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After all the anticipation, all the stupid Star Wars attack ads and the other stupid ads and even more stupid lying ads, the special election for Georgia’s Sixth Congressional District was today — polls are open until 7 PM Eastern, which is the time zone Georgia is in, conveniently, which means there’s a tad under an hour and a half left for people to vote. Here is where to find your polling place, unless it is full of lies.

Then we’ll all sit down and watch the returns on the TV, and make jokes about Steve Kornacki looking like Scooter from the Muppet Show, and because the polling had the race at about even, we’ll probably wait forever for the votes from one stupid precinct to come in. Then again, it’s just one district, so there’s no telling — it might go right quick.

While you’re waiting for the first returns to come in, you might take another look at why Karen Handel is a jerkface voting suppression doer, or at why the voting machines in Georgia suck, or why Jon Ossoff isn’t really Nancy Pelosi, or if you’re tired of election stuff you could read about that Florida Pork Chop again, we do not care.


Will Yr Wonkette be liveblooging? Nah, but Yr Dok Zoom will hang out in the Open Thread with you, as long as you send beer money. That’s what the “Donate” clicky is down there for. Also keeping Wonkette alive.

It is your OPEN THREAD!

UPDATE 10:36EDT: So it goes.

Also, some perspective from Joy Reid:

And so we get ready for this year’s gubernatorial elections in New Jersey and Virginia, and we’ll see you in the morning.

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  • Joe Beese

    A couple of Democratic senators from New England’s beachfront properties—Sheldon Whitehouse of Rhode Island and Richard Blumenthal of Connecticut—have come right up to the edge of saying what a great number of people have suspected for a while: Namely, that Michael Flynn, the former national security adviser and probably the worst executive branch hire since Albert Fall, has begun to sing sweet, sweet melodies to various investigators. If these two guys are right, then that would explain why everybody in the White House, except (possibly) the gardeners, are scrambling for lawyers. If these two guys are right, then the threat level on all things Russia (and, perhaps, all things Turkey as well) just went into the red zone.

    There is more than enough reason to believe that Flynn holds the keys to the kingdom. The president* went to great lengths to keep him around and, when that fell through, he went to great lengths to keep in touch with Flynn, at least for a while. And the leverage the FBI or Whoever has on him keeps getting ratcheted up. Moreover, if you read down through that ABC News story, you discover that Flynn attached himself to a completely harebrained scheme to develop some sort of US-Russia private partnership arrangement concerning nuclear power in precisely the worst place in the world to have loose nuclear fuel lying around.

    This guy has some stories to tell, certainly.

    http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/news/a55753/michael-flynn-cooperating-russia-investigation/

    • jesterpunk

      I wonder who else will offer to testify to save their asses.

      • Thiazin Red

        Could Conway be a dark horse in the who will cut a deal race? She wasn’t one of his early loyalists, and talks smack about them. She also might be one of the few people with information who isn’t directly involved.

        • jesterpunk

          Kellyanne did say last year that she thought Trump should release his tax returns then once she saw them after she started working for him he should never release them. Wonder what is in them that is that bad.

          • Msgr_MΩment

            Balls deep in the Dalmatian puppy fur coats industry.
            Bank on it.

        • Joe Beese

          I would be surprised if she had anything Mueller wanted. If Trump knew enough to ask Sessions to leave the room before grabbing Comey’s pussy, he knows enough not to let Conway sit in on anything juicy.

      • Crystalclear12

        AOT,K

        the race is on!

        • OutOfOrbit

          They may have closed the gate right behind Fink#1

          • Crystalclear12

            I have faith that some will jump the gate.

          • OutOfOrbit

            They will be climbing atop one another.

          • Claire

            Pence lawyering up had to have broken some floodgates.

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Riders up!

    • WotsAllThisThen
    • Msgr_MΩment

      This guy has some stories to tell, certainly.

      Myself, I’d buy him a beer and listen to his stories, but then it’s a slow day, and that’s just me.

  • Skeptical_thinker

    Will be results drinking.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    In the meantime, let’s laugh at a bunch of A Idiots.

    “According to a Bloomberg report, farmers in Kansas counties that voted for President Donald Trump are troubled by his widespread deportation of their largely-Latino workforce.

    “The threat of deportation and the potential loss of our workforce has been very terrifying for all of us businesses here,” Trista Priest, chief strategy office for Cattle Empire, a massive cattle operation that overwhelmingly employs Latinos.

    Seventy-seven percent of people in county where Cattle Empire operates voted for Trump, but according to Bloomberg, Priest and others “complained that the immigration policies emanating from Washington, 1,500 miles away, clash with the needs of local businesses.”

  • La forza del resistino
  • Picabo
  • Mr. Blobfish

    Went to the EEOC today. They say I have a good case for age discrimination against my former employer. Go, me!

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      I had to shut up a coworker in an interview debriefing when he brought up the applicant’s age. He wasn’t ready for that smack down. Glad he is not a decision maker.

    • I don’t try to get anyone fired because of anything they might be, aside from incompetent

  • WotsAllThisThen

    So with 0% reporting, who’s in the lead?

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Jeff Sessions.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Spicey’s empty podium.

    • Raan

      Lord Buckethead.

      • The Wanderer

        All hail Lord Buckethead!

    • proudgrampa

      Brexit.

    • Claire

      FOX will probably call the race for Handel any minute now.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    Disqus hates me today.

    • Soooo….day that ends in y?

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        Worse than usual. I’m getting notifications for comments that won’t show up here until I refresh and clicking the “new comment” bar at the top does nothing half of the time.

    • Finnabar87

      Disqus is having issues; you are cool. No worries.

  • Kiri the Unicorn

    Guys! Stop ‘bating because it will make your hands soft and ladylike, Return of Kings warns
    http://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2017/06/18/guys-stop-bating-because-it-will-make-your-hands-soft-and-ladylike-return-of-kings-warns/

    Hands? I don’t need hands. Not for that, anyway.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      I should share this with my gf, she’s been looking for a new hand lotion. Does it also work on chapped lips?

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        also makes a great hair gel..

      • Kiri the Unicorn

        Here’s the sign-up sheet for the field trials…

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Damn. It’s the only thing opposable thumbs are actually useful for.

    • The Wanderer

      Pshaw! Masturbation can hold off prostate cancer.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      I thought it gave us calluses and made us go blind

      MAKE UP YOUR MINDS!

    • Panika MCD

      I, for one, fully support RoK, their readers, PUAs and their clients never masturbating again. they should receive absolutely no sexual gratification ever in my book and that they’re doing so voluntarily is hilarious.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        as long as it doesn’t make them more shooty or rapey

        • Panika MCD

          that’s what the Walmart/FEMA camps are for. I mean, just because Bamz isn’t in office doesn’t mean he ceded his army of Beyonce clones and lesbian farmers.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            C’mon girls! Get in formation! We got some PUA’s and RoK’s to castrate!

          • Panika MCD

            meh. they’re castrating themselves. all we need to do is round them up, call the Amazon drone and have them shipped off to the WalmartWholeFoods/FEMA camps.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            send them to the Jade Helm tunnels…

    • hendenburg2
  • Crystalclear12

    For our Georgia members please refrain from drinking until after you vote.
    Thank you and we hope you enjoy your clusterfuck.

    • Finnabar87

      I am in the heart of the ATL.

      No driving tonight!

  • Finnabar87

    White women of a wealthy county can – and are – using this election to make up for the fact they helped put that fucking idiot Trump in the WH.

    • Meccalopolis

      I really hope so

    • Claire

      I hope you’re right, but I suspect anyone dumb enough to vote for Trump is too dumb to realize they have anything to make up for.

    • Panika MCD

      seems to be that women of all political stripes plan on running in the next election as well. it’s going to be an interesting 2018, but let’s get the 2017 races in the bag *scowls at El Paso* first.

  • OddMan

    There are parts of the country where low paying factory jobs are going without workers. These are factory jobs that will be gone in 5 years because of automation. Instead of a fix, our Commerce Secretary has suggested that the answer is a couple of drinks.
    https://twitter.com/DPAQreport/status/877218510576996352

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      Will that make any more sense if I read the article?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Wilbur Ross just doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he has the moral compass of a piece of dog shit.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Yes, if only they knew the factory wasn’t a terrible place. In other words, if only we didn’t think they were morons.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Sounds like a typical R plan. “Let’s create alcoholics, give them no access to rehab then they won’t be able to figure out how bad we’re fucking them over.”

      • Claire

        I guess the opiates aren’t enough, now they have to hook people on margaritas and cocktail weenies.

      • Panika MCD

        but if alcohol is legal, how will they fuck the German immigrants?

    • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

      And WaPo? You made the “then-than” swap. Again.

    • Claire

      Yep. My quota of dumb has been exceeded for the day. I’m into my rollover dumb from this weekend now.

    • Stulexington

      So he wants to solve the economic crisis with beer goggles.

    • OddMan

      Ya’ know, I’m on my second bourbon and branch, but old Wilbur there don’t look or sound any better. It’s gonna take something a lot stronger Wil.

    • Skeptical_thinker

      Drinks and a tap with a blackjack? Is that how interviews are being done now?

    • cheetojeebus

      Wilbur “Naked Mole Rat” Ross is a fucking shitgibbon ball sucking nitwit. That is all.

    • Panika MCD

      is this like the beerish concoction that the Egyptians fed to the slaves that built their pyramids?

    • hendenburg2
      • CindyinEncinitas

        Oh FFS! This, much like “Cake Hunters,” makes me want to shoot my tv.

        • hendenburg2

          It was a parody

          However, the “Artisanal” Photoshop brushes are actually a real thing

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Fuck artisanal everything.

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter
  • Anna Elizabeth

    I walked 3 miles again today, in tennis shoes just to be different. I didn’t talk to anyone, or even use my voice today, because I’m sick of people.

    • Finnabar87

      As an introvert, I did learn the hard way I need to see fellow humans now and again.

      And even speak to them!

      • CindyinEncinitas

        *gasp* What for?????

        • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

          To ask them to move?

      • Msgr_MΩment

        It’s true. — fellow innie.

      • The Wanderer

        My job forced me to change my personality from introvert to extrovert. I look forward to retirement so I can change it back.

        • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

          I change mine back every evening and weekend.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I’m not an introvert, I’m just sick of the human race right now.

    • OutOfOrbit

      You are not the only one feeling that way today.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Walking is good though. Too hot to walk here…

    • proudgrampa

      So Erasmus was walking along one day and slipped, falling off the edge of a cliff but holding on by his fingernails.
      “Oh, God! Oh, God! I don’t wanna die!” says Erasmus.
      “ERASMUS! THIS IS THE LORD! DO YOU BELIEVE?”
      “Wha–? Oh YES, Lord I believe!”
      “ERASMUS,IF YOU BELIEVE, LET GO!”
      “HUH??? B-b-but if I let go-”
      “ERASMUS! IF YOU BELIEVE, THEN LET GO!”
      “Well, OK Lord! I’ll let go. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH-” THUNK!

      “I HATE PEOPLE…”

  • jaspersdad

    I can’t believe the amount of money being spent on this special election. Citizens United has got to go.

    • BosGrl

      When you think of the many, many ways that money could have been spent…

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        But denying 34 million people healthcare is more cost efficient than say, poisoning drinking water.

    • Panika MCD

      pays for a lot of FOs, though. they’re using theirs on BS commercials. haha.

  • CindyinEncinitas

    I wonder what Pork Chop got for Father’s Day.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      Syphilis

      • CindyinEncinitas

        Of course Pork Chop would bareback it. Giddyup Pork Chop, you stupid fuck!

  • Bill D. Burger

    ot ..but I hadn’t seen this. Jim Acosta of CNN just loses it after that creepily censored ‘press briefing’ yesterday where no audio or video was allowed. Spicer is “…useless” and daily the briefings are “…becoming more and more bizarre” and a sad “…new normal for the American people.”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MIlKLgiibjM

    • Panika MCD

      they linked it in the first Spice Spice Baby article this morning.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    CAPTION: “You see? Ossoff hangs out with monsters. I bet he even likes canned clams.”

    — the Handel campaign.

    • m3bosha

      Some people say he microwaved fish in the office!!

  • Crystalclear12

    I don’t think I would pick the lawyer of lost causes to defend me but, hey, what could possibly go wrong?
    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/06/jeff-sessions-hires-attorney-who-defended-christian-school-that-banned-interracial-dating/

    • Stulexington

      There’s something symbolic with that decision.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      They deserve each other.

  • PixieThis

    “….This just out of Czechoslovakia….however this election turns out, it’s good news for John McCain!….”

    • SterWonk

      Am I the only one who, when they see the word “Czechoslovakia”, hears General Orlov from Octopussy talking about moving tank divisions?

      • hendenburg2

        Bonus points if you remember his weird-ass cadence

        • PixieThis

          We just watched that as part of our In Memory of Roger Moore as James Bond marathon.

        • SterWonk

          YES! Exactly that!

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Bratislava libel!

  • Vincent Ricola

    I had a very vivid dream last night. I was sitting in a dark movie theater with Steve Bannon (who had a huge amount of popcorn in a KFC bucket and an old-school Big Gulp) and Jared Kushner (who kept falling asleep), watching the black and white version of the Uninvited. I kept thinking I should be asking important questions since I had such close access, but Bannon’s mouth was always full and Kush’s head kept drooping back. Then I woke up.

    I’m thinking I may need a vacation.

    • Panika MCD

      do. not. reach. into. the. popcorn. bucket.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F4qzPbcFiA

    • Rick Hill

      I’ve had several dreams where I’ve met up with Obama, but then, he’s Obama. No other notables ever turn up. I’d say you definitely need some therapy and/or a lot of vodka

  • Joe Beese

    Daniel Day-Lewis announces his retirement from acting; will drink no more milk shakes.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5d9BrLN5K4

    • Zonath

      A lot of people don’t know this, but Daniel Day-Lewis played a Republican in the film “Lincoln”. Does anyone know that? A lot of people don’t know!

  • Randy Riddle

    Osoff supporters have been coating their yard signs with Vaseline and glitter to keep them from getting stolen and putting American flags on them to keep them from getting set on fire.
    http://boingboing.net/2017/06/20/how-to-stop-political-lawn-sig.html

    • BosGrl

      Sigh.

  • Panika MCD

    while you’re waiting–if you aren’t at a phone bank right now–Texas Monthly decided to blow its load before the special session on who they thought were the best and worst legislators of the year.

    http://www.texasmonthly.com/politics/the-best-and-worst-legislators-2017/

    here’s what I had to say about it:

    a) they should have waited until after the special to do this because the best is yet to come. maybe they’ll do a special best/worst. it’s not a terrible list, but I do take some issue with some of the choices.

    b) Texas Monthly may well have wanted to include itself in “The Worst” this session because they were the ones who gave Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick Dannie Goeb the platform to launch the bathroom bill beyond something to point to during the re-election campaign as “filed” and named it “must-pass”. they actively promoted his religious crusade and then said, “oh, we’re going to back away from so much political coverage now!” which was bullshit. Kolkhorst got hood-winked by Goeb, when she realized this she was threatened by him and she was pretty broken up about it and, well, just a broken person for 2 weeks. had the publication not decided to play hooky themselves this session, they would have seen that. they might have also heard that the now recovered Kolkhorst is unlikely to put her name on the bill in the special session. (I have my money on Campbell and her “we even lock the doors of the bathrooms in our own houses!” line which is acceptable if you’re a parent, but the rest of us leave the door open.) they might have even reported the rumor that Kolkhorst is considering primarying the twit that got her in such hot water in the first place.

    c) I don’t think it’s fair to add Farrar to the worst list just to have a second Democrat on it. hey, Sen. Lucio Jr. sided with the GOP most of the time which is not so effective for his district if they want a second Democrat on the list. he’s voted against his district so often in the past few sessions that his son, Rep. Lucio III, has made his social media mantra “I’m not my dad!” besides, many people find the legislative process to be boring as hell. having a little comedy thrown in to engage people is not a bad idea and it was just one of her bills. I doubt the editors could do better.

    d) and where’s Bettencourt? everyone working the West side of the Pink Dome will tell you that he is THE WORST. the guy even managed to take all the joy out of the chicken bill. what kind of monster does that? and if one is going to take Hancock to task for his dressing down of TAB, Bettencourt needs a prominent spot on the list. Hancock got himself in the dog house for that one, for sure. but Bettencourt was absolutely hysterical when it was his turn. he screeched. and he continued to do so in hearing after hearing until the chairs–fairly conservative ones like Estes and L. Taylor at that–were forced to pull all his bills from committee hearings for a week and a half. and even then he thought he’d make it up to everyone by subjecting us to MORE FOGHORN LEGHORN. if that doesn’t make you THE WORST, I don’t know what does. on top of that, his dressing down of local government officials and business organizations included some very creative interpretations of famous quotes. he seems to think the Gettysburg Address was an anti-annexation screed (umm…Texas v. White anyone?) and that FDR’s “We have nothing to fear, but fear itself” was about school vouchers where “fear itself” seems to be adequately funding public schools (WWII, funding religious institutions and scam artists with public money–what’s the difference?).

    e) finally, and most importantly, since they brought up the Schaefer amendment multiple times, they might have wanted to call it something other than the “papers please” amendment as it contained a lot more shit than that. Geren’s efforts to turn the bill into a validation of current federal law were admirable and reducing the Schaefer amendment to just one of the components that made it stink to high heaven doesn’t really help. again: stop playing hooky, Texas Monthly.

  • jaspersdad

    Someone stole the toe from the Downtown Hotel in Dawson City.

    “The traditional Sourtoe Cocktail — a Klondike-inspired invention — involves a shot of whisky with the digit bobbing in the glass. The toe must touch the brave drinker’s lips.

    The hotel’s posted fine for swallowing or stealing the toe is $2,500. It had been $500 until August 2013, when a patron gulped back the entire cocktail — toe and all — and slapped $500 on the table.”

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/north/toe-stolen-yukon-dawson-city-sourtoe-cocktail-1.4168541

    • Randy Riddle

      Has anyone checked Bannon’s liquor cabinet?

      But, then again, how could anyone tell it from the other pickled toes there?

      • Anna Rompage

        More like has anyone checked Bannon’s feet for missing toes….

