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They should probably ban her from the TV again.

Kellyanne Conway, back in December:

I will tell you that the president-elect looks at his social media accounts … as a very good platform which to convey his messages.

Kellyanne Conway on Monday morning, telling the “Today” show crew that the president’s tweets really don’t speak for the president, so YOU SHUT UP:

 

KELLYANNE CONWAY: For every time you’ve said Russia, imagine if you said ISIS. Every time you say Twitter, imagine if you said terrorist. Maybe we’d have a different type of vigilance.

SAVANNAH GUTHRIE (CO-HOST): Kellyanne, in fairness, he’s setting the agenda. He’s the president. He speaks, the reporters cover what he said.

[…]

CONWAY: … [T]his obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little of what he does as president …

CRAIG MELVIN (CO-HOST): That’s his preferred method of communication with the American people.

CONWAY: That’s not true.

Don’t listen to what Kellyanne Conway says at any given time, because she’s probably lying. Moreover, don’t listen to what the president says on Twitter, because that’s just a buncha bullshit, even though it’s the way he prefers to communicate with people (without having to use the FAKE NEWS LYING ALTERNATIVE FACTS LAMESTREAM MEDIA as an interlocutor), except that it’s not his preferred method of communicating with people.

SO SAYETH KELLYANNE CONWAY, LET IT BE WRITTEN IN STONE.

So what the fuck is this latest nattering horseshit from the president’s most enthusiastic spokes-liar? Well, it seems the White House is embarrassed about how Trump has been going all Crazy Pants on Twitter, attacking the London mayor by misquoting him, and also refuting the administration’s OWN ARGUMENTS by tweeting that the Muslim Travel Ban (motto: “Don’t call it a ban, it’s not a ban!) is totally a ban, and even better than that, tweeting that the ORIGINAL ban, the one that was even more unconstitutional than the current one, was the BEST ban.

Weirdly, Kellyanne Conway’s husband George, who recently withdrew his name from consideration for a big guy job at the Justice Department, seems to disagree with his wife:

Oof. Somebody is sleeping in the dog house tonight, or as Mrs. Conway probably refers to it, the “Bowling Green Alternative Facts House.”

“Don’t pay attention to Trump’s lying poopy tweets” seems to be the administration’s official line today, because Trump’s fey spokes-cuck Sebastian “I’m not a Nazi!” Gorka appeared Monday on CNN’s “New Day” and said this:

CHRIS CUOMO: What’s really relevant are the tweets that the president put out this morning where he said what we have believed all along, and you guys have denied, which … this is a ban. And he put his arms around the original order, which obviously targeted Muslim populations. […] We saw it play out in his response to London. Are you OK with him going after the London mayor in a time of crisis?

SEBASTIAN GORKA: I just find it really disappointing that, not only did you have one of your staff on before me for several minutes to discuss the president’s tweets, that now we’re eight minutes into this interview and you’re doing it again. Let’s talk about policy. I’d like to talk about policy, not tweets.

CUOMO: That is the policy. His tweets are the policy.

GORKA: A hundred characters is not policy. It’s not policy.

CUOMO: They are statements from the president of the United States about what he wants.

GORKA: It’s not policy. It’s social media, Chris.

Oh dang, Sebastian, you tried very hard, but that defense of the president was just a little bit too “pajama boy” for our tastes.

Of course, by saying we shouldn’t focus on the president’s tweets, Conway and Gorka are sort of in the neighborhood of being technically correct, but for the wrong reasons. They’re trying to distract us from the real issue, which is that the president lies all the time, or he’s too stupid and uninformed to know he’s not telling the truth. Indeed, both the Associated Press and NBC News have had occasion in the past couple days to point out that Trump’s tweets, ESPECIALLY during times of crisis, are ridiculously dishonest and unhinged bullshit.

But Conway and Gorka aren’t saying that. They’re saying we should ignore what Trump says on Twitter — even though it’s his favorite, bestest mode of communication, according to Conway — because it hurts the White House’s agenda when Trump speaks for himself.

They could always take away Trump’s phone and stomp on it (which would make Trump’s lawyers very happy!), but they don’t have that clout, so we guess Trump will just keep stepping on his dick, by speaking for himself.

Weak! Sad!

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  • ariel_gee_398

    Does OSG stand for something other than orange shit-gibbon? Did Kellyanne’s husband really just call Trump that?

    • msanthropesmr

      I am not down with OSG

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Yes, I know thee.

    • therblig

      didn’t he just pass on the solicitor general job? i guess he wants to preserve his own reputation and dignity.

      • ariel_gee_398

        Actually, maybe that’s it – Office of the Solicitor General, who would be arguing the case before SCOTUS. Certainly not the first thing that comes to mind when thinking of Trump, though.

    • chazmanr

      Like everyone associated with Trump, he is a moran and thinks “attorney” starts with an “S”.

    • efoveks

      Oversized Scary Gubmint. (Let’s make it smaller!!!111!!)

  • msanthropesmr

    HE DOESNT HAVE ANY POLICY. YOU FUCKING NUMBNUTS

    • chazmanr

      Yes he does. If it is part of the Obama legacy, he is agin it. If it is supported by the fever swamp of right wing media (Breitbart, FoxNation, WorldNutDaily, etc) he is for it. If he was for it prior to his running for office, he is agin it now.

    • Jeffery Campbell

      THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • WeaselPoo

      Apart from ME ME ME Jared ME IVanka ME ME ME Melania who? ME ME ME .
      MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

  • ConnieHinesDorothyProvine

    You’ll have to forgive Kellyanne Conjob. She just got out of the coffin, so she’s not thinking straight.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Hasn’t had her first cup of covfefe yet?

  • Jeffery Campbell

    As a young lad, I was a cool and facile liar, but I bow down to these people. I at least had a modicum of shame.

    • BackDoorMan

      … I will never forget my Dad saying to me “you should be a lawyer or a politician”, and when I asked “why?”, he said… “because you can lie so convincingly and with such a straight face.” At the time, callow youth that I was, I took it as a compliment.

  • Michael R

    I’d like to see a campaign where everyone just tweets ” FUCK YOU DONALD TRUMP ” in response to anything he says , the bullshit is never going to stop .
    There’s no reason to respond to this every day like it’s some form of entertainment .

  • lucidamente

    You know what else Sebastian Gorka would like you to ignore?

    • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

      That he’s a fucking fascist?

      • efoveks

        At least he’s getting fucked.

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      Don’t mention the war!

    • The Wanderer

      The fact that he and Chuck Todd are members of a secret beard fighting club?

      • msanthropesmr

        Do the beards get off the faces and then fight​? I’d pay to see that.

        • The Wanderer

          So would I. (giggles)

    • HarryButtle

      The literal skeleton in his closet wearing an SS uniform?

  • JMP

    “[T]his obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little of what he does as president”

    But he’s done almost nothing as President; which is very lucky considering how horrible all the things he’s tried and miserably failed to do have been.

    • TJ Barke

      Obsession? It’s not an obsession to pay attention to what the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA says on the internet. It’s called being fucking diligent.

      • efoveks

        NOT WHEN YOU ASK KWES-CHUNZZ!!!!111111!

    • Vincent Ricola

      It’s the same obsession that compels us to talk about Russia and sketchy Jared being sketchy instead of all those presidential accomplishments that don’t exist. What is wrong with us?!

    • goonemeritus

      Trump has done plenty, who else could have pissed off three continents in his first 4 months in office.

  • NEWSFLASH: KaC is not living alone with 17 cats.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      That’s the most surprising news to come out of this interview.

    • CRAZY CAT LADY LIBELZ!!!

    • Granny Sprinkles

      Good, she doesn’t deserve cats.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    I got an idea. Let’s start sending pretzels to Trump’s media folks since they’re good at twisting themselves into that shape.

    • msanthropesmr

      I got a better idea. Let’s send them giant bags of lightly salted rat dicks.

      • efoveks

        The Wonkette recipe hub strikes again!

        • msanthropesmr

          It was either that or canned clams.

          • Pilotshark

            canned clam dip for the lightly salted rat dicks.

          • msanthropesmr

            That was the best Soul Asylum album by far.

      • MOG253

        I keep several bags on the freezer for guests who overstay their welcome!!

      • BackDoorMan

        … lightly salted rat dicks… twisted into pretzel shapes! Everybody’s happy!

  • efoveks

    Funny, Trump gets the same “media treatment” as Obama, and suddenly, it’s not coverage, it’s obsession. Someone might think that he’s in some kind of service job to the American people…

    • MrTusks

      Twitter should exercise their rights as a private service provider and cancel his account for spewing hate speech.

      • willi0000000

        they should, at least, kill any non-POTUS account he has access to.

        make him use only the POTUS account and even some of his longest running supporters will begin to say “that’s not what a president sounds like”

      • data_ninja

        I dream of this day.

      • efoveks

        In a way, Twitter would even be doing him a favor.

  • Joe Beese

    Whatever he’s paying these people, it’s not enough.

    • anon_the_great

      Paying? Lord Dampnut doesn’t pay people like some common Capitalist.

    • Anna Rompage

      We are paying these people unfortunately, with our own tax dollars…

    • Dudleydidwrong

      He’s paying? No. We’re paying. They’re sucking from the public trough through a large hose. They’re paid to lie and we’re paying them too much. Bullshit is a cheap commodity in DC these days.

    • Bemused

      IDK, I think it’s more a case of now we know what they are, and the price is cheaper than we thought.

  • Covfefe’s Evil Twin

    Well, at least I’ll have a shiny new Obamaphone to watch read the tweetstorm of the apocalypse. #WWDC

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    Not True! Not True! You’re the Truth!

  • JMP

    Pay no attention to the man in front of the curtain!

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    So don’t pay attention to what His Fraudulency says on Twitter, unless we tell you to pay attention to what he says on Twitter.
    Got it. Totally clear. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/197fc6da55cd6da87d2c6d530681d3ba52352ca651aa2de25eced024eae5a51d.jpg

  • anon_the_great

    And the snake finally consumes itself.

  • Vincent Ricola

    What are the betting odds on when Trump’s twitter account finally gets hacked by an actual 400lb 14-year-old laying in bed? I’ve got a fiver on beginning of August.

    • anon_the_great

      Will we notice?

      • msanthropesmr

        Fewer misspellings and a strange obsession with DVa

        • Vincent Ricola

          Better domestic policy, also, too.

          • Opalescent Riddles

            Even NO domestic policy would be better than 45’s.

        • MrTusks

          Trump thinks he’s McCree, looks like Roadhog, and is about as reliable as Hanzo.

          • msanthropesmr

            I’m a Soldier 76/Bastion/Orisa/Lucio guy myself.

    • Marceline

      It’s already been hacked by a 400lb guy with dementia.

    • puredog

      Trump’s pushing 400.

  • Covfefe

    When the lawyers can’t stop the tweets, you send in Kellyanne.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      ♫ You can’t stop the tweeets.. ♫

  • BigCSouthside

    It baffles me that this administration is still in the White House

    • Anna Rompage

      It’s actually pretty difficult to remove a sitting precedent, especially when congress is controlled by his/her own party…

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        It’s actually fairly easy. Just, you know, messy.

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    Human Moebius Strips!

  • andyshelt

    “very little of what he does as president …”

    Well, as he does “very little as President”, she was nearly right!

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “Supreme court will be to blame if they do not approve my Muslim Ban before TERIBLE things happen in USA.” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • Jgb979

    So ……nobody show him the draw feature on iPhones.

    Otherwise the phrase “the presidential dickpick” will be uttered in the very near future.

    Love how even his staff treats him like a 3 year old child now

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    I was wondering, does CNN request a Nazi for the interview or is that all the administration has left? I recall a time that being a Nazi disqualified you from participating in public discussions.

  • elviouslyqueer

    I would just like to go on record and say that that emaciated Wig on a Stick needs to Mapquest the nearest place in which to fuck off, push the start route button, and proceed to fuck the fucking fuck off to aforesaid place with the quickness. And then repeat the process forever.

    Oh, and that pretentious Hungarian blowhard can be Louise to KaCa’s Thelma on this little road trip to fuck the fuck off land.

    • Perkniticky

      Fuckin’ A!

      • elviouslyqueer

        Fuck yea!

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      All the upfists are belong to you!11!!1eleventyone!!1111!

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    “For every time you’ve said Russia, imagine if you said ISIS.”

    OK! Kellyanne, it seems that Trump is bent on alienating just about everyone in the world except ISIS. It certainly does seem like an extraordinary number of his appointees have had secret contacts with ISIS. Does ISIS have something on the president? Why does he appear to be so solicitous of ISIS?

    • JMP

      And thing is Donald actually is doing everything he can to strengthen and normalize ISIS.

      • ‘Covfefe is Magic’ Ron

        Not that he’s aware of it.

    • WotsAllThisThen

      He keeps praising ISIS. Why?

  • Lance Thrustwell

    If they just made little air quotes when they use words like “policy,” or “ideas” or “truth”, then things would be clearer.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/31dfb2bedbff511fc417ab9f89dca68bfca336b9bdb9236ad3c2c16086c8c342.gif

    • Indivisible Snark Tank

      Dampnut’s (and most Republicans) idea of the value of money resembles Dr. Evil, as well.

      “One MILLION dollars!”
      “Sir, that’s not actually that much money…”
      “ONE HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS!”

      Nothing in-between. And the silence that’s accompanied the $2 TRILLION math error in Dampnut’s budget has been deafening.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        Like Twitter, you can’t take what he says on a budget proposal seriously.

  • Mpeg

    KellyAnne, KellyAnne,
    Quite contrarian,
    How does your garden nose grow?

  • goonemeritus

    Trump’s spokespeople can’t speak for him and now Trump can’t speak for himself. I will therefore revert to getting all my Trump news from Wonkette.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’ll continue to pull my Trump news out of my ass, since what comes out of there is equivalent to what Trump and his minions present to the American public on a daily basis.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Actually, I’m sure what you come up with would be more sane. Because you aren’t a 70-year-old con artist with a broken brain.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Yeah, but it’s harder to get the jokes that way.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    If we have another large scale terrorist attack on Trump’s watch, he’ll claim it happened because the cucks in the GOP and the Dems wouldn’t allow him to ban Muslims from the USA. His idiot followers will be thrilled that Trump was “proven” to be right. Meanwhile, 4 people were murdered in the USA this AM, but I haven’t seen any tweets about that.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Isolated incident, except to argue that more guns are necessary (never mind that Florida is one of the most gun-friendly states in the country).

      • Wookie Monster

        Mass shootings are not caused by guns. They’re caused by mental illness. Now excuse me while I be a good republican and resolve not to do anything about either issue.

    • The Wanderer

      In the back of my head, I just heard Angela Lansbury’s lines in Manchurian Candidate: “It will make martial law look like anarchy.”

    • Vincent Ricola

      Donald spent his twitter allowance on those London mayor shit tweets this morning, Bannon won’t let him have a chance to shit tweet on those murdered Americans until tomorrow.

    • JMP

      Remember mass shootings were always big news – well except for those that came from domestic violence, they were always ignored – instead of only being nationally newsworthy if the a brown Muslim?

      There was also a school shooting several weeks ago that the media dropped once it came out that the shooter was the ex of the teacher he murdered along with some of her students.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Yeah, it’s boring if Muslims aren’t involved. I mean, deranged gunman are so commonplace now, that they don’t even make me shit my pants any ore like a good Muslim spree killing still does.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Wild Speculations, romaing free across the land.

    https://www.democraticunderground.com/10029161910

    I’m thinking he’s gonna be forced out via the 25th Amendment.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      My speculation is that Trump will launch a disastrous “Short, Victorious War” before July, and that the US has an armed insurrection starting before Christmas.

      • Covfefe

        Sure. Fine. Like that short, victorious war in Iraq.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          That’s why the term is in quotes, Hun. Trump reminds me more and more of the Argentine Junta on the eve of the Falklands War.

      • WotsAllThisThen

        So I should start making travel plans now, take an extended trip out of the country. Let me know when things calm down.

        • MynameisBlarney

          Think I’m gonna go see my kinfolk in Germany.

      • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

        RWNJs like to pretend they’re ready to pick up their Second Amendment boom sticks one day and overthrow the detested federal government. They write books about how easy and wonderful it will be. The Civil War was also going to be easy and wonderful. In my fantasy scenario, all the gun nuts get all their guns but cannot defeat a single modern battle tank.

        • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

          You say that now, but one of them may have a dick that is big. Then who’ll be laughing?

        • Wookie Monster

          But that’s only when democrats are in control. When republicans are in charge, even the mildest form of criticism of the government is treason.

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      He won’t go voluntarily.

      • Swampgas_Man

        At this point, what exactly would he have to do to FINALLY be considered 25th Amendment material?

      • Wookie Monster

        That’s the whole point of the 25th Amendment.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    I’m not watching that and you can’t make me.

  • laughingnome

    Maybe we should just ignore Trump all together and form a government in internal exile.

  • MynameisBlarney

    All these turmp minions would deny that the sky is in fact, blue.

    • smr

      Minion liblz

  • Bill D. Burger

    Kellyanne: “Just cauz’ Preznut’ Trump says or tweets something, that doesn’t mean it’s what he’s thinking. Just because he says it doesn’t mean that’s what he believes. Words can be used to say and mean anything. Everyone expects the Preznut’ words to mean something, and sometimes they do. Sometimes they are important and he is not responsible for you fake news reporters and the failing lamestream media not knowing when his words mean something….which sometimes they do….but not always.”

    https://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2017/05/10/636299782993471425-1443895696_I%20have%20no%20idea%20what%20you're%20saying%20to%20me.gif

    • SweetDeeKat

      You see, in the world of alternative facts, I’m not lying now even though what I say now is the opposite of what I said before. It’s a Phoenix Wright courtroom scene!

  • Electric Ukulele Land

    Look, just because Trump’s speaking directly to the people and bypassing the biased filter of the lamestream liberal media doesn’t mean he should be listened to.

  • proudgrampa

    Well, if it’s not Trump’s agenda, whose agenda is it???

    That just might be scarier, folks.

    • vivian

      Banannon.

  • timpundit

    So there are networks still giving this idiot air time? Sad.

  • JD Mulvey

    Yeah, “let’s talk about policy…”

    That’s when this shitshow gets even worse.

  • Daniel Hooper

    Of course, Wonkette is part of the lying liberal media who believes stupid things like facts and videotape. Conway said the president-elect uses social media; the President does not. They’re two totally different people who just have the same name, face, cheese doodle-esqe glow and are the same person. Get your facts straight!

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Also, there’s a guy named John Barron who speaks for the president, mainly about his sexual conquests. Nobody’s ever been able to get a picture of the guy, though.

    • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

      Maybe one is the agent and the other is the settler? Or one is the Idiot of the Legal Society and the other is uh, gold fringe on a flag?

  • hendenburg2

    Anyone know why so few posts have been written today?

    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Birthdays, personal holidays, traveling, the usual.

      • hendenburg2

        eh fair enough. gonna be a REALLY boring day at work then :-P

    • Mpeg

      Fewer posts (slightly) are my favorite times. That’s when ppl have to get extra creative (or just copypasta more GIF lulz, whichever). To me it’s like being stuck in the elevator between floors. One of you pulls off some juggling act, another fires off a missive and another refines a joke or steals one from a twitter-cahe stash. Holding flashlights to take turns psyching each other out til the power’s back on and the machine cogs grind again.
      This is what long intervals between posts reminds me of except in a real stalled elevator I would be hyperventilating and threatening anyone who touched me to slash them with needles from my sewing kit; all the rest is true though!

      • Les Appentis De la résistance

        and then somebody farts.

    • vivian

      Writer’s cramp? Writer’s block? Wikileaks? A conspiracy?

    • BigBoppa ~ Résistent

      Hitler. The answer is always Hitler.

    • ken_kukec

      The request for “unmasking” is in moderation?

  • Electric Ukulele Land

    White House: Donald Trump’s tweets are fake news!

  • Bill D. Burger
  • JerryRich

    Simply place Lewis Carroll and Franz Kafka in a blender and process for a few minutes. The result – KellyAnne!

    • eggsacklywright

      With a dash of Professor Irwin Corey.

  • OrG

    Oh sillyann, when you get burned by chuckles toad you have a problem.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Oh Smellyanne’ ___ everyone is on to you.

    http://thebitchywaiter.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/giphy.gif

  • canes_pugnaces

    Here’s a Bright Bart poster explaining global C02 levels. Maybe Trump will hire him/her: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8d094e46471b3665057e89e64d094f33b13ace73ab401f70b99ede2e85014819.png

    • canes_pugnaces
      • OrG

        Yeah,fire is good when you’re cooking, not so much when your house is on fire. Water is good when your house is on fire, not so much when you’re drowning. You’re welcome, stupid wingnut.

      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        Because NO substance vital for the maintenance of life can ever be bad for you under any circumstances.

      • Major_Major_Major

        It’s like nitrogen, that stuff is good for plants so I dump gallons of it on the garden. Goddamn neighbor must be jealous, cuz it looks like the fucker came along afterward and round-upped the shit out of it.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • Skwerl the Taco Hunter

      Right-wing cryfest in 5 – 4 – 3…

      • MynameisBlarney

        Followed by a boycott, lol.

  • President in Exile Firefly

    Stupid libtards–NOBODY speaks for the President!

    • Paperless Tiger

      And that goes double for himself.

      • vivian

        NOBODY MEANS NOBODY!

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    So his communications team are changing tactics. They can’t get the stupid son of a bitch to stop “covfefeing” himself publicly on Twitter, so now they just want us to pretend that his tweets are irrelevant, and that everyone should just ignore them. Call me crazy, but I don’t think it’s going to work. It does give an indication of how incredibly frustrating dealing with him must be. To borrow a description of Ed Muskie from Hunter Thompson, it must be a little bit “like being locked in a rolling boxcar with a vicious 200lb 300lb water rat.”

  • Bill D. Burger
    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      He’s mentally ill.

    • msanthropesmr

      And more 🏇 shit.

    • suziq

      Assumes there will be future to look back at “history”.

    • OddMan

      Bruce Bartlett had an interesting tweet this AM about mad kings in history. I think this list will now have one more to add. Our Dear Lord Dampnut™

      OT ish
      I thought it fascinating that so many mad leaders came from the period 1400 to 1700. I think it has something to do with lavish living with new unique materials made from heavy metals. Dyes, plates, spoons, cups, etc. Mad hatter’s disease for the wealthy. Just an off thought.

      https://twitter.com/BruceBartlett/status/871732915121606656

    • The story goes that, after Caligula was assassinated by his own guards, the Roman Senate debated whether to remove the horse from its rolls. One Senator allegedly remarked that, in that the horse took no bribes, gave no bad advice and never killed anyone, it was better than most Senators.

  • Vincent Ricola

    OT – Sarah Fucklebee Sanders? What happened to Spicy and when did we go back to live pressers with video instead of “live” pressers with only audio?

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Sanders: “can you please be respectful?”

      Me: “I’ll be as respectful to Trump as your father was to Obama and Clinton.”

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      CNN, MSNBC and (of course) Fox cover this live every day. But no questions are answered. It is not news; they are enabling the obfuscation. They should show reruns of “The West Wing” with CJ Craig doing “The Jackal” instead.

