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somethin’ wrong with that boy

Remember how Donald Trump Jr.’s initial explanation for the secret meeting he, Paul Manafort and Jared Kushner had with Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya was that she wanted to talk to them about how it’s terrible that Americans can’t adopt bouncy Russian babies, because the Russian government got mad about a mean American law called the Magnitsky Act? Hahaha, SCRATCH THAT, for it is some bullshit.

Remember how Li’l Biscuit’s later explanation was that he was promised by an “acquaintance” that he would get some anti-Hillary dirt gossip? Monday night, the New York Times reported that the “acquaintance,” music publicist Rob Goldstone, who reps Russian pop star Emin and his Russian oligarch dad Aras Agalarov, specifically emailed Junior saying the anti-Hillary dirt was part of a Russian government effort to help Daddy Trump’s candidacy. This is the actual truth, but OMG there is so much more.

Junior just fucking TWEETED OUT HIS ENTIRE EMAIL CHAIN WITH GOLDSTONE. He said he was doing it “in order to be totally transparent,” but WE think he did it because the New York Times called and said, “Hey stinky, guess what we’re about to publish? LOLOLOLOL!”

This makes Junior look bad, especially since the subject line of the FIRST EMAIL from Goldstone is “Russia – Clinton – private and confidential.” It’s an email chain, so you’ll want to start at the bottom:

In case you cannot embiggen, here are the key points. In the FIRST EMAIL from Goldstone, he says:

The Crown prosecutor of Russia met with [Emin’s] father Aras this morning and in their meeting offered to provide the Trump campaign with some official documents and information that would incriminate Hillary and her dealings with Russia and would be very useful to your father.

This is obviously very high level and sensitive information but is part of Russia and its government’s support for Mr. Trump — helped on by Aras and Emin.

“THE CROWN PROSECUTOR OF RUSSIA.” While the actual title is “prosecutor general of Russia,” this is a very high Russian government position! It is like the Russian Loretta Lynch! (Fuck you Jeff Sessions, you’re not worthy of your title.)

“PART OF RUSSIA AND ITS GOVERNMENT’S SUPPORT FOR MR. TRUMP.” It’s right there! The foreign enemy nation is working to help your daddy in all kinds of ways, and this is one of them. You game for some collusion?

Junior responded 17 minutes later, saying, “I love it, especially later in the summer.” You know, when it could really do damage. Like maybe the end of July during the Democratic Convention or something? Oh we are just putting words in Junior’s mouth!

Most of the rest of the email chain is about scheduling, but there is another very interesting thing. Remember how we are supposed to believe, according to both Junior and the Russians, that Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya is not part of the Russian government? That’s funny, because in the email chain, Goldstone refers to Veselnitskaya as the “Russian government lawyer”:

Junior is like AYUP, can’t wait, that Russian government lawyer is gonna tell me some SHEEEEEEEEEIT about Hillary! Ima bring Paul Manafort and Jay-Jay Kushner, so we may share this collusion experience, sexually! Indeed, Junior forwarded this entire email chain to Manafort and Kushner, just to make sure they all could experience the joy of the Russian collusion circle jerk.

This is a far cry from Tuesday morning, when Trump Jr. was tweeting about how this meeting was “nonsense” and shows the “desperation” of the “Media & Dems.” It’s also hilarious, because Dead Breitbart’s Internet Home For Steve Bannon’s Leaking Skin Tags wrote this morning about “DURR DURR DURR NEW YORK TIMES HASN’T EVEN SEEN THE EMAILS DOY DOY DOY WE ARE THE SERIOUS JOURNALISTS AROUND HERE.” Good instincts, dickwits!

Senator Lindsey Graham was interviewed on MSNBC this morning, and he immediately used the excuse that Donald Trump Jr. and Jared Kushner are new to politics, so give ’em a break, you guys! MSNBC anchors Stephanie Ruhle and Ali Velshi were like “Um, OK, fine, but Paul Manafort has been in politics for 40 fucking years, so why don’t you politely insert that argument back inside your ass?”

Meanwhile, the Trump White House sent Hungarian Nazi Pajama Boy Sebastian Gorka out to run interference on this, and he told CNN’s Alisyn Camerota it’s NBD because Junior isn’t even a “member of the administration.” Haha OK, that may be true, but Jared Kushner certainly is! And all three were part of the Trump campaign, you know, the campaign Robert Mueller is investigation for colluding with Russia.

Anyway, we are sure this is all #FAKE NEWS, except for the part where Donald Trump Jr., the unfortunate thing that happened the first time one of Daddy Trump’s dog-paddling sperm miraculously found purchase inside a human lady’s egg, TWEETED THIS FROM HIS PERSONAL ACCOUNT. Perhaps Trump Senior needs to amend his public statements on the Russia matter to say, “NO COLLUSION. NO COLLUSION. MY FUGLY ASS SON IS THE COLLUSION.”

We are just saying.

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  • msanthropesmr

    I said in the other thread, when I get emails like this, they go directly to the SPAM folder.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Don Ho.
    /no offense to hoes.

    • msanthropesmr

      Tiny treason…

      • Skeptical_thinker

        Bubbling up?

  • Chris Hall

    Lock him up! (With votes)

  • TJ Barke

    Something’s fishy aboot this.

    • msanthropesmr

      Since when did you become Canadian?

      • TJ Barke

        Don’t be such a hoser.

        • msanthropesmr

          I think the correct response was 11/9/2017

          • Notreelyhelping

            Eh? Beauty.

          • TJ Barke

            Four months into the future?

          • msanthropesmr

            DOH!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Too good to be true? Junior’s trolling us? It’s a setup? DAMMIT MAN WHAT ARE YOU SAYING

      • TJ Barke

        Maybe AOT,K?

        • Lance Thrustwell

          Aaarrgh!!

        • Angry Red Bird DGAF

          I agree. Remember what happened with Maddow?

          • Celtic_Gnome

            If this is a setup, it is so brilliant it’s beyond any Trump’s ability. Well, maybe Barron and Tiffany. I don’t know.

            Goldstone sent the names of the people attending (Russian government lawyer lady) so Trump Tower security would have them. Where they would have to sign in. And, while Goldstone didn’t stay for the meeting after delivering said Russian government lawyer lady to the tower for said meeting, he did update his location on Facebook showing him at Trump Tower at the time of the meeting.

            Of course, if the whole thing is a set up just to scream fake news, doesn’t it still constitute obstruction of justice on junior’s part?

          • Angry Red Bird DGAF

            Call me cynical but the timing is strange. And remember how everyone thought the polls were right back in 2016? Someone knows which buttons to push to get us to react. That’s all.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      You can’t spell ‘hoofwanking bunglecunt’ without an ‘eh’.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Well, isn’t Junior swaggering around like the Royal Prosecutor Anastasia now!

  • Joe Beese

    “Crown prosecutor of Russia”? That makes it sound like Russia is still ruled by an autocrat. And we know that’s not so!

  • Wild Cat

    So you mean I have to sit through Oliver Stone’s “The Fresh Nigerian Prince of Mar-A-Logo” on an insipid blind date in 2021 in a seventyplex?

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      The opening score, “Parents Just Don’t Understand (That I’m Holding Treasonous Meetings at Trump Tower)” is sure to rule the Top 40!

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Oh, not the “They’re not experienced political operators! Cut them a break!” defense. And from a guy who ostensibly knows the law, what with being a Judge Advocate in the U.S. Air Force.
    Hey Senator – if some butterbar used the “I’m new at this!” as a defense during a court-martial, would you be so quick to cut a deal?

    • Swampay

      Funny, is ignorance of the law supposed to be a legal excuse? Something tells me it’s not.

    • OneYieldRegular

      Excitable boy, they all said. Well he’s just an excitable boy.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Send lawyers, guns, and money.
        The shit has hit the fan.

        /how was i to know she was with the Russians, too?

        • Opalescent Riddles

          How was I to know
          She was with the Russians, too?
          Dad get me out of this!

          • The Wanderer

            “Dreezle, dreezle, drazzle, drome;
            Time for this one to come home.”

    • Electric Ukulele Land

      Jared and Don Jr. can claim naiveté, for what good it does them. What’s Paul Manafort’s excuse?

  • Swampay

    This gun, I think it is smoking.

    • armed_bears

      In Yoda: Smoking, the gun is, i think.

    • TJ Barke

      At the very least it’s still a bit warm.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Happiness is a warm gun.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      This gun is rolling coal.

  • Joe Beese

    “Later in the summer” didn’t mean “when it will be more politically damaging”.

    He meant “After I’ve had a chance to spend some vacation time my wife and kids.”

  • OneYieldRegular

    You know who else was new to politics?

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    It’s all over the Dutch news naming it: “Taking one for the team.”

    • msanthropesmr

      “Team” hah! Tell me another one. There is no I in team. There is, however, me, me, me.

    • TJ Barke

      There’s no Donald in team.

    • Wild Cat

      OK, Class, Dutch 101:

      De zoon van president Trump heeft de mailwisseling online gezet die voorafging aan een omstreden ontmoeting met een Russische advocate. Daaruit blijkt dat Trump Jr. vorig jaar documentatie kreeg met belastende informatie over Hillary Clinton.

      • Skeptical_thinker

        mailwisseling

        You misspelled emailweaseling.

  • EvelyndeBarry

    I heard a story about a guy who met a teenage girl online and they were going to meet up (for sex). When the meeting took place, turns out it wasn’t a teenage girl but a dude who was a cop. There wasn’t any sex (BUMMER). But the cop is saying it’s still a crime. Huh?

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I know, right? It’s, like, thoughtcrime! Totally unfair!

      • EvelyndeBarry

        Yeah, I mean it wasn’t even a chick!

        • Msgr_MΩment

          He at least get a phone number?

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      The sex came later and was just as non consensual as the reason for conviction.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Uh, yeah, this (along with generalized amateurish bumblefuckery) is why so few of the people “caught” by Chris Hansen and Perverted Justice are ever convicted of anything.

      • EvelyndeBarry

        In terms of looks, Mueller is no Chris Hansen. I think his conviction rate is higher though.

    • Angry Red Bird DGAF

      Are you trying to compare Trump to a guy who solicits under aged girls on line?
      Or are you trying to defend Trump by saying he didn’t actually commit a crime?

      • EvelyndeBarry

        I’m saying Trump Jr., Manafort and Kushner don’t get to argue “but nothing bad happened at the meeting!” when what matters is their mens rea (state of mind) going into the meeting. . . Also, but not related to the foregoing, I don’t doubt that Trump has been with underage girls.

        • Angry Red Bird DGAF

          Oh. Good point.

  • canes_pugnaces

    Dear Ms. Lindsey:

    “I didn’t know murder (treason,etc.) was against the law,” is NOT a defense. Ever.

    • capnkrunch

      Unless you’re a cop or a politician.

  • Joe Beese

    Indeed, Junior forwarded this entire email chain to Manafort and Kushner, just to make sure they all could experience the joy of the Russian collusion circle jerk.

    Sure hope neither of them was the one who gave this to the Times.

    That would signal divisions within the administration!

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    But HER emails, right?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Always. Especially at the NYT.

  • MynameisBlarney

    The extremely cynical side of me is suspicious as fuck.
    This HAS to be some sort of con…right?

    • msanthropesmr

      That is one explanation. Occam’s Razor says DUMB AS SHIT.

      • armed_bears

        hope so.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Or…
        Derp Jr. takes the blame for all the rooshan election meddling shit and his corrupt as fuck dad pardons him and continues to blunder through his unpresidency.

        • msanthropesmr

          Possible too. But I think all of these assholes would throw each other under the nearest bus – given the opportunity.

        • NastyBossetti

          I kind of think that would lead to mass protests and possibly violence.

          • MynameisBlarney

            I doubt it, but I’d like to see the mass protests.

        • Angry Red Bird DGAF

          I wouldn’t be surprised if the pardons have already been written.

          • MynameisBlarney

            In crayon, of course.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          So, Donnie thinks Mueller gets one sacrificial lamb, and he just closes up shop and walks away?

          • MynameisBlarney

            I wouldn’t doubt that he does.

    • armed_bears

      Everybody in the media (excusing Breitbart and Hannity) sure have bitten hard on it…. but it is just SO WEIRD. How can they be this dumb? Or do they know what Mueller has and are running ahead of the poop tsunami?

      • WotsAllThisThen

        How could the President possibly have the means to find out what a special prosecutor has on him? In a DOJ run by a lying sycophant? It boggles the mind.

    • canes_pugnaces

      My first thought, then i remembered who we are dealing with: The Trump family

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Never attribute to cleverness what can be easily explained by incompetence.

        • TJ Barke

          I think it’s supposed to be malice not cleverness, but then, these fuckers are both malicious and incompetent

        • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

          Zero dimensional chess is being played here.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      If the NY fucking T gets conned by these guys – now, while their bullshit sensors should be set to maximum – I’m giving up. We deserve to lose.

    • anon_the_great

      In a world where perception Trumps reality it’s OK to believe the Dipshit Dauphine really is that stupid and criminal.

    • vivian

      He’s never had to face the consequences of any of his actions before, so in his mind, why would this be any different?

  • GunToting[Redacted]
    • WotsAllThisThen

      My favorite part of any new job is saying “It’s my first day” at every opportunity.

      • proudgrampa

        “It’s my first six months.”

  • anon_the_great

    LOCK THEM UP
    LOCK THEM UP
    MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN

    • OutOfOrbit

      No one will be charged until everything that [can] be known [is] known.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    It is like the Russian Loretta Lynch! (Fuck you Jeff Sessions, you’re not worthy of your title.)

    I dunno, when it comes to doing illegal dictator shit in service of the oligarchs, I think Sessions is a more apt comparison.

    I mean, we ain’t talkin’ about Atticus Finch here.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    What does it take to get mavericky mavericks like Walnuts and Miss Lindsey to get beyond being “disturbed.” Does Trump actually have to sell the White House at a loss?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I don’t think it can be done. They are the posterboys for party before country.

    • TJ Barke

      I think he has to be actively trying to murder them both, or refuse to sign off on tax cuts for the rich.

