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Fine, go ahead, but you’re going to have to answer to Harvey Fierstein.

Richard Spencer, the face-punched goober who coined the term “alt-right” as a more Twitter-friendly term for “white supremacist lackwits,” led him a big huge torchlight rally of several dozen likeminded idiots to protest the planned removal of a statue of Robert E. Lee in Charlottesville, Virginia, Saturday, for almost ten whole minutes before police told them to git on out of there. After the gathering in the aptly named Lee Park, Spencer

posted pictures and video from the gathering to social media that showed a phalanx of demonstrators holding Confederate battle flags and a banner proclaiming, “We will not be replaced.” Their chants, some of which were captured on video, included “Russia is our friend” and the Nazi-era slogan “blood and soil.”

Spencer and his Nazipals were protesting the Charlottesville City Council’s vote in April to remove the statue and sell it; a circuit court judge has issued an injunction preventing the actual removal of the statue for six months. You know, instead of chanting about how nifty Russia and white skin is, maybe if these morons want to preserve the statue, they could hold a nice big fundraiser online to buy it and display it at the “alt-right’s” headquarters, assuming Richard Spencer’s mom has enough room in her basement.

Charlottesville’s mayor, Mike Signer, wasn’t a fan of the khaki-clad protesters (the Brownpants?), issuing a statement saying,

This event involving torches at night in Lee Park was either profoundly ignorant or was designed to instill fear in our minority populations in a way that hearkens back to the days of the K.K.K.

The Washington Post notes the marchus interruptus was a follow-up to an earlier daylight rally, during which Spencer offered some very defiant slogans:

“What brings us together is that we are white, we are a people, we will not be replaced,” Spencer said at an afternoon protest, the first of two rallies he led in the town where he once attended the University of Virginia […]

“You will not replace us. You will not destroy us,” Spencer said at the earlier rally, which he broadcast via Periscope video. “You cannot destroy us. We have awoken. We are here. We are never going away.”

The video, we should mention, was hilariously titled “It’s going South!” We do not think “going south” means what he thinks it means, but it turned out to be accurate enough, what with the immediate dispersal of the torchlight parade, despite Spencer’s declaration at the beginning of the video that it would be an “all-night” vigil. Oh, yes, this is where we say we love the First Amendment, but we’d add that a mob with torches is pretty clearly a danger to themselves and others, because Fire Bad.

Surprisingly enough, Spencer’s little stunt did not draw any visible support from Corey Stewart, who’s trying to win the Virginia Republican gubernatorial primary with a platform of bitching about the removal of Confederate monuments in Louisiana and elsewhere, since what New Orleans does is clearly the Virginia governor’s bidniss. Possibly he wants to natter on about how Confederacy-humping is about heritage not hate, which is rather difficult to pull off when an actual I Heart Being a Racist dude is carrying a torch and a slavery flag for Robert E. Lee.

All four of the other candidates running for governor — Gov. Terry McAuliffe is term-limited — issued statements denouncing Spencer’s little march. Former RNC chair Ed Gillespie tweeted, “The ugly display of divisive rhetoric and intimidation tactics in Charlottesville yesterday […] does not reflect the thoughtfulness and tolerance I see in my fellow Virginians.” State Sen. Frank Wagner went further in an email statement, saying of Spencer and his Bund of Bothers,

These people are racists. They don’t represent Virginia values. I condemn their actions and beliefs. I call on all Virginians who are involved in efforts to advocate for or against Virginia’s history to act responsibly and honorably.

Democratic Lt. Gov. Ralph Northam said,

There is no place for hate, fear or intimidation in Virginia. The display in Charlottesville is the last gasp of a disgusting ideology. In this commonwealth, our doors are open, our lights are on and we are welcome to everyone who shares a love for it, no matter who you are or where you’re from.

But for our money, the winner is former congressman Tom Periello, also a Democrat, who mocked Spencer on Twitter to his virtual face:

That’s pretty sweet, and proves you don’t need to be carrying a lit torch in your hand to inflict a nasty burn.

Oh, and about those torches: Looks like they’d be a big disappointment to the real Nazis, who at least knew how to put pitch on the end of a stick. These guys got their flammable jollies from the garden supplies department of Lowe’s or True Value:

And for that matter, notes Culture Trip editor Chris Mohney, the Russians were not the Confederacy’s friends, either. The more you know!

[WaPo / NYT]

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  • (((fka_donnie_d)))

    We’re not going away

    We know, Dick. No matter how badly we want you to.

  • Joe Beese

    I want Jeff Probst to smother all those torches and then we can watch them all slink back home.

    • Spurning Beer

      I suspect Jeff is batting for the other team. Or cheering for the other team, at least.

  • Mumen Rider Justice CRASH!
    • Joe Beese

      “I want an order delivered… A bucket of extra crispy and a large Coke… That’s the Colonel’s secret recipe, right? That’s very, very important… That’s going to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue… No, this is not a prank… Look, I’m the President. I can show you a map with all the counties I won…”

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7dfef6fb7bb8518bac26b9f79908c442c3910161ebbd04cf39314d88083f9aae.png

      • kareemachan

        He looks asleep. Probably getting an important briefing from someone…

    • Jamoche

      someone mischievously gave the president a printed copy of an article from GotNews.com, the website of internet provocateur Charles C. Johnson, which accused deputy chief of staff Katie Walsh of being “the source behind a bunch of leaks” in the White House.

      “mischievously”. WTF.

  • “You cannot destroy us…”

    General Sheman begs to differ, you dipshit.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Charlottesville wasn’t even someplace notable in the Civil War. The only thing that happened anywhere near there was a minor skirmish that is only remembered because one of the Union officers was George Armstrong Custer.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        There’s a monument to the Civil War generals from Ohio outside the statehouse in Columbus. Grant, Sherman, Custer, and a fourth one I can never remember because he wasn’t Grant, Sherman, or Custer. Still, Civil War greatest hits.

  • Crank Tango

    Good news is, there weren’t very many mosquitoes. Bad news is, looks like their mommas already had teh Zika.

  • GoutMachine

    “What brings us together is that we are white, we are a people, we will not be replaced,” Spencer said at an afternoon protest, the first of two rallies he led in the town where he once attended the University of Virginia […]

    Wait, I thought the Civil War was about states’ rights and not about race?

    • No, that’s only something that closeted racists say, these guys are out and proud, so they can admit what it was really about.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    C’mon, that’s not a proper mob! When “The Simpsons” can do a better Angry Mob, you suck!

    • Lascauxcaveman

      And you all smell like burnt lemons peels!

  • memzilla Ω

    And with Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, we now have an actual Confederate monument inside the fucking US government.

    • Joe Beese

      Well played.

  • aureolaborealis

    Oh, honey, you’ve already been replaced.

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    They marched around Virginia for a while, then surrendered? Sounds about right.

  • Vincent Ricola

    Stick those citronella tiki torches up your lily white asses, jerkoffs.

    There are more of us than there are of you and demographics will prevail in the end, so you scare exactly no one.

    • Honestly, these people make me wish I wasn’t dating a white girl!

      • Vincent Ricola

        I like white people, I’m related to some wonderful white people, it’s the loud nazis who presume to speak for everyone that I hate.

  • Crank Tango

    What’s Roman doing in that nazi rally? Casey does not approve. http://68.media.tumblr.com/b509baa0526f77d736dfcf0baa9441f6/tumblr_nhtpjcw4qH1rtqggho2_r1_250.gif

  • cheetojeebus

    “We’re not going away”
    I’m fond of that toilet bowl cleaner that will take your breath away if you catch some of the ammonia fumes. Maybe we can try that? That and a good scrubbing should do the trick.

  • arglebargle
  • Mavenmaven

    Note that despite the torches, water cannons were less likely to be used against white supremacists.

    • Jamoche

      I googled it – water isn’t recommended against tikis because it just scatters the flame. Still, it would be fun to watch.

      • Nockular cavity

        However, water cannons would also keep the mosquitos down.

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      We don’t even own water cannons here. Honestly, protests other than the march variety (women’s, science, tax, etc.) are pretty much nonexistent. Which is nice. But boy does it make these jerkwads from out of town seem that much more asshole-y.

  • miss_grundy

    Awoken? Shouldn’t that be awakened?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Can’t you just be happy he didn’t say “waked up”? Besides, “awoken” is a perfectly cromulent word.

      • miss_grundy

        Yeah, but this:

        In Modern English, the tendency has been to restrict the strong past tense and past participle (awoke, awoken) to the original intransitive sense and the weak inflection (awakened) to the transitive, but this never has been complete (see wake (v.); also cf. awaken). adj.
        Awoken | Define Awoken at Dictionary.com
        http://www.dictionary.com/browse/awoken

        • GoutMachine

          Oh, it’s already been broughten!

          • Crank Tango

            I love when grammar is tooken seriously.

    • Crank Tango

      I thought it was “woke” now.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot
      • Joe Beese

        Sometimes I like to pick up my Sylvester, cackle villainously, and pronounce “I shall cook you in my pot, and eat you for my supper. Mmm… boiled cat meat!”

        I haven’t eaten him yet, but I do nibble… just to keep him in line.

        • Mumen Rider Justice CRASH!

          I require that my cat let me give her “nummy face” before letting her out. She hates it but I think realizes that it’s just the price she has to pay. She’d roll her eyes if she could.

  • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

    Knowing Virginia’s climate, it pleases me to think that all the Neo-Nazis got for their little candlelight vigil was a crapload of mosquitoes and gnats in their faces.

  • arglebargle

    He meant to say it would last “alt-night”.

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    Hi, from 4 blocks away from where this happened. We are a quiet, ultra-librul city here in Charlottesville with an aging hippie city council and no love for white supremacists. You bring your bigotry and tiki torches to our doorstep? We will out-do you with peace, love and pretty candles the way the good lord intended. https://twitter.com/JFSmith434/status/863947691633635328

    • Hollandaise

      <3 <3 <3

  • Elvis Causticfellow

    At least they didn’t have to worry about mosquitoes.

    ETA: I knew somebody would have beaten me to this nonpareil jest! I knew it! Why did I just heedlessly post it???

  • memzilla Ω

    …saying of Spencer and his Bund of Bothers…

    WIN! We would have also accepted Average White Bund.

    .https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4w8wEuqhf_8

  • So, do they think people holding luaus are riled up townsfolk or something?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Aloha Hitler!

    • Lascauxcaveman

      OH, a luau? I thought the roast pig was just to ferret out Jew infiltrators.

  • wait! what?

    Blood and soil.

    Okay, just oil.

    But only from dinosaurs Jesus rode.

    • Vecchioivan

      Is that where holy oil comes from?

  • SomeBigRedDog

    What, no pitchforks that upon closer inspection are actually BBQ accessories? It’s like they don’t even try anymore.

    • Joe Beese

      Come for the franks. Stay for the race war.

  • Suttree

    I see that he didn’t have the balls to try this shit in New Orleans.

  • WiscoJoe

    Identity politics, SMH

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Russia is our friend? Are they divvying up Poland?

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Trump has some hotels in the Sudetenland.

  • goonemeritus

    I’m getting sick of the they maybe “profoundly ignorant” excuse for all this obviously racist behavior.

  • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

    “Blood and Soil” was also the catchphrase of East Prussian Junkers, who could tell you how well it worked out for them. Seeing as East Prussia is Polish and Russian now.

  • William
    • AJ Milne

      Assuming rhetorical question, but isn’t it one of Murphy’s laws that every bad idea will be proposed again (and again, and again…)?

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Because… LOSERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • SomeBigRedDog

    Man if I was in Virginia I would have showed up in a Hawaiian shirt with a roast pig and just confused the shit out of everyone.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall
  • Anna Rompage

    Irony, white pride, hoofwaking bunglecucks, talking about not being replaced, while wearing clothes & carrying faux Polynesian tiki torches that were made in china…

  • therblig
    • William

      color coded so they don’t put them on backwards. Yellow front, brown back.

  • AJ Milne

    … from my Lee Park Tiki Lounge TripAdvisor review:

    ‘… atmosphere… memorable but uncomfortable. Waitstaff surly, ranty, poorly-shaven. Drinks arrived late, with muttered excuses about Northern aggression making it difficult to stock mixers. No, I have no idea what that means. Closed early, but, in retrospect, this was probably for the best.’

  • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

    There’s an “economic anxiety” and “wasting money on tiki torches” in the “stop buying iPhones to pay for health insurance” vein somewhere around here – but damned if I can wordsmith it right now.

    Slightly OT: thanks to everyone for the kind words on Friday. I am back in my tree and functional again, but am sure I will be mourning for a while.

  • Proud Liberal
    • GoutMachine

      Yeah, that is some horrific shit.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      It’s important to note that the lady said that his assholery was only *a* factor, not *the* factor, in her leaving her job. That said, this is ridiculously assholeish, even for a New Jersey rep.

    • Skeptical_thinker

      Doxxing is bad, m’kay

    • Spurning Beer

      Oh man, I can’t wait to see what the Congressional Ethics Committee is going to have to say about this.

      Just kidding.

    • therblig

      hopefully, some of the blue municipalities that keep their funds in lakeland bank will move them elsewhere. just like the congressman’s actions – perfectly legal.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    The skeeters in Virginia can be ferocious. That’s just common sense, not hate.

  • schmannity

    The Iragis removed Saddam statues and the Russians Stalin, but some need monuments to remind them that they are losers.

  • William
    • timpundit

      Sherman would have chewed him up and shit him out in between skirmishes and while riding his horse. Also too, probably shit-faced. Him, not his horse.

      • JesusWasAHippie

        Although maybe also the horse was shit-faced.

    • Kinda wondering what he’d do if someone lit his shirt on fire. I mean, he DID ask…

  • Apple Scruff

    Khakis + tiki torches = company BBQ at Goldman Sacks.

  • Treg Brown
  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    Was this not in Florida? Because there are a lot of mosquitoes in Florida…

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Their chants, some of which were captured on video, included “Russia is our friend” and the Nazi-era slogan “blood and soil.”

    Um…they do know that the Russians fought against the Nazis, right?

    • GoutMachine

      No, but they are crystal clear about the Germans bombing Pearl Harbor.

    • Proud Liberal

      History ain’t their strong suit, mista.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Yup, Russia is a corrupt gangster state where any sort of dissent is met with violent, mostly lethal, force. But they ain’t Reds no more, so they’re okay?

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      To be fair, Putin’s embrace of far-right ideologies confuses a lot of people, considering the Nazis slaughtered 20 million Russian civilians. Most people figure that he doesn’t give a shit so long as it weakens his geopolitical opponents.

    • William

      They are friends now, thus the creation of the hybrid “commie Nazi” https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/763392252280cb6057291ce3f86117859a121709001ab0069f6598e2e9187c98.jpg

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      I mean, the Germans were desperate to have the Americans/Brits/Allies overrun them, they knew the Russians would exact revenge (and they did). The Nazis were terrified of the Russians. And it was the Russians who entered and destroyed Berlin at the end. In fact, we couldn’t have defeated the Nazis without the Russians. What a surprise that these fucking idiots are fucking idiots.

  • ltmcdies

    as a fan of Lost which I miss….this lot looks like they are waiting for a fucking Smoke Monster…

  • Tiki Torches at Twilight, indeed.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hTtabHfp2o

  • Bill D. Burger

    Nothing is more ironic that a bunch of Confeds, alt-Rightiewoowoos, and Trumpanzee howler monkeys chanting “USA….USA….USA” while opining their ‘Southern heritage,’ cyring like bitches over Confederate monuments and wearing shirts emblazoned with the Confederate flag:

    https://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/05190b412120d2578066f4a61966b9dd71b59b-wm.jpg?v=3

  • Treg Brown

    Talk about defending our heritage. Where were they when this statue of King George III was being pulled down.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/12a631a0cd3219d270e93d275115abd4d447dd274c1faa2aa00e4dfe4ae4c0f7.jpg

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Making sure no negative mention of slavery was in the Declaration of Independence, duhh.

  • Indivisible Snark Tank

    Since they’re so interested in flying the flags of losers in wars against the US, they should add this to their collection:

    http://images3.alphacoders.com/788/thumb-1920-78857.jpg

  • Vincent Ricola

    Maybe “president” Trump could set up some kind of free visa program to send these chucklefucks to live in Russia since they love it so much.

  • DerrickWildcat

    LOL, “Southern Heritage.”

    • wait! what?

      If they plant Cinsault grapes they could claim Southern Hermitage.

  • Bill D. Burger

    The only thing General Sherman did wrong was that he stopped too soon.

    • Marceline

      Seriously. I re-watched “Gone With the WInd” this weekend since I found it on Amazon Prime and I damn near giggled at the burning of Atlanta. I’m pretty sure I yelled “Get ’em Sherman!” a couple of times.

  • Shibusa
    • Joe Beese

      Hey, racist dickwad blood drinks the same as everyone else’s.

  • Crystalclear12

    Well, aren’t they special.

  • Daniel Hooper

    I hope they return those obviously defective torches. Isn’t citronella supposed to repel annoying and insignificant incests instead of attracting them?

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Greatest typo ever.

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        I’m betting that if you examined the family history of most of those people, you’d find something along that line…

        • Querolous

          I’ll bet if you examined the family trees of most of these morans you would find their roots were planted in the US post bellum.

      • Daniel Hooper

        Whoops, not what I meant… but then again, not necessarily sure it’s an inaccurate statement, either.

  • Vincent Ricola

    OT – I really don’t have faith in Homeland Security advisor Tom Bossert and his ability to successfully deal with cyber attacks on our country. He sounds like an idiot software salesman that drops all the buzzwords and none of the knowledge.

    • msanthropesmr

      Synergy

      • Indivisible Snark Tank

        I am interested in your philosophy and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

      • beingreleased

        Synergize that paradigm outside the box.

      • keenanjay

        Blue-sky thinking to monetize this opportunity!

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      You have to admit, he speaks gobbledygook with conviction.

    • jesterpunk

      Is it wrong that I read that as Tom Bodett at first then wondered when they would turn the lights on for those idiots?

      • Vincent Ricola

        LOL!

  • Rick Hill

    They came for my statues of confederate generals and I did nothing….

    • jesterpunk

      Can we help take them down?

  • Carpe Vagenda
    • MizzMazz

      That’s a keeper. Thanks!

  • LarryHoudini

    I wonder how Richard Spencer will be talked about by his inevitably mixed-race grandchildren.

    • Zonath

      Hopefully in the past tense, and only through second-hand recollections (with votes).

    • therblig

      “no, not that richard spencer”

  • Chadwells

    Typed like 5 posts in response to these a-holes and deleted them all…because rules! Ugh.

  • boyblue122

    The “get over it Trump won” crowd has a hard time getting over that the confederacy lost

  • vivian

    If we really want to fuck with their heads (and YES I DO) then we should replace the statue of Jefferson Davis with one of Saddam Hussein.

    Edit: Or maybe Poncho Villa and Emiliano Zapata… or hell, even one of the Kardasians

    • therblig

      or Angela Davis

      • vivian

        I like the cut of your jib!

    • boyblue122

      How bout a hollywood Trump supporter like James Woods

      • vivian

        His statue should be in Barstow.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          Needles

      • maxneanderthal

        Oh, yes, I noticed woodywoodpecker was spouting his bollocks again- he’d been quiet for far too long (not). We all felt the need for insightful comment from shite, Z-grade, has been/never were “actors”. Should have stayed in the bargain betamax bin at the local convenience store, where you belong, Jimmy.

    • brucej

      Pancho Villa, and lordy lordy lordy did the yahoos howl when one went up here http://www.city-data.com/picfilesv/picv65.php

    • snark-lurker

      statue of Kardasians? lots of masterbatin there after dark

    • Msgr_MΩment

      I vote Lando.

    • Querolous

      Boston Corbett. He shot John Wilkes Booth

  • Jenny

    These guys can’t even make a torch like their grand daddy the klan wizard used to do. Sad.

  • DerrickWildcat

    The Alt-Right are traitorous Russian supporters, so it makes sense they also support Confederate traitors.

    • goonemeritus

      They probably have busts of King George III in their libraries at home

  • DerrickWildcat

    White Power slobs are just losers that want to blame other people for being miserable failures. SAD!

  • jesterpunk

    If the only thing you have to be proud of is that you where born white you really need to reevaluate your life.

  • Jgb979

    Oh noes! Not the Robert E Lee statue! Where will I go to worship an American traitor??…….. except for every single small to medium sized city in the south that existed prior to 1865.

    The liberty monument in NO, where people are facing death threats to remove, is an actual monument to white supremacy (with a hastily added “j/k not anymore” in the 1960’s).

    Richard Spencer is the worst Indiana Jones villain of all time

  • Blackest Noobs

    who knew a college town would have so many white male virgins?

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      None of them live here. Seriously. This was an out-of-town group of busybody neo-Nazis. Although to be fair, I think “busybody” are the only kind of Nazis there really are.

      • tesseraction

        They were too scared/lazy to go to New Orleans.

      • Blackest Noobs

        oh i know….Charlottesville is an odd little town…i lived there once…but didn’t remember all the racist white dildoheads.

  • DerrickWildcat

    Richard Spencer was born in Boston and now lives in Montana. So why is Yankee boy down there? Oh yeah, because it’s about Racism and not Southern Heritage.

    • Nounverb911

      Bostonism?

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        It’s like botulism, only more toxic

        • PubOption

          Wicked toxic, I assume.

    • Jgb979

      For him……I feel like it’s all about attention more than anything.

      It’s filling that same “mommy never loved me” void that drives someone to be famous, only with MUCH less sex and much more racist inbred hillbillies

    • Wild Cat

      Dallas. The Atlantic sucks ass, but they have a profile on this shit up today.

    • OrG

      Really has nothing to do with geography.

    • Jenny

      He is in Montana because mommy and daddy moved there. Basement dwellers gotta dwell.

  • Wild Cat

    Show me an unmarried neo-nazi obsessed about the blonde-rape-by-subhuman mythos they adore and I’ll show you a man who has visited every public mens’ room in a heavily segregated African-American community.

  • goonemeritus

    It was awfully nice of these people to not wear their customary hoods for this photo op. I’m sure there participation will provide a lifelong opportunity to explain themselves.

  • janecita

    I think that we should remove all these confederate statues, and place them in an open museum (park) somewhere. The Hungarians did it with all their Soviet era monuments, and it worked out well.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memento_Park

    • Suttree

      Preferably a superfund site full of toxic waste.

      • janecita

        I was thinking a nice, cozy swamp:-)

        • jesterpunk

          So in Mar-a-Lago?

          • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

            The Master Bedroom

        • Amy!

          Wetlands LIB— well, okay, not libel, but ecological destruction. Don’t poison your wetlands!

        • Suttree

          With alligators. With lasers on their heads.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      That and it makes for a pretty neat James Bond scene setpiece.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Statue segregation!1!!1 What’s next, you liberal fascist?! Garden gnome ghettos?

      • Population one: Jefferson Sessions

      • cmd resistor

        Yesterday I noticed my neighbor’s black jockey garden statue seems to be gone, replaced by a lighthouse. I’m sure not from politics. It’s old so probably enough paint chipped off that she felt the need to replace it…..

        • Lance Thrustwell

          I’d like to have a lawn jockey that’s a little yard-high figurine of a portly white guy in a confederate T-shirt and a MAGA cap.

          • cmd resistor

            Your plants would hate it.

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      That one is scheduled to be moved. Which is what started the whole white supremacist from out-of-town problem, here. The Charlottesville city council voted to move it and rename the park. Apparently doing socially responsible things like that draws an unhealthy element.

    • GoutMachine

      There’s one in Moscow, too, called “Fallen Monuments Park”

    • Good point. We don’t want to erase history; but we don’t want to look like we glorify it either. Like Warner Brothers still allow those old racist cartoons to be circulated, with a disclaimer saying “WE ARE SO EMBARRASSED BY THIS STUFF NOW”.

  • Spurning Beer

    These people don’t have the highest thread-count in the linen closet.

    • I usually go with “sharp as a Nerf ball”

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Not the shiniest frogs in the blender.

    • Anna Rompage

      A few fries short of a happy meal?

      • Cheesus Crust _ Rebel

        A few tacos short of a fiesta platter

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          A few Afikomen short of a Seder

    • Zonath

      Well, they do keep forgetting not to cut the eye holes in the good sheets.

      • JesusWasAHippie

        Which sheets are the “good” sheets?

    • Juan de Fuca

      Two nickles short of a dime?

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      One wave short of a shipwreck.

    • They’d have to study up to be half-wits.

  • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

    I can’t help but notice that almost no one in that pic fits the blond Aryan ideal. And do I spy a redhead to the left there?

    Guess someone forgot to tell them that Hitler’s ideal society was more Vanderbilt frat/sorority mixer, and less Warhammer 40k tabletop convention.

  • Ducksworthy

    Paging General Sherman. Clean up on aisle 3.

  • Zonath

    Still a bigger crowd than Trump’s inauguration.

  • jesterpunk
  • BigCSouthside

    Went to college in VA and after four years still can’t wrap my head around confederacy worship

    • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

      Simple racism. Stupidity. Nothing to feel proud of in their own lives so fetishizing their skin color.

      • maxneanderthal

        Absolutely. Nowhere else on the planet do you get people waving the flag of a totalitarian regime from 150 years ago, and having it flying from civil buildings- and thinking this is normal..WTF? So you aren’t doing it for politics now- you’re doing it to intimidate and terrorise a section of your populace.

        • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

          Thing is, people from out of the U.S. understand revanchism like the South’s; hell, the Serbs kept that fire going for 500 years before they got their independence.

          What confuses them is why the rest of the country allows the public celebration of what can only be called treason, especially in the form of public monuments.

          • maxneanderthal

            Indeed- the Balkans knew exactly what the agenda was with internal ex-Yugoslavian nationalism. The sectarian and nationalistic atrocities that were going on for centuries, long before Srebrenica, aided and abetted by everyone from Princep’s Black Hand revoltionaries, via the SS Prinz Eugen division, were never dressed up as “cultural heritage”…

          • Ducksworthy

            Trump is some sort of Slonenian Revenge?

        • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

          Absolutely with this! In other countries, this shit would be illegal. can’t fly a Swastika in Germany, for example.

          The flawed argument of “but it’s history!” falls short of all reality. W can know the history without memorializing it. There are already plenty of national parks devoted to teaching about the battles and what they meant, we don’t need fairly recent statues of monsters to remind us all of the time when murderous slave owners and racist proto-Nazis attempted to overthrow the goverment of our country, engaged in terrorist attacks an tried to pull off an illegal coup that ultimately resulted in the assassination of the duly elected President of the United States.

          This history is a huge black eye and should not in any way be revered. It’s something to feel shame over.

        • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

          One that was soundly and badly defeated after trying to declare war, also. You don’t see swastikas anywhere in Germany.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Depending on where you grew up, there’s a definite attempt to inculcate the kids in at least subliminally seeing the South, not the U.S., as their nationality. The Lost Cause poor-me-ism provides a convenient excuse for personal and societal failings.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        Yes, exactly.

      • BigCSouthside

        they also tend to be dicks about it. I got shit for being a northerner, but I loved all the same shit they did (minus the confederacy stuff)

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        Nailed it! I see this shit all the time.

      • Amy!

        High school football team in my home town was called the Rebels. Colors black and red. Flags prominent.

        In recent years, they’ve decided to (pardon the expression) whitewash it, by claiming the colors are midnight blue and red, and absolutely banning the flag. Not really fooling anyone.

        I want them to just apologize and come up with a different team name. Which proposal brings out the rabid assholes. Glad I don’t live there any more.

        • Msgr_MΩment
          • Amy!

            I really, really, really hope that their arch-rival is a team called the Goths.

        • goonemeritus

          Hopefully they have a losing campaign just like their idols.

        • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

          I went to UNLV, which is also the “Rebels”. Initially, they did have a mascot that was basically the University of Nevada-Reno’s wolf mascot dressed in Confederate garb.
          There is some justification for the name, in that UNLV was initially a satellite campus of the Reno one, and UNLV “rebelled” to become their own institution. The Confederacy stuff was dropped in the 80’s in favor of a more generic “mountain man” image (though you can still find an image of the original mascot on the floor of the old gym, which is now a museum).
          The last lingering remnant was the Student Newspaper (the “Rebel Yell”), which only changed its name last year to the “Scarlet and Gray Free Press”.

  • Juan de Fuca

    The irony of a bunch nutjobs wanting to save a statue of a guy who opposed erecting Confederate monuments after his side lost the war. Because even Robert E. Lee realized the country needed to heal, put it in the past and move on.

    • Ducksworthy

      Which is why we didn’t hang the lot of them. Now look.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Yo Sothron recidivists… it might be time to rethink the whole Confederacy fetish when your only allies/friends are fucking shit ball Nazis.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Friends of a feather can ride out on a tarry rail…

  • Msgr_MΩment

    “blood and soil.”

    “Alex, what is: What is coming out their noses and what did they do to their pants?”

  • Nazi-era slogan “blood and soil.”

    Don’t mind if you do.
    https://pics.me.me/when-youre-already-drunk-as-hell-but-someone-mentions-shots-18806787.png

  • zerosumgame0005

    ” the immediate dispersal of the torchlight parade, despite Spencer’s
    declaration at the beginning of the video that it would be an
    “all-night” vigil.”

    I think Dick meant an “alt-night” vigil!

  • BrianW

    Citronella torches. Well, it might have looked like the old KKK or Nazi party rally, but it smelled fantastic.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Audible snort of laughter achieved.

    • cmd resistor

      and no bugs!

      • Msgr_MΩment

        Fucking Anti-Entomolitics!

      • zerosumgame0005

        except the ones on 2 legs of course

      • BrianW

        I suspect the smell of rotting teeth and Axe body spray would have kept the bugs away anyhow.

      • BrianW

        Oh, and BTW, how did my cat make it into your avatar? I swear, she gets everywhere….

        • cmd resistor

          Stole it off the Internet somewhere. You should warn your cat every time she posts a selfie it could end up just ANYWHERE. I also stole it for the caption, which is kind of teeny, which says “Why you gotta breathe my air?”

          • BrianW

            I’ve tried to tell her, but does she listen? No, because she’s a cat. The caption does sound like something she would say, though.

    • BadKitty904

      Needs more rum-based drinks with little umbrellas.

      • Crank Tango

        Doesn’t everything?

        • BadKitty904

          Well, yes, that’s true…

      • BrianW

        Only if mixed with the purified tears of neo-Confederates.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    What does Spencer mean with this “we” shit? He’s from fucking Massachusetts, which by every definition I have ever understood makes his as a carpet bagger. Seriously, what is the deal with these people?

    As usual, I am ashamed to be from the South. It’s just a day that ends in ‘Y’ afterall.

    And Dick?
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/a2e6ed563942c70b131605a01439779b69f9045fb8bf0c9177ac96b242ff4665.gif

  • UncleTravelingMatt

    Say what you will about Benedict Arnold, but he never swore an oath to defend and uphold the Constitution of the United States of America.

    • zerosumgame0005

      he was a general, and even though the Constitution was not penned yet, he did take an oath of some kind? to the Continental Congress maybe?

      • UncleTravelingMatt

        The first oath for commissioned officers of the Continental Army, instituted October 21, 1776 — Arnold was commissioned a colonel in late 1775 — was as follows:

        “I _____, do acknowledge the Thirteen United States of America, namely, New Hampshire, Massachusetts Bay, Rhode Island, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, Maryland, Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Georgia, to be free, independent, and sovereign states, and declare, that the people thereof owe no allegiance or obedience to George the third, king of Great Britain; and I renounce, refuse and abjure any allegiance or obedience to him; and I do swear that I will, to the utmost of my power, support, maintain, and defend the said United States against the said king, George the third, and his heirs and successors, and his and their abettors, assistants and adherents; and will serve the said United States in the office of _____, which I now hold, and in any other office which I may hereafter hold by their appointment, or under their authority, with fidelity and honour, and according to the best of my skill and understanding. So help me God.”

        Yup. Military history nerd.

        • zerosumgame0005

          yep I was pretty sure he did in one way or another

        • SFC Sphinxor

          Man, the Founders would have been kicked right OUT of those “Oath Keeper” groups… plus, they’d call George Washington a “cuck” for raising his wife’s kids from a previous marriage.

        • Toomush_Inferesistance

          So, was it retroactive?…

          • UncleTravelingMatt

            Dunno. His pay wasn’t.

  • William
  • Msgr_MΩment

    the Brownpants?

    Just another damn thing that don’t make it.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZLWD75KKGA

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      Frank Zappa was the absolute best! “Strictly Commercial” is on the turn table right now.

      • MizzMazz

        I am a latecomer to appreciating Zappa. Broken Hearts are for Assholes is my go-to for dismissing trolls and the like.

        • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

          I grew up on Zappa. Listened to him on Dr. Demento all the time and my cool brother had a lot of his earlier albums in the 70’s. Lady Jack’s also a huge fan, so we have every single album now.

          “A mountain is something you don’t want to fuck with”, from Billy the Mountain is my go-to for most things, especially dismissing trolls.

          • MizzMazz

            Decided I need more Zappa in my life. My first exposure to him was in our radical independent used record store, but I was too young to appreciate him then. When he went before congress and talked about the PRMC bullshit back in the 80’s, it was a no-brainer that this guy was smarter than the whole room.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            I remember that! 1985 was a really weird time. I still can’t really stomach Tipper Gore for that reason alone.

          • MizzMazz

            She kind of had that Callista Gingrich thing going. Funny about that shit, it made kids WANT to buy the records with the sticker!

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            I still have most of the filthy fifteen for that very reason.

          • MizzMazz

            I had to look that up. So tame by today’s comparisons. Sugar Walls, really?

          • Celtic_Gnome

            I, too, grew up on him. Met him in the 80’s when I was working for the Secretary of State’s office. He did a concert in town, and he always had a table in the lobby doing voter registration because he hated Reagan so much. Cool guy.

  • BadKitty904

    Srsly? Well, I s’pose there’s some comfort in knowing that we on the Left don’t have a total lock on useless gestures.

  • borninatrailer

    ♪♫ Let’s have a ktiki.. ♪♫

  • vivian

    When a lack of melanin is your greatest achievement you haven’t done a goddamned thing.

    • BadKitty904

      Hey, REDHEAD LIBELZ!!1!

      • data_ninja

        Now look what happened. You’ve gone and made the ginger snap.

        Yeah, I’ll show myself out on that one.

        • BadKitty904

          lol

    • Msgr_MΩment

      ♪♫I lack…….rhythm

      /apologies to Gerschwin.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        The beat goes on and I’m so wrong…

  • BadKitty904

    They brought the torches but forgot the cross? C’mon, guys, get with the program…

    • Pre-existing Ugly Dude

      get with the program pogrom

      //Fixed.

    • Shoto

      Buncha incompetent Nazis, amirite?

      • BadKitty904

        I hate incompetent Nazis.

        • Toomush_Inferesistance

          APANITF!…

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      Bet they didn’t bring the cannoli, either.

  • Pre-existing Ugly Dude

    You just know all the regular stores, like Bed Bath & Beyond, were cleaned out of tiki torches. Some of them had to buy theirs at Big Lots, where they only had closeout torches with weird scents like peppermint and lemongrass.

    • GoutMachine

      Does Hobby Lobby sell tiki torches?

      • wavicles

        Just torches.

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        Oh, crafty….

    • Msgr_MΩment

      The real question is whether the torches could cover over the smell of skidmarked pants and desperation.

      • snark-lurker

        and jizm in their tighty-whities

    • CogitoErgoBibo
      • GoutMachine
        • Turgid Love Skwerl

          Have you not been in a gun shop in the last 20 years?

          • GoutMachine

            I’m a D.C.-livin’ librul, so … no. (Actually, I’ve never been in a gun shop.)

          • Celtic_Gnome

            I was settling up at the local gun range, and they had Fox News on playing a clip of Colbert from his show talking about a bill in some southern state to allow 4 year olds to get a hunting license. Colbert said, “Nation, I’m for this bill. You can’t fail a background check if you don’t have a background.”

            I was the only one in the place to laugh.

      • BadKitty904

        Reminds me of DIDI’S USED WEAPONS (“If We Can’t Kill It, It’s Immortal”)…

  • Ezio
    • The Wanderer

      He’s right, you know.

  • Shoto

    Does the fact that Dipshit Spencer held another rally prove that he hasn’t been punched in the face enough times? Hey, I’m just asking the question.

    • He could schedule 23.5 hours a day for face punching and it still wouldn’t be enough.

      • MizzMazz

        Cuz there would be a line.

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

    Seriously, sportsfans, i am pissed off about all of this today. Spencer’s little ten white men march, the asshole from Alabama still saying only bad people get sick, all of this shit.

    I am so glad I don’t have any power or I’d sign some stupid executive order that lets me stick my shoe all up in their asses for sport. I am out of dicks for these people to eat. Too pissed off for words with these guys.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      32 million the diabeetus folks get their blood sugar askew over asshole from Alabama……..he may have to take insulation….

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        What’s funny is that these idiots do think that way. Insulin dependent diabetics are type 1. I swear, my neighbors here are dumb as posts about everything.

  • Crank Tango

    Oh I thought it was Blood, Ants, Oil.

    Just like my garage.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Worst first date ever.

  • Ezio

    Soooo….literal Neo-Nazis are proclaiming that Russia is their friend? Didn’t Nazis used to call Russians or Eastern Europeans “Slavic” and inferior or something? It’s kind of ironic how they now see Russia as some final bastion of “white western civilization”. I mean call a Russian “western” and watch how they react.

    “Master race” my ass.

    • BadKitty904

      Hitler said exactly the same thing…until he decided to attack Russia. How’d all that turn out for him, anyways?

      • maxneanderthal

        CHavGoB. (Could have gone better…)

      • Msgr_MΩment

        It went well #withafewexceptions.

      • Ezio

        Ultimate irony: The Nazis were quite literally defeated by snowflakes.

        • DainBramage

          General December and General January remain undefeated.

        • BadKitty904

          They never learn, do they?

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            If they could learn, Spencer would have shut his mouth after the first time he got his ass kicked for it. Thinking people learn that if you say a thing and people beat the hell out of you for saying that thing, you just stop saying that thing.

          • BadKitty904

            Nobody said being a self-proclaimed martyr was easy…

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            I’ll be in the veranda since Dick Spencer is on the cross.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Dick Spencer before he dicks you.

          • wavicles

            Who knew it was so complicated?

          • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

            It is literally all they have. Otherwise they’d have to do something like get an education or work hard or learn something about the world. It’s haaaaaaaard.

          • Latverian Diplomat

            “Even when you make it obvious.”
            — Napoleon Bonaparte

        • Christopher Story

          That explains a lot, actually.

        • Paul

          Napoleon too. General Winter has always been Russia’s greatest general.

    • Master Contrail Program

      This has nothing to do with the topic. Just something I stumbled across that I figured you may enjoy. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2458575742d019d785a208061098f3c06796d9ce209a513069ec92f6b5142ba5.png

      • Stulexington

        He’s not just invulnerable he’s nigh invulnerable!

    • merty

      They don’t seem too picky about the people who join up in the US, most of them seem inbred. Not exactly the gene pool anyone would want to draw from to form this so called “master race.”

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Meanwhile, Press Room Under Siege continues.
    https://twitter.com/CNN/status/864192046688608257

    • Msgr_MΩment

      “Mr. Spicer, how’s the search for replacing you coming along?”

      • goonemeritus

        I hear it’s all tied up between random racist uncle and not having any Press Secretary at all.

    • Vincent Ricola

      And we’re not going on your Sunday shows until you stop asking these types of questions either!

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      Of course he has “nothing further on that”. He never does. Nothing further on the evidence that Obama snuck into T Tower and did a tapp on his wires, no evidence that 3 million people voted illegally for Sec. Clinton, no evidence for a damned thing the inpatient-in-chief has ever or will ever say.

      45 is everybody’s bitter old uncle, drunk out of his mind and screaming about how the Chinese are trying to steal his dog.

      • RobKanC

        Why would he need to go further when his idiot base does not need anything other than his majesty’s words.

        • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

          I dunno, I should know better than to try the liberal voodoo of thinking where these idiots are concerned.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      Stonewall Bunny…….

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      They need to start every press conference by asking why Trump doesn’t have as many twitter followers as President Obama.

    • The Wanderer

      Something something something United States v. Nixon something something.

      • Cat Cafe for the Investigation

        also, too, something something something Nuremberg something.

        • The Wanderer

          “I vas only followink orders! I vas in Austria durink ze Var!”

  • goonemeritus

    As a New Yorker I feel compelled to gloat about getting to keep our magnificent General Sherman statue.

    • BadKitty904

      Well, Sherman was prone to “melancholy insanity,” so y’all can determine how apt his memorial might be…

      • goonemeritus

        He was tortured in life but he looks swell, all gold shiny in death.

    • maxneanderthal

      “Hurrah! Hurrah! the flag that makes you free!
      So we sang the chorus from Atlanta to the sea”

      ..goes down a storm down South, I hear…

    • The Wanderer

      A magnificent presence at the entrance to Central Park. I think, though, that General Sheridan’s statue looks a bit disapproving, seeing as it’s near the Stonewall Inn.

    • Mike Wallace

      There is a man who knew how to use a torch. Now if his ghost can just come back and finish I85…

  • Mike Wallace

    They get really angry when you try to take away their participation trophies.

  • jesterpunk
  • Ryan Denniston

    Were any Spencers punched during this event?

    • Anna Rompage

      We can only hope!

  • Juan de Fuca

    If they would’ve worn plastic grass skirts and coconut bras, they could’ve pulled off the greates luau Charlottesville’s ever seen.

    • Thorn Spike

      It’s going South Pacific!

      “You’ve Got to Be Carefully Taught”

      • Toomush_Inferesistance

        “This Nearly Was Mine”…..(french version)…

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          “The Future Belongs to Me”
          Can’t go wrong with the classics.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            Man, these people have absolutely no clue what anything means before they try to misappropriate it. Like they don’t know that Cabaret is a huge indictment against Nazism and a display of the horrors that twisted ideology creates.

  • r m reddicks

    Mayor Signor, I suggest it’s not an either/or but both.

  • TJ Barke

    Nazi garbage.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      And that’s why the streets are littered. #startseeinggarbage!

  • Bitter Scribe

    Has this guy ever done anything besides invent the term “alt-right”? He’s gotten more mileage out of one stupid idea than anyone I’ve ever seen.

    • BadKitty904

      An up-and-coming GOP grifter!

      • jesterpunk

        Does he need to move out of his mother’s basement first?

        • BadKitty904

          Baby-steps, dude, baby-steps…

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Don’t forget Grover Norquist. He came up with his no tax pledge in middle school and has been milking that ever since.

  • goonemeritus

    I’m betting most of those suits were bought for arraignment appearances.

    • BadKitty904

      Bobby Lee’s Fashion Barn obviously had a sale…

    • UncleTravelingMatt

      Their moms think they look handsome.

    • BadKitty904

      Tailorings by BassPro…

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      I’m guessing they’re leased…

  • TJ Barke

    Union forever!

  • memzilla Ω

    O/T: White House STILL not denying that they have a recording system.
    https://twitter.com/BraddJaffy/status/864189499915612160

  • Jim

    Tiki Torch Totenkopfs

  • Anna Rompage

    What is it about these marginal, lackluster, douche bags having the need to denigrate others all to make themselves feel better about themselves?

    For fucks sake, take up a hobby, find something that you love doing, and do it! You’d be surprised how much happier life can be when you’re doing something that you actually enjoy doing, and that feeds positive energy into you and the world around you…

    • h4rr4r

      That is what is about these folks.

      You explained it already. They are losers and don’t want to feel like losers, so they need someone below them. Dickhead spencer uses these losers to make himself feel better as the king of the losers.

    • jesterpunk

      That is the only thing they have in their lives. Spencer is almost 40 and still lives with his mother.

      • h4rr4r

        My parents live not that far from one of these nazi losers. He lives in a run down camper, not trailer, a fucking broken down camper on his Mom’s property. She won’t let him live in the house. He had a mail order bride who divorced him as soon as she could and still keep her residency.

    • TJ Barke

      It’s not enough that they aren’t actually being oppressed, they want to be able to actively oppress others.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      I think you answered your own question. When you’re a marginal, lackluster, douche bag there just isn’t anything positive about yourself to feel good about, so you invariably do the next best thing and try to shit all over someone else…

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Most hobbies require a talent of some sort.
      Hobbies for Nazis? Collecting guns, and Nazi collectibles, to show off to your Nazi friends.

      • merty

        If Hitler was a good painter, imagine how differently things would have turned out…

    • Stulexington

      Because hobbies require patience and slowly getting better at something, which means they start out sucking and have to learn something. Denigrating someone for that instant rush however fleeting is much quicker and easier.

      Basically I’m saying they’re lazy and can’t handle personal failure even if it’s part of a process towards self improvement.

  • Toomush_Inferesistance

    They are so cute!….

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    LOL Welcome to Charlottesville. I’m only surprised the followup question didn’t ask if the torches were properly recycled. Seriously, we’re new at Nazi-fighting, here. It just hasn’t come up. And we’ll always revert to the familiar, like bitching about some arcane part of the city code.
    https://twitter.com/cvillenews_desk/status/864200439922917378

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      How about the ones made by the Acme Company?…

      • CogitoErgoBibo

        The roadrunner can keep those. :-)

    • Turgid Love Skwerl

      Yeah, but hate speech won’t free speech and I am pretty sure that they was provoking.

  • leemoder

    I love the torchie doofuses wearing business suits; like in a bad 80s-Italian Mad Max ripoff.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    If a Neo-Nazi gets punched in the dark, does he still whine?

    • jesterpunk

      Can someone find out for sure? Its been too long since Spencer got punched.

    • Anna Rompage

      People need to start using brass knuckles when they punch that fucker!

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        He’s like a weeble. Wow, that just dated me.

        • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

          I got that reference and remember the old jingle, so I dated myself just now.

    • zerosumgame0005

      always!

    • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

      Of course he does. Nazis all whine, stop whining, stop being a Nazi.

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        In a perfect world the whining would follow the sound of teeth being spit onto the floor.

        • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

          It used to be a perfect world. I used to beat the shit out of actual Nazis when I was a young man. Never got arrested for it either. Cops would come while we beat them, wait around and arrest the Nazis after the fact.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            ME TOO! Back in my punk days we used to go fuck up the Nazi skin heads on the occasional Saturday night.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            My punk days as well! We were emboldened by the idea that the Nazis were trying to steal our music.

            Nothing ever changes, does it?

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            HAH! We just like to drink and fight. The Nazis were annoying, arrogant, loud and played shitty music…well, shittier than most punk music…

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            I liked to get ripped and fight as well, but I was pretty idealistic back then and felt like everything had to have a deeper purpose.

            Of course, it didn’t hurt that beating Nazis felt so damned good. They didn’t help themselves either by being so obvious about it, with their red shoelaces and knockoff combat boots.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            It was a weird time for me. I was a redneck in college and learning for the first time that people who were different than me weren’t evil. A lot of anger needed to be burned off and Nazis are the worst, so… My friends were an idealistic lot though. They were fighting the good fight. I was just good at fighting.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            I was in Highschool when I found out a kid who lived in my apartment complex was a Nazi. He had the flag and everything, creepy as hell. A few years later, he killed a homeless guy because said guy was black. I gave a statement against him in court. Look up Mark Lane, that’s the guy.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            Wow. Sick fuck. Hope you got the boot in his side a few times before he went to jail.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            Yeah, waffled his ass back in high school. I was more than happy to rat him out too. That will always rank, to me, as my single greatest accomplishment in life. I am dead serious. I helped send an actual Nazi to prison, I need to nothing else in my life, really.

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            Got me beat. Imprisoning a Nazi. Nice. Looking like we may get a chance to try and hurt some more of them what with all the ruckus they’re raising now a days. Getting old though, have to be a lot sneakier about it so I don’t get hurt. We’d better stop this line before we get banned.

          • Doug Langley

            The same Mark Lane who saw conspiracies in the Kennedy assassination?

          • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

            I think it was the Lane in GA.

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            Nah, two bit thug who murdered a defenseless man. He was a member of one of the country’s largest neo Nazi groups.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Don’t be stupid, don’t be whiney,
        Come and kiss some Nazi heinie.

    • Toomush_Inferesistance

      APANITF!….

  • jesterpunk
  • whitroth

    What state is it that’s trying to make it legal to run down protesters?

    • TJ Barke

      N. Dakota.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “They’re coming right for us!”
        — North Dakota Attorney General Jimbo Kern

  • leemoder
  • jesterpunk

    I am really tempted to buy this shirt to wear whenever these Nazi’s are around.

    https://supernatural-stuff.com/products/i-killed-hitler-shirt

    • Turgid Love Skwerl

      Do you know who else killed Hitler?

      • jesterpunk

        Hilter also killed Hitler.

      • Christopher Story

        Who invented meth?

      • whitroth

        “Just a few blocks from here, a couple of weeks ago, the dirty rat shot himself” – Norman Corwin, “On A Note of Triumph”

  • Longstreet63

    This totally came out differently in his head when he planned it.

    • jesterpunk

      His mother wouldnt give him next weeks allowance to buy real torches or anything.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Whatever happened to “Suck it up! You lost! Get over it!”?

    • MizzMazz

      Or “Get Lost! You suck!”

  • Christopher Story

    This from the same people who are always yelling:
    “You lost the election, get over it!”

    Oh you butthurt snowflakes.

    • JesusWasAHippie

      But this is … different? Because –

      Because shut up, okay??

  • Pre-Existing Condition Jack
    • Latverian Diplomat

      Just be careful not to buy the Trump “Wall Bonds” by mistake.

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        There was a time when Americans say the concept of border walls as evil. Just saying. . .

        • Mr. Trumplethinskin, tear down that wall! Or…fence. Or levee….

          • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

            Ballard wall. Ask Spicey.

    • Vel Venturi

      Too bad that thanks to Nick Spencer (no relation as far as I know) Cap is a Nazi and is no longer punching them.

      • Pre-Existing Condition Jack

        I’ll wait and see how that Hydra story pans out. Either way, Cap will always be what he was before to me. That’s not going to change simply because some writer wants to take the character into a different direction.

        I felt the same way about “Thew Dark Knight Returns” and how that sparked a movement wherein Batman started shooting people. Batman hates guns and never uses them. Changing that destroys the nