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Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today BUT BEFORE YOU DO, change your plans and come hang out with Yr Wonkette in Chicago tonight! We’ll be at Margaret Burroughs Beach Park at 6:00 PM! That’s right, WONKETTE BEACH PARTY! Including with ME, DOM THE INTERN! And we assume Robyn, she’s not in yet. And also the Wonkette babby! Now onto your stories!

Trump nominated Christopher A. Wray as the Director of the FBI. He’s a former Bushie (43), which shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone paying attention.

Director of National Intelligence Dan Coats was asked to curb the Trump-Russia investigation during a private meeting with Trump shortly after taking office as if he were a common James Comey. Good thing he’s headed to the Senate Intelligence Committee today!

Back in February, after Trump tried to creep on James Comey, Comey asked Jeff Sessions not to leave him in a room alone with Trump ever again, and considering how hands-on Trump can be it’s hard to blame the guy.

Former Director of National Intelligence James Clapper thinks Trump-Russia is worse than Watergate, stating, “I am very concerned about the assault on our institutions coming from both an external source — read Russia — and an internal source — the president himself.” OH SNAP!

The pro-Trump group Great America Alliance will begin airing ads attacking James Comey as a runway stealing “showboat,” while Trump’s aides try to distract him from Twitter with speeches and sequin-clad pee hookers.

Jeff Sessions offered to resign when Trump got mad at him after word leaked out that he’d met with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak, but it looks like Sessions is going to go down in flames with the rest of the Trump train.

Mike Flynn was trying to jigger around with US and Russian military forces in Syria despite the foot stomping protests of Pentagon officials.

Trump’s big infrastructure plan is really more of a suggestion and most of those big Republican ideas were already in motion under Obama, sans the bloated private contracts.

Harris County, Texas, is begging the SCOTUS to let it indefinitely jail poor people who can’t afford to post cash bail and it just so happens to have landed on the desk of Justice Clarence Thomas. Oh, look, an opportunity for wings!

The House Freedom Caucus wants to cancel the August recess so that they can at least try to make it look like they’re doing something other than sitting around with their thumbs up their asses, wasting tax-payer money and avoiding town halls.

The Kansas legislature voted to raise its taxes, effectively eliminating the slash-and-burn tax cuts enacted under Gov. Sam Brownback that have cratered the state’s economy, but their fight has only just begun.

The Delaware House has voted to guarantee abortion rights for all the ladies who might have their slut pills taken away by Trump (but really, it’ll be Mike Pence).

Jon Ossoff had a debate with Karen Handel last night and got Karen Handel to admit she doesn’t support even a living wage.

Nobody wants to be seen in Chris Christie’s shadow. That’s not a fat joke, that’s just the result of Chris Christie being repulsive jerk.

Trump quipped that Prince Jared is becoming “more famous than me,” so clearly that means he’s about to be “You’re Fired.”

Eric Trump went on Sean Hannity and said Democrats “aren’t even people,” because they’re all being SO MEAN to his daddy, and it makes him sad. :(

Of course, Eric Trump was probably pissed about this article that details how Eric Trump helped his father funnel Ameros from a children’s charity into the Trump Organization. And it’s the Democrats who are “sad” and indecent people?

That billion dollar arms deal to Saudi Arabia is a bunch of bullshit as there doesn’t appear to be any actual contracts, but rather “intended sales” that actually began under the Obama administration. FAKE NEWS!

U.S. intel agencies think that Russian fake news could be behind the crisis in Qatar, good thing Trump is tweeting out his lack of support for a U.S. ally with a massive naval base.

ISIS/ISIL/IS/whatever is claiming responsibility for a terrorist attack on the Iranian parliament in Tehran, and other historic and religious sites this morning, leaving 12 dead and injuring 39.

REXXON went to New Zealand and received a single-finger salute instead of a Maori dance, but he was probably too exhausted to notice those Kiwis since their entire country will soon be under water anyway.

This story about Trump’s Tortilla Curtain being covered in solar panels looks like it was scribbled on a cocktail napkin by a fussy Newt Gingrich moments before throwing a tantrum at an Old Country Buffet.

LOL! Trump’s blocking of Twitter users might be an unconstitutional violation of the First Amendment since he’s technically limiting an American’s ability to freely express themselves.

Sean Spicer says Trump’s tweets are official White House policy, and we’re already heating up some popcorn.

A number of tech companies and public interest groups including Amazon, Mozilla, Reddit, and Greenpeace are planning a day of action on July 12 to encourage support for net-neutrality as FCC chairman and genuine piece of shit Ajit Pai tries to take his “weed whacker” to Internet regulations.

And here’s your late night wrap-up! Colbert paid tribute to D-Day and asked Cartoon Trump about his tweets; James Cordon went across the pond only to run into Trump; and Seth Meyers made a point to lady-splain Wonder Woman.

And here’s your morning Nice Time! RED PANDA CUBS!

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  • Nounverb911
    • The Wanderer

      I disagree with the darkness bit, but chaos? Yeah.

  • Nounverb911
    • Oblios_Cap

      That’s making me dizzy.

    • The Wanderer

      Foam kittens?

    • TundraGrifter

      Some folks appear to have a great deal of free time on their hands.

  • Nounverb911
  • Michael R
  • Oblios_Cap

    Here’s a piece of good news:

    Mueller’s biggest hire to date was [Andrew] Weissmann, who is taking a leave from his current post leading the Justice Department’s criminal fraud section. The two men have a long history together at the FBI, where Weissmann served as both the bureau’s general counsel from 2011 to 2013 and as Mueller’s special counsel in 2005.

    Weissmann was instrumental in going after Enron CEO Ken Lay and also in breaking up New York crime families. His position at the heart of Mueller’s team suggests what kind of case this is going to be.

    • The Wanderer

      New York crime families = The Clump of Trumps.

  • Nounverb911

    For those of you that need an Adrenalin rush to get going this morning, this happened at the America’s Cup trial yesterday. No one was hurt.

    https://twitter.com/americascup/status/872168237059850240

    • TundraGrifter

      I watched “Moana” – capsize is no biggie.

    • You know what? I’d still try that. Looks like fun!

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Fartknocker

      I was really hoping for some Bailey’s, honey.

      Mrs. Fartknocker

    • SnarkON

      As a woman who would no doubt have to clean up this mess, I have so many questions. Why would someone put a hot, greasy skillet anywhere near their nice sheets? Why isn’t there a plate for that crumbly bread? Where is she going to put the milk bottle when she’s done using it? What is she supposed to do with the random green peppers?

      • msanthropesmr

        Yes to the green peppers part. Wtf?

      • MynameisBlarney

        The skillet’s on a cutting board.
        No idea about the crumbly bread.
        The cutting board?
        Eat them?

        • SnarkON

          Why would someone take a greasy, no doubt crumb-covered cutting board from the kitchen counter and put it on their nice sheets? And that fucking skillet is going to spatter grease all over the place, cutting board or no. I’m freaking out just looking at this impending disaster.

          • MynameisBlarney

            OMG!
            Relax, it’s just a dang gif, lol

          • SnarkON

            YOU DID NOT JUST TELL A WOMAN TO RELAX.

          • MynameisBlarney

            Oh shit!

            *runs*

      • LucindathePook

        Does she eat eggs with a spoon? Because I can’t see a fork.
        — also a woman who plans things

      • Querolous

        Is she sitting on the dining room table?

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      That’s some classy eroticism!

    • anwisok

      Either: they cooked the egg in a different, same – size skillet and put it into a cold one for presentation, in which case, WTF not a plate, OR; that egg is going to be so horribly overcooked by the time she [tries to] eat it that it’ll be rubber.

      • ZangoCrudmonger

        I would guess you could cook the bacon, drain the grease then cook the egg next to the already done bacon? Nice little bruises on her thighs. Someone got some bouncy bouncy in.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQWFlj_5auE

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

    Mike Rogers cued for first potential bombshell?

  • The Wanderer

    OMG red pandas! They’re one of the cutest critters on this planet.
    Hurrah for the Wah!

  • Oblios_Cap

    Eric Trump went on Sean Hannity and said Democrats “aren’t even people,”

    Funny – most people around the world feel that way about the Trumps.

    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      I think he took the guidance, “Go out there and dehumanize our opponents” too literally.

    • The Wanderer

      Rich white trash. They’re the type of assholes you see making complete assholes of themselves on My Super Sweet Sixteen

      • John Thorstensen

        South Park’s episode in which Satan comes back for a Sweet 16 party is really excellent.

        • The Wanderer

          Yes! Yes, it is!

  • Voyager

    A panda and a fox. Nice!

  • memzilla Ω

    The House Freedom Caucus wants to cancel the August recess so that they can at least try to make it look like they’re doing something…

    Can you imagine going up to your boss and saying “I plan on being completely unproductive for the next ten weeks so I need to move my vacation back?”

    • Voyager

      They just don’t want to go home to their districts and face town halls.

    • Also. Don’t bother calling me or scheduling a meeting b/c i will be busy.

  • Nounverb911
    • The Wanderer

      Sweet scam.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Instead of uncovering this, the press told us to be suspicious of the Clinton Foundation, which by any measure is an honest and effective charitable foundation.

      • ZangoCrudmonger

        I recall it being uncovered, for a hot minute. And then back to our 24/7 email benghazi shitshow they loved so dearly. If not that, Trump’s empty podium.

    • Persistent Demme

      Is it wrong that the first thing I noticed is that Donald’s tie is too short?

  • Interesting – someon spilled their gut to the FBI
    https://twitter.com/LizofMuesliHill/status/872443132234915840

    • The Wanderer

      Good. Maybe we can get enough evidence to put The Toad away.

    • Pierre_de_Fermat

      (chortle)

  • Indiepalin

    Trump is all happy ’cause his in-bred dumb-ass sons told him that this means that Wray will testify tomorrow, not James Comey.

    • PubOption

      ” Fay Wray hates me, she could have got that ape to climb up the Trump Tower instead of the Empire State Building. Think of all the publicity I missed.”

  • beingreleased

    The Kansas legislature voted to raise its taxes, effectively eliminating the slash-and-burn tax cuts enacted under Gov. Sam Brownback that have cratered the state’s economy, but their fight has only just begun.

    But the tax cuts only needed 10 more minutes to work!!!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      The only reason the tax cuts didn’t work already is they saw you were going to repeal them and got discouraged.

      • SnarkON

        Thanks, Obama.

  • beingreleased
  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    Trump quipped that Prince Jared is becoming “more famous than me,”

    INfamous, Dampnut. But maybe potayto/potahto.