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Has anyone seen Bunny Lebowski lately?

      • Raan

        “Programs! Programs here! Can’t tell one picked toe from another without a program!”

    • Msgr_MΩment

      So much for a good night’s sleep tonight. Thank you so much.

    • BosGrl

      Why? I mean, why?

      • jaspersdad

        Legend has it that the original toe had been preserved in the alcohol since the 1920s, when guys in the area were running moonshine by bobsled. Their toes would freeze in the winter weather conditions, and it was easier just to cut off the frozen toe than find help.

        • BosGrl

          So… it’s like tequila? Only instead of a worm there’s a toe?

    • Guys, this is like, a famous Candian thing. I fully expect Justin to tweet about it

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Sometimes I feel I just don’t know you people.

    • QHarp, Mujer malévola

      I’m sorry– did they find a new toe after the first one was swallowed, or did they, um, recover the original one? Either way, I’m sure this will turn out to be a very valuable lesson in not asking questions you don’t want to know the answer to.

      • jaspersdad

        It was a brand new toe. Donated by a gentleman who had it surgically removed. The toe has to sit in a salt solution for months before they use it. There’s a picture of it in the link.

        • QHarp, Mujer malévola

          Aww. That’s kinda sweet.

    • Claire

      That toe looks like a cockroach, oh my god. If I were drunk enough to drink that cocktail, I’d be drunk enough that drinking it would be really unwise.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Ot but today THIS happened:
    Oh goddamn….ewww! Marco Rubio welcomed Ivanka Trump to the Capitol to meet with lawmakers about tax reform. (I know. WTF is she doing there?)
    They shared what might categorize as a “hug,” but we’re not sure. It’s got to be the most fucking awkward embrace ever. Cringe worthy!
    Rubio goes in for the embrace; she freezes. Hilarity and A W K W A R D N E S S … ensues.

    https://twitter.com/markgongloff/status/877198632361086976

    Oh NO…..just NO!
    lmao

    • BosGrl

      That woman can’t keep men from touching her without her consent. Too bad she won’t speak up about it.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        I’m thinking lil omega wolf Rubio was terrified because he felt he was supposed to hug her but was afraid of facing the wrath of the alpha wolf for touching his bitch

        • BosGrl

          I can imagine He Went to Jared getting that kind of scary quiet angry, but I can’t imagine him actually doing something about it.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      It was awkward because he had to stand on a box and she didn’t hit her mark.

    • Zonath

      She’s not used to hands larger than her father’s touching her.

    • Joe Beese
      • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

        My story about stuffed animals living in Lower Manhattan. King Kong has captured MacDuff the Police Dog. Peng Gwinn and others are in the coffee shop getting the news…

        The barista came back. “Where was I?”

        “Kong grabbed MacDuff,” said Peng.

        “And MacDuff yelled–”.

        “TAKE YOUR FILTHY PAWS OFF ME YOU DIRTY APE!” they all said in unison.

        “How did you know?” asked the barista.

    • jesterpunk

      Awkward hoverhand.

    • BosGrl

      A rich woman that nobody elected meeting with lawmakers about how she can stuff more money into her pockets is obscene.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Again – who elected her? If Sasha or Malia went to the Hill to meet legislators the outcry could have been heard on Saturn.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Marco Rubio’s got the hands of a Craig’s List strangler.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        probably bought them on Craig’s List

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Hey, Guys, be fair! She’s the moderating influence for all rich ladies with shitty fashion companies in the White House. She’s just looking out for the poor, overtaxed rich handbag designers.

    • clubseal

      The new variant of the Christian side hug?

    • Panika MCD

      “now I know how Tiffany feels every time Dad tries to do to her what he does to me. I didn’t know I could feel anything anymore.”

    • alpacapunchbowl

      What’s that chunk of her hair doing? Aside from make her look like a Park Avenue scarecrow.

    • Bemused

      New Yorkers are not huggers. They are air kiss people. You have to know your body language dialects. Code-switch better, Marco.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      It’s a reflex she’s had since she was 12.
      For some reason.

    • and still the grossest thing for rubio is sucking up to the peestain.

      gross.

  • Claire
  • Joe Beese

    April 2017: ““Well if China is not going to solve North Korea, we will. That is all I am telling you.”

    June 2017: “While I greatly appreciate the efforts of President Xi & China to help with North Korea, it has not worked out. At least I know China tried!”

    Get solving, fat boy.

    • Meccalopolis

      Gee, I wonder if flynn being flipped by the FBI has anything to do with this

    • Rick Hill

      I’ve seen a few comments: “Well, now NK has done it! trump isn’t going to let this student’s death go unanswered!”

  • The Wanderer

    The dumbass woman who let a snake bite her baby is off the hook. The State Attorney in her county ruled that there was no intent to abuse the child, therefore no charges.

    Dumbass.

    • BosGrl

      My outrage meter is already at 11. It’s about ready to blow.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Hit the deck! It’s gonna blow!

    • Claire

      Jesus take the wheel. Was she one of those snakey religious people or something?

      • The Wanderer

        Dunno. Probably wanted to teach baby to avoid snakes.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        Just a Florida (wo)Man

        • The Wanderer

          Yep, Florida Woman.

    • clubseal

      I would have thought child endangerment was a general intent crime, unless she was charged with something else.

      • The Wanderer

        Well, you know, Florida.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      no reckless endangerment?

    • I know a joke

      It’s an open-and-shut case of endangerment, surely.

    • Panika MCD

      in other news: Steve Irwin posthumously exonerated for sticking his baby’s head in a crocodile’s mouth.

    • HazooToo

      What

    • Anna Rompage

      Alex, I’ll take ” A Dingo ate my baby” for $1000…

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Recreational pot delayed in Nevada as a judge issued injunction barring any business but liquor distributors from getting licenses. https://twitter.com/thenvindy/status/877289135412658176

    • Msgr_MΩment

      You posted two hours late, dude.
      And Dave still isn’t here, man.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Remember drive-thru liquor stores? Good times. Good times.

      • BadKitty904

        Remember? There’s one just across the river from us.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        especially the ones on the Interstate

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        We still have them here.

      • mancityRed6

        Joplin, MO. still open as of a couple of years ago, probably still today.
        https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7bf336ba9df4d0d7b4a1cc7dc43928adea3f91ed79423fd9c711d7bd8e6d36b0.png
        I’d hate to work there, they shut the doors after you in the winter, you don’t even have to leave the car, just tell them what you want and they do the running. I once lived 3 blocks from here.

      • CindyinEncinitas

        I do. In Texas. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

        • efoveks

          I know of one in Stockton, one in San Jose, and one in Pomona. All three places were known as easy places to buy when I was not quite 21. ;-)

        • Werewolf

          Had them in Florida when I was growing up.

      • Claire

        There was one half a mile from my high school. It had Star Wars and Galaga machines and didn’t card for cigarettes. You can guess where the local school-ditching spot was.

      • Tania

        In Australia we call them bottlos and they stock a magical array of products.

    • Panika MCD

      they want people drunk and high?

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Well, the law said for the first 18 months liquor distributors would have exclusive rights, but after that the Dept. of Taxation could open it up to others. A bunch of small distributors sued, saying after 18 months all the medical marijuana shops would get the licenses and shut them out of the market.

        • Panika MCD

          how sad for them.

          • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

            They are okay with a monopoly if it is their monopoly.

      • mancityRed6

        you really think they’re gonna have enough money for both?
        also, the liquor stores are gonna start stocking funyuns and doritos.

    • Joe Beese

      This angers me.

    • Claire

      In my state we only just recently got the ability to buy wine and beer at grocery stores instead of having to go to state-run liquor stores, and the state-run liquor stores fought it tooth and nail. Liquor store owners are hardcore motherfuckers when it comes to defending their monopolies.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      What does the Gaming Commission say?

  • BadKitty904

    Jeez, Dok, sorry – I thought the last post was the open thread. My bad.

  • Joe Beese

    Batman & Robin 20th Anniversary Celebration

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkTHtWX7CCY

  • I know a joke

    Oh this shit again. Weird and unexpected.

    https://twitter.com/zatchry/status/877285645542182914

    • BosGrl

      I’ll take the status quo drone, please.

      • HazooToo

        1000 times over.

      • I know a joke

        But what has the status quo ever given us, aside from more jobs and better healthcare

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      A lefty socialist would so so well in Georgia. Ossoff must have rigged the system to keep them from running.

      • Panika MCD

        but. his. emails!

        • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

          And his snail mails!

          • Panika MCD

            and his escargot! oh the humanity!!!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Because in every other aspect of life, your choice is always between Hitler and Jesus. What a fucking moron.

    • Bill D. Burger

      These dumb purist fuckers will be the death of the party and the country:
      THIS just today:

      POLITICS
      Jill Stein Isn’t Sorry
      The Green Party candidate has no regrets, even as Democrats accuse her of helping elect Donald Trump and cozying up to Vladimir Putin she says she would do the same over again.
      By BEN SCHRECKINGER June 20, 2017

      http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/06/20/jill-stein-green-party-no-regrets-2016-215281

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I feel better about hating her every day.

      • Amelia Resists and Persists

        I’m sure that no regrets includes all the money she grifted from grieving liberals for “recounts” too. Bitch.

        • I know a joke

          So many people yelled at me when I kept saying it was a scam.

          And then it turned out to be a scam, who could have predicted.

      • I know a joke
        • HazooToo

          That part of her can go fuck every other part of her. Dry.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Yeah, undocumented immigrants who have been here as productive members of society for 20 years are laughing too as they get jailed, separated from their families, and deported.

          • Resistance Fighter Astraea

            It’s their employers who are the true victims :( :( :(

        • Claire

          You know, I really wanted to vote Green Party at the micro level in the last couple of elections. I really did, for various reasons. But they just gave me shit to work with. I’d look through the little candidate blurbs online and the Green Party candidates would either have blank ones or weird rambling ones that looked like they were written by stoned libertarians at three in the morning before the deadline date. I can’t vote for the guys in Dude, Where’s My Car? just because I want to see progressive representation on my school board.

          • I know a joke

            If it makes you feel any better, the US Greens have zero interest in the environment or any tangible progressive policies.

          • Claire

            Apparently that is the case, since they don’t seem to have any sort of party platform beyond “Vote for us cuz whatever, dude.” I’ll just have to hope someday a socialist runs here instead of Seattle, I guess.

      • Jenny

        Eh she’s laughing now and can claim she didn’t get any russian money but I have a feeling Mueller will be looking at her too. For “balance.”

    • mancityRed6

      at least the status quo drone will take me out to dinner before _maybe_ fucking me over

    • jesterpunk

      Oh its a purity pony.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Who is this guy and why the hell do I care what he thinks?

      • Everrett Fanuelli

        11 likes and 5 RTs. Looks like not many people care.

      • Vincent Ricola

        I think he sung love ballads in the 80s?

    • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

      Purity troll want purity

    • Vincent Ricola

      I didn’t realize Kenny Powers was so politically-minded.

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      When option 1 is “hateful maniac”, and option 2 is anything better, even if not ponies-and-rainbows perfect, if you really have to bitch about making the choice, you need professional help.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      “Your house is on fire! I’ll call the Fire Department!”
      “Hell no! I’d rather see my house in ashes than have it saved by firemen who have a border collie instead of a dalmation!”

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Whenever I see this purity crap I think of that Bernie delegate from Maine that was interviewed during the convention. She even had a Bernie tattoo. These people make me want to punch myself in the dick.

      • jesterpunk

        Dont forget the annoying as hell Bernie California delegates in the DNC. Their stupid ass beans for Bernie and their temper tantrums.

      • tomamitai

        I think of the PUMAs who hated on Obama after he clinched the nom in ’08.

    • mancityRed6

      most of these people don’t remember a thing about the W years, and their history classes probably didn’t get far enough to touch the Reagan years. but if (x number of months that Donnie dumbo gets to be president) doesn’t sway them, then let them move to Utopia.

    • DainBramage

      Wah! My hot fudge sundae has slightly fewer ground nuts on top than I would prefer!

      • mancityRed6

        then join the Green party, they have lots of nuts.
        (I couldn’t resist)

    • Anna Rompage

      I wonder if these folks know how democracy works…

      A bunch of people throw their hat into the ring, the electorate then takes a preliminary vote, and the top 2-3 with the most votes run against one another in the general election…

      If these folks want someone more progressive, they they should run someone who can land in the top 2-3 spots…

      • Everrett Fanuelli

        If anything about last year’s DNC shows anything, it’s that these folks don’t know how democracy works.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Because Leon fucking Trotsky is gonna do great in Georgia.

    • Everrett Fanuelli
      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I was just thinking, these folks would be a real fucking barrel of laughs to go out to eat with.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          The “gluten-free, just because” crowd.

        • therblig

          i could stare at carrie brownstein’s face all day. there’s just something about it.

      • The Wanderer

        (Joanne Worley voice): “Is this a chicken joke?”

    • Claire

      People like this are idiots, but I wonder how many of them even vote. If this guy isn’t voting for Republicans or getting significant numbers of people who would otherwise vote D to stay home, I don’t give a shit what he says on Twitter.

      • I know a joke

        It’s actually a few people, but Disqus doesn’t like to show Tweets accurately, because it is actively user hostile.

        • Claire

          Twitter only shows you how many people liked, commented, or retweeted. It doesn’t tell you how those people voted, or if they voted. I’m not discounting the role of social media in the Idiocracy, but in a world of finite time and resources when even outrage hits the wall eventually, I see a lot more focus on the purity brigade than I see on taking action to secure voting rights or getting non-voters to the polls.

          Not that it’s not legitimate to be pissed off about both. I just feel like all sides are letting the narcissism of small differences take up way too much argument space.

  • HazooToo

    I am exhausted today, does anybody have any funnies?

    • BosGrl

      Knock knock

    • Panika MCD
      • HazooToo

        Ok, that was pretty weird! Is it more like High School in there, or Kindergarten?

        • Panika MCD

          depends on the day and the chamber you’re in.

    • Panika MCD

      Sessions hired a criminal lawyer in Russia-ghazi.

      • HazooToo

        And I believe someone mentioned his lawyer had other racist clients in the past.

    • Panika MCD

      the NFL is threatening to boycott TX should the bathroom bill pass (despite a carve-out for such events that none of their fans are going to notice or, if they do, will see as pandering bullshit) and Gov. Wheels thinks he’s in some position to admonish them.

      http://247sports.com/Bolt/Report-NFL-prepared-to-withhold-Super-Bowl-from-state-of-Texas-53236531?liveconnect=F0-95-F9-28-EE-39-D0-67-66-BA-DB-49-CC-26-64-97170619_124532DallasCowboys

      • I know a joke

        The NFL makes (I think) $13 billion dollars a year. They really don’t have to give a crap what anyone says to them.

        • I know a joke

          (That’s roughly twelve times Trump’s entire fortune, every year)

        • I know a joke

          OK, I just checked, and that’s about right – it’s the single largest sports franchise in the world, and makes as much money as major league baseball and the NBA combined.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      When is a door not a door?

      • HazooToo

        When?

        • Meccalopolis

          When it’s open. Wait…

        • WomanInThePersistence

          When it’s ajar.

          I love this one, and have since third grade.

          • HazooToo

            That’s pure cute.

          • therblig

            back when cars had talking alerts (80’s) whenever our team rented a car in orlando, i would put the key in the ignition, turn it to on, and ask “when is a door not a door?”

            then i would open the door and the car would say, “a door is ajar”.

            and that was almost 20 years before i became a dad.

      • Beautiful Soup

        When is an eye not an eye?

        • Beautiful Soup

          When the wind makes it water. I like this one even though I can’t recall the wind ever making my eyes water.

          • Visit Canada anytime from Late November to early March. I rarely leave the house without crying

          • Monty Market

            ride a bike.

          • should have read downthread.

            exactly.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Ooohh – good one!

          • this happens to me nearly everyday on my bike.

    • Doug Langley

      Saw this on You Tube today:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMEnnY0m1sk

      • HazooToo

        That is so cuuuuute!

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      A Proton walks into a bar. Barman: “We only sell to protons, are you sure you are a proton?” Proton: “Yes, I’m positive”

      • HazooToo

        Thank you, Sheldon.

  • BosGrl

    I have no expectations of this election going in our favor. Fool me 36 times, etc.

    • I know a joke

      The electronic voting machines are not secure and they don’t have an audit trail.

      What could possibly go wrong.

      • Anna Rompage

        The fact that there’s not one conservative in Georgia smart enough to hack the system?

        Sure, the intent is there, the skills however likely are not…..

        • Claire

          Yeah, but there have to be a lot of groups watching American politics who haven’t missed the fact that this election is getting a lot of press and a lot of weight. The odds that none of them are smart enough to hack an insecure system seem slim.

          • Monty Market

            The Russians will do it. They have proven experience.

        • mancityRed6

          and she was in charge of them for awhile, no?

        • tomamitai

          Maybe they outsourced it to a certain neighbor of the other Georgia, or to a 400lb guy living in his mother’s basement?

    • Bemused

      Also it’s an R+8 district.

    • jesterpunk

      Why would anyone think there are issues in Georgia, its not like they had issues in the 2016 election. Oh wait.

      http://www.ajc.com/news/state–regional-govt–politics/state-looking-reports-more-georgia-vote-machines-flipping-votes/gjapagdPtQbxsn7ZZMTqXN/

    • mancityRed6

      if it’s single digits, Republicans are going to be very wary of the next year and a few months.

      • Nothing short of victory pleases me at this point.

        • mancityRed6

          I don’t hold any faith in off years. someone getting barely beaten is good enough for me, especially in a district that red.

      • BosGrl

        I know, I keep hearing that with these special elections, “don’t worry, it’s good that it’s close”, but we need a win.

        • mancityRed6

          in as big of a red district this is, if he loses by less than 5 points, I fully expect the AHCA vote to not happen as soon as they want. even if they’re just a bunch of old white men, they do have their eye on the long game.

        • tomamitai

          We need LOTS of wins.

        • Up In Smoke O’hontas

          FWIW, this is the only down ticket race the DCCC has gotten intensely involved in…I have a full inbox to testify that they tried, at least…although I have a really hard time with their constant ALL HOPE IS LOST SEND MONIES pitch.

