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This is Nurse Rebecca Zaman. She works at A Place For Women, a crisis pregnancy center in Oahu, Hawaii. Nurse Rebecca is a nice lady who jams vaginal ultrasound wands into pregnant teenagers for Jesus. Here, let her tell you about it herself!

Did you catch her saying, “If you’re not very far along in your pregnancy, we’ll also need to do a vaginal ultrasound?” Well, Nurse Becky was kinda fibbing right there. She doesn’t need to do a vaginal ultrasound. She wants to do it, because that’s the only way to get an image of an embryo before about seven weeks pregnancy when it can be picked up on a regular abdominal ultrasound. And Nurse Becky wants to print out a photo of “your baby” today! So put your feet in those stirrups, little lady, because it’s time for a vaginal probe! Sure it’s unpleasant and you might bleed a little bit after. Guess you shoulda thought about that before you had sex now, huh!

A real medical care provider like Planned Parenthood might do a transvaginal ultrasound to determine if a patient is a candidate for a medication abortion. An obstetrician might perform one to diagnose uterine fibroids or an ectopic pregnancy. But A Place For Women isn’t a medical care provider, although it has a nurse and a radiologist on staff. It’s actually a church called Calvary Chapel of Pearl Harbor that preys upon women who are too poor or scared or alone to access real medical care. And once Calvary Chapel has told a vulnerable pregnant woman that abortion will give her breast cancer and cause her to commit suicide before spending eternity in hell, they send her on her way with a framed ultrasound image and a bunch of pamphlets. As the good Lord intended!

Nurse Becky came to our attention because her employer is suing the State of Hawaii over its new law requiring Crisis Pregnancy Centers to post this three-sentence notice in their waiting areas.

Hawaii has public programs that provide immediate free or low-cost access to comprehensive family planning services, including, but not limited to, all FDA-approved methods of contraception and pregnancy-related services for eligible women. To apply online for medical insurance coverage, that will cover the full range of family planning and prenatal care services, go to mybenefits.hawaii.gov. Only ultrasounds performed by qualified healthcare professionals and read by licensed clinicians should be considered medically accurate.

Forcing a radiologist and a nurse to tell women that they can access real medical care! This aggression will not stand, man!

State sponsored anti-life activists are so in love with abortion that they want to suppress the free speech rights of pro-life pregnancy centers in Hawaii and force them to become abortion referral agencies. They cannot tolerate the existence of life-affirming pregnancy centers that give mothers contemplating abortion hope and support as they are empowered to choose life.

Yeah, CPCs are the real victims here! Their sky god ordered them to keep women away from doctors who will provide actual care, and those heathens in the Hawaii state house won’t let them do it!

Calvary Church is also GRRRR, SO MAD that Hawaii gave women the right to sue CPCs that disclose personal medical information to third parties. Rewire reports,

“We’ve had instances here … the centers have used personal health information that patients disclosed to contact their employers and families to intimidate them not to pursue an abortion,” said Dr. Shandhini Raidoo, an OB-GYN in Hawaii, who has seen patients from these centers.

After visiting A Place For Women in 2014, college student Megan Trube found herself signed up for weekly email updates from an online pregnancy website. When she testified in support of Hawaii’s bill, the lobbyist from A Place For Women attempted to read parts of Trube’s medical record in open Senate session. Holy HIPAA Violation, Batman!

Calvary Church’s fake clinic is associated with the National Institute of Family Life Advocates (NIFLA), and both are plaintiffs in the lawsuit against the state of Hawaii. But NIFLA knows damn well that the First Amendment argument is junk, since the Ninth Circuit just told them in October to GTFOH with that shit. The state has the right to regulate the practice of medicine, and a state-licensed doctor and nurse have no First Amendment right to lie to women. This means you, Nurse Rebecca!

Calvary Church also peddles post-abortion “recovery classes,” where some lunatic beats a woman over the head with the Bible until she agrees to redeem herself by ambushing vulnerable girls who wander in for a pregnancy test. PROBABLY.

College student Trube testified that her 2014 visit to A Place For Women included a lengthy “counseling” session with four women who browbeat her with their own tales of guilt over past abortions.

They asked me how far along I thought I was, if I was in a committed relationship, what my religion was, if I was considering an abortion, and if I believed that life began at conception. After all of the questions, the women proceeded to tell me their personal stories about abortion and how they wish they never would have gotten one and put the baby up for adoption instead.