    • beingreleased

      Lucky: “… Put on show. Stop. The IN-famous El Guapo.”

      Dusty: “What’s IN-famous?”

      Ned: “Oh, Dusty. IN-famous means more than famous. This El Guapo is not just famous, he’s IN-famous.”

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIGtHhAfe8w

    • Like all toddlers, Dampnut does not know the difference between good attention, and bad attention.

  • MynameisBlarney

    It’s beginning to look like it would be easier to just ask what they didn’t fucking hack.

    http://www.tampabay.com/news/politics/stateroundup/at-least-2-florida-counties-targeted-by-russian-hacking-attempt/2326339

  • John Thorstensen

    About the video: you certainly know how to panda to your audience.

    • Bear with him, it’s still early yet.

    • Crank Tango

      Oh no, I can’t bear puns like that this early.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Just scratch this entire thread; it’s silly!

    • Hollandaise

      I really don’t think it’s that black and white though.

    • Querolous

      Fur crying out loud!

  • TundraGrifter

    President Trump and his minions think they are under pressure. Yesterday I showed up for a substitute teaching assignment (kindergarten) and was told the morning is taught in Spanish.

    My Spanish is pretty much limited to ordering food.

    My first task was to write sentences in Spanish for the students to copy in their books.

    That’s pressure!

    • msanthropesmr

      Pinche Trump. All you need to know.

      • SnarkON

        Pendejo.

    • SnarkON

      Mas cerveza, por favor.
      Yo quiero Taco Bell.
      Si, se puede.

      This is easy!

      • Enough of the cerveza’s and you’ll need donde esta el bano also, too.

        • janecita

          ¡Forget about el baño! ¿Dónde está la zapatería?

      • TundraGrifter

        Cerveca fria, por favor.

        That’s gotten through several trips to Old Mexico.

    • Indivisible Snark Tank

      Donde esta la zapateria?
      Donde esta el bano? (imagine the “n” has a tilde, please….I suck at alternate keyboards)
      Mon crayon est sur la table.

      • janecita

        Ñññññññññññññññññññññññññ

      • TundraGrifter

        Yo penso que la band esta baracha.

        That’s what I learned in high school from a beautiful young lady who died much too early.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Is there a less practical way to deploy a large number of solar panels than in a long, thin strip zig zagging through remote, often difficult terrain?

    • Voyager

      (And how do you get the energy from there to… someplace that needs it?)

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Solar powered floodlights for the wall! Of course, that will mean a long thing strip of batteries too.

        • Voyager

          Yuge power lines. The biggest. The best power lines anybody has ever seen! (+$5 billion to budget.)

        • Voyager

          Ironic that it’s the south side of the wall that would get the good sun exposure…

    • From Russia with Love

      Have them manufactured by Solyndra?

      • Latverian Diplomat

        Well, we know Elon Musk isn’t gonna get the contract now…

    • beingreleased

      It is possible that Trump didn’t think the plan through.

    • ZangoCrudmonger

      I’d be re-purposing those panels in a heartbeat were I on the southern side. Not that I’m implying Messicans are the stealing type, more that I myself am, were it Senior Trumpana’s wall I had in front of me.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        They could use the power for the escalators going over the wall. Winning!

  • Nounverb911

    At least Comey bathes every once in a while…

    https://twitter.com/GovMikeHuckabee/status/872407337214017537

    • beingreleased

      Is that a joke? Really. I don’t get it. (What Huckabee said – not you NounVerb.)

      • From Russia with Love

        Just in case, fuck you Mike Huckabee.

      • The Wanderer

        Ayatollah Huckabee is a conservative, and therefore incapable of making a joke.

      • La forza del resistino

        Huck humor is an acquired taste much like dead dog meatballs.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Huckabee’s humor is hard to grasp if you’re not a Mammon worshiping two synapse type person.

      • Thank you for asking i don’t either.

    • The Wanderer

      A banya can be very invigorating.

      • Paul Dietzel

        You mean like “That’s gold, Jerry – Gold ! “

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      A real laugh riot. I’m surprised he doesn’t have his own HBO comedy special.

    • Holy shit Huckafuck, you are NOT. FUNNY. Stop trying, it’s fucking pathetic.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      …Aand Mike Huckabee will spend day in gay bathhouse to prepare for hearing – until his fake mustache falls off and he has to scurry out through the back window.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Quick, someone go to that bathhouse where Hucklefuck is and slap the everliving shit out of him with those oak branches. Be very, very thorough. It’s good for the circulation!

    • vivian

      Ha ha! This would be funny if: 1) it made any sense, 2) we weren’t talking about the willful destruction of our Nation, and 3) Fuckabee knew how a joke works.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        He doesn’t care about 1), is in favour of 2) and has gone full Dunning-Kruger on 3).

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Huckabee is really just about the worst, isn’t he? If his patriotism is fake, maybe his religion is too. Maybe the whole Huckabee family is just a cesspool of hypocritical filth.

      • From Russia with Love

        Maybe?

      • alpacapunchbowl

        Maybe?

    • cmd resistor

      I did read that a couple of DC bars will open early so people can watch the Comey testimony and there will be specials on vodka shots.

      • Most of my FB feed is in LA and they’re already bitching about having to go all Cheryl Crow with a beer buzz in the morning.

  • schmannity

    Trump campaigned with the Stones’ You Can’t Always Get What You Want. He is now mining the 60s for his new theme music.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSUIQgEVDM4

  • From Russia with Love

    Pretty sure I’d lose it too, if she tickled me.

  • SnarkON

    The Kansas legislature voted to raise its taxes…

    “Dust in the wind.” —Kansas

    • Latverian Diplomat

      They got tired of their children having to sneak across the border into Nebraska just to go to school.

  • janecita

    Poor Iranians. I’m glad that their security services, squashed the attack as fast as they did. According to Al Jazeera, they were also able to stop a third attack before it happened.

    Ps. Fuck the BBC! I got a news alert when the new princess, whatever her name is, was born, but not when Tehran gets attacked by ISIS!

    • cmd resistor

      Not a word on CNN this morning in the short time I watched (about Iran) but a good long segment about Bill Cosby. I suppose we can thank Trump for not having to have 24/7 Cosby coverage.

      • janecita

        Fucking ridiculous! A major terrorist attack happens in a country that has been fighting the IS for years, and our news organizations are sleeping at the wheel. They would have been all over it if it had happened in Europe!

  • PubOption

    It seems that debtors’ prisons are not restricted to decaying St. Louis suburbs.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    If Karma exists, the House Chamber AC will break down about July 30.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Any predictions where Chris Christie’s upward failing trajectory will land him? Fox? Shamwow pitchman?

    • SnarkON

      The White House, baby.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      New Heart Attack Grill spokesman

    • vivian

      I think he’s craven enough to accept a Cabinet position when Trump finally gets around to realizing no one else will work for him.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        He’s craven enough to accept the job of fetching McDonald’s takeout for Trump if he gets the offer.

        • From Russia with Love

          Ehem, KFC or GTFO!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Fetching the KFC is a separate cabinet level position.

    • Mary Theresa

      He’s got experience in traffic control.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      Next to Marie Osmond on Nutri-system commercials.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        As the ‘Before’ guy.

    • kaydenpat

      Is he really falling upward? Haven’t heard anything from him lately which is good.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        He will eventually. The wingnut welfare system guarantees a life sinecure on the grifting circuit for this ilk. They never end up in a dirty bathrobe, selling pencils on the street…where, if there were any justice in this world, is exactly what Christie deserves.

  • memzilla Ω

    … as FCC chairman and genuine piece of shit Ajit Pai tries to take his “weed whacker” to Internet regulations.

    The Cloudflare service is already “slow-laning” users. Cloudflare is a service that a website uses to balance demand on its servers and to protect against certain types of attacks. If you are coming into a site from a VPN, Cloudflare will slow you up for a minute and make you dance through several Capcha hoops before letting you onto the website. I can certainly see Net Neutrality’s repeal leading to ISPs slow-laning ANYONE using a VPN. “Which would you rather have, websites that load like molasses and your privacy, or websites that load quicklky while we hoover up and monetize all of you personal information?”

    • Villago Delenda Est

      These assholes need to be strung up by fiber and left in the wind.

  • La forza del resistino

    Donald arguing with an Intelligence Committee. Why do I sense a basic disconnect?

    • The Wanderer

      My pervert senses are tingling. Could the IntelComm have Something up their collective sleeves?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “At the end of the day, we had nothing in common.”
      — The Intelligence Committee

    • Villago Delenda Est

      NSA is rumored to drop a bomb today on Donald’s orange and empty head.

      • La forza del resistino

        As someone wittier than me said, ‘Will the Trump administration last longer than the NBA playoffs.’

  • Nounverb911

    B BArry Bamz gave a speech in Montreal yesterday:
    https://twitter.com/BraddJaffy/status/872430323694530560

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Rick Wilson is a conservative Republican. We’d disagree on any number of things, but he is a hard core #NeverTrump, and has not changed in that. He also has good connections and a good sense of humor.

    So, from Twitter…
    “Just finished a call that made me reassess my “they’d never impeach” position. Still highly unlikely but…”

    Got this response:

    Only when they see the 2018 landslide approaching at high speed like Fury Road with a flaming guitar player named Robert Mueller— bradchildsNYC (@bradchildsNYC) June 7, 2017

    Response:
    //twitter.com/TheRickWilson/status/872304855569903616

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I love Rick Wilson. Perhaps the only Republican on the planet with a functional sense of humor. Wonkette level snark also too.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Ben Sasse can be kind of funny.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          With a name like that, he’d better have a sense of humor.

        • Pierre_de_Fermat

          So I have heard.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          Ben Sasse is an idiot. Yelling at the millenials for not growing up appropriately according to his standards while ignoring the crushing college debt and lack of jobs paying a livable wage that are unique to their generation.

          Like we need another Republican moral scold.

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        Agreed. Though Tom Nichols can do ok too. Rick, however, seems especially good in this.

  • YoBunnyBunny

    Trumping tapping a former Bushie to lead the FBI. What happened to “draining the swamp”, huh?

    Oddly enough, I think Trump is draining the swamp, since nobody is willing to work in his administration.

    • kaydenpat

      I’m sure the person he’s nominated has promised to stop the Russia investigation which is all that matters to Trump.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        I wonder what would happen if he tried, at this point?

  • chascates

    Wow, how quickly Trump turned this country into a banana republic!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Washington, DC is a great place to hide from your constituents.”
    — Freedom Caucus Guide for New Members

    • From Russia with Love

      You’re pretty funny today!

      Oh, you’re serious?

  • Bemused Australian

    “I do not support a livable wage”
    -Karen Handel.

    What. The. Fuck.

    • The Wanderer

      And she might be toast.

      • mancityRed6

        Toast is smarter than that.

        • Bemused Australian

          Subsistence wage-slavery doesn’t seem like the best of political platforms.

          • efoveks

            Remember sheeple, she’s pro life, so she’s super nice!

          • Bemused Australian

            Sure, but after egress from the womb you’re on your own.

          • efoveks

            Ready for phase 2″ The Exploitation!

          • Hollandaise

            Worked well for Rs so far.

      • mackafritz

        The rubes will still vote for toast over someone competent.

        • BrendaKay

          It’s not even a question of competence. It’s all about that R after her name. There is no critical thinking going on.

          • efoveks

            “”critical thinking” word is tl;dr”– GOP base

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          Some rubes. It was a close race. That one and only debate may have sealed it. Note to the rest of the GOP in 2018, be like Theresa May and don’t debate.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      I’m sure that “living wage” has already joined the Conservative List of Things that are Bad Because Liberals are For ‘Em like “Civil Rights”, “Environmental Protection”, “National Parks”, “US Postal Service”, “Good Government”, and “Fairness”.

      • Bemused Australian

        It’s a contemptible exercise in political correctness. Workers must suffer for their gruel.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Anything less would be a “moral hazard”.
          — David Brooks

          • Villago Delenda Est

            David Brooks is a walking, talking moral hazard.

          • Bemused Australian

            How can they be expected to be productive unless they don’t know where their next meal is coming from?

          • YoBunnyBunny

            Logic to be followed by: “And how can you expect ME and all of us JOB CREATORS to be productive unless you don’t pay us handsomely????”

          • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

            That’s what they say already.

            “The company officers are the ones bringing in the business, don’t you think they deserve to be paid the most?” – A thing once said to me by a douchebag COO who was collecting a full time paycheck for my company (and not showing up to work), while also collecting a full time paycheck from another company… also too, embezzling.

          • efoveks

            Uncertainty is good. Just ask any economist. Who isn’t good at their job.

          • Bozilingus

            They know their next meal is coming from their second job at McDonald’s.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        “A well staffed and funded weather agency for tracking deadly cyclonic storms”.

        • Stulexington

          A well staffed and funded government agency.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      OK Karen, the US Taxpayer can stop paying your wages then?

    • Me not sure

      Karen, honey, the term is “living wage”. I’ll refer you to noted economist Huey Lewis.
      https://youtu.be/lcIK3akktLU

      • natoslug

        Oh, I think she knew exactly what she was saying. May her final words be “Let them eat those cakes we like.”

        • Me not sure

          I was thinking just a dumbass, but you may be right.

      • Persistent Demme

        Is “liveable wage” like “Democrat” party instead of “Democratic” party?

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      If someone cannot afford to pay a living wage, then they don’t deserve to be in business.Forcing someone to work slave wages because you want to own a business is the definition of entitlement.

  • ZangoCrudmonger

    Since Karen Handel doesn’t support a living wage, one must assume, dog forbid, she wins a house seat she would be forgoing the spiffy $174k +bennies, and only take $9/hr for when she has physically, in person, clocked in?

    That and no housing allowance, no moving allowance, no family leave, no use of the congressional doctor, spa, gym or any of the other fluffery they toss at each other.

    Yeah, no. Her shtick is the same as all the R’s: Living wage for me, not for thee.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Fuck you, I’ve got mine…the central tenant of Rethuglican economic policy. Along with you blah and browns keep in your place.

    • kaydenpat

      You’re being silly. She doesn’t want a living wage for those people. Her words are inapplicable to her and her folks (fellow Republicans). Get with it!

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        In the words of that Great American Philosopher Chris Rock, “minimum wage is a boss’s way of telling you that they would pay you less if they could”.

  • Rick Hill

    Ot, Peter Sallis, the voice behind Wallace, passed away. “Cheese”
    http://www.abc.net.au/news/image/8592226-3×2-700×467.jpg

  • La forza del resistino

    Eric Trump is going to war with Democratic non-believers as soon as his Dad teaches him how to Tweet.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    Comey better not give us a nothingburger tomorrow!!!

    • kaydenpat

      He has nothing to lose. Hope he goes for Trump’s jugular.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      If he performs as well as Clapper and Yates, I’ll be happy. Let Mueller do the heavy lifting behind the curtain.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    “To me, they aren’t even people. I’ve asked daddy to exterminate them.”

    –Eric Trump, elephant killer and profession douchebag

    • Notreelyhelping

      Give him a cookie Don Jr. Something to distract him.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    So you and I are “not even people”? Noted! I guess we’re just vermin then, lice even. How long before Eric starts to ask what percentage of liberal blood is acceptable to avoid extermination?

    I guess cancer kids at St Jude are “not even people” too. Cancer kids are gross, after all, and obviously bad people for getting all cancery in the first place. Maybe if they’d prioritized, not bought that new binky and invested in their own healthcare then they wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Dehumanizing the opposition is a great strategy that never has dire consequences.”
      — Louis XVI

    • efoveks

      World According to Eric: Cancer kids at St Jude’s have taker, lazy ass parents who are being punished by a Loving God, so it’s up to entrepreneurs such as himself, to raise money to foot the bill. Preferably from atheist, God hat in’ Dems who aren’t even people, so they can’t complain when Smrtypants Eric and his grifter Daddy convert the funds illegally. No one can bitch about it cuz everyone knows that Skittles have no standing in court..

    • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

      We’re Solyent Green?

      • The Librarian

        I don’t think we even rate that high.

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        No, that’d make us Soylent Red.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    Have a bucket of ice cold water.

    https://twitter.com/jonathanchait/status/872425514161631234

    I wish I could disagree, but I can’t.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      ZEGS and the Turtle are going to go down with Donald.

    • cmd resistor

      Like the wicked witch of the west bucket of water?

      • calliecallie

        I don’t want to be a schlemiel, but this is where Louise Mensch has gotten my hopes up, with suggestions that Ryan is on tape discussing Russian contributions to the GOP. Oh, Please, Oh, Please, Oh, Please let it be true! And take out the turtle also too?

        • And that is what, I believe, Louise Mensch’s job is – fake news to rile up the rubes on the Left. I don’t think she realises it, though – she’s always been dumb enough (I remember her when she was a wingnut Brit lawmaker) to enjoy the attention while not realising she’s been fed a line by spooks.

    • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

      Can he be arrested, charged, tried, convicted and jailed without being impeached? I have NO idea how that works.

    • Persistent Demme

      I don’t think they’ll impeach him, but I think he’ll resign.

      (But then, I was sure Hillary would win, so never mind.)

  • ariel_gee_398
  • Left Coast Tom

    Apparently the problem with Breitbart dot com is that they’re insufficiently racist and pro-pedophilia:

    “Across the pro-Trump internet, McHugh’s firing was widely decried as a
    sign of weakness by Breitbart and an attempt by the site — once led by
    now-Senior White House Advisor Stephen Bannon — to pivot toward a more
    moderate editorial strategy,” BuzzFeed reported. “In pro-Trump circles,
    that perceived pivot may prove to be enough to turn away devoted
    readers.”

    “Multiple conversations with pro-Trump media personalities suggest the
    resignation of Breitbart Tech Editor Milo Yiannoplous in February after
    the discovery of video of him allegedly endorsing pedophilia was a
    turning point for the site,” BuzzFeed conveyed.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      RINO!

      • phoenix00

        HINO – Human In Name Only

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “Breitbart is not deplorable enough anymore.”

      • Jim Johnson

        Not deplorable enough — a DINO?

      • Jim Johnson

        Don’t put all your deplorables in one basket?

    • anwisok

      “Digiday reported that ad tracking platform MediaRadar found just ’26 brands appearing on Breitbart in May, down from a high of 242 in March.’”

      Hehehe.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      So, the black hole of deplorableness is beginning to collapse in on itself?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I’ve come to the conclusion, after reading him at NYDN and Politico and Buzzfeed, that Buzzfeed Ben has pretty much no standards at all in what he puts out.

    • Persistent Demme

      The thought of “pro-Trump internet” and “pro-Trump media” makes me throw up in my mouth a little.
      (I need more coffee for this shit.)

    • Randy Riddle

      Well, that’s good news for Daily Stormer.

  • alpacapunchbowl

    I haz a sad you guys, I am coming down with a shitty summer cold and I think I need to skip this evening’s beach party :(
    I don’t want to get my germs anywhere near our little Wonk-tot (or anybody else).
    All y’all in the greater Chicago area should go though and have several big fat drinks and some non- Chicago style pizza on my behalf! (And psst…don’t be weird and objectify the man or anything, but just so ya know Dominic’s pic doesn’t do him justice, he is a super hottie!)

    • Crystalclear12

      Get better soon and don’t drink Russian tea.

  • Crystalclear12

    Huh, sounds like Clapper is giving Trump the clap.
    Cool.

  • chortlingdingo

    WOW. Karen Handel, when talking about the ACA, basically said that because her premiums had skyrocketed on the exchange, she doesn’t support it. How compassionate! Such values! “I didn’t personally benefit from this, so screw the 20+ million people who do.”

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      And now the rest of the country can see what we in Georgia already know, Karen Handel is a sock puppet and truly evil.

      • Notreelyhelping

        She’s a charmer, all right. Let’s also hope she’s a loser.

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance
  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    Had my coffee, ran some laundry and now I’m watching today’s hearings!

    • ZangoCrudmonger

      These are all good ideas. I will substitute vodka in mango juice for coffee and smoking a bowl for doing laundry. Other than that I believe we are on the same page. (I did laundry over the weekend, guess I could clean a bathroom).

      • LucindathePook

        Oh, hell, it will just get dirty again.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        I have to take my friend who doesn’t drive to aerial yoga. Gives me the opportunity to read the latest issue of MAD Magazine.

  • La forza del resistino

    Intelligence Committee hearing opens with chair Burr says no, I did not shoot Alexander Hamilton and am not the actor portraying Perry Mason, otherwise proceed.

  • William
  • folderol

    It’s always nice when your boss takes an interest in the work you do.

  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    OT – Y’alls know I’m fascinated by stories of Last Stands and near-hopeless battles. Here is another:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezohqY-vg4s

    “The True Battle of Chernobyl”. The first firefighters that arrived from Pripyat were neither informed of the nature of the disaster, not properly equipped to face it. Two firefighters died of radiation exposure that night, and 28 more over the next hellish days.

