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The Washington Post has ruined our Friday night AGAIN, this time with news that Jared Kushner, the 36-year-old real estate developer son-in-law of President Donald Trump, when secretly meeting with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak and then declining to list it in his security background check forms, asked the Russian ambassador to let Trump transition officials use secure channels inside the Russian embassy to have secret talks with Vladimir Putin.

The nation’s elderly fathers were furious.

“Who does this 35-year-old fucking punk with his 600 million dollars think he is, parading around with Russia and thinking he’s going to beat the FBI,” old dads, 79, scoffed into the telephone to their daughters, the editrix of the nation’s premier mommyblog and recipe hub. The nation’s fathers do not care for little fucking punks with $600 million.

“He’s not very smart,” the nation’s daughters explained to their elderly fathers, before regaling them with tales of Jared Kushner’s badness at real estate, and why that badness at real estate necessitates an infusion of capital, which dovetails nicely with the meeting set up by Sergey Kislyak for Jared Kushner and a Russian bank, Vnesheconombank (VEB), which is under US sanction. Also, the nation’s daughters reminded their dad, Donald Trump too also is not very good at real estate. “So where’s all his money from,” the nation’s dads asked. “Do you really think it’s all just from the Russian mob?”

Yes. Yes the nation’s daughters do. Plus a little light fraud here and there.

The nation’s daughters forgot to add that the documentation revealed by the Post also confirmed that Kushner and the disgraced then-future/now-former National Security Adviser, Mike Flynn, arranged with Kislyak the secret January meeting in the Seychelles between a Russian emissary and scary weirdo mercenary and brother of Betsy DeVos Erik Prince, formerly of Blackwater, but in their defense the nation’s dads are super deaf and they have to yell the whole time they’re on the phone.

In other breaking news, the Senate Intelligence Committee has asked the Trump campaign to “gather and produce all documents, emails and phone records going back to his campaign’s launch in June 2015.” We’re sure they’ll get right on it.

[WaPo / WaPo]

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  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    They aren’t just dirty grifters, they aren’t just Treasonous assholes, they are So shit-stoopid they couldn’t pour piss out of a Boot if the heel had “You are an Awesome Rich Guy” printed on the heel.

    • jaspersdad

      Amateurs.

    • Ill-Advised

      Couldn’t manage their way out of a brown paper bag with both ends open and instructions on the inside.

  • Hey, remember all those folks at Trump’s rallies chanting “Create Secret Back Channels to Russia” over and over…

  • Count Awesome

    I’m surprised he didn’t try to have a red phone built into a bust in his house a la the Adam West “Batman”.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      That was the batpole reveal switch.

      (Cranky old man who saw it on first run)

      • Count Awesome

        I stand corrected.

        • FlownΩver

          If you had a batpole you could slide corrected.

  • Joe Beese

    The optics are… sub-optimal.

  • Steven R Freedman

    Smoke a doob and try to pronounce Vnesheconombank. Impossible.

    • Joe Beese

      I’m drunk as a skunk on Evan Williams White and I wouldn’t even attempt it.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I think “kompromat” is probably a bit tough under those circumstances, too.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      I don’t smoke, but it’s “Venishee-CON-om-bahhnk.”

    • AmusedAmused

      It’s a compound word. Russian is a synthetic language. Break the word down into its building blocks, and pronunciation becomes easy.

      VNESH
      eko-NOM
      BANK

      “External Commerce Bank” (Hey, it’s actually shorter in Russian.)

      Three components, each accented, but without pauses. “Ekonom” has the accent on the second syllable.

      See? Piece of cake.

      • msanthropesmr

        Ted Koppel is a waffle.

      • Jon Sussex

        Those cakes we like?

      • AmusedAmused

        Bliny with sour cream and honey.

    • Just smoking some bowls of Legal Oregon Lemon Diesel.

      Let me try. Vnesh… c’mon…Who puts a V and and an N together. VvvvvNNNN

      Vegan.
      Yep. Vegans. They eat weird food.

      Hmmm.
      Need some Doritos…

      • NellCote71

        Asshole, said the Texan. We will never have nice things.

      • m3bosha

        Hybrid Agent O and leftover enchiladas over here. Enough indica to make you hungry and enough sativa so you can still do word puzzles. But Vnesh-something-something-bank? No.

  • cheetojeebus

    Here’s video evidence of Kushner using said back channel.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kv3kcnI72Ec

    • MAXWELL SMART LIBELZ!!!

      • Swampgas_Man

        Missed by thaaaat much.

    • Count Awesome

      Trump really needs to invest in a cone of silence.

      • cheetojeebus

        two scoops with jimmies.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        *what?*

        I said…

        *WHAT?*

        • John Thorstensen

          Yo Anna — Totally O/T but thought you’d be amused. A former student of mine went into the army and ended up training as a tank commander. He said that an M1-A1 can be blasting along across rough ground and when you throw the stabilizer switch on the gunsight, it becomes eerily steady, and you can take out an enemy at 2000 yards or more.

          I like time-travel fantasies, one of which is dropping a couple hundred of these into the battle of the Kursk Salient, on the Russian side, wiping out those effing Nazis, and vanishing into what my French Canadian colleague referred to as “Tin Hair” when the job was done.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Nice! I knew a guy was in a M1A1 Heavy Common in Desert Storm, they took a hit on the turret from an Iraqi T-72, and all it did was knock a few circuit breakers out and damage their hearing. He switched from Thermal to optic sight, and destroyed the T-72.

            Even a company of M1A1s or A2s at Prokorovka would annihilate the Germans. Even a Tiger 1 couldn’t hurt an M1 frontally.

          • JCfromNC

            My son rides in one of those for the NC National Guard, and he is very fond of it. Fortunately, he hasn’t had to participate in anything more than mock combat so far, but who knows? A trip to Korea might be in his future at this rate.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    I think this leak came to WaPo from Bannon. The Night of the Long Knives is coming.

    • natoslug

      We certainly hope so.

    • rebecca

      I think so too.

    • NellCote71

      Me too. The most Cheneyesque in the monkey house.

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      The hot rumor is England. Good old fashioned British revenge for the Manchester leak and hating and mistrusting Trump in general.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    This guy really needs to rethink his entire life and start using the death sticks he’s selling.

  • Michael R
  • SayItWithWookies

    I know Assmouth believes most laws make an exception for the president — but will the rest of the White House staff have to register as foreign agents? And if so, how will Paul Ryan rationalize his slathering, sickly-sweet adulation this time?

  • msanthropesmr

    Wow.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Is it too much to ask for competent evil?

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Like the Tal Shiar?

      • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

        Right now I’d settle for The Heirarchy

    • natoslug

      I’m more than happy with incompetent evil. If these fucks had brains, the damage would be much worse by now.

      • NellCote71

        I have to hand it to Cheney–and I never thought I would ever write those words–he would not have put up with such amateur stupidity.

        • Noxious Resistance

          Interesting how quiet Dick’s been lately.

        • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

          Exactly. Say what you want about Dick Cheney but he was smart and competent. Evil, sure, but not stupid or incompetent.

    • jesterpunk

      Like W and Cheney?

    • snark-lurker

      Nuttin matters until somebuddy with cuffs puts’em on sumbuddy evil.

    • rebecca

      would President Pence do?

    • “M”

      That’s okay. As long as they get carried out of there with Title 18 hanging over their heads like the French guillotine, I’m totally okay with incompetent evil.

      Otherwise we get Teapot Dome II and natural resources and U.S. reserves handed over to the robber barons — which I believe this fine media source reported is exactly what 45 is planning — for pennies on the dollar.

      And I am emphatically NOT okay with that.

    • NellCote71

      Apparently.

  • Electric Ukulele Land

    Asking the Russian ambassador to use Russian communication equipment to establish a secret communications channel to Russia is exactly the sort of out of the box thinking I’d expect from someone who doesn’t really understand what he’s doing as he tries to commit treason.

    • ThunderCat

      Or maybe his data plan with AT&T is out of minutes.

      • Joycejprendergast

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      • Goldiemdupree

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !dq16c:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. Follow this link for more information
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    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      He knew enough to know that official channels would be monitored by the FBI, CIA, and NSA. You can’t really commit treason properly if the American and European spooks are listening. His screw-up was telling somebody who’s constantly under electronic surveillance.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Clearly, someone needs to body slam WaPo, because I’m sure Drumpf and Co are sick of their shit.

    EDIT: lololololololol #schadenfreude

    • AmusedAmused

      You know, light slamming is getting old. To keep their base voting conservatives will pretty soon have to start dismembering journalists on stage.

      • H0mer0

        [don’t give them ideas. They already expressed admiration of the Saudis and Erdogan’s suppression of dissent and protest.]

        • SayItWithWookies

          Don’t forget actual murderer Ronaldo Duterte.

      • “M”

        I believe Governor Greg Abbott from TX already suggested that.

        So ..
        don’t give them ideas, I’m thinking?

  • cheetojeebus

    This is slightly more fun than a dozen pics of tiny kittens.
    https://twitter.com/bobcesca_go/status/868227320984682496

    • m3bosha

      Day whiskey is a magical thing.

    • thixotropic jerk

      #MAGGA!!!! Make Assholes Get Gobsmacked Again

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Hold crap. It’s a metaphor for the whole fucking mess, isn’t it?

      • Shibusa

        Pole=#Resist!

    • mancityRed6

      I feel so sorry for that dog.
      “I know I’m supposed to love you unconditionally, but…seriously…you’re an ass.”

      • Gayer Than Thou

        Lassie is all “Oh, careful – there’s a … eh. You’ll find out.”

    • NellCote71

      Played over and over.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Latest pole results?

    • armed_bears

      This country needs more light poles.

    • Kiri the Unicorn

      What really makes Trump voters mad is having witnesses to their stupid acts.

    • Opalescent Riddles

      He ran a dogged campaign but faced defeat at the poles.

      • cheetojeebus

        FTW!!11

    • Snopes Shop

      thank u

    • Gets angry at someone else for forcing him to rant and rave (about Hillary, no doubt) and not pay attention to where he was walking. Just shows how evil LIEbrals are by just existing!

  • boyblue122

    Even the Russians were surprised at how dumb Kushner’s plan was

    https://twitter.com/DanEggenWPost/status/868242935137148932

    • bookish

      Amateur hour.

    • Suse

      A Russian with scruples? Unpossible!

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        Scruples? Doubtful. Smart enough to know that the conversation was probably being monitored and that even if it weren’t, any back channel would eventually be discovered and look really bad? Yeah.

  • SayItWithWookies

    In slightly o/t news, Mick Mulvaney says the White House will comply with the Office of Government Ethics’ request for their waivers of lobbying rules. Walter Shaub 1, Assmouth 0.

    • Mike Steele

      Yeah, I can hear it now: “SEE? And you say we never turn over any documents.” I hate Mulvaney more than the Dumbkopf – carry on, Walter.

      • Lot_49

        You’ve got to hand it to the tRump transition team: they did their damn best to find cabinet members even more irritating than the prez himself.

  • Thiazin Red

    Hey, we DID have Trump scandal reveal time today!

  • Chadwells

    A sawbuck for you! BUY MORE WINE!!

    • rebecca

      ON IT.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    I can hear the shredders from here. I can smell their motors burning out. I can already hear Fucks Gnus gasbags proclaiming, optimistically, that there’s “no evidence.”

    I can also smell the fear. It smells like . . . victory.

    • John Thorstensen

      I joke with our department administrators that the shredder they use should really be a “Fawn Hall Signature Model”.

    • Count Awesome

      They had to bring the semi truck to shred into a trailer.

  • PigDootsMolloy
    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Hah. Anybody recall that they were hijacked to the ancestral home of the Trump clan, Vulgaria?

  • bookish

    I’m totally with the nations’ dads on this one.

  • Picabo

    Car 54 Where Are You? I am an old.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5MkCAwupe0

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      You’re an oldz if “Idlewild” doesn’t make you stop and scratch your head.

      • NellCote71

        Much less Khrushchev. Shoe pounding, anyone?

        • Suse

          He scared the hell out of me when he did that. Also when he said, “We will bury you!”

          • NellCote71

            Yeah, me too, as I was peering between my fingers while under the desk, during nuclear war drills.

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        I did have to look that one up.

    • John Thorstensen

      An acquaintance of mine — who would have been a classmate had I gone to another school — and who wrote the definitive software package for extracting stellar magnitudes from astronomical images — pointed out that one can date that theme very closely from internal evidence, namely “Kruschev’s due at Idylwild”.

    • Suse

      I loved it when Gunther’s wife would yell out the window, “Listen, America, my husband is a nut!”

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      OMG, I loved that show.

  • Chadwells

    The fucked up thing is that THERE HAS GOT TO BE FAR WORSE THAN THIS!!!! This is the only shit leaking to the press.

    I mean, WTFF?! How are all these assholes NOT in cuffs yet!?!

    • snark-lurker

      They got money.

      • Chadwells

        This is bigger than money tho!

        • snark-lurker

          One lawman at a time: “We can make you rich, at this very moment. Or we can fuck up your lives (i.e. famly too) in ways you can’t even imagine.”

        • Swampgas_Man

          They got power, too. And a (shrinking) percentage of voters who doesn’t really care what the scumbags do as long as they stick it to us Libs.

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          What are you some kind of commie?

          • Chadwells

            This is like overt treason!

            Man….I shoulda been born rich!

          • wavicles

            It’s a mindset, apparently. I never knew that it’s so easy. Thanks Dr. Carson. That man is brilliant!

    • Lambsendbeds

      IOKIYAR.
      Congress is full of corrupt, traitorous, self serving assholes doing their master’s bidding.

  • Joe Beese

    I haven’t hated Russians this much since the opening weekend of Rocky IV.

  • RobKanC

    If the glove doesn’t fit, you must acquit and we all know the glove doesn’t fit his tiny hands.. So there..

    • Lambsendbeds

      If Chewbacca lives on Endor you MUST acquit!

      • RobKanC

        Here, look at the monkey. Look at the silly monkey!

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    And just think, hes’ supposed to be “the smart one” in the White House.

  • chascates

    The gang that couldn’t traitor straight.

  • bookish

    Is this even legal (oh, silly me)? And are we paying for it?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-war-russia-probe_us_5928a335e4b0df57cbfbcecb

    • mancityRed6

      “…and likely involve more trips out of Washington that will feature the kind of raucous rallies that were the hallmark of Trump’s campaign.”
      oh. good. I just can’t wait. whoopee.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Say, you know who else… ahhh, fuck it.

        • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

          On the upside, Hitler’s rallies got bigger and bigger. Trump’s are getting smaller and smaller. He can barely fill tiny arenas at state fair grounds now. Obama can draw half a million in Germany out of office. I’m kind of looking forward to the pics of tons of empty seats at Trump’s next ego booster. The last ones were pretty funny.

    • Michael R

      They put Bannon , Kushner and Corey Lewandowski in charge of that ,
      ( Penguin , Riddler and The Joker )

      • Count Awesome

        Don’t trust the penguin, he’ll tape up shredded documents.

        • NellCote71

          Want to bet that Bannon assisted in this intel getting out?

          • Michael R

            He do love him some chaos .

          • NellCote71

            And he hates Kushner, but who amongst us do not?

        • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

          A lot of tape and a little patience make all the difference

    • SayItWithWookies

      Oh, if that dumbass motherfucker had put half as much effort into being honest as he’s now putting in to lying about lying — well, then pigs would fly and I’d be making millions from advancing that Nigerian prince a few hundred bucks so he could deposit money in my bank account.

  • DainBramage
  • John Iwaniszek

    fuck, yeah.

    also, that is a really sweet shot of ivana and her kids. We eastern european folk age well.

  • Count Awesome

    You know who WON’T be going to Jared from now on?

    • Jamoche

      I really hope the jewelry store is suffering from the incidental fallout. Maybe then they’ll kill their annoying ad campaign :)

  • chascates
  • Count Awesome

    I’m certain this is all as innocent as groping women seems to be.

  • NellCote71

    Great work.

    Donated. Through Pay Pal, not Amazon, if you get my drift.

  • Ilgattomorte

    I have to disagree. In my experience the nation’s Dads are more concerned with why they have to get up and pee 4 times during the night and why the nation’s Moms don’t touch it any more.

    But after all of that, they are really upset about Jared Kushner.

    • Me not sure

      Amen, brother.

  • Count Awesome

    Jared only wanted to install a hotline so he could find a new eastern European wife for Donald.

    • NellCote71

      Melanie is getting a little long in the tooth by Trump standards.

  • Pinkham’s Law

    Ah – another peaceful evening. I wonder what Jared will say when he finds out, after sundown tomorrow?

    • Count Awesome

      He’ll delete his Instagram posts.

  • La forza del resistino

    Donald’s affection for Russia blossomed when he found they named the River Don after him. To most of the rest of us, we just find him a Volga old man.

    • NellCote71

      Oh, you little Minsk.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Ural a real barrel of laughs tonight.

        • vivian

          If Ukraine your neck, you can see Russia from here.

          • sg77

            Oy.

    • SayItWithWookies

      Since the Don empties into the Black Sea, it’s also known as the Crimea River.

    • thixotropic jerk

      It all just makes me so Angara

    • georgiaburning

      Could we just Dnieper these puns in the Bug

    • DrBigHead

      You are all my heroes

      • Lamashtar

        Don’t you mean “Ural my heroes?”

        • DrBigHead

          OUCH!

    • not_vh

      vla the vostok? is this for real?

    • Shibusa

      He’s going to be Russian over to Moscow when the indictments start raining down.

  • boyblue122

    Doesnt this Kushner article tie into the other WaPo article about wanting to create a back-channel communication using Betsy Devos’ brother Erik Prince

    • La forza del resistino

      recalls the old joke, how many Trumpites does it take to screw in a back-channel connection?

      • Count Awesome

        AOT, K?

        • La forza del resistino

          U right. As news unfolds, I should said ‘how many to screw up a back channel connection’.

      • SayItWithWookies

        Three — one who Trump orders to do it, one who asks the Russians to do it, and Trump, who says he did it all by himself.

    • RobKanC

      All Donnie wanted was his special friend Putin in his back channel.

      • Suse

        Eeewww!

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      Yes. It was all a part of the same plan. Prince met with one of Putin’s closest friends and advisors in the Seychelles.

  • shoeflyin
  • Picabo

    The Russians Are Coming! I am am an an old. Funny movie.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEWWRbn4zG0

    • Suse

      Alan Arkin is a national treasure.

      • Count Awesome

        I loved him in “Little Miss Sunshine”, plus he is an alum of the same High School I attended.

        • Suse

          He was hilarious in that.

          • Count Awesome

            “Take my advice, fuck a lot of women.”

