew up on, because that’s your porn name.

        • boredcatlady

          I thought it was my middle name and the street I grew up on! Damn, I guess that’s probably why I never made it in the pictures!

          So twitter has a way to ‘verify’ people, can they invent a different checkmark to identify the cool people? As for twitter jerks, awhile back it was so easy because they latched on to Deplorable. But then we’d spit it back ironically, and now everything’s buried under about 10 layers of sarcasm it’s hard to tell. Or maybe I just overthink. (Maybe? hahahaha LOL definitely. :) ) And the left-wing assholes are worse because we tend to speak the same language and have similar references.

  • Shucky Ducky

    Let’s make sure that when Lucian Wintrich is cold, we make sure to supply him with a pile of blankets impregnated with votes.

    • gallbladder

      ..and exotic cold viruses.

    • Major Lee Pissed ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

      And smallpox. Poetic, no?

    • andreamd

      I thought it said “voles”

      • boredcatlady

        poxy voles!

    • kareemachan

      hantavirus?

  • Wes

    They started constructing a big Crazy Horse memorial carved into the side of the nearby mountain as a big fuck you.

    It even has a laser light show!

    • 3FingerPete

      They (white people) have been chipping away at that mountain for over forty years. I suspect it will never be completed.

      • kareemachan

        Over 60 years. My MIL knew the sculptor who started it.

    • mardam422

      It’s really nice, too. Went to see it after I saw Rushmore. Bought one of the rocks they sell at the gift shop that came off the mountain.

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        I have one of those in my aquarium.

    • boredcatlady

      I’ve been wanting to see that for years, gonna have to hit it on my next road trip.

  • Robyn Ryan

    279e3d04e13308f8cb29f6011327c.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/36bca8b1f8014a4d25db50ed21b50565c5127
    9e3d04e13308f8cb29f6011327c.jpg
    Unclear on concept of ‘history.’

  • mancityRed6

    seeing as how my grandfather’s name was Ninian, I don’t really make fun of names so much.
    but then again, anyone who knew him called him “Doc” for some reason.
    and yet, this guy seems to be proud of his name that sounds like it was born from an Anne Rice novel.

    • andreamd

      Ninian- like in the Merlin story- awesome!!!

      • mancityRed6

        I literally had no idea it came from there. Kind of cool, though.

    • ahughes798

      I had an Uncle named Harriet Breckinridge Hughes. HIS mother made fun of my name.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      We had an Elmo among my great-uncles. He went by his last name because he really hated the name Elmo. Not sure why, as he died before the Sesame Street character made an appearance.

  • mardam422

    Well, in his defense, conservatives lately think history started in 2009. So….

    • mancityRed6

      true. that’s probably when Lucian hit puberty.

  • Alexander Stallwitz

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/58c2f72c8417ea8103735bd62bf65d59c5c905c5ec41dea8dc6fe99367721abe.jpg all through To be fair, all brown people look the same to the far Right

  • Ωbjectifier
    • mardam422

      One of my favorite scenes from one of my all time favorite movies.

  • chascates

    What the hell kind of name is Lucian Wintrich?

    • Ducksworthy

      Satanic? Chuthulic?

    • Canis Greyhame

      Sounds foreign to me. I say, Old Bean, let’s send him back across the pond, what!

    • HorseChestnut

      It’s the name of a sad little boy who thought Draco Malfoy was a cool guy.

    • Jennaratrix

      An interesting one, that’s for sure. Since I have an ancestor named Supply Belcher, I’m not going to throw stones. All names, and all words for that matter, were made up; some just a lot longer ago than others.

      • HorseChestnut

        Oh my god I love your ancestor.

        • Jennaratrix

          Right? I’ve been having a field day with that. Had kids named Hiram, Mehitable, Hannibal. My imaginary future children are lucky that I’m past popping-out-babby age or someone would be named Supply. Mehitable if a girl.

          • chascates

            I’m assuming this was over 100 years ago?

          • Jennaratrix

            1700s. Supply was a Revolutionary War veteran.

          • chascates

            Even better!

          • Jennaratrix

            Yeah, this is particularly fun for me as a military historian.

          • HorseChestnut

            [insert joke about me-hit-able. high five.]

          • kareemachan

            Would her twin be called archy?

          • Penny Dreadful Says Cats

            Ooh, pretty sure there’s a Mehitable or two in my genealogy, as well. Now I need to go find Mom’s notebook…

      • chascates

        Supply Belcher is an awesome name!

        • boredcatlady

          I know, I’m impressed too!

        • Lefty Wright

          Still hard to beat Reality Winner, the lady who leaked information on NSA knowledge on the Russia/Trump collusion.

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            Every time I hear about her in the news, it takes me a couple minutes to realize that the reporter is saying a name.

    • The Flaming Carrot

      A made up name for a fake-ass person.

    • boredcatlady

      Kinda sounds like a Twilight villain to me.

    • Alternative Dog
  • Kiri the Unicorn
    • Le Chapeau

      Apaches.

    • Skadi

      I hear the Shadow Wolves have this on a T-Shirt.

      • theCryptofishist

        I’ve seen variants.

  • Jeff Ackerman

    1491 by Charles Mann is a good read if you want to know how life was like in the America’s before Columbus sailed the ocean Blue.

    • Jennaratrix

      1491 is great; unfortunately, 1493 is not as good. Good info, but really scattered.