        • yes and yes. totally agree with you don’t think he’s going to win and we need one.

          badly.

          healthcare is killing me.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Agreed. The Bernie Bros are probably staying home because Ossoff isn’t pure enough.

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender
  • Apple Scruff

    So this is happening: https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/877247849041465347

    Does anyone know what the “two memos” Jeff Session reference is? I saw trending on Twitter earlier today.

  • DainBramage
    • WomanInThePersistence

      Cheers!

    • I loved that show

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I am making a mint Julep or two tonight. Picked up some fresh mint this aftternoon, have some infusing in the simple syrup right now.

      • DainBramage
      • Meccalopolis

        Mull it, ya gotta mull it, said my old boss at the French market

      • Jamoche

        I learned how to make mojitos Sunday. Bartender is the best kitchen job on a hot day – you’re the one with the nice ice-cold shaker while everyone else is cooking.

      • tomamitai

        I’ve never had a mint Julep. I looked up the recipe once and decided it was too much trouble. Plus, I like the taste of Bourbon and usually only dilute it with water and ice instead of trying to hide it with a flavored mixer. Oh well, as they say, the gusty bus nonce is poo tandem!

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          Never had one, wanted to give it a try. Besides, the bottle of Bulleit bourbon I picked up yesterday came with a complimentary julep cup, so…

          • tomamitai

            Oh, well, if you got the cup, you got to try it at least once!

    • Joe Beese

      Krysten Ritter shore is purty.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Completely O/T, but I had a very nice day. It was my annual review (which I always dread). And the first words my boss said were “You do a fantastic job.”

    My boss, whom I adore, is not somebody who believes in excessive praise.

    *happy dance*

    • This is correct. Because you are awesome and fantastic

    • jesterpunk
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      My day was great too. During ESY a student with autism punched an EA in the stomach and screamed for 25 minutes.

      • BosGrl

        Must have been a bad day for the autistic student too. I hope you are both recovering tonight.

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          I’m fine I wasn’t the one who was punched.

          • BosGrl

            I meant from the screaming, but I hope your coworker is OK too.

      • HazooToo

        Ok I know that’s not supposed to be funny but LOL.

        • HazooToo

          Really though, I am sorry.

    • I would like to add that your wonket review is equally as impressive.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Thank you.

    • Doug Langley

      Congrats! And I’m sure your raise was very hefty.

      Um . . . you DID get a raise . . . right?

      • WomanInThePersistence

        I’m now top of the wage scale.

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Next round is on WITP!!!!! Thanks!

        • Doug Langley

          Yay!

    • Anna Rompage

      That is super awesome and well deserved!

      Me on the other hand had to have the very uncomfortable talk with an underling about their extremely potent body odor… No body wants to have to tell another that they stink, and it is unacceptable…

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Ooooohhhhh, I’m sorry. I had to do that once. Not fun at all.

      • Doug Langley

        I once had a boss who had no problem at all with that. Do not ask me how I know.

      • i had to do that once (in theatre so a little less awkward because we’re generally awkward).

        i’ve heard some folks (not all) really can’t tell.

      • SadDemInTex

        Our former personnel manager had to do that with a colleague who was massively morbidly obese. (Actually he wrote a letter). He did it with great compassion and sensitivity.

        Then there was the letter that went out asking us to stop having social intercourse on stage in front of the audience. We had a lot of fun with that for awhile.

      • TundraGrifter

        That’s a tough conversation! Lack of laundry and dry cleaning?

    • BosGrl

      That is wonderful! Such a great feeling :)

      • WomanInThePersistence

        It really is. I always look forward to reviews like I look forward to dental surgeries.

    • The Wanderer

      (applauds)

    • Panika MCD

      it’s hard not to praise people who are made of awesome.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • WomanInThePersistence

        How on earth did you find that video of me?

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      You are good and you should feel good! You have my permission to treat yourself to something indulgent! Belly eub, perhaps? https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/60f187232efacdfa4849bae4c4371567bcddd23348ca9ceef2919c1916ed60a1.jpg

    • congratulations lady!

      what a lovely thing and thank you for sharing.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I’m so pleased for you.

    • Pisto75666

      Awww congrats!

    • TundraGrifter

      You’re good enough and you’re smart enough and doggone it, people like you!

  • KillerMartinis

    Today I was told that police never shoot anyone that’s not committed a crime, that anyone over 40 is already undergoing such senility that they can’t be trusted to make their own decisions, and that gentrification will solve racism.

    Oh, and someone argued against the concept of education.

    I didn’t realize it but it turns out the answer is 34. 34 is the age you start to wonder what the fuck is going on with the youth.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      College Sophomores?

      • weejee

        Today’s college sophomores are 34?

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Yes.

          • weejee

            I should sit down now, being over one and half times forty senile.

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          I was referring to some of the shit she heard.

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          13 mentally

    • jesterpunk
    • I was wondering that at 17…and these people sound like they have a Pryon disease. Do they eat people?

      • KillerMartinis

        you know, at this point it wouldn’t surprise me. It has been A Day as far as audience engagement.

        • That sounds like it should be A Day where the water bottle is full of coping juice

        • WomanInThePersistence

          Was this on your latest post?

          • KillerMartinis

            Elsewhere on the Interwebs, thank God, or I’d really have to reconsider chilling here

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Whew, I’m very sorry you to deal with that, and very relieved it wasn’t here.

          • KillerMartinis

            I was bound to become an Old eventually. Didn’t expect it would happen like magic one day in my mid-thirties but life is full of surprises

          • WomanInThePersistence

            FWIW, I do not consider you an old. Of course, I don’t consider myself an old either, and I’m 50.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            If you can’t tuck your tits into your bootstraps and you are still upright and curious you are not an old IMO.

          • It seems Elsewhere may need to add hazard pay

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Were these people like those typical guys with a beer gut and old wranglers, look like Wilford Brimley, and just talk and talk and talk like they know shit and condescend everything you say?

      • KillerMartinis

        They were sadly mostly Youths but I’m gonna imagine them all with the mustache now anyway

    • Panika MCD

      is this like the thing where we were all born with sin?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      There’s a lot of villages missing their idiots, apparently.

      • weejee

        Small town zoning laws. Sad.

    • mancityRed6

      43. I voted for Clinton because what the Republicans tired to do in the ’90s was beyond reproach. But I didn’t really start getting into politics until the ’00 election and that was all down to HST books (better than sex and generation of swine), but then, two years later, I had to adjust to a whole ‘nother set of politics and politicians. Sadly the lib dem leader (party I most agreed with) turned out to be an alcoholic. I liked him.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      My g-generation… funny how peeps all reconsider that whole “hope I die before I get old” thing once the time comes…

      • KillerMartinis

        In point of fact, the kid did tell us he planned to kill himself at the age of 39! I am sure he will follow through on this plan.

    • tomamitai

      Never trust anyone under thirty!

    • Jenny

      Wait these were youngs? It was the self proclaimed libertarians, right? They’re always the ones to pop off with self approved authority with things like “female orgasms are myth.”

    • I will not submit to those drunk on the wine of youth.

      • OutOfOrbit

        “Youth is wasted on the young.”
        –?

    • 30s and 40s are best for sex.

    • Moar Wordz

      Dear Killer Martinis,
      I apologize for my heat – wave induced, early menopause exacerbated snarky – as – hell comment to you on this thread. Have looked everywhere for my snark comment in order to delete, it’s not there, prob. turfed by the moderator.
      I enjoy your articles but definetely didn’t understand the urinal pics on one – ” Pissing contest ? ” lol

      • KillerMartinis

        It was a bluetooth-connected urinal.

  • weejee

    So when do they close the polls in Georgia for those who had not previously been closed from the polls?

    • HazooToo

      7, I think?

    • The Wanderer

      1900 Eastern

    • Panika MCD

      depends on how long the line is. HAVA and the VRA require them to let everyone who is in line at the closing time to vote. they generally put a poll worker at the end of the line to make sure no one else hops in. but we should get the EV numbers at 7–unless the GA SOS is afraid they’ll affect the vote of those in line still.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    anybody have a good source for returns this evening? I looked at ajc.com and NYtimes.com

  • msanthropesmr
  • The Wanderer

    (sighs happily) Leftover grilled boneless pork chop, cherry salsa, salad, and garlic mashed taters. Life is good.

  • Zippy W Pinhead
    • Rick Hill

      Stein…Nader…two sides of one bad coin I’ll always be looking to toss in the bottom of a deep well

      • weejee

        Both unsafe at any speed.

    • mancityRed6

      I don’t hate her. that takes a lot of energy, and I have a finite amount of energy.
      I just wish she’d go away. far away.

    • Raan

      I wasn’t, but now I’m over being happy about brinner. So thanks for that.

    • Doug Langley

      She seems nice.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      “There are differences between Clinton and Trump, no doubt, but they’re not different enough to save your life, to save your job, to save the planet,” [Stein] says.

      YES THEY ARE YOU FUCKING…

      SIgh.

    • god america so sucks.

  • Raan

    I’d do the traditional open thread thing and show you my dinner, but it’s gone already.

    It was breakfast. Bacon, home fries, scrambled eggs, and toast.

    • mancityRed6

      breakfast for dinner is the best dinner.

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Brinner.

    • miss_grundy

      That Ben Sasse doesn’t believe you should be allowed to have breakfast for dinner. Such a martinet!

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      maybe you should come to texas and re cook it so we can all see it (and eat it)
      ; )

    • Apple Scruff

      I had breakfast for dinner too! Omelette + turkey sausage. I did miss having a side potato, though :(

  • mancityRed6

    oh, good then.
    http://crooksandliars.com/2017/06/one-13-senators-drafting-health-care-bill
    “One Of The 13 Senators Drafting Health Care Bill Hasn’t Even Seen It”

    • Bill D. Burger

      It’s the ‘New Transparency’ in the Age of Drumpf.

      http://thehill.com/sites/default/files/blogs/tweet.trump_.jpg

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        What a fuckstick. I keep thinking I could not possibly despise him more – and then he tweets again. Or someone dredges up one of his Twitter “greatest hits.” Loathsome, greedy, greasy sack of shit.

      • miss_grundy

        I would send him a tweet telling him to shut the f*ck up but I don’t want the Secret Service to show up at my door….

        • tomamitai

          At this point do they even have the staff to check out everyone who tells Cheetolini to get fucked on Twitter? That’s got to be a full time job for at least a couple hundred guys!

    • miss_grundy

      How is that even possible? How can you draft a document without seeing it? Is he only writing a paragraph or two?

      • jesterpunk

        They have the paper in a box that only their hands can fit through with black sheets over it so no one can see inside of it.

        • BosGrl

          Also, they wrote it with lemon juice and they hid all the light bulbs.

      • mancityRed6

        I’m thinking his input was “fuck medicaid” and “fuck those with preexisting conditions” and then he was upset that he didn’t get to flesh it out more. it is Mike Lee, you know.

      • BosGrl

        Staffers are writing it, apparently. Staffers that nobody voted for have life and death in their hands.

      • cheetojeebus
    • I know a joke
      • mancityRed6

        he didn’t shove it in his mouth, he shoved it up his…ewww, it’s a good thing I’m not hungry anymore.

    • Like a blind man riding a lawnmower..

      • mancityRed6

        you forgot “drunk”

    • Bill D. Burger

      So secretive that one of their own crooked hit men hasn’t even seen it.

      “There is no honor among thieves.”

    • aktlib101

      Wait, did any of the Senators see it? I thought they would get the final draft later this week directly from the Insurance companies. No?

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Also note that both Senators from Wyoming and Utah are on this 13-man “working group”. Because we need all those cows represented.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      I guess they decided it should be written by the people most affected by the new law. So they got the ten guys who get the biggest tax cuts.

  • Panika MCD

    do I have time for a potty break before the EV numbers drop?

  • La forza del resistino

    Good luck Mr, Ossoff, the GOP has thrown everything at you in Atlanta short of saying you’re the great great grandson of Gen’l Wm Tecumseh Sherman.

  • Doug Langley

    Didn’t have to go to summer camp till afternoon, so called up a recruiter who got me an interview 2 months back. Client said “He’s very experienced”, but suddenly changed their minds and would get back mid-June. So I asked what’s the story. Well. They changed their approach, figure their present team is good enough, so opening is . . . bye bye. They do have a new position open, but no way I’m qualified.

    Then recruiter said “good news, another company needs someone with your skill set. It’s —— —–.” I said “But another place submitted me there 3 months ago and nothing came of it! You mean they STILL haven’t filled it????” Silence. Then “um, well this is the first we heard of it.”

    Off to the summer camp to earn a few more breadcrumbs.

  • GreenGoldSharpie

    Soooo, legal name change done, and I got to the DMV and my bank on top of it. SS was a two hour wait so I opted to wait until early tomorrow. :-)

    Here is me in court bein’ cute.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5bb7bddd1c96f351c654e22b29f19b93e227b12d4336c1a6d4590c6d6b6a5845.jpg

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      Yay!!

    • HazooToo

      Awwww, I love your glasses!

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Thanks. :-D I call them my “teacher glasses.”

    • BosGrl

      You are SO cute!! And congrats :)

    • WomanInThePersistence

      You are really cute! And congratulations again!

    • OutOfOrbit

      Yes you are. (Looking cute.)

    • janecita

      Yay! Congratulations!!! Did you wear you cute, new shoes?

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Of course, and they didn’t hurt after four hours. :-)

        • janecita

          That’s awesome, they did look comfy though!
          I have similar glasses, are they Ray Ban?

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            They’re…. from All About Eyes? Haha, I don’t know the brand. My old pair finally gave out last fall so I opted for something I could transition with. Brand didn’t matter.

          • janecita

            My insurance covers a pair of (cheaper) glasses a year. This year I splurged and paid the extra $50.00 to get a nice pair. I’m always really cheap with glasses, I only wear them at night time.

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            That makes a lot of sense, actually.

            My last pair lasted six years, and I am blind as hell without them. Heh.

          • janecita

            I’m blind also! Thank God for contacts!

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            Can’t touch my eyes. >.<

            Makes being a horror buff bad. Some people like to do eye stuff.

    • GreenGoldSharpie

      Aw, you all are the best. :-D

    • MynameisBlarney

      Thems some swanky ass glasses ya got there.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Cute AND happy! Great combo! Congrats!

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Yay! You is all official and proper now!

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        Almost. :-D Gotta get that rascal gender marker on my birth certificate. Hopefully the puke at the head of our state ill help out, but I’ll have by by 2018 regardless.

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          My housemate just got his passport with the corrected gender! His home state still won’t change his bc, though.

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            Illinois has a pending bill to allow it to be changed with only a letter from a doctor, which I had for my DL.

            Not sure if Rauner is going to sign it, but planning an orchi this year, and that will also qualify.

    • janecita

      Btw, you have the perfect face shape, for that cool ass haircut:-)

      • GreenGoldSharpie

        It’s more a “I was flop sweating and nervous” Haha. I tried to clean it up again before the pic, and did a semi-competent job.

        It needs to be longer, though. :-D

        • janecita

          Oh no, it looks really pretty that length!

          • GreenGoldSharpie

            Nooooooo. I’m going to get it cut into a modern shag this August.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            That settles it, I’m coming to you for fashion advice. I’m very bad at all things fashionable (adjusts overalls with only one strap buttoned, ties laces on old Doc Martens)

    • BadKitty904
    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      Look and learn, Rick Perry: you have to be smart and cute BEFORE the glasses will help.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      I was thinking about you today and your new name. Congrats all over the place!

    • shastakoala

      Congratulations! You are lovely!

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Congrats, Honey! ~hugs~ I’m so happy for you, and you look great! :D

    • CindyinEncinitas

      So sweet! So demure! Go get ’em, girl!

    • MCA

      Do you

      • MCA

        Compliment nothing more. I mean be who you are

    • Ilgattomorte

      Congratulations! This is why I will never understand those who cannot accept Gay, Trans, or in fact, anybody who’s different. The crap you have to go through just to find something as basic as being comfortable with yourself, or finding some level of peace, is the kind of stuff that would bury those of us who were lucky enough to be born in our current skin. We would be paralyzed.

      You have to respect that, and you have to respect the person. So again, much luck and congratulations.

  • Picabo

    Live updates: Georgia’s 6th District special election in the spotlight
    http://politics.blog.ajc.com/2017/06/20/live-updates-all-eyes-on-georgias-6th-district-special-election/

  • weejee

    Will it be Georgia blues?

  • jesterpunk

    Voting has been extended by 30 minutes in some districts tonight.

    http://politics.blog.ajc.com/2017/06/20/live-updates-all-eyes-on-georgias-6th-district-special-election/

    North DeKalb accounts for the most Democratic-leaning
    part of the district. It’s where Democrat Jon Ossoff grew up, and it’s
    also where he’ll be looking to rack up votes. Voting at two precincts
    there has been extended by 30 minutes after officials reported slow check-ins this morning.

  • Apple Scruff

    Wonder if the flash floods in GA today kept anyone away, cause Ossoff is expected to take the early vote by %%%%%

  • II Gosala

    Hey! I liked Scooter.

    He was the sane one that made the insanity around him more insanely insane.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Watching Unearthed episode on Angkor Wat. I’ve already seen tonight’s movie before. Early lead for D due to early voting. R takes over and wins when the red parts come in later.

    • Panika MCD

      the parts of the district they’re allowing to stay open for an extra 30 minutes are in DeKalb which is heavily for Ossoff.

    • Raan

      Why you gotta bring me down like that after brinner?

      • Panika MCD

        so you can party like it’s 1999 later?

        • Raan

          You know what? Fair point. Last two American elections I went into hopeful got us Cheeto Benito and that prick who bodyslams reporters.

          • Everrett Fanuelli

            If elections have taught us anything it’s to never count on the American people to not make the absolutely most terrible decision.

  • aktlib101

    And now, this: China invites Ivanka Trump, Jared Kushner to visit: US official
    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/06/china-invites-ivanka-trump-jared-kushner-to-visit-us-official/
    “The government of China has invited U.S. President Donald Trump’s daughter, Ivanka Trump, and his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, to visit Beijing later this year, a White House official said on Tuesday.

    China’s overture appeared aimed at deepening engagement with the influential young couple, who played a role in the first summit between Trump and Chinese President Xi Jinping in April, which set an improved tone for relations between the world’s two biggest economies.”
    *barf*

    • OutOfOrbit

      Pass the bucket over here plz.