    The documentary is the story of scientists, disaster workers, Soviet Army soldiers, and others that died from facing the Chernobyl disaster, and whom died to prevent something far, far worse.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I watched that as well as the one done that exposed how the survivors from the town are being marginalized.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        I was in tears watching this. When the Soviet soldiers had to make their own Lead suits and go on the roof for 40 seconds of shoveling to clear the Graphite debris – and they knew it was their duty to do it, no matter the consequences.

  • The Librarian

    Lol, Ms. Handel, tell us how you really feel about not supporting a livable wage. If that doesn’t seal your fate, I don’t know what will.

    • I am not at all convinced this is a win for ossoff. deep red republicans in rich districts don’t give a shit about a livable wage.

      • Jim Johnson

        A win would be very nice, but I fear that all of these special elections will just yield more Republican troublemakers. Sure the margin of victory for the Red Team is smaller, but what if we close 85% to 95% of the gap in every race with incumbent Republicans and don’t make any actual gains in Congress?

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      The median income in that district is $82K, well above the national average. I think she could have said, “I’m ready, willing and able to fuck the poors without benefit of lube and give the savings to the wealthy,” and she’d still be okay. Ossoff was talking to the country. She was speaking directly to her constituents.

      • 🛶🗣️ Mr Canoehead 🛶🗣️

        Don’t show her A Modest Proposal.

    • TakingAmes

      Oh, it won’t. This is suburban Atlanta we’re talking about here.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    And speaking of Christie’s shadow, Christopher A. Wray was his Bridgegate lawyer, and his lawfirm represents Rosneft.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      You really can’t make this shit up. Although I frankly wonder if all the various Russian entities simply have engaged every major US law firm specifically to compromise them.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    Trump says Christopher Wray has “impeccable credentials.” That means a white, male Republican with no ethical standards.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      haha– this was literally my first thought on hearing the story this morning.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    Wonkagenda seems to be getting longer and longer every day, which is no surprise. But I have this dream of one day opening the Wonkagenda and reading “Nobody fucked up anywhere in the world yesterday, so we’re taking the day off.”

    • Me too :/

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I sometimes think back on the Watergate hearings, which were surpassingly boring to watch on TV and read about in our daily print newspapers, besides which I was 16 and had more interesting things to do with my time, and I wonder what that situation would have been like if we had had the Internet in 1972. This would make a good skit for SNL.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Or just a bunch of Darwin Award-type articles.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        All Florida man, all the time.

  • FauxAntocles

    Wray’s firm works with a sanctioned Russian oil co (Rosneft) and lobbies for the Saudis AND oversees Trump’s business assets – SSDD.

    • Internet Hitler

      Hey, somebody is robbing the bank and all the cops are fired!

      Eh, just send over their lawyer.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    The most shocking bit in the article about Harris County, TX jailing hundreds of poor people because they can’t afford bail is the statement that there are 8,800 people in jail in Harris County. That’s not a jail, that’s a small town.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Also how can it possibly be cheaper to let people out OR than to house/feed them? Really makes you wonder about conditions in Harris County jails.

      • Randy Riddle

        Easier than letting out to vote.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I have a friend who has a friend whose son is in prison for killing his mother-in-law with a kitchen knife in a fit of rage when he found out said mother-in-law had been sexually and physically abusing his 4-yr-old son, who lived with the mother-in-law (parents are divorced, the mother is a meth addict). They gave the guy 2 life sentences – one for 2nd degree murder, and a second for “murder with a deadly weapon”, to be served sequentially. He was 24 years old at the time, so that means he’ll be in prison for a very long time. I got curious and looked up how much it costs to keep him in prison every year, and the base estimate is $25,000 per year. Also, they don’t give him soap or socks or underwear or toothpaste, he has to work in the prison factory to earn the money to buy those things, and his relatives are not allowed to send him soap or socks or underwear or toothpaste.

        My attitude is that quite a few people I know would have reacted the same way he did in the same situation. His main problem was that there happened to be a kitchen knife sitting 2 feet away from him when he got angry, as the revelation occurred in his mother-in-law’s kitchen. But my point is that this is unlikely to happen to him again, it was a one-off situation. I don’t consider him to be a huge risk to society, but my tax money will keep him in prison for the rest of his life.

        • Persistent Tennessee Rain

          There’s no way that’s a just verdict.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I agree. Isn’t one life sentence for murder enough? It wasn’t premeditated, and he had no record of violence, and he was somewhat provoked. I frankly don’t see what’s wrong with 20 years. They got away with this because he is poor and uneducated and couldn’t afford a private lawyer. What they would have done to him if he had been black, I can’t even imagine.

          • Persistent Tennessee Rain

            Do you mind revealing the state?

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Missouri. The Show Me State, as in “Here’s my gun, show me yours.” Alternatively “Here’s my GED certificate, show me yours.” It is supposed to mean that Missourians are skeptical, but what it really means is that they are stubborn as mules and don’t listen to reason even if it will benefit them in some way. If you tell them the sun rises in the east, they will suspect you are a city slicker who is trying to make them look foolish, and they will argue about it. The sun doesn’t rise in the east, it rises “over yonder by the grain silo.”