Were these graduates of the church’s re-education sessions? Safe bet!

And now we are sad, thinking about girls who wander in there looking for medical help, only to be captured by fundamentalist loons in lab coats. And we’re angry that Nurse Rebecca is inflicting that vaginal probe on people who don’t know that they should get dressed and run away. And, as a parent of teenagers, Your 5$F is wondering what kind of asshole allows her child to fall into the clutches of these charlatans? If your kid is so alone that she winds up in a place like that, you need to sit down and have a think about how you failed your child!

But all that is depressing. So let’s watch this video about crisis pregnancy centers from the amazing Lizz Winstead and the Lady Parts Justice League’s Vagical Mystery Tour, which your Wonkette covered last month.

Feel better? GOOD. Now go call your Senator about this fucking monstrosity of a health bill! DO IT NOW!

[Rewire / Rewire, again / Healthline / Hawaii Statute / NIFLA / NIFLA v. Harris, the 9th Circuit decision / A Place For Women, site]

Wonkers, we need you to fund our salaries! This shit is hard!

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  • MynameisBlarney

    If only these bible thumpers could mind their own fucking business.

    • ArgieBargie

      We are not persecuting them hard enough, apparently. We are gonna need more lions.

      • Oblios_Cap

        They want to be martyrs without doing any of the hard stuff.

      • (((fka_donnie_d)))

        When was the last time a (white) church got burned, or even vandalized?

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      And what sort of fun would that be?

  • Scooby

    There has to be a genetic component to religious zealotry. I mean the Europeans who came here did so because of religious zealotry.

    • Me not sure

      They made the mistake of telling the zealots where they were going. They will stalk you.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      They didn’t come here to escape persecution. They came here to persecute without interference.

      • Scooby

        I agree, then they intermarried only within thier sect. Both passing along and mental illness they had and narrowing the gene pool to create new anomalies.

  • Treg Brown ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

    I need to keep my fucking mouth shut about this bullshit.

    She’s a disgrace to the entire medical profession.

    • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

      If she was a member of it.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Villago Delenda Est

    I hate these people. They are evil.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    I thought HIPAA violations carried the wrath of (secular) God, or something?

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    So put your feet in those stirrups, little lady, because it’s time for a vaginal probe! Sure it’s unpleasant and you might bleed a little bit after.

    And the difference between being pro-fetus and pro-anything resembling actual human life could not be made more clear…

    http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3wuex3KI71ro7f7oo1_500.gif

  • Antonin Dvorak

    She isn’t even a nurse, is she.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Cavalry Chapel is a blight on Christianity. We have a few of them here. I remember going to one with my sister. They’re auditoriums are so big that they have big screens like your’ at the Staples center. I went with my sister one time. During the mass or whatever I got up to use the bathroom and an usher blocked me from leaving. They said no one was allowed to leave during the mass or whatever.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      “Fine, I’ll stay, but my piss is leaving. Stand back, fucker.”

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      They could demand tithing at any minute, and they can’t let you miss that part. They’ll take your money, even if you’ve peed yourself.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      That is, I believe, some variety of forcible restraint. Which cops are NOT big on, ‘church’ or no.

  • FlownΩver

    Are you sure the commenting rules are still active? Really? Because this calls for an exception bigly.

  • Indiepalin

    There is only one road to Heaven: The TransVaginal Highway (much of which is paved with gravel)

    • therblig

      is that a toll road?

      asking for a friend.

  • Bananas Foster

    OT personal story.

    My high school best friend, a serious Jesus freak, managed to have two abortions during high school. I gave her the money for one of them.

    When I was raped during my first semester of college, I called her for support. She, not so gently, tried to convince me it was my fault because I was alone in the guy’s dorm room and that if I got pregnant, I should seriously consider adoption.

    (No, she didn’t convert after her own abortions. Somehow her choices were special and different and “just this one time,” except, you know, again…)

    I honestly assume every woman working at “Crisis Pregnancy Centers” is a carbon copy of my ex friend. Those women have a lot to answer for.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      God. Awful. So sorry you went through that.

    • ariel_gee_398

      There’s a special place in hell for hypocritical, judgmental women who think the only good abortion is their abortion.

    • Me not sure

      The ability to condemn in others what they forgive in themselves defines modern American conservatism to very large degree.

    • OneWhiteWhisker
    • rosenbomb
  • capnkrunch

    How are those places even legal?!?! Someone needs to sue her and the clinic for battery.

    Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Everything is terrible.

  • Michael R
  • armed_bears

    I am not a woman… but here’s my comment:

    It would be hard for that Jesus crew to pull off this level of assholery if the patient had an advocate with her… Any man that makes his significant other deal with these dingle-berries on her own is a coward. And anyone who puts a woman in this position without owning the responsibility is not a man.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Unfortunately, there are too many who run away and avoid all responsibility. They usually have a strange understanding of human reproduction, and claim “She got herself pregnant.”

      • armed_bears

        Agree: not a man. Ridicule required.

  • ariel_gee_398

    CPCs have inviolable free speech rights that mean they can’t be forced to tell the truth to people who are tricked into walking through their doors, but actual medical providers can be forced to lie to women and read absolute bullshit scripts about the fake risks of abortion and contraception. Even Orwell couldn’t have dreamt that up.

    • Dick St. Dipshit

      Fundagelicals have always been at war with your uterus.

      • shivaskeeper

        And reality, and science, and objective truth. and…

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    “We’ve had instances here … the centers have used personal health information that patients disclosed to contact their employers and families to intimidate them not to pursue an abortion,” said Dr. Shandhini Raidoo, an OB-GYN in Hawaii, who has seen patients from these centers.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2416a17ac2c1c77acac2cd35d37791c9e84b78653d3ae47f5afdb05321241d7f.png

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Yup. HIPPA applies to these maggots. Sue them into penury.

  • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

    You know, if you have to lie, deceive and commit outright medical fraud to get “your message” out…maybe the problem is your message?

    • OneWhiteWhisker

      It’s the Christian way!

    • shivaskeeper

      Lying for Jesus is a time honored tradition for them.

      What they have never made the connection on is that if they will lie for a “good” reason they will easily lie for a “bad” reason and sooner rather than latter they won;t be able to tell the difference.

      • Suttree

        Hence their fear of Muslims lying. It’s always projection!

  • Did somebody explain to Nurse Becky her patient is not a lady slut teen girl but is in fact a TEDDY BEAR?

    Does she for a small extra fee check to see if your Special Princess’ stuffed toys are also maybe DIRTY TOILET DEVIL SLUT WHORES FILLED UP WITH JESUS BABBIES?

    • therblig

      Guilt-A-Bear Workshop

    • OneWhiteWhisker

      I dunno, that bear looks like it’s been around, if ya know what I mean.

  • memzilla Ω

    I like the idea of Hawaii’s three-sentence disclaimer, but in my world, there would be a sign with two-foot tall letters on the door of every one of these CPCs:

    THIS CENTER IS NOT A LICENSED MEDICAL FACILITY
    AND DOES NOT OFFER HEALTH CARE SERVICES

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      I could also go with something similar branded on the foreheads of the staff.

      • Ghenghis McCann

        That would have to count as “the small print.”

    • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

      How about protesters marching out front every day? Seems appropriate.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Jesus. It’s on all fronts, isn’t it?….

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Yup.

  • pgjack

    I am not disgusted by all Christians but the Christians exposed in this piece are disgusting. They are no different than the Taliban or any other fanatical religious gang.

  • Joe Beese

    I’m not going to make it through today without some palliative kittens.

    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-k7q0v3-_8Pc/TcqupVw38SI/AAAAAAAAHXw/xkWIEdL_bEQ/s1600/kitten+in+shoe.jpg

  • Vincent Ricola

    There is no difference between the Calvary Chapel and the gentleman who was doing healthcare in his hoarder trailer. They are both terrible, dangerous, untrained, and wrong.

    https://wonkette.com/620661/late-sovereign-citizen-fake-doctor-did-surgeries-in-this-hoarder-trailer-funtimes-lol-oh-wait-jesus-christ

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5dd6119cf687f8b8a86b4582f2e5534000b4d71e2cadf3a69c8142a1d4ca5b4b.jpg

    • armed_bears

      Great observation.

    • thixotropic jerk

      Wait a minute, this guy was also a porn star and an escort so give him some credit for a more diverse portfolio!

      • Erala Contratista

        Star?????!!?

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist
  • dslindc

    A Christian Shaming Center™️ in the tropics? They must be trying to compete with that beachfront Abortionplex™️!

  • Oblios_Cap

    Americans are certainly still exceptional. Exceptionally Stupid.

  • Suttree

    If you still feel bondage, inner sorrow, and pain after 25 years, please seek medical help.

  • BadKitty904

    OT: State Election Officials Fear Feds Are Making Security Worse
    Secretaries of state are concerned about not just the federal government’s request for voter information but also the information they’re not getting about election security breaches.
    http://www.governing.com/topics/politics/gov-elections-states-federalism-trump.html

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9b73af87dcea81afd4e593c1cc509bd5e87add8101e6aa71c911eafae9715e0c.jpg

  • Joe Beese

    Rand Paul is YES on MTP. Safe to assume Capito is as well.

    If we don’t get two out of Murkowski, Heller, Lee, Portman, and Moran, Trumpcare lives to terrorize us another day.

    • Spotts1701, Nothingburger Chef

      Paul indicated last week he would vote to debate, but I think he’s still a hard NO on anything other than straight repeal.

  • elviouslyqueer

    College student Trube testified that her 2014 visit to A Place For Women included a lengthy “counseling” session with four women who browbeat her with their own tales of guilt over past abortions.

    And here I thought that whole “Shame of Thrones” thing was purely fictional. Good lord.

    https://media.giphy.com/media/m6tmCnGCNvTby/giphy.gif

    • mancityRed6

      it would be a prime time reality show if they could do it.

    • Edith Prickly

      The forced pregnancy crowd would LOVE to do shame parades if they thought they could get away with it.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Handmaid’s Tale-style public hangings.

  • Treg Brown ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ
    • BadKitty904

      After they’re born, they’re on their own. Unless, of course, they inherited money.

      ~ The GOP

  • BadKitty904
  • DrBadFish

    “Calvary,” not “Cavalry.”

    • PubOption

      If they were cavalry, you could show your disapproval (with votes) to the horse(s) they rode in on.

      • therblig

        crucifying horses ain’t kosher

  • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

    Um, guys? “Calvary”?

    Pedant, pedant, pdeantpedantpedantpedantpedaaaaaaaadadadadadant…

    • Fivedollarfeminist

      Oh, goddammit! Forgive me – I am a heathen Joo. Will fix! Thanks.

      • Shanzgood

        You should have blamed autocorrect!

        • Ghenghis McCann

          “Mr President. About your tweets? We’ve decided to blame them all on autocorrect..Yes sir, even covfefe.”

          • Shanzgood

            Covfefe is probably in them all by now.

      • shivaskeeper

        I was going to point out that cavalry is supposed to swoop in at the last minute to save you, but figured it was autocrorrected to the wrong word.

    • eggs ackly-wright

      Neigh.

  • Komsumverweigerer Ron

    Hawaii is beautiful AND sensible?
    Now if it weren’t always so damned HOT…

    • Bananas Foster

      But it’s a wet heat.

      Oh, wait….

  • geoffalnutt

    Oh, for God’s sake! Let him do it himself. Lazy hippy!!

  • proudgrampa

    *sigh*

    I got nothin’.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    You know who else wants to put something in your vagina for Jesus?
    https://media.giphy.com/media/dBHihWw3HjzMs/giphy.gif

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

    I’d love for them to be slapped with a HIPAA violation fine. $50,000 per willful violation.

  • Anna Rompage

    Jesus fucking christ, Nurse Rebecca looks like one of the Stepford wives, that had a botched brain implant that went severely wrong…

    • Ghenghis McCann

      That explains why she thinks the teddy bear is a real human baby.

  • Joe Beese

    Politico’s Tara Palmeri reporting that The Mooch has delivered on the threat to shitcan “suspected leaker” Michael Short.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      It’s just struck me:
      Tony the Mooch isn’t ‘communications director,’ he’s Donnie’s ‘fixer.’ Short’s lucky he isn’t sleeping with the fishes at the bottom of the Potomac.

      • BeachBum

        Someone should send Col Possumtick III a dead fish wrapped in newspaper. He would be gone in 60 seconds.

  • The Librarian

    I’ll take Nurse Ratched over Nurse Rebecca any day. Fuck these fake clinics. Here’s my sign: I Don’t Regret My Abortion. I Wasn’t Ready.

    • WIDTAP

      Nurse Rebecca’s licensing board needs to review if she remains qualified in light of HIPAA violations.

      • The Librarian

        Absolutely.

  • Christopher Story
    • shivaskeeper

      Also too, that anyone might be having any fun somewhere.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I regret that Lord Dampnut’s mother didn’t have an abortion.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Grandmother.

      • canes_pugnaces

        Great great grandmother.

        • therblig

          Euglena #12

  • Aileen

    Using your contact and work information to chase down your family and employer to blackmail you into not getting an abortion sounds really empowering! Fuck these people. If they really gave a shit about reducing the number of abortions performed in their communities, they’d dedicate themselves to providing free contraception and education about how to avoid getting pregnant in the first place.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      ^^^^THIS!

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      They’d prefer abortions to remain legal, or at least available. Otherwise they don’t get to a) shame women and b) use them to gin up their base.

      • Red Bird

        Exactly. In all the years of Republican controlled government, very little has actually been done to make abortion illegal. They need a permanent boogie man.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          With Roe v Wade in place, they can only do so much. That said, several State Legislators have done or tried to do as much as they can to make abortion unavailable to poor women, teenagers, etc.

    • Christopher Story

      But that empowers the normalization of sex and sexuality.

    • MynameisBlarney

      That makes entirely too much sense.
      It’ll never work.

    • shivaskeeper

      Much easier to take a page from the collections agencies.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      I had a few RWNJ types (family, high school) unfriend me on Facebook for having the temerity to point out that restricting access to birth control would lead to more abortions. Bye Felicia.

      • Shanzgood

        I saw a Catholic article recently claiming that “new research from the U.K. proves birth control increases abortion rates” because over half the women were using birth control when they got pregnant. Amazing the lack of logic there.

        • alpacapunchbowl

          Oh, speaking as a graduate of a Catholic HS, I assure you, you have NO idea.

    • peregrin

      This is how I came to the realization that anti-abortion fanatics weren’t actually anti-abortion. Because if they actually wanted to reduce the number of abortions they would be handing out free birth control on every street corner. Funnily enough, they are against that as well as any kind of sex ed. It’s all about punishing women for having sex.

  • Christopher Story
  • TheGrandWazoo2

    Christian organization bearing false witness? Conceivable!

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      Heading towards ‘likely.’

  • shivaskeeper

    So they are fundamentally the same as our SovCit fake doctor yesterday. They are lying hypocrites who will act like one of the more disreputable collections agencies in perusing you, They are attempting to hide behind the 1st Amendment to violate the 1st Amendment. All they need is to have Sekulow’s ACLJ to be representing them in court and it well be the perfect storm of Christian derp.

  • canes_pugnaces

    What did the Romans know that we don’t?

  • therblig
  • Craig Kazin

    The Kenny G music alone would keep me out of that clinic.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Worse. It’s Donnie & Marie.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    There is no crime an x-tian won’t commit. They would rather pray for forgiveness than not do evil. They are the embodiment of the worst humanity has to offer.

    • therblig
    • shivaskeeper

      This particular version is sort of Neo-Calvanist. Once they have said the magic words they are the new elect. They don’t really need to ask forgiveness as their salvation is assured regardless. Much like the original Calvinists they can’t do unrighteous things anyway as the holy spirit pushes them towards righteousness so everything they do is righteous QED.

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        That right there! It floors me that people believe crap like that.

        • shivaskeeper

          It makes them be able to claim to be more moral, good, and pure than the rest of us without having to actually be more moral, good, or pure.

          I can see the attraction to it. They get all the benefits plus the supposed authority to lord it over us without having to actual do anything to earn it.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            I see the attraction as well. And it pretty much sums up the republican’ts stance on any topic.

    • BeachBum

      You never wanna ask for permission if you can ask for forgiveness.

    • Cubanz

      Absolute faith corrupts as absolutely as absolute power.

      – Eric Hoffer, philosopher and author (25 Jul 1902-1983)

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        I have never seen that quote. Thank you. I see some reading in my future.

  • rosenbomb

    I went to a Calvary Chapel once as a teen. The youth pastor spent his entire time talking about how much weed he used to smoke and all the LSD he did, and how one time he played Russian Roulette and shot his foot (???). Then he found Jesus and everything was cool?

    I didn’t understand why those stories were supposed to make me want to hang with Jesus, so I didn’t go back. I did eventually try weed and LSD though.

    • Shanzgood

      I hope you skipped the Russian Roulette.

    • shivaskeeper

      Well yeah. They have to show how worldly and depraved they were before Jesus. They have to show you they were hip and down with it back in the day.

      • BeachBum

        Then when you tell them you wanna be all worldly and depraved too, for about 30 years, but will be back for Jesus, they get all mad. Seems like a double standard to me. Jeeze Louezze !

        • shivaskeeper

          Double standards from them? Say it isn’t so.

          The adult pastors are worse about it. The youth pastors have to try to be “cool” to get the kids involved. The adult pastors try to walk a fine line when talking about their own sins and fail every time. They have to make the sins sinful but not so sinful you turn form them in disgust. So their sins are along the lines of “I watched a movie on Cinemax once” and other trivialities.

        • BreakingDeadMen

          Worked for Saint Augustine

      • grindstone

        I used to say, if everyone who ever stood up and gave their testimony about how they used to drink, sell drugs, and run prostitutes were telling the truth, the cost of drugs and women would be around $1 a throw, just out of excess supply.

        Using the evangelical to rational translator on the above testimony produces this: I drank a beer once, and threw up. I bought a joint once, and traded some of my mom’s valium in the parking lot, and I had a lustful thought.

        • shivaskeeper

          Essentially my point. They go over the smallest of sins so no one gets turned off by the real sins committed. The understanding in no one will call them on it just as they will not call anyone in the congregation on their real sins.

    • Rags

      A lot of these jerks get started because they have to do community service and find they are in a sweet gig. Finding Jezus is entirely optional. As is better future behavior.

    • Bitter Scribe

      But did you play Russian Roulette with your foot?

      • rosenbomb

        No! I only decided to try to cool things he mentioned

  • Randy Riddle

    Hasn’t anyone developed at app that maps out these fake women’s clinics to specifically steer women away from them?

  • shastakoala

    This place doesn’t happen to be located in a trailer does it?

    • therblig

      God’s Own Doublewide

  • therblig
    • Bebecca

      When I was a kid I thought he was old, now I think he’s yummy.

  • “Hey, ladies, did you know if you have sex, you could get pregnant? You did? Well, let me shove this up your hoo-hah anyway, so you can see the consequences of your sinful whoredom. It’s a little blessing from God! A baby! What do you mean it looks more like a shrimp? It’s totally a human baby because a song lyric from 2800 years ago says it is!”

  • William
    • Zyxomma

      Stolen, shamelessly.

      • @MrsRazor66

        Same.. shamelessly

  • Gayer Than Thou

    Wouldn’t it be easier to just wave some kind of medical equipment over a woman’s belly and then print out some picture from the internet of a random adorable baby?

    • Ghenghis McCann

      That’s sciency stuff. You need to hang a pendulum over her belly and interpret how it moves.

    • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

      You are missing the oh so important “you must be punished for having sex” part of the ritual.

    • mancityRed6

      I’m sure there’s some skeezy guy in a trailer out there doing that…well, one less now, but still.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      They pretty much do that with their absurd teeny baby “fetuses,” as though fetuses look like fully formed Gerber babies, only tiny, as opposed to a blob of non-sentient cells, which is what they are.

  • Alienist

    A serious note about medical ethics: It seems that the main ethical issue is patient autonomy. This requires that a patient have all the information that a reasonable person would want about the procedure being considered, the advantages of undergoing the procedure, the risks of performing the procedure, AND available alternatives to the procedure. Without all of these being provided, the patient is not exercising personal autonomy, and the professional is acting unethically and opening themselves up to a lawsuit.

    These “professionals” may believe that their religion exempts them from telling the whole truth and allows them to distort scientific findings, but it does not. This is not even a grey area.

  • Serai 1

    Rapists aren’t only men.

  • Khavrinen

    “Nurse Rebecca will get that ‘baby photo,’ even if she has to jam that probe up to your eyeballs! That’s dedication!”

    Dedication. That’s one word for it. Not the word I would use…

    • jenny_whyme

      Having had a trans-vaginal ultrasound to diagnose a (thankfully not) ectopic pregnancy.. I can tell you the picture of the “baby” is just a blob of cells. So, I’m not sure what Nurse Rebecca is expecting to prove here.