      • msanthropesmr

        The practical result of all this foofaraw is that tax cuts for the rich becomes more and more difficult, I hope. And therefore, the less useful Donnie is as a tool.

    • exinkwretch

      It’s gonna take a Spetznatz brigade goose-stepping up Pennsylvania Avenue. And even that might not do it, if they’re smart enough to wave a Confederate flag.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    “Your honor, my client requests that all charges be dismissed, because he did not mirandize himself.”

    • The Wanderer

      Their defense at trial will be affluenza. “I’m too rich to know right from wrong.”

      • Joe Beese

        Really, campaign finance laws? Do you know how many of those there are? It’s, like, a ridiculous number. No one can be expected to know all that stuff.

        Are we really going to start sending rich people to prison now? Over this?

        • The Wanderer

          My answer to “Are we really going to start sending rich people to prison now?” would violate the Rules.

        • Panika MCD

          the FCC makes a manual that is free on the internet every 2 years, but it’s not like Trump people should have to read it, right? not when they’d have to look up the relevant portions in the easy to navigate table of contents to see “Campaigns may not solicit or accept contributions from foreign nationals.” in kind contributions, how do they work?

        • Cranky Man

          Yes. The responsibility lies with the rich not to abuse the absurd amount of power they already have. If they can gain even more power they will, that’s just physics.

      • anon_the_great

        And ya know it’s true. The Rich are different

    • Opalescent Riddles

      Oh yeah? Then where was his OTHER hand?

    • ez

      Crazy?

      Crazy like a Door Knob

  • Michael R

    Why were we introduced to so many people who make our skin crawl ?
    Why ?

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    I’m not going to do any “toldjaso” happy dances until the DOJ starts demanding some of these shitheads turn over their passports.

    • OutOfOrbit

      10 – 4 on that.

  • exinkwretch

    Here’s the looming response from Congressional Republicans, condensed for clarity: “Sure, they committed treason and broke TONS of other laws, but that bitch Hillary didn’t get elected, amirite?”

  • Crystalclear12

    And “Nobody is this fucking stupid” wins by a nose.

    • vivian

      Fucking 45 lengths. Take that Secretariat.

  • memzilla Ω
    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Honestly, at this rate, I’d accept a power vacuum.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    Huh. Maybe Mike Flynn did have “a story to tell.”

  • Joe Beese
    • UncleTravelingMatt

      I had a similar thought during the campaign when TrumpCo kept blaming “accounting errors” for various misdeeds. My accountant very rarely makes mistakes that make it look like I am committing felonies.

      • jesterpunk

        That is only because you dont hire the bestest bigly smart accountants.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Or doctors, or lawyers, or vice-presidents, or . . .

          • jesterpunk

            You cant hire those edumicated elite people, you have to hire outsiders.

  • jesterpunk

    Its now super stupid watergate.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVFdsl29s_Q

    • SterWonk

      Since there wasn’t a new episode over the weekend, I ended up re-watching this one.

  • proudgrampa

    Paul Simon needs to update this song for the Trump era:

    “I been Norman Mailer’d, Maxwell Taylor’d”

    https://youtu.be/QOvs3rCFI2A

    • Wild Cat

      I’d advise our political enemies to listen to “Richard Cory.”

      • proudgrampa

        Ooooh. Good one.

  • lucidamente

    Say, you know what Hannity’s first question to Trump Jr. on tonight’s show will be?

    • jesterpunk

      How is this Hillary’s fault?

      • Crystalclear12

        How is this Obama’s fault?

      • TJ Barke

        Why did Hillary make you do it?

        • jesterpunk

          It was that Ben Ghazi guy again.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      “This isn’t a question. I’d just like to take this opportunity to indulge in a few minutes of vigorous stroking.”

    • exinkwretch

      Why didn’t Obama stop this when he had a chance? (Be sure and leave out the little detail about Mitch McConnell).

      • Angry Red Bird DGAF

        That song is already playing everywhere.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Boxers or briefs?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “Don, why did you back out of tonight’s appearance on my show?”

      • Msgr_MΩment

        “Mummmppff mmmfph mmf mpph mfff,” through lawyer-decreed duct tape CPAP mask.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      “Why is the media convinced that asking for information from a foreign government is somehow illegal?”

    • Wild Cat

      “Left stall or do we just want to go to Marie’s Crisis Center for a daquari?”

    • schmannity

      “Who thinks I give a better blowjob, you or your dad?”

    • Alan

      But what about Obama?

      • The Wanderer

        What about Naomi?
        WHAT ABOUT THE TORCHA!?

    • schmannity

      Donald Trump: Great President or The Greatest President?

  • Joe Beese
    • msanthropesmr

      And I would have gotten away with it too, if it hadn’t been for my meddling, kids.

    • The Wanderer

      There are some who say that The Stig has a tattoo of his face – on his face.

    • GoutMachine

      And they’re usually involved in crooked real estate deals. THE SHOE FITS, SHEEPLE!

      • vivian

        IT SCANS!!!!

    • NastyBossetti

      Gump Worsley libelz!

  • Joe Beese
    • msanthropesmr

      I loved him in the Stray Cats.

      • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

        Agreed, but those Gap commercials were a bridge too far, as it were.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      They wanted to control the spin. That’s it.

      • Lamashtar

        Normally, you have an EXPLANATION to make the spin. This looked more like an episode of Dumb Crook news. It offers no mitigation whatsoever. It *confirms* the NYT story.

    • Canis Greyhame

      So … he decided that he would incriminate himself before the NYT could get around to it? Nice panic move there.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Vox predicted this yesterday.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Remind me never to smack my kid in the face and then run for President. That shit will bite you in the ass.

  • Vincent Ricola

    Dumb. Fuckhead.

  • Joe Beese

    Guys guys remember when Hillary was asked to say something nice about Donald and she said “I respect his children. His children are incredibly able and devoted and I think that says a lot about Donald”???

    I have to seriously admire the way the writers have set up these callbacks.

    http://www.metafilter.com/167940/Its-day-162-with-POTUS45-marking-another-helluva-week-in-US-news#7090629

    • Canis Greyhame

      I’m pretty sure she was pulling a Jedi mind-trick of supreme irony when she said that. We won’t fully realize what a masterstroke of a backhanded complement it was for quite some time.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Saaaaay….yanno what ELSE happened on the day Dermpo Jr. met with the rooshan lawyer lady?

    http://video.gq.com/watch/the-closer-with-keith-olbermann-guess-what-else-happened-on-6-19-16?c=series

  • I’m trying hard to imagine the reaction of the Republican party if Chelsey Clinton met with an agent of a foreign government who allegedly had incriminating spy evidence on Donald Trump.

    It’s between howling, screeching pack of wild monkeys ready to tear off human faces and slavering rabid wolves ready to eat human livers.

    • Skeptical_thinker

      It’s between howling, screeching pack of wild monkeys ready to tear off
      human faces and slavering rabid wolves ready to eat human livers.

      Normal GOP behavior, then.

    • Joe Beese

      Imagine Chelsea Clinton had taken Bill Clinton and campaign chair John Podesta to a meeting set up by a Chinese government intermediary who claimed to have damaging information about Donald Trump’s tax returns and said over email they were willing to share the information in a bid to defeat Trump.

      Imagine this information came out mere weeks after stories revealing a major Democratic funder, acting on the behest of prospective National Security Adviser Susan Rice, had been trying to work with Chinese hackers to steal copies of Trump’s tax returns.

      Imagine, during all of this, that Hillary Clinton herself had gotten on a stage and begged the Chinese government to release Trump’s tax returns. “China, if you’re listening, I hope you’re able to find the tax returns,” Clinton said in Florida. “I think you will probably be rewarded mightily by our press.”

      Imagine that these stories were not isolated. They came alongside dozens of strange meetings between Clinton campaign aides and Chinese staffers — contacts left off security clearance forms and “forgotten” during sworn congressional testimony — and were buttressed by Clinton herself lurching toward a strangely pro-China policy and an unusual, and repeatedly articulated, affection for China’s leader.

      And imagine that in a crucial stretch of the campaign, hackers backed by the Chinese government really did break into the Trump family’s systems and release a bevy of damaging financial documents in a successful effort to elect Clinton.

      https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2017/7/11/15950664/trump-jr-russia-meeting-clinton

      • Villago Delenda Est

        I’m imagining the NYT going apeshit. Along with Faux Noise, Morning Joe, and Devin Nunes.

  • Thiazin Red

    Part of the issue with impeaching is getting a president Pence, but if he were removed I can see Trump flipping on him out of spite.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      He’s on record as laughing at the mere notion of Russian interference. He’s going down with the ship.

      • Thiazin Red

        Ugh, lets hold off for a year and take back the house, president ryan sounds just as bad.

        • Darlene Underdahl

          Ryan’s a smarter and worse person, but he can’t play to the rubes like Trump. A big part of Trump’s appeal is his sociopathic “I’m a total shitass and get away with it. Don’t you wish you were me?”

        • Persistent Tennessee Rain

          We don’t have a year. And Ryan will be a lame duck controlled by the democrats until we can win back the house and have Hillary Clinton as president like she should have been in the first place.

      • Bebecca

        Is he stupid or a liar? I actually said that to hubby and he said “both”.

  • lucidamente
    • TJ Barke

      Is he Bannon’s long lost brother or something?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      All the best people. Yooooge people.

  • vivian

    Waiting for DJT, Jr. to proclaim “I’ve got nothing to hide” approx. 72 hours before even more incriminating evidence surfaces.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Jaysus.

    Schindler: (responding to Ezra Klein)

    //twitter.com/20committee/status/884794195675840517

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
    • Joe Beese

      Pure journalistic dynamite!

    • TJ Barke

      Can we charge Lumpy as an accomplice or accessory or something?

      • Alan

        What about Wally?

    • jesterpunk

      Donny’s lawyer quits in 5.4.3..2….

    • Canis Greyhame

      Must schedule emergency “save me, Sean!” interview …

    • Electric Ukulele Land

      I thought Don Jr. had a lawyer… is he actually worse than his father about taking legal advice? “Here let me blab some more on national T.V. after dumping the most incriminating evidence possible.”

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Obviously the rumors of him hiring a law talking guy were fake news.

      • Alan

        They have really bad lawyers.

        • TJ Barke

          What good lawyer would want to rep for them?

          • Alan

            Maybe if they got paid.

  • Joe Beese
    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Riiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhttttt,

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Yet another tweet that has not aged well. That’s what, eleventy billion of them now?

  • OutOfOrbit

    The USA Democracy Bldg. is ablaze and the fire marshal (Mueller) says, “No hoses until every shred of evidence from every lead is traced down to ground.”

    • OutOfOrbit

      Fire-fighter: “Two more building are on fire, sir.:”
      Mueller: “Hire another investigator, stat.”

  • schmannity

    “THE CROWN PROSECUTOR OF RUSSIA.”

    Just one more undisclosed meeting and Sessions would have taken the title.

    • OutOfOrbit

      Didn’t know ruskies had a “crown prosecutor”.

      But then considering the IQs involves…

      • TJ Barke

        Yeah, that’s fishy.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        My theory is that the email was written by a Brit who used the term out of habit.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Reasonable theory.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Just in case the Czar is taken out of the cryogenic chamber….

      • The Wanderer

        Which is why I said on the last thread that this should be taken with a few grains of salt.

      • NastyBossetti

        They don’t, but Rob Goldstone is British, so he was using their term for a similar position.

        • insolenttomato

          I was wondering about that. I knew Russia was an oligarchic mafiocracy, but there was at least some pretense of Putin not being a monarch.

  • Anna Rompage

    Veselnitskaya isn’t technically a govt lawyer, rather it sounds like she is a lawyer that is well connected to higher ups in the Russian govt, and oligarch circles, and helps them launder their illegal money through banks in Cyprus, among other places…

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Well that makes it better.

      • C4TWOMAN

        I know I’m relieved!

      • Anna Rompage

        Seeing that a number of Trump clients seem to bank at Cyprus banks, not to mention his own advisors (Manafort & Page, and WIlbur Ross) connections to these same banks, makes me wonder what is about to unravel in their schemes…

        Personally I think it’s great Mueller is putting together a dream team of top corporate & foreign mob investigators…

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      In this case, I believe “government lawyer” is a euphemism for “intelligence asset who happens to be a lawyer.”

      • C4TWOMAN

        I was thinking mob lawyer, but it’s Russia–same dif.

    • Alan

      Among other places like Trump accounts?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      For example, Trump Organization properties?

    • proudgrampa

      There’s a difference?

  • Canis Greyhame

    As a last resort, I guess he can always shit his pants in the hallway and plead insanity. You know, the Ted Nugent defense.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    “Donald J. Trump, Jr. was not affiliated with the campaign and is not a member of this administration. I met him once — many years ago — but have not spoken with him since. I can’t help it if he is a fan and says nice things about me. That doesn’t mean I have a relationship with him, or even know the guy.”

    • C4TWOMAN

      “I barely know the guy.”

      -Donald Trump , Sr.

      • LucindathePook

        And then a cock crowed three times, or something.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        That might be one of the few true things that Trump has ever said.

    • jesterpunk
      • eka

        sacrificable minion. when jared takes the fall, you know we’re getting close to the king.

    • Thiazin Red

      Okay sure, but then he also invited the campaign manager who went to the meeting too.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Don’t go out in any rowboats, Donnie Jr.

    • chimichanga

      Which means he was a courier. To whom?

  • C4TWOMAN

    Hacked. His email account was hacked. Years ago. And he didn’t know those emails were even there until now when a concerned friend notified him OMG there are emails from your account about the Russian governt lawyer chick!

    And then he was hacked AGAIN on Twitter. Cuz he’d never have published those emails on twitter which he didn’t even know about until his friend told him to check his account and OMG this must be a vast left wing plot by Killary and Obama to set him up… FAKE NEWS!!1!!!1

    /Trump Jr. & Wingnutospere

  • Ilgattomorte

    In the spirit of complete disclosure Trump Jr. has also released all of his Internet passwords, his home address, telephone number and a dick pic that confirms a 3″ penis size.

    Smart guy.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “It’s just like my dad’s.”

      • schmannity

        Only bigger.

        • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

          That’s what she Reince said

      • TJ Barke

        Whaddya mean that’s not actually yooge?

  • Crystalclear12

    Fuck it. We’ll do it live?

  • Bill D. Burger

    rotfl…

    https://twitter.com/WHITEHOUSE_ORG/status/884589391045214212

    (*btw: To avoid any confusion, it’s a satire site…K?)

  • AppleJackie

    i really think these dummies are setting up a defense whereby hilz was so evil cause BENGHAZI!!! and EMAILS!!! that a little, light treason was worth it to stop her from winning.

    • eka

      what’s pathetic is that they spent so much energy trying to get something on her and all they got is emails and something about risotto.

  • armed_bears

    Off topic, but how the hell can collusion NOT be a federal crime?

    • MynameisBlarney

      I’d say that’s on topic.
      On topic as fuck.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Ah, but conspiracy is a crime.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    …about those liberal tears…

    • TJ Barke

      Right now they’re laughter sourced.

  • goonemeritus

    The turd never falls far from the asshole.

  • Anna Rompage

    How long before DeadBart drops the story that this is all Hillery’s fault? Or have they done that already?

    • msanthropesmr

      Oh, they haven’t already? I’m not going there to check.

    • The Wanderer

      Probably. I ignore that site.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Seriously this is the last line in their story: The email does not refer to any cooperation, coordination or collusion between the Trump campaign and the Russian government.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        The fox news story ended on a similar note, pointing out the emails do not indicate Donnie was aware of a larger Russian conspiracy.

    • BMW

      They will never not blame Hillary for this.

      • puredog

        That’s not so. Sometimes they will omit blaming Hillary in favor of blaming the blah.

    • elviouslyqueer

      #ButHerEmailsALSOTOO

  • Bill D. Burger

    LMAO….Oh the irony and the stupid are strong lil’ Donny Muck: “Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, …..”

    https://twitter.com/DonaldJTrumpJr/status/788915146341031936

    • The Wanderer

      Clinton hasn’t said a gods-damned thing about this, at least not publicly. Privately, I bet she’s laughing herself silly.

      • Thiazin Red

        I would be pretty fucking pissed off.

        • Wontium

          I feel like Hillary probably cares enough for any personal offense to be overshadowed by concern for her country

          • SisterArtemis

            I imagine personally it’s a thorn in her side, but her concern for our nation and our political culture is the bigger issue. Her entire political life has been about the good of the citizens, whether as her neighbors or her constituency.

          • Wontium

            If it would mean the next day we had a healthy democracy again, she’d go on TV and accept responsibility for everything, I think. Polar opposite of Trump.

          • SisterArtemis

            I think that is true. The whole story about changing which surname she used had EVERYTHING to do with subsuming her personal preferences to helping Bill get the job done at the public level.

          • Wontium

            See also; apologizing for losing the election. :/

          • SisterArtemis

            Yeah, that one bothered me. I think she did it sincerely, which bothered me more. Why should she apologize for winning the majority of the popular vote, but losing because of a bunch of fuckwadery she had no ability to prevent? But it was heartfelt, and I know she felt she let us down.

      • Canis Greyhame

        Old Trump family tweets have a tendency to come back to haunt them.

      • armed_bears

        laughing herself silly.… thru the tears.

      • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

        In between the rage-sobs and the bourbon.

  • BMW

    I know a lot of people said that Donald Jr. is the Fredo of the family, but I think they’re *all* Fredo. The Trumps are entire family of Fredos.

    • janecita

      I read that as “Frodo,” and I was like, “they aren’t Frodo, they are Gollum!”

      • SisterArtemis

        They aren’t even Gollum. They’re some high-rank Orc captains or the minions who serve the Nazgul.

        • puredog

          “No, my FATHER was named Fred. Oh.”

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      I know I’ve said it before, but they aren’t even Fredos. Fredo had pathos and motivation and was sweet to Michael Jr., and was pathetic and in pain. The Trumps are CARLO. Carlo, Connie’s husband, who betrayed Sonny to Barzini, then cowered and cried in front of Michael, then believed him when he said he was going to Vegas, then got into a car with Clemenza in the back seat. Although Donald Sr. might be the guy in the courtroom scene who laughed coarsely and said “Yeah, Senatah, there were a lotta buffahs.”

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      All the upfists on the internet for this!

      • Kathleenrshaffer

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        !ps114d:
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    • chimichanga

      No way Libtard – BENGHAZI… (Poe attempt)

  • vivian

    Does this mean we have a President who is willing and able to throw his own son under the bus just to stay President for a few extra months?

    • Randy Riddle

      Or weeks.

    • The Wanderer

      If pushed to it, I think that Trump’s capable of throwing Ivanka under the bus.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      This is the man who punched his son in the face in front of his whole dorm, knocking him to the floor. So, yes.

  • susan_g

    Tweeting the emails was advised by Junior’s legal team after being told that they would be paid “later”.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      This is brilliant.

    • SadDemInTex

      Not only is this funny, I bet it’s true

  • Bill D. Burger
    • elviouslyqueer

      Motherfuckers, there is NO SUCH THING, in any Civics book anywhere, as “POTUS Jr.”

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        psst it’s a parody site.

        • elviouslyqueer

          LOL, I know. But I wouldn’t put it past Orangina and his spawn to refer to Lord Fugly of Fugly-on-the-Roundabout as “POTUS Jr.” AT ALL.

      • bookish

        I thought Ivanka was POTUS Jr.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        I have it on the good authority of the Marshal of the Supreme Court.

        • WotsAllThisThen

          It’s Marshal Law!

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
    • TJ Barke

      Oy vey…

    • Canis Greyhame

      As in, “Ha ha, our guy is gonna get away with TREASON! Take that, libtards!”

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Yup and that’s the biggest problem. Some 60 million voters that would rather hack off their left hand with a rusty axe than to admit they might have been wrong.

        • Canis Greyhame

          And getting back at those snooty coastal elites is their primary motivating force.

          • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

            You know those snooty coastal elites, the ones that invented the iPhones they’re tweeting their assholery out on, as well as the source code for the internet they’re using. FUCK THEM!

    • BigCSouthside

      Yeah, you stupid twit. That’s why we will unseat him first

    • Phoenixdoglover

      “Can a President be impeached if his son, son-in-law, and former campaign manager are guilty of treason? Asking for a friend!” – deleted Trump tweets

    • WotsAllThisThen

      In this administration the whole family is President!

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    You’ll not be overly surprised that the latest wingnut dodge is that this is perfectly OK because Hillary did the exact same thing. I mean, sure, there’s no evidence, but she must have seeing as she’s just that evil.

    • msanthropesmr

      Hillary Colluded with the Russians?

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        So they say, so they say.

        • msanthropesmr

          This changes everything@!!!

      • Anna Rompage

        Yes, the State Department, along with 9 other independent govt agencies, allowed a Canadian Company with Russian investors to buy some uranium mines in the US.

        The fright wing says this would allowed Russians to mine uranium here, and then send it home, or to other places, like that evil, nasty Iran.

        The problem with this of course, is that the mining of uranium is highly regulated, and the Canadian company does not have an export license, meaning that all of the uranium they mined, would have had to have been sold to the US…

        • Canis Greyhame

          It’s exactly the same thing as espionage! Somehow. I guess. Who knows? SQUIRREL! BENGHAAAAZI!

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Also, too, DoE has the final say on it, and chances are Hillary didn’t know about it until after it was a done deal.

      • Cliff Hendroval

        How was I to know she was with the Russians too?

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Yep, and then you ask them when and where…

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        Well, obviously they don’t know, because Deep State is covering the whole thing up. And it’s Obama’s fault too.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Aaah, Hillary. Fucking Owning that fine line between “engaging in laughably stupid criminal conduct” and “orchestrating the most complex, airtight worldwide conspiracy in history.”

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      In fact, this whole thing is actually Hillary covering up that she did this, and also James Comey, who deliberately lost her the election, as part of the cover… I can’t, it’s too hard trying to be inside a wingnut brain.

    • cmd resistor

      Jr.’s twitter feed has crap about Hillary getting shit from Ukraine

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    “The newspaper is going to publish a story that says I stabbed someone!”
    “Quick, take the knife to the cops. That oughta prove your innocence.”

    • Bill D. Burger

      “Make sure not to wipe off the fingerprints.”

    • jesterpunk

      Bring the body with you and leave the knife in it.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Don’t bother with the cops. Tweet a picture of the knife, blood and all, and let your fanboys say you didn’t actually kill anyone, so it’s all good!

  • armed_bears

    Who could have released these emails to the NYT? Well, I would point out that this has totally sucked the air out of Vegan Buttholegate. WHOA IF TRUE.

    • amb310

      I’ll be in my bunk.

      • OutOfOrbit

        Wutcha gonna do there?

    • SisterArtemis

      I don’t know… yesterday the story popped up in my faceborg feed from Jezebel; today it was George Takei (btw, great feed, if you’re a fb person) linking to a distractify dot com article. I have a hunch this story will be floating around for quite a while.

  • WE DEMAND SINGLE RUSSIAN FEMALE LAWYER.

    • msanthropesmr

      Calista Flockhart was in that, right?

  • andyshelt

    The only gun that could be smokier than Trump Jr’s email is this one! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/437e4b56e07cc3b5386d44c7723e8dd87968bf9815ecec9c35ffc216cbab2eea.jpg

  • La forza del resistino

    Somewhere, Tiffany is laughing her ass off.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      Although this may adversely impact her inheritance, so maybe it’s more of a nervous giggle?

      • vivian

        Inheritance? The Will would probably state that “other children of issue get nothing” which will actually be a relief, since those named will be on the hook for mountains of debt

      • La forza del resistino

        While Ivanka and the boys are nervous that he doesn’t repeal the estate before long, thinking Donald’s will stops at the letter I. Sorry Melon.

      • shastakoala

        I think at this point Tiff is just happy she inherited more of the maternal gene pool.

      • OutOfOrbit

        The only thing to inherit from that OPOS is DEBT DEBT DEBT!

      • eka

        she’s probably already had her memoir ghostwritten, is just waiting for the timing to be right. being the hated daughter will sell more when he’s in jail, right?

  • jesterpunk
  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Whoa, ees true.

  • I agree with Lindsey ‘Lil Bit’ Graham.

    If my dog pees on an electric fence I chalk it up to him being new at being a dog.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    I was going to ask, when does Trumputin throw the kid under the bus? But then he went and threw himself.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      I just realized that perhaps his father forced him to tweet that all out.

    • eka

      “now i’m your favorite, right?”

      • OrdinaryJoe

        But try as she might, poor Tiffany will never get a yes to that question.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      “What if your hands are too small to properly grip someone in order to throw them under a bus? …Asking for a friend.”

  • Run2Live
  • janecita

    What is it with the Trump family and their lack of chins?

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Chins are like jaw lines, spines and balls. You need to be a man to have them.

    • SisterArtemis

      You know, we are all born with the face we have, can’t really fault that. But rich kids usually have the opportunity to “correct” weird facial stuff. You’d think Daddy would have wanted them to look more Manly or something. And Eric’s teeth – again, if you don’t have the money, you chew with the chompers you have. But if you’re rich? why wouldn’t the parents fix that mess?

      Also too, Eric looks like Gary Bussey’s sad little love child. Just sayin…

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I agree with the we live with the face gawd gave us but the thoughts and attitudes we fill ourselves with eventually show on the exterior and those boys have pompous, self-important prick written all over them.

        PS: Exceptions are made for resting bitch face, we do not judge people for that! (Please!)

      • Suttree

        Isn’t there some saying about the face that you have at 30 is the face that you deserve.This saying probably doesn’t include Ivanka’s plastic. That will probably last a century or so.

      • janecita

        Just like Ivanka did. Her chin is bought.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Ah! Finally a reasonable explanation for all the endless campaign rhetoric against China!

      Jealousy!

  • CountryClubJihadi

    In Russia, The Dumb Fucks YOU.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      They had to be ROFL over this. It’s like the Nigerian Prince scheme, it’s just so transparently dumb.

      • WeaselPoo

        I didn,t actually have the millions i promisrf random people, so….Not guilty.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    I can’t wait for Paul Ryan to tell us that it’s because “he’s new at governing and doesn’t know any better – if we would all just give him a chance.”

  • WeaselPoo

    I fail to see whst any of this has to do with Hillary’s 5 million illegal Mexican voters refusing to build and pay for the border wall that will bring back calming jobs that the Chinese global warming hoaxers want so they can currency manipulate the Obama Deep State into increasing job killing Sharia healthcare, even though Trump won and the failing fake news media didn’t.,which is why we should never forget the Bowling Green Massacre that happened in Sweden because Crooked Hillary’s emails killed Vince Foster’s beloved cat “Covfefe”.

    • SisterArtemis

      Wow. Never knew that part about the cat…

      • Lamashtar

        I want an entire movie about this, and at the end, just like Rosebud, we find out the cat’s name was Covfefe.

        • SisterArtemis

          This seems like a perfectly reasonable request

    • OutOfOrbit

      Talk about a twisted plot!

    • Suttree

      I believe that you could get paid at Brietbart for this.

    • elviouslyqueer

      And a partridge in a pear tree to you too, sir or madam.

    • Johnnymoreno

      I can’t argue with that.

    • Doug Langley

      Well, that’s easy for you to say.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      “Your logic is unimpeachable!”

      “We don’t use that word around here anymore.”

      “Oh, right. Your logic is unassailable!”

      “I SAID WE DON’T USE THAT WORD ANYMORE!”

      • chimichanga

        Unassholeable?

    • starfanglednut

      Needz moar random caps and punctuation errors. Some ellipses made of commas would be a particularly nice touch.

    • SadDemInTex

      I ❤️ you 🐀💩

    • fawkedifiknow

      You forgot to mention how Obama did 9/11.

    • ResistanceFictionista blondeiq

      Can I get a side of canned clams with that?

  • dslindc
    • UncleTravelingMatt

      That’s his “disturbed” look.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        That’s also his “A run in 2020 might be viable” look. Whaddya think John?”

    • Banrion

      Whispering….Ur doin it wrong.

  • Run2Live

    Diaper Donnie’s probable defense,
    “Yes, Your Honor, I broke into the house, but there wasn’t anything worth stealing, so I’m the one who was robbed.”

    • tomamitai

      Colbert stole that line from you?

      • Run2Live

        Guilty as charged. Steal smart I say.

  • Courser_Resistance

    Can anyone tell me if that “Ignorance of the law” thing has EVER worked for them?

    Yeah, didn’t think so…

    • Suttree

      Bankers pulled that shit before and got a fine.

    • Jennifer R

      If you are rich and can prove a lack of intent then you are let free. Really, the lack of intent is a thing everyone, by the letter of the law, can use. Just it doesn’t matter if you are poor.

      • WIDTAP

        It’s the

        “Too rich to have shame.
        Too dumb to have game.”

        defense.

        • AnnieGetYerFun

          “If Trump’s a twit
          You must acquit.”

      • MizzMazz

        Just like the star quarterback rapist. “Jail will ruin his life!”

        • eka

          was that the one who was too upset to enjoy his steak?

          • MizzMazz

            Frankly, I’ve lost count.

          • NastyBossetti

            No, he was a swimmer, not a quarterback.

          • eka

            so hard to keep these entitled assholes straight …

          • NastyBossetti

            There are just so damn MANY of them.

  • janecita

    Why can’t we just have early elections? At this point is painfully obvious that the Russian candidate, became our president.

    • Anna Rompage

      Unfortunately there is not a mechanism in the constitution to do that…

      At best, we’re going to end up with Pres Pence, or Pres Ryan…

      • WIDTAP

        True, but it is a depressing use of the word “best”.

      • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

        Like they didn’t know.

      • eka

        but it still matters that we impeach. we need the system to work. if congress won’t impeach this one, then we might as well just scrap the constitution and start over. maybe create some checks and balances that actually work?

  • Suttree

    With any luck Turnip Jr. will turn states evidence to avoid going to jail. Or just because his father don’t luv him no more.

    • WIDTAP

      There ain’t no way that Don Jr. lets the family fortune go to his weaselly-faced little brother.

      • Phoenixdoglover

        What if there is no fortune if the Russian “understanding” falls through?

  • BreakingDeadMen

    His passport should be suspended.

  • amindofitsown

    This won’t be a thing, because

    A. Hitlery done it too, so that totally excuses it

    B. This won’t be seen as being spectacularly stupid, but nobly transparent worthy of a knighthood

    C. Herr Gropenfuhrer is going to save us from the ill-eagles and the rampant Shania law, so him no his family can done do no wrong, praise Jeebus

    • BreakingDeadMen

      That’s the prolefeed, but there are still lots of non poles in government.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      I’m not going to spend much time any more thinking about the opinions if the willfully stupid. They can think whatever they want.
      This administration has become like an abusive relationship.

      • eka

        the problem is having to interact with them in ordinary life wondering how they could do what they did and what they think of it now. I have a few coworkers …

        • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

          I have a few relatives…. we just don’t talk politics. It wouldn’t end well.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      Although I take some hope from the fact that the fucktards respond to this information by saying it’s “Fake News,” apparently. Because that actually implies, somewhere in the wretched coils of their semi-functional brains, that they recognize it’s wrong if true.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    Remember when an embarrassing relative meant Billy Carter or Roger Clinton?

    • Blanche Beecham

      Oh those were the days. Billy was something else.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        When it was revealed he didn’t even drink Billy Beer at home, it was quite the scandal.

        • Lamashtar

          If a man doesn’t even drink the beer he claims he drinks, how can you trust him?

    • Beautiful Soup

      Plus didn’t Ron Jr do ballet or something?

      • BreakingDeadMen

        The daughter did Playboy and wrote something smutty. I like Ron, jr. a lot, so that means he is probably an embarrassment to them.

        • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

          He used to have a show on LA talk radio along with Stephanie Miller. It was pretty good.

      • Jared Andrew Shoemaker Jr

        yes he did

    • Doug Langley

      I’m having a hard time imagining anyone naming a beer after Junior.

      • BreakingDeadMen

        I Can’t Believe It’s Not Urine
        Really, I think it’s urine

  • Phoenixdoglover

    Sean Hannity will explain this. Please stand by.

  • marxalot

    The NYT had better publish what they have, too, so we can do side-by-sides, bc I will be very surprised if Donnie Jr’s tweeted out screencaps are 100% unaltered.

  • Blanche Beecham

    Was everyone in that family dropped on their head?

  • Nasty Candy Apple

    Daddy Trump’s dog-paddling sperm miraculously found purchase inside a human lady’s egg

    barfs

    • therblig

      ivana probably stood on her head while the least dead of the bunch took advantage of gravity.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    and we can all go home now because the internet has been won for today.

    https://twitter.com/aedwardslevy/status/884802596229312512

  • NastyBossetti
    • BreakingDeadMen

      hahahahahaha

      • NastyBossetti

        This poor guy is having a small breakdown right now. Like, he can’t even fucking believe it, even more than the rest of us.

        • chimichanga

          They’ll throw him under the bus and then pardon him. The GOP will clutch pearls and do nothing.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea
    • Marceline

      I’m pretty sure this guy is on the floor of his office in a fetal position while “Madam Butterfly” plays on repeat.

    • armed_bears

      Is there an annual “Nearly Pulitzer” award?

  • armed_bears

    So, firing Comey sure looks a lot more like obstruction now, da?

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Suddenly, the departure of Chaffitz to “spend time with his family” makes sense. Oh, I’m not saying he’s guilty of anything. But he may very well be the first one to say, “Fuck this shit. Ain’t nobody got time for this.”

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      That job of his was going to go from a sweet gig perpetually harassing Hillary and inflaming the paste eaters to a no win situation where he was perceived as a traitor to the base, or a lackey burying the crimes of the Trump family. A total dickweasal but no fool, he.

      • AnnieGetYerFun

        It was cute that he tried to just make it look like a money-grab.

  • LEST WE FORGET…

    A HEARTY HANDCLASP and a big THANK YOU to Mr. Goldstone for all he did to make all this possible!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f556RXvLVZw

    “Everybody give a cheer
    Santa Claus is sittin’ here
    Mr. Goldstone
    We love you!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c418eda5c07c51ca4fdb4e7116fd9836cc626525650e9ca7c036746f0697d947.jpg

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Please tell me he’s dressed like that because it’s a 70’s theme party.

  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    For fun I looked at a Washington Times article about this and it said how the FBI has been investigating Russian collusion for a year and had found zero evidence.

    Haha, just cuz ol’ Bobby Mueller keeps his mouth shut doesn’t mean he hasn’t found anything.

    • NastyBossetti

      You mean it isn’t protocol for any investigative body to run to the press each time they find a piece of evidence and tell everyone??

      • Jared Andrew Shoemaker Jr

        or sweat all over everything

  • OddMan

    And in the middle of all this, a new threat from Mutha Russia.
    I love how the BBC thinks that trump might have read Catch-22.

    Russia’s Lavrov threatens US over seized diplomatic mansions
    “If Donald Trump has ever read Joseph Heller’s famous satirical novel, he’ll recognise the situation as Catch-22.
    If President Trump hands back the Russian diplomatic compounds seized by President Obama last year, he will cement his image of Kremlin stooge in the eyes of his opponents. At this point any concessions to Russia would be highly controversial, in light of current investigations in America into alleged links between Mr Trump’s team and Moscow.
    But if the Russian compounds are not returned, Moscow may well expel a number of US diplomats and seize some US diplomatic buildings. That could complicate what Mr Trump says he wants to achieve: better relations with Russia.”

    http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-40567687

    • Jennifer R

      “If Donald Trump has ever read” I see a flaw with their premise.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        I don’t even think we could provide him the gist in 140 characters or less.

        • BosGrl

          Junior can’t even cough up a comma.

        • starfanglednut

          It is literally true that the Cliff Notes are to long for him, never mind the actual book.

      • armed_bears

        Suggests information not in evidence.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      As if Trump cares about better relations with Russia out of some political motivation.

    • Apple Scruff

      BBC forgot to mention how the Kremlin will unleash the pee pee tapes.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    I mean, just because the guy’s son, a Senior Advisor, and the campaign manager were in the room doesn’t mean it’s really relevant to getting our tax cuts passed getting on with the business of America.
    https://twitter.com/Brasilmagic/status/884823716827410432

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Yo, Orrin, did you miss the part where Prince Jared, Secretary of Every Fucking Thing was there, also too?!

    • ariel_gee_398

      Reached for comment, Paul Ryan said, “Are we still gonna slash Medicaid? Of course we are.” Then he tried to hide his erection while shrugging.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    This just in from GQ: Donald Trump Jr. Is an Idiot of Towering Proportions

    http://www.gq.com/story/donald-trump-jr-russia-meeting-flub/amp

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      I clicked on the link to see if you were paraphrasing.

      LOL, no!

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        I think Keith Olberman is rubbing off on them.

    • eka

      all a trump reads is “towering proportions” and interprets it as a compliment.

      • BackDoorMan

        … as another, much smarter-than-I Wonketteer observed: “an edifice complex”.

  • Rachel Book Harlot

    It’s a testament to how complicit GOP pols are that these dumbfucks are still around and able to do such damage.

  • Beautiful Soup

    Can someone make a picture of Junior with a witch hat? And put a funny joke about witch hunts on it? Forgive me, I’m new at this meme-making thing.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      You have all the right instincts!

    • Cliff Hendroval

      I can’t do the picture, but the caption should be something like “Looks like we found one!”

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance
    • Blanche Beecham

      Jr Mints don’t lie.

      • therblig

        they’re very refreshing.

        • Jared Andrew Shoemaker Jr

          damnit you beat me to it!

  • in the name of the moon

    I present to everyone an ad hominem attack: Gorka’s beard looks like a merkin.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      I hate that prick

      • SadDemInTex

        I second that emotion

    • Karen Marie

      He was supposed to have resigned. What the ever loving fuck is he still doing in the WH?

      • armed_bears

        Worse, he was sought out for comment by MSNBC… like we don;t have enough sludge in our heads right now.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    I love seeing their excuses get more desperate with each revelation.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Treehopper1104

    Do we get to start chanting “Lock him up” now?

  • SayItWithWookies

    I guess Florida rubbed off on Don Jr – if he were a few tax brackets poorer, he’d be the guy flashing was of cash on Instagram in front of the bank he’d just robbed. And I for one would like to thank him for making the investigation go just a little faster.

  • exinkwretch

    Recent history buffs: Did Uday and Qusay roll over on Papa Saddam before the Marines clipped them? Just wondering.

  • Lurkylu

    Trump boys makin” with the freak-freak……

  • Ricky Gay

    What the actual fuck?!

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Did anyone else yell, “Un-Fucking-Believable!” when hearing the Republicans like Graham and Hatch defending this?

    • Msgr_MΩment

      At least he didn’t grab the lawyer lady by the kitty cat, amirite?

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Miss Lindsey has manners. He would never grab anyone by the anything without an introduction.

    • armed_bears

      Imma gonna let you finish… but Graham has been a little more nuanced and judge advocate-y about it… He’s all in on “looks really bad”, but also “we’re gonna hafta see.” It’s not heroic, but it’s fair at the moment.

      • armed_bears

        But Orin Hatch is a tool.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      If we over react to this news, then we might not be able to kick everyone off of Medicaid this year. So, you can see the importance of keeping treasonous fucks in power just for the next few months.

    • puredog

      My response was not that dainty.

  • TundraGrifter

    It’s almost like they want to fail.

  • AngryNotSoOldHippy .

    The New York Times contacted the Russian right wing Republican traitors and informed them that they had the emails, and the NYT asked these shitting Russian traitors if they had any comment about the emails.

    So Trump Junior was well aware that the emails were going public. His lawyers ordered him to get ahead of it” by posting redacted and fragments of the emails while proclaiming, “See?! We didn’t commit treason!” despite the fact that these shit hole traitors undeniably committed treason by working with our nation’s enemies on behalf of our nation’s enemies.

    There is additional delicious chocolate marble caek in that supposedly — according to these far right wing Republican assholes — our country is “at war” with “terra” which makes their treason against our country even worse, supposedly.

    It always seems as though Christanic Republicans are traitors, every one of them, it’s only a matter of degree. Christanic rightards are defending the Trump regime;s treason against our country, and doing so because the right wing hate everything our country stands for.

    • eka

      well there is a degree of hypocrisy in supposedly promoting individual freedom while wanting to control who people fuck and what they do with their bodies. it’s really become a culture war more than ideological conflict. also on the left – i’m not sure people know what they’re fighting for. I’m not talking about anarchists, that’s a different category. But if you want government managed health care and university, you have to believe in government and that it’s generally a good thing, even if never perfect. you can’t want more government and yet think compromise is evil.

    • insolenttomato

      I guess that’s what fanatical devotion to the Kingdom of Heaven as imagined by Rick “muscular Jesus” Santorum does to you. Your primary loyalty ends up being to a supposedly divinely inspired authoritarian father figure, so long as his skin has the right melanin content. Actual lowercase “R” republicanism? Not so much.

    • puredog

      We have always been at war with Terra.

  • Joe Beese

    There is a Trump Tower in Azerbaijan, a country with which we have no extradition treaty.

    Just sayin’.

    • armed_bears

      I will remember I heard it here first.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I can only hope that it’s got fifty floors, no windows, and a long spiral staircase.

    • eka

      I’m just hoping something comes out that Spain or Belgium can try them on. Not sure we can trust the US to get rid of this administration. Of course, I think it has to be something like crimes against humanity to qualify.

  • Jared Andrew Shoemaker Jr

    we need Godfather Part II memes here right away cause DJ is going the way of Fredo

    • BreakingDeadMen
      • Joe Beese

        How big a spike in views do you suppose that video has gotten in the last 48 hours?

        • BreakingDeadMen

          Indeed. It was posted on a comment on my Facebook yesterday, thats how I could get it so fast.

      • Jared Andrew Shoemaker Jr

        no no no. The wake scene where Michael hugs Fredo and just glares at Neri

    • exinkwretch

      Jump in the boat! The fish are biting!