    • Jamoche

      “influential”

      Assumes facts not in evidence.

      • miss_grundy

        Someone will be handing them bags of money……

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos
      • BosGrl

        Well, they tried! Waste of a good chocolate cake, though.

      • therblig

        china succeeded. they nodded and smiled and said, “sure, we’ll help you mr. president”, then they flew back home laughing all the way at what a dimwitted asshole you are.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      “Xi! Invite those other Trumps over! It was so easy to fool the big one, maybe we can get more from these two!”

  • La forza del resistino

    If losing b/c of his mailing address, why didn’t Ossoff rent a 1 bedroom unit and at least move a toothbrush in and have his Natl Geographic subscription forwarded.

    • jesterpunk

      It works for R-Money.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Rick Santorum got over a million dollars in distance learning subsidies for his kids with a one-bedroom in his district he rented to transients when his real home was a McMansion in VA.

        • BosGrl

          Those fuckers don’t miss a trick, do they?

          • tomamitai

            And they rarely ever treat!

        • jesterpunk

          Yeah but R-money voted saying he lived his kids unfinished basement.

          • tomamitai

            Didn’t Bannon register at his ex-wife’s place?

          • jesterpunk

            Ayup, he was one of those illegally registered voters the White House was complaining about. Along with Spicey, Just Jared and everyone else there.

        • tomamitai

          I think I saw a bit on the news with the neighbors complaining he didn’t even cut the grass.

    • Shanzgood 17 Days
  • Bill D. Burger

    Just love him….and it does reference Georgia!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIJabiKOtCU

  • Zippy W Pinhead
    • Early this morning

    • MynameisBlarney

      I need that for my non-comments here sometimes.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        i think I can speak for most of us…

        YUP

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Me too. “I am a priest…” WTF was I blathering on about?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Heard back from him today.

    • BadKitty904

      I thought he was on just a tad ago…

  • jesterpunk
    • Carpe Vagenda

      +1

    • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

      The iPod decided to play Ray’s “Gold Collection”. Damn that man could deliver!

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “I searched the Very Famous White House carefully. There are no longer any tapes of me speaking with Nutty Comey.” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • Thiazin Red

    I finally got around to watching John Wick 2. It was a rough week for John Wick. And did the bad guy not hear about the events of the first movie? How did it happen that he thought to himself, “You know what would be an awesome idea? Fucking over John Wick. I see no way that this will turn out poorly for me.”

    • timpundit

      Rough week? You should see what happened to the poor fools who gave Jane Doe an autopsy.

    • did you like it? the ending annoyed me – seemed out of character for him and blatant set up for 3.

  • Panika MCD

    before I take Calliope Jane to her play group, I thought I would show you some food that I et on Day 19 of KFF. one of the staff coordinators and I decided to eat in Kerrville before carpooling back and we went to the generically named China Town because I had remembered their sushi being decent. their sushi is not decent. their sushi is FUCKING FANTASTIC. many mouthgasms were had. many tummygasms were had. we even saved some for the nice lady watching my pets to see if it was just that we hadn’t had anything without caliche dust in it for 18 days, but we did not get to do that. anyway, we ordered 5 rolls for shits and giggles. this is how they brought it to us:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5efc608be21fe32bb0531f425e2af53b079ccc7c442b7838db9bf887738df7fe.jpg

    and we were informed that there is a bigger boat with a mofo sail on it and we will be definitely getting that next time!

    • If you’re ever in the New Haven CT area, go get a boat at Jerry-San’s (Daiko, but everyone just calls it Jerry-San’s.) I’ll try to find a pic of the last one we got.

      • Panika MCD

        I’m sure it’s good, but I would expect somewhere near a coast–especially in New England–to have good sushi. this was in Bumfuck, Red State–and in the middle of the state no less.

        • Wow!

        • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

          I wouldn’t think of Kerrville as Bumfuck, exactly, but you’re right, it’s nowhere near any coast.

          • Panika MCD

            compared to our cities and their stubborn habit of being liberal havens (and havens for 74-80% of the state’s population)?

    • mancityRed6

      the last time I was in London, the ex and I agreed that we would eat something that we hadn’t eaten before. we ate at a yo sushi conveyor belt restaurant. it was good, even at $60-80 bucks.

    • La forza del resistino

      Looks tasty. I’d post a pic of my bowl of ramen, but that would depress me even more.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Good sushi. In Kerrville? Kerrville?
      My favorite out there when I visit is the Camel Cafe in Camp Verde. Will have to check this place out.

  • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

    Yellowstone: Next week or the 4th of July?

    • mancityRed6

      travelling or when the super volcano will erupt?

      • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

        Sorry, Traveling.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          I generally try to avoid national parks on holidays. Because it can be madness.

          • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

            I prefer the backcountry at Yellowstone, all people disappear 100 feet from the road. Then it’s clothing optional time!

          • WomanInThePersistence

            I would definately recommend avoiding the 4th then. Between the little kids running around, the drunks, and the teenagers looking for a place away from their parents, the chances of you encountering unexpected people goes way the hell up.

        • mancityRed6

          don’t even get in the car on a four day weekend. buy all your needs that Friday, like it’s getting ready to hurricane or blizzard.

        • SkinlessGenderlessMan

          We will be there 7/6-11 – when will you be visiting?

      • OutOfOrbit

        “erupt”? don’t you mean BLOW UP!!!!!

      • Bill D. Burger

        So………..much………..awesomeness!

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzk1uqxpfoY

    • jesterpunk
      • TundraGrifter

        Funny…that’s also the name of a local motel.

    • Doug Langley
      • tomamitai

        MAGAma? Oh oh….

        • CindyinEncinitas

          You got magma in my smegma!

    • SkinlessGenderlessMan

      Hope it’s not before July 13th – we will be out of there by then…

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Oh, open thread.

    I finally watched the last episode of season 1 of American Gods, and probably most of what I have to say about it is blatant spoilers, but there was a resurrection-themed soiree, and they served linzer tortes

    these: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7adfe890db88c4c4ab2358296591647b277792dc372ddbba0d8b804f11877f85.jpg

    only, hand-shaped with jam in the palm, so they were stigmata cookies.

    I am really enjoying that show.

    • Thiazin Red

      I’m really liking it, and I’m looking forward to next season. So far, I’ve liked the changes from the source material, the best being taking Laura from non-entity to rounded character with her own story. The casting has been great and I love the attention to detail.

      Fuller’s shows are all so lush that it looking fantastic is hardly surprising.

    • janecita

      I enjoyed that last episode way too much! I so want to be invited to that party!

    • Finnabar87

      It’s in my queue, as the kids say.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        In some ways, and I’m one of those people who gets pissy about Jane Austen inerrancy, it’s better than the source material.

    • timpundit

      Needs moar Jezuzzes

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω
    • MynameisBlarney

      I just vegged out on season 5 of Agents of Shield.
      So many references to “fake news” and subtle jabs at MAGA, and not so subtle jabs at fascism and racism.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Oh, I’m glad it works for you, but I’m not on board Daisy and her unearned immanence?

        • MynameisBlarney

          I don’t think Daisy is either.

    • jowgajen
      • Carpe Vagenda

        Thank you that’s exactly it! I mean, it’s totally wrong, but it was clever.

    • we’re watching in about 45 minutes. can’t wait!

    • tomamitai

      What were those hockey puck shaped cakes with what looks like a hard icing all over? Macaroons, or maybe macarons?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Macarons. Eggwhite cookies with icing in between.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Hey Dok, maybe put this in the post, so it doesn’t get lost downthread?

    https://www.nytimes.com/elections/results/georgia-congressional-runoff-ossoff-handel

  • MynameisBlarney

    Ok…so a woman that works for THE local radio station came by the shop today.
    They have a 4th o’ July promo goin’ on.
    For 125 clams (not canned you monsters!) we can get our company name on the sponsors list for “patriotic music” to be played on the 4th before the big fireworks thingy.
    The ads would start next week. playing 5 times a day.

    While it may be good for business, I’m not sure I want to participate, because it’s gonna be a total turmp love-fest I’m betting.
    It’s a country station.
    Not sure I want our company to be associated with that shit.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      For 125 bucks you can get Lee Greenwood to sing at your house then refund 100 of your money back to you.

      • mancityRed6

        yeah but his rider is full of shit
        two methed up hookers
        6 pack of amyl nitrate
        12 pack of natty lite.

        • Raan

          The amyls are for his heart. The natty is because I don’t know what you would use it for.

          • mancityRed6

            trust me, those methed out hookers get thirsty when they take their teeth out.

          • mancityRed6

            yeah, and the ether is because he’s got bandages on his legs…

          • Raan

            And the rest of it is for an exhibit for the DA’s Conference on Dangerous Drugs.

          • Résistance Land Shark Ω

            Use the natty to lube the transmission?

          • Raan

            No, but you’ve pushed me in the right direction.

            Antifreeze.

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        Hell, I’ll do it for a six-pack of moderately-priced domestic beer.

        • BoatOfVelociraptors

          Have I got a song for both of you!
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxP442T-aZ0

          • Vecchioivan

            Why you dirty goddam sack o’ crap . . . !!!!

            https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AvWyM3Z67F8

          • Persistent Demme

            Ha, ha, ha!
            And…uh…FUCK TEXAS!!!!

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            we actually didn’t pledge allegiance to Texas when I was in school, but it’s been awhile.

          • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

            Wow. Rage-gasm much?

        • Vecchioivan

          Oh yeah, like you wouldn’t.

      • therblig

        how much for him to stay far away?

    • Raan

      I just realized that you were talking about money. I pictured someone showing up with a bushel of freshly dug clams.

    • weejee

      Well with the proper patriotic song.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      You should flat out tell them that. If enough businesses did, it might alter their plans.

      • MynameisBlarney

        I doubt it would change their plans.
        This is clearly a cash grab.

      • MynameisBlarney

        Besides, we’re already advertising on the new station in town.
        And they’re a better mix of music IMHO, even though it’s not exactly my kind of music.

    • georgiaburning

      This looks a little suspicious, like they’ll publish a list of businesses that chose NOT to participate and suggest that “patriots” take unspecified action

      • MynameisBlarney

        HA!
        Maybe.
        I already told her this was our slow season.

  • BoatOfVelociraptors

    Man, remember when Teabaggers had a 1,990 page bill to rip apart on the capitol steps?
    https://wonkette.com/412025/teabaggers-will-attempt-to-rip-apart-1990-page-bill

    We get nothin!

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Anyone else notice trump’s new lawyer looks like Monty Burn’s lawyer? https://goo.gl/images/pWpDU1

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    7:23pm on the right coast …. polls close at 7:30pm in GA-06?

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      2 polls in DeKalb County get to stay open till 7:30.

  • I know a joke

    This whole thread is well worth reading:

    https://twitter.com/AnotherSlyfox/status/877148265040551936

  • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

    Turtle stuffs AHCA in mouth as Democrat walks past!

    https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/877210195746840576

    • weejee

      I thought the AHCA was a suppository.

      • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

        It is. Mitch panicked.

        • mancityRed6

          a hole is a hole if the owner is a complete ass.

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        Wishful thinking!

    • Maclare🍩

      Nightmare Fuel!

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    Know your conspiracy theory, we’ll likely be hearing about this soon. So, how many things are wrong with this:

    “serial killer is likely behind the murder of Democratic National Committee (DNC) staffer Seth Rich, according to forensic psychology students and instructors who spent three months investigating the homicide. Those researchers, who volunteer at The Profiling Project, an independent group, published their findings on Tuesday in an 83-page report.

    The Profiling Project, based in Arlington, Virginia, consists of around 20 volunteers who are current and former George Washington University forensic psychology graduate students and instructors. The report states that Rich’s July 2016 “death does not appear to be a random homicide” or “a robbery gone bad,” as police had suggested. Instead, the report says, the “death was more likely committed by a hired killer or serial murderer,” and that the killer is likely still at large.

    “The person folks [should be] looking for and considering isn’t a robber who kills, but really is a killer, and maybe a killer that doesn’t rob,” says Kevin Doherty, a recent George Washington University graduate and one of the volunteers with The Profiling Project. “The fact that this person has gotten away with it shows a level of proficiency.”

    Related: Seth Rich’s family calls Kim Dotcom claims “ridiculous”

    The Profiling Project did not provide the family with a copy of the report or consult with the family while preparing the report, Brad Bauman, a spokesman for the Rich family, says in a statement. He points out that The Profiling Project states in its methology that it “was given no special access to any materials, evidence or persons, and due to case sensitivity, conducted only informal, limited interviews.””

    • TundraGrifter

      Criminal profiling is right up there with phrenology when it comes to being based in science.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        yup, that’s one (big) thing wrong with this.

        • TundraGrifter

          Malcolm Gladwell wrote a New Yorker article about it and just blew the whole thing right out of the water. What a crock.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            He compared it to psychic cold-reading techniques, iirc.

    • mancityRed6

      technically, it could be true. serial killers get caught because they target the same types of people or kill in the same way. if you do everything random, they can’t tie it back to one suspect.
      but it was a gun, so…I have trouble believing this.

      • BosGrl

        There are people in Boston who think there’s a serial killer of young men:
        https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/04/03/seaches-missing-persons-cases-often-look-waterways/mH2cV5cLtaAW6sqTiNZK9K/story.html
        I don’t believe in conspiracy theories but I wonder about this.

        • mancityRed6

          there was a case in KC of women going missing, it led to 55 gallon barrels on a farm.
          it could be.
          *edited because my original phrasing was in poor taste*

      • Raan

        There was a quote during the Indigo Prophecy playthrough from a constable that went something like “when we get to the point in a society where where murders are committed against strangers by other strangers, we have broken down as a society.”

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Oh, I saw that. There were entire areas of their casus belli they forgot to fill in.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        i just finished reading it (i got distracted).
        “The Profiling Project is funded by GOP lobbyist Jack Burkman, who last September announced he was offering a $100,000 reward for information into Rich’s death. “I’m not here to expound on anything even remotely conspiratorial,” he told Newsweek at the time. “The objective here really is just to get closure for this family. This is a young kid in our profession. This could have happened to any of the young people who work for me.”

        • tomamitai

          Glad to see someone’s taken up the mantle of tin foil sugar daddy since Richard Mellon Scaife died.

    • tomamitai

      “The fact that this person has gotten away with it shows a level of proficiency.” https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6e128127a82a57f86a633ea294ee77d5266bc56c16a9be4d4b4d12116f2d40f0.jpg

  • Joe Beese
    • jowgajen

      Frugal man.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Donnie had a cash bar on election night, IIRC.

      • jesterpunk

        Donnie doesnt drink but somehow sold vodka and wine.

        • epazote

          Drumpf Vodka ?
          Drumpf wine?
          of course…$$$ straight into his wallet

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      and where exactly did all Handel’s money come from?

      • weejee

        Messiah copyright payments?

      • Russia?

      • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

        A revival tent service?

    • miss_grundy

      In other words, Ossoff didn’t throw away the donations he received by living like a fat cat. And Republicans are hypocrites.

    • not_vh

      per logic, what about trump’s victory party?

      • mancityRed6

        *crickets*

    • Yr. Gma

      Isn’t this capitalism at work? Do they think Jon is some kind of socialist?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Wow.

    • not_vh

      i want to see paul ryan work the iron and bryce work on legislation.

      • Yr. Gma

        That was great! “Let’s trade places.”

      • Shanzgood 17 Days

        Paul Ryan only knows how to do jobs where he works on his knees.

        • Sister Suffragette

          Not fair! He also knows how to wash pots that are already clean.

      • Doug Langley

        The only iron Paulie works is 20 lb dumbbells.

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          Mitch McConnell?

    • weejee

      Very good. I have a nephew in his 30s & he has MS. Will the VA keep sending me my $$$ chemo pillz because of Agent Orange? There are millions who are going to be hurt by this.

      • mancityRed6

        there are a few more colors in the agent spectrum they should be checking for if you were on the ground, pink is one.

        • weejee

          Very much on the ground.

          • mancityRed6

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainbow_Herbicides
            the ex’s dad has a lot of problems from orange, but they just started in with the pink a year or so ago. push them and push them hard, nicely, but still.

          • weejee

            Thanks.

          • mancityRed6

            my dad was offshore, but he was a gunner’s mate on a destroyer. he now gets free hearing aid batteries. it’s takes effort, but it’s worth it. fight.

    • boyblue123
      • Everrett Fanuelli

        Paul Ryan will win because of his skillz with the pancakes. That and because voters are stupid.

    • Randy Bryce has my vote.

    • Doug Langley

      Now that’s what a professional video crew can do.

    • mancityRed6

      donkey jacket at 1:36, I’ve never seen one outside of the UK
      also, run baby run. make Paul sweat.
      at least this guy has a reason to fight.

    • Vincent Ricola

      This was fantastic. Team American hero and not that douche Paul Ryan.

    • Ωbjectifier

      Yeah, well what’s his marathon time?

    • Sister Suffragette

      Awesome. Where do I send the check?

  • btwbfdimho
  • Bananas Foster
  • doktorzoom

    So two precincts that were allowed to stay open an extra 30 because of setup problems (hacked computers I bet!!!!) just closed, and we should start getting results soon. Gives me time to go grab a food and hurry back for the par-tay.

  • House0fTheBlueLights
    • Three Finger Salute

      Link goes to “Page not found”.

      400-pound Russian hookers sitting on Karen’s bed?

      • Jamoche

        The closing ) got attached to the URL.

        • Three Finger Salute

          I copied and edited it. It’s not looking good for Jon right now (the bitch is 3 points ahead and it’s only 15 minutes past closing time), but I hope the polls (which give Handel a slight edge) are wrong this time around.

      • doktorzoom

        I used moderator magic to fix it. Probably shouldn’t mess around with posts like that, huh?

  • jesterpunk
    • Joe Beese

      I always preferred Gladys to Aretha.

      • jesterpunk

        Same here.

      • Vecchioivan
        • Joe Beese

          I’m sorry to hear that. But Aretha’s performances always say to me, “Behold my magnificence”, while Gladys’s say “Feel my emotions”. And the latter is what I think soul singing should be about.