  • Lego Ezio

    OT: Donald Trump has announced a plan to privatize air traffic control. Prepare to travel by catapult, folks.

    http://www.npr.org/2017/06/05/531574945/trump-announces-plan-to-privatize-air-traffic-control

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I assume parachutes are extra?

      • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

        Those little breathing masks that come out of the ceiling totally also work as parachutes, and anyone telling you otherwise is lying. SAD!

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Because that’s a problem we didn’t know we had.

    • vivian

      Whew! This is a relief. In the airlines’ momentary hiatus in assaulting their customers I thought maybe, just maybe, airline travel could get a little better. This’ll put a stop to that.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Trebuchet Airlines boarding at gate 1.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      “Okay, so do you want point-to-point guidance for your flight? Well, that’s part of our Platinum Service package and you’re only a Gold member.”

    • vivian

      “Maybe if we built a giant wooden badger…”

    • HogeyeGrex

      Peasants aren’t supposed to travel anyway.

    • HogeyeGrex

      as he launches what the White House is calling the president’s “infrastructure week.”

      Oh, good Lord.

      http://stmedia.startribune.com/images/ows_138915403974787.jpg

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Speaking of lying liars who lie for Trump:
    “Environmental Protection Agency Administrator Scott Pruitt, appearing on This Week With George Stephanopoulos, casually asserted that the Trump administration has presided over a staggering increase in coal-industry employment. “We’ve had over 50,000 jobs since last quarter — coal jobs, mining jobs — created in this country. We had almost 7,000 mining and coal jobs created in the month of May alone,” boasted Pruitt.

    How false are these statistics? Extremely false.

    Last month, the coal industry added 400 jobs, not 7,000. Since October, it has added just 1,700 jobs. The industry as a whole now employs 51,000 people — total. (No, there were not merely 1,000 people working in coal before the election.)

    It is bizarre to design your country’s energy policy — which, even if you disregard climate science, has important implications for public health and international diplomacy — around the goal of maximizing jobs in an industry that employs fewer people than Arby’s. Even if “jobs” was the maximal priority of energy policy, the solar industry employs twice as many people. But, if you’re going to live in a fantasy world in which greenhouse gas emissions do not necessarily trap heat in the atmosphere, you might as well flesh out the fantasy with some imaginary jobs.”

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/06/scott-pruitt-is-as-wrong-about-coal-jobs-as-climate-change.html

    • Lefty Wright

      The most frightening thing is that Trump supporters will support these lies. Regardless of the total inanity of the claims. If there were only 25,000 jobs currently in an industry and Trump claimed he added 50,000 in just the last two days, they would stand behind it. Or claim the press misunderstood what he said. Even if you show a tweet or video of him saying it. I’m really at a loss on how to get through to these people. Maybe there is something going on with these chemtrail conspiracy ideas. How else could so many people be so stupid. And it’s mainly in fly over country. Because everyone knows that to get maximum dispersal of the drugs, you have to be at least at a 30,000 foot altitude.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        My neighbor believes that the unemployment numbers were 30% four months ago, but are 4% now. He REALLY believes that. All I can do is shake my head.

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Stupid, petty, jealous, venal…these are the people who internalized every time the teacher gave them an F, told them they weren’t trying their best, weren’t applying themselves, etc. and turned into a campaign to utterly wipe any form of intellect from the world so that NO ONE CAN EVER LOOK DOWN ON THEM EVER AGAIN!

        • Natalie

          I always wondered what happened to the kids who never paid attention in school, and actively resisted learning, well pretty much everything.

    • Cliff Hendroval

      Tesla and Arby’s both employ more people than the entire US coal industry.

  • proudgrampa

    So what if Trump isn’t really doing the tweeting? He could be a perfectly rational guy and just doesn’t know that someone is tweeting on his behalf?

    Naaaah.

    • vivian

      Bannon is the real tweeter, Trump is the beard.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Perhaps a new jacket could keep him from tweeting?

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DBkcmdjWAAA-1AM.jpg

    • Bill D. Burger
      • proudgrampa

        To all the impeachers: Be careful what you wish for.

        • Beowoof14

          As with Nixon where they got rid of Agnew first, getting rid of Pence first would be a good start.

          • But then you get Ryan…and then you get…(facepalm)

          • Indivisible Snark Tank

            Eventually, we get down to McMasters Mattis, who isn’t a complete dick, and almost relatively sane….

            Sorry, I is a Idiot.

          • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

            McMasters isn’t part of the succession line – National Security Advisor doesn’t count as it’s not a Senate-confirmed Cabinet post.

          • Indivisible Snark Tank

            DOH, mixing my Generals up. MATTIS, not McMasters.

          • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

            I thought you might have meant Mattis. I just didn’t want to presume.

          • I’m wishing for a Double Triple Impeachment.

          • “You guys have been on double-secret impeachment the entire first term!”

          • Notreelyhelping

            Can you say President Hatch?

          • Um, no, no I can’t.

          • BosGrl

            What if everyone down the line said NO NO DO NOT WANT?

          • HogeyeGrex

            This is why I’m resigned to the Republicans not doing fuck all until they lose Congress.

            President Pelosi should make for some splodey heads.

        • I’m wishing for a Double Impeachment.

          • Natalie

            Quadruple and that’s just the start. Let’s face it, they’re all evil.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        This dumb fuck was NOT going to get re-elected in Indiana. Let that sink in for a minute.

  • Anna Rompage

    I suspect next week KaC is going to be blaming Barron for stealing the Donad’s phone and posting the next barrage of abhorrent tweets…

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Beowoof14

    Dishonest, unhinged bullshit, has been the entire Trump Campaign and Presidency. The problem is his supporters have no idea that’s the case.

    • georgiaburning

      They know it,they accept it. Don’t waste your breath pointing it out to them.

      • Cat Cafe Honors Paris Accord

        It’s the language they speak.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • TakingAmes

      You win the internet today!

      • Jasmindjones

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !dp304c:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. Follow this link for more information
        !dp304c:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialCashJobs594MarketScanGetPaid$97/Hour ★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫::::::!dp304c:….,…….

    • alpacapunchbowl

      I am gonna be snork-laughing about this all afternoon!

  • georgiaburning

    There’s a method of negotiation where one side will alternate getting close to an agreement and then veering off to ask for something wild or expensive. It takes a brave team to look them in the eye and say f*ck you, assholes, get lost. Especially when there’s been a promise that a deal would get done. Donnie seems to have done a lot of real estate deals this way, why should he change?

    • Cat Cafe Honors Paris Accord

      Donnie has failed at a lot of negotiations that way, and doesn’t understand he might need to change. FIFY

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Crack_A_Toe_Ah

    KaC and Gorka would really hate this bot then — that takes Trump tweets and formats them as official presidential statements:
    http://boingboing.net/2017/06/05/this-is-not-normal.html

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Dudleydidwrong

      Oh, a contest. Three of the four pictures have something in common. One photo does not. Which photo doesn’t belong?

      “Uh, photo #3 doesn’t belong. The other three are of useful objects that are temporarily misplaced.”

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    We’re all agreed that Ivanka Trump is Lindsey Bluth right?

    https://media.giphy.com/media/MQ6EEGw08fovm/giphy.gif

  • Ilgattomorte

    “[T]his obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little of what he does as president”

    She’s right! We should stop listening to what he says and focus on what he has done as President. Ready …
    … golf.
    … meaningless executive orders.
    … lots of hand slaps from his wife.
    … gives classified information to Russians.
    … a healthcare bill that couldn’t pass gas, much less Congress.
    … pissed off most of Europe.
    … joined Syria and Nicaragua in the Climate Accord
    … ate a lot of overcooked meat and an untold number of french fries.

    Yep. It’s been a full and rich presidency.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Separated at birth.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DA9DXhqXUAAAGs5.jpg

    (*Sorry Mr. Pig. I know you’re actually smarter and more handsome. ~pig libelz~)

  • TakingAmes

    So, what SillyAnne is saying is that the administration would really prefer if we pay attention when they say so, fuck off when they say so, and ignore anything anyone else says. Got it. Well-rounded media diet they’ve got in mind for us right there.