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      Donald Sr. really should have just let the kid take care of some Mickey Mouse nightclub somewhere.

  • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

    How long before Dipshit Jr. tweets out that they wanted to get the info so they could turn it over to the Clinton campaign to show someone was colluding with Russia against her?

  • BUT HIS EMAILS….

  • Everrett Fanuelli
  • Jackie Jones

    Something’s weird. This is so idiotic it feels like chum. Is this meant to divert us from something REALLY huge?

    • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

      Yes! Think about that.

      • Jackie Jones

        I would be really excited about next shoe dropping, yet I am so embarrassed and ashamed for our country. So my buzz is harshed. Sadly.

        • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

          I learned something from every bad acid trip I took back in the 70s and 80s,so cheer up.

          • Jackie Jones

            Didn’t know acid was still around in the 80s. I thought we were all coke heads. You’re right, of course. This is kind of fun.

  • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

    These guys don’t law too good, do they?

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    My favorite comment ever from TPM:

    mcbain:

    Trump Jr. is Ralph Wiggum with a Gordon Gekko haircut

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Trump Jr. is a Gecko with a Ralph Wiggum haircut

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Except Gecko knew what he was doing.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      RALPH LIBELZ

    • Rags

      Ralph coined the maga slogan……

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      The only ones not laughing are the children. Go figure.

      • Darlene Underdahl

        Better humans?

        • NastyBossetti

          Empathy hasn’t been totally extracted from them yet. Give it a few years.

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          Not poisoned at least.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Barron is perpetually emo. That’s what happens when you name a kid after an imaginary person.

      • eka

        isn’t that gesture the one used to point out someone’s bullshit?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I feel sorry for the kid, but at least he’s not being raised by his parents. Of course, he is being raised by the people who raised his mom…

    • BackDoorMan

      … and I get a really creepy Handmaid’s Tale vibe from that poor child in the red outfit… it’s like she’s thinking “I know where this is going…”

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I think that’s one of Ivanka’s. I don’t hold out too much hope for her.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    I am so close to winning Trump Apologist Bingo. The only squares I need are either “This is Very Common in the NYC Real Estate Business” or “It’s Sarah Huckabee Sanders’ Daughter’s Birthday.”

  • Joe Beese
  • William
  • Ninja0980

    Arrogance can make you stupid, and Trump Jr. is the best example of that we’ve had in a long time.

  • Joe Beese
    • Joe Beese

      “They said they would help! But they didn’t have shit!”

  • MynameisBlarney
  • merty

    What if Trumpy decides that Junior is too stupid to run his business and finally divests, as he was supposed to do a long time ago?! HAHAHAHAA I know! It’s not going to happen… Voluntarily! Some people are still working on it though. https://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2017/06/donald-trump-conflicts-of-interests/508382/

  • Komsumverweigerer Ron

    We are gonna need all KINDS of new words for ‘stupid.’

    • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

      How about “Trumpid”?

      • armed_bears

        I like.

  • Lyly Sirivong
  • Joe Beese
    • BMW

      That is some Kellyanne Conway caliber bullshit Cruznis spewing.

      • eka

        trump likes his groveling best when it comes with a bit of obama-bashing. but I fear cruz, like christie, will never win approval.

        • puredog

          For me, it is an article of bedrock faith to which I cling.

    • greyXstar

      Someone’s jealous the Most Odious Sleaze in the Room™ crown got taken by a noob.

  • BMW
    • Beowoof14

      Ah the Ted Nugent school of dealing with problems.

  • CO

    Don’t worry Greenwald is out there doing damage control for the Trumps lol. Wtf is wrong with him?

    https://twitter.com/ggreenwald/status/884783000428441600

    • Joe Beese

      Well, we know the text now!

      • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

        Which changes nothing!

        Well, ok, but only a little bit.
        Of everything that Greenwald textually wanked out.

    • Doug Langley

      “We should not rush to judgment”

      Yes, it should be treated just as carefully and nuanced as the Benghazi incident.

      • eka

        you think any trump has the stamina for that kind of interrogation?

        • Doug Langley

          Would love to watch and find out.

        • BackDoorMan

          … only if you invoke their name in every sentence. And they had better be really, really short sentences. With lots of fawning adjectives.

      • Darrell Imaginarian

        I always go to a Russian asset when I need advice about Russian skullduggery

        • Doug Langley

          But what if they elbow you aside for your weak-kneed response?

    • puredog

      Russians go in, Russians go out, who can explain it?

  • Joe Beese
    • eka

      they probably do feel in a bit of a rush, so little time, so many people to hurt.

  • Joe Beese
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      So is John McCain. The shit is about to not hit the fan.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      But he doesn’t have the vapors yet, does he?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Let me know when he’s troubled.

      • BackDoorMan

        … I’m holding out for perplexed.

    • mailman27

      And then McCain will grumble some nonsense, then help himself to a nice slice of tax cut, which Trump will then sign.

  • Marceline

    Remember folks, whatever we’re seeing now…

    Mueller’s got way more.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Precisely. People forget that Woodward didn’t really know anything about Watergate that the FBI didn’t tell him.

    • armed_bears

      That’s what she said.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “I may have to fire Jared and Don Jr for secret meetings with Russia. HA HA. Just kidding. I will fire Mueller instead.” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • William

    From the good people over at facebook page Christian Conservatives for Trump. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dc83ba24124c850f611cdb1c19a247fd27b665ec0443a046bdc6a7669780535d.jpg

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      You can’t argue with that logic.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      The home schooling is strong in this one.

    • Doug Langley

      I certainly don’t want interference in are elections.

      • puredog

        Interfearance is even scarier.

    • Shanzgood

      Is this a joke?

      • greyXstar

        Yes. These angels are trolling the trolls, and verily it is good.

        • Shanzgood

          Oh, whew!

        • William

          So convenient. Rather than traipse all over the internet to troll Trumpanzees, this place is where right wing Trump supporters willingly go to get trolled. It’s like Branson Missouri for idiots.

          • MrTusks

            “It’s like Branson Missouri.” Edited for redundancy.

          • greyXstar

            So…Branson Missouri then.

      • William
        • amrak63

          I’m glad you told me it was fake. I was preparing to make a joke about homeschooling and/or “Christian” seg academies.

        • amrak63

          I skimmed that FB page a bit. My favorite post was:

          “Also don’t use dildos! God said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine!”

  • Joe Beese

    “This is sum of all fears stuff. It’s what we’ve all been dreading,” said one White House official who is now exploring the possibility of retaining an attorney, a step described as purely precautionary. …

    The Daily Beast contacted multiple senior White House staffers on Tuesday to solicit defenses of Trump Jr., even anonymously. Each individual immediately referred questions to Junior’s legal and public-relations team, emphasizing that the president’s son is not a federal employee.

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/trump-aides-freaking-out-over-don-jrs-russia-email-the-sum-of-all-fears

  • Stein Olsen

    I can just imagine the Trump lovers;
    – FAKE NEWS.
    – But it’s from Trump Jr. His own twitter.
    – FAKE NEWS.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      They’re actually going with, “Hillary did it worse!”

      • sgt. jmk of the résistance

        Of course they are… and that’s why the uranium bullshit is all over social media again.

        • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

          ‘Xactly.

  • jaspersdad

    “I did it, so what are you going to do about it.”

    The entitlement is strong in this one.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      You know that they’re all going to get away with it, too.

      • jaspersdad

        I wouldn’t be surprised.

  • akryan

    This is fucking insane. Mueller officially has the easiest job in the world. He doesn’t even need subpoenas to get this information. Daddy and Jr. must be the two worst clients on earth for a lawyer to have.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      Especially since they don’t even pay their bills.

      • BackDoorMan

        … sorry, RFA, didn’t see your non-comment before I let my fingers loose. It amazes me that anyone would do business with this family of grifters… I mean, even after all the stories about stiffed contractors and tradespeople and service persons in every Trump property, some people STILL signed on to the Washington Old Post Office project. And yeah, guess what… there are lawsuits pending on that little debacle as well.

    • BackDoorMan

      … well, yeah. They don’t listen, and they don’t pay. Any lawyer worth his/her retainer would consider that a deal-breaker, but there are always those who have yet to learn. These would be the ones that graduated at the bottom of their class, not unlike Donnie Trump himself.

  • Me not sure

    Given that a little more than a third of all Americans seem to be diehard Trumpists, finding an unbiased jury in any future case might be very tricky. I believe that even under threat of perjury that they will lie during voir dire to get on the jury.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Considering as Republicans are in charge practically everywhere.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      Federal Case – Federal Court – Jurisdiction. JuneYoor has a residence in NYC – There’s your venue. They hate the Trump’s in NYC. Man, I had to really dust off the cobwebs for that, but I’m pretty sure it’s accurate.

  • Everrett Fanuelli
  • Gigglesnort

    “very high level and sensitive information” – they didn’t actually say “illegally obtained,” but I guess they didn’t have to.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      Dubya’s ethics guy spelled it out – if they had such material, the only way they could have gotten it was by spying…spying on a former United States Senator and Secretary of State.

      And Lil Biscuit was fine with that.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    I’m sure his newly retained lawyer is in a bar somewhere, pounding down shots.

  • greyXstar

    At what point do we just start assuming every elected official defending this is an accessory?

    • eka

      can we go after the ones too busy scrambling to kill people to even respond? Otherwise I’m stuck with toomey until 2022

      • Persistent Tennessee Rain

        Ditto, also, too. Toomey needs to go.

        • NastyBossetti

          We’re stuck with him for SO LONG!

      • lynchie

        we are stuck with Toomey until the Dems actually run a candidate

        • eka

          but katie mcginty had all those siblings and working class family … yeah, that’s all I remember from the commercials. honestly, I think a Tom Wolf type is the way to win in PA – people will not go for a big city dem, you need that rural appeal. The unions seem to indicate where pennsylvania will go. They were pro-Obama, pro-Trump. I don’t doubt that sexism plays a role. Wolf had the unions even though his business wasn’t unionized – it was known for treating workers well. He keeps quiet on more controversial issues – like fracking, which isn’t great, but it seems to be the best we can get in PA.

          • lynchie

            We had a great candidate running against her in the primary Joe Sestak who won as a congressman even against a hand picked candidate (by DWS). He was a veteran and a progressive. The DNC put up McGinty and shit on sestak. She was a Hillary clone, big wall street and banks relationships, no interest in working people. She worked for Bill Clinton and was part of the Clinton machinery. I went and heard her speak and it was like listening to HRC. She did not connect with the working people of western Pa.
            I tried to get involved with the election when Bernie was butt fucked. I asked for lawn signs, McGinty’s office said they had none, brochures they had none and was told to refer people to HRC’s web site. I asked for something printed with the web site on it and was told to print it on post it notes and hand those out. HRC had no presence in Western Pa. McGinty was a joke.
            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katie_McGinty

          • eka

            I’m not into the Clinton bashing because I feel a lot of it is manufactured and that may well be the case with McGinty as well … but pennsylvania is certainly difficult as you need to appeal to the ‘tucky part of pennsyltucky, while not losing philadelphia and pittsburgh. Also, I don’t think the DNC is the source of all evil, I just think it’s ineffective and unfocused.

          • lynchie

            You need to read up on Joe Stestak who was a congressman and would have beaten Toomey. If you don’t think the DNC decides who gets to run and who doesn;t and who was connected to Clinton you need some better glasses

          • lynchie

            read this about Sestak. The DNC and clinton machine were against a proven winner

            http://www.politico.com/story/2016/04/sestak-pa-primary-221644

      • greyXstar

        Can he take Little Marco with him please?

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      6 months ago?

  • Joe Beese
    • WotsAllThisThen

      Probably the truest thing he ever tweeted.

    • Bobathonic

      That he’s impenetrable to the irony is just…sad.

    • BackDoorMan

      … I gotta figure DTJr. added to himself… “yeah, but if you’re rich it doesn’t matter how stupid you are, the tough life is for the little people”.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • CeeQ

    Guess who’s getting cut out of the Trump will as we speak!

    Somewhere Eric is sacrificing a lamb to the Lord of Light for taking out his older brother and bringing him one step closer to the Iron Throne of Derp.

    Little does he know that Ivanka and Jared set up Junior for the fall, and has handed Eric over to their allies – the Boltons of New Jersey – who has promised their allegiance in exchange for rule of the North….East…!

    Meanwhile – Reince & Kellyanne hatch a last ditch effort to save House Trump from itself by trying to buy dragons on the black market.

    Stay tuned for the next episode of Game of Thrones – Fuckwit Edition!!!

    • puredog

      Read: for some people, 7/16 cannot come soon enough.

      • CeeQ

        A girl yearns for Westeros.

  • Seamus Romney
  • Joe Beese

    Question for Hucks-A-Fun at the next presser:

    “Donald Trump Jr. eagerly accepted a meeting with someone identified as a Russian government agent working to insure Donald Trump’s presidency, invited Donald Trump’s son-in-law and soon-to-be campaign manager to accompany him to the meeting, but Donald Trump was unaware of this. Is that the story you want to stick with?”

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    We now have our answer as to whether there is a bridge too far for the Republican party, and that answer is, “nope.”

  • rocktonsam

    the” private and confidential ” part threw me and the fbi off…

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    Either Time Travel Obama gave his Time Masheen keys to Hillary, and she went back in time to plant this email information so that when she lost, she could really give the Trump Administration such a black eye, by using a fake story about fake collusion with foreigners during a fake meeting that actually happened… or all the changing excuses being bullshat out by Trumpkins are actually just lies, and not one of them rooted in the truth.

    I know! Such improbable choices!

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    I think what the REAL NEWS is here is that Hillary clearly had illegal dealings with Russia because Russia said so. Why won’t the FAKE NEWS MEDIA report on that, huh?

    • Tio_Doidinho

      That was Sebastian Gorka’s mantra for 15 very uncomfortable minutes on the telly.

  • Joe Beese
    • Bobathonic

      Hey, that’s half my Senatorial representation!

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        Me, too! And Uncle Timmy said today that we (Mueller) could be looking at treason, having blown right past mere collusion.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Not just Trump officials.

      Remember how McConnell “gambled” on how the next Supreme Court Justice would be chosen by the next President.

      • greyXstar

        So much this! I don’t know why that dot isn’t being connected when it’s plainly obvious.

        Also too, think about how many times Donnie did something that made most everyone say “other campaigns have ended over less than this” and the entire party just looked the other way. Why nuke your entire party in defense of someone who’s never been in government? Because they knew what was going on behind the scenes.

        • Komsumverweigerer Ron

          And counting on getting a few things done before it all blew up.

          Oopsie!

        • Yup and how reid shouted himself blue in the face in the fall about the intel he’d just received? And about how Mitch wasn’t doing anything? And Mitch didn’t do anything?

          McConnell is part of this and should be in jail with the rest of em.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    can’t help but notice, Gladstones first communiques say refer to “official records” – which sounds like Russian official records – so, we’ve got that going for us.

  • Professor Fate

    Wow – about the only thing left to reveal is a tape of the meeting. And who knows when one deals with the Russians that your conversation is being taped is a distinct possibility.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Show us the “wire tapps!”

    • Joe Beese

      Fredo should be uploading that to Soundcloud before the day is out.

    • Bobathonic

      It was also in Trump Tower, and Trumplethinskin is reputed to have it wired for sound.

      • BackDoorMan

        … not to mention the meeting took place one floor below the BLOTUS, so I’m sure all Daddy Dearest had to do was put his ear to the vent.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    GOP Congressional oversight committees are now scrambling to assemble a robust and thorough “no comment.”

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Where are the interns!? We need all hands on deck! Get those squirrels in those t-shirt cannons ASAP!

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      They are busy expressing concern, while exhorting people not to overreact or jump to conclusions and to be patient and let the investigations that they are in charge of play out. Meanwhile, the congressional pages have been sent out to buy every broom in DC in order to sweep this under the rug.

      • puredog

        I like to interpret that as “Even better stuff coming, folks!”

  • Me not sure

    (Bullhorn)
    “This is Jefferson Beauregard Sessions, the Attorney General of the United States of America. Donald J. Trump Jr., we know you are in there. Come out of Trump Tower with your hands up or I will have the FBI knock down the doors so that I can come in and give you the stern talking to that you deserve. Don’t make me bring a hickory switch.”

  • BigCSouthside

    Right wing twitter predictably commending Jr for releasing emails and condemning Hillary Clinton for the mythical bullshit 33k emails. This whole thing is fueled by hate of one woman

    • yyyaz

      Don’t forget the blind hatred of the 63 million of us who voted for her.

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        Which is becoming even more blatant now that we’ve amply demonstrated that we were RIGHT.

  • Kurt Weil

    Well, I guess the vegan baby butthole has yodeled.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Fredo’s vegan baby butthole

      • amrak63

        Even President Naked Vegan Cafe Baby would be an improvement over President Trump.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Maybe to get more literal, I think it’s “The carnivorous manbaby butthole is hollering Kill The Wabbit all the way to 11 while shooting itself in the foot.”

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        “the vegan baby butthole has yodeled” is actually the high sign from the Russian spy that the dead drop of Podesta’s risotto recipe is complete

      • amrak63

        Wait, how could Elmer shoot himself in the foot when he only had a spear and magic helmet in that toon?

        (Yes, I watched too much Saturday morning TV as a kid.) ;)

    • CripesAmighty

      Yer killing me XD.

    • Shucky Ducky

      “Ask not for whom the vegan baby butthole yodels…”

  • natoslug

    Just imagine if Trump hadn’t surrounded himself with “the best people.” What a shit-show.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      It’s easier to think of him being surrounded by better people than it is to imagine that there are people who are even dumber than these morans.

  • Elvis Causticfellow
  • IndigoSnap

    Oh man. I DIE because “dog paddling sperm.”

  • President in Exile Firefly

    Dear God, these people can’t even collude right.

  • William

    ‘Bout time for Hucka-boo-boo to logically explain away this entire silly incident. My guess is Soros built a robot that looked like Donald Jr, and it met with some Russians in a fake and inflatable Trump tower. Fake news. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c7f548eb265a6c00f7d80578facce3110717eddd2079613997deaa674e09d110.jpg

    • Boscoe

      I guarantee you they’ll soon arrive at “the Russians are just lying to try and undermine Trump because they are so afraid of him and his giant monster hands.”

  • Mormos

    so when do they all get round up and put in custody?

    • William

      You know as well as I do that they will get away with it because of. um..something, something, Hillary, Benghazi something.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        No, we don’t know that. Where’s your optimism, man?!

        • William

          Because the mouth breathers enjoy a majority in both houses. Their base is pretty much a gaggle of gap toothed idiots. Just watch…any day now it will be “Lets talk about Hillary, remember when we talked about Hillary? That was great wasn’t it? And coal mines, lets talk about coal mines….and..and the wall. It will be so big and wonderful”

          • amrak63

            Before we forget here:

            Not all idiots are gap-toothed. The majority of Trump Chumps make above the national median income, and live in the suburbs or exurbs rather than Chicken Squat, Alabama.

          • Komsumverweigerer Ron

            They’re SPIRITUALLY gap-toothed idiots from Chicken Squat, Alabama.

          • amrak63

            Yes; if neo-Confederate attitudes were confined to the former Confederate states, they would be significantly less of a problem for our country and the world.

            It goes back a ways. George Wallace won the 1972 Democratic primary in the [snark]kudzu-strangled[/snark] state of Wisconsin. The late, great Hunter S. Thompson observed at the time that this proved there were just as many mean, stupid bigots in the North as in the South.

          • AuntyMaude

            That’s true. I work with two Trump Chumps. Neither is gap-toothed. One of them does need braces though.

      • starfanglednut

        Might take a few years, but I can’t imagine Mueller and his team will let the whole thing slide. Besides, as long as Trump remains mired in scandal and keeps his thumbs on the tweeter buttons, the repubs will have trouble enacting their evil agenda.

        • William

          When a man running for president comes on the TV and brags about being a sex offender to a giggling idiot and STILL gets elected, anything is possible.

      • puredog

        If Trumpie gets taken down because of a Hilary-related email, I may just OD on schadenfreude.

      • Kooolest G

        http://gph.is/2sDYdGz

        that was supposed to be a gif of SNL’s lester holt saying nothing matters

        • AuntyMaude

          I know of what you speak.

    • BackDoorMan

      … not… soon… enough. Yesterday might be too late.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    His dad will pardon him. He will move to Archangel.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Haha, not if Daddy is no longer Prez when the sentence comes down.

      • armed_bears

        Yeah… about that:

        In 1866, the Supreme Court ruled in Ex parte Garland that the pardon power “extends to every offence known to the law, and may be exercised at any time after its commission, either before legal proceedings are taken, or during their pendency, or after conviction and judgment.”
        http://caselaw.findlaw.com/us-supreme-court/71/333.html

        • BackDoorMan

          … yeah, okay, thanks… my mellow? Completely harshed. I mean, I’ve long suspected that the Presidential Pardon was going to be abused in all sorts of ways, but part of me held on to the sliver of hope that this would be a bridge too far for Americans to cross. I really, really want to believe he won’t get away with this… but… given the shit he’s gotten away with to date, I’m losing faith.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    ROFL Fuck you, Rafael, the knuckle dragging bigots in Texas ≠ the American people. Just because those window lickers are too stupid and too hateful to care about Russia running amok in our election system and in the WH, doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t care

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/cruz-dodges-questions-trump-russia-policies

  • Mavenmaven

    The Russians are White, so what’s the problem?

    • amrak63

      You’re joking, but the Stupid White Folks of Real Murka will give the Trump gang a pass for exactly that reason.

  • Poly_Ester

    As our Supreme Ruler will soon Tweet, “Not me, Not me, Junior!”

  • puredog

    NPR commentator just made the point that when Goldstone alluded to the “support for your father” by Russia and its government, DJTJ did *not* get all “What? What are you talking about? What support? This is the first I have heard of such a thing, believe me.”

  • DodgeDixie&Descartes

    With plans for a new Gulag Trump and a nifty 36 hole golf course snow free four months of the year, in Vladivostok, Little Don might maybe be taking the company jetski to Siberian to spend three or four years overseeing construction and dodging pesky subpoenas and warrants…

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    …drain the swamp, they said…no more corrupt career politicians, they said….give him a chance, they said….run the country like a business, they said. Ya know what? Fuck “they” in the ear. “They” can sit down and shut the fuck up.

  • FZsdaughter

    If it can be proven Trump took the election illegally (which of course, it could if anyone would fucking pursue this), then the whole lot of them should be chucked out and prosecuted, and the rightful winner installed as President. But I know this is 2017 and that’s a thing from back when the U.S. was still a democracy of some kind.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      I’m honestly afraid that that would start a civil war.

      • BigCSouthside

        Nah. Might get a little rowdy, but the US military would stomp that out pretty quick

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I agree. We have to let this play out. Even if we end up Prez Ryan. (ee-fucking-gads, I’d take clueless Pence over that shit-grinning weasel).

    • amrak63

      The Founders thought impeachment was enough defense. They never imagined the elected officials of our country would put party above country.

      The Founders were usually smart cookies, but this was an exception.

      • Kooolest G

        when the founders thought that up, the vice president was the person who got the 2nd highest number of votes for president, they changed that with the 12th amendment

      • Harbinger08

        It also never occurred to them that a small majority in the Senate would simply refuse to act to confirm a sitting president’s Supreme Court nomination. So they never put in a provision compelling the Senate to do so. They actually never thought that Senators would be such treacherous, ungentlemanly assholes.

    • AuntyMaude

      First of all, are you Moon Unit? And second of all, I concur with your assessment.

  • Rags

    The instant 4-5 jr read the first of these messages and didn’t notify the IC, he became a traitor to our nation.

  • clap hands

    oh no baby what is you doing

  • Lyly Sirivong

    European pop music is really rubbish sometimes.
    https://youtu.be/iuZUNjFsgS8

    Emin Agalarov’s music video (featuring You-know-who).

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Emin?
      Introducing Eminem Lite! “Half the M’s of the regular Eminem!”

    • sonaliraq

      I was gonna say this is the kind of crap music we’ll be subjected to when the Russians totally take over but actually we already are. I manage to avoid it most of the time by staying out of Forever 21.

  • Boscoe

    “How could I be guilty of collusion when I don’t know what that word even means?”

    • BadKitty904

      Sorry, Donnie, Ignorantia Juris Non Excusat, ya dumb bastid.

      • BackDoorMan

        … well, I know that applies to me (a lowly plebeian), but I’m pretty sure that such absolutes do not apply to the monied class(less).

        • BadKitty904

          As long as the Republicans – and their corporate and Russian owners – control Congress, there will certainly be no justice done in this matter.

  • Relativicus

    Does the NYT really call Junior “stinky”? I hope so.

    • AuntyMaude

      I think it’s formally punk ass bitch.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        That’s his Wu Tang name.

  • BadKitty904

    That boy’s about as sharp as a bowling-ball.

    ~ Foghorn Leghorn

  • insolenttomato

    “Have a subpoena, Mr. Goldstone . . .”

  • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

    The National Review is saying “There is now evidence Evidence that Senior Trump Officials Attempted to Collude With Russia”.

    NOW there is. Up till now, nothing.

    Read more at: http://www.nationalreview.com/article/449376/donald-trump-jr-e-mails-proof-trump-campaign-attempted-collusion-russia

    • Iron Monkey

      Last line of that article: “The Russian investigation isn’t a witch hunt anymore, if it ever was. It’s a national necessity.”

      The National Fucking Review!

  • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba
  • whitroth

    Jr. doesn’t seem to realize that he has just tossed his 5th Amendment rights, or that this *literally* IS THE DEFINITION OF “COLLUSION” (and treason), and his *intent*, and the *intent* of Jared and Manafort was to commit collusion and treason (cf: sting operations get you jail time, too).

    This right here is go to court time on charges. Wonder what any of the three will try to plea bargain? Oh… and I want to see any emails from the three’s email accounts at that time addressed to Da Rump.

    Or, in the Immortal Words of Megaphone Mark Slackmeyer, of Doonesbury, “Guilt! Guilty! GUILTY!”

  • Zippy W Pinhead
  • Jenny

    You guys are acting like this is a serious crime like being a black man, being black!!

  • IHaveThoughts

    You know, if you filmed it and set it to Yakety Sax, this would be like Dr. Strangelove as written by the Three Stooges.

  • FukuiSanYesOta

    OMG schadengasm!

  • Iron Monkey

    Crown prosecutor of Russia

    Didn’t something happen back in 100 years ago that go rid of all that crown stuff in Russia?
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7c73f1fcbcd3eb8b16f6ef3feaf0374d1258850421fdcea02671382e8ec96524.jpg

    • armed_bears

      Seems like it is a linguistic vestige of Goldstone’s British heritage, but it sure feels weird. But, yeah, 1917 kinda sorted out the monarchical issues.

    • whitroth

      That’s the UK version. I think he’s got the correct title in the story.

  • azeyote

    what’s it to you – i’m a trump – so fuck off ya fuckin peons –

  • rick

    Trump supporters are in a deep, deep (state) of denial.

    • whitroth

      I think the Nile is up to their chins about now….

  • Machnethylsteinerbincolabird
    • Jamespuck

      Yada,Yada,Yada.

  • SCK

    Jeez, what a stupid fuck.

  • bookish
  • BobZ

    Is anyone else worried this is just a setup? It really does seem just too much stupid, and laid out like a bait trail to a bear trap. The trap springs with the announcement “We faked all this ourselves to show America how gullible the Fake-News media is”, then we get to spend about 3 weeks discussing how to apportion blame, all the while Trumpcare gets no attention and gets past the senate…

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      No.

    • AuntyMaude

      I am, but I’m a pessimist by nature and a cock-eyed optimist almost never. Too much shit has happened for me not to be leery.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      The problem, from my standpoint, is that this is The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight. They have no message discipline, the leaks are torrential, and they careen from crisis to crisis. At this point, I don’t think they could plan how to take a dump.

    • BigCSouthside

      I thought that. maddow said ppl were shopping docs. Perhaps the person in her forged doc was Junior. When she didn’t bite they decided to be more brazen.

      However, I think the NYT reporter said he’d been working on this for about a year

      Correction not NYT reporter. Independent

    • Opalescent Riddles

      I worried more about it till Don Sr defended Jr as “high quality”. Sr’s typical modus operandi is to call “fake news” on inconvenient truths, but this time it’s different. To react this way, he’d have to be playing a real long game, or he just doesn’t think Jr did anything wrong. Given this family’s inept privilege, the latter is most plausible.

  • jaspersdad

    Looking forward to right wing media’s next polemic, where they argue that apples and oranges are essentially the same.

    • BackDoorMan

      … well, they’re both fruit, right? Both grow on trees, yes? So… same. Essentially.

  • rick

    Those of you who placed the bet:

    Trump will be out of Office by Labor Day.

    Please form a line to right to collect your winnings.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      Not yet. Not yet. But yes, it’s looking more and more hopeful.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I saw a guy purported to be from a centrist think tank saying that it looked to him like the administration would not complete its term. And this in just, what, 4 1/2 months? It’s a new record!

        • Persistent Tennessee Rain

          At the very least, his poll numbers should tank.

          • AuntyMaude

            Not to be a wet blanket, but I’ve had those hopes before. Then I see the polls and find that his brain-resistent loyal turds will follow that POS off a cliff.

        • Buzz1313

          I live in Indiana and I want to start a fake “Pence for Prez” movement to mess with Trump and his supporters. That’ll hasten his plunge into insanity, dontcha think?

          • Boscoe

            Actually better to just start referring to pence as the President, as if it was already a done deal. THAT will make Trump snap like a twig.

          • wavicles

            I just saw someone on the internet refer to him as President Pence.

          • wavicles

            President Pence

          • wavicles

            U.S. President Mike Pence.

        • Boscoe

          See? And you thought this administration wouldn’t make history…

    • FukuiSanYesOta

      I had “end of May” in the office pool. In a just world, it would have been end of january, but I hedged. Not long now, I hope.

    • whitroth

      I had nine months from Inauguration. A friend of mine, on the other hand, said Labor Day.

      Oh, the dog news days of Aug ain’t gonna be quiet *this* year.

      Maybe he’ll follow in the footsteps of tradition, and do it on 8 Aug… when Nixon resigned.

      • Jamespuck

        I’m hoping that it is Aug 11th. Be the best 50th Bday present I could receive. Maybe he jumps from the top of Trump Tower. Then they can blame the Clinton’s for pushing him.

        • Mike Steele

          If Russians don’t get adequate return on their investment, they’ll take care of this for all of us – believe me, Donald.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        Aww, Aug 8 is our wedding anniversary, that would be such a lovely romantic gift for us!

        (Didn’t know that about Nixon when I picked the date — which I did because of 8/8 and it was kinda a joke about Mr. having no excuse for forgetting it.)

        • whitroth

          Congrats. IIRC, it was my folks’, as well.

  • Kevin Pierce

    The Trump “Administration” or as I refer to it, Yakety Sax on endless loop
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxoUmh2FCX4

    • rubikcube

      I prefer the Theme from Jaws!!

    • pussygrabber in chief
    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Mohr funny if it were someone else’s country. Say, one without all the nukes.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    The talking head on CNN is saying that JuneYoor did nothing illegal and that this is just typical campaign stuff and “both sides do it.” The problem with that argument is the fact that JuneYoor straight up fucking DENIED any meetings with the Russians. So, if he did nothing wrong, why did he feel compelled to lie? Hengh?

  • rubikcube

    And for you, sir: the Deluxe bag of dicks. Bon appetit!!!

  • Bigby

    Fuck those fellators of traitors. I told them after Iran Contra, I told them after April Glaspie, I told them after “Bin Laden Determined to strike in US, I told them after “there aren’t any fucking WMDs these assholes are lying us into a stupid war”, I told them after “your dicks on 3 marriages are full of shit about Clinton and his stupid ass BJs”, I told them after “for the third fucking time, tax cuts don’t pay for themselves!”, and now we have 60 million fuckfaces in this country that WORSHIP this family of treacherous assholes and will double, triple, quadruple down on this worship, up to and including dictatorship, to put party before country, all the while telling us how much more “American” and “Patriotic” they are. They *enjoy* backing traitors.

    “~60% of Rethugs believe higher education is BAD for America” indeed…

    • Jamespuck

      They believe that higher education means taking a few bonghits before history class, then blaming the prof. when they fail.

  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    “My son is a high-quality person.”

    Who talks that way about their kid? It’s just fucking weird.

    • JayGoldenBeach

      “I have the best words… I’m like a smart person… My son is a high-quality person.”

      To be fair, Trump is consistently weird.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      “That bus doesn’t even DESERVE that kind of quality smashed under it’s wheels!”

    • ResistanceFictionista blondeiq

      Lord Denethor, High Steward of Gondor, right before he ran screaming off a cliff while on fire. That’s who. (Sorry for the spoiler).

    • BackDoorMan

      … when I heard that, I thought… “that’s an adjective you use when talking about flooring or fixtures or window treatments, NOT a person”. Then again, given that it’s Junior he’s talking about, the sentience is probably about the same.

  • bookish

    https://www.bloomberg.com/view/articles/2017-07-11/trump-s-defeated-defenders-can-only-whimper

    These dogs won’t hunt. These dogs have joined PETA and are moping around the house in “Meat Is Murder” T-shirts. And the fact that this is where supporters have ended up after mere hours of social media badinage tells you just how weak the defense is. As a general rule, at the point where you are pretending to have a shaky command of ordinary English words, you are losing the argument. Just ask Bill Clinton how convincing anyone found his creative interpretations of the verb “to be.”

    After months of suggesting that all the fears of Russian scheming to interfere in our elections were just so much hype and hysteria from a hopelessly biased media, the Trump family has now confirmed that they were not only aware of these efforts, but were hoping to help. It seems wildly implausible that news of both the Russian efforts, and his own campaign’s fellow-traveling, failed to reach Donald Trump Sr.

    • Ellen D.

      Ever notice how Donald always uses the present tense, or omits verbs entirely, on this particular subject? “There is no collusion.” “No collusion.”

      Odd, that.

      • Jamespuck

        You’re the collusion

    • Harbinger08

      ” It seems wildly implausible that news of both the Russian efforts, and
      his own campaign’s fellow-traveling, failed to reach Donald Trump Sr.”

      Yes, indeed. In fact Goldstone says it himself, “I can also send this info to your father via Rhona”, that’s pretty clear. I’m surprised that particular bit hasn’t drawn more comment in the reporting.

    • I’m increasingly certain that russian meddling did in fact alter the vote.

      It’s the only allegation that hasn’t yet been proved, but it’s getting closer and closer.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        The evidence at this point is coincidental based on the timing of some of his speeches. Physical evidence can’t be that far behind.

      • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

        The only way that “no votes were changed” remains plausible anymore is “because the hyper-wealthy still have the receipts for all those Trump votes they purchased in advance.”

  • sonaliraq

    BUT OBAMA WORE A TAN SUIT!!!!!

    • Suse

      And he looked specfuckingtacular!

    • Buzz1313

      Remember Obama… ? I miss having a president who spoke in complete sentences.

  • bookish

    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/07/11/donald-trump-jr-emails-smoking-gun-robert-mueller-240414

    Mueller has the power to bring criminal indictments as part of his work, but legal experts say it will take significant time — a year or more, even — before he reaches that point. In the meantime, Trump Jr. and all the other key figures in the case are likely to be called in for interviews and potentially grand jury testimony.

    A white-collar Washington lawyer who is representing a client mired in the Russia probe said there’s little doubt Mueller’s team welcomes what Trump Jr. just delivered about his Russia meeting via social media – that is, if they didn’t already have the messages through their own investigation.

    “They’ve been handed a smoking gun,” the attorney said. “What none of us know is what else he’s got. He may have had all these emails already. He may have reams of paper. There’s no way to know what’s under the water line in terms of this investigation.”

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      It’s easy to forget that Muellers original purpose was to investigate Russian interference in the elections. It wasn’t to make a case to impeach Trump. A special prosecutor can go in any direction though, and it looks as if he may be heading there.

  • Jamespuck

    Donald Jr. Is wonderboy. Sometimes I wonder about that boy and his lack of intellect. He is kinda special. Me thinkith the short bus stopped at Trump Tower to pick him up for his edjamacation.

    • Suse

      Probably brain damage from when Daddy punched him bigly in the head for not wearing a suit to a baseball game.

      • uniquename72

        Donald would never risk his manicure by punching someone.

    • puredog

      Such bus jokes violate the CRFR. JSIA.

      • Jamespuck

        Then go ahead an turn me in, sue me just like Trump and his followers would. You must be a Trumpkin.

    • Bud

      Jared Kushner reminds me of Elijah Woods character in Sin City.

  • Suse
  • subatomic

    Evidently you can not do treason if you are new to politics and/or stupid. Republicans are selling out our democracy by defending this shit.

    • Perkniticky

      Aww, just give Trump a chance – everybody makes mistakes! I’m sure he’ll be a great president once he get’s the hang of it. /s

      • Suse

        This has to be some kind of record for the least amount of time taken to destroy just about everything we hold dear.

        • Perkniticky

          You’re right, at this rate I don’t think we have time to let him get the hang of it.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        About this “hang of it…” Maybe we need to keep that phrase around, but in another context. What is the penalty for treason these days. “Bueller?” Oops, I mean, “Sessions?”

    • Buzz1313

      This is why you support experienced candidates. Back in ’08 they went on and on about how inexperienced Obama was (only he had political experience). In 2016 they excused Trump’s lack of experience because he’s such a great businessman-HAH! Now they have the nerve to say, “Give ’em a break, they’re new to this?” Fuck that noise! Team Trump being new to this isn’t a big secret and it’s a shitty excuse Republicans need to stop using. Bless their hearts.

    • amrak63

      Republicans have been selling out our democracy since before World War 2, when some “noble isolationists” were taking bribe money from Nazi Germany.

      GOP = CTP (Cruelty and Treason Party)

      • Le Chapeau

        The old Bush and his cronies wanted to depose FDR in a coup. During WWII, IBM, under Thomas Watson (who, under pressure, returned the big medal he got from Hitler) maintained and supplied all the IBM punch card machines, and provided the maintenance, and custom punch cards that the Nazis used to run the Holocaust across Europe, and collected the sequestered profits soon after the end of the war. The Final Solution was run with IBM, the Solution Company.

      • Bud

        Yes! My point exactly. If he were alive and an American today, Benedict Arnold would be a “conservative”. Traitors and assholes to the bone.

  • JayGoldenBeach

    It was easier to believe Trump’s kids were decent people when we knew nothing about them.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      That elephant tail pic was enough for me.

      • Suse

        Fucking loser!

      • Le Chapeau

        Me too.

      • Mike Steele

        And the cringe-inducing shots of Daddy’s Little Girl on poppa’s lap which have been circulating for decades…ew.

  • pussygrabber in chief

    Let me see if I’m understanding this. Jr. was hoping to collude with Russia to get damaging information on Hillary colluding with Russia?

    • Stulexington

      But she lied about that to instead talk about getting some sanctions lifted.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    So if I understand the Trumpkins correctly, when they say “argle bargle flaap grundle-burpshaaaart”

    Which I think means “he didn’t collude because he didn’t actually take possession of any stolen secrets, and please pay no attention to my former insistence that every single bit of this was all fake, made-up, non-existent fantasy. I am not a crank!”

    Or it means “I shit from my mouth, please help me I can’t stop”

    • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️

      It’s such a terrible defense and I love that they’re trying it – it’s still a crime to solicit a foreign national for aid, even if you don’t receive it.

  • Sekhmet1

    Good god. Uday is fucked, surely.

    • ResistanceFictionista blondeiq

      Oh, my day was fucked at 5:00 a.m. when the cat threw up, but thanks for thinking of me…

  • pussygrabber in chief

    “For I am Trump Jr., lord of the idiots.”

    • ResistanceFictionista blondeiq

      As I said to RSDSW last evening, “man, that boy’s bone stupid.”

    • Le Chapeau

      Is that anything like Lord of the Dance?

    • He’s the “Fredo” of the Trump family.

      • Bud

        The actor that played him, John Cazale, was dying of cancer when they were filming The Deer Hunter.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      lord of the ring dings

  • I turn my back on this entire trump cluster fuck for one day and look what happens.

    I’m going to turn my back on the trump cluster fuck more often.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Oh, we have you to thank. Well played!

      • Tip of my hat and a knowing wink your way.

    • Bud

      Turn your back during the baseball playoffs for me in a few months, daddy wants a World Series.

  • tex7

    Isn’t this enough to withdraw Kushner’s security clearance?

    • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️

      It’s nearly enough to put Kushner & Manafort in federal prison. It’s DEFINITELY enough to put Jr. in there, if anything was normal these days.

      • Weißwurst Supreme

        But since we live in bizarro world now, it means Jr. will get a cushy ambassadorship to somewhere nice and out of the way while Kushner rises higher in the administration and Manafort gets brought back on as a contractor.

        • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️

          That sounds about right. Failing upwards.

  • ResistanceFictionista blondeiq

    Hungarian Nazi Pajama Boy. Wasn’t he in the outtakes of Grand Budapest Hotel? Take your filthy hands off my lobby boy, you Hungarian Gorka, you!

  • JayGoldenBeach

    Trump has testified before Congress several times prior to officially running for president. He has imposed himself on the public most of his adult life. He is not new to the world of politics, but he is new to being held accountable.

    • Le Chapeau

      He may not be new to the world of politics, but he is absolutely ignorant of governing, not to mention also being completely incompetent at the parts of it that he thinks he knows.

    • Occam’s 8 ball

      Business men enjoy protections that politicians still dream of.

      • Old Man Yells at Cloud

        And vice versa.

  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    Dear babby jeebus, you know I don’t ask for much, but puhleeze make this treason-burger enough of a distraction that the goddamn Senate fails to destroy healthcare for tens of million Americans, puhleeze!!!

    • Le Chapeau

      I second the prayer.

      • Steve Haughn

        In God the father & Holy Ghost!

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      Not so fast, let’s have some fun with this. Let it fester so in 2019, we take back both houses and then can do a clean sweep of the Whitehouse, by impeaching Pence, blocking Lil’Donnie’s replacement VP nomination and then impeaching Lil’Donnie so Miss Nancy breaks the glass ceiling and takes the big chair. Then she can nominate Hillz for VP and return to her post as Speaker of the house. It would be the coup that caused every head in Faux offices to explode. And totally legal. Of course to pull it off the party leadership would need a spine.. well its fun to imagine.

      • HooverVilles

        EXACTLY! And sadly I think you are right about spine part.
        Sigh!

  • amrak63

    At this rate, the Trump Crime Family will soon yearn for the days when we were all preoccupied with talking about vegan buttholes.

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Automatic upfist for vegan buttholes.

    • Bud

      Do vegans eat buttholes?

      • BackDoorMan

        … only if they are free-range, gluten-free and organic.

  • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️
  • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️
  • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

    The Russian attorney is defending Junior. Hahahaha, if that’s all you got on your side you are in big trouble mister.

  • spangled

    TIMELINE:

    June 3
    Goldstone to Don Jr, “This is obviously very high level and sensitive information but is part of Russia and its government’s support for Mr Trump”

    June 7 4:20pm (lol)
    Goldstone to Don Jr, “Hope all is well. Emin asked that I schedule a meeting with you and the Russian government attorney who is flying over from Moscow for this Thursday.”

    later that day (this is the primary night speech)
    Donald Trump says “I am going to give a major speech on probably Monday of next week, and we’re going to be discussing all of the things that have taken place with the Clintons. I think you’re going to find it very informative and very very interesting”

    June 9
    Meeting with Russian lawyer, Don Jr, Paul Manafort, and Jared Kushner

    June 13 (“probably the Monday of next week”)
    Trump gives a speech in the wake of the Pulse shooting that begins, “This was going to be a speech on Hillary Clinton and how bad a President, especially in these times of Radical Islamic Terrorism, she would be.”

    They can’t say Donald Trump didn’t know about the meeting. He knew, and he was planning to give a speech about what he discovered from it.

  • ken_kukec

    Where’s the WTF email from Donnie Jr. to Goldstone after the meeting with the Russian lawyer, saying hey she didn’t show up with the stuff you promised?

    • Opalescent Riddles

      REALLY good point. If the meeting turned up nothing, you’d think there’d be a paper trail.

      • JurisGal

        Watching Hayes and he just asked the same question. Former prosecutor said something like Mueller and the power of the subpoena and the email “cc” will tell the tale.

  • Tommy Beard
  • AnniNoone

    I have seen this all over (I hope that poor stammering journalist never buys his own drink again) but I only now got it that he *tweeted the actual e-mails*. I mean…how…so stupid…literal proof of treason…stammering is the only appropriate commentary.

  • Dazza

    I just woke up and read the news.

    Holy Fuck.

    That is all.

    • Bud

      Go back to sleep, the gun fire from the civil war will wake you up.

      • Dazza

        As I live in Australia, I suspect I will just sleep in.

  • WideStance

    Junior “loved” the prospect of Russia’s willingness to share its espionage with the Trump campaign, “especially later in the summer” when the election was closer. The infamous DNC emails were from January-May 2016 and would have been newly hacked as of June 9, 2016, the date of the meeting with the Russian lawyer. Wikileaks, in fact, published the hacked DNC emails “later in the summer” on July 22, 2016.

  • outrageoftheday

    At this rate, by the time everything is exposed there will have been enough shoes dropped to fill Imelda Marcos’ closet. Any shoes dropped by Ivanka will be knockoffs of others’, “me too” confessions, only worse in quality.

    • outrageoftheday

      And we do all know that the Trumps are heels with no souls.

    • Bud

      Nice reference.

      • HooverVilles

        Second!

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    I have been busy being a contributing member of society today, and so did not have the time to keep up on my Wonkette headlines.

    Jeebus Skateboarding Christ on 5th Avenue!

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c03c2dc1d41fd898696d1022086b2c9c994b0eea49194ab998e9efad036fc3e9.jpg

    • HooverVilles

      That whole family ain’t right.
      FIFY.

  • “I didn’t know better, I’m new at this” wouldn’t get me out of a traffic ticket (any traffic cop will tell you that ignorance of the law is no excuse to speed/not wear your seatbelt/ make an illegal Uturn, etc.) and I’d stopped trying to use it as an excuse by the time I was 18. It absolutely infuriates me that anyone is still trying to let these assholes hide behind being new to politics.

    • Steve Haughn

      Your problem is, your last name isn’t Trump?

      • I really consider that less of a problem and more of a blessing. I don’t care how much money they have, I wouldn’t want to be from that family.

        • Steve Haughn

          ✔️🍾👌

        • HooverVilles

          Absolutely. Being in that family would be like living a particularly bad episode of The Twilight Zone !

        • BackDoorMan

          … same here. I may be poor, but thanks-be-to-all-the-gods, at least I’m not a Trump. No amount of lucre would be enough to counteract the filth of that name.

  • Steve Haughn

    I would like to offer a new comparison for Eric & Donnie, Goober & Gomer Pyle from ‘The Andy Griffith Show’? Have seen the Bevis & Butthead comparison & Fredo from ‘The Godfather’ etc., but hey just a new ‘spin’?

    • Bud

      That’s Beavis you lib’rl eleetist asshole.

  • Aniline

    > While the actual title is “prosecutor general of Russia,” this is a very
    high Russian government position! It is like the Russian Loretta Lynch!
    (Fuck you Jeff Sessions, you’re not worthy of your title.)

    Er,
    no. While Jeff is not worthy of the title, comparing Chayka to Loretta
    Lynch is a grave insult. Chayka is a criminal and the best buddy /
    collaborator / “business partner” of the worst Christian warlord in
    recent Russian history, Sergei Tsapok. Tsapok straight up owned several
    towns (including people), murdered and raped hundreds, and only got
    arrested when he massacred a whole village.

    Here’s the documentary about Chayka made by one of your boyfriends, Alexei Navalny:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eO8ZHfV4fk

    • lurch394

      I can understand why Goldstone would say “crown prosecutor” since he’s British born. However, considering what the Bolsheviks did to the czar and his family, it’s a bigly mistake to make.

  • Mirful

    Would somebody be nice enough to tell me just what the fuck a “high quality person” is.

    • JurisGal

      It is the kind of person trump has ” full confidence” in, one in the same…

    • Ann Linderman

      Exactly the same term Trumpy’s used in interviews to describe the current wife.

    • JJ O’Shaughnessy

      YOu have to remember that Donald is a Eugenicist. He has repeatedly talked about his “good Genes.” So he sees himself and his “sucess” as proof that he is a “quality” person. Which also explains why he reacts so badly to any suggestion that he is actually a fat gibbering idiot that has failed his way to the top, and is pretty much broke to the bargain. And that his hands are small. And that he is actually Bald.

      So, while everyone else looks at his suns and sees 2 fairly stupid, buck toothed ugly idiots, Donny sees proof of the fact his genes have mixed with quality and produced 2 wonderfully bred specimens of humanity, destined for success.

      Which, incidentally shows that Ivanka is proof that his genes are fantastic, despite the fact that without her massive amounts of plastic surgery she would be a buck toothed, ugly idiot with small tits.

    • Bud

      Same thing as a “premium beer” like Old Milwalke or however you spell The Beast longhand.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Like Rose Garden Trumpcare “victory party” for House members where they served Bud Light? Classy.

        • HooverVilles

          For the Trumpers Klassy is moar correctederer.

    • Petunia Cat

      It’s the term nouveau riche whinge merchants use to claim that they are as good as the upper crustians they imagine are obsessed with looking down on their shitty nouveau riche selves. The opposite, a low-quality person is what you say about somebody the upper crustians don’t like in order to suck up to them and their crust.

      Whereas you passive aggressively annoy the upper crustians, and anyone who reads, by saying “Have you read all those books?”

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        OMG, Becky. I had a coworker as me that one time when I had a house party. And my answer was “75% of them. The others are for reference. And these are just the ones that I might want to reread” all proud like. Yeah, motherfucker, I read.

        • Petunia Cat

          Good!!! 😊 📚📚📚📚📚📚 They want us to feel self-conscious, like reading is bad. Like it means we weren’t jocks in high school. 🙄 And should hang our heads. 😂😂😂

    • Panika MCD

      a really convincing robot?

  • outrageoftheday

    Just tell me that this will shut Tom Cotton up. He’s only second to Cruz in smarminess.

  • Scott Phillips

    Just another bad heir day.

    • Bud

      It is a mandatory Trump sperm thing to have to get your hair frozen to your head, except for Ivanka, who Donnie thinks is dreamy now that she has had a thousand surgical procedures to make her look like a human person instead of a Trump troll. Goddamn they are all ugly.

  • Vaara Thaumetergist

    When do we get to say Don Quisling and Quisling Junior…..?????

    • HooverVilles

      Boy does that have a nice ring to it.

  • Dumaiu

    It’s the tone of ol’ King Koopa’s response that I find interesting: ‘My son is a high-quality person and I applaud his transparency.’ Is that not unusually defeated-sounding, for him?

  • Jesse

    Did trump’s hack lawyer tell him “too much evidence to convict” is a real thing?

  • Jan Hutchinson

    This is all very, very enjoyable. This is a high quality story.

  • RMKH

    So does Cheeto throw his boy to the wolves or go down with him? I generally don’t wish harm or distress on anyone, but I am capable of making exceptions.

    • Rickyphoo

      Cheeto’s boy takes a fall, then Daddy pardons him, is my bet.

  • Toledo Window Box

    If Donald Trump slithers out of THIS one, he must surely be the actual Devil.

  • outrageoftheday

    Oh please, oh please Mr. Mueller, take down Jeff “Nazi Lollipop Guild” Sessions with the rest.

    • HooverVilles

      Yes! Sessions, Pence, Ryan ….
      As much of the line of succession as possible!

    • Rickyphoo

      also, too, if it’s not too much to ask, take Mike “Holier than Thou” Pence as well.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    For months I’ve been saying that I didn’t think even the Trumpkins were stupid enough to leave behind concrete evidence of their collaboration with the Russians.

    I regret the error and will try to do better in the future.

    • akryan

      I’m with you. I never thought that a smoking gun would ever actually appear. I was sure that everything was just going to go around in circles but eventually it’d all pass over. I forgot just how stupid the Trumps are. I’m still bearish on whether or not congress will do anything about it.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      You are forgiven. I never expected a family member to fall in the sword and just offer up the evidence, free and clear. Allegedly, Robert Mueller facepalm’ed also too.
      What any sane person would have expected was Manafort or Kushner to get busrolled, which makes me think those two, being not A Idiot, have already cooperated with the investigation!

      • UnsaltedSinner

        If they haven’t already made a deal, it sure is high time to do so.

    • HooverVilles

      Most/all of the congresscritters of the (R) persuasion will still support him because they know how desperate he is for any legislative accomplishment that he will sign anything they can pass.
      I really Really REALLY would like to be wrong on this, but IMHO don’t think I am.
      Sigh!

    • BackDoorMan

      … never misunderestimate the venal stupidity of the Trump Family… the only reason they’ve managed to fail upwards thus far is because they’ve had money (ill-gained, whatever) to shield them from consequences. They’ve conned a lot of people in the past, you weren’t the first, and won’t be the last.

  • akryan

    But her emails…

  • Rickyphoo

    I keep forgetting, is Don Jr.’s alter ego, Uday or Qusay?

    • armed_bears

      Yes.

    • Jay Hansen

      You mean Beavis or Butthole?

  • I’m from Russian government and I’m here to help

    As noon breaks on Manhattan’s upper west side, creepy Donald Trump Jr., with his permanently etched just about to fart face, greets the new day. Opening his laptop and gazing at the screen saver he secretly thinks, Father is right, Ivanka does have a tremendous rack.

    Glancing though the overnight e-mails, one subject line piques his interest: Russian spy seeks malleable scion for hot collusion. He finds stirring deep within himself a feeling never before felt, curiosity. Creepy DJTJR. opens the e-mail and begins to read: Hello, I’m from Russian government and I’m here to help.

    Boom!

    Bored with killing elephants and cutting off their tails, creepy DJTJR. begins the dialogue. Hey babe, he wrote, I’m totally down with hot collusion, what do you have in mind, and can I bring my two pals, Jared and Paul, is there enough hot collusion for them also too. Russian spy babe’s response sent a tingle down his leg: Sure DJTR, bring as many of Daddy’s inner circle as you like, I have dirty dirt on that dirty Hillary and Russian government wants to give it to you. I love it!, creepy DJTJR. Replied.

    And so began creepy DJTJR.’s journey into the dark heart of Pepeism and his historic place in the bottomless barrel of gop dickishness.

  • Jeffery Campbell

    From the brilliant mind of Adam Sank: http://adamsank.com/index/

    Have an email, Mr. Goldstone.
    Have a meeting, have some treason, have a thrill.
    A Fig Newton, Mr. Putin.
    Any dirt we have on Hillary we’ll be glad to spill!

    Have a hack, have a leak, have a crack, have a peak.
    Sell your country out for greed.
    Have a screw, have a brew
    Would you like to stage a coup?
    I’ll have Vladimir meet your needs!

    Here’s Don Junior, Mr. Goldstone.
    Anything to fool the voters we can do.
    Even loonier, Mr. Goldstone.
    Have a Trump kid, have two!
    Mr. Mueller, bring the ax.
    Finally we have the facts.
    Mr. Goldstone, we loathe you!

    (With apologies to Stephen Sondheim)

  • Kathleenrshaffer

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !ps115d:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
    !ps115d:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash405BuzzGoldGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!ps115l..,.

  • mscoulter

    I think the headline could have been better if you substitute Dumb for Guilty. His guilt is a given, being who he is, but I din’t know he was such a dumb fuck too!

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