          • Vecchioivan

            Gladys is a goddess.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    So Brad the White House intern has an update. Yes, this is actually white House spam.

    “President Donald J. Trump is embracing big change, bold thinking, and outsider perspectives to transform government and make it work better, and at a far less cost. This new spirit of innovation will make life better for all Americans by modernizing critical IT systems, making government more transparent, and saving the taxpayers up to $1 trillion dollars over the next 10 years.

    Today’s Events

    10:30 AM: Vice President Pence participates in a bilateral meeting with President Petro Poroshenko of Ukraine

    11:00 AM: President Trump meets with National Security Advisor H.R. McMaster with a drop-in by Vice President Mike Pence and President Petro Poroshenko of Ukraine

    11:45 AM: Vice President Pence delivers remarks at the National Association of Manufacturers (NAM) 2017 Manufacturing Summit

    12:30 PM: President Trump has a Legislative Affairs lunch

    12:45 PM: Vice President Pence participates in the Senate Republican Policy Lunch

    2:00 PM: Vice President Pence participates in a series of meetings with lawmakers

    7:00 PM: President Trump and First Lady Melania Trump have dinner with Vice President Pence and Mrs. Karen Pence”

    Donald apparently needed a rather long nap in the afternoon. Screaming at tv sets must be exhausting.

    • jesterpunk

      So they are saying Trump is low energy? SAD!!!!!

    • BosGrl

      Eat, sleep, rant, repeat.

    • mancityRed6

      in the late ’90s there was a small branch tasked with keeping the government computers up to date. then they claimed they needed a shit tonne of money to do so, so they were disbanded.
      yeah, kind of like how Obama wanted to modernize the electrical grid and look how far that went?

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      $100 billion per year saved. Good luck with that …

  • Vecchioivan

    I’m sleepy. Have we won yet?

  • Msgr_MΩment
    • Vecchioivan

      You hadn’t otter shown that.

    • Apple Scruff

      I saw this earlier today! DEAD.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      it’s the song that makes it.

    • Bananas Foster

      With different music, the first half of that video would be a great ad for tongue scrapers.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Watched it twice and going for a third.

    • janecita

      That otter has more rhythm than 95% of the women in my Zumba class.

    • mancityRed6

      aww comeon, I do this outside a restaurant or bar and I get arrested.
      double damn standards.

    • Persistent Demme

      Still laughing!
      Damn, I love the Wonkettes!

    • doktorzoom
      • Msgr_MΩment

        Butch and Otter libel!

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      Hilarious!

  • janecita

    I watched “Charade,” a Cary Grant and Audrey Hepburn movie. Regina (Hepburn) is getting a divorce, and she confides on her friend, Sylvie. Her friend looks at beautiful, thin Regina and says, “It is infuriating that your unhappiness does not turn to fat!”
    I just loved that quote, it has absolutely nothing to do with Georgia, but I’m trying not to stress.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Directed by the great Stanley Donen if I recall

    • Yr. Gma

      Love the song from that movie.

    • Bananas Foster

      That’s such a fabulous movie. The open casket scene alone kills me.

      • janecita

        I loved that scene!

    • Skeptical_thinker

      A movie that never needed to be remade.

      • janecita

        I didn’t know that there was a remake. Who is in it?

    • Rachel Book Harlot

      Oh my God, Janecita! What a weird a coincidence because I watched this film for the very first time this past Sunday! I loved it! Such great dialogue. My favorite scene was when she was cleaning his wound. Favorite lines from that scene: 1) “I just came in for an estimate.” and 2) after he tells her to cut it out: Him: “What are you doing?” Her: “I’m cutting it out.” Him: “I wasn’t through complaining yet.”

      Love that so much. I was actually still chuckling over those lines yesterday. :)

      • janecita

        That was an awesome scene! It was also my first time watching it:-)

    • mancityRed6

      there’s a cartoon on adult swim called China, IL, or was on it…not sure if it’s still around.
      the third episode of season 3 has a bit of a song by a character named (nicknamed) Pony, goes a little something like this…
      Pony: ♪You grow a little belly♪
      ♪When you go through some shit,♪
      ♪Go through some shit,♪
      ♪Go through some shit.♪
      ♪You grow a little belly♪
      ♪When you go through some shit,♪
      ♪But the homies just♪
      ♪Say you thick.♪

    • Carpe Vagenda

      That’s a wonderful movie. And the best part is that you can always watch it on Archive.Org because they screwed up the copyright.

      • janecita

        It went into public domain as soon as it was released:-)

        • Carpe Vagenda

          and it’s a totally delightful movie, and has launched a million fanfictions. But seriously, those lawyers have probably spent the time in between pretending desperately they weren’t involved.

    • Manders

      I looooove that movie.

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance
    • Three Finger Salute

      I’m guessing there are also articles in that issue about the stunning revelation that Jorge Bergoglio is a communicant of the Catholic Church and the breakthrough scientific discovery that dihydrogen monoxide has properties of wetness. Jury might be out on whether ursine mammals are known to defecate in wooded areas. Find out in next month’s installment!

    • mancityRed6

      and water is wet. seriously, even I can lie better than him for half his wage.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Okey dokey.

    Did anyone else see an article this morning in Politico about Jill Stein and how unrepentant she is and how the head of the MI Green party no shit giggles about how awesome it is that Trump heightened the contradictions?

    Well, turns out that the lady with the Richard Widmark issues is not the head of the MI Green party, she’s a failed candidate for the State Board of Education. Which should tell you something about who is promoting this narrative.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      “If ever there was someone who has given years of volunteer service to countless organizations to help make Michigan and the world in general a better place, that person would have to be Sherry A Wells. (I would list her various involvements here, but you might think I was exaggerating .)”

      For fuck’s sake, a cheap copywriter on Fiverr could do better than this.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Imma just say that countless is a big hill to climb when you’re supposed to be numerate.

  • Three Finger Salute

    Handel is up by about 3 points with less than one percent of districts reporting. When should I start getting nervous?

    • Yr. Gma

      I’m gonna come back later for the results. I can’t handle all the drama.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I can’t follow this shit live. Once every two years is all my system can handle.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Once every Olympiad for me, and even then I don’t stay up and watch into the wee hours. I do vote in the midterms, but don’t usually stick around for the results. I actually vomited on November 9th.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Keep drinking until the numbers start to look better.

    • OutOfOrbit

      Take a pill & chill–it’s gonna be a long night.

    • La forza del resistino

      if you’ve followed the NFL or the Civil War, Atlanta is not a place for optimism.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        So you’re saying Belichick is going to steal it?

        • La forza del resistino

          Tom Tecumseh Brady will burn the place down.

    • Bill D. Burger

      Some solace in the fact those early returns are from her own home area in the district.

    • Bananas Foster

      Sometime last November.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      It’s from where she lives.
      Have another joint.

  • Duke

    It’s the solstice.

    Going for a nice walk to see the sun set.

    Then sacrifice some goats and chickens and stuff.

    I’m a liberal, after all.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      What about the nekkid virgins? I always thought the solstice had nekkid virgins …

      • Duke

        Shhhh….

      • OutOfOrbit

        “Nekkid virgins”? Is that a alchohol-frree dd-d-dringk likhich a Surely Tempeel?

    • weejee

      As long as its not pigs.

  • Maclare🍩

    Everyone placed their bets?

    THEN COUNT IT UP!!!!

    Also, they were still showing attack ads on the teevee box as of 6:45! If you didn’t make up your mind at that point May dog have mercy on your soul!

    • Predisenting Ron

      Up Here that is most illegal, and you catch hell if you try running any sort of ad on election day. You’re not even supposed to have your signs up. (People forgetting to pick up their signs was my main source for the corrugated plastic I used to make floors for the ratties’ cages. Doin’ my civic duty, that was.)

      • Maclare🍩

        A fine use for them!

        • Predisenting Ron

          I always found it singularly appropriate. Especially Conservatives, who are second-most-likely to leave their signs up (after the Green Party, for some reason.)

  • KillerMartinis

    One of my bosses is punditing on CNN and I am torn because: watching CNN coverage, but also Avlon’s guaranteed to have at least three lines that make it worth it.

    • You are the boss of you KM, you know that and I know that.

      • KillerMartinis

        sadly I cannot pay me, or if I did it wouldn’t help.

        • No matter, you’re still the boss of you.

          I made the grave mistake at a tender age to tatoo the Chinese symbol for money on my Achilles heal……im not superstitious but I don’t advocate it to others.

  • HazooToo
  • weejee

    Off to the bazebawl game to eat peanuts, curse tRump, and maybe find beer.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      I hope your team scores the most wickets!

    • OutOfOrbit

      Don’t forget your Velvatine!

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance

    http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/wayne-allyn-root-says-jon-ossoff-like-all-documentarians-is-a-filthy-pot-smoking-marxist “This is exactly the way I behaved back in the day when I was a documentary film maker!” – Ken Burns

    • BosGrl

      So all documentary filmmakers are Maynard G. Krebs?

    • TJ Barke

      So?

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    All I gots to say is thank god for episodes of MST3K on the youtubes.

    • The Wanderer

      Turn Down Your Lights
      (where applicable)

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Keep circulating the tapes!

    • Kateaux

      At this very moment, I have episode 316 (“Gamera vs. Zigra”) playing on another tab in my browser.

    • Raan

      I’m watching Untamed Youth right now!

  • Joe Beese

    RedState has (y)our number!

    … it seems to me [GA-6] will have an everlasting effect on how everyone deals and feels about the Democrat party, specifically the Progressive wing.

    Because in this election, Dems are throwing every single trick in their playbook out there hoping one works. From outside money flowing in from coastal elites in California and New York, to the manufacturing of a recent-unknown into a viable candidate, to the framing of said candidate as a moderate with maybe even conservative leanings (I’m not joined by many on this, but I think Ossoff is nothing if not a hard-core, all the way to the left progressive).

    Dems are desperate for this win and it shows. And I think that’s what tonight’s election is really a referendum on: the losing policies of the Democrat party.

    • BosGrl

      Coastal elites! I have that on my bingo card.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        This time it’s California AND New York!

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Holla!

      • jesterpunk

        He was just missing George Soros.

      • Joe Beese

        Shmannity cranked his (poor) Thurston Howell III accent to 11 the other day, “satirizing” those STUCK-UP LIBERAL SNOBS who like Shakespeare.

        You could smell his inferiority complex, even over the radio.

        • Three Finger Salute

          Wasn’t there some other arch conservative guy a while back who hated artists and intellectuals (especially those who criticized the ruling class) but adored homegrown volk — er, folk culture?

      • La forza del resistino

        I’m still waiting for James to have the Rolls limo pulled around myself.

        • BosGrl

          As one does.

          • La forza del resistino

            It’s ok. Need some extra time to clean the caviar off of my spats.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Yeah Dems. Don’t be so desperate for a win. Let this one go.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Well ratfucking over governing does seem to be mighty popular these days.

    • Vecchioivan

      Gee, thanks for the advice, mister!

    • HazooToo

      It’s really actually all of the rest of us wondering if we’re fucked for the foreseeable future, or if there is any shame left in people in red states. If we lose, but it’s close, then the GOP needs to be very afraid. Not that it will be any comfort in the meantime.

      • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

        I’ve decided to assume he will lose. I can’t take the dashed expectations any more and being delightfully surprised would be fun if it happens. I don’t expect it to happen. Maybe it will happen. It won’t happen.

        • TJ Barke

          Welcome to pessimism, because misery loves company.

        • HazooToo

          Yes I feel the same. I have prayed for them to swing left. I expect them to swing right. But I also expect it to be close. And they should understand what that means, even while they run around crowing and slapping their dicks in people’s faces.

    • boyblue123

      Know who else is a coastal elite from NYC

      • Wild Cat

        Moi!

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Hitler?

      • CindyinEncinitas

        The very pale people swimming in the ocean right now without wetsuits?

    • TJ Barke

      “Ossoff is nothing if not a hard-core, all the way to the left progressive”
      HAHAHAHAHAHA!

    • Shanzgood 17 Days

      They need to quit being so desperate for a win that they’re willing to throw reproductive rights under the bus.

    • Bemused

      I am a fucking United States Citizen. I count just as much as any bloody person in Nebraska or Iowa or Georgia. I’m tired of hearing about “Coastal Elites” like we don’t work as hard or as long as any other person in the entire US. We are not, somehow, less attached to our country than some random Texan from Dallas.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Not to mention, not everyone on the coasts is an “elite.” There’s more in Massachusetts than Cambridge and Martha’s Vineyard; more in California than Hollywood and Silicon Valley, and more in New York than Fifth Avenue and, well, Trump Tower. Not everyone in blue states is a nouveau-riche suburbanite with a pair of SUVs in a two-car garage. A lot of us are barely getting by. I’m part of that group. Financial struggles harm everyone.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    goddamit, no new job openings today…app is still alive with the utility co. though.

    That is all.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      I upfist only in solidarity. Been there …

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Well shit. And you know that we all think the world of you. Because you are awesome.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        thanks!
        : D

        • WomanInThePersistence

          I just call it like I see it.

    • Me not sure

      Damn!

    • Shanzgood 17 Days

      I hear ya there.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      It’s a tough rackit. Networking never hurts… I believe we’ve discussed hanging out at the right bars?

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        i’ve heard that. A guy from school got a file clerk job…cause he was a bartender and one of his regulars was a lawyer.

        Sigh. I don’t even know where attorneys drink, nor do i want to drink and drive as there’s only one bar near my house and we have shit for public transpo.

        But fair point.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Randy Rainbow is a national treasure.

    https://youtu.be/EYgi5MyMqCs

  • The Wanderer
  • Jamoche

    Dog follows Street View photographer, gets in all the shots: http://www.boredpanda.com/dog-follows-street-view-photographer-south-korea/

    • BosGrl

      This is too adorable. You don’t think of the Street View person with a 4-sided camera hat.

  • HazooToo
    • jesterpunk

      Covfefe?

    • tomamitai

      Is the damned NRA arming bears now?

      • TJ Barke

        Bears lack the right to bear arms, just the right to bear arms.

        • OutOfOrbit

          What about the beers?

          • TJ Barke

            Their beer fridges are bare.

          • Swampgas_Man

            It’s summer, so everybody can bare arms.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Who will save the beers?

        • BosGrl

          But if you’re Michelle Obama, not the right to bare arms.

      • HazooToo

        They do have the right to arm bears… that’s how it goes, right?

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    I kinda love this. I guess they are having some pretty extreme weather in GA, eh?
    https://twitter.com/blanketboat/status/877310201103360012

    • CindyinEncinitas

      Bless his heart.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Is that in the southern meaning? Which isn’t terribly nice, from what I’ve been led to believe.

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          it’s all about the inflection/tone…hard to tell online.
          ; )

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Especially if one is a born and bred northerner.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            nah, you’d be able to tell. I gather that’s the point. say something nice, but the meaning is not.

        • CindyinEncinitas

          Well my dad is 4th generation Texan but I’m born and raised in SoCal, so… is this math?

          • WomanInThePersistence

            I hope not. I was told there would be no math.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Marginally relevant to the OT thread, plus had this playing nonstop in my head this afternoon, so now it’s your turn.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1i4EnjRKVQw

    • Wild Cat

      He nauseates me. Another fuck who made gazillions via cultural liberalism, who in turn spat in the faces of those who gave him free expression.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Did he really? I still remember him showing up on The Muppet Show with fondness.

      • Claire

        Isn’t he a golf-playing Republican now? That makes me sad. I loved his music when I was a little girl.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    I’m sure it’s been posted, but I haven’t seen it.

    https://youtu.be/fRgWBN8yt_E

  • jesterpunk

    Hmm I wonder if this has anything to do with Turnip and Rex’s climate policies. Rex would lose a lot of money if the Paris accord is followed.

    http://www.reuters.com/article/us-climatechange-oil-idUSKBN19B3AR?il=0

    Oil giants including Exxon Mobil and Royal Dutch Shell risk spending more than a
    third of their budgets by 2025 on oil and gas projects that will not be
    feasible if international climate targets are to be met, a thinktank
    says.

    More than $2 trillion of planned investments in oil and gas projects by 2025 risk becoming redundant if governments stick to targets to lower carbon emissions to
    limit global warming to 2 degrees celsius, according to a report by the
    Carbon Tracker thinktank and a group of institutional investors.

    • BosGrl

      It’s just bouncing off me now and that scares me.

      • jesterpunk

        Yeah, its even worse that congress doesnt care. But it seems every single one of his policies benefits him in some way.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      But their commercials say they are the leading edge of renewable, clean fuels!

      • jesterpunk

        And Trump’s commercials said he is the smartest man who was the only one who could fix everything… Look how well that is working out.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        I hear coal is getting cleaner every day.

      • Three Finger Salute

        Exxon: It’s got what plants crave.

    • Bananas Foster
    • not_vh

      hmm. interesting. you are saying commitments of this magnitude based on short view parochial estimation caused discordance in paris?

  • Bill D. Burger

    3% now reporting and Ossoff has taken the lead:

    7 of 208 (3%) Precincts Reporting, 119,803 Total Votes

    Georgia US House General Election 6
    Candidate Percent Votes
    Jon Ossoff (Democratic) 50.3% 60,205
    Karen Handel (Republican) 49.7% 59,598

    http://www.businessinsider.com/georgia-special-election-results-2017-6

    • Me not sure

      This shouldn’t be close, but it is. I’ve heard election day turnout is not good because of the weather. If Democrats don’t let that keep them from the polls there is a slim chance here.

      • Bill D. Burger

        One would think their motivation would be so high they would swim to the polls if necessary.

        • Me not sure

          In most years a Democrat wouldn’t be close even if he could walk on water.
          Handel sucks as a candidate, but that won’t stop the hardcore conservatives in Cobb County from showing up.

      • covfefesumgame0005

        flood warnings are not fun,,,

        When nature throws a flood warning into your get out the vote efforts. Classic ATL summer storm #GA06 @BBCNorthAmerica pic.twitter.com/KOWyTGrjA4— Suzanne Kianpour (@KianpourWorld) June 20, 2017

        • covfefesumgame0005

          kind of reminds of the warm summer showers we used to get in Minnesota when I was in college. Me and a few others rented a house with a park across the street. When it was dark rainy and thundering I would strip down, run across the street, wait for car lights then strike a “heroic” pose and wait for lightning. yes it was mean but it was fun to watch the cars skidding down the street :)

          • iamone99

            #gay

          • covfefesumgame0005

            nice, you came out…

        • Three Finger Salute

          If Handel gets in, the God’s Oligarch Party will say “the sky opened up” and literally proclaim her Handel’s Messiah. Probably play the Hallelujah Chorus too.