          • Persistent Tennessee Rain

            I would think the more reasonable charge would have been for voluntary manslaughter (one count) which is 5 to 15 years.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I agree. Law enforcement in Missouri is really fucked up. A friend who was riding his motorcycle down a city street in broad daylight was hit by a woman driving a car who turned left in front of him without looking. His left leg was amputated, his right leg was broken in 15 places, he lost his job, he lost his health insurance, he lost his apartment, and he would have died at the scene if a trauma nurse passing by had not witnessed the accident and immediately applied a tourniquet to each leg. The worst they can do to her is a $250 fine for “careless and imprudent driving” and a $250 fine for failing to have insurance. She has a criminal record for numerous traffic violations, plus a DUI, but she will still just walk away with a $500 fine. If she had killed him, it would have been vehicular manslaughter, but ALMOST killing him and destroying his life is apparently not a chargeable offense other than “careless and imprudent driving.” And of course, because she has no insurance, no lawyer will touch a civil lawsuit against her, because she has no money.

          • Persistent Tennessee Rain

            You can’t get blood from a turnip. You posted this story before. Did I give you links to victims recovery websites? I know I had intended to – it’s a long shot to find money there, but what has he got to lose? Also, he did get the policy limits on his own policy, right?

          • Angela Ruzzo

            Yes, I’ve posted it several times. It is ongoing, as the court hearing keeps being continued, and his enormous medical bills keep growing, and now the other driver is pleading not guilty and threatening to sue my friend, so I am still angry about it. I looked up victim recovery sites, but all of the ones in Missouri specifically exclude victims of car accidents. I can’t think why, except that there are a lot of those. Yes, he got some money from his own policy. I am encouraging him to buy a little 1000 sq. ft. house with all of it – a $50,000 foreclosure, then he won’t have to pay $650/mo rent out of $1478/mo SSDI. He could pay cash and be exempt from taxes on it. But it’s a HUD house, and it takes forever for them to make up their mind. It’s in good shape, just needs new laminate flooring in the living room and kitchen.

  • Poly_Ester

    Little chilly for a beach party in Chicago tonight. In the 50’s winds off the lake.

    • I am delighted as our a/c isn’t getting fixed for a least another week. This weekend is going to SUCK (we have one little sad bedroom unit).

    • Internet Hitler

      Put a hat on that babby.

  • I’m sorry but what did i do in a previous life that prevented me from a full time job rubbing red panda bellies?

  • Marceline

    At this point it doesn’t matter who Donnie names to the FBI. The rank-and-file will either ignore or sabotage that person outright. Nobody Donnie names will ever be considered legitimate by the their peers. I suspect Gorsuch is finding that out in little ways. (“Oh sorry, I only brought enough danish for the eight of us. Perhaps you can try the vending machine in the basement.”)

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Gorsuch has already exposed himself to be A Idiot. And the FBI head will either be a Trump stooge or experience the same obstacles that Comey did. Time will tell.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    I think it’s time to just say there’s an action/march/protest every Saturday from now until Drumpf is gone. It’s too exhausting trying to find all the individual actions.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Sunday is the Equality Marches (aka Pride). I plan to go to the one in Atlanta. I went to the Woman’s March in Atlanta and just got back from the March for Truth in DC last week.
      The key is to identify your issues and support activities to keep those issues in the forefront. I have friends that send postcards and faxes, that make phone calls, that attend marches, that stake our the congressmen and senator offices.
      Everyone can do something but anyone can’t do everything. Pick one and stick with it because We Don’t Die, We Multiply.

  • Bitter Scribe

    If that blonde in the video tickled my belly like that, I think I’d lose it too.

  • Bitter Scribe

    So Christie is political poison? Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.

  • Eric said that, eh?
    Ok, anyone wanna tell me precisely whom is demonizing whom? And that both sides do it?

  • eyelashviper

    The spate of political cartoons is hard to keep up with..
    I just hope that the Hoofwanker-In-Chief cannot ignore them.
    http://www.suprmchaos.com/lumpy_gassing-up_060717.jpg

    http://editorialcartoonists.com/cartoons/AnderN/2017/AnderN20170607_low.jpg

    https://cdn.creators.com/198/205470/205470_image.jpg

    • tracey marie

      Hiya elv, as usual I love your posts.

      • eyelashviper

        Hi, good to see you! How are things in your world?

        • tracey marie

          Fantastic, I don’t wander the sites but this article was recommended at a blog. You good?

          • eyelashviper

            Surviving, given our political reality.
            Always good to see you, here or elsewhere.

  • SweetDeeKat

    I want to see the anti-Comey ads. He’s not running for office, and the masses don’t get to vote on criminal charges/impeachment, so, why?

    • dshwa

      Gotta keep the followers believing that Russia is fake news.

    • Rex Thorne

      To cause a peasant uprising. Trump loves the poorly educated because he can use them to destroy the country.

  • Lucas Foxx

    RIP Ronnie Corbett.

    “We will be talking to an out of work contortionist who says he can no longer make ends meet.”

    “All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my right hand.”

    “It was revealed in a government survey published today that the Prime Minister is doing the work of two men, Laurel and Hardy.”

    “There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done.”

    “West Mercia police announced tonight that they wish to interview a man wearing high heels and frilly knickers, but the Chief Constable said they must wear their normal uniforms.”

    “We’ll be talking to a car designer who’s crossed a Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame.”

    “We’ve just heard that in the English Channel, a ship carrying red paint has collided with a ship carrying purple paint. It is believed that both crews have been marooned.”

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/03/31/ronnie-corbett-dies-aged-85/

  • Zyxomma

    Have fun at the drinky thingy.

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