          • Three Finger Salute

            Grosse Pointe Blank, as Martin’s long-suffering shrink.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZM4JlR4_2w

          • Suse

            I haven’t seen that one.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Great movie. John Cusack (who wrote the screenplay too) plays a burned-out hitman named Martin Blank, who gets an assignment in suburban Detroit that happens to coincide with his 10-year highschool reunion. He wants out of the business, but has to contend with a rival assassin (Dan Aykroyd — yes, that Dan Aykroyd) who wants to drag him back and “unionize” the profession. All the while trying to reconcile with the girl (Minnie Driver) he left behind on prom night, when he “flipped out”, joined the forces and became one of their hired spooks. Alan Arkin plays his therapist who keeps trying to “fire” Martin as a client because he’s discomfited by his line of work. But Martin keeps showing up, causing the shrink to develop neuroses of his own. Funny flick with a great ’80s punk/nu-wave soundtrack (The Clash, The Violent Femmes, The Specials) to boot.

          • NastyBossetti

            I love that movie.

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      Please to get off the street!

  • Lot_49

    Was Area Man involved in this colloquy?

  • Suse

    Meh, nothing will happen to any of them.

    • Yr. Gma

      I’m more optimistic.

      • snark-lurker

        Why?

        • Yr. Gma

          Because the arc of history bends toward justice.

          • georgiaburning

            I like to think so, but I get impatient waiting for geometry

          • Yr. Gma

            It’s not gonna happen overnight.

          • Jon Sussex

            Global species extinction rates temper my optimism.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Well, all that means is that the #1 predatory species (people) is going down with the same ship as everyone and everything else. Sooner or later we’ll all be on a long strange trip in that magic mushroom cloud in the sky.

          • snark-lurker

            Sometimes like a rainbow…bends toward but never reaches…
            the end

    • boyblue122

      now that a special prosecutor is on the case someone is there to act on all this news youd think

      • snark-lurker

        youd think

    • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

      There’s this part of me that thinks all of these “leaks” are coming from the Trump inner circle to inoculate us. Lots of small little things, nothing damning and it’s been 2 weeks straight. It’s fucking chaos and slowly, little by little, the nation is starting to shrug their shoulders and say, “So what? Nothing is happening to them”.

      By then again, I’m cynical.

      • snark-lurker

        mee too

      • sw19wilson

        I’m more of the mind that Putin has seen that – having his useful idiot boorishly barge his way (literally) through NATO partners and generally act the cunt – is actually uniting people and countries, instead of causing the disruption that Putin (and Bannon) want.
        Weakening Trump is actually Plan B: stringing out the chaos for as long as possible and at least disrupting the US domestically.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        This had to come from the intelligence agency that collected the info. Or maybe the House or Senate intelligence committee, if they got briefed on the matter.
        What bothers me is that Kislyak now knows that the channel he communicated on is compromised. That’s precisely the sort of fuckup that Trump was being roasted for.

        • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

          One rumor is that England caught Kislyak’s conversation with Moscow about this on tape and this is payback for the Manchester leak and all of the other shit Trump’s done.

  • snark-lurker

    > 60 years since the US executed anyone for treason. We are WAY overdue.

    • georgiaburning

      That could be a replacement for “Dancing with the Stars”- “Treason with the Trumps”

      • Count Awesome

        Trump’s administration is a reality show…

        • Boojum

          I hope this isn’t reality.

          • Count Awesome

            “Alt-facts exist so why can’t alt-realities?”
            –Some Trumpanzee Piece o’ Shit

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      I can think of 15 people in the GOP just off the top of my head who’ve committed more treason than the Rosenberg’s ever imagined.

  • sw19wilson

    So, is a Friday night news dump a thing any more, or are these New Rules?

    • snark-lurker

      This is the new normal.

    • Count Awesome

      It’s the new rule if the person claims they observe the Jewish Sabbath. Jared is either oblivious or seething.

      • sw19wilson

        Ohhh, I see. That’s some spectacular ratfucking, then!

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      We can’t have anything nice any more, including nice weekends.

      • Count Awesome

        To paraphrase “Frisky Dingo”:

        “It’s because of Donnie’s fat ass.”

    • SayItWithWookies

      It’s been replaced by the shabbat scandal rumpus.

  • Saxo the Grammarian

    No Obamaphones were involved. What’s the big deal.

  • DainBramage

    On a scale from 1 to 10, how treasonous does this look?
    11

  • Moebym Reborn

    Who’s a baby-faced legacy Harvard admit and father of three who set up a secret spy channel to Russia because he’s such a failure at being a real estate magnate that he needs Russian money to keep his real estate ventures running?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hvba_LDUC_E

    • Me not sure

      Shaft?

      • Vecchioivan

        Right on.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          He’s a BAD motherfucker!

          • Suse

            Shut yo mouth!

        • Me not sure

          Just talkin’ ’bout Shaft.

        • Suse

          He’s a complicated man…

    • Three Finger Salute

      The KGB begins with Kay!

      • Moebym Reborn

        Every kiss of polonium begins with Kay (GB)!

  • Jamoche

    “You’re in the White House. For goodness sakes, you don’t need a back channel. You have a direct channel” – former ambassador to Russia on Maddow.

    • rebecca

      this was during the transition. they couldn’t wait two weeks.

      • Count Awesome

        Makes me wonder what else they couldn’t wait for.

      • Jennifer R

        Shortest transition ever!

      • DainBramage

        They are incredibly stupid.

      • SayItWithWookies

        “Quick — how do you run a country? Google doesn’t have a one-page answer.”

      • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

        News out now says the conversations during the election.

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        I think the real reason is surveillance. They wanted a channel to Moscow that the FBI, CIA, and NSA wouldn’t be monitoring.

  • Jennifer R

    Second Jared news bombshell of the day!
    https://twitter.com/ReutersPolitics/status/868269051553992704

  • Incoming Ham

    Ugh. How long do we have to wait before Russian is declared the official language? It’s hard and we all need a head start.

    • georgiaburning

      There will be a lot of jobs turning letters backwards on the street signs. “STOP” doesn’t change, though.

      • Three Finger Salute

        If you change it to Pots, you have to make the sign green :)

      • Incoming Ham

        True. If my one semester of Russian taught me anything is was…nothing. I just sucked at it.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        IOKIYAЯ

    • ariel_gee_398

      Better get used to eating Russian delicacies, too, like this one: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimosa_salad
      “[A] festive salad, whose main ingredients are cheese, eggs, canned fish, onion, and mayonnaise.”

      • Rasilom

        NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!! Will not eat!!! you can’t make me I wont do it!!!!

      • Incoming Ham

        Oddly, I don’t mind *most* Russian food (we have a good Russian restaurant nearby) and good Russian vodka. I would however forgo the above.

      • Suse

        That sounds kind of good.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Lots of mayonnaise.

      • yyyaz

        As long as there are no canned clams, I’m good.

    • Courser_Resistance

      I’m learning Swedish through Babbel.

      • Incoming Ham

        Me too – really.

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      Never. It’s too much time, money, and trouble to force that. Plus, the GOPers pretending this is fine would lose all plausible deniability and their gullible minions would be pissed at having to learn something.

  • Pinkham’s Law

    I like that this information is “according to intercepts of Russian communications that were reviewed by U.S. officials.” This merely serves to highlight how amateurish this Administration is – we found out about this by listening to the communications Jared wanted to use.

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      Note the “were reviewed by US officials”. Not recorded by or intercepted by but reviewed by. Was this conversation perhaps intercepted and recording by MI6 (Britain’s intel agency), DGSE (France), or BND (Germany) and given to US officials? Maybe. Pissed and humiliated NATO leaders striking back? Revenge for the Manchester leak?

  • TJ Barke

    Can we outlaw the republican party as a seditious organization yet?

    • Three Finger Salute

      And a hate/domestic terrorist group. Trumpism has emboldened the most odious lowlifes this world has ever known.

    • Rasilom

      Me thinks the entire GOP needs to be prosecuted under the RICO act. Side note when I first typed prosecuted my system auto corrected to prostituted. For some weird reason it seems to work almost as well.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Except that Putin tool Sessions is in charge of the Justice Department.

        • Three Finger Salute

          He’s not only a tool for Putin. He’s also… just a tool.

          • Suse

            A drooling foolish tool.

          • Three Finger Salute

            But a dangerous one. He’d have people in solitary at Leavenworth for possession of ficus plants if he could.

          • Suse

            He’s one evil little dude.

          • Three Finger Salute

            Who’s still butthurt about the Lost Cause and determined to make the South rise again.

          • Boojum

            Well, I’m not all that fond of ficus, either…

        • Rasilom

          Unfortunately you are correct. Maybe we can get Keebler to call him back to the tree.

      • Boojum

        A civil RICO suit, then. We’ve got the conspirator in Florida, Stone, Page, Flynn, and Manafort. Rope in Rinse Prepuce and the case is made.

        • Ms.Moon

          Also Trump is “family” now Paul Ryan.

      • Roni Raven

        I think you will get your wish.

        • Rasilom

          PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!! My birthday is in a couple weeks and it is all I want for my present!

      • Opalescent Riddles

        Except that the GOP is already prostituted, so saying that they need to be prostituted is a bit Elvis has left the building.

  • azeyote

    but – he has a flak jacket – wasn’t that to protect him from this kind of thing

    • georgiaburning

      He should have worn it around his mouth

    • sw19wilson

      Being white and rich was supposed to do that.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        What is this country coming to?

  • Count Awesome

    Jared will have to go to Jared to buy a nice ring to make amends to Ivanka for being a traitorous ass.

    • wavicles

      I think that you mean make amends for BEING CAUGHT being a traitorous ass. Then maybe a nice brooch too for when he spills about her own traitorous assitude.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Hey, Jared, think about this:

    ♫ You’re working for Donald now.
    Your wife is just his cow.
    You’re digging a ditch,
    You’d better become a snitch.
    You’re working for Donald now. ♫

    • goingohm

      Ahh I ain gon work for ‘vanka’s pa no more

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    So much for Trump’s imaginary “phone tapp” in Trump Tower. They caught the skeezy little motherfucker from listening in on his Russian handlers.

    • Me not sure

      Do you think for a moment that when the Russians started chattering about this that they didn’t know that they were being listened to? They set the fools up in order to knock them down. The directionless chaos that results from all of this could go on for years. WINNING!

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I’m sure they’re still chuckling over the released transcripts of them talking about what a total fucking moron Carter Page is.

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        Absolutely. Other than lifting the sanctions, Putin wants and needs nothing from Trump.

  • Picabo

    Neil deGrasse Tyson > Quotes > Quotable Quote
    Neil deGrasse Tyson
    “The Universe is under no obligation to make sense to you.”

    ― Neil deGrasse Tyson

    • Courser_Resistance

      You know what? Since I don’t have the time or inclination to do the study necessary for the Universe to make sense to me, I’ll take Neil’s word for it. He’s much smarter than I’ll ever be.

  • Suse

    Anagram for Jared Corey Kushner: Shark Eyed Conjurer

    • Suse

      Also: Shady Conjurer Reek

  • Wild Cat

    Every nazi collaborator and every child and grandchild of a nazi collaborator must feel a great deal of sick self-satisfaction as they watch the entire united states’ republican/conservative/pseudo-libertarian party collaborate with the russians and much of the u.s. populace being fine or apathetic about it.

    In the meantime, I wonder, why the fuck am I paying taxes to an illegitimate government that is not protecting me.

    • Courser_Resistance

      This makes it hard to sleep at night.

      • Wild Cat

        Harder too is that 20–40% of Our Loony Fascists will take a bullet for these mobsters and traitors.
        And populations don’t rise up until their children are starving, and to maintain what we have, we can’t wait that long.
        And please, not another fucking emo march.

        • Ms.Moon

          I honestly think that they should take a bullet with these colloborators. These people have no problem supporting treason therefore they should not consider themselves patriots because it is quite clear that they are not. The Constitution is not something that they love they conveniently wrap themselves in the flag, they are hypocrites of the highest order. What they want is to live some fantastical life in an America that only exists in their imaginations where their maleness and whiteness gives them authority over everyone and everything else.

  • Swampgas_Man

    OK, not saying I want Jared to end this way, but it’s PERFECT–
    https://www.facebook.com/corridordigital/videos/1417483374980278/

  • armed_bears

    If you see black smoke rising from the White House, it’s not a new pope… it’s documents going up in flames.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Smoooooooooooooooke in the White House! Liars go bye-bye!

  • La forza del resistino

    Jared:
    no experience in governance.
    no experience dealing with spies
    does one dare asking Ivanka how she rates her love life

  • Zippy W Pinhead
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      When they do that they’re essentially saying, “Yeah, we know our guy is a crooked dumbass, but so was Obama.” What
      happened to Trump being different? Better? A swamp drainer? Instead,
      they justify and excuse his myriad gaffes and offenses because the dude
      they hate was “just as bad.” Am I missing something?

      No, that just about covers it.

      • TJ Barke

        Cognitive dissonance.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        The “he did it too” defense- an ever popular excuse amongst six year olds and the mental midgets of the right wing… Classic example on Faceplace today- a friend posted something about Gianforte. Some RWNJ decided it was necessary to bring up Teddy Kennedy and Chappaquiddick, in order to prove that ‘Dems break the law too!”

        SMH

  • Count Awesome

    It’s absolutely disgraceful that on Monday the Russian pawns, President Bone Spurs will lay a wreath on the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier and make awful speeches in honor of those that have sacrificed their lives for our Constitution.

    • jesterpunk

      How long into the speech before he makes it about himself?

      • Count Awesome

        It will be about him when he wakes up.

        • Cogswell – in a mirror darkly

          Hell, I’m betting all of his dreams are about him when he’s sleeping.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Today we honor the memory of me having the yooogest electoral victory in the history of the country. Did I mention the million and a half people at my inauguration?

        • Count Awesome

          “And millions and millions veterans her today to watch me honor our fallen.”

        • jesterpunk

          “No one knows who this soldier is, did you know that is why they call him the unknown soldier? You know what else no one knew? They didnt know I could win the electoral college, its impossible for republicans to win but I did it bigly. I had the largest win ever”

          • Three Finger Salute

            Biglier than 9/11!

          • jesterpunk

            Bigger then 7-11 too.

          • Roni Raven

            “What a loser. I like soldiers that are known.”

        • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

          Crooked Donald Trump speaking at the wreath-laying: “Say, do you know who else gave their life for their country? I did! I loved my former life. I had no idea this would be so hard … etc.” *chirping*

      • Cogswell – in a mirror darkly

        Is there a pool for that? I’m betting on 30 second mark.

        • NellCote71

          17 seconds here.

      • NellCote71

        I am sure he will lay a copy of the electoral college map along with the wreath.

        • jesterpunk

          He will just lay the map down and forget about the wreath.

        • Suse

          He must have thousands of copies of that thing.

          • Count Awesome

            He probably charges $100 for an autographed copy at one of his awful rallies.

        • Doug Langley

          That IS the wreath.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        He’ll use the word “sacrifice” to segue right into his persecution complex.

      • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

        If he don’t like captured soldiers he must really hate the dead ones.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      He will then go back to the White House and wipe his fat ass on copies of that document. Literally and figuratively.

    • Suse

      That makes me sick. He shouldn’t allowed anywhere near anything related to dead soldiers.

    • Rick Hill

      Constitution? All those sacrifices were so that we arrived at this point in time, the world ripe for the plucking by trump and his family

    • Anna Rompage

      Wouldn’t they be considered losers for dying in the midst of a battle?

      Man the fuck up and perceiver! You’re guts may be laying by your side, but Donald’s dad’s profits are relying on you to fight for his right to run a slum, and make a killing off of it…

      • Suse

        “I only like soldiers who weren’t killed.”

        • Anna Rompage

          Or taken captive!

  • armed_bears

    I am going to be royally PISSED if it turns out this whole damn administration is an elaborate punk set up by Joaquin Phoenix, Mike Myers and/or Aston whats-his-name.

    • Roni Raven

      I would be royally relieved, actually.

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        Me too. I am ready for this performance art to be over.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane

    • jesterpunk

      I dont think any writer could write something this crazy, no one would ever believe it if it wasnt actually happening.

    • Ricky Gay

      Damn you Andy Kaufman!

      • TJ Barke

        The man himself as Trump.

  • WomanInThePersistence

    Again?!? Really?!? I’m too old for this shit. God almighty I miss no drama Obama.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    In other breaking news, the Senate Intelligence Committee has asked the Trump campaign to “gather and produce all documents, emails and phone records going back to his campaign’s launch in June 2015.”

    Oh yeah? Tell me more:

    The request to Trump’s political operatives represents the first time
    that Trump’s official campaign structure has been drawn into the Senate committee’s ongoing bipartisan investigation. That investigation is separate from the federal probe being led by the Justice Department’s special counsel, former FBI director Robert S. Mueller III.

    In recent months, several Trump campaign associates, such as Roger Stone and Carter Page, have been contacted by Senate investigators, but the campaign itself had not been asked to preserve and produce materials.

    Those drips are getting larger and larger!

    • Suse

      “The dog ate our documents!”

    • Count Awesome

      That theme park in Kentucky can save the Trump administration from the deluge.

      • Suse

        Ha!

      • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend

        That boat won’t float.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Trump is known as a document shredder. He has done it in other “law suites”. The funny thing is that like Mike Pence’s shady dealings in Indiana, someone has kept copies. Someone will trade that backup for a lighter sentence. My bet is on Flynn. #popcorn

  • Boojum

    I’m sure there’s an innocent explanation for omitting a conversation with the Russian Ambassador about wanting a secret way to communicate with Putin.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      cause apparently secure white house phones aren’t enough.

      Sheesh.

    • yyyaz

      Billions of them, actually, but innocent, not so much.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      And declaring all of his assets on his security clearance forms…

  • At what point exactly does it stop being “drip, drip, drip” and become “giant whirlpool that sucks entire administration in and drowns them”? I feel like we should be getting there.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I can wait until all of them are squealing (like a pig) and spilling everything they know. I want the BS to be as damning as it was for Nixon. More so, in fact.

    • Yr. Gma

      Watergate took two years.

      • Did those two years feel like 20? Honestly curious. I feel like the last 6 months have had several decades’ worth of news dumps and I can’t imagine two years of this. The only frame of reference I really have is all the Clinton investigations, but those a) never seemed so serious and b) happened when I was a pre-teen/teenager and it was easier to be self-absorbed and not pay so much attention to the news.

        • grindstone

          I was young, but Watergate seemed to go on forever. We can take hope in the fact that communications move much faster now.

        • Yr. Gma

          It was so new, this kind of treachery, that I found in fascinating. I didn’t fear Nixon, but I wanted him gone. This thing is moving at warp speed compared to Watergate. We heard a new piece of information every couple of weeks or so back then, and then there were the televised hearings (completely new idea in the 70s when there was no cable television.) There was drip, drip, drip, and then Nixon was convinced to resign. Because there is a new thing every day now, sometime hour by hour, it seems that the process should lead to a conclusion faster than it has. It’s still going to be awhile until this is over, but it really is going along faster than Watergate did.

  • Rick Hill

    Gosh. Remember those carefree, innocent times? Back when the most we conjectured was that Melania would be an agent for Russia, getting into all the sekrits when donnie left his laptop unlocked? And now it turns out it was everyone but Melania. Every fcking one! Now we find out Jared wanted his own hotline t the Kremlin.
    http://www.denofgeek.us/sites/denofgeekus/files/styles/article_width/public/5/78/get_smart.jpg

    • Count Awesome

      Na-na-na-na-na, Jared.

    • SayItWithWookies

      And that’s the second time the answer to a question was “It was everyone but Melania.”

    • Stulexington

      Nah, Melania’s the only one of the bunch actually smart enough to cover her tracks.

  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    Posted in what was previously the Open Thread:
    Two questions about Just Jared:
    1) What does his voice sound like? John Oliver had a good sketch on that, but really? What does he sound like?
    2) Does he lose his Tribe Card for being a Jew colluding with Russians? On the behalf of Nazis? For money?
    Enquiring minds want to know…

    • Suse

      I’ve never even seen his mouth move in any news clips. Weird.

      • Count Awesome

        It’s a ventriloquist act perpetrated by Putin and Donnie.

    • jesterpunk

      Someone last night in the last thread of the night found an actual clip of him talking, he sounds like an idiot. He comes on at around the 1 minute mark.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrduuwybf8w

      • Suse

        He actually says “prolly.”

    • Count Awesome

      I said a couple days ago that he looks awfully “Nazi-ey” for a Jew. He’d probably look right at home in a Hugo Boss SS uniform.

    • Ms.Moon

      Can Jews be excommunicated like Catholics? Can all reputable rabbis hold a conclave and kick him out of the religion?

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        I know that they can keep you out of High Holy Days if you haven’t paid your “dues” to the synagogue. I have a Jewish friend who invited me to the “outsider’s” service at her grandparent’s synagogue one year. Held in the basement for non-members, members not in good standing and the public. I had been there once before when they had a Purim festival open to the public with my daughter, because I was trying to expose her to different cultures and faiths.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Also, I posted this tweet in the open thread but it is very relevant to this one:

    https://twitter.com/RealMuckmaker/status/868257445784760321

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      How long before he starts hiring hookers for people who might testify against him so he can film the encounter and try to blackmail them into silence….just like his sleazebag dad.

    • SayItWithWookies

      I can’t even imagine what’s going to be on his rap sheet once all the pipers are paid. Or Flynn’s, or Assmouth’s, or Manafort’s, or Sessions’s, or Nunes’s, or whoever that weirdly roundheaded secretary of commerce is who seems to be in on every national security issue, or — oh hell, I almost forgot Rexxon Tillerson. And that’s just the starting lineup.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    so where are we open threading…we need direction!

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Elijah Cummings post

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Dads? I’m a little bit glad mine is dead (he’d be 99 if he wasn’t and I miss him every day) because this administration is so awful he would have to use four-letter words to describe it, which he had a firm rule against.

    • La forza del resistino

      I pleaded the same, on set with Spielberg and all he could say was Elijah Cummings.

    • Count Awesome

      Dok can’t herd cats though.

      • Suse

        What?

        • Count Awesome

          Refresh. Spell check got me.

          • Do can’t her cats is the name of my next rockabilly fusion salsa band

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    I love George Takei when he is not having it:

    https://twitter.com/GeorgeTakei/status/868256665073836033

    • Just forgot, purposefully omitted to hide collusion, tomayto, tomahto

      • Stulexington

        You say gullible, I say Guantanamo.

    • Rick Hill

      Is it possible it’s a bad thing he forgot to mention that Putin had a transmitting device implanted in Jared’s skull? It’s a prefectly normal thing….

  • jesterpunk

    No MSNBC I dont want to see Megyn Kelly on the TeeVee, you need more Rachel, Chris Hayes and Lawrence not more right wing “journalists”

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      I want to see more Joy-Ann Reid, Malcolm Nance, Michelle Goldberg and Steve Kornacki, dammit!

      • jesterpunk

        I am normally working when they are on,I get done right when Chris Hayes starts.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Kornacki drives me crazy, but I love Joy Reid and Malcolm.

        • Resistance Fighter Callyson

          He can be a twerp, but he knows his way around numbers when the votes are being counted. I say we keep him.

    • Suse

      Can’t you give her a chance? /s

    • Wild Cat

      Turn it off, cancel your cable, and let them know.

    • Three Finger Salute

      Me Again Kelly

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      Seriously? Wow, they really want to throw away those massive ratings gains over Fox don’t they?

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    So my brave, brave teabagger rep is finally having a “town meeting” . . . on FacePlant, where he’ll be safe from being yelled at, and probably have minions filtering out any comments or questions he doesn’t like.
    When: May 30, 2017
    Time: 7:00 p.m. – 7:30 p.m.
    Where: Congressman Donovan Facebook Page

  • Everrett Fanuelli
  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    In case we get any Deleted Commenters, here’s why this is a big fucking deal:

    https://twitter.com/chalamojo/status/868263955059294208

    • oooooo it does, doesn’t it!

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Eh. Republicans will paint it as a harmless mistake by a political novice.

      • I really do not see how they can spin that. Asking for a private line to actual spies is…well…you’d have to be really fucking naive XD

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          It’s totally feasible that they will spin it akin to what I said. And the media is so dumb and into equivocation that they’ll by it and let this narrative take hold

          • The sad thing is that you are totally correct ^.^
            But just for the sake of my sanity, I am going to pretend a Brian Williams or some other talking head gaping like a landed fish and blurting out “You are so full of shit- he accidentally set up sekret communications with spies?????”

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        A naive political novice who they also defend as able and savvy enough to be the de facto head of the government.

      • Sister Suffragette

        They already are — some apologist on CNN earlier tonight was saying, “Jared is only, what, 35 or 36 years old?” So, you know, just a youthful indiscretion.

      • Count Awesome

        “But Obama…”

      • boyblue122

        Trump and his associates have been getting away with breaking the rules all their lives and didnt think the rules applied to them even in the highest political office

        • Everrett Fanuelli

          They still don’t because IOKIYAR

        • So weird since they kept saying over and over and over, that No one is above the law!!!!!

          • Stulexington

            And how they’re the best people and no one is more qualified than them.

      • Stulexington

        Who has no business being in office in the first place. Seriously incompetence is no excuse, not at that level. There is no doubt to benefit from, you fuck up, you resign before you’re fired.

    • Jennifer R

      You missed a DSFB Bernout earlier.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        I think he was a NeoAsshat.

        • WomanInThePersistence

          He was a neo-everything.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Was that the one on the Hillary Clinton Wellesley commencement speech thread? If so, I caught that one sadly.

        If we had yet another–praise Jesus, I missed it.

    • Michael R

      Someone told me that Russia is not considered a hostile nation ,
      from this point on it certainly should be .

      • Count Awesome

        Executive Order on Monady saying Russia isn’t hostile?

      • Technically speaking, there was no treaty or other formal ending to the Cold War.

    • Rick Hill

      Awww, it sounds so bad when you put it that way…

  • Michael R

    Former Russian Trump aide seeks immunity deal to testify before Congress

    http://www.rawstory.com/2017/05/former-russian-trump-aid-seeks-immunity-deal-to-testify-before-congress-nyt/

    • The Friday hits keep on coming!

    • boyblue122

      Isnt he afraid of that sweet, sweet polonium that Vlad might slip into his favorite drink

      • Count Awesome

        If it’s put in a Diet Coke, the Diet Coke might taste better.

      • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

        Doubtful. Deripaska is close to Putin and was made a billionaire by him. I don’t trust this unless he delivers the goods on Trump in a massive way.

    • boyblue122

      NYTimes wasnt going to get left behind on the Friday news dump. They had to brake a story too, also

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      Did you read his biography? He’s all mobbed up. Fuck him.

    • Stulexington

      Aaaand Putin just declared Trump a liability.

  • TJ Barke

    I hope we have to send the SEALs into the WH to evict Trump and comp.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Seal Team Six: The Hunt For The Donald.

      • Rasilom

        Sounds like a good movie plot.

        • Count Awesome

          I hope that movie has a happy ending.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Yeah, but his fanatically loyal sons won’t be around to die trying to protect him. They’ll be in Brazil with their Swiss bank account numbers.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        Aren’t they called DEVGRU now?

        • TJ Barke

          How about RAINBOW 6 then?

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            I could live with anyone from Delta Force to GSG-9 doing the takedown, honestly. :)

          • Personally, I want it to be female Marines. A whole platsqaud of them

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            That would be awesome! :D

          • It would be very very very very very awesome.
            Especially if Bannon mistakenly thought he could bluster bully those ladies because ladies.
            I, as a libtard, do not condone violence. But in that one hypothetical case…..

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            :)

            I’m not a pacifist, but I don’t believe violence should be a first option, or be taken lightly as an option.

            Likewise, I am against the Death penalty, except in cases of Treason.

          • I’m agin it even for treason. I think it would be much better to put said treason doin person on public display at like the capital building or something. Behind bullet proof glass. No funny outfit, no tour guides, no throwing things at or whatever. Just forever and ever being seen by all who pass as the person who betrayed your fellow citizens.

            I am really really mean.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            I won’t say you are wrong in your opposition, and your punishment is probably greater and more fitinng than what I propose.

          • jesterpunk
      • Count Awesome

        Hypothetically, will they argue over who did shoot Trump?

        • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

          Absolutely, complete with warring book versions of ‘the truth’.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        The hunt for the Orange November

        • Count Awesome

          “Rare photograph of Sean Connery autographed by Roger Moore” libelz.

        • sw19wilson

          The Men Who Stare At Old Goats

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • He never should have had clearance.

    • Count Awesome

      Why would he need clearance, Donnie will tell him everything and anything anyway.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Got news for you . . . you need to catch up with reality.

      • snark-lurker

        You mean “Today’s New Normal”.

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson

        Can’t help it–my urge to resist is too strong. Fuck this shit with a metric ton of investigations and prosecutions!

        • Pinkham’s Law

          Oh, I’m not saying to give up – far from it! Trump hasn’t consolidated control of the Government. He’s left far too many important positions unfilled for that, while showing his anti-Constitutional agenda far too clearly with his actions so far.

    • SayItWithWookies

      It’s certainly a noble idea — but if we get rid of everyone in the White House who’s taking orders from Russia, who’s gonna run the country?

      • Stulexington

        an adult who actually cares about the country?

      • Resistance Fighter Callyson
        • sw19wilson

          Sadly, it’s Republicans all the way down.

          • Stulexington

            Except if Trump has a way to take Ryan with him the entire line of succession is probably going down.

          • desida

            Sadly, I find it really, really unlikely that Orrin Hatch could be involved in this mess, so we’ll probably end up with him as president. Ugh.

          • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

            I’ll take him. I’d never vote for him but I’ll take him over Trump/Pence/Ryan any fucking day.

      • yyyaz

        Elijah Cummings works for me.

  • Pre-existing Ugly Dude
    • snark-lurker

      Sqwert sqwert sqwert… GUSH!

    • mancityRed6

      I knew a couple of…oh, no…nevermind.

    • Major_Major_Major

      The Nazgul are quite appropriate for these donkey taints.

  • Sophia
    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Retweeted/Shared.

  • goingohm

    All our broken news are belong to Jared.

  • Picabo
    • Saxo the Grammarian

      Hope you can salvage something of this long weekend after tonight’s news dump. ;-)

      • mancityRed6

        the one nice thing about a free press, the stars might not be in, but it still works…even on a holiday weekend.

  • Count Awesome

    Jared: “I may have committed treason.”
    Ivanka: “How much money did you make?”

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      Bingo.

  • boyblue122
    • TJ Barke

      Because Intel officers are the best bank managers.

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    ‘Trix, I think you’re living in a liberal bubble out there in Montana.

  • mancityRed6

    friday night, drinking beer and whiskey, and looking at Plaid Stallions…again
    http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/supreme.jpg

    • That’s some serious Flamenco shit right there.

    • Thiazin Red

      That is a confident man who is secure in his choice of style. The other two not so much.

    • Saxo the Grammarian

      No puffy shirt?

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      “Because I look goood in it, Motherfucker, that’s why.”

      • Thiazin Red

        This is a man proud of his outfit selection.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          It is indeed. xD

    • Incoming Ham

      He looks like he is going to do some FABULOUS bullfighting.

    • HorseChestnut

      Bless the continued existence of that website.

  • Marla

    The United States Government needs to be dissuaded from insulting and murdering me via the Trump family.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    From the classic musical Bye, Bye Turdy:

    ♫ We love you Jared,
    Boy, fuck, we do.
    We love you Jared,
    The Kremlin, too.
    When you’re unsecured, boy
    We are screwed.
    Oh Jared,
    We love you. ♫

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    I’d say it’s a “both/and,” not an “either/or” in this case:

    https://twitter.com/MaddowBlog/status/868277338726846465

    • SayItWithWookies

      It’s The Falcon and the Snowman translated for the “See Spot Run” crowd.

      • HorseChestnut

        God dammit, I wish you were wrong.

      • Tania

        Does it mean we are old if we know what you are talking about?

    • Stulexington

      He’s the one who jumped into the deep end, no one’s fault but his own he can’t tread water. Oh look, something your daddy’s dirty money can’t bail you out of.

  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    Treason doth never prosper, what’s the reason? For if it prosper, none dare call it Treason.

    Sir John Harington

    Hast thou betrayed my credulous innocence
    With vizor’d falsehood and base forgery?

    John Milton

    • Count Awesome

      “Trump is ok.”
      –Julius and Ethel Rosenberg.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        Well Played. *golf clap*

      • HorseChestnut

        Ethel Rosenberg libelz (she was apparently not guilty, and her sons have asked for her to be exonerated).

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Heading out to raise a ruckus. Peace, love, and revolution, Wonkers. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5301dd0772b836bcaa41342990e689bd44d6c70ccb2159fe301498e2d62c364c.jpg

    • WomanInThePersistence

      May your ruckus be peaceful and loving. And a boatload of fun.

    • Count Awesome

      If you encounter law enforcement, blame Trump and alternative facts rather than take personal responsibility.

      • Incoming Ham

        Tell the popo to call Kelly Ann Conway. She can explain anything.

  • Count Awesome

    The right claims Donnie’s trip to the Middle East, Israel (not in the Middle East according to president dipshit) and “Europe” was a success, and now he comes home to this mess? If I’m a betting man, Trump should be expatriated so he gets better press.

    • MassiveQuantitiesofPie

      They claim success every time he appears in public and doesn’t shit himself and throw it at the crowd.

  • Poly_Ester

    DT is the Liberace of world leaders, Hanlon’s rule applies.

    • sw19wilson

      But people loved Liberace.

      • Poly_Ester

        The olds, same as now.

        • sw19wilson

          Ah, good point.

        • Paperless Tiger

          It’s the hair.

      • HandsOfFate

        Shame he never found the right girl.

    • mancityRed6

      yeah, Liberace libels and all
      I can’t even say DT is the Sigfried or the Roy

      • sw19wilson

        The Andrew Dice Clay of world leaders?

        • Poly_Ester

          I still think he’s Chance the gardener.

          • mancityRed6

            Algernon. He’s Algernon and no one ever brought him flowers.

      • Poly_Ester

        I read this as Liberace Liberals and thought WTF.

      • The way things are going, Trump is the angry tiger.

    • Count Awesome

      Liberace had waaaaay more fair.

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Liberace was good at his job

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Roni Raven

      Thanks for quoting my new boyfriend! Isn’t he the best?

  • mancityRed6

    http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/denimman2.jpg
    There was a time in my life when I thought a denim suit would just be awesome.
    Then I started kindergarten and forgot all about it.

    • Thiazin Red

      Canadian tuxedo.

    • SayItWithWookies

      No damn plaid, no damn stallion.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Check out that Porn ‘Stache. xD

      • 2 for 1 ‘stache ride specials…

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          xD

      • mancityRed6

        see, the ex wouldn’t let me grow one because I really look like my dad who seems to have an affinity for both Tom Selleck and Frank Zappa facial hair.
        now I can, but don’t especially want to.
        maybe this fall.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          You can always shave it off if you don’t like it. :)

          • mancityRed6

            the funny thing is that the upper lip is the last thing I shave, several times lately I’m looking in the mirror thinking…maybe

          • AJ Milne

            I occasionally think of growing a beard…

            But then I think: I’m a relatively senior high-tech type, deep in the technical end… It’s just too damn cliché.

          • mancityRed6

            https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/805ce285ab323fc003eb355d95c315ac949c039374d390aa353272a89d0cf072.jpg
            It’s a cold weather thing for me. I can’t keep it past April. 1, because I get bored. 2, it gets warm and humid in Kansas.

          • AJ Milne

            That’s… an approach with merit.

            I get -40 here. And sometimes try to snowboard in the same. It could be like a permanent facial base layer under the neoprene.

          • mancityRed6

            it blocks the wind, but it takes as much care as the hair on your head.
            I’m lazy and winter goes away here. there’s a guy at work with a full on Muslim/duck dynasty thing going on, I don’t see how he does it when it gets up to 100/38 degrees

          • Old Man Yells at Cloud

            I had one for a while back in my 30’s. I eventually realized it took more time keep it from looking like crap than just shaving. Then I noticed a few grey whiskers and off it came.

          • mancityRed6

            I was counting grays/greys getting my hair cut at 17. I am 90% grey now
            https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/41a095299d5e68dc38c60eb8c6f599bb6ba3266d791faa1062a2bf9f07b3eb07.jpg

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Go for it! :) You might look really dashing.

          • mancityRed6

            you know what, I will. a nice summer mustache. I’ll post pics when it gets into a good stage. it might take a week or so.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            AWE-sum, good luck with it. :)

          • Old Man Yells at Cloud
          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            LOL

        • HorseChestnut

          I tried it, couldn’t stand it. I eat too much cereal and soup, damn thing’s like a sponge XD

          • mancityRed6

            let’s just say I was never a big fan of milk on cereal, or soup…but it’s been awhile since I’ve eaten something wet…so…it won’t affect me much.

    • zerosumgame0005

      do they really need the camo version? wearing that is already real good at hiding from the ladies!

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      In some ways I do miss the 1970’s, but that’s defiantly not one of them.

    • i don’t know. kinda digging this.

  • Jared’s a tall fucker, he’s going to need a bespoke orange jumpsuit.

    • Poly_Ester

      Does he have big hands?

      • I dunno, is there a photo of him with his hands on his wife’s ass so we can compare them to his father-in-law’s hands?

        • Opalescent Riddles

          Yeah, there’s that one from several weeks ago, when Vanky was wearing a Jiffy Pop dress in front of a mirror such that in the reflection, you could see Jared’s hand on her ass. I do believe his hand covered more of her ass than is seen in the many photos with Donnie’s hand(s) on her ass.

  • goingohm

    “Hi, I’m General Mike Flynn, for Kushner-Lax stool softener…”

  • TJ Barke

    Sing stoolie!

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • TJ Barke

      Stupid little rich kid that probably thought he was being so cool, and so smart, I hope he fucking burns.

      • Stulexington

        And he doesn’t even get the option of going to club fed, so he gets to be inflicted with a raging case of aflulenza in prison. Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving slumlord.

        • TJ Barke

          He was probably feeling so smug about it too.

      • CripesAmighty

        Prolly just saw ‘Casino Royale’ and thought, “Bond, Jared…”

      • Me The People

        Slum landlord as well, real scumbag when you get down to it.

    • mancityRed6

      how soon before he does a runner?

      • Think he’s smart enough? He probably feels that dad-in-law will protect him, even though Trump has no loyalty to anyone.

        • Stulexington

          And can’t actually protect him even if he wanted to. Kid, meet bus.

        • mancityRed6

          if he was smart, he’d be successful in the real estate business gifted to him.

    • Me The People

      But Hillary coughed!

      • Blackest Noobs

        and used a dot matrix printer.

    • cmd resistor

      I was thinking yesterday, why did Trump have to take this jerk to see the Pope; he could have given his spot to Spicer.

      • Roni Raven

        Who is, in fact, Catholic.

        • cmd resistor

          Devout, and dying to meet the pope.

    • natoslug

      It’s about time we started using Gitmo for some actual criminals.

    • wait! what?

      He looks like the violent love child of Anthony Perkins and Norm McDonald.

  • Count Awesome

    Coming soon to a theater near you:
    “In a world gone mad, one man tried to sell his soul to the KGB…”

    • That presupposes that he had a soul to begin with.

    • yyyaz

      The KGB/FSB believe in a lot of things, souls aren’t one of them.

    • wait! what?

      “…over and over again.”

  • The Librarian

    Did Darrell Issa (R-Dickville, but maybe changing tune since afraid of losing seat someday soon?) really suggest opening up the Congress’ health plan to everyone? In case I heard wrongly:

    May 24, 2017 — New Cosponsor

    H.R. 676: Expanded & Improved Medicare For All Act

    New Cosponsor: Rep. Marc Veasey [D-TX33]

    The bill now has 112 cosponsors (112 Democrats).

    • yyyaz

      Gee. Twenty-five percent of the 2017 Congress wants to move us out of the 19th Century. Yay.

      • natoslug

        What are you talking about? 100% of the 2017 Congress wants to move us out of the 19th century. It’s just that only 25% are trying to move us forward.

        • yyyaz

          Nit meet pick.

    • TJ Barke

      Oh come on, no way…

    • Count Awesome

      Fuck him. He is responsible for “the governornator”. He can suck cocks in hell along with whoever’s family member was said to do that on “The Exorcist”

    • The Librarian
    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      He’s on our radar regardless. We’re coming for you, Darryl!

      • yyyaz

        Turn the votes on that radar up to “vaporize.”

        • Stulexington

          Meh, “goose cooking” should be a high enough setting.

    • natoslug

      I thought he was eternally Darrell Issa (R-son).

    • tomamitai

      The health insurance industry won’t like this.

  • Michael R

    For anyone who missed it , the adventures of ” Make America Great Again ” hat
    ( in convenient GIF form ! )

    https://s4.postimg.org/li7w3od8t/maga_idiot_walks_into_pole.gif

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      That poor dog.

      • TJ Barke

        It’s a cocker spaniel, so it’s probably an asshole too.

        • Resistance Fighter Callyson

          HA! My Jack Russell Terrier (who is sweet, but what a handful) loves this message!

          (My Chihuahua mix is just wagging his tail and smiling.)

          • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

            My Shar-peis will kick that dog’s ass if you want them to.

          • mancityRed6

            I have a 15 (maybe more now) pound cat that would like a go

      • wait! what?

        It didn’t start out that way but it’s probably a cracker spaniel, now.

      • Old Man Yells at Cloud

        That poor lamppost.

    • Blackest Noobs

      so he runs into the pole and then proceeds to get madder at the driver because he walked into a pole.

      the MAGA hat is the cherry on top.

      • Stulexington

        Probably got madder because the driver had the window rolled down when he was laughing his hole off.

    • AJ Milne

      There’s… a certain metaphorical quality to that sequence.

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      I find that I keep scrolling back to this and laughing. Thank you.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Just another biased pole result.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • I do wish talking heads would stop doing that, “maybe this isn’t nefarious. Maybe everyone involved is just really super dumb” thing every time there’s a new scandal. Whether or not Kushner et al are the brightest bulbs in the chandelier (they clearly aren’t) no one is this stupid, and no way are this many people this stupid. And even if it were somehow possible that they were all just stupid but not evil, it’s not OK to leave the country in the hands of the terminally stupid, either.

    • boyblue122

      ignorance of the law is no excuse for breaking the law

    • Roni Raven

      That “Jared was just dumb” theory flies out the window considering the fact that Flynn was present also.

      • That’s what I mean. I guess both Jared and Flynn could be dumb, and Pence could be dumb, and Trump could be dumb (OK, Trump is definitely dumb) but if everyone involved is really THAT dumb, it’s not like that would just be no problem.

    • Blackest Noobs

      stupid? probably not. unscrupulous? DEFINITELY.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      If the defense is “We’re morons”…I’m not sure it’s going to work…

    • Me The People

      It’s another manifestation of this idiotic attempt at ‘balance’. If he straight up murdered someone in cold blood they’d probably suggest that maybe he never knew it was considered unlawful to do that.

    • Stulexington

      If ever there was a case of someone being criminally stupid, it’s here.

    • bookish

      Kushner hid it. He knew it was wrong.

    • AJ Milne

      Yeah, that conjecture really is past its sell-by, now.

      They _are_ a certain kind of dumb, no doubt. But it passes merely moot when this level of greedily craven is also so obvious. Do people not grasp these are in no way mutually exclusive?

  • Major_Major_Major

    GOP is gonna burn like a Roman fuckin’ candle.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
  • Bill D. Burger

    MSNBC and CNN have reported that a senior intelligence official is quoted as saying that “…Kushner was either breathtakingly naïve and stupid or he is absolutely insane, and I’m not sure which is worse because of where he is positioned in this government.”

    https://twitter.com/LawyerRogelio/status/868260054885175298/photo/1

    Gadamighty’___ Did Kushner think: “Yeah…that’s the ticket. We’ll have our own direct communications with the Kremlin and I’ll drop in and out of the Russian Embassy and no one will notice. Need to keep our money deals on the hush, hush. Can’t trust the United States intelligence services, but our buddies at the Kremlin will take care of us and they have the best interests of our country at heart.”

    • TJ Barke

      Arrest them all.

    • Roni Raven

      Everyone seems to be overlooking this from WAPO article:

      “The meeting also was attended by Michael Flynn, Trump’s first national security adviser.”

      Kushner was apprenticing.

      • Paperless Tiger

        He should apprentice in license plates.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Yup, here comes Flynn’s immunity deal.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Yet another meeting with the Russkis that Flynn and Kushner BOTH forgot to mention.

    • Blackest Noobs

      so remember how Trumpie was puffin’ out his chest and point his tiny digit from his tiny hand at our spy masters….calling them incompetent and such.

      1) payback
      2) why would you fuck with the intelligence agencies…legal or illegal they pretty much have it all dumbasses.

      • Bill D. Burger

        Trump also called the CIA “Nazi thugs” and our intelligence services in general “….still working for Obama. You can’t trust them.”

        This level of stupid and destructiveness is unparalleled in my lifetime. I’m left speechless.

        • Incoming Ham

          He thinks he can manage the narrative with his base by undermining the credibility of the intelligence services. His base are a bunch of loud motherfuckers, but they aren’t the majority. He is counting on the “loud” part and possibly threatening. He would love to get them to threaten his “enemies.”

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      I disagree. There is a good explanation, and no matter what it is… Team Trump is not going to like it coming out.

      • Bill D. Burger

        Indeed. The Russians wanted, 1st and foremost, the sanctions lifted. TrumpCo wanted their myriad money deals, money laundering schemes, ….alll working through Russian ‘banks’ and financial institutions, to stay away from prying eyes. Quid pro quo.

        This is as rotten and corrupt as it gets.

        • Paperless Tiger

          Peak rotten.

      • Shoto

        If the committee(s) and/or the special prosecutor subpoena the IRS for Orange Donnie’s returns, he’ll likely walk away. There’s serious dirt in those returns, and he doesn’t want it out. Further, the returns would provoke about a zillion more questions. Start pulling threads, and things get real ugly, real fast. If I were running the show, the first subpoena’s would be for the tax returns. Then again, psychopath GOPer’s have control. I can’t even…

  • Alt-dog

    I can just hear the nation’s super deaf old dads saying “Prince was a mercenary? I thought he played guitar!”

    • He spearheaded Operation Purple Rain.

      • wait! what?

        I hear it involved 23 different in a one night stand.

      • Old Man Yells at Cloud

        We lost too many good people in Operation Purple Rain. I will always remember Darling Nikki as she headed out that fateful morning in her red corvette with the raspberry beret perched jauntily on her head.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • CripesAmighty

      Won’t be long now. When the first one rolls over hard it’s gonna kick off the worlds most furious circle-stab.

      • yyyaz

        If it takes out Yertle and Fuckface Ryan, let the slaughter with votes commence.

    • yyyaz

      Unfortunately, a “position of public trust” is a legal term of art that dozens of overpaid (if paid) shysters will loudly proclaim Kushner is not in, because he is neither an elected official nor has he been appointed to a recognized office/position.

      • CripesAmighty

        He has been given a security clearance to perform a government role. One on which he lied like a rug by omitting this little Clusterfu…er, detail. That is the hanging gibbet.

        • yyyaz

          It is, but the judge who considers the argument and the appellate courts make the decision.

      • jesterpunk

        He is the SR advisor to Turnip.

    • Bill D. Burger

      Republicans are hiding. True believer ol’ conservatives are left speechless. Security experts are dumbfounded. Our intelligence services are dispirited and very, very angry. This whole mix is toxic to the extreme.
      This FUBAR bunch of treacherous liars/thieves/frauds/traitors must be stopped.

      • Roni Raven

        It will be. Team Treason Trump has vastly underestimated the patriotism among those who swore to uphold the Constitution and actually meant it.

  • ThunderCat

    Nobody can be that stupid, that arrogant, that ignorant of procedure, that clueless about the abilities of the IC.

    Can they?

    Honestly, I simply can’t get my brain around the implications of all these leaks, even if I were to discount, say, 1/2 of them. It’s still staggering. These people must be taking a shit-ton of sleeping pills to get some rest, because I sure as hell would not be able to sleep a single second if I had many skeletons in my closet.

    Do they think they can buy their way out of it?

    • TJ Barke

      Probably. And unless we can displace the republican filth in Congress and the Senate, they just might.

    • Jeff Ackerman

      Their arrogance will be their undoing. I get the impression that Trump, Kushner, et al feel that they are a cut above, and much smarter than us rubes. They are arrogant, and naive enough to think that they can charm and fool us.

      • ThunderCat

        Apparently, assaulting a reporter is no big…maybe Trump WAS right after all: he CAN shoot someone and not loose votes.

        I wonder what breaking point might be for his supporters?

        Dead girl or live boy?

        • jesterpunk

          Him saying “You know Obama was right about _____”

          • ThunderCat

            There would be heads exploding all over Trumpland. Fox News would suddenly be without on-air personalities. It would be … glorious!

    • Thaumaturgist

      This is capitalism. You get what you pay for. Thank Volodya has figured that out yet?

    • Roni Raven

      My theory. They think that they will somehow become American oligarchs analogous to the Russian oligarchs they interact with, who control most of the nation’s wealth at the expense of everyone else in the country.

      • yyyaz

        At this point, it is only a matter of the percentage of the GDP of either country that is at stake. The OPOS is trying to cement his status as a Kock, Mercer, Adelson or Walton.

      • ThunderCat

        Yeah, we are pretty close to that already; sure, we have that constitution thingie, but that seems to be getting more and more irrelevant, optional, or alternative factoid.

      • C4TWOMAN

        This sounds plausible, but only makes their arrogant stupidity sound more stupid. The reason the rich get away with god knows what in Russia is corruption is rampant and the mob is everywhere. That removed several civil society brakes on not only what one with enough money can do without consequences.

        AS bad as it is in the States, this is NO WHERE near the case. Hell, even in other problematic countries with corruption, I’m thinking of the Mexican Jaurez situation, this is not the case.

        All I can figure is their extreme privilege and hobnobbing with Russian upperclass twits, made them confuzzedled about WHY you can get away with stuff in Russia that you can’t get away with in America.

        .02

        • tomamitai

          Rich people in America only ever face real consequences when they fuck over other rich people. As long as they confine their fuckery to the lower classes they never suffer anything more than a slap on the wrists.

          • C4TWOMAN

            “when they fuck over other rich people” OR the government. Smart rich people used to understand this. You can get away with quite a bit if they don’t flaunt it and don’t offend the law man or IRS.

    • jesterpunk

      They have never faced any consequences for their actions ever so they all think they can get away with anything.

  • mancityRed6

    http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/chinchilla.jpg
    when your bathrobe just looks too damn good not to wear out

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Check those kicks, also too! xD

      • Jeff Ackerman

        The 1970’s called, they want their fashion’s back

        • tomamitai

          I am SO glad I managed to avoid being photographed in the 70’s.

    • Anna Rompage

      The African American Big Lebowski?

    • paxpax

      Want

  • Vincent Ricola

    It’s apropo that this news is coming on Memorial Day weekend, this treasonous orange fucker and his treasonous orange fucker family have pissed off the ghosts of our fallen American heroes. I hope they all rot in dark cells.

    • Roni Raven

      They will.

    • mancityRed6

      some idiot on the AM hate radio (filling in for the prime idiot because they’re all on vacation now) played some audio from a Ronnie Raygun talk about veterans, complete with background music.
      and I’m sitting in my car yelling at the radio, “why didn’t Ronnie serve, you soulless shill?”

      • tomamitai

        He did, and he must have done a good job, because the Krauts and Nips never took Culver City.

        • mancityRed6

          I stand corrected, but he never actually saw fighting…or even left the country…so…draw

          • theCryptofishist

            Did you ever hear the interview Terry Gross did with the guy who wrote “Dutch” (or maybe it was another bio) and she’s confronting him with the fact that Reagan said he had liberated the camps, and this guy is covering for him, even though he knows it isn’t true, but he things Ronnie was sincere in his belief and that makes it okay?
            Because wow.

          • mancityRed6

            I haven’t, but it does fit into the Ronnie mindset.

          • theCryptofishist

            It was just astonishing. Not so much for Ronnie–although that was pretty vile, also, too–but that guy would not allow her to be right, it was okay if Ronnie did it. Fucked.

    • Alt-dog

      “I hope they all rot in dark cells.”

      I think that would go a long way towards healing the nation. Finally, something we can all get behind.

    • snark-lurker

      A public walk up The Thirteen Steps would be sickly satifying for me.

    • mancityRed6

      *bzzzt*
      “Ah, well…it’s a good thing I pay for that malpractice insurance.”

  • Jennaratrix

    Oh, this is getting GOOD. I mean, really bad, but GOOD.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • TJ Barke

      Has he been critical of Putin even once since being president?

      • Roni Raven

        No. He’s never been critical of Putin ever.

        • TJ Barke

          Well, I think there are some old tweets from back before he was campaigning, but none since.

      • Not once.

      • mancityRed6
      • C4TWOMAN

        No, and that’s stupid. He should have expressed “safe” concerns. We’d see through them, but craftemanship, man. You gotta sell the fraud. Except his supporters apparently really are that dumb…

        • Stulexington

          It’s the arrogance I’ve come to expect from the latest crop of business assholes. You’ll notice Wells Fargo couldn’t be bothered offering up a sacrificial lame to throw under a bus either. They think they’re so insulated they don’t even need to play the game anymore.

    • Shoto

      “You can’t fight in here. This is the War Room!”

      — Orange Donnie

  • efoveks

    Innocent people don’t set up “war rooms” to fend off investigators’ “attacks”. Gosh golly, do I have enough popcorn for this?????? ;)

    http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/trump-to-set-up-war-room-to-repel-attacks-over-russia-probe-officials/ar-BBByT0a?OCID=ansmsnnews11

    • C4TWOMAN

      Answer: No, no you do not. No one does. Soon we will be facing popcorn shortages…

      • theCryptofishist

        Orville Redenbacher is rubbing his hands together in glee in his grave.

  • ken_kukec

    Jaroslav Kushnerovich — wonder how long the Russians have had this guy embedded with a family in Jersey.

    • mancityRed6

      it does put a spin on the Manchurian Candidate side of things.
      I wonder what his code phrase is?

      • Alt-dog

        Bullion.

      • Red Bird Ω

        Bigly

      • SisterArtemis

        “How about a game of twitter?”

    • ltmcdies

      The Americans….Reboot

  • Stulexington
  • mancityRed6

    http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/uptown.jpg
    so many pictures of black men with canes…from the ’70s…

    • Red Bird Ω

      Lol

    • tomamitai

      Do the suits come with the stilts, or are those extra?

    • theCryptofishist

      I think they were a dance group…

  • paxpax

    My Old Dad has been pissed since 11/9. He posts every anti-TЯUMP political cartoon to his Faceplace page every day which I am sure has lost him friends but you have to give him credit. He was a nuclear weapons technician in the (American) Air Force in Germany at the time the Berlin Wall went up – and to meet my Dad today he’s one of the most anti-war veterans you would meet. Hooray for Editrix’s Old Dad as well!!

    • yyyaz

      And, in lieu of gunfire, a 21-shot salute!

      • mancityRed6

        I’m sure the dogs in your neighborhood salute you

        • yyyaz

          I don’t think they drink. ;)

          • mancityRed6

            from someone who saw their 40 pound heeler dig her way under the bed on the fourth of July, they salute you.

    • mancityRed6

      dad was offshore during Vietnam, on a boat. he joined, not drafted.
      he even says he understood why the common villagers hated us after he talked to a few of the Zippo brigades
      http://www.pbs.org/weta/reportingamericaatwar/reporters/safer/camne.html

    • Claire

      I can’t even talk to my Old Dad about Trump. He says words I’m afraid might fry my phone.

  • mancityRed6
    • SisterArtemis

      gotta do the shoes, too

  • Duke

    What?

    The guy with the dimples is a traitor?

    This isn’t much of a Hollywood movie. The bad guys have scars and bad complexions.

    • mancityRed6

      even Hollywood said, “it’s not believable.”

      • C4TWOMAN

        They could make it a parody. It writes itself. Wait, nvd, SNL already did that….

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
    • ltmcdies

      I’ll give him kudos for uttering the obvious…”I should have voted for Hillary”

      I’ve yet to hear a Purity Berner and Steinist admit they fucked up

  • Shoto

    Who’s the lucky lady sandwiched in the middle of Dim-Bulb Jared and Dingbat Grifter Barbie Vank-Vank? Would that be Jared’s mommy?

    • C4TWOMAN

      That’s my guess.

    • snark-lurker

      “lucky”?

      • theCryptofishist

        For a certain value of “lucky.”

  • Bill D. Burger

    On a personal note, our youngest son sent us a note from West Africa today and tacked this onto the end of it. I wanted to pass it along.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DAyQL_VUIAA9ikW.jpg

    If you knew him….”It’s sooo’ him!”  He’s a terrific son and a kind man with a great heart….and one amazing doer in this world.

    Have a great long weekend you hearty Wonkers’…..and RESIST. (ง︡’-‘︠)ง

    • TJ Barke

      I dunno. I kinda like being a nobody.

      • Red Bird Ω

        :(

        • TJ Barke

          There’s a lot less pressure.

          • Red Bird Ω

            You’re somebody to us.

          • TJ Barke

            That is way too much pressure.

          • SisterArtemis

            We’ll pretend we don’t notice ;)

      • Bill D. Burger

        We all make or take our place.
        Take heart ; you’re in amazing company.
        Emily Dickinson

        I’m Nobody! Who are you?
        Are you – Nobody – too?
        Then there’s a pair of us!
        Don’t tell! they’d advertise – you know!

        How dreary – to be – Somebody!
        How public – like a Frog –
        To tell one’s name – the livelong June –
        To an admiring Bog!

      • mancityRed6

        too late, you’re on here now

        • Stulexington

          One of us! One of us!

      • Alt-dog

        Introverts, how do they work?

  • Everrett Fanuelli

    So this administration is doing their best imitation of GoodFellas? Kushner is Henry Hill, Kislyak is Pauly’s brother, Putin is Pauly, Trump is Tommy.

  • ltmcdies

    my only question of this tweet is …does he mean actually underground…does Sean have a bunker

    https://twitter.com/yashar/status/868286154474434560

    • jesterpunk

      The farm upstate with BillO doesnt have great cell phone reception.

    • TJ Barke

      Probably. Lots of rich assholes do.

    • Jennifer R

      I want B&W picks of Stone, O’reilly, and Hannity with a color one of Tucker at the end of the line up.

    • natoslug

      Six feet, we hope.

    • Stulexington

      I’m not coming out of my blanket fort until those big mean snowflake executives apologize,

    • AJ Milne

      Spider hole.

    • theCryptofishist

      Is this like hearing classical music on the radio in the twilight of the Soviet Union?

  • jesterpunk

    Its awesome that motherjones is using the image from when Jared went to play soldier.

    http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2017/05/reuters-jared-kushner-had-undisclosed-contact-russian-envoy-say-sources

  • J M Mtz

    TGIF?

  • natoslug
    • TJ Barke

      That’s the face I see at the clinic right before I need to resort to significant restraint.

      • SisterArtemis

        pillowcases. Kind of like catching a huge fuzzy fly under a very floppy glass.

        • TJ Barke

          That’s not effective when you’re trying to examine the patient…

  • chiefkurtz

    Speaking as an ‘Area Man’, I’m enjoying the prose style of this article.

  • C4TWOMAN

    This starts to complete the story of how it was Jared, not Bannon, that wanted Comey gone.

    Now you’d think, “Whoa! Jared’s smarter than that…that’s such an obvious ‘I’m guilty’ move.” But if he’s guilty, knows it and knows Comey wasn’t loyal to the Trumps, it might have been his ONLY move at the time.

    Further, he can’t be dumb enough to think it’ll just blow over and stop there. Watch for Jared taking a vacation to Moscow…and not coming back. He’s a snake, that one.

    • Roni Raven

      I hate snakes, but I must nonetheless say

      Snake libelzzl!!111

    • Stulexington

      Well no, but he might have thought the blowback would all hit 45 in the face.

      • C4TWOMAN

        Possibly. One article talks about his dad being convicted for blackmail, etc and he whined that God would forgive him(Krushner Sr.) but NOT his victims who pursued charges.
        Talk about narcissism. And this is Jared’s hero. There’s a lot of grandiose entitlement in that DNA….

  • Blackest Noobs

    Boner has some words…probably what all old white Republican men are thinking:

    https://www.yahoo.com/news/boehner-trumps-term-disaster-aside-foreign-affairs-151200072–politics.html

    • TJ Barke

      The foreign affairs are pretty fuckin’ disastrous too, there, Bourbon and Ice.

      • TJ Barke

        Someone needs to make that their nym and use a pic of Boner for their avatar.

        • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

          Alternate nym: “Boner on Ice”.

          • yyyaz

            Damn you younguns with your fast-fingered typing hands.

          • SisterArtemis

            “nimble-fingered” has never been a more appropriate term…

      • AJ Milne

        Truth…

        Possibly he just never got to finish his thought?

        ‘… aside from international affairs and foreign policy, President Donald Trump’s time in office has so far been a “complete disaster….”

        ‘_Including_ international affairs and foreign policy, it’s been a monumental clusterfuck no one even peripherally involved in will ever live down. As far in the future as four centuries from now, this will still be in textbooks under chapter titles like “how _not_ to govern” and “why licensing your name to sell steak bars you from seeking political office worldwide”…’

      • Blackest Noobs

        ha! Bourbon and ice, more like Bourbon and ciggs when it’s da Boner..ex-Speaker of the House.

    • Roni Raven

      Dear Republicans speaking rationally about Trump now:

      FUCK YOU. YOU built this. Own the monster you created.

      • Claire

        Boehner would try, but he bought it off Amazon when he was blackout drunk and then had no idea why it was in a box on his doorstep. He had his butler drive over and leave it on Paul Ryan’s front lawn draped in toilet paper streamers.

    • ltmcdies

      “Former House Speaker John Boehner says that aside from international affairs and foreign policy, President Donald Trump’s time in office has so far been a “complete disaster.”

      what the fuck does Boehner think a successful foreign policy looks like…Trump’s lucky the other NATO leaders didn’t turn the fire hose on him

    • Stulexington

      “he’s still learning to become president” no he’s not, he’s not learning a god damned thing, and apparently neither are you!

      • Paperless Tiger

        He may learn something about the law before it’s over.

      • ltmcdies

        he’s 70 fucking years old and I do not recall such latitude to a new guy in the job in 2009..

        get stuffed Boehner

      • jesterpunk

        President isnt an entry level job where you can have no clue what you’re doing and learn as you go, if you want an entry level political job start with dog catcher.

      • Minimum wage jobs boot you after 90 days (if not less) if you still don’t have the hang of things.

        • “M”

          125 and counting …

        • theCryptofishist

          As soon as the subsidy from the government for “training” the workers expires.

      • “M”

        Not only that – but the very first people to scream “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW HOW TO DO A JOB BEFORE YOU GET IT!1!” are inevitably Republicans.

    • mancityRed6

      GNCGNC10 hours ago
      “This old drunk Rino needs to leave Congress. New blood needed. Oust Ryan too.”
      yeah, that post got over 70 replies so far,

    • mancityRed6

      My first real thought was, “what does Boner from Family Ties have to say about anything?”

      • TJ Barke

        I thought he was on Growing Pains.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          Yes. The actor was the son of Star Trek’s Walter Koenig.

          • vivian

            Another factoid to Chekov my list.

        • mancityRed6

          dammit
          http://m.memegen.com/hpoa0g.jpg
          all those ’80s family shows run together after a few drinks.

  • LiPao

    Alex Jones sounds like a moose coughing out a turtle shell.

    • theCryptofishist

      But was that turtle shell crammed down his throat?

      • yyyaz

        Yes, but voluntarily.

        • theCryptofishist

          Not for the turtle!

    • jesterpunk

      How did Mitch McConnell get in the moose’s throat?

    • mancityRed6

      maybe just caught in it’s throat
      it’s not like I listen to him at all, but still…dammit…thanks for the ear worm.

  • puredog

    I may be more ignorant than most of my fellow Wonketteers about global politics in general and Russian history in particular, but I strongly urge anyone interested to drop everything — or, at least, sometime this weekend — and read the following linked NYer article about the current structure of the Russian Federation’s governance. The article is called “Oligarchy 2.0” in the magazine, while online it has the more prosaic name “Putin’s Shadow Cabinet and the Bridge to Crimea.” The parallels between the structure of the Russian hierarchy nowadays and the makeup of, say, the U.S. Cabinet, are inescapable. You can just imagine Trump talking with Vlad, or any of his minions, and musing to himself, “Boy, if I could set things up that way in the U.S., there’s no limit on how much money I could make.” It’s really scarier than shit, and fascinating. Joe Bob says check it out. http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/05/29/putins-shadow-cabinet-and-the-bridge-to-crimea

    • theCryptofishist

      Upfist for Joe Bob Briggs reference.

    • mancityRed6

      just started, but my first thought is, “good, build a bridge. nothing bad can happen to that.”

    • roberteye

      thank you!

  • Jennifer R
    • Canis the Grey

      He saw something, so he said something.

  • snark-lurker

    ?Q? Would we be in this situation if Bushco had been [tried] for War Crimes, Crimes Against Humanity etc.?

    • yyyaz

      Or if Jerry hadn’t pardoned the big Dick? Short answer, no. Immutably, unalterably and inexorably, no.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      If only, Doll.

      I’m re-reading “Thunder Run”, by David Zucchino. It’s an account of how Second (Spartan) Brigade of the 3rd Infantry Division used their armored vehicles to take Baghdad.

      The soldiers did a magnificent job, short on supplies, no spare parts, tanks worn out by heavy fighting – but what was their courage and sacrifice for?

      • snark-lurker

        oil

        • jesterpunk

          Operation Iraqi Liberation?

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Operation Iraqi Freedom.

            *sigh* Should have called it “Operation Cheney Fucks Us All”.

          • jesterpunk

            It was actually called Operation Iraqi Liberation until someone told the shrub administration that acronym was OIL. Then they changed it to Operation Iraqi Freedom (OIF).

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoSBqs6y8uM

          • snark-lurker

            Ha! Intarresting. I think I recall that’s twoo ! Yes

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            *shakes head* I’d forgotten, thank you.

          • snark-lurker

            And Shrub, toopid + rotten.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            And no longer the worst POTUS ever.

          • yyyaz

            Gah. How true.

          • theCryptofishist

            Usually, to get someone this bad, you’ve got to have an inbred hereditary monarchy.

      • yyyaz

        Why I gave up one of my few loves, history, after 11/9: it became meaningless when the result became where we are now.

        • C4TWOMAN

          It’s not meaningless, imo. This isn’t the first time human beings bamboozled other human beings into doing stupid things. Many argue one of the biggest cons ever is organized religions convincing people to kill each other over competing imaginary ‘sky people’ that only talk to the leaders. Talk about fake news….

          • yyyaz

            I’m with you on the sky fairies. The difference now is that there is far too much money in too few hands, all of whom are sociopathic shittards who only want more, fuck everyone else.

        • snark-lurker

          I am not currently reading any history cuz I’s so busy watching it live.

      • snark-lurker

        greed

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          Yeah. Reading about these people, how hard they worked, how well they fought, and all to make old rich men richer.

          • yyyaz

            Old uber-rich men who have never experienced anything close to the emotions of love, or empathy, and have more money than they could spend in 100 lifetimes. Roast them all over a spit on the beach with votes.

          • C4TWOMAN

            And bring marshmallows.

            Hmm…do marshmallows roast over “vote” fire? Only one way to find out!

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            *nods* I’ve seen photos of the tanks in the Thunder Run. One had lost a road wheel, and they had to chain the swing arm up out of the way, no more spares. Cheney sent them without air filters, without extra batteries….

  • oops.

  • jesterpunk

    For some off topic good news Colbert has the Pixies on tonight. I love Paz Lenchantin in every band she has been in and the Pixies are a great band.

    • Sheepshagger

      Kim Deal libel!

  • theCryptofishist

    Bank of Commerce and Credit International?
    Because old bank scandals never die, but linger in my brain in mutated form.

  • roberteye

    I smell pardons and pulling the plug on investigations. “They can’t do this to my boy!!!”

    • roberteye

      Plus JARED was the one who suggested to the old orange man to “fire Comey.” Oh man, I can see him at some hearing with Albert Brooks “Broadcast News” sweat spewing from his head.

    • TJ Barke

      The ability to pardon really needs to be axed…

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        the hundreds of people convicted for BS drug crimes by Bamz would beg to differ

        • TJ Barke

          Well, for Donnie it needs to be…

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            How about if we just axe Donnie instead?

            (oh no! Tucker Carlson will be yelling at me any second!)

      • C4TWOMAN

        Hmmm…I’d say restricted. Like to cases of genuine miscarriages of justice, either when all options run out or the person was exploited like Manning.

        But definitely it shouldn’t be used to wave away consequences for someone who is “guilty in the first degree”.

        • Canis the Grey

          Like Nixon.

      • Nah, it can be used for good. It just needs to be removed from the hands of corrupt treasonous monsters.

      • WomanInThePersistence

        Two words. Chelsea Manning.

      • Stulexington

        I don’t know, I can sorta see how it’s an important check on the judiciary.

      • Alt-dog

        Perhaps allowing pardons excepting cases with a pure conflict of interest.

        • mancityRed6

          this.

  • Jennifer R
  • WomanInThePersistence

    Just saying, Auntie Mame has the biggest New York apartment ever.

  • Corky Shimazu

    I’m sure Jared prefers to call it “illiquidity” (borrowed from Reddington on The Blacklist)

  • Sheepshagger

    I just needed a laugh before the apocalypse: https://twitter.com/spookperson/status/868118991553798144

    • bookish

      A hefalump, obviously.

  • Phoenixdoglover

    For this kind of news, I turn to Josh Marshall at TPM, because he does a good job of reconstructing the timeline when the events pile up. On this matter, his most recent post is basically, “I’m thinking about it.”

    My take on this:
    The inauguration is a month away. Kushner and Flynn take some risks (traitorous actions) to set up a secure back channel to the Kremlin. It is reasonable to believe they intend to have this back channel available after the inauguration as well. That means there is intent to be duplicitous; A position on Russia for public consumption versus actual coordination in secret.

    More than ever, the question becomes, “What did Trump know, and when?” Trump is certainly an idiot; at times a useful idiot to those with influence (and many times a useless idiot). Is he such a complete idiot that he would simply be at the center of his closest aides conspiring with the Russians and not be aware of this? Yes=a clueless moron of the nth degree. No=a traitor like the others.

    Congress is silent. Memorial Day weekend gives them the excuse, and a nice opportunity to wrap themselves in God, Family & Country, while the Republic burns.

    • jesterpunk
      • Phoenixdoglover

        Yes, the Seychelles. It is a lovely place. Have you ever tried to get to the Seychelles? It is a long, long way from everywhere else. An inconvenient place. A destination requiring some motivation to get there.

    • Sheepshagger

      Cmon man. A back channel that needs to be secure from monitoring by the USG? What possible use does an honest broker have for that when they’ve just been elected?

      • Phoenixdoglover

        ***scours brain for answer***

        Got nothin’.

      • yyyaz

        To send love notes outside the public eye.

        • C4TWOMAN

          Dear Putie,
          I think of you all the time. Let’s get together and screw over both our people!
          your friend,
          -Donnie

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        A discrete way to stream the pee hooker tape?

        • Sheepshagger

          I see what you did there.

          • Phoenixdoglover

            Needs moar bandwidth!

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            there’s no way a guy his age can keep the stream steady…

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          Stream me, baby.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            Don’t cross the streams…

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      I go to Josh and have for years. And, it may not be so much what did Trump know but what did Trump want to know about how, after somehow becoming president, would the Russian financiers keep quiet and let the money still flow to Trump and Jared.

  • bookish
    • Shoto

      Perhaps he caught incipient dementia from his father-in-law?

      • theCryptofishist

        Or some sort of Dorian Grey type deal.

        • C4TWOMAN

          Check his attic! Subpoenas!

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I can’t emphasize strongly enough what a deeply twisted man his father is. Like, arc of Wise Guy villain twisted.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      “I don’t recall”

      Thanks Obama Ronnie

      • Lot_49

        Liar: I didn’t do it!
        Liar w/lawyer: I have no recollection of it.

  • Shoto
    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      I note his passing without mourning.

      • Shoto

        Copy that.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          Yeah. It’s just….urrg. How in the world did we come to this place?

          • TJ Barke

            Fox News. And all similar enterprises.

          • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

            Hate Media, Aye.

    • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend

      Hey, great game, thanks for playing.

  • C4TWOMAN

    If this was a made for TV movie, where are we at now?

    Things have turned sour for our “heroes”. Victorious and in the WH, they are beset by enemies on all sides and are unable to advance their agenda. And now, intrepid reporters and dodged intelligence agencies are uncovering all the foreign connections that helped them rise to power.

    Yet, they are still able to rally their base, large groups of stubbornly ignorant people who are well armed and convinced the heroes are patriots.

    What happens when our “heroes” face being forcibly removed from the WH?

    • Sheepshagger

      Thunder Run by the first rascal brigade?

    • I think we have to watch the next season of House of Cards to find out what happens next…

      • C4TWOMAN

        Dammit. I hate cliff hangers like this.

    • Manhattan123

      The zombie apocalypse should be breaking out any moment now. That should take care of most of the goobers.

  • Manhattan123
    • mancityRed6

      pfft, like they’d have a phone on the wall. get serious.

      • JCfromNC

        Especially not one with a cord, amirite?

      • Sheepshagger

        They’ve probably had terrible accidents with all their electronics all of a sudden. Such a coincidence.

        • mancityRed6

          *Jared casts a mean side eye to the microwave*
          Ivanka says, “Honey, stop, we’ve talked about this.”
          Microwave says, “confirmed.”

        • theCryptofishist

          One of them has one of those electrical fields that fries em.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Hm, I think they look better.

      • theCryptofishist

        Almost human, even.

  • mancityRed6

    I just don’t get it, why would you wear pants that completely hid those fabulous shoes?
    http://www.plaidstallions.com/images/fm/gamblers.jpg

    • JCfromNC

      50% polyester, 50% rayon, huh? Height of luxury, that is.

      • mancityRed6

        oil embargo? what oil embargo?

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      “Yes it’s Mint Green, Motherfucker.”

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      The man in blue, it almost looks like his sideburns run into the lapels.

      • Phoenixdoglover

        Hey now, these are real mean, confidant in their masculinity, but maybe not in their height.

        • JCfromNC

          Yeah, you gotta be pretty confident in your masculinity to pull that look off. Even back then.

        • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

          xD

    • Carpe Vagenda

      This explains so much about how Trump got into the casino business. Well, that and probably money laundering.

  • mancityRed6
    • Phoenixdoglover

      This is great stuff. I lived in Baltimore 1972-77, in a series of crappy apartments in a marginal neighborhood. I would like to see the purple velour suit, with feathered cap, make a comeback. To be paired with the Cadillac Sedan Deville, complete with lantern hood ornaments, shag rug on the dash, and foam dice.

      We are going Uptown tonight!

    • guppy06
  • Shoto
  • Blackest Noobs

    someone needs to lessen the Boss’s Adderall dosage y’all:

    https://twitter.com/AdamParkhomenko/status/867958949659541508

    • Shoto

      Dude’s trippin’…

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Mom! Grandpa has the car keys!

      • vivian

        “Hmm. I’m hungry. How long do you microwave a shoe?”

        • Phoenixdoglover

          Depends.

          • sw19wilson

            That’s for dessert.

          • yyyaz

            Ummmm, tastes like pussy!

        • theCryptofishist

          Just remember to soak it first.