          I’m hoping the good-guy wins and they play the Ewok Celebration theme instead.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      Is Trump tweeting about the millions of illegal voters yet?

  • not_vh

    too lazy to research. my working theory is that frozen yogurt is frozen yogurt and hence healthy. so two scoops of it shall be had.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      It was so hot here today that I easily justified two scoops of ice cream. Just like a toddler president boss!

    • covfefesumgame0005

      like a common Trump!

      • not_vh

        :( ok that was harsh. you could have called any thing, you said common trump.

        all because i have a sweet tooth today?

        • covfefesumgame0005

          LOL just make sure others also get two and you’re good :)

  • HazooToo
    • Msgr_MΩment
      • HazooToo

        NASA knows. NASA has seen what lies in the dark beneath. NASA’s desire to leave the planet grows ever stronger.

    • covfefesumgame0005

      only if you have grinded faction with Canines!

    • Shanzgood 17 Days

      My neighbors had some of these. I think it’s a Pomeranian. They sometimes think they’re cats.

      • HazooToo

        They are SO CUTE! I’ve met a bunch with major Little Dog Syndrome, though.

    • BadKitty904

      Fizzgig?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Well, I think it is a very cute puppy, who is well-groomed and very well trained. Kudos to the humans involved.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Static electricity is not just a choice, it’s a way of life.

    • Nockular cavity

      I think it’s a being of pure energy.

      • Parakeetist

        It’s right out of ‘The Two Towers.’

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Hey don’t forget to listen to this song either way, win or lose. It’s uplifting

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbCxjJeKS8w

  • cheetojeebus

    Archie! Archie!!! ahead with 27% in.

    • cheetojeebus

      Damn it, down again..

      • cheetojeebus

        And now he’s back on top woot woot!

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Wow. This’d be a big upset, no?

          • cheetojeebus

            Uh, Yeah! but it’s only 45% in…..but yeah this is good.

          • cheetojeebus

            Damn it. 47% and he’s down.

          • BosGrl

            I’m getting dizzy.

    • MCA

      Thanks.

    • BosGrl

      Archie should really be the R and Ralph the D.

  • MCA

    OT sessions hired a lawyer today.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      So, he’s marginally less stoopid than I thought?

      • MCA

        Yes. Marginal he must be

      • mancityRed6

        his other lawyer told him he’d have to recuse himself.

    • mancityRed6

      I’m not saying a damn thing bad, but the nice thing about the non comments is that if you miss something, it’s bound to come back by. keep it up.

      • MCA

        I went down thread didn’t see it mentioned so I posted

        • mancityRed6

          nope, keep posting things. when they get long like this people will still upvote.

          • MCA

            I honestly took your reply at face value. That’s what I thought you meant.

          • MCA

            The up vote thing, what was that?

          • mancityRed6

            what I just gave you, the non commenters thrive on upvotes.

          • BosGrl

            Has 2 purposes: either “that’s great!” or “I acknowledge your response”.

          • mancityRed6

            I approve and I frequently give out to all the people in that tiny portion of the thread. at least it’s not bees
            https://68.media.tumblr.com/9f0c081e402d5eb411c789895c41bb97/tumblr_inline_o9eque57pv1rkbhjj_540.gif

          • MCA

            Not a non commenter just new and bad with grammar. You always so welcoming?

          • shivaskeeper

            We are all non commenters. Comments aren’t allowed on Wonkette.

          • MCA

            Shit walked into that. I thought they were coming at me. Shit sorry mancityRed6.

          • MCA

            Oh and thank you

          • mancityRed6

            if you don’t come in with the gay sex or the libtards talk, everyone is.
            welcome, and tip if you are able.

          • MCA

            Fuck fuck fuck that is all

          • mancityRed6

            don’t try to earn brownie points.

          • MCA

            Really am sorry though

          • mancityRed6

            snark is life here. just remember that.

          • MCA

            I know, in my defense I was warding off an ass who telling my opinion wasn’t mine.

          • mancityRed6

            sorry, there’s a troll that comes around, “turgid love muscle” that trolls all about butt sex.

          • MCA

            I wouldn’t troll people. That’s not how I roll. Sorry I was wrong to ass u me you were coming at me

          • mancityRed6

            first rule of wonkette, don’t be an ass.
            second rule of wonkette, don’t go against the non commenting rules
            third rule of wonkette, don’t talk about canned clams.

          • MCA

            Shit all this time I thought canned clams was a must

          • mancityRed6

            shh, the others might hear you.

          • MCA

            Well I’m not wearing pants. Does that help?

          • mancityRed6

            just don’t disappoint me. as a Royals fan I’ve already forgiven you for the Reds logo.

          • MCA

            Hey now, one of the oldest franchises in baseball I take exception

          • mancityRed6

            don’t get feelings hurt, that’s another lesson. not everyone acts the same. some of us don’t even like sportsball at all.

          • MCA

            Twas a joke but I deserve knuckle snap.

          • MCA

            Shit I’m sorry. My dumbassery knows little bounds. Again sorry. Been dealing with assholes on here. My bad

          • mancityRed6

            since I’ve been here for almost a full year, I feel responsible to say, if you aren’t being an ass, you won’t get into trouble. and since it’s all snark, it’s kinda hard to tell if you’re being an ass.
            it’s not as inclusive as some sites, but still.

          • MCA

            Your snark is above my level. I missed so bad

          • mancityRed6

            read some of the other stories from this week, especially the dear shit fer brains, then you’ll get a feel for what the trolls do
            https://wonkette.com/618815/deleted-comments-yankees-too-dumb-to-know-they-stoled-old-glory-from-the-confederate-flag

          • MCA

            I will. Honestly I’m sorry. Dealing with a troll myself at the same time. Trying to nail “The System Only Dreams In Darkness” all at the same time. The vocals that is

        • Claire

          Some people are reading on their phones (like me sometimes) and scrolling way down gets to be more of a drag on the system than it’s worth. I have no objections to reposting stuff where it’s more accessible than it would be buried under 1000 comments.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        It’s actually helpful. Some of us are too damned lazy to scroll that far down.

    • not_vh

      ah for this, of course, he has memory. whatta transparent faker.

    • BadKitty904

      Dobby may not be as stupid as he sounds.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        You are setting the bar mighty low.

        • BadKitty904

          True, true…

      • MCA

        Took me a second. Mind if I borrow?

        • BadKitty904

          Tuck in!

          • MCA

            Yes.

  • jesterpunk

    Not a Georgia song but REM is from Georgia so it works.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mSmOcmk7uQ

  • Meccalopolis

    I should have had pie

  • Swampgas_Man

    I’ve got an interview tomorrow. Of course, the job will involve either customer service or cleaning animal cages at a vet’s.

    • not_vh

      all the best. that’s a wide spread in job description though.

    • BadKitty904

      It’s a job. And it’s always easier to get another job once you have a job.

      Best o’ luck!

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0b49a2449bca956e59f9fbdddbd9322052ba72be197e52de8ba3d9385f5d9e38.gif

      • Yr. Gma

        Looks like my polydactyl guy!

      • Carpe Vagenda

        This because people who hire are kind of stupid about what they take seriously. And also my cat looks like that.

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I do customer service. It’s not all bad. The animal cages, maybe not so much.

    • MCA

      Good luck. A job doesn’t define you

      • bbayliss

        Deal with humans or shit?
        I’d take shit every time, it doesn’t talk back and smells better.

        • MCA

          Hey I can’t disagree. Just saying what you do for living doesn’t make who you are

    • Parakeetist

      Critters is good!

  • Jamoche
    • BadKitty904

      Also “By intelligence”.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Which job? His company is making bank.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Where did all those cranky old white dudes come from, anyway?

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        The Middle Ages.

        • shastakoala

          The Middle Aged.

      • Jamoche

        Baby boomers.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          “When did it stop being all about us?”
          — The Baby Boom?

          • Yr. Gma

            Are we going to start that again?

          • Latverian Diplomat

            Heh. No.

      • bbayliss

        I’m here, what’s it to ya?

      • Nockular cavity

        From a country shocked to find it elected a black president, I think.

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        And get off my Interstate Highway System!

    • OddMan

      OK, I see the “lean republican” are going for trump, don’t understand it but get it. Now the white folk going for trump? What the fuck? When did skin color make us dumber? I am not happy with my fellow whites.
      𝕲𝖔𝖉𝖆𝖒𝖒𝖎𝖙!

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        As a rule, I wouldn’t say Republicans are all that lean.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Wow, for the first time he has higher disapproval than approval among the 4th grade dropouts. Amazing, incredible, the bigliest surprise ever.

  • bbayliss

    Pork chop shaped like Florida? Tastes like Florida, Is hot like Florida?
    Be right back…

    • bbayliss

      Oh, just your usual Fla shit.

  • Picabo

    “Let the peace of this day be here tomorrow when I wake up.”
    ― Thomas Pynchon, Gravity’s Rainbow

  • Bill D. Burger

    8%….Satan’s spawn is back in the lead. Gonna’ be a long evening.

    Georgia US House General Election 6
    Candidate Percent Votes
    Karen Handel (Republican) 50.4% 64,185
    Jon Ossoff (Democratic) 49.6% 63,270
    17 of 208 (8%) Precincts Reporting, 127,455 Total Votes

  • doktorzoom

    NYT has nice running commentary from Experts with Expertise: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2017/06/20/us/politics/georgia-special-election-live.html?_r=0

    Nate Cohn: Yes, this is the whole in-person early vote, and Ossoff has a 1.5-point lead. The mail absentee vote, where Democrats excelled, is still yet to come. For what it’s worth, this is about a point worse than I would have guessed Ossoff would do if he were going to win. But, again, it’s really hard to make assessments based on one vote method. Are the Republicans cannibalizing the Election Day vote to do better? Are the Democrats cannibalizing the in-person absentee vote to do better in mail? Hard to say until we see all of it.

    Alex Burns: So you’re saying we need to wait a few hours before drawing sweeping national conclusions?

    • jesterpunk

      But i want to jump to conclusions now, I even have a fancy mat just for that.

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        My conclusion: Trump sucks forever.

        • jesterpunk

          Also the glasses dont make Rick Perry any smarter.

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            They actually magnify the dumb.

          • vivian

            Someone should tell him to be sure to wear those when he watches the eclipse.

          • Three Finger Salute

            [img]http://i.imgur.com/Pa58cz0.jpg[/img]

        • Parakeetist

          This is a true statement.

        • vivian

          Tautologies was a few nights ago, but this is a helpful reminder.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      This airtime (? — what’s the web equivalent) ain’t gonna kill itself.

    • bbayliss

      Not enough swears and cynicism for me…

    • To bad elsewhere they are already predicting Handel to win by a slim margin. I’ll hold off judgement, myself, while not letting myself get too excited.

    • Vecchioivan

      So it’s too early to take a wait-and-see attitude?

      • vivian

        Well it may be premature to prepare ourselves for what may lay ahead.

        • Vecchioivan

          Time will tell.

    • In that case, I’m standing by to be prepared.

  • Jamoche
  • not_vh

    OT. do ya’ll make yogurt at home? the missus is big on that. she maintains a culture. and less cribby during warmer months.

    • Crank Tango

      Yes. My wife makes it for 36 hours because crohn’s.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Culture is for liberal elites. We prefer good old American spoilage.”
      –A Trumpkin

    • I have been known to, but not for a long while. It’s one of those things I hope to get back into after I retire, assuming I survive that long…

    • HazooToo

      My ex made keffir a few times when he was living with me in NY. It was kind of weird and seemed like a waste to me, but I may be biased because it was him.

    • Claire

      I want to but I can barely microwave enchiladas. I would kill myself if I tried to make any sort of homemade dairy products.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Is guacamole considered a condiment? If so, can we all agree it is the best one ever?

    • Jamoche

      Yes. You can spread it on a turkey sandwich to hide the fact that turkey doesn’t taste like anything at all.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        You have shrewdly guessed my dinner plans.

    • Everrett Fanuelli
    • not_vh

      good guacs are great. agree.

    • not_vh

      so btw enterprising ladies have figured out that adding avocados to roti dough is just great. it adds to nutritional value and rotis come out real soft.

      • Canned Covfefe

        Oh. My. Gosh! Brilliant! I want. Now.

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      I had an avocado chile “dip” (salsa) with fresh tortilla chips here:
      http://www.superica.com/krog-street/

      The avocado salsa was to die for …

    • alpacapunchbowl

      For my lunch this week I am rocking salads with an avocado-cilantro dressing. Not quite guac, but it is delicious.

  • alpacapunchbowl

    So the Warmbier family is refusing am autopsy. I understand that they’re griei,but why wouldn’t you want as much information as possible regarding what happened to your child? Seems odd to me.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      There’s not a lot of mystery, is there?

      Some people are really bothered by autopsies, I don’t think it’s inherently suspicious.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        as for the mystery, kinda. The NK’s said it was botulism, a soundbite of a doctor on CNN yesterday said it might have been a beating or infection or a bunch of other things.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          All of which amount to prisoner abuse in one way or another.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            well, yeah, that’s kind of a given.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            Sadly, that’s true.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        I don’t know that it’s suspicious per se, I just don’t understand it.

    • Bananas Foster

      I believe the family is Jewish. Jewish law doesn’t permit autopsies. (Obviously I have no idea how orthodox the family is.)

      • alpacapunchbowl

        I didn’t realize they’re Jewish, that could be part of it.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        The family’s religion is irrelevant if the police need to perform an autopsy to prove that a crime has been committed, but that doesn’t apply in this case. Everyone knows who committed the crime, but they are untouchable.

    • mancityRed6

      I’ve already read something about something that wouldn’t have been known without an autopsy…

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Do tell?

        • mancityRed6

          something, something about how much brain he’d lost. it was on Fox so I trust it as far as I can throw it with two broken arms.

          • laineypc

            I think they did scans, so that would show without need for autopsy, I believe.

          • alpacapunchbowl

            That was reported elsewhere as well, and is one of the elements I’d be compelled to know more about.
            But I get where other commenters are coming from. I personally would still want it done.

          • mancityRed6

            the bigger question is why did he go there? why at all?

    • HazooToo

      I don’t know. Maybe you wouldn’t. They know who killed him. They know why. That seems horrible enough. More might just be too much to bear.

    • BosGrl

      I wanted it and I knew what it was going to say, but I still wanted it. (Thank goodness for everyone here after I read it alone)

    • Canned Covfefe

      Interestingly, it makes complete sense to me. As someone says below, you already know the the what, who, how. If it was a different scenario I would likely want more information but for me in this one there would be little use.

    • vivian

      NK killed him. Exactly how is kinda immaterial.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        I still think I would want one. There will always be unknowns, but it would be much too difficult for me personally if I didn’t have all the information that I could get, even if it provided no answers. Just my personal psychology I guess.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Autopsies are not 100% reliable. My mother took GOBS of liver-destroying medications for 20 years due to a heart condition, and when the VA did her autopsy, the idiot doctor said she died from cirrhosis of the liver caused by chronic alcoholism. Except she didn’t drink alcohol, it was the 20 years of fucking medications, you asshole doctor, which you could have read in the 4″ thick file if you had fucking read it!!!! We had to force them to change the autopsy report and the death certificate. I will never trust an autopsy report again.

  • memzilla Ω

    Senator Al on ABC podcast: “All the Trump people are acting in a way that — they aren’t acting like people who have nothing to hide,” Franken said, before quipping, “There are some very suspicious things there and we may get to the point where we’re asking ‘what did the president know, and when did his son-in-law tell him?’”

    • Jamoche

      Still fond of “What did he owe, and when did he owe it?”

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Well, you know that old saying “If you’re innocent, you have nothing to be afraid of” but of course that’s never true for ordinary people, especially black men. But you’re right. . . that is NOT how people with nothing to hide act.

  • A Groucho Marxist

    I was looking at the forecast map and was all like, “what the hell, does Georgia only have three counties?”, and then I remembered the position for which they are running and felt mucho dumm.

  • cheetojeebus
    • WomanInThePersistence

      Is this even LEGAL? Who did this? We’re there no poll workers?

    • HazooToo

      Goddamn ratfuckers.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Now we know who the criminal element is behind.

    • BadKitty904

      Remember this the next time you hear a Republican claim to be a patriot. Or even an American.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        or shrieking about election fraud.

    • shivaskeeper

      If legit that is bad. That is worse than bad. But it’s hard to tell since it’s just a door with a sign on it. There is no other identifying elements. An address would be ideal as it would clearly show it thus was in GA-6 or not.

      • cheetojeebus

        It’s more complicated than just the photo, read the thread.

        • shivaskeeper

          So that’s a tweet bait photo to get people to Tweet to the 21333 number to get locations of polling places?

          • Angela Ruzzo

            What if you don’t do Twitter, like me? Yes, some people do NOT do Twitter.

          • shivaskeeper

            I opened the thread in a window here. No twitter for me either. .

    • TJ Barke

      Are there even different voting days?

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Laying low. It was 116 here today. I’m still dehydrated from yesterday. I really need Ossoff to win…no moral victories, no “we weren’t supposed to do even this well”. I want a Republican ass-kicking. One we can all enjoy.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • Latverian Diplomat

        “This cake says eat me…I don’t think it’s being figurative.”
        — Alice

        • Canned Covfefe

          one of those cakes we like? could explain a lot…

          • Latverian Diplomat

            I’ve heard an “Eat me” cake embiggens the smallest person. Again, not figuratively.

    • covfefesumgame0005

      109 here, fucking A! and swamp coolers can’t really do shit about it when the water is hot as hell too

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Yeah, I’m a swamp cooler guy too, both at home and at the shop. Up to about 105 and dry heat, they work great.

    • Three Finger Salute

      It’s Dixie, but a district in Dixie that’s an unusual shade of purple, so it won’t be an ass-kicking either way. It’ll be a photo finish.