  • Crystalclear12

    So, score to date:
    All news if fake because it reports what he says word for word.
    Twitter isn’t real.
    And his fucked executive order was correct the first time.
    I think he is ready for his participation ribbon.

    • Sally

      Ribbon? He needs a shiny gold trophy..and he needs to give back those gold watches the Saudis gifted his freakin’ family with!

  • YoBunnyBunny

    CUOMO: That is the policy. His tweets are the policy.

    GORKA: A hundred characters is not policy. It’s not policy.

    No shit. Now tell that to Trump.

    • Ill-Advised

      So, where does Trump speak ex cathedra, if not Twitter?

      • Nowhere. Anything Trump says is only to rile up the base and can be instantly denied whenever it becomes inoperative. Like all fascists, he uses speech only to destroy the possibility of dialogue.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Bill D. Burger
    • jesterpunk

      No they dont.

  • La forza del resistino

    ‘No policy, no policy, you’re the policy’
    If only we could wish.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • “It’s fake news. Fake news. I don’t know Twitter. Never been on Twitter. It’s sad really that you’re so focused on this Donald J. Trump person. Never heard of him. Am I responsible for what he says online? No. This is total Fake News. Now, if you excuse me, I have to tweet about how unfair the news media is to me.”

  • jesterpunk

    So now we cant take Trump’s words, tweets, or actions to represent what Trump actually thinks except when we can. Got it, he is a moron who voters for some stupid reason thought should be in charge of the country.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Because he had no experience! In the GOP brain, that’s a good thing.

      • Sally

        I have a sister who loves Trump’s “educated beautiful proud American wife who speaks FIVE languages,” unlike that Obama woman who pretended to by FLOTUS. (ya know, the one with one husband, who never modeled nude on a tourist visa, and earned a law degree?) She also loves his hard-working children who never were handed anything. My God, the delusional thinking is like half of America was brainwashed.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          She sounds like a friend of my mother’s. She’s a nice woman, but so fucking stupid it hurts. She could care less that Trump just settled a $24 million dollar fraud lawsuit, is under investigation for his fraudulent “charity,” stiffs his contractors, cheats on all of his wives, sexually assaults women, etc… She thinks he’s wonderful, while Obama was a horrible socialist Kenyan. Ayup, Fox News does a great job ingraining these idiots with bullshit.

  • William
    • NotReallyHere

      It’s the opera version of Randy Rainbow. Loved it! Thanks for sharing.

      • William

        I like to remind my conservative friends that Randy Rainbow and Ted Nugent share something in common. Neither will ever be in the rock and roll hall of fame.

    • Natalie

      Love this so much. It is great to see one of my favorite operas repurposed so cleverly.

  • Wellstone En Resistencia, Coño

    Someone needs to ask Kellyanne what it’s like when your boss uses more hairspray than you.

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • 3FingerPete

    That video makes it perfectly clear, with no room for spin or misinterpretation, that Sebastion Gorka owns a watch.

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      No way that was four minutes between him saying “eight minutes in” and “It’s been twelve minutes now.”

      • 3FingerPete

        and a minute later it jumped to twenty.

    • cmd resistor

      Wears a watch. He might have stolen it.

      • 3FingerPete

        You are absolutely correct. I was distracted by the FAKE NEWS flowing from that CNN guy’s lips.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Kellyanne Con-A-Way is what happens when you let the “my opinion is just as valid as your fact” crowd have their way with America.

  • Flashman

    I wonder if KAC is, even now, telling people she felt like washing after this particular round of defending Trump, as she did after the pussy-grab thing. That would be two baths in one year.

  • We need to come to the realization that facts don’t work on these fools. We need to start appealing to their emotion. Maybe do something like say “Obama says coal and pollution is good” or “Hillary secretly supports deporting illegals”. Damn now I think I just got myself a new website project.

    • jesterpunk

      They will still be for those things, remember they took the predator comment from the 90’s completely out of context to attack her.

    • merty

      I’m not sure about the reverse psychology but the appeal to emotion would/should work. Fwiw: The Obama admin did deport a lot of people which I will admit that I conveniently ignored.

  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    OT – I live in a pet friendly complex, and most of the pet owners are OK folks. I’d say 49 out of 50 of the dogs I encounter come right to me and say “hi”, dog-style. I might be winning hearts and minds among the neighbors just because dogs and cats like me.

    • Suse

      Dogs are good judges of character!

      • snigsy

        I was just about to say that, too.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        :)

    • OddMan

      I carry around little doggy treats in my pockets so I can say hi to any friendly muts I meet. Makes me smell good too, at least dogs think so.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      You have won lots of hearts and minds. We all like you!

  • Ricky Gay

    Even if we all did ignore his tweetgasms, they are his words written down and preserved and they undermine his presidency. That’s social media, Chris!

    • Ill-Advised

      Wallpaper for the Trump library. I want every tweet painted on the walls!

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    AP FACT CHECK: Attack draws visceral Trump tweets, not facts

    By CALVIN WOODWARD and JIM DRINKARD

    Today

    WASHINGTON (AP) — President Donald Trump can’t be counted on to give
    accurate information to Americans when violent acts are unfolding
    abroad.

    Goes without saying, but what matters here is that the Associated Press is saying it.

    https://www.apnews.com/079e907d81d14e7ca56eb5279f285f71/AP-FACT-CHECK:-Attack-draws-visceral-Trump-tweets,-not-facts?utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=AP_Politics

  • Jenny

    When there is a major terrorist attack here, our commander in chief will be happy to say I told you so, ban all the muslims.

    You know, instead of 1) preventing the damn thing 2) helping the victims.
    I’m pretty sure he won’t even be able to muster thoughts and prayers through his constant twitter gloating.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Somebody has to say it, particularly based on that picture: GO HOME, KELLYANNE! YOU’RE DRUNK!

  • Mary Theresa

    They can always hire this guy to get rid of Trumps twitting habits. He probably won’t care if he get stiffed on a contract either.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/08efdb877c66e30e7fb8426bc303f088bb3b2dfb3594497787d20d4b347fa693.jpg

    • Suse

      We want him to keep at it!

  • Suse

    Hucka-what-the-fuck is giving the presser right now.

    • snigsy

      Wearing her Lisa Simpson pearls. (Meow.)

      • Suse

        What the hell is that shirt/dress thing?

      • Suse

        I love my pearls. I wear them with jeans and a t-shirt.

        • snigsy

          Yes, and yours likely didn’t come from a Crackerjack box.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    This obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little what he does as President

    A president’s words are actions, Kellyanne. Ones with unfortunate consequences when it comes to this particular one FFS.

    • jesterpunk

      Lets cover his actions then, how about his low energy where he needs a golf cart to keep up with the rest of the G7 leaders? Or what about him shoving a leader out of the way to get to the front of the photo? What about him golfing every weekend with the Japanese PM that one time?

  • willi0000000

    THE PRESIDENT* WOULD NEVER USE SOCIALIST MEDIA!!!!!

    oh, nevermind.

  • MynameisBlarney
  • SadDemInTex

    I still don’t get why they can’t get him off Twitter. Nothing will alienate his base (about 30% of the voters…although I wonder what the real percentage would be if we had 80% turn out in elections instead of 45%). So why let him keep it? He’s not winning any new people with this shit.

    • Suse

      I think they’d be happy to get rid of him, honestly. Pence is more “tasteful.”

      • Meccalopolis

        He could destroy them obviously

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Why do they talk to her about anything?

  • SadDemInTex

    Idea: They stop the interview and loop back to her word salad and ask her to explain it.

    • Yellerduck

      Recursive word salad? You might end up with a black hole of blarney that would swallow the world.

  • Ilgattomorte

    “KELLYANNE CONWAY: For every time you’ve said Russia, imagine if you said ISIS. Every time you say Twitter, imagine if you said terrorist.

    Oooh! Gee Kellyanne. What a fun game! It’s kind of like MadLibs! Okay hear goes:

    “The president just can’t stay off of terrorists at 2AM”
    ISIS is suspected of arranging hookers to pee on Donald Trump, allegedly.”
    “Trump has over 2million terrorist followers.”
    “The President would love to meet with ISIS, maybe at a dinner at Mar-A-Lago and only if the first course has ISIS dressing on the side.”

    • Suse

      She’s lost her last marble.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    This is why all past presidents had handlers, speechwriters, the much maligned teleprompters. Every statement a president makes is newsworthy. Tweets are statements. If he can’t control his social media addiction, then maybe he should resign and just do social media full time, like he used to do before.

    • Meccalopolis

      Kinda like… Anthony Wiener

      • Yellerduck

        Perish the thought. Perish it right now. Oh, the visual.

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    The notion that we should ignore his tweets is fucking risible. The office of president is a leadership position, not a hands on one. Any president needs to set an agenda and use the tools available and his communications skills to advance that agenda with the public and legislators. Twitter is how Donnie has chosen to communicate, therefore people must evaluate those tweets on their merits, vis a vis how they illustrate his priorities and concerns. To say that they should essentially be ignored is like FDR’s staff telling people in the 1930’s that they should disregard his fireside chats.

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      Amen!

      We can’t just “ignore” it when the president of the United States tries to wage actual war via twitter. If the man can’t control his impulses, he shouldn’t be president.

    • snigsy

      Imagine Trump doing fireside chats.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        “It is unfair to point out that he set fire to the oval office.”

        • Graham Cracker

          Hell, he’s set fire to the country.

      • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

        This is a great fire – we’re making fire great again, believe me. I have the best people making fire, let me tell you, folks, just terrific. And we’ll have the best chat, just listen to me chat, I’m the best at chatting, and – listen the Pope thinks he know humble, but I can be even humbler, mostly because I don’t wear that hat, which he wouldn’t even let me – so let’s chat!

        • snigsy

          Hah!

      • miss_grundy

        It is bad enough to hear that stupid nasally voice of his on television with those idiotic gestures…..

        • snigsy

          Yes. I apologize! :)

        • snigsy

          Yes.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      This obsession with Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address is unfair.

      • Rags

        Not many people know he was a Republican…

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    i feel like evan erred (but only a little!) by not pointing out spicey too sometimes says, “the tweet speaks for itself” when asked about one.

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      It’s all bullshit with them. They’re trying to create this world that doesn’t exist in which the man and his social media are totally separate and never overlap. I’m waiting for them to start spinning a third president who is neither the public nor the social media persona.

      Maye that’s what Hope Hicks was trying to sell.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        “the person, the traveller, and the corporation”…or however it goes.

        • willi0000000

          which one of those was Randall Flagg?

      • merty

        It’s the Deep State! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

  • Mehmeisterjr

    George Conway could not be more of a troll if he lived under a bridge and tried to eat the Billy Goats Gruff. And yet:

    1. He just rejected a shit sandwich job in the Justice Department and…

    2. then twitted a tweet, more in sorrow than in anger, regretting that BLOATUS once again gave away the game about the Travel Ban that Cannot Say Its Name Except that Trump Keeps Saying Its Name.

    Some say that he is trying to get Skellatrix fired before the subpoenas start flying in earnest.

    • Are we there yet?

      Better to just throw some water on her so she melts.

      • Granny Sprinkles

        What a world what a world.

      • Mary Theresa
        • Mehmeisterjr

          She’s going to have to settle for rat fur.

          Or an orange jump suit.

          • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

            Orange is the new Dalmatian?

        • Nah. Cruella was fantastic evil. KAC is not.

          • 27 more rats, then

          • Natalie

            They won’t be hard to find in the Whitehouse. Any of her teammates would do.

      • BeachBum

        I would use holy water just for the shits and giggles .

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        You think she would have gotten the hint when someone dropped that house on her sister.

    • cmd resistor

      Then he had to tweet some suck up stuff about how much he supports trump and of course his wonderful wife. Ok whatever

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Ha, ha! He just missed the first Billy Goat Gruff.

    • Mary Theresa

      But who can decipher her witness testimony? It would tie up the court system for years.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        I’d love to hear her under real cross-examination.

        She’d be in line for ten felony convictions inside of ten minutes.

        • Yellerduck

          No, she’d just keep talking until everyone in the court and everyone watching became a catatonic drooling vegetable, then walk off with the judge’s wristwatch and call it a day.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Hubby knows perjury is a criminal act and not a lifestyle choice.

    • Meccalopolis

      Skellitrix! That’s awesome

    • Natalie

      I’m stealing skellitrix, may it go viral.

  • Suse

    They’re asking where Sean is and she’s spinning it for all she’s worth.

    • willi0000000

      he’s looking for a shrubber.

      • Rags

        Ni!

  • OddMan

    So Kellyanne just said we are not supposed to pay attention to communication from the President on Twitter, because . . . something.
    Spicer just last week said that, “Ultimately, the best messenger is the President himself.”
    But back in February Sean said, “I Speak For The President”

    Damn with all this who is speaking for whom and what should we listen to, I’m beginning to think these folks don’t know their butts from a whole in the ground.

    • willi0000000

      their butts are the ones smoking . . . wait . . . i’m not sure i meant to say it that way.

      • Ill-Advised

        Uh-huh. Su-u-re you didn’t.

    • Robert James Nugent

      This why KA Corncob should never appear. She has zero credibility. Even her husband thru her under the bus.

    • miss_grundy

      Ding-Ding-Ding-Ding-Ding! Right you are, sir!

  • Lyly Sirivong

    So that’s the new strategy. They can’t vet his tweets (yet), so they tell us they don’t reflect his views. Soon they’ll be telling us the same thing for his speeches.

  • bluicebank

    You know, not even Yosemite Sam shot his own foot when he went on a tirade.

    Which puts this crazed gunman as a more sane choice to have in the White House.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B12eVCBbGsw

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    This obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little what he does as President

    Just WHAT THE FUCK has he done?

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Cheated at golf.

      Ate a piece of “the greatest” chocolate cake in the world.

      Fell asleep at the keyboard.

      • willi0000000

        . . . gave secrets away like they were free samples at the grocery store.

    • BeachBum

      Trumper voters in WI,MI,OH and PA will be getting their Chinese Factory Jobs any day now !

      • mailman27

        We’re bring back COAL!!1!!!

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      He knocked covfefe out of the park, I tell ya!

    • Maclare

      Insulted multiple world leaders?

    • Poorly Behaved Pérsistanista

      Offered to transfer air traffic control and 30,000 federal employees to a not-for-profit company? (Not-for-profit my ass.)

    • miss_grundy

      He has pissed off every world leader worth a damn and has made the United States look like a laughingstock. We used to try to be the gold standard–or at least talked about being the gold standard for a democratic government. Now we just look like a third-rate dictatorship.

    • Ill-Advised

      Signed eleventy billion executive orders, none of which are enforceable?

    • HooverVilles

      Look the other way and don’t see,
      1) disappearing health care
      2) privatization of the ATC
      3) …

  • thewalkindude

    Virtually every single poll tracking President Donald Trump’s approval rating showed the figure plummeting Monday morning, well below the margin of error compared to the rising level of support for impeachment. The results follow Trump’s controversial decision to withdraw the United States from the Paris climate accord; the ongoing investigation into his campaign’s possible ties to the Kremlin is also a factor.

    • Courser_Resistance

      May this regime go down in fucking flames! Survivors go directly to prison, do not pass GO, do not collect a fucking dime.

      • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

        And asset forfeiture for what they have collected in the past!

    • miss_grundy

      His administration cannot go down in flames fast enough or hard enough to cause a sonic boom. Everyone involved in this administration needs to lose any possibility of ever making money ever again.