    • La forza del resistino

      Looks like my Granddad leaving the Golden Corral after one too many desserts.

    • MilwaukeeKent

      Almost seems like at some point Netanyahu, in private, told him they’ve got a copy of the tape from his good friend Vladimir. He seems…deflated, defeated, de fool…

  • TheGrandWazoo2

    This is honestly the one time I’d like to see Trump’s face…when he was informed of the WaPo stories tonight.

    • Shoto

      He’s so stupid and crazy and demented that it may not have registered.

    • Nounverb911
    • snark-lurker

      these peeps are so stupid and arogant that they are not even concerned

    • yyyaz

      The only time I will ever want to see his face is when there is a cop’s hand on the top of his greasy cranium as he is shoved into the back seat of a nondescript 4-door sedan in handcuffs.

      • JCfromNC

        Kind of like the only time I want to see his name and “president” in the same sentence is if it reads “disgraced former President”.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      The ledes in the stories in the WaPo have been reading just like the old Watergate days. So for many reasons, I am beginning to see how this all ends.

      • snark-lurker

        But these days are not those days, and these Repulicans are not either.

        • OrdinaryJoe

          Well. When it started back then, they weren’t either. It was the prospect of their party flushing down the toilet, along with their cushy DC jobs drinking the lobbyist’s food, drinking their booze and banging their hoe’s, that brought them to enlightenment.

          • snark-lurker

            I willl take your word for that and hope you’re right.

  • mrFawkes

    I believe the odds are eleventy quintillion to one that our two most famous/infamous Jareds will both be in prison. But it’s happening.

  • FauxAntocles

    What the fuck is going on with the Russian Republican party?!?

    • JCfromNC

      They chased most of the career politicians (the ones who cared about governance) out, and replaced them with hacks who only care about getting and holding onto power, that’s what.

      • vivian

        …or access to that sweet Russian dosh…

        • JCfromNC

          True. Power and money.

      • Stulexington

        They didn’t put up much of a fight. They didn’t make much of a stink. They retired quietly and watched their party taken over by zealots.

    • TJ Barke

      Well, they hate post New Deal America, and are doing everything they can to return to pre New Deal America, i.e. The Gilded Age.

      • SisterArtemis

        Well, picking Trump certainly suggests that’s the direction they want to go. I think I’ve mentioned before that imho Trump dies his hair to match all the gold crap.
        http://talkofnaija.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/trump-home.jpg

        • yyyaz

          Clairol No. 45Z: “Morning Piss.”

          • JCfromNC

            Apropos of nothing in particular, but your comment suddenly reminded me of a poster I saw from an event, where they compared the color of your piss to the color of various beers. The reddish beer was “You’re dehydrated! Drink more water!” and the stout was “See your doctor immediately.”

        • Phoenixdoglover

          We elected someone who lives in that. What did we expect?

          • Yr. Gma

            Not me.

          • SisterArtemis

            “We?”
            I protest quite vigorously!

          • theCryptofishist

            Ditt to the o.

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          Those interiors are not opulence, they are obscene.

          • theCryptofishist

            And tacky, tacky, tacky. No, Donnie is not a “metrosexual.” This is one straight guy who will never have a helpful “queer eye.” And I’m up past my bedtime spewing out crap.

        • guppy06

          Dye? It came that color when he bought it!

    • MilwaukeeKent

      Soviet Republicans, from Russian Limbaugh on down.

  • Alt-dog

    OT: What the fuck is wrong with people?:

    Dress code, series of events lead to honor roll student’s suspension

    HARRISBURG, N.C. – A senior at Hickory Ridge High School in Harrisburg, North Carolina, worries her college future is in jeopardy, and it’s all stemming from a shirt she wore.

    On Wednesday, Summer wore a green shirt that rests just off the tops of her shoulders and exposes her collarbone.

    http://www.ksdk.com/life/dress-code-series-of-events-lead-to-honor-roll-students-suspension/441126120

    • JCfromNC

      I love calling North Carolina home…

      …except for when I read (with increasing frequency) stories like these.

      • Alt-dog

        NC has a lot to offer. I’m heading to that part of the country in a couple weeks and looking forward to some bicycling on the Blue Ridge Parkway.

        • JCfromNC

          Yeah, for the longest time the tourism department’s slogan was “Variety Vacationland — From the Mountains to the Sea.” The NC mountains are lovely, my wife is from there originally and is determined to go back when we retire.

        • AnnieGetYerFun

          Just be sure to wear your burqa.

    • Rasilom

      God I hate this dress code shit. When I was in HS (private boarding type) we had a dress code. No jeans, cords or slacks only with no holes. Shirt had to be collared. Hair could not be longer than shoulder length for males (it was a co-ed school) things like that. Me being the bastart that I am I took to wearing my concert t-shirts with a flannel collered shirt over them. The flannel wan not buttoned.just tucked in. I wore the belt.and cords and kept my hair about 1/2 inch longer than regs allowed but there was no way they could prove it. When the dean of boys called me on it.in my senior year I asked him what I was doing wrong. He said you never button your shirt. I said show me un the regs where that is required. He said it.is implyed. I said if it aint spelled out it.aint a rule. He got pissed and called the dean of students. I was not supprised when the dean of students told him I had him over a barrel and he needed to back off. I loved Mr. Simon, Dean of Students even before that, but.even more after.

    • theCryptofishist

      Did you read about that girl in Texas who was given a joke award “Most Likely to Become a Terrorist”?

  • Nounverb911

    Coming soon to a Texas near you: “The Seriously Odd Couple”

    https://twitter.com/oliverdarcy/status/868214536972709888

  • OrdinaryJoe
  • Ninja0980

    Jared’s been a very, very naughty boy.
    Time for him to be sent to his room… for 20 to 30 years.

  • jesterpunk
  • IdiokraticDrumpfenJugend
  • AnnieGetYerFun

    “Kislyak reportedly was taken aback by the suggestion of allowing an American to use Russian communications gear at its embassy or consulate — a proposal that would have carried security risks for Moscow as well as the Trump team.”

    Something actually took a Tussian spy by surprise.

  • Pat_Pending

    I love the nation’s daughter and her deef old man…

  • delete your account probably

    You guys. I have … I have found the best Trump supporter gif?

    https://twitter.com/BettyBowers/status/868234571032272896

    • delete your account probably

      I mean, in THEORY there is a better possible gif. But the maths is pretty brutal.

    • JCfromNC

      Someone beat you to posting it here, but yeah, it’s hy-larious.

      • delete your account probably

        No, you lie. I was first.

      • TJ Barke

        This is at least the third time it’s been posted on the wonkette.

        • delete your account probably

          No you lie, this was the first time.

          • TJ Barke

            No poster! No poster! You’re the poster!

        • JCfromNC

          But in defense, it’s funny every time I see it.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz
      • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

        That is EXACTLY what I did the first time I managed to ride a bicycle. Straight into a telephone pole.

        • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

          Is that what’s wrong with you?

          • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

            Is there something wrong with me? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with me…*walks away muttering to himself*

      • delete your account probably

        granted, that is nigh perfect – but the angry dude is wearing a MAGA hat. It’s NIGHER perfect.

        • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

          Wonkette needs to run a contest to define a new meaning to the MAGA acronym.

          • delete your account probably

            you’re just gonna let me inventing the word “nigher” slide? I wouldn’t. I’d kick my ass.

          • dirtdog

            Subtle. Don’t know if it will stick, but I get it and support using it carefully.

          • theCryptofishist

            I just can’t appreciate your restraint in now going for “nigher perfecter.”

          • HogeyeGrex

            My favorite so far has been Morons Are Governing America.

            I’m open to changing that.

    • Crank Tango

      Is that even America, to be made great again?

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Classic.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Their “team” won control of the House, Senate and WH plus the majority of Governorships and they are still seething with rage and anger as if they have been slighted! They don’t have one ounce of gratitude and will never realize that if they are walking around with that much hatred and intolerance of others there is something wrong with THEM not others!

      • Rasilom

        This is truth. Hard core plain and simple hard bitting truth.

    • TootsStansbury

      That moron’s um definitely MAGA! Scary thing is, they’re all going to be mighty pissed at us for their stupidity.

  • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

    Ima go to bed now. Be well, Everypony. :)

    • JCfromNC

      G’night! Pleasant dreams.

    • jesterpunk

      Have a good night Anna.

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    I don’t understand why this is a problem. He’s just trying to cut through some red tape.

    • TJ Barke

      All the way to the Russian bank…

    • Alt-dog

      Emphasis on the Red.

  • bookish

    From tonight, the Friday Mini-Report, at The Rachel Maddow Show.

    It’s been fascinating to watch Michael Gerson express growing dismay over the direction of his party: “Those conservatives who believe that the confirmation of Justice Neil M. Gorsuch is sufficient justification for the Trump presidency are ignoring Trump’s psychic and moral destruction of the conservative movement and the Republican Party. Clinton, with a small number of changed votes, would have defeated Republicans. But Trump is doing a kind of harm beyond anything Clinton could have done. He is changing the party’s most basic moral and political orientations. He is shaping conservatism in his image and ensuring an eventual defeat more complete, and an eventual exile more prolonged, than Democrats could have dreamed.”

    • Carpe Vagenda

      tl;dr: People, this shit is supposed to be a dog whistle.

    • TJ Barke

      Motherfucker, this shit has been percolating for fucking decades.

    • La forza del resistino

      They won’t be happy until they find a youngish replacement for RBG. How old is Scott Baio anyways?

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Bullshit. He’s not “shaping conservatism”. He’s the end result of 30 years of conservative evolvement. He’s their Frankenstein monster and I hope he burns the whole fucking GOP down!

      • MilwaukeeKent

        It can be both, Republicans can chew and gum at the same time.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        That’s the part none of these assholes can admit to, Donnie is the inevitable culmination of the last several decades of conservative machinations

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Leopard cubs who nominate Leopards Who Eat Their Young surprised when feasting begins.

  • delete your account probably
    • TJ Barke

      If that shit hasn’t already been shredded, they really are totally incompetent.

      • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

        Then it hasn’t been shredded.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I have no doubt that the Trump administration will comply with the subpoena and immediately produce all the requested documents…

      • delete your account probably

        I think we just hit Peak Snark.

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          I’ll take that as a compliment.

      • 3FingerPete

        Or send another certified letter. Those things are magical.

        • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

          That would really be bringing out the heavy artillery…

        • Stulexington

          Why not both? A small selection of documents and a certified letter that that’s all of them.

          • puredog

            Or just a couple of documents, followed by “In order to show you the most relevant results, we have omitted some entries very similar to the 2 already displayed.”

    • guppy06

      Documents?

      “All work and no play makes Jared a dull boy.”

  • jesterpunk
    • MilwaukeeKent

      I’m sure of it. That is fucked up beyond belief, and yet it’ll be a mere footnote when the books are writ on the damage this administration has done. At one point the police spokesman says (paraphrasing), “We don’t know if he has mental health issues, we don’t know if he under the influence of alcohol or drugs, or all of the above…” I would add Trump to that all of the above.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Ivanka, girl, you might want more support. But who am I to judge, you hooked a millionaire real estate developer with that look.

  • Marla

    Comparative erudition

  • Marla

    Jared, it’s time to get out of the military for this scheme and to postpone your Mexican wedding

  • OrdinaryJoe

    In the midst of all this shit, a friend sent this to me today. Just keep saying to yourself there is good out there and this will get better.

    https://youtu.be/–oXHLZU6UE

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Dumb Corleone’s wife…er daughter…no I was right the first time…looks really sweaty in that photo. I didn’t realize that women of her stature sweated. Is that even allowed?

    • SisterArtemis

      No. Jail her immediately (does not apply to the rest of us schlubs, who may sweat as much as we please)

  • Alt-dog

    Lack of sleep causes your brain to eat itself

    On that note, I think I’ll call it a night.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      So, my CPAP machine is full of dead brain cells?

      • Rasilom

        That and microscopic snot nodules. yes I just went there. Lol One of my IT clients is a sleep doc. My office is in his office. He has a clinic space in Juneau that was a full medical clinic. He closed it down when he switched to sleep medicine, about 4000 square feet and he is the only one working there now so I took over a third of the space and reduced his monthly contract support as payment. I’ll tell you this there is a room 15 feet from my desk that has about.30 cpap machines and 500 replacement masks of varìous types. I just wish he would stop calling at 5am to ask why his PC restarted with the message required by Windows updates :-)

        • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

          Five AM, huh? What time would you like him to call?
          Oh, wait….

          • Rasilom

            No earlier that 11am. Us night owls need our beauty sleep.

    • I’ve heard that Trump doesn’t sleep much.

    • delete your account probably

      I’ve always relied on powerful narcotics to eat my brain, personally.

      • theCryptofishist

        I voted for the Leopards Eating People’s Brains party. I realize there’s billions of humans and not so very many leopards, but sooner or later, my brain will be eaten.

  • Of course Comrade Trump needed a secure line with Putin. Do you think either wanted to be spied upon by their common enemy, the United States?

    • Khavrinen

      Grifters don’t refer to them as “enemies”; the term is “marks”.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    ^^ Is that the picture he takes with him to prison?

    • delete your account probably

      Of course not. There are two other people wasting space in that photo.

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
    • delete your account probably

      What you are seeing there is the birth of an engineer.

      No, really.

    • Me The People

      This is a leafblower, not a chainsaw, right?

  • Jennifer R

    Comcast is now blocking the FCC comments site at the base level.

    • jesterpunk

      Which one? I just tried gofccyourself.com and it went to the fcc comment site.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I have Comcast and I was able to submit a comment. Try this link:
      https://www.fcc.gov/ecfs/filings/express

  • OrdinaryJoe

    WWJBD? What would James Bond do?

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • I had to pause till I stopped laughing at Jeff Sessions.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        *land o’ cotton”

  • Carpe Vagenda

    So, Clickhole, if you’re not familiar, is the Onion’s new wingnut news parody site.

    https://twitter.com/scottdools/status/868125786322219009

    • phoenix00

      Trolls trolling trolls trolling trolls trolling trolls trolling trolls…….

      • Carpe Vagenda

        It’s trolls all the way down.

        When reached for comment, administration spox Snorri Underbridge replied “You triggered, snowflake?”

        • ez

          Trolling, trolling, trolling. Keep that Fake News rolling, you Trolls!
          (you might have to be old as dust to be able to sing this to the theme from “Rawhide”)

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Maybe half as old as dust. They used it in the Blues Brothers movie.

          • ez

            True, calmed those red necks in the Bunker Bar right the heck down too.

        • phoenix00

          > Snorri Underbridge

          *chuckles

  • btwbfdimho

    Question before zzzzzz: why Jared needs a secret phone when he barely talks?
    Asking for a friend who barely comments.
    Goodnight rOOm.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    Did someone play a joke on these people ? Was there a note attached to the background check form that says “If you’ve had any contact with the Russians, don’t mention it on the form” ?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Sessions – who if I remember my civics is a law enforcement officer of some sort – says he perjured himself on Russia because someone told him to.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        World’s Worst Attorney.

        • theCryptofishist

          He had an African American ringer take the bar for him.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            If only this were true. I can only imagine that the AL and MS bar exams are multiple choice, with only two choices.
            FL will not give interchange attorney or medical licenses with other states and the given reason is that they don’t want a flood of professionals retiring to Florida expecting to keep working. So to work in Florida, they have to be willing to be reexamined. But I think it’s because they don’t want to make it easy for competent lawyers and doctors to relocate there.

          • LucindathePook

            Accountants, too, my FIL had to retake exam there.

        • Msgr_MΩment

          Not even worthy to be Attorney Buckprivate.

    • Kakkeltje

      Ha, you would think you that is the most ridiculous thing ever, but I believe that was actually the defense Jeff Sessions used for ‘forgetting’ to disclose his Russian contacts.

    • All of these people are just the worst. That’s the explanation. They are all just terrible, stupid pathological liars.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Aw, geez. My beloved @maggienyt has a hot take out about how her buddy Jared was just trying to get a line through for his buddy Mike Flynn to wage peace in Syria.

    Is it too much to hope that people from the Times get indicted before this is over?

    • theCryptofishist

      They’ll always have the curse of MoDo.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        True. Although Judy Miller did kill more people.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      You’re kidding, right?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Nope.

    • NYT seems to be running with the idea that poor little rich boy is just too dumb and naive about the complicated ways of foreign policy to understand why he shouldn’t do these things.

      This fails on several levels. 1.) It’s a lie. Dumb the Trump administration may be, but they are corrupt and compromised in addition to dumb. B.) It’s not an excuse. As anyone knows if they’ve ever tried telling a traffic cop that they didn’t see that speed limit sign, ignorance of the law is no excuse for breaking it. And III) Even if they were really just that dumb and not intentionally evil, and even if dumbness was an excuse for illegal activity, people that dumb have no business running a government. And people who appoint people that dumb have no business running a government either.

      They all need to go. Now. I don’t even give a shit where to – they can defect to Russia at this point. But they need to get their stupid treasonous gang of idiots out of our White House. The NYT can go with them, for all I care.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        and people who baldfaced lie on behalf of people that dumb should shut the fuck up about politics and write the fucking social news. I’m sure Ivanka can get her an interview at Conde Nast.

  • Carpe Vagenda
  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Whew. Rock&roll at a southside workingman’s joint….sweaty, stinky, drunk. Has Jared been taken out and shot for treason yet?

    • bookish

      Not yet. But I’m ready to slap him around a bit.

    • NastyBossetti

      Check out this band if they’re coming near you. They’re on tour now, and they put on a great show:
      http://www.askultura.com/shows

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Man! That is some wack, crazy-good drummer they got. Cool stuff….I bet their live shows are great. Checked their tour schedule…they are playing some REALLY odd places out west…Murray, Utah and Shiprock, N.M., but nothing in AZ. I’ll keep my eyes open, thx.

        • NastyBossetti

          They had many more cities listed initially, which makes me wonder if they still hope to fill in some dates and just need to find/book venues. But definitely worth catching if they do end up nearby.

  • Skaarphy

    I honestly believe Jared was just trying to prevent WW3. Honestly. I kid you not. Not one bit.

    • Sheepshagger

      David Niven recounted a story of being out with his beloved niece, all of four years old, when they came on the awkward sight of two dogs energetically fucking on the pavement. What do you say? Niven, being an actor and a gentleman, answered his niece’s enquiry thus:

      “Well darling, unfortunately the little dog in front has gone suddenly blind, but his very good friend is pushing him all the way to the royal hospital for the blind”.

      You might be that niece.

      • Skaarphy

        I might. But then again, you might (turn on your irony detector). Funny story though. :-)

  • freakishlypersistent

    These fucking gaslighting monsters have to go, and that means ALL of them. They have no respect, and outright contempt for the American people, our institutions, our Democracy. The “President” has stated that a free press is the enemy of the people and trashed our justice system repeatedly. Hugh Hewitt was given a platform on MSNBC to test the sycophant, grovelling talking point that Jared was just establishing a “back channel”. Yeah, one with no pesky U.S. involvement. Note to anyone that supports Trump and his ilk, he’s on THEIR side, and you are not a patriot.

    • SisterArtemis

      I’d like to see Hewitt say that with Malcom Nance (and others) present. Don’t think he’d hold onto his convictions too long in the face of Those Who Actually Know How Things Work.

      • freakishlypersistent

        He didn’t even get away with it with Brian fucking Williams.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Hewitt got that from Maggie Haberman. Quite a bit of the free press isn’t.

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      BriWi was have my none of it. Shut him down and brought in an expert.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    come for the thread, stay for that shrike Cathy Young in comments concern trolling about ethics in game journalism or some lame shit like that.

    https://twitter.com/AlanaMassey/status/868246699327848448

    • Bemused Australian

      I have wondered why, given their claims to hyper-masculinity and totally being into the gurlz and stuff, why these MRAs are so upset about watching, for instance, Scarlet Johansen in skin tight leather performing various improbable acrobatic feats. They would prefer to see buff dudes with ripped shirts wrestling with each other and grunting. This raises questions.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I suspect if your social life is built on a foundation of poorly photoshopped in-jokes explicating the depthless evil of women, the cognitive dissonance is deafening.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        See, they want to see Scarlet but only in a way that isn’t too intimidating and they can’t feel compelled by the story to identify with her. So she definitely can’t be the lead and there must be a nearby dude at all times.

        • Bemused Australian

          Maybe they just need someone to tell them that it’s okay, and they don’t need bury their desires so deep that it turns them into bitter monsters. Perhaps the realisation that their raging hard-on while watching old Dolph Lundgren flicks isn’t because of the super awesome violence, but is in fact due to a state of homoerotic arousal, will set them free. Let them know that anyone who judges them for this isn’t very nice, so maybe stop doing it and just roll with the whole thing.

        • TootsStansbury

          Insecure boys with dicks the size of those baby corn cobs you find in Chinese food.

          • Bemused Australian

            I like the baby corn cobs, but now may have trouble eating them. Bah.

      • paxpax

        I DEFINITELY prefer to see buff dudes with ripped shirts wrestling with each other and grunting.

      • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

        Like all those 1980s Action movies with Schwarzenegger, Stallone, etc. shirtless, olied-up muscles, pumping away with phallic-symbol machine guns…..

    • Oh gawd, these whiners and Wonder Women. Fuck them. There are still plenty of all-malw no women allowed strongholds, including the goddamn White House. We can have one screening of one movie once.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        There’s one star in comments – with Young defending him against all comers, the curdled contrarian little dear – fighting on the twin fronts that

        it’s an unconscionable abrogation of his rights that if he felt like it, he couldn’t fly across the country to attend this one particular screening, so arrant sexism is keeping him from choosing to view exactly the media he chooses in exactly the way he chooses, and

        the Ghostbusters remake should not have been made, because he doesn’t think it was necessary.

        • puredog

          Kind of OT, but it’s sort of in the nature of the beast, that is, if the first movie was good enough to inspire the “homage” of a remake, it probably doesn’t need one. The second Ghorstbusters (which I didn’t see) at least had a twist on the first which made it plausibly watchable.

  • freakishlypersistent

    And while we’re watching Trump dismantle NATO and behave like a first rate buffoon:
    Mitch and the boys, after destroying Congress and backing up over it and running it over again are now going after the Federal judicial;

    Senate Republicans are considering overhauling a long-standing tradition for processing judicial nominees to thwart potential Democratic obstruction of President Trump’s picks to fill the federal bench. Ironically, it’s a custom GOP lawmakers themselves took advantage of to block numerous judicial nominees under President Obama, creating the glut of vacancies on the bench they now seek to help Trump fill.

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/dc/republican-senators-blue-slip-changes-trump-judges

    • TootsStansbury

      They have to be carefully fought.
      Edited to sound more like the song title. It’s early.

    • Sheepshagger

      See I don’t have the answer, and the one that occurs to me is unpalatable, but I think I see the question very clearly now. And the question for all decent people is how do we deal with utterly unprincipled opponents? It’s a perplexing one because being utterly disgraceful is a huge advantage. If you feel no allegiance to the rules, or the truth or convention then you can do anything. And you can turn around and do the opposite tomorrow. How do you oppose that? And more importantly how do you do it without becoming just as disgraceful as what you stand against? Now it seems to me that the only answer for the democrats is to completely drive the republicans out of power and put the torch to them politically- full Sherman, scorched earth, no survivors. And the only way to do that is to fucking win. And in this climate of black disinformation and voter suppression and generally despicable behaviour by the right I think the only thing for it is that the left have to unite on a clear simple economic program and make a heroic effort to sweep the midterms- ride or die. If I had to posit one I’d say three points – full employment, socialised health care, free education for all, the rich are paying. No apologies, no compromise. No weasel words.

      I apologise for ranting, but Jesus fucking Christ. Someone’s gotta get this shit in hand.

      • freakishlypersistent

        This one is pure Mitch, (sorry Michigan travel board..)

  • Carpe Vagenda
  • Me The People

    What will Kushner’s ‘reason’ for this be? Im guessing it might be something like “Obama made such a mess of national security that I had to go to the Russians to set up a communication channel that wouldn’t be compromised by ISIS”.

    • Sheepshagger

      “I don’t recall” is what he’s currently going with.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        With a side of “Can you please provide me with specific detailed information about your interception of the Ambassador’s communications?”

        • guppy06

          Y’see, we were all passing the Ambassador’s communications to the left-hand side, but then the president yelled “Interception!”

        • Sheepshagger

          He’s plainly shitting himself. Not recalling means he did it. It’s not that hard to thi I back six months and remember that I haven’t tried to use the Russian embassy as a secure black line. I’m sure Jared could manage that if it weren’t true. And if it were even remotely legitimate there’s no reason to hide. So he’s fucked I’d guess. Many are suggesting it’s a tip that Flynn has already flipped, cause he was the other one there.

          • Resistance Fighter Astraea

            To be fair, who among us can remember all the times we’ve requested back channels with enemies and adversaries of our country?

          • Sheepshagger

            I once smuggled a Pavlova into the dressing room of the springboks, but that’s another whole thing.

          • puredog

            IKR? I mean, I did, and I’d forgotten I had, but at least this story jogged my memory.

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            All they had to do was threaten Flynn with court marshal and loss of his pension to get him to agree to civil court proceedings.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            and wouldn’t that be the ultimate? Joe Freedom could talk himself into selling his country out of pique, but now it’s not the country he swore an oath to on the line, it’s his own lily white ass.

            Wonder what the kid knows.

        • Stulexington

          And please speak clearly into this innocuous looking lapel pin when you do.

    • guppy06

      Family loyalty being what it is, the reason he’ll give is “President Daddy told me to do it,” no matter what the real reason may be.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        ISWYDT

  • not_vh
    • The Wanderer

      He was a Zbig man, who thought Zbig thoughts.

      • not_vh

        I’ll keep my peace for today.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Another Clinton murder? When will that monster stop?

      Also, how did his daughter end up canoodling with a Republican, and hanging out with Trump at Mar-a-lago.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Scarborough. Desperately trying to catch up to the Clintons.

  • Joycejprendergast

    Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !sm245c:
    On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. Follow this link for more information
    !sm245c:
    ➽➽
    ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialCashJobs545DirectMastersGetPaid$97/Hour ★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫::::::!sm245c:….,…..

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      Joyce, I have your son here. Every time you post, you will receive one of his fingers. Until they run out, and then…

    • Master Contrail Program

      I’m sorry my dear, I don’t remember. For you the day Joycejprendergast got a new Land Rover Range Rover was the most significant day of your life. But for me it was Tuesday.

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    In today”s installment of “No, I Don’t Know What It Means Either,” the occasional series in which I post the nonsensical words or phrases that crop up in my head just at the moment of waking, a single word: “existy.” In this case I do know what it means: an adjective, understood to be pejorative, for something whose mere existence offends, e. g. “Yuck, the world is just too existy today.”

  • Somecallmetim

    I went to the discount lobotomy clinic to get my shame skiffed off to the Baltic . Now all those victories I thought I had are gone.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Okey dokey.

  • bookish

    “Both Flynn and Kushner are extremely naive if they think a covert communications channel can be set up at Russian diplomatic facilities in the U.S. without the FBI finding out,” said David Gomez, a former FBI agent and a fellow at George Washington University’s Center for Cyber and Homeland Security.

    The potential security implications of Kushner’s reported proposal, experts said, are significant.

    “It is inconceivable that a White House official who had done this, not at the president’s direction, would continue to work there,” said Hennessey. “What happens to Kushner now will be incredibly revealing about the extent to which political accountability and the rule of law continue to apply in the White House.”

    • Sheepshagger

      “Significant”. Yes, I’d say so.

    • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

      “It is inconceivable that a White House official who had done this, not at the president’s direction, would continue to work there,” said Hennessey.

      Who said the president didn’t know?

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        I think they mean now. If Just Jared stays there and isn’t fired, it is tacit evidence that Dolt 45 is in on it all.

      • Elvis Causticfellow

        I think his point is that Jared’s not having been fired already indicates that the president almost certainly would have known, at least if we were talking about a normal president.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Naive? How about stupid?

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Will the Trump White House really punish Kushner? Well, considering that Trump is still pining for Flynn, I doubt it. Which is fine by me if it means all the co-conspirators will go down with the ship. That’s more preferable to any one of those shitweasels making a sweetheart deal to escape getting their just desserts.

    • Stulexington

      You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
  • Ω cynmac will never surrender

    This bears repeating:

    I’m going to be in DC next weekend for the March for Truth on June 3rd. Any other Wonketteers going? Wanna have a drinky thing? Send me an email to cynmac zero seven at gmail dot com with subject “DC March for Truth – Wonkette Drinky Thing” so we can make a plan!!
    I’z Excite.

  • Sheepshagger
    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      Pouring in already? Did they put it directly into his pocket

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        I didn’t know Russia was in NATO nowadays.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Where are those lawyerly babysitters that are supposed to hold his dick phone for him? Huh? We were promised lawyers.

      • Sheepshagger

        In Sicily the lawyers get forgetful.

    • Master Contrail Program

      Awesome that he’s tweeting about protection money, from Sicily.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        He made them an offer they couldn’t refuse?

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      I see what he did there. Money is pouring in for him all right, but he didn’t specifically say it was from NATO members.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Have you seen the video of him wandering off on the second day while in Israel? Or him sleeping in a G7 meeting yesterday?
      It’s fucking embarrassing.

      • Sheepshagger

        Store up your nuts for a very long winter.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          I don’t have nut… Oh what mean there.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Aww like reassuring a kid when you put him to sleep. “Yes honey, tomorrow we will go looking for the end of the rainbow.”

    • not_vh

      Don’t take it literally. Luxembourg prolly back-channeled a few no nothings to him via the missus.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      FAKE NEWS! They were increasing spending already. #ThanksObama

      FAKE NEWS! He lost his fucken mind long ago. Alzheimers. Or syphilis. Or Agent Orange exposure.

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Why not all three: Alzheimer’s + syphilis + Agent Orange ( or whatever they spray him with to make him that color).

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Fun Fact: “Agent Orange” is his FSB code name.

    • TootsStansbury

      NATO will be much stronger when you, Putin and the rest of your sick band of fascist fucksticks stop meddling with it and are punished for having done it.

  • Sheepshagger

    Oh hey have you had your dose of irrational fear today? DHS delivers now. https://twitter.com/cnn/status/868418003528011776

    • Michael R

      Orange Alert !!!

      • not_vh

        iswdt

    • freakishlypersistent

      I hate leaving the house now, I’m terrified of Republicans.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Oh fuck off with the fear-mongering! I’m apt to never leave my house based on what we already know about the Stoopids running the country and the subliterates who support them. But we do what we gotta do, right?

    • Mary Theresa

      Some good old fashioned fear mongering to go with that first cup of coffee.

      • not_vh

        or the second beer, depending on the time zone.

        • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

          You must be in California.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Home of the brave indeed.

      A better reason to never leave the house is the extraordinary levels of gun violence in this country. You are a billion times* more likely to be killed by a gun than by a terrorist.
      ___________________________________
      * Bitzy Duh-vos aporoved math

      • YoBunnyBunny

        But getting shot is a privilege of FREEDUMB!!!1!1!!

      • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

        Not to mention car accidents.

        • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

          EXACTLY! If “saving American lives” at the expense of traditional American values is the penultimate goal of policies such as deporting undocumented moms, refugee bans, SYG laws, etc … then we can save many more lives by making the national speed limit 10 MPH.

      • RobKanC

        Fake News! Bitzy Duh-vos math goes like this. Guns kill 0 people each year. Its people using guns that kill people.

        • YoBunnyBunny

          And BEARZ!1!1!! BEARZ kill the people when they’re not killing our porridges!!1!1!!!!

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Thanks, John!
      –Terrorists everywhere

    • TootsStansbury

      Well, most of go shopping on the Internet nowadays anyway.

    • Sophia

      Most people are already too afraid to leave the house because you never know what trump and the republicans are going to come up with next to fuck up your life

    • AJ Milne

      That demagogues and authoritarians cook up lurid and graphic but statistically negligible risks into looming, existential threats largely to cement their own power?

      Guy? We know. In practical terms, mostly it means, before I leave the house, I check what _they’re_ up to lately.

    • Alan

      Bullshit.

    • Anna Elizabeth, Tank Grrl

      Fucking Coward says what?

    • puredog

      Eh, he’s just teeing up the Election Day red alert in blue enclaves.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    editrix of the nation’s premier mommyblog and recipe hub

    Factcheck.org and Snopes say this is false (FIVE Pinocchios). Wonket is the world’s premier mommyblog and recipe hub.

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    “Russia betrayed Jared by leaking about my secret calls to V.P. So I will tell A.G. Jeff to lock Russia up for TREASON!” #DeletedTrumpTweets

  • Bemused Australian
    • Mary Theresa

      LOL, wtf?

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Honey Badger don’t care.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Now that’s a headline!

    • RobKanC

      I knew Badgers were tough. But come on, they don’t eat humans. right? right?

      • At the crossroads, stay strong

        It’s the extremely rare giant Ramsay eating badger. They’re rare because of the rarity of sex dwarfs.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          I wonder is the Badger was disappointed that it was Imitation Ramsay?

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      How does one go about finding their own sex dwarf?

      Asking for a friend.

      • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

        craigslist

        But be careful. Sometimes the pictures are fake. And if you scroll down you can see the “dwarf” is not what you think.

    • The Wanderer

      Badger badger badger . . .

      It’s almost as good as Truck plows into company AnalTech, releasing foul odor.

    • Master Contrail Program

      Honey badger don’t care. He takes what he wants.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        She also too.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Our long national nightmare is over.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Obligatory: Badgers? We don’t need no stinkin’ badgers.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      TRUE FACT: “Sex dwarf” is what Donald Trump calls his penis.

    • Michael R
      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        It would be irresponsible not to speculate!

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
  • Sophia
    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Just more of the same: treason, lying, betrayal, nepotism, ineptitude, duplicity, hypocrisy, irresponsibility, immaturity, pussy grabbing.

      • Sophia

        ah, so I didn’t miss anything then

    • The Wanderer

      Eh, the usual fuckery; nothing really new. I’m watching the practice for the Monaco Grand Prix.

      • Sophia

        Not real familiar with this but I’d guess it’s somewhat like the trump administration and everyone is going in circles?

        • The Wanderer

          It’s actually more interesting than the Trump Regime. Mercedes are scratching their heads, wondering how they can be doing worse in the second practice.

          • Sophia

            Mercedes is that one of those evil German cars?

          • The Wanderer

            Apparently.

    • freakishlypersistent

      Doggie makes me talk funny and say “nomnomnom”..

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Downloaded and is my screen in Messenger today.

  • chascates

    How long before Trump just quits and walks away?
    “Melania, I can’t make America great again because of reasons! Melania? Melania???”

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/fc7ccb65931701e7e431fc02c13ed9cdf9bde4a634b34535b248b7605a0e362f.jpg

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    This is a picture of my wife with our cat Milo. I feel it should be posted here on grounds of adorbsness. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f2e606b4aed6465c4d5b34da31254b9c73c8b97df7754bea91027a013c6b2706.jpg

    • Mary Theresa

      Too cute.

    • TootsStansbury

      Awww. Whatever you do, DO NOT WUB DA BELLIED!

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Hell, I don’t even know her.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      “The New Yorker” — your wife’s or the cat’s?

      • Elvis Causticfellow

        Milo is more of a Guns and Ammo type.

  • chascates
    • The Wanderer

      Dumb fuck. Some NATO nations have already met their commitments.

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      That last one reminds me of a very early R. Crumb comic where a guy on the teevee news is saying “Important decisions were made today by mighty world leaders.”

    • freakishlypersistent

      Is NATO a fucking protection racket now? Does BabyDonald think they write a check to to U.S. or something? Fuck him.

      • Apple Scruff

        “Money is beginning to pour in”

        Christalmighty. I just can’t anymore.

        Can we get this impeaching thing going already?

        • freakishlypersistent

          Right? Pour in WHERE, BabyDonald? Jesus Christ. And 63,00,000 still support that.

      • Khavrinen

        “Nice European Union you got here. Be a shame if something were to … happen to it, you know?”

    • Apple Scruff

      “Very important matters”

      His 3rd grade vocabulary never ceases to amaze embarrass me.

      • freakishlypersistent

        “Germany is bad, very bad”..

      • The Wanderer

        “We’re talking about LOTS of neat stuff.”

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        “Have a great summer. See you next year.”

        • Apple Scruff

          More like — “Have a gr8 summer. C U next year.”

    • Sophia

      Doesn’t have on there whether he plans to stay awake or not

    • Michael R

      So no one is laughing at you ?

    • Me The People

      Details, fucknut. Exactly who is making special payments to – who exactly? and for what amounts? Cause we’d hate to think you were just making shit up to save face on account of everyone ignoring your insane ramblings about NATO.

    • Bemused Australian

      The G7’s an economic forum, though occasionally dabbles in condemning Russian adventurism. What a fucking dunce.

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        There is a picture of him at a meeting asleep from yesterday.
        Allegedly, he prefers to sleep on AF1. Maybe it has a memory foam mattress.

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Call now! Operators are standing by! That number again is 1-800-BIG-WALL. Mention special code DAMPNUT, and receive a real gold color tinfoil hat. One size fits all!

      • Apple Scruff

        He sounds like a TV evangelist, doesn’t he?

        • Phoenixdoglover

          False assurances all around.

    • TootsStansbury

      What an embarrassing asshole he is. Ha. Auto corrected “he” to “hemail”.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      I guess those lawyers that are supposed to babysit him didn’t make it to Sicily, huh?

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    And there’s this:

    Alabama Gov. Kay Ivey (R) this week signed legislation that will preempt cities and counties from removing monuments to the Confederacy from public property, over the objections of black lawmakers and civil rights groups.

    Republicans love local control except when it comes to LGBT rights, gun safety, minimum wage, sanctuary, textbooks … and now, monuments to treason.

    http://thehill.com/homenews/state-watch/335283-alabama-moves-to-protect-confederate-monuments

    • Stay KKKlassy Alabama!

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      Alabama, you got the weight on your shoulders
      That’s breaking your back.
      Your Cadillac has got a wheel in the ditch
      And a wheel on the track.

    • TootsStansbury

      It’s shit like this that makes me think perhaps the Union isn’t worth preserving and we should go our separate ways afterall.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      And for the third time in 24 hours I post this:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJ25-U3jNWM

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Too bad we don’t have John Boehner to kick around anymore, because I love this headline:
    John Boehner: Cigarettes and Wine Are Good, Trump’s a ‘Complete Disaster’
    By Adam K. Raymond

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/05/boehner-cigarettes-good-trump-a-complete-disaster.html

    • The Wanderer

      Nice to see he’s enjoying his retirement.

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      What a guy. I really could have liked him if he hadn’t been such an asshole.

      • Sheepshagger

        Yeah aside from being a corrupt spineless bag of shit with no shame and the morals of a mongoose in a rat farm, he seemed alright.

    • Me The People

      Sounds like he’s well past the fuck-giving stage.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Plus he’s making a bundle lobbying, and doesn’t have to look at Ted Cruz’s face.

        • Me The People

          That would put a spring in anyone’s step.

    • freakishlypersistent

      Yeah, he said except in foreign policy, so, still a drunk delusional asshole. But, too librul for the whackadoodle house!

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      That’s, like your opinion, man.

  • Mary Theresa
    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      2006 and 2008 are interesting comparisons, but after 2010 Republican sweep and the computer-enhanced precision gerrymandering that followed, those aren’t necessarily good reference points.

      • Mary Theresa

        Your right, maybe Nate was drunk tweeting.

      • Me The People

        Yeah – I wonder if Nate Silver has ever tried to quantify the republican boost the 2010 redraw is responsible for?

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Agreed. I’ve stopped paying such close attention to Ole Nate.

  • Michael R
    • freakishlypersistent

      He’s got the wrong flag on his lapel..

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Plus, it’s rightside-up.

        • RobespierreHoo

          Which indicates Melania is taking a more active role in the Administration.

    • “Who knew they wouldn’t love the Greatest world leader of all time?”

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Chocolate cake? Two scoops of ice cream? So easily impressed.

    • Pilotshark

      well funny you bring that up, as we all are heading to Berlin for cake and some good conversions.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    For some reason it still shocks me that Comey would do this:
    Comey Reportedly Shaped the Clinton Probe Around Russian Intelligence That He Knew Was Fake
    By Eric Levitz

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/05/report-comey-shaped-clinton-probe-around-fake-russian-intel.html

    • Me The People

      Yep. Still can’t process the guy at all. More information isn’t helping.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        The fact that he knowingly shared DISinformation about Clinton, that resulted in the buffoon Trump becoming president really shocks me. He had to have known she was the more qualified, less lunatic, candidate. I know he’s a Republican, but I’m still shocked.

        • Ω cynmac will never surrender

          Ah, you chose “buffoon” as well. Isn’t it strange how easily that one word comes to mind…

          • The Wanderer

            Buffoon
            Poltroon
            Lampoon
            Spittoon

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            In a recent poll on what word first comes to mind when people hear the name Trump, “idiot” was the number one choice.

            Thanks, red state America! You finally elected the idiot king we’d all been longing for.

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Is there anyone associated with this “investigation” who isn’t a complete buffoon? No? ‘kay.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I’m still shocked Comey would knowingly act on information he knew was fake.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    Wow. Woke up this morning to a completely unread thread. I guess the Weekly Shabbas Political Thread is the new black.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
    • Swampgas_Man

      They’re limiting their info-sharing with Facebook to Connecticut?

  • Apple Scruff

    “He’s not very smart,” the nation’s daughters explained to their elderly fathers

    Pretty much!

    “Kahlon described her former boss on Facebook thusly: “We’re talking about a guy who isn’t particularly bright or hard-working, doesn’t actually know anything, has bought his way into everything ever (with money he got from his criminal father), who is deeply insecure and obsessed with fame (you don’t buy the NYO, marry Ivanka Trump, or constantly talk about the phone calls you get from celebrities if it’s in your nature to ‘shun the spotlight’), and who is basically a shithead.”

    “Meet the Real Jared Kushner”: http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/05/25/jared-kushner-russia-fbi-donald-trump-215191

    • Juan de Fuca

      And throws petulant glances at mean uncle Steve during picture time.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!

  • Nounverb911
    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      ….and your little seeing eye dog….

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Make
      America
      Grouchy/Gramps
      Again?

      • Elvis Causticfellow

        Making Asshole Granddads Angry?

    • Ω cynmac will never surrender

      Retweeted & Shared – Reply “Master Race? Suuuurrreee.”

    • TootsStansbury

      Mad At Good Americans. Watch out, he’s those terrists DHS is squawking about.

    • The Wanderer

      (giggles)

  • Nounverb911
  • chascates

    ABC News has learned Pres. Donald J. Trump’s sons were summoned to an emergency session at FBI – Federal Bureau of Investigation NY office about hackers trying to compromise Trump organization computers – as Trump son-in-law and Ivanka Trump husband Jared Kushner’s meetings with Russian officials come under scrutiny. Pierre Thomas reports.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QniBvEi8ZGU

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      Man, those are two guilty-looking fuckfaces.

    • The Wanderer

      “We know things, boys. You might want to stop trusting your Dad, and put your trust in the Lord and a good lawyer.”

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Yeah, because hacking into an organization’s internal information could be a bad thing….who knew?….

      • vivian

        Nobody knew it was so complicated.

    • Alan

      Did they explain in pictures with crayons?

    • Sheepshagger

      “Just don’t say nothing Eric! Those cops won’t find her”.

  • Maybe it was just some run-of-the-mill Criminal activity he wanted to keep secret?
    https://media0.giphy.com/media/JZ6RXhoSd25Xy/giphy.gif
    Nah. It was Treason

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Good Morning, Wonkettelskhugi! Hey! As one of the nation’s old dads, I hereby reserve my screaming to the local dem party meetings I go to every month. We’re looking for good candidates, and I think we’ve found one to replace our teaparty rep, here in Northern Michigan. Now, we just need a few dozen more!….

  • Master Contrail Program
  • chascates
  • Nounverb911

    Attention WONKETTA-TIFOSI!

    Happy GO-Fast day!
    https://twitter.com/F1/status/868431174925828096

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Max is fast!

      • Nounverb911

        Currently third in Q2.

        • How’s ricciardo doing? I don’t get the freaking channel!

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          Yup. I have a date at the beach in about an hour but I will watch Q3 first.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
    • Nounverb911

      So all that partnering up with the NY mob came in handy?

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Exactly.

      • Sheepshagger

        Bon jurno!

        • Toomush_Inferesistance

          Why is it “arrive a dercha” when you’re going away, then? Explain that!…..

    • Sophia

      What a fucktard

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Pizza, pasta, fiasco et presto!

        • ariel_gee_398

          Bunga bunga.

    • The Wanderer

      He might be relying on Melanoma to translate for him.

      Nahhhhh.

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Memorial Day weekend, No golf. We’ve got base metabolism; that’s about all.

    • freakishlypersistent

      Va fa en culo, fuckwit.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      It’s okay. He stayed at a Ritz-Carlton last night.

  • Nounverb911

    Also, too, Attention Wonketta-SAILORS!

    Happy GO-Fast Day.

    https://twitter.com/OracleTeamUSA/status/868208581346287622

  • Sophia

    Nap time: Trump wandered off from a meeting with Netanyahu and had to be brought back by staff.

    https://twitter.com/pacelattin/status/867949635028959232?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=http%3A%2F%2F

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    Like any reality show host he knows how to announce a cliffhanger:

    https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/868441116726710272

    • Alan

      WTF does that even mean?

      • Nounverb911

        Paris Hilton is getting a new Honda from trump?

        • Alan

          I knew you guys wouldn’t let me down.

        • Its all down to whether or not he can get the undercoating thrown in for no additional cost.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        He will throw a dart next week.

        • Master Contrail Program

          I hope the decapitated chicken keels over on something good!

      • Sophia

        He hasn’t consulted with Putin yet

    • Master Contrail Program

      With special guest villain:

      Same batshit time! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dfae3e3826a8b3d04f9749a2f8fa3e848e7872d8bd363131a6cb5e3848f79fe9.jpg Same batshit channel!

    • Bill D. Burger

      So he’s going to compare it to one made in Marysville, Ohio?

    • Phoenixdoglover

      And the Titanic increases speed in a record setting Atlantic crossing.

    • Stulexington

      I feel like I’m watching a Captain Planet villain.

    • VirginiaLady

      The only way to get through to him is to act on his level. He needs to be kicked out of the Paris accord. Told he isn’t good enough to belong to their cool club. That will get his attention, not necessarily in a good way, but for once a stroke might be seen as a positive change.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Trump and stroke in one post. I want to see that more often.

      • Sophia

        I know the U.S. is powerful but I’ve been thinking this myself. They need to carry on as if anything he has to say is insignificant. That would drive him crazy!

        • Elvis Causticfellow

          That Der Spiegel editorial from this week argued for exactly that.

    • Elvis Causticfellow

      Exclamation point added for extra suspense!

  • WideStance

    We know now that Kushner, Flynn, Manafort, and Erik Prince (at least) were feverishly working to set up a “back channel” with Putin that could not be monitored. There is simply no plausible “harmless” explanation for this effort. ALL of the possibilities are so hostile to our system of government that it is now crystal clear why the intelligence agencies have been leaking intercepts from day one.

    • Sedagive ’em Hell

      Ah, but there is a “harmless” explanation if you are a Republican:

      “Obama had the White House bugged.”

      Never, ever, underestimate how gobsmackingly stupid and delusional these people are.

      • WideStance

        Assume for the sake of argument that this the “harmless” explanation. What could be so sensitive about the communications with Putin–as compared to all other communications–that would compel Trump would go to such great lengths to keep them from the supposed Obama bugs?

        • Sedagive ’em Hell

          Trying to get into their heads is a painful exercise that leaves a nasty residue (especially in the morning), but here goes:

          “They were trying to negotiate…”

          “They were attempting to fix…”

          Nope, I can’t do it. My brain can’t go there.

          Perhaps one of our many trolls can help us out.

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            Just spitballin’ here………..could maybe getting rid of Obama sanctions for Russian oligarchs and their American partners have anything to do with it? Have I been lying awake at night too much?…

          • Sedagive ’em Hell

            That doesn’t read as “innocent” to me, but then again, I’m not pretzeling myself in an attempt to justify treason.

            We’re getting close to a breaking point, methinks.

          • vivian

            For those endowed with a love of Reason, that horse left the barn quite some time ago; as for the rest… no amount of evidence will be sufficient.

          • puredog

            I would applaud this sentiment had I not had it myself so many times over the last year or so.

          • Jay Silversmith

            It could be as simple as don the con likes to suck pootie’s dick.

      • RobespierreHoo

        “But the UNMASKING!”

    • Spurning Beer

      Maybe they were planning a surprise going-away party for President Obama? That’s pretty innocuous, eh?

    • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

      Funnel money to Trump for changes in foreign policy is the ONLY logical explanation.

      If you have another post it here.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Let’s face it. They assuredly succeeded. So now we only have to imagine the conversations that have taken place since….

  • Bill D. Burger

    They’re comin’ outta’ the woodwork:
    (Hopefully they can keep him alive long enough to work something out. )

    [Russian Once Tied to Trump Aide Seeks Immunity to Cooperate With Congress
    By BARRY MEIER and JESSE DRUCKERMAY 26, 2017

    Oleg V. Deripaska, a Russian oligarch once close to President Trump’s former campaign manager, has offered to cooperate with congressional committees investigating Russian meddling in the 2016 election, but lawmakers are unwilling to accept his conditions, according to congressional officials.

    Mr. Deripaska’s offer comes amid increased attention to his ties to Paul Manafort, who is one of several Trump associates under F.B.I. scrutiny for possible collusion with Russia during the presidential campaign. The two men did business together in the mid-2000s, when Mr. Manafort, a Republican operative, was also providing campaign advice to Kremlin-backed politicians in Ukraine. ]

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/26/us/politics/oleg-deripaska-paul-manafort.html?_r=0

    • Stulexington

      Well his name’s been released and he’s not dead, Putin just declared Trump is a liability.

      • Jay Silversmith

        Don’t order the polonium sandwich at Maggot Lagoon.

      • vivian

        Or the guy’s intent is to spread false information to muddy the waters.

  • Nounverb911

    Okay, this got published in the UK.

    https://twitter.com/TKartoons/status/868141289539342338

  • chascates
    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      EXcept that I think the US is already too far behind Germany.

    • The Wanderer

      After the White House Clown Squad finishes using the slap sticks on him, Cohn will go back to slavishly pimping US coal.

      • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

        Coal companies got what they want already. No need to do anything else for them.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • The Wanderer

      Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, не сказать больше!

  • Nounverb911
    • The Wanderer

      Full of baloney, and quite bananas.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Stop the clocks. The internet was just won.

        • The Wanderer

          Restart the clocks; something better will come along.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Hands are too big.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Joe: “You believin’ this shit. Oh this shit’s bout’ to get real.”

    President Obama: “We should release one of those “Miss Me Yet?” billboards.”

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DAObz4_V0AAyq2E.jpg

    • RobespierreHoo

      “Call Soros and ask for a few mill…”

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      I miss him so much. Sometimes I tear up over it.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911

    Hey Robbertjan!

    Oops!
    https://twitter.com/F1/status/868446936302485504

    MAX is still P3.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Yup van Doorne messed up Hamilton there.

      • Nounverb911

        MAX P5 with 5 minutes to go in Q3.

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          Yeah no grip on front tires.

          • vivian

            No tread on you?

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            What?

          • vivian

            “don’t tread on me” –> “no tread on you” –> no grip on front tires

          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            I never really understood what is meant with “Don’t tread on me.”

          • therblig

            is that part of foreplay?

            taking notes for a friend.

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          4th best of the rest once again.

          • Nounverb911
          • Robbertjan Brandenburg

            Yup. Allright lads and ladies. Off to the beach to wine and dine a lady in exchange for coitus. Will be back later to check on the incoming impeachment and public executions. All of you behave!

          • Toomush_Inferesistance

            That’s what I like: confidence!….

  • bupkus231

    http://crooksandliars.com/files/imagecache/node_primary/primary_image/17/05/trumptp_roll_mexico.jpg

    Link: http://crooksandliars.com/2017/05/mexican-lawyer-markets-trump-toilet-paper

    Somehow, I doubt it’s usable ( I still have a roll printed with GWB’s image – but it’ll never come near ,my nether parts )

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      You’re dirty after you use it.

  • Bill D. Burger

    “I’ve learned a lot from Mike.”

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DANytzEWsAAjvWe.jpg

    • therblig

      “Always two there are; no more, no less. A master and an apprentice.” ―Yoda

  • chascates
    • Darlene Underdahl

      We see people up where I live trying to catch wild horses. Maybe I need to hide our guns so my husband doesn’t try to shoot one of those guys.

    • bupkus231

      “… to free up space in corrals”??? This doesn’t make sense to me – ifn they’re “wild horses”, what are they doing in corrals ( for cattle, one presumes )?

      • Darlene Underdahl

        The Bureau of Land Management does have corralled wild horses they try to adopt out. I don’t think it’s very successful. The horses are mutts; lovable mutts, but not very good for riding.

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Yummm! Filly Cheese Steak.

  • Ezio
    • The Wanderer

      Trump needs to be reminded that the saying is, “Let George do it,” not Jared.

    • Nounverb911
    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Throwing a jew under the bus. Bannon is proud.

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Bannon would have preferred a well, but…

    • Darlene Underdahl

      Jared’s going to have the breakdown. Donald will just wander off and watch Fox.

  • chascates
    • freakishlypersistent

      Oh goody..

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Trump regards America’s word like his marriage vows.

    • Lyly Sirivong

      Hey Donald, there are loads of money to be made in renewable energy (since that seems to be the only argument that works) !

    • therblig

      wait, the French are selling us Hondas now?

  • Bill D. Burger
  • mimar

    Nice take on this story, Becca. Can’t put one over on the nation’s old dads.
    Love you guys.

  • Bill D. Burger

    Kislyak, ambassador and master spy, thought he had escaped notice when visiting Jared at Trump Tower. But no….
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C77USYPVsAEsuwY.jpg

    Uh huh…

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C_-Cr8PVYAA3CRl.jpg

    • Chadwells

      So HE is the infamous pee hooker!!!!!

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      He was outed by someone unknown, who protested: “She’s not a 10, she’s hardly a 2. Why are you bringing her to see me?”….

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Nounverb911
  • Rick Hill
  • Sophia

    Taxes: The phantom $2 trillion

    Trump’s budget this week was widely mocked (by Stephen Colbert, among many others) for containing a “$2 trillion math error.” In a nutshell, the budget assumes that faster economic growth will help pay for Trump’s huge tax cuts, then it turns around and assumes that same growth will help balance the budget. In other words, he’s counting the same $2 trillion twice.

    The administration’s efforts to explain away the apparent error only ended up causing more confusion. Mick Mulvaney, the White House budget director, told the Senate Budget Committee that there was no double-counting at all: Trump’s tax plan would pay for itself without relying on economic growth, which would require raising some taxes to offset the cuts. That would mark a major shift for the administration, which has previously said the plan would only pay for itself after factoring in the faster economic growth it believes the tax cuts would spark. Speaking to a separate congressional committee, however, Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin implied that there had been no shift.

    Somewhat lost in the back-and-forth, however, is the fact that the double-counted $2 trillion probably doesn’t exist in the first place. The administration argues that cutting taxes will spur faster economic growth, which will mean Americans will earn more money and therefore pay more in taxes. The problem is that pretty much no serious economist thinks Trump’s plan would raise enough money to pay for itself. Even conservative economists at the Tax Foundation last year estimated that the tax plan Trump proposed during the campaign would cost at least $2.6 trillion after factoring in economic growth. (Trump’s most recent plan, a one-page outline released last month, didn’t contain enough details for economists to calculate its cost.) The problem with Trump’s budget math, in other words, goes beyond simple arithmetic; the economics of the plan don’t work, either.

    https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/trumpbeat-a-budget-with-math-errors-and-a-fraction-of-a-wall/#taxes

  • Nounverb911
    • Bill D. Burger

      Ryan: “That’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.”

      • Nounverb911

        Ryan should lead by example, (With votes).

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      On the silver lining side – there will be fewer human beings alive after Ryancare becomes the law, so we’ll save money by letting people die. Balanced budget! Synergy!

      • Skwerl the Impeachanator!

        And don’t forget how much more tax revenue the government will bring in after they die totally fixing the deficit. Because scoring.

    • Hasn’t this been his Big Dream since kindergarten?

      • HooverVilles

        Yep.

      • Nounverb911

        Or at least since he went to college paid for by Social security.

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      What’s funnier still is that both Trumpscare and his budget proposal will actually kill the people who voted for them. They succee