      • Penny Dreadful Says Cats

        At six weeks it’s a piece of rice with a tremor. (If you’re lucky – assuming you want to form babby.)

  • Daniel Hooper

    I’m not the hugest fan of abortion myself, but it’s A) Not my body.
    B) I’d want all the truthful medical advice if something did effect me, and
    C) As much as it wouldn’t be my first option, it definitely needs to be AN option.

    Seriously, where do these groups get off forcing their pro-life agenda down some scared woman’s throat? Do they really think God will look kindly on them if they burden someone with a child they can’t support and make both mother and child miserable?

  • Zyxomma

    My Senators (Gillibrand and Schumer) have heard from me, even though they’re staunch Democrats and on the right side of history.

  • Aileen

    Only slightly off topic, but as the recipient of a very early transvaginal ultrasound, I can confirm it is uncomfortable and somewhat invasive-feeling. And, early stage embryos look like blobs. They don’t look anything like babies. They are not endearing. If I did not desperately want to be pregnant, I would feel no attachment to the blob whatsoever. If someone tried to hand me a framed print of a 7 week ultrasound, I would assume it was bad abstract art. Even with a 10 week external ultrasound, the “baby” looks more like a gummy bear than a human. It made me hungry (and again, this was with me really being happy about being pregnant).

    • I wouldn’t put it past ‘Nurse Rebecca’ to photoshop it before framing.

  • Bitter Scribe

    Calvary Chapel of Pearl Harbor?

    Somehow the “Pearl Harbor” part seems appropriate. They specialize in sneak attacks, all right.

  • nightmoth

    That teddy bear is a slut.

  • BearDeLaOursistance

    Calvary Chapel are also the outfit that’s been taking the last available bits of FM radio spectrum all over the country and filling them with little 250-watt translator stations. No local community broadcasters for you, heathen! Have some satellite-repeated Jebus Pablum instead!

    It really is a complete domination operation with these people.

  • PixieThis

    I had a probe about 2 years ago to find out how large my fibroid was (I nicknamed it The Little Bastard) and it was awful and a little painful. Awful because we knew there was something terribly wrong with me and painful because you’re scared and tense and fearing the worst.

    These “pro life” idiots are so hot to put women through pain and humiliation and misinformation to further their own agenda.

  • whitroth

    I just love the phrase “anti-life”. Anyone know how much of the revenue of this “clinic” goes to provide pre-natal, birth, post-natal care? And how about daycare, and school taxes, and school lunches, and…..

  • Nodrama4mama

    This place ended up in my Facebook feed since practically every friend I have has had a baby in the past 12 months. I went and reported every single post to Facebook as either fake news or some sort of offensive and then I blocked them.

    Also, I get a trans vaginal every couple of years since ovarian and uterine cancer runs in my family, and let me tell you, they are uncomfortable. I just might have to picket their place.

  • handyhippie65

    pro lifers are for the death penalty. anti lifers are not. i think they have their labels backwards.

    • I shot this through my Bullshit Secret Decoder Ring and found that “pro-life” actually means “pro-birth”. After birth, ya’ll can go fuck yourselves. So…THUMBS UP for lethal injection!

      • Lambsendbeds

        They’re not even “pro birth”. They’re “pro fetus”, and that’s only until 25 weeks gestation, after abortion is no longer an option. Otherwise, they’d be for offering good prenatal care, labor and delivery services, post partum care and nutritional assistance for mother and baby. They should go fuck THEMSELVES.

    • SeeTrain65

      “If you’re pre-born, you’re fine. If you’re pre-school, you’re fucked.”

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w15OS2PdCKo

      • handyhippie65

        damn, i miss george. his take on dumpy would be awesome.

  • Bebecca

    So here is the discussion I recently had with my 18 year old nephew, it was really out of the blue.
    Are you in love?
    Yes.
    I looked him in the eyes for a few seconds
    Don’t worry, I won’t do anything stupid.
    If you do, call me, don’t call your dad.
    I will. I couldn’t call him.
    I know, our dad was just like him.

  • cats530

    The big swinging dick in the sky has given Calvinists dominion over all women’s bodies.

  • Jonny On Maui

    *sigh*

    Yeah, I did my research before moving here. As an atheist, the high level of religious affiliation went into the ‘minus’ column. On the other hand, the ratio of folk who actually practice what they preach to those who don’t is the highest I’ve ever experienced.

    YMMV…

  • Calvary Chapel of Pearl Harbor?

    Ok honey, now this ultrasound device does look like a Nakajima B5N, but just think of it as sending a torpedo of God’s love up your lady parts. Soon, this Long Lance will let us know if your baby will live or if you’re an icky sinner.

  • ahughes798

    Once upon a time I had to have the “probe” for an issue not related to a pregnancy. To this day, it remains one of the most humiliating medical experiences I have ever had. I felt violated. I would not wish it on any woman, unless absolutely necessary.

    • Tiffany de Houston

      I did as well. It was extraordinarily painful and humiliating. Fuck these assholes!

      • tex7

        Wow. I had one to assess osteoporosis and it was nothing. They must be a lot more invasive for other purposes. My sympathy.

        • @MrsRazor66

          There are techs who know the limit of a vagina and how far and hard they can push it. Then there are techs who just don’t fucking care. Which it seems to be more of the latter. I’ve had many fertility issues so I’ve had dozens of vaginal US. Not to mention I’m due any day with our 3rd baby so I’m very familiar with these tests. Luckily I had a good tech and as long as I tell them my left ovary is hidden behind my uterus, they don’t go looking for it in my chest cavity.

  • Granny Sprinkles

    Hey y’all! This week just happens to be Expose Fake Clinics Week! Follow the linky! Do it! https://exposefakeclinics.squarespace.com

  • Lambsendbeds

    THIS Nurse Rebecca wants THAT Nurse Rebecca to go fuck herself with that vaginal ultrasound probe. I’ve had one of those procedures. It felt like my lady parts were the transmission of an old VW Beetle stick shift, and I was being driven by a driver who had never driven a stick shift before and was trying to drag race a Ferrari.

    • mardam422

      Vrooom, Vroom!! It’s not so much the shifting as the double-clutching.

    • JCfromNC

      I don’t have ladyparts for a wand to be inserted into, but I’ve still had an ultrasonic wand inside me, as part of a biopsy. I can attest to your description as being entirely accurate, although at the time I likened it more to crowbar being vigorously wielded.

    • Roadstergal

      Best metaphor ever. I had three in order to keep tabs on an ovarian cyst. Ram it into third! Quick, into fourth! Now… oh shit, mechanical overrev, back to fourth hard!

      • @MrsRazor66

        Oh God tell me about it! I had to have a tech stop because it felt like she was trying to get pictures of my heart instead an ovary by pushing it up so hard. I was in fucking tears! If a tech doesn’t know what they’re doing, that shit hurts like all fucking hell!

  • mardam422

    If I don’t get an abortion, will you adopt my baby? No? Then GET….THE…FUCK…OUT…OF …MY… FACE!!!

    • Penny Dreadful Says Cats

      Not enough. My body is MY property and what happens to it is MY choice. Nobody else, but nobody, gets to decide. PS: It’s not a child. It’s a cluster of barely-recognizable cells that could fail at the slightest provocation. I know, I lost three wanted pregnancies. Fuck these people so fucking hard.

      • @MrsRazor66

        I like pissing off the anti-choice people by arguing that until the baby is viable outside the womb, it is no different than than a parasite. Oh boy does that piss them off.

        • Penny Dreadful Says Cats

          And best of all, it’s true!

  • Robyn Ryan

    Abortion is a civil right. Just like voting. CPC are just like fake polling stations.

  • Jo Mathie

    Fuck these assholes. I’m lucky that I live in a country where abortion isn’t nearly as big a deal as it is in America.My sixteen year old friend got pregnant when we were in school and I sat with her at the clinic. It was quick, safe and the staff were kind. She was asked once if she was sure of her decision and when she said she was, that was that. She’s never regretted having an abortion – she was nowhere near ready to have a baby, even if she put it up for adoption afterwards. This guilt tripping and false information is really damaging.

  • George

    I accidentally clicked on the video. The teddy bear made me want to vomit a little. I can sense the hate through the video. The only thing Christian about that woman might be a belief in stoning.

  • @MrsRazor66

    I accidentally went to a CPC when I was 16. It was a horrible experience. When I was 20, married, and expected I was pregnant I went to planned parenthood and did a pregnancy test there and the treatment was 100% better at PP than the CPC. I was actually called a whore at 16 because I thought I was pregnant and wanted birth control.

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