    • Maggielle

      I had not realized before reading it that so much of the disease-based annihilation of the indigenous peoples occurred in the decades between first contact and subsequent European migration. I need to read more on this, but as I recall, the first settling colonials encountered a vastly different continent than what Columbus saw.

      • Jeff Ackerman

        The people of America at that time hadn’t been exposed to a lot of the diseases the europeans unknowingly bought with them, so no ability to resist smallpox etc. One of the supposedly worst things was the pigs that were lost by the Spanish explorers in the south, they carried many communicable diseases with them. No political unity in the tribes that tried to resist the settlers insured the downfall of them all. Organized groups of people have just about always subjugated others throughout history.

        • Delu

          There was one disease that was also brought over, or maybe it had already been on the continent from the beginning.

          Anyway, that disease has truly begun to flare up to near epidemic levels in America recently, and there’s no cure for that disease either (though it can allegedly be prevented or avoided with education, possibly).

          It’s called “stupidity” and I’m not sure if anyone has heard, but it’s a disease that can wipe out nations given the right circumstances.

          • Jeff Ackerman

            It seems to effect people of the conservative persuasion, I don’t think they want a cure either.

          • Delu

            It affects anyone.

            Some seem to actually embrace it though.

        • Maggielle

          What surprised me was finding out that nearly 90% of the native population had died from diseases even before the influx of European settlers (as opposed to invaders and military expeditions). I don’t have the book in front of me, so I had to go to the wiki:

          …Mann argues that Indians were a keystone species, one that “affects the survival and abundance of many other species”. By the time the Europeans arrived in number to supplant the indigenous population in the Americas, the previous dominant people had been almost completely eliminated, mostly by disease, with a consequent disruption of societies and environmental control. Decreased environmental influence and resource competition would have led to population explosions in species such as the American bison and the passenger pigeon, and because fire clearing had ceased, forests would have expanded and become denser. The world discovered by Christopher Columbus was to begin to change from that point on, so Columbus “was also one of the last to see it in pure form”….

  • nightmoth

    Fuck you, Lucien, you devil-named spawn! Europeans stole that sacred mountain and fucking desecrated it, you idiot. Maybe if somebody shit on the altar of whatever church, synagogue, or mosque you attend (if you even do) you would understand!

    • NotALiar

      Lol mosque

    • theCryptofishist

      Although, I’ve never seen a photo from that distance… It’s different from that close up view that is so often on the postcards, etx.

      • nightmoth

        We saw it from a distance–refused to pay for the up-close view–the Sioux really, really hate it, and why wouldn’t they?

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    there was some mention below of Mexico (ans) in the US prior to us becoming the U.S.

    When I went to college there was a lot of white people who made some assumptions about my beliefs cause I was white.

    As I recall, in those days every Columbus Day the Mexican Students Association used to have sort of a march/protest thing.

    This white guy I was otherwise friends with shouted “Go back to mexico!” I was too much of a wuss then to tell him what I was thinking, “They were here first dumbass!”

    • theCryptofishist

      I feel so damn lucky that I used to live in a town with Indigenous Peoples’ Day.

  • Poly_Ester

    Next, Lucien will want to know why so many Civil War battles were fought in National Parks.

    • wavicles

      And why the Government puts animal-crossing signs on the highways.
      “Why have the animals cross the road there? Have ’em cross where it’s safe.” SMRT

  • AngryNotSoOldHippy .

    What is fascinating is watching all the Christanic Republican dumbfucks post their Christian hatred and, after they get dumped on by other Twitters who “correct” their filthy Republicanism, said rightarded dumbfucks try to DEFEND their hatred by demanding, nu “uh! they ain’t! they’re Mexians, waaaaaah!”

    Fucking right wing snowflakes shit themselves and then try to defend what they just did as “godly” and “American.”

  • Lorindel Ó Loingsigh

    Lucien Wintrich. Sounds like the sort of person who uses antimacassar because he has to.

    • mardam422

      Not me. I’m pro macassar all the way.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        It’s only 6:30. Too oily for that joke.

        • theCryptofishist

          Game, set, match.

          • Geoff Richmond

            You just can’t make this stuff up, people.

  • chascates
    • gallbladder

      “The White House is a real dump.” This coming from a guy who wants to fuck his own kid. Talk about taste and credibility, eh comrades? Also too, then fucking move out already!

      • Who would have thought that Trump would wind up living in government-funded housing?

        • boredcatlady

          I’d prefer he slouch his way to one of Arpaio’s tent city jails, if my taxpayers are funding his domestic bliss. Or maybe a Colorado supermax.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      If by “dump” he means “decorated by someone with taste and an appreciation of history”, then he has a point.

      • SayItWithWookies

        You know it’s not classy unless it looks like someone blew up a bucket of gold leaf in the middle of every room.

        • boredcatlady

          We can all agree that Goldschlagger is the classiest of shots, yes?

    • Le Chapeau

      The fucker is so tasteless that unless something is made of gold, or at least painted gold, he doesn’t like it because it’s not “classy.”

    • Penny Dreadful Says Cats

      Oh, he thinks it’s a dump? I will be happy to personally escort him to the front door and kick his ass to the curb. Fucking asshole.

      • BillEGoatSmirk

        The FBI can deliver the eviction notice along with tiny little handcuffs anytime they’re ready. We’d be fine with that.

    • boredcatlady

      It’s only been a “real dump” since his janky family set up shop.