  • HazooToo
    • WomanInThePersistence
    • BadKitty904
    • mancityRed6
      • shivaskeeper

        Is the bottom one a Heeler?

        • mancityRed6

          red and almost proper stumpy tail

          • shivaskeeper

            I like Heelers. They seem to like me too. At least most of the ones I interact with try to herd me around. One of the smaller ones apparently was snapping at my heels for over a year before I noticed. Everyone would laugh since she was so small I never noticed and she would get frustrated that I never changed direction.

          • mancityRed6

            she and I picked her up (I had to rethink my language), I made her pick her up at a local pet store adoption thing. she was 6 months and the previous owners gave her up because she kept “nipping at the kid’s heels”. yeah, the only stumpy tail breeder is in Texas, I’m in Kansas. they paid good money for this dog they didn’t want.

          • shivaskeeper

            A Heeler nipping at heels? It’s in the name FFS.

          • mancityRed6

            that’s what we said, and after some training she is half the monster she was bred to be.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            You make a bad sheeple! Got any treats?

          • shivaskeeper

            Apparently it’s something about the way I walk. They are driven to herd me. It does not work, especially in the winter when I wear the insulated muck books. There is only one Heeler that I am around on a regular basis that isn’t a true working dog also, too. They push cattle, not sheep.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            Fair enough, but WaK3 Up CATElPLE just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

        • mancityRed6

          the only good pic I have of her not having a tail that doesn’t involve shaving
          https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6f8698cf57ce432d951f9809be9ff8dcb205db0d7e2de64917f220de8596e2e2.jpg

    • alwayspunkindrublic
      • WomanInThePersistence

        Molly! Who’s a good girl?!?

      • Parakeetist

        I want to hear her new album.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          She tears it up on that Telecaster.

    • Parakeetist

      U can adopt from a shelter. Then u iz a awesome.

      • HazooToo

        I definitely will, but first I have to make sure my home is safe for them.

        • Parakeetist

          Ok cool

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          When I adopted Molly from our local Airedale Rescue, I not only had to fill out a 4 page form, with character references, there was a home inspection to make sure the place was safe and I was morally fit, AND a trial period. Small price to pay for these years of companionship.

        • Persistent Demme

          If you’ve never had a dog before, consider a 2-3 year old.
          Fully grown, you know how big they are, and a foster can tell you about the personality.
          Sure, puppies are cute, but they are A LOT of work!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Very good advice.

          • HazooToo

            I’ve had a dog, but he was full grown before I was aware that he was MY dog, and well before I could walk him. I’m going to go for a fully grown dog who’s good with children and really needs love. Any size.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Older dogs tend to make great pets. They are generally very loving.

          • HazooToo

            Mine was a Cairn Terrier named Hobbit. Because his feet were very shaggy and my parents were the most wonderful nerds, who introduced me to the Commodore 64 and 2nd Edition D&D in my early childhood.

          • shivaskeeper

            Lab and lab mixes. Goldens and mixes. Damn near any shelter dog. Especially older shelter dogs. The puppies go out the door quick, the older ones, not so much. Bonus for an older dog is already house trained.

          • HazooToo

            That IS a huge bonus, I hadn’t even thought of that!

          • Persistent Demme

            A rescue or shelter that uses fosters can be super helpful.
            Usually, fosters have lots of other pets, some have children, and they can tell you about how their dogs get along with everybody.

          • HazooToo

            There’s a pet supply store that does a lot of week-long fundraisers for shelters where they sell baked goodies and raffle tickets. I’m going to ask them for recommendations.

          • Persistent Demme

            Great idea!

    • TJ Barke
      • mancityRed6

        yours? pretty blue.

        • TJ Barke

          That’s Wylie.

          • Delu

            Coyote?

          • mancityRed6

            cool as fuck. I miss my red.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Regal, competent, always on time… good dog.

    • Panika MCD

      a) SO GET ONE! so many deserving dogs are looking for homes!

      b) that right there is not a “cherseball”, it’s a longhorn fan.

      • HazooToo

        As soon as the house is safe for dogs, there will be one!

        • Panika MCD

          that’s more like it! but don’t get a longhorn dog because in some areas of the country the longhorn sign is mistaken for devil horns.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Wait, what? This was the officer’s justification for the shooting?
    https://twitter.com/jonswaine/status/877278614282285056

    • La forza del resistino

      first MJ caused fatality I’ve heard of. good job officer for setting medical history, you idiot.

      • Three Finger Salute

        “See? I told you! That cullerd-folk weed is bad! Gonna need to break out the whip if y’all be thinkin’ a’ tryin’ it!” -Jefferson Beauregard Custard

    • Crank Tango

      Says the guy who shot someone in front of a little kid.

      • Nockular cavity

        ^^Goddam motherfucking THAT.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      I heard zero about pot previously. They pulled him over for his “broad nose” as far as I heard. FFS.

    • not_vh

      all the fear he felt, all the justifications he had, it never occured to him to that castile was prolly going through the same emotions. his emotions are ofcourse more valid than castile’s. because.

      did this asshole even apologize post fact?

    • Finnabar87

      Gotta ask that cop if he drinks a beer in front of his kid.

    • Nockular cavity

      A better question: if he fucking murders people because he thinks he smells pot, what “care does he give” about me or anyone else?

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Some people think that Marijuana flavored incense is an accurate approximation…that said, 10 white jurors in a VERY white town. I weep for Philando and his family and the thousands of people whose lives he touched. Fuck that dumb, trigger happy cop. Bring on the civil portion of this miscarriage of justice.

    • Claire

      Jesus Christ, this illiterate piece of shit has the power to execute people without penalty? I thought I was enraged before, but this just adds insult to injury.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      “I was worried about the kid, so I shot into the car. Bullets can’t go through upholstery, right?”

  • La forza del resistino

    The old Georgia saying is “this lection is tighter than one of Miss Scarlett O’Hara’s corsets”

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “I don’t know nothin’ ’bout stealing no elections.”
      — Karten Handel

    • Me not sure

      “Tighter than a tick’s ass stretched over a doorknob”.

  • WomanInThePersistence
  • BadKitty904
  • Courser_Resistance

    Reminds me of my ex-bf. He used to say, ‘Shall we plotz?” I know, stupid, but it was cute at the time.

    • vivian

      Was his name Alexander? Was he from Berlin?

      • Courser_Resistance

        Nope, he was a Jew from Huntington Beach, named Greg.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      It’s like the time I was in Scotland with a friend, and two drunk Scotsmen were so astonished at how much beer my friend could drink, that they said they were “stocked and shunned” and did not realize they got it mixed up. It became a joke between me and my friend for 30 years, but nobody else gets it. One of us will say it to the other and we both crack up laughing, and everyone else is staring at us saying “What?” I guess you had to be there. Alas, the friend died 3 years ago and now I have nobody to laugh with at this non-joke.

      • Courser_Resistance

        Aw, I’m sorry. It is really funny, though!

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω
    • 3FingerPete
      • Résistance Land Shark Ω

        Yeah … over the years he went from long haired liberal to gunhumper. Sad.

        Still … the man can play a mean fiddle.

        • OutOfOrbit

          Monnies has that affect on peeble.

  • HazooToo
  • IrishGrudge

    I live in the Decatur, Georgia portion of the 6th (DeKalb Co.), and we literally had a tropical fucking storm here today, all day. Hopin’ n prayin’ it didn’t help the wingnuts.

    • BosGrl

      Glad you’re OK!

    • Maclare🍩

      I live in Decatur not-6 portion, and yeah, my apartment’s​ parking was flooded when I came home.🌊⛵

  • HazooToo

    I should not have looked at the numbers, should NOT have looked at the numbers.

    • Courser_Resistance

      That’s all I needed to know. Thanks, my depression is now complete.

      • HazooToo

        Actually, they’re showing a lefthand edge. I just don’t want my hopes up.

    • Paperless Tiger
      • HazooToo

        Yes, it’s very screwed up. Currently, Ossoff has a very very very slim lead. I do not want to start hoping. Not yet.

        • Panika MCD

          it’s going to be a while. look at the # of precincts reporting.

          • HazooToo

            Exactly why I’m trying not to peek, or get excited about a .5% lead. It could vanish in an instant.

          • Panika MCD

            it’s mostly from Fulton.

          • Panika MCD

            also too: anything 1%> is a recipe for a recount. never get excited for something that close.

          • HazooToo

            Weren’t they the ones with such unfathomably poor voter security that they got hacked by accident by a guy on his lunch break, and then he tried to warn them and they said “No security problems! No security problems! YOU’RE the security problem” and so he went whistleblowing and they still haven’t fixed it? Or was that another red state?

          • Panika MCD

            not sure. mine’s the one where the AG released nearly 300 thousand voter files INCLUDING SSNs and we rewarded him by making him governor…though now no one is clear on why he wanted to be governor in the first place.

          • HazooToo

            I don’t think I will ever understand politics.

  • Jamoche

    Another talking head saying “the last person to talk to Trump carries the day.”

    I’ve heard that a lot but I’m not so sure. If that were true he’d change his mind, but it seems more like “the first people to cheer for him” even when they change their minds later – he’s sticking hard with white anti-Obamacare idiots even after some of them were going “wait, that’s the same as my ACA?” And the whole Cuba thing seems so random – did he get some cheers in Miami that I didn’t notice?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      I think one may have to get to him before he starts sundowning however.

    • Panika MCD

      you forget that the last person to talk to him is usually someone on FAUXNews.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “I yell and yell, but the people on the TV just won’t listen!”
        — Donald Trump

  • WomanInThePersistence
  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    I am never taking a day off again. I just got an e-mail – my secretary just got separated (read: fired). Which means I will have to take up her work and my own until we find a new one.

    • BosGrl

      I can type!

    • mancityRed6

      the ex used to bring her laptop home until they mad her salary.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Ouch. I have been assistant-less since January. I forgot how hard I used to work.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Yeah – I’m glad we’re now in the “slow” part of the year. But stuff will need to be done, cases closed, paperwork handled.

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Or you could just walk around in circles at the end of the hallway until someone decides you need help.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Was it something she did? Or just your boss cheaping out?

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        She was probationary, and yesterday they talked with her because of some of her struggles (judgment, follow-through, error checking, etc.). I like her as a person, but she really struggled to reach a level we need for the work – I was still doing some of the tasks that are hers because she hadn’t reached competency on what she already had. Her 3 month evaluation was poor, and her 6 month was coming up.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          That’s to bad. Hopefully she will have more success in the next thing she tries.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    LOL
    https://twitter.com/PRESlDENTBANNON/status/877325960659451906
    Ok, it’s already near 3am here (I’m very far from mythical Mountain Time), so I bid you adieu. Keeping fingers crossed for an upset in GA.

    • mancityRed6

      3 am, jeebus, you must be in Australia

      • Martini Ambassador 🍸

        Close. France 😜

        • Get to sleep!….there’s resisting to do tomorrow!

          • Résistance Land Shark Ω

            The French have already done their resisting. Cut them a break …

          • There are no borders any longer.

        • mancityRed6

          must be western, you should only be about…oh, shit, I’m up too late.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      We see our own flaws most clearly in other people.

      • dvlaries

        “If it were necessary to tolerate in other people everything one permits
        in oneself, life would be unbearable.”

    • La forza del resistino

      Mountain Time is mythical is always what I say when I’m 15 mins late for a meeting.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Anyone watch @Midnight? They had three drag queens from Rupaul’s Drag Race. One of the queens said Bannon’s drag name would be Rosacia O’Donnell

    • Red Bird Ω

      He looks like someone’s aunt who decided to wear her husband’s clothes instead of doing the laundry and putting on make up.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      What is this thing that fat, hairy white men have about wearing shorts? Do they have any CLUE how ugly they look? I suppose I should be fair and say that fat, hairy white women also look ugly in shorts, but I rarely see that unless I go to Wal-Mart or to a beach in Italy, which I rarely do.

      I just got back from the supermarket. As I was leaving a car pulled in next to me and out stepped two white men in their 50’s. Both were overweight, both were very hairy (long dirty hair, long straggling beards) and both were wearing 1) dirty, baggy knee-length shorts in camo fabric that exposed their underwear waistbands and 2) dirty wife-beater t-shirts with significant sweat stains revealing plenteous armpit hair and 3) flip-flops exposing long, dirty toenails, and 4) there was not one inch of skin on their arms and legs and chests that was not covered with tattoos. You didn’t see people dressed like that in public 50 years ago. And I thought “Make America Great Again” can mean different things to different people, and to me it means maybe Americans should look in the mirror more often. Americans dress like extras from the movie “Mad Max.”

      • Nockular cavity

        That’s not fair.

        The extras in “Mad Max” were in much better shape, and had much better sense of style.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          That’s true. They also had all their teeth.

  • doktorzoom

    This Chris Hayes montage of Trumpers praising Trump is kind of insane.

    • Delu

      Which Chris Hayes montage?

      • doktorzoom

        Isn’t everyone watching TV at the same time as me?

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          What is this “TeeVee” of which you speak?

          • Latverian Diplomat

            A brief fad that preceded the invention of Netflix.

        • Delu

          Depends.

          I mean there’s a white drape on mine right now….

        • We are all watching you! Sincerely, Big Brother

        • Don’t see Chris on the @midnight episode on my other screen

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          My microwave is watching the TV with you. I’m watching the cat.

        • II Gosala

          Nope. Watching Startrek:Enterprise.

          Which, by the way is pretty obnoxiously macho, male chauvanistic.

        • Count Awesome

          Just don’t turn around, we’re all peering through the windows watching TV over your shoulder.

          • Yr. Gma

            Ow. The count just stepped on my foot. Scooch a little to the left, Dok.

          • doktorzoom

            You must be very tall!

          • II Gosala

            Pfft! Periscope

          • Count Awesome

            I have also been known to go by “Lord Humongous”

        • yyyaz

          I’m much happier to watch my Dbacks battle the Rockies for 1st place right now tyvm.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Not if Formula One isn’t on.

          • Panika MCD

            Anna, I love you dearly. but, as an Austinite, I would be remiss if I did not provide the obligatory eff a whole lot of F-1! right here.

        • Delu

          Aren’t you from the future?

        • shivaskeeper

          We covered this some time back. You have signal lag in the mythical time zone. I don’t think anyone can watch TV at the same time as you.

        • Canned Covfefe

          Oh, aren’t you funny? Made me look, dirty crook…

    • I stopped watching Chris a while back. I find myself screaming at him to shut down his guest who are always talking over him

  • HazooToo
    • Jamoche

      Lots of bad wedding cakes here http://www.cakewrecks.com/home/tag/wedding-cakes

      • HazooToo

        I forgot about cakewrecks! My love!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      I married my ex.

      Funny-strange, not funny-ha-ha.

      • HazooToo

        How did that turn out?

        • WomanInThePersistence

          “Ex” was not a typo.

          • HazooToo

            My ex lived with me for about a year and a half after we got divorced, because he showed up on my damn back porch twice and somehow my dumbass let him back in. I got confused about whether he was an ex before or after the marriage.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            My ex tried that. What is it with some people?

          • HazooToo

            With mine, it was all about respect. He demanded his employers and everyone else respect him as an authority before he would respect them as a person. It obviously ruined every relationship he ever had. And he knew I was soft enough to not let him go homeless.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            You are a kinder person than i.

          • HazooToo

            I will take that compliment, because the alternative is ‘I’m an idiot’. Thank you. But you’re still one of my favorite Wonkers.

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Thank you. And you are not an idiot.

          • SayItWithWookies

            Oh, I might’ve worked for him once. I don’t want to push him in front of a bus anymore — on the other hand, if he walked in front of one, I’d have to think about stopping him.

          • HazooToo

            Sounds familiar! But I doubt it. He was never a manager, he was an entry level peon of a million jobs, demanding to be treated like a King. His sneer left no fucking doubt what he thought of you, and he’d hand it out freely to people who could (and usually did) fire him.

          • SayItWithWookies

            Oh, that’s precious. It’s a good thing he wasn’t in charge of anyone.

  • Me not sure

    The shocker of the evening may be the election to fill Mick Mulvaney’s seat in SC 5.
    With 35% of the vote in the Democrat Archie Parnell leads by 4%.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Are we even allowed to have multiple special elections in one day? Wolf Blitzer is going to get very confused.

      • BadKitty904

        Confuseder.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Confusion amplitude is off the scale!

      • Me not sure

        What do you mean by this ” going to ” phrase?

    • Linda1961

      That district was represented for many years by a Democrat, John Spratt, who was literally targeted by Quitter Palin in 2010. I’m praying to God, Allah and the Flying Spaghetti Monster that both Ossoff and Parnell win tonight.

      • Me not sure

        The odds are not good for either, but neither race should be this close.

        • Linda1961

          True, but I’m hoping for at least one win.

        • II Gosala

          close counts only in horse shoes, hand grenades and hydrogen bombs.

          • Latverian Diplomat

            And Parliamentary Elections, apparently.
            — Jeremy Corbyn

          • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

            Not really true. Republicans can see a trend. If a district that is comfortably Republican by a 25% spread, it’s definitely news if that’s reduced to a 1% spread. We’re talking long haul here.

          • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

            Exactly. A pickup would be wonderful, but keep your eye on the big picture. They can’t afford to have safe seats turning into nail biters, and they know it.

          • OrdinaryJoe

            They have unlimited supplies of rubles for this kind of thing. The Russians don’t care if they win by 1% or .1%, just so they win.

          • Me not sure

            It might be that given 17 more months of Trumpism til the next election that close will be changed to ringer.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      It would be a relief to have an actual human being replace him.

    • Panika MCD

      WHAHAAA?!

  • Yr. Gma

    Has this news turned up here yet? More winning. Ford is going to make more vehicles in China.
    http://money.cnn.com/2017/06/20/news/companies/ford-focus-china/index.html?iid=hp-grid-dom

    • BosGrl

      Wow.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      The guy down the street has a Trump/Pence bumpersticker and decal in his window that shows Calvin peeing on a Ford logo. I’m sure this is consistent with making America great again.

      • CripesAmighty

        Where’s the Gadsden flag sticker? This guy needs to get with the program.

  • IrishGrudge

    I’m getting sick of the “He doesn’t live in the district” horse shit. He literally lives a mile down the road from it at Emory cuz his fiancée is in medschool there. Karen Handel is from fucking MARYLAND!!!1!