    • Once&futureFred

      Let me guess, after all of that plummeting he’s still at about 40%, right? You read about plummeting polls but the numbers don’t ever change. I guess “plummeting” means staying suspiciously high.. How nearly half of the people polled can think he’s doing a good job is beyond me, what world do they live on?

      • Rags

        June 3 Gallup says 36%. He may be losing the Fringe of his ‘base’

        • merty

          The interviews I’ve seen/read with trump voters the common sentiment seems to be that they wish he tweeted less.

  • mardam422

    Pay no attention to that man behind the Twitter account!!!

  • Courser_Resistance

    That was the best ‘Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain…’ reply I’ve heard in a long time.

    • Maclare

      Didn’t work in Oz either!

  • chicken thief

    “KELLYANNE CONWAY: For every time you’ve
    said Russia, imagine if you said ISIS. Every time you say Twitter,
    imagine if you said terrorist. Maybe we’d have a different type of
    vigilance.”

    After that nonsense I can only imagine John Lennon spinning in his grave.

    • Yellerduck

      So, now there’s a supposed Trump/ISIS connection, and Trump is an avid terrorist user?

      • Boscoe

        That’s what I took away from Kelly’s comments too.

    • snigsy

      Nothing to kill or die for
      And no religion too.

    • John Resistant Tovarich Smith

      “Imagine there’s no Russia…”

      • Sarah E. Grove

        “Imagine there’s no Trump .. . .. “

  • Lyly Sirivong

    Oh, it’s not us or the journalists who are obsessed with Trump’s twitter. It’s him. Can you imagine the tantrum he’d throw if no one paid attention to what he tweets ? He lives for the atention.

    • BeachBum

      He’s not getting any thing done . Congress passed 0. Twitter is all he has .

  • Robert James Nugent

    If he wants “unfiltered” contact with the public, he needs to live with the consequences.

    • miss_grundy

      Let him walk unaccompanied by Secret Service on 5th Avenue. I am sure Manhattanites have a few things they would like to say to the orange shitgibbon.

  • WHY IS SEBASTIAN GORKA STILL A THING!??!

    • snigsy

      Why was he ever a thing?

    • JustDon’tSayCovfefe

      I can not-see why either.

    • puredog

      Never a human, always a “thing.” Same old same old.

  • norcalOG

    She hasn’t been the same since she came face to face with Bowling Green terrorist, Abdul Vinny Voom Vas, while she was caring for the wounded.
    Fortunately, Voom Vas was taken down before he could harm her or others. Even the possibility of a presidential medal has not aided her recovery.
    God speed, Kelly Ann.

    • Are we there yet?

      Wait a minute — who did that to her face then?

  • Phil

    This is some beautiful wordsmithing.

    “So what the fuck is this latest nattering horseshit from the president’s most enthusiastic spokes-liar?”

  • ken_kukec

    Since Trump fancies himself “the Hemingway of Twitter,” shouldn’t spokes-liars like Conway and Gorka instead be out there explicating the “iceberg theory” of tweet interpretation?

    • you misunderstood him. He meant Englebert Hemmingway, Ernest’s lesser known second cousin on his father’s side.
      Who wrote limericks.

      • Boscoe

        …in crayon, on the side of his crib.

    • katahdin

      To be fair, Trump thinks that Hemingway was great because he was popular and sold a lot of books.
      He made so much money!

    • merty

      Yes! #covfefe!

  • So the Trumpers are now admitting that Trump is NOT just saying what everyone is thinking and NOT just speaking the truth to the American people?

    • HooverVilles

      ->Rinse and repeat->
      |<—————————<|

  • Remember when, off the cuff, in a fit of frustration, Obama said something about people clinging to their guns and bibles, and the right freaking went NUTS and screamed about accountability and he said it! HE SAID IT HE MUST BELIEVE IT ZOMG JADE HELM

    • HooverVilles

      Just like when Michelle Obama wore a sleeveless dress and the RWNJ’s heads went all esplody, but Melania posed nude, in thong with gun, and etc and all we heard from the RWNJ was the sound of crickets chirping.

      IOKiffYAR, where iff = if and only if.

      • merty

        Because we’re feminists and supposed to be ok with it, and definitely not think it’s just a little awkward that anyone with internet access can see the First Lady’s oiled up boobs (they’re real and they are spectacular!). But she is just the picture of CLASS and thank god we finally have a CLASSY lady back in the White House (who doesn’t live there really but that’s whatever.) We should all aspire to this! If we are at all critical it just means we’re jealous!

        Tangent: this nudity thing really gets me. Yes if you decide to pose nude and make money from it, great! Good for you and your confidence! I’m an American with deeply ingrained puritanical tendencies and I have trouble even walking around in a swimsuit sometimes. I suppose Mel has a more free spirited European mentality because they are pretty ok with being nude in public. I think that’s a great attitude, but I honestly can’t wrap my brain around the fact that people who are way more conservative than me are totally fine with nude lesbo photos of FLOTUS. I mean, are these the same people who would say if you wore a tight dress and were raped that you asked for it? Or that girls need to follow a strict dress code at school because shorts and tank tops are distracting to boys?

        • HooverVilles

          Exactly! Their own personal interpretation of bronze age/iron age writings take presidence over our laws and over other person’s interpretation of bronze age/iron age writings.
          Sigh!

  • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

    Kust keep reading Drudge, Mr. Prexy. And put some more butter on that steak, by all means.

    • miss_grundy

      He puts ketchup on his leathery steak. He needs to keep eating more KFC and drinking more Diet Coke.

      • davidhollenshead

        nah, the CIA needs to add a little heart medication to Führer Trump’s cocaine, for national security. Of course they can only do it when he is not in the US, but that should not be hard.

  • Run2Live

    42 secs into the interview, Gotka says “8 minutes into this interview.”
    2 minutes into the interview, Gotka glances at his watch and says “20 minutes into this interview.”
    I guess it feels like an eternity when you’re getting your ass handed to you on national television.

    • Boscoe

      Or his dedication to “facts” and “accuracy” reflect those of his boss…

  • HazooToo

    I am so confused. Are the tweets the squirrel, or is Russia the squirrel, or is health care the squirrel? Are ALL of the scandals squirrels? And if so, are all of the squirrels equally devastating and evil?

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      One way or another, too many damn squirrels.

    • Charon_69

      It’s squirrels all the way down…

      • davidhollenshead

        Not Turtles ???

        • HooverVilles

          Ruh Roh. Somebody better tell Franklin Graham.

        • Sarah E. Grove

          Nah. The turtle is the head-in-asshole of the Senate, but only unto January 1st, 2019.

    • Boscoe
      • phoenix00

        …. ZZ Top?

      • Sarah E. Grove

        Is that Drumpf, Pence, Bannon & Kushner?

    • Ill-Advised

      They’re Secret Squirrels! As ACORN will no doubt testify.

    • phoenix00

      No squirrel. No squirrel. You’re the squirrel.

  • JParkerSD46

    Jeezis H. Crispycrackers, I know it’s all about ratings, but why do these blab-fests have to keep bringing in Conway and idiots like SS Obergruppenfurher Gorka. Yes, they make great tv and entertaining “dialogue” and sound bites, but c’mon.

    • Erala Contratista

      Not great tv…..

      Although I don’t watch tv any more.

  • bookish

    Jeez, KAC, do you ever just listen to yourself?

    • miss_grundy

      If she did, she would be drinking.

      • davidhollenshead

        out of a plastic whiskey bottle with Steve Bannon.

  • miss_grundy

    Well, he doesn’t want to have pressers because the MSM are into “fake news”. So, if he is going to tweet his thoughts what are we to make of them other than policy that he wants to institute under his administration. Because he and his staff sure aren’t working on anything. Well–he’s working on his golf game.

    • Ill-Advised

      I wish he’d work on his handicap.

      I’ll see myself out.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        comment of the day!

      • Sarah E. Grove

        On his handicap? It seems a lobotomy would be his “cure”

  • akryan

    Why is she still brought on television? It’s painful to watch.

    • Husband Of Mrs God

      How does she go so long without fresh air?

      • Rags

        How does she go so long IN fresh air.

        • Sarah E. Grove

          How can fresh air stand to be around her?

  • Marla

    Is Lady Skeletor here slowly Photoshopping her way out of this farce of an administration?

  • Paperless Tiger

    This business of second guessing the President is tiresome, but God forbid anyone should take him literally. In his case, confusion is an improvement.

  • Ill-Advised

    See, this makes my head hurt. How does the White House have an agenda that isn’t the president’s?

    • davidhollenshead

      The agenda is trying to prevent people from focusing on Führer Trump’s real agenda, building his “Forth Reich” and creating a new insanely wealthy class, by making us wage slaves.

      • Ill-Advised

        I didn’t code for the snark font, but that’s OK.

        I don’t think he’s as interested in a fourth Reich as he is in creating a group of people who HAVE to recognize him as #1.

        Wage slavery, we already have. Forbes observed last year that 63% of Americans don’t have enough savings to pay bills if their income is interrupted.

    • merty

      He’s a puppet!

  • Hoon Seong Teo

    Lying sure ages one

    • davidhollenshead

      Kelly Stupid Bitch Conway is actually a 598 year old witch, who uses the blood and souls to the children she sacrifices to Satan, to preserve her “youthful beauty”.
      That is why she is so into Führer Trump’s detention of undocumented teenagers.

      • Zyxomma

        598 year old witch LIBELZ!!!1!!1!

      • LeighBowery’sLuxuryComedy

        Hey hey hey. Don’t blame her on us witches now. We have as little to do with that unwrapped animated mummy as we do with Satan, which is to say, nada, zero, zilch.

    • phoenix00

      KAC’s face is simply a reflection of what lies inside.

      • merty

        I imagine it’s a human-sized vacuum cleaner bag full of hair and spiders.

        • phoenix00

          Except worse

  • unclejeems

    Policy: Any statement, written or spoken by an official, and backed by the authority of the policy-maker. Yep, sounds like policy to me.

  • davidhollenshead

    “an attack on London is an attack on American Values” — Kelly Stupid Bitch Conway

    So when our Führer Trump attacked Mayor Sadiq Khan, for being Muslim, Führer Trump was attacking our American Values of Decency.
    Thanks Kelly, that was the first thing you said in a very long time that was neither a lie, defection or other form of spin.

    On behalf of our family, which includes four Muslim relatives in the greater London area, I would like to say, this is looking more and more like Führer Trump and his Brownshirts like Kelly Stupid Bitch Conway, want their Forth Reich.
    Next we will probably have something similar to the faked Polish attack on a German Radio Station by members of the Nazi party.

    • Rickyphoo

      That is my fear. People like trump are the most dangerous when they are wounded and cornered. The only ray of hope is if his administration did pull off a false flag incident, trump would get on Twitter and brag about it.

  • Johnny Appleseed

    When is Policy not Policy?

    These aren’t alternate facts.

    Mr President of the Republicans, either mean what you say or step down because you sound like a lying ahole and the whole world believes it!

    • davidhollenshead

      I think you are being very unfair to “lying assholes”.

      • Johnny Appleseed

        (Good) point taken.

  • azeyote

    when you are debating Gorka there is no bottom in sight –

  • Doug Langley

    Give the poor woman a break. It’s probably her day off:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zjbc15X1zSM

    • Rickyphoo

      Very funny and I’ll bet pretty close to reality. The only thing wrong with the skit is Kellyanne and her husband wish they looked that good.

  • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

    “[T]his obsession with covering everything he says on Twitter and very little of what he does as president …”

    Sending out Tweets IS what he does as president. Why do you think you spend your entire day defending what he said on Twitter, you stupid bitch?

    • davidhollenshead

      “Why do you think you spend your entire day defending what he said on Twitter”

      — for the money and power.
      But she is clearly a bitch, only not stupid, which makes her more dangerous.

  • Delu

    Perhaps there would be far less obsession with covering everything Trump says on twitter if Trump simply says far less on twitter.

    Did this ever occur to Kellyanne?

  • Zyxomma

    This so-called administration is in free fall without parachutes. Let’s hope we can prevent Dictator Tot from taking the rest of us down with him.

  • Rags

    What is to stop Scotus from asking ” you needed 120 days. The ban has no effect on your ability to implement ‘extreme vetting.’ so why are you before us now?”

    • davidhollenshead

      What is to stop the SCOTUS from finding Führer Trump and a few of his Brownshirts guilty of treason, thus ending their appeals ????

      • Rags

        We can but hope.

  • Shawn Renee Ernoehazy

    Well, that was infuriating. I wish I could ask my deceased Hungarian father in law his thoughts on this asshole. It seems the cousins in the old country (from what I can gather, the translate function is weak for Hungarian) have become very nationalistic and isolationist, it seems this is a pattern there.

  • Stulexington

    You can’t say “oh don’t listen to him” about the guy in charge, it doesn’t work that way. Lets for a moment pretend he’s the CEO because that’s what you ignorant douchbags want to think we should pursue: When the CEO speaks, he speaks for the company. Every Goddamn time! When the President speaks he speaks for the Executive branch of United States federal government. Every Goddamn time!

    Everything his says is policy that’s why he’s suppose to mind every Goddamn thing he says all the fucking time and we will not let him run his fucking mouth without calling him on it! He doesn’t get special consideration, he will be held to the standards the office demands.

    • Weird Fishes

      The President speaks for The United States of America. His clown college of advisors speak for the Executive Branch, because if it wasn’t for him they would be even more unemployable than they are now.

      So yes, pay attention. Pay lots and lots of attention. Lots of it. Lots.

    • merty

      YES. He now speaks as America’s “brand” and he of all people should understand that.

      Not only that, but his behavior is shaping the internal culture of the administration. We can all see how bad and dysfunctional that is from the outside. His handlers can’t control him, and they’re all saying different things because he obviously doesn’t communicate with them. They say listen to his tweets! Everything else is fake news and alt facts! They say don’t listen to his tweets, try to understand what is in his heart! (Be psychic!)

      This is some gaslighting bullshit is what it is. We’re supposed to interpret all this shit to mean whatever we want it to mean, but if we disagree we will always be wrong, because “that’s not what he meant!” So it’s great for 45’s fan base but terrible for people who can think critically. So then we’re all wasting time trying to make sense of things, which will never make sense, meanwhile our government is imploding at the hands of the Republicans.

      Corporate culture is the one thing that does trickle down, or more accurately for 45, the shit rolls down hill. And he is at the top of the hill shitting a lot.

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  • William

    While you libruls were bitching about every little thing , real ‘Muricans were celebrating the President signing a piece of paper that would mean something and be a rule or something if it weren’t for the Constitution and stuff….. and look, just look at the diversity here. A CANADIAN CUBAN fer Christs sake. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2e403ea07e574caba1f04e8381db69d3d9b00c2c9c933ae8ef802ef7b7981f58.jpg

  • Laffing Crow

    This is what happens when you speak for the unspeakable. You look like the cynical, utterly corrupted dumbfuck that you are. Over and over and over and…..

  • Laffing Crow

    Huckabee Sanders cracked me up yesterday. She came camo dressed to leap into the flower bushes with Spicey if the occasion called for it.

  • sonaliraq

    Dear Prez Fuckwad, Like Sadiq Khan, I also think you’re a total douchebag. With all due respect (i.e. none),
    Theresa May

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    So, and I just want to be clear here, anything I say on social media, I should get a pass for? Really? Because SOME sites have comment policies that are super restrictive when it comes to certain comments I would like to make about certain people like Kellyanne, Teh Donny, Sebastian the Gork, &c. Which is fair, or not, depending on the length of time since my last caffeine hit.

  • Heyzeus Ahchay

    Damn it — Kellyanne slipped the collar and got out of the double-wide again.

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