      • theCryptofishist

        I’m sitting here thinking, Well, at least Nancy Reagan would have canvassed a bunch of her friends and fixed the damn place up again! (It’s a bad, bad thing when people start making Nancy look good to me.)

        • boredcatlady

          Yep, this is where we are now. The bar is so low that those of use who were sentient in the eighties have almost fond feelings for Nancy. Almost

        • cleos_mom

          Imagine the results if Melania and Ivanka decided to outdo Jackie Kennedy in overhauling the White House. I suspect they wouldn’t have historic preservation in mind; can’t imagine why. ;-)

    • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️
      • chascates

        Rush Limbaugh would go nuts over that as well.

      • Serai 1

        That’s the apartment that was used in Devil’s Advocate as the residence of one of the villains. He was a real estate tycoon accused of murdering his wife. He turned out to be having an incestuous affair with his teenage stepdaughter. Trump approved this. Tells you something, doesn’t it?

        • AnnieGetYerFun

          That movie upset me a lot. I still think about it far too often, and get freaked out.

          • Serai 1

            Why? I thought it was great. Watching Al play the devil – clearly the man had WAY too much fun at that job.

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            Kearny Reeves is beautiful, but a terrible actor. All the women in the film were constantly naked or tits-out, but the men were always fully clothed. The demon faces that were etched on the faces of minor characters were actually totally terrifying to me.

          • Serai 1

            “All the men were always fully clothed”? I guess you didn’t notice the scene where KEANU was naked. How did you manage to miss his butt cheeks right in the camera?

          • AnnieGetYerFun

            I admit that I probably quit watching.

  • boredcatlady

    Wait, the Gateway Pundit pays you guys? Is it a nice gig? LOL

    • NotALiar

      No they don’t. AND THAT’S THE PROBLEM

      • fiscal responsibility my ass. They need to pay their debts, the moochers.

      • boredcatlady

        Have you tried sending emails pretending to be Don Jr soliciting donations? :)

      • SeeTrain65

        #PayUpDickhead

        An oldie, but a goodie.

  • amrak63
    • Villago Delenda Est

      Not to mention religious nutcases.

      • amrak63

        http://i.imgur.com/ood0nEL.jpg

        Though let us remember, criminals were sent here, too.

        However, many of the criminals sent to the various British colonies were survival criminals–that is, they would not have turned to crime had sufficiently remunerative jobs and/or a Nordic-style welfare state been available.

        • Australians brag about their convict heritage. An American snob will say their ancestors were on the _Mayflower_; an Australian will say their ancestors were on the first ship into the Botany Bay Penal Colony, for horse theft with menaces.

        • cleos_mom

          But a very high percentage of Europeans didn’t come here due to either religious persecution or failure. Many of them were second sons or daughters who had married second sons. That’s the basis of many a latter-day American claiming to have landed nobility in their family tree.

          That said, antique inheritance laws don’t produce many memorable memes or catchy slogans.

    • V Santa Cruz

      I am so stealing this……. thank you!

    • Dudleydidwrong

      In his 1970 book, The Pursuit of Loneliness: American Culture At the Breaking Point, sociologist Philip Slater wrote that the US was first settled and continually repopulated by people who were not successful in the Old Country. Hard to argue with that thesis, given the Gateway Pundit evidence.

      • Little Lulu Ω

        I loved that book. I had it next to my bed in the 70s; a new lover saw it and became concerned – thought I was pursuing loneliness.

      • cleos_mom

        Well, the mid-1800s potato famine in Ireland had a lot to do with my own recent ancestors coming here. I guess you’d have to say they were too stupid to plant rice.

  • The Flaming Carrot

    He tweeted your article and doubled down. Fuck, it must be painful to be this devoid of brain cells.

    • doktorzoom

      hahahahahaha

      Also,

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    • Delu

      “I know I’m stupid, but you know what? I’m PROUD of it!”

  • OneYieldRegular

    If you’re going to put “Wow, how do you not fall over more?” on Wonkette merchandise, may I suggest embossed lettering on a GIGANTIC shot glass?

    • SkinlessGenderlessMan

      You mean the sort of shot glass pubs put beers in?

      Yes, please!

  • Le Chapeau

    Those folks look like Lakota to me. Also too: Chief Joseph, Tatanka Yotanka (the Sitting Bull) Geronimo, and Red Cloud. Red Cloud 1, U.S. Army 0.
    https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bqoE7k3uUlI/maxresdefault.jpg

    • I was thinking more southern plains myself but you could be right also too.

      • Le Chapeau

        Well, Red Cloud and Sitting Bull were both Lakota, and the Black Hills are their sacred grounds. The Bull was of the Hunkpapa band, and Red Cloud was Oglala. A definitive biography of Sitting Bull is “The Lance and the Shield: The Life and Times of Sitting Bull.”

        • Good point. I was thinking more facial physiology myself, which is problematic what with populations what were forcibly moved about and squished with others over the years.

          • Le Chapeau

            The Northern Cheyenne were deported south to Oklahoma territory, to live with their southern Cheyenne cousins, but they started dying off, and finally made a break for it to try to return home. Mari Sandoz, a prolific writer of the frontier days whose father helped settle the Nebraska Sand Hills country, and who met Sioux veterans of the Custer fight when she was a little girl, when they would visit her father, novelized the story of the Cheyennes’ epic flight in “Cheyenne Autumn,” a book, which though it is a novel, follows the facts faithfully, and takes you inside the consciousness of the people in their tragic struggle. It will break your heart.