    • Ninja0980

      Doesn’t matter.
      It was an effective attack.

  • Count Awesome

    “Florida Pork Chop” sounds like some weird sex euphamism.

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    Georgia’s 6th has gone Republican for almost 40 years. Anyone know what the typical vote spread is?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Like 20 plus points.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      The fact that Trump barely eked out a 1.5 victory over Clinton in that District was one reason people think this is winnable.

    • La forza del resistino

      GA-6 voters over 40 y/o found Newt appealing for years.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      23% in favor of the Republicans. Even if Ossoff loses, the fact that it is thisclose is astonishing, and would definitely be a source of great concern for them.

      • Charon_69

        They’re running the table in house races post Trump…they won’t care until they lose
        I for one am tired of all the winning…

      • cmd resistor

        I just want one win. The great concerns we have had a few.

  • Paperless Tiger

    I reckon I know who the White Knights are voting for.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    I had forgotten in the Delta Green game/novels there is a DG agent named “Anna Mae Killsright”, codename Agent IRENE.

    I’d take that as my Nym, but some R dicksuck will say “Libs are Killers”

    • Swampgas_Man

      You certainly slay me!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thanx Hun. :)

  • Apple Scruff

    John Lewis is dancing and it is my new favorite thing in the world.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Keep in mind that A) this is a special election and Handel will be up for re-election in 2018 and B) It’s only life so fuck it

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    The week isn’t over! The NHL expansion draft is tomorrow and the NHL draft is Friday where my Devils have the 1st pick!

  • Rick Hill
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Rack em up: Avengers, Guardians, Spider Man, Defenders?, Doctor Strange, Ant Man, Warlock?, who else?

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Black Panther, Captain Marvel (?), Wasp (?)

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          Inhumans? Is that still happening?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Thanos, Nebula?, Nova Corps?,

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          Loki

      • therblig

        Xavier School Freshman Class?

    • Delu

      Incoming clusterfuck huh? Not really a good sign.

  • Marceline
    • Raan

      I can’t with her right now.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Only a Trump Presidency will lead to the rigid DOJ oversight of local police that . . . just fuck off already.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Go fuck yourself, you stupid, self-centred c**t.

    • CripesAmighty

      Can we send her with Ralph for a nice, fast drive in a Corvair?

      • Predisenting Ron

        A 61 four-door, with bad shocks and 32 psi in the front tires.

    • miss_grundy

      Aw, bitch, get outta here!

    • Predisenting Ron

      Tell ya what, ‘Doc,’ why don’t you action yourself the fuck away? You brought this, you twunt.

    • vivian

      Whatever Vlad pays you Jill, it will be worth nothing when the world is on fire.

  • doktorzoom
    • shastakoala

      Woof!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Yes indeed. A creepy doggie

    • Raan

      #VitalInformationForYourEverydayLife

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Looking at the margin as indicated by color, I suspect vote suppression in the tongue region.

      • Panika MCD

        since the tongue region is outside the district: who knew so many illegal voters favored voter suppression?

      • doktorzoom

        They clearly used a tongue suppressor

    • SayItWithWookies

      It’s a Gerry Shepherd.

    • Delu

      Could it be that they will screw the pooch?

  • Vorhees

    what is this SC prelim result 51-48 but almost a 30k difference?It looked more like 70-30 to me? Is this just MSNBC making a math oopsie?

    • Vorhees

      ok new screen has rational numbers…and CNN called SC (R).

  • CripesAmighty

    New word: ‘Gooble’–v. def: to cravenly, ostentatiously suck up; esp. with crawling, cloying, groveling, fawning obsequious flattery, e.g.:
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VgV1kZEO64k

    • Joe Beese

      Tim does not look happy to be there.

      • CripesAmighty

        Wait ’til ya get to his ‘remarks’.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I grow more repulsed and disgusted by the craven obsequiousness of American business leaders by the day.

      • Red Bird Ω

        And you never noticed this before?

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          Oh, I’ve noticed it. It just keeps getting worse, it seems.

    • psychobroad

      Why do these people feel like they need to suck up to Dump? What does he have that they want? Disclaimer, I saw the 20+mins & didn’t watch.

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        They know the score. Donnie will do whatever you want if you tell him he’s pretty and smart and popular.

        • psychobroad

          I guess, seems like a big price to pay.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Trumpkins buy iPhones too.

        • psychobroad

          Yes, I guess they do. Seems a tawdry reason to suck up to that asshole.

      • CripesAmighty

        See new condensed clip.

    • Red Bird Ω

      I don’t have the will to watch this. Can you give me a summary?

    • Résistance Land Shark Ω

      These people have figured out that to get what THEY want, they have to massage Donnie Two Scoops’ ego. They be back to hating 90% of Donnie’s bullshit by the time the planes land at SFO.

    • vivian

      Here we have a fine display of Capitalism in decline.

  • Me The People

    Built another diner in Fallout 4 today. Making the Commonwealth great again, one sleazy dive at a time.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2af86506450ac4a5ff8528ef19ec2219b695cd0f5d031efef36221098169b28a.jpg

    • HazooToo

      Another settlement needs your help!

    • TJ Barke

      That power line is not safe…

      • Me The People

        Exactly.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Played Fallout 4 because I liked Fallout 3, but when it came to building things I was like fuck that noise.

      • TJ Barke

        Booo! Where’s you post apocalyptic spirit?

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          Well this was during Obama when I didn’t know I could hone my gaming skills by building shacks for the upcoming Trumpocalypse.

      • HazooToo

        Fallout New Vegas has been the best so far.

        • I know a joke

          This is 100% correct, but they outsourced to a different mob (Obsidian), who did such an amazing job at one-upping them that they’ll never allow that to happen again.

          • HazooToo

            I still haven’t played Fallout 4, unfortunately. I bought it for my Dad for Christmas, and since then, he’s been playing that instead of fixing my desktop.

          • I know a joke

            Fallout 4 is far more ambitious in scope, but NV had such great characters (almost everyone in 4 is dull).

          • HazooToo

            Moira Brown will always have a special place in my heart, along with Gary.

          • TJ Barke

            ‘cept it was even buggier than usual.

          • I know a joke

            It’s been a while since I played, but I kinda remember it being LESS buggy?

          • TJ Barke

            Not a chance.

        • I know a joke

          Also, IMPORTANT: if you haven’t played the DLC Old World Blues, you MUST do so immediately. It is fucking amazing and also hilarious.

          • Me The People

            Totally. It’s a work of art.

          • I know a joke

            So many perfect moments in it. The conversation you have with your own brain. The female brain-in-a-jar scientist who is obsessed with dicks, although she can’t quite remember what they are (“the pitter-patter of little penises” will always be one of my favorite game quotes).

            And of course, the conversations with your various sentient appliances (“He… seeded me!”)

          • HazooToo

            I LOVE THAT ONE SO MUCH

          • I know a joke

            YOU ARE RIGHT TO DO SO.

          • HazooToo

            Favorite part: Coming onto your own brain.

      • Me The People

        There’s so many ways to play the game, that’s one of the great things about it. Personally I love the building stuff, I hope they do something similar for the next Elder Scrolls.

      • I know a joke

        I ignored building at first, but it turns out to be kinda fun building death traps.

        • I know a joke

          Also one of the DLCs lets you trap cats as pets for your settlements.

          It’s literally the only feature I’ve used from it. Sure, I could trap other animals – animals that have, you know, uses – but: cats.

    • I know a joke

      Oh I’ve been playing a lot of that recently. But the endless “Defend settlement X” missions were getting to me – particularly the way that they can fail if you don’t show up in time, even in the most heavily fortified places.

      • Me The People

        I’ve adopted the practice of ignoring them – most defend themselves successfully, those that get damaged, well that’s just life.

        • I know a joke

          I think the problem I have is my defenses are largely deactivated till an enemy trips them (whereupon they get obliterated by a dozen turrets switching on all around them as the gates close, preventing them from escaping). That doesn’t function when you’re not around.

  • II Gosala

    Happy, happy, joy, joy

    By 2100, Deadly Heat May Threaten Majority of Humankind
    http://news.nationalgeographic.com/2017/06/heatwaves-climate-change-global-warming/

    “new study has found that 30 percent of the world’s population is currently exposed to potentially deadly heat for 20 days per year or more”

    “Without major reductions in emissions of greenhouse gases such as CO2, up to three in four people will face the threat of dying from heat by 2100. ”

    “However, even with reductions, one in two people at the end of the century will likely face at least 20 days when extreme heat can kill, according to the analysis, published on Monday in Nature Climate Change.”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      It’ll be way before 2100.

    • Juan de Fuca

      Or tomorrow in Temecula, California. It’s so hot you could bake a pizza in one of those gas grill pizza oven boxes without turning the grill on.

      BTW, has anyone here ever tried one of them?

      https://www.bbqguys.com/bakerstone/16-inch-professional-series-pizza-oven-box-stainless-steel?utm_source=Google&utm_medium=shopping-campaign&utm_term=2918403&adbrand=BakerStone&kpid=2918403&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI-66TyeDN1AIVVWx-Ch1fJA-6EAQYAyABEgKTbvD_BwE

      • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

        I’ve grilled pizza a couple times. Fun way to eat bread, ‘maters and cheese.

      • Panika MCD

        TIN FOIL IN A CARDBOARD BOX OR I WILL REVOKE YOUR MERIT BADGE, BOYSCOUT!

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      An independent study of me, today, has found that in this kind of heat 9 in 10 of the motherfuckers that come near me face the threat of dying.

      • II Gosala

        Threat multiplier

    • Red Bird Ω

      :(

    • Rick Hill

      Makes me wonder if, when you consider one effect of the trump “administration” being that Europe will develop a strong military to protect the EU, coupled with the killer heatwaves that have been surging through the continent, if they will start making military strikes on America. Due to our refusal to adhere to any standard to reduce greenhouse gasses.

      • TJ Barke

        Blowing up coal plants?

        • OutOfOrbit

          And oil refineries.

          • TJ Barke

            Problem with oil is that it’s useful for more than just fuel. Used to make all sorts of synthetic chemicals and materials.

          • UncleTravelingMatt

            That’s the great thing about oil. You can refine it down to be an even nastier pollutant. Why only pollute the water when you can fuck the air up, too?

          • II Gosala

            Yes, yes it is. How wasteful to burn it!

          • Smibo

            Plastics, other synthetic materials, lubricants, solvents, paint-bases, the list of useful applications for oil goes on and on. I would submit that the problem with oil is not its usefulness, but our collective short-sightedness in simply burning it up as fuel.

            Future generations (assuming there are any) will curse us as the ignorant assholes we are, when plastics cost the equivalent of about a hundred dollars an ounce, because we took a natural resource that takes millions of years to develop, and wasted our entire supply over a period of about a century and a half, just to keep our fat asses warm, and get them from here to there.

            The real “problem with oil” has less to do with the oil itself than it has with how we’ve used it.

            (Drunken rant /off)

        • UncleTravelingMatt

          Typical libtard. You don’t even know coal is a mineral not a plant, but you still want to blame it for everything.

          • II Gosala

            I blame coal for my poor life choices

      • II Gosala

        More likely economic sanctions that will put our economy into a tail spin

        • Rick Hill

          Yeah but that wouldn’t impact immediately and look at how well sanctions work on NK and Russia

          • II Gosala

            Two basket case economies

    • SayItWithWookies

      People say “Oh, I’m too poor to have a summer house,” but I can’t see that as anything more than an excuse — why, it’s simply irresponsible not to have a place in Kennebunkport during Mar-a-Lago’s brutally hot off-season.

      • II Gosala

        Poor life choices

  • HazooToo
    • Parakeetist

      Wuff wuff

    • Le Covfefe Royal

      I never knew they could grow in such sandy soil.

      • Me not sure

        They require the drainage.Trust me on this.

      • HazooToo

        They’re very hardy! Given enough love and care, they can grow in almost any terrain.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      That’s just cruel! Pugs require partial shade.

    • OutOfOrbit

      I thought they grew on trees.

      • shastakoala

        I thought pugs grew in pods.

      • HazooToo

        A common misconception. You’re thinking of chihuahuas.

    • therblig

      are they certified organic? we had a monsanto pug once and it was a disaster.

      • HazooToo

        Yes, though GMO pugs are just as deserving of love, even if they have radioactive scorpion claws.

  • wait! what?

    They don’t call it Georgia’s Sith Congressional District for nothing…

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Well, we don’t hold with no dark side over here…”

    • Me not sure

      It’s the Cobb County vote. It always is.

      • cmd resistor

        N fulton also too.

    • Three Finger Salute

      I guess we can call this one The Empire Strikes Back.

      The Rebel Alliance wins in Return of the Jedi.

      (Not the Johnny Rebel Alliance, mind you.)

    • Major_Major_Major

      On the one hand, beautiful. On the other, thanks for making me miss wnc even more than I usually.do. we may be down your way in august, btw. Let’s set up a drinky thing if I can pull it off?

      • If the city folk can do it, so can we “move ins”.

      • Holly

        How did I NOT know you were from WNC? I’ve spent my fair share of time in the WNC – NGA area. Macon/Jackson/Rabun Counties. I miss it also too but I’m really fortunate to be living in the beautiful Berkshire mountains of Western Massachusetts with all these fabulous Yankees that I’ve fallen in love with (one of them more than the others).

        • Major_Major_Major

          I love Cape Cod, and all the damn Yankees are super, but I miss me some Transylvania County (and Buncombe also too).

    • Holly

      That’s exquisite! What’s the mountain? I spent a good portion of my life in Rabun County in North Georgia and our Rabun Bald looks a whole lot like that.

  • divegrl
    • TJ Barke

      It’s just the giant price we pay to not be dirty fucking commies!

  • La forza del resistino

    If Handel wins, I’m sure she can help out the other 21 GOP lady members (9% of caucus) in the kitchen making sammiches.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Republican women scare me though. Because they’re not content to be alone making sandwiches. They want to punish non-Republican women and drag them into the kitchen kicking and screaming to make sammiches — then chain them to the radiator so they can’t get out.

      • redblack

        upfisted bigly. well done.

  • miss_grundy

    Jeez, this is depressing. How stupid are people in Georgia’s 6th district?

    • OutOfOrbit

      Uh….Geogia

    • Panika MCD

      Tom Price +26 points stupid?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      It’s tribalism pure and simple. If given the choice between shot by a Republican or fed by a Democrat, Rs will always go with the Republican.

    • Me not sure

      I taught in that district for over 30 tears. You have no idea how hard it was for me to stay out of trouble.

      • Panika MCD

        tell me more about these liberal tears you educated…

        • Me not sure

          Oopsy. Years.

          • Panika MCD

            but who will teach out liberal tears?! THINK OF THE LIBERAL TEARS!!!

            rarely is the question asked: is our liberal tears learning?

          • Me not sure

            I weep dumbly to think of it!

          • Panika MCD

            did not they Holey Babel teach us do not cast your tears before they are edutated?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Georgia is part of that group of states where the first question new residents are asked is “What church are you affiliated with?”

      • Major_Major_Major

        True story; when I finally went back to school we moved to rural FLA about 1/2 hour outside of Gainesville, FL. For the first few weeks we had countless door knocking god botherers asking us to attend their church. Apparently, the stock answer “we aren’t church going folk” was a bad answer. We had almost as many friends there when we left as when we moved in.

        Tl,Dr: fuck’em

        • Résistance Land Shark Ω

          “Have you received Zuul into your life?” probably wouldn’t have worked either …

          • Jonny On Maui

            “I’m an atheist.” is also hugely popular…

          • Latverian Diplomat

            She is the Gatekeeper. Pretty handy to have on your side.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          “Wait, you mean you never go to church? I mean, not just when there’s a big game on the TeeVee, but never? Is that even legal?”

    • SnarkON

      I don’t know, but they’re all cousins.

    • Jonny On Maui

      How much time do you have?

    • Three Finger Salute

      “Heritage not hate” stupid?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      We won’t know the full results until the Duke Boys steal that ballot box back from Boss Hawg.

      • SnarkON

        Pretty sure there’s moonshine involved.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          It’s “the only way they know how”

  • redblack

    okay. dok. you strongarmed me. here’s your beer money, good for (1) quality 6-pack of your choice.

    thanks for doing what you do.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    https://youtu.be/L_OVlVR3LWI

    this just popped up on youtube.

    • II Gosala

      Yep, pretty much all of it in a nut shell

  • KillerMartinis

    ICYMI here is a happy nice time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYZKrn7Bbl8

    • Hell, Michael Flynn worked for so many countries they could just divide the tab and it probably wouldn’t too much for any one of them.

  • SnarkON

    True “Porkchop” story: Over the weekend a funny, fat, random pug showed up in my backyard., snorting and snuffling, all muddy and happy. We were able to corral him, and when I went to check his tag, guess what his name was????

    • Bannon?

    • Donald J. Trump?

    • Me not sure

      Spicy?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Frederick Pugless?

      • Ta-daaa! You win!

      • Latverian Diplomat

        He’s doing great things. More and more people are noticing what a good doggie he is.

      • Me not sure

        Black pug, I take it.

    • Major_Major_Major

      Huckster?

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Marmeduke?

    • Panika MCD

      Lord Pickles?

    • Mike Pugabee?

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        How much would you have to hate your dog to call it that?

        • thixotropic jerk

          Mutely. Bigly. Yoogely. Sadly.

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Puggy Noonan?

    • Red Bird Ω

      I hear that if a random pug shows up in your backyard a Democrat wins an election.

      • Panika MCD

        that’s only if you feed it a Pugchop.

        • Red Bird Ω

          That explains the great pugchop shortage of 2008.

      • BadKitty904

        That’s ’cause they’re pugnacious.

      • thixotropic jerk

        To think anything else would be…repugnant…
        …Whose a good boy? You are! You are!

    • Pugsutawney Phil?

    • Juan de Fuca

      Puglet? It’s puglet isn’t it? One of our pet house bunnies is named Puiglet because he’s a runt and reminds us of a piglet and because of Yasiel Puig, the LA Dodger’s baseball player. We like Yasiel Puig in the de Fuca house.

    • shastakoala

      Pugsy Siegel?

    • redblack

      doug?

    • redblack