          • Le Chapeau

            Geronimo was southwest, Chief Joseph was northwest.

          • Le Chapeau

            The current day Sioux and Cheyenne do not greatly resemble their ancestors from more than a hundred years ago. But the guy on the left, and the guy, or girl, on the right both look like Sioux or Cheyenne. Ironically, the Custer battlefield today is on Crow land.

          • theCryptofishist

            I understood it not to be ironic, but to be put on the land of their traditional enemies deliberately by the BIA.

          • Le Chapeau

            The Crow Reservation is located on traditional Crow lands. It just happened to be where the off-reservation Sioux, Cheyenne and Arapaho gathered for a great Sun Dance. Custer jokes: Custer swore he would ride through the entire Sioux nation. He was half right. When the Indians finally reached Custer, he was very well dressed. He was wearing an Arrow shirt.

      • Le Chapeau

        I misunderstood your comment, but many indians today don’t closely resemble their distant forebears.

    • Debbie the Unpaid Protester

      Living in Minnesota, I recognized those 3 immediately as Native American. Lucien must not get out much.
      The tribes up here are mostly Anishinaabe (Chippewa, Ojibwe) and Dakota (Sioux).

      • Le Chapeau

        I grew up with Senecas, the badass keepers of the Western Door of the Longhouse of the Iroquois Confederacy, and still nobody to mess with. Our town, Salamanca, NY, is located on the reservation, and whites and Senecas all went to the same schools. Sports teams: The Warriors.

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        Typical city elite (Lucy Anne, that is, not you)

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      We have this image as a refrigerator magnet (my mother-in-law bought it for us a trip across the country) where the caption reads “The Original Founding Fathers.”

      • Le Chapeau

        “Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee” tells the story of those four leaders and more.

  • Beowoof14

    I am surprised that guys like that don’t fall out of their Rascals more.

    • TootsStansbury

      Why oh why, when we came out of the trees these fuckers didn’t hit their heads?

      • theCryptofishist

        The cops were coddling them.

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        They did. That’s why they’re the way they are.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        Especially since the trees pushed the fuckers out for being unwanted furriners.

  • The Militant Homosexual Agenda

    It’s pronounced, “Lucy Anne”.

  • UpstateNYObserver
  • Delu

    Well. Proof positive that the xenophobes among the Trumpians truly believed that their ancestors were born and raised on the “sacred soil” of America.

    Not surprising since one of them actually claimed to have had family in America for “over 500 years”.

    He didn’t seem to be of Native American descent either too.

    • javadavis

      It doesn’t always show so much. Mr Javadavis has a couple of tribes he is related to, less than a quarter, it is true, but he looks like he’d sunburn if he peeked out the window.

      • Delu

        Not to mention of course that the “United States of America” came with the signing of the Declaration of Independence in 1776.

        About 240 or so years ago.

        • javadavis

          Maybe we could get Frederick Douglass to explain history to Trump.

      • covfefesumgame0005

        I have ancestors on both sides from different trips on the Mayflower as well as Native DNA, also my great grandmother used to grumble about a n**** in the woodpile so there is that. about and burn really easy too :P

    • cleos_mom

      She certainly looks the part with that straight blonde hair — why hasn’t the WH called?

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fe52cb86fdd0ffd1742d1878267bf719629e9683f4aa2f129d26db1c4158c949.jpg

  • javadavis

    How stupid is Lucian Wintrich? He finds this amusing enough to tweet. And apparently thinks it actually makes sense.
    https://twitter.com/lucianwintrich/status/892502362803273729

    • Delu

      AHAHAHA! Because that cancer was TOTALLY his fault now and he deliberately made it that way! Also claiming to be pro life means that you basically have to be immortal I guess, otherwise you can’t claim that without being a hypocrite….

      Really now, it seems like all of Trump’s followers are dutifully following the example set by their dear leader and wearing their ignorance on their sleeves as badges of honr.

      Of course they were already doing that before Trump, but still…..

      • javadavis

        I wandered around this guy’s twitter thingy for a while. I came away thinking that you cannot tell it from a parody site. Seriously, I sent Dok his tweet of this article (they should go back to Mexico…) with the comment “And they should”
        How in the heck can the Onion stay in business? There is no way they can come up with anything sillier that their targets come up with on their own.

        • Delu

          Yeah well, this was a problem we saw long before it came, and I’m sure the folks at onion also did.

          How do you parody a parody? I guess it MIGHT be possible to come up with something but it’s tough times for the onion because the Trumpians have basically stolen all the best parody lines.

          • javadavis

            I don’t think you can actually parody a parody and going so over-the-top that you can out do this level of OMG would be just disturbing. They would have to go with parodying some of the less stratospheric stuff but doing it with actual humor.
            Fred and George Weasley have paved the way had the right idea. With things being as they are, people want a bit of a laugh. Just, when I see these guys attempting humor it just isn’t funny – when they are, allegedly, serious they can be hilarious. (except for the whole risk to the entire world with these people in charge thing, of course)

          • Delu

            The reason why they aren’t funny when they try to be is because their opinion of humor is laughing AT others, not WITH them. And the “others” just so happen to be people they actually hate, not necessarily people that deserve to be laughed at.

            As for them being laughed at when being serious? Didn’t we just agree on how they are living parodies in of themselves?

    • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

      That’s not funny; it’s cruel.

      • Delu

        Oh it’s funny in the aspect that it makes absolutely no sense at all and implies certain impossible factors as true, see my post below.

        It’s not wishing ill on McCain other than using his ailment to attack his integrity (and doing it wrong).

      • javadavis

        Cruel and stupid. Unless it IS a parody account, and then it is excessively stupid and cruel.

      • javadavis

        It’s deplorable.

    • JCfromNC

      That’s amazingly stupid, but the depressing part is that he found even just 44 people to like it.

      • javadavis

        Eww. Point to you.

    • Odd Jørgensen

      huh, the moron actually list himself as a WH correspondent. Please tell me this idiot is not a credentialed actual WHC.
      According to the bio, only twats ending in L is from Lucian, others are from “staff”, so I guess everybody that works there are fucking morons.

  • chascates
    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Wow OK then

    • Jackie Jones

      He might need all those trans soldiers, if so. Too bad he just alienated thousands of brave VOLUNTEERS. What to do?

  • notaten

    Hahaha. About 2 weeks after the election I was up at the reservation by me buying smokes and a dude with the maga hat was about 2 people in front of me. He was telling the women working there all about how trump was gonna deport them back to where they came from (umm, right here?) Anyhow he was very rude and a total asshole, and I noticed that the women were working very slowly. Suddenly the tribal police showed up, and dude had a taillight out, his license plate light didn’t work, his window tinting was too dark, etc. Cops hauled him off to the station for questions and had his truck towed. I’m sure they kept him there all day. And that’s what you get for being an asshole to a native woman who is the sister of the Chief of the tribal police. I laughed all the way home, the first time I laughed since 11/9.

    • The Flaming Carrot

      Holy mother of fucking sweet schadenfreude. That’s delicious.

    • this country says it’s about

      Even as biased as history and our culture is you would think that people would at least know who was here first. Dude there is lucky the tribal police didn’t feel “threatened” like the killers of Tamir Rice and Philando Castile did.
      But all in all, sounds like they gave Dude a nice slap on the pee-pee – good on them!

      • Jackie Jones

        Give it time, and they’ll claim Native Americans hate liberals.

    • Jackie Jones

      That is the best story ever.

    • SeeTrain65

      Where are they going to deport them to? Manhattan?

      • cleos_mom

        Siberia would be more likely. Trump’s Russian puppetmasters might have an objection or two.

    • Calli Arcale

      Holy cow that is hilarious. :-D He got what he deserved.

      I’m just utterly baffled how many people genuinely don’t realize Native Americans were here before white people. I mean, that’s a level of confusion that I can’t comprehend.

  • chascates

    And speaking of the SMOI/SWHCI and in which has Seymour Hersh gone round the bend?:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/15b6763ea9b0f67bc6b7eb96b19f663406b3e711007c721b1ac5818bb39d1192.jpg

    • harryeagar

      Let’s see the docs, Sy

    • SeeTrain65

      Cassandra Fairbanks isn’t playing with a full deck, either.

  • Zyxomma

    Most of my SD friends are Lakota. This is SO radically beautiful!

  • (((fka_donnie_d)))

    Aaand this guy is officially the worst person on earth, at least today.

    https://twitter.com/lucianwintrich/status/892502362803273729

    • Delu

      Already posted below. His tweet makes absolutely no sense even as an attack on McCain’s integrity. So he’s a hypocrite because he claims to be pro life and yet is dying? So him dying is a deliberate and CONTROLLED act of his? And doesn’t that also imply that anyone who isn’t immortal but pro life is technically a hypocrite? (meaning all pro lifers are hypocrite?)

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        He has no point, he is just trolling.

        • Delu

          And showing how stupid he is while doing so.

          I mean he just called all pro lifers hypocrites, like really?

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            I don’t think it’s a good use of calories, trying to make rational sense of this (no offense).

            Pearls before swine…Fool according to his folly…

            etc.

            https://i.imgflip.com/1tfso8.jpg

          • Delu

            Oh I don’t know. Making sense of this actually reveals what an epic fail the whole thing is on Lucian’s part. It’s so much of a fail it’s actually funny.

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            Epic fail implies trying. Trolling does not try to make any argument or convince, just to provoke a reaction. The more reasoned argument you respond with, the more the troll is validated.

          • Delu

            Nah even trolling has to come from a particular direction, I mean when he posted that, it was clearly meant to be a jab at McCain’s integrity, about how he is a hypocrite (because of the healthcare vote of course). The INTENT is there to put McCain in that position, whether it was meant as a trollpost or not.

            But what he ACTUALLY accomplished, to any sane rational individual, is the following:

            1.) Implying John McCain got cancer because he deliberately CHOSE to get cancer (and is dying of it because he wants to).

            Yeah that’s a totally sane and reasonable assumption to make.

            2.) Getting pro life COMPLETELY wrong, and it’s supposed to be a core tenet of his party too!

            Protip for Lucian, being pro life doesn’t mean being anti dying, because dying isn’t actually something we can abstain from by choice, in case he hasn’t noticed.

            3.) Because of getting pro life completely wrong, he inadvertently calls all pro lifers hypocrites.

            Since no one can abstain from death, no human is immortal, that means all pro lifers are going to die some day, indeed, they are “dying” even now. Every day that passes is one day closer to our deaths, this is the case for EVERYONE. Since none of the pro lifers can abstain from death, which is pretty much what he “defined” (wrongly) pro life to mean, that would make them all hypocrites by his wrong definition of pro life.

            So he not only fails to label McCain a hypocrite, but succeeds in saying a callous stupid about how McCain suffering from cancer is totally his deliberate choice, gets pro life all wrong and calls the whole lot of them, who are mainly from his party, hypocrites by doing so.

            Thus revealing that he’s not simply an asshole, but a callous and stupid asshole to boot.

            If he was intending to troll himself, I’d call THAT a success, but he wasn’t.

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            No, he just got you to type several paragraphs. Which is what he wanted.

          • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

            With emphasis on stupid, as in, Not Even Wrong.

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            If you saw somebody playing Hitler onstage, you wouldn’t try to explain to him that Genocide is bad, would you?

          • Delu

            Which was not the point at all, but whatever.

            No one was explaining to any Hitler about any Genocide if that makes you feel better.

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            Example of performance intended to elicit emotional response

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))
    • willi0000000

      simple explanation . . . this is a fine example of conservative “humor.”

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        zactly

    • The Flaming Carrot

      He lied to us. He said he was immortal.

      • Professor Fate

        that’s all they wanted, not much to ask for…

  • OrdinaryJoe

    “How does that white man not fall over more?”, they said to each other in their ancestral Lakota.

  • arglebargle
  • covfefesumgame0005

    BTW got cleared by the docs to go back to work a couple of weeks ago and now I ma on a new project! YAY! unironically at a hospital! not a Kaiser one (I have their insurance and love Kaiser) but still one of the biggest in the area. I know it will disappoint you all that I won’t be on as much to spread mu (un)wisdom and (barely) humor…LOL not really, but I am just happy to be able to work again after almost a year.it took that long, and a cancer scare, after my ITA (lost my right side for a long time, scary shit) to prove it is unlikely I will have another. lots of pills, of course I credit all the pot I have been smoking with it :P (psst, don’t tell my docs!). anyway just checking in and then off to bed real soon.

    • phoenix00

      Congrats! And keep on keeping on!

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      Wonderful news.

  • Serai 1

    My retort to something like that is always “How do you find your feet in the morning?”

    • Pisto75666

      Compasses DO come in handy after all!

      • cleos_mom

        “But that little needle keeps pointing to ‘N’. “

        • Pisto75666

          I’m surprised the needle doesn’t just spin.

    • Le Chapeau

      Chewing gum is highly dangerous for them, as it interferes with their concentration on walking.

  • Fifth-and-a-Half Element
  • Duke Woolworth

    That’s a current model Cleveland Indians cap on the guy on the left. What does that mean?

  • Jackie Jones

    Once again, I am reminded of a friend who complained about all the Mexicans in El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Ángeles del Río Porciúncula

    • Le Chapeau

      Americans of the moron persuasion have no idea that southwestern “Mexican” Indians and Hispanics and Mestizos have been living in what is now the United States for 500, 600 years, and the Indians themselves for thousands.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      In a state called “California,” alongside other cities called Santa Barbara, San Francisco, Santa Monica, San Clemente, Montebello, La Jolla, Corona del Mar, Laguna, Pasadena, Santa Cruz, Sacramento….. I think about that all the time when residents of “Montana” or “Arizona” or “Tempe” or “El Paso” or folks living along a river called “Rio Grande,” or in a state fucking CALLED New MEXICO, complain about the people who’ve been here generations and generations before their ancestors immigrated here to pan for gold or some other grift. PEOPLE ARE SO STUPID

  • (((fka_donnie_d)))
    • SeeTrain65

      “He’s dumbing down.”

    • Richard Girlswin

      Thoughtful of him to include the donation banner!

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        I must compliment you, sir, on your choice of “family” name

        • Richard Girlswin

          Thanks! I usually just go by Dick.

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            Dick Girlswin is somehow even more epic.

          • amrak63

            Is that some futanari thing?

          • (((fka_donnie_d)))

            Just say the last name slowy. Pause between the syllables.

    • Le Chapeau

      He actually thinks they’re Mexicans.

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        They are The Brown, they should not be here

    • Calli Arcale

      The mountain is in South Dakota.
      Dakota.
      DAKOTA.
      As in, these people.
      There are not enough facepalms in the world for this guy.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Wait. I thought the modern-day white Americans are the descendants of the inhabitants of Noah’s Ark after the floods receded.

    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Noah way, Jose!

      • Le Chapeau

        RIMSHOT and upvote.

    • andyk304

      I think that’s Mormons…Or maybe Scientologists…But I’m a commie pinko atheist, so what the fuck do I know?

      I’m going back to Mexico now.

    • Carole

      We are. But Noah’s Ark is in Covington, Kentucky, so that’s where we all landed when the flood receded.

      • ez

        and the smart ones quickly left Kentucky in the distance behind them.

        • The Flaming Carrot

          Yeah. My ancestors made it all the way to Indiana and West Virginia.

          • ez

            Montani semper liberi…yup, I moved from the DC ‘burbs (Montgomery County) to WV in 1970. While I am currently living in the UK , still have the home in West Virginia, returning in a year or so.

  • SeeTrain65

    #PayUpDickhead #AndYouTooLucyAnne

  • Sharon Cooper

    How do these people remember to keep breathing in and out?

    • HogeyeGrex

      Shh. Don’t remind them.

    • pbeeg

      They have these CPAC machines…

    • Grokenstein

      They have both steps written on their hands. (In permanent ink now, because of that incident when one of ’em washed his hands and almost died.)

      • Le Chapeau

        Several have been severely injured while trying to eat with a fork.

  • Mecha343

    Not only Lucian is the Stupidest White House Correspondent, but also the 2nd Stupidest person on the Internet.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    I just want to know who ties his shoes for him? The stupid burns, folks, it’s like a caustic brain rinse.

    • Oblios_Cap

      He only wears crocs. With black socks.

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        He seems like the type. He probably wears them with khaki shorts too.

  • pixeloid

    Why would Native Americans be sent to Mexico? Maybe Russia, if you believe the Bering Strait land bridge theory,

    • the_steamer

      I can’t believe the world is older than 6,000 years so your “theory” is meaningless.

    • Le Chapeau

      The Dumbass thinks they’re Mexican, not Indians.

      • pixeloid

        In the heads of Republicans, there are only 5 kinds of people: Mexicans, Muslims, commies, thugs, and white conservative Christian ‘Muricans.

        • Le Chapeau

          The irony is that the U.S. southwest has been home to brown people for many hundreds of years before we showed up.

  • georgiaburning

    Please excuse my avatar, he tried to be a just man for his times. Here’s the monument where the family spent the most time on our visit: http://www.visitrapidcity.com/sites/default/files/styles/category_square/public/SquareListings_CrazyHorse.jpg

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      I really wish they’d finish that thing.

      • Le Chapeau

        Takes a while. Big mountain. Expensive.

        • AnnieGetYerFun

          I visited in 1997, and no progress has been made in the following 20 years. There’s some big legal tie-up with family feuds and crap. I don’t think it will actually ever be completed.

    • Richard Girlswin

      Bill Maher?!

    • Le Chapeau

      Yeah, your avatar isn’t on the Indians’ Greatest Hits list. I admire him greatly as a Civil War general, but not so much as an Indian fighter. Product of the times.

  • phoenix00

    Lucian. A Idiot.

    • Ernestinarvictor

      Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !at287d:
      On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
      !at287:
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  • UnsaltedSinner
    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      NO ONE WAS BETTER AT PRATFALLS THAN OUR BUSTER

      • lurch394

        But Buster was acting. These fools can’t help it.

  • Mary Jo DiBella

    Confuses the hell out of me. I look at the picture and what I see is, three Native Americans making an obscene gesture at some graffiti carved into a sacred mountain by a bunch of illegal immigrants. Well, that’s how they’d view it, anyway. And they’ve got a valid point. Everyone is an immigrant in the minds of the people who lived there first. Did some fool interpret it differently?

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      Yes, of course. The moron thinks his people own the country, and that these are those Messicans being RUDE to his people. He literally doesn’t understand what the picture is

    • lindalegs

      Like Ya’aahhh!

  • Jasper Avelis
  • Lily412

    How we haven’t carved the McDonald’s logo into the moon yet, I’ll never know. It’s definitely not because humans have dignity and restraint.

  • First mistake, US Indians didn’t give enough maps out so the Europeans could find their way back to their homes in India.
    https://media.giphy.com/media/fqYvaWqzUe2w8/200w.gif

  • Empress of the Iguana People

    Good lord, lol. I’d worry about the quality of that dude’s social studies teachers, except I’m pretty sure he spent the whole time doodling on his textbook.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      The point at which we started allowing home schooling, without supervision or checks from the state, was the point where we started to slide back into this kind of pig-ignorant barbarism.

  • Another sign of white blindness. All {INSERT RACE HERE} look alike to me because I never actually deal with {INSERT RACE HERE} due to my racism and xenophobia.

    • Other races do it, too. We see it as white in the USA because of the predominant white “culture.” I lived in Asia as a boy, and saw it there.

  • Iff subject sort of, but look to the right of Lincoln’s head, doesn’t that look like the perfect place to put Donnie J.? That bit of rock already sorta looks like him and his weird hair.

    • lindalegs

      Hell NO! All likenesses (Except the wonderful ‘sculptures’ some clever artist made of him naked, little winkle and all! They should stay, just to remind voters how bloody stupid they were!) should be destroyed or burnt!

  • cleos_mom

    “Native Indian”? That would mean someone born in India. What do they have to do with it?

    IMO “Native American” isn’t exactly a good substitute for “Indian” since “American” is derived from an Italian name. Nevertheless, “Indian” applied to natives of the two continents made no more sense than calling them Australians or Japanese.

    • pluky

      I like the Canadian formulation “First Nations”.

    • Le Chapeau

      To clarify, American Indians call themselves Indians. They have their own “Indian Country Media Network.” I grew up with Seneca Indians, and they referred to themselves as Indians when not specifying Seneca. Don’t sweat the nomenclature. It seems to matter more to palefaces like us than to them.

      • Ranina

        I did quite a bit of writing and research on “multi-cultural” issues 20 years ago. I was really impressed when we asked an Ojibwa Chief what he preferred we call them. He said (something to the effect): “People.” We don’t worry about it. What would you like us to call YOU?

        • lurch394

          In the Southwest “di-ne” is a good one, since it seems to mean “the people” in both Navajo and Apache. I kind of like what Canada does: “first nation.”

      • 76tarabytes

        Older natives don’t mind the term “Indun” but younger of us like being called natives or our tribal names.

        • Le Chapeau

          Thanks for correcting me. In my lifetime I have seen my Seneca friends become highly invested in their culture and traditions, and welcome other tribes and nations in annual powwows. And field a championship Iroquois lacrosse program. This is part of a trend that has been seen across the country. The Senecas have some monetary advantages, such as owning the land my hometown was built on and reaping lease fees, and they have built a 900-room hotel and casino. And they are not pushovers. When the original paltry 99-year lease was up, they negotiated a far better one for themselves, and they fought New York State to a standstill over taking their land for the Southern Tier Expressway right of way, not to mention beating the state over their right to sell tobacco products without imposing and turning over the state tax. They lost a lot of land when the Kinzua dam was built and put much of it underwater in the early ’60s. The government paid them “compensation” for it, and the Senecas took that money and invested it in grant writers and lawyers, with which they have beat the state with its own treaties.

          • SeekingCovfefeBarbie

            Good.

    • Cornelius Fussbudget

      Reportedly they don’t mind being called Indians, but it always seemed the most respectful to me to call them Algonquin, Cherokee, Shawnee, etc whenever possible. Whatever they called themselves. The only reason we need to lump them together is that they all got overrun by the same country.

  • cleos_mom

    There’s an existing, and excellent, term for Trump’s taste that’s rarely used anymore: “trumpery”.

    • Le Chapeau

      That’s a good old word. Upvoted.

    • HooverVilles

      Yes have seen this many times and have posted as well.
      Thanks for bringing this up again!

      For those who don’t know,

      trump·er·y
      ˈtrəmp(ə)rē/Submit
      archaic
      noun
      1.
      attractive articles of little value or use.
      adjective
      1.
      showy but worthless.
      “trumpery jewelry”

      Everyone, make use of this word bigly!

      • thenextday

        “little value or use” absolutely! “attractive”? No way – guy makes me dry heave. “showy but worthless” that fits the bill definitely.

    • Cornelius Fussbudget

      Wow, I didn’t make that connection before, but you’re right! French “tromper”: to deceive. The closest English cognate I can think of with is “trompe l’oeil”.

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5fc5751cb62c18e182370761ee77b982d12c3935fbcce004acb45bc49145982c.png

      • lindalegs

        It’s also ‘Make a mistake’. And didn’t the voters do that!

    • qadesh

      thank you for the reminder!

  • Professor Fate

    I mean there is missing the point and there is missing the point and then there is this guy who deserves his very own phylum of stupid.

    • lindalegs

      Thanks. I like learning new word……………….. and you’re right!

  • Seems more forceful without the ?, like in the original tweet.

    “Wow how do you not fall over more” is like “wat”, in that removing the question mark transforms the interrogatory to the accusative.
    http://i.imgur.com/8mK6GsV.png

  • Hazel Blumberg

    Yup. Sooooo many moronz in this grate kuntree of ourn bleev that the white foakz wuz here first. Um, nope. Try Native Americans, who’ve been here for thousands of years. Geeez, folks. Did you sleep through Murcan history? Or is that what they teach you in Texas?

  • David Rice

    “And stop speaking Athabaskan, you goddamned Mex’cans!”

    • JCF

      I don’t think Lakota is Athabaskan? (I believe that’s language family of the Navajo/Dineh)

  • Republican Scientific Expert

    Wow! Just wow!

  • ky ho

    Lucy B. Witch, you dumb fucking xenophobic fukwit!

  • A Bashful Nobody

    This would be freaking hilarious if it were not so sad. What a maroon.

    • lindalegs

      Poor thing. It’s not his fault. He left skul after 3rd grade!

  • Teto85
  • ccurtisp

    Lucian Dear – Go Bannon yourself.

  • handyhippie65

    mebbe we should send him a helmet fer crimmas. that way he doesn’t get any stupider from all the falls.

  • Angel Miguel

    Marty! Guess who? Keep up the good work. I’m now in Colorado, but how’s Boise doing? Home of FRONTLINE’s Michael Kirk.
    #govandals #borahlions #boisejuniorcollegebronocs

  • qadesh

    Dear Goddess, how in the HELL do those ignorant twits keep breathing????? My deepest thanks to all the lovely people who responded to those morans (sp. deliberate)

    hey, mouth-breathing, knuckle-draggers– I would suggest reading a history book, but then I remembered that you ignorant jerks cannot read with any real comprehension.

    • kareemachan

      And kushner just advocating for not reading history by saying he didn’t need no stinkin’ history to completely turn the Middle East around.

      sigh

      • qadesh

        it is too early to start drinking–I had forgotten that bit of stupidity.

        • lindalegs

          No it’s not!

          • qadesh

            oh, thank goodness!! (grabbing the bottle off the shelf now!)

    • Todd20036

      There is a tree somewhere that is pumping out oxygen for this idiot to breathe.

      He should apologize to it.

      • qadesh

        and then the tree should drop a really large limb on him!

  • Baal

    Hi ho Silver!

  • Rafe Husain

    1.5 trillion lost in stupid conservative supported iraq war that gave us isis. yet conservatives accet no responsibility even as they push about personal responsibility

  • waggaze

    Euro trash tried their best to kill all of our ancestors due to greed and trying to convert us to their sky god but we resisted. Today we still stand because our ancestors resisted and our current generation of warriors reflect that same determination. They make me proud as they should other real NDNs.

  • Boy Elvis

    This Wintrich humanoid comes across as a fame obsessed troll. Gay Christian twinks for Trump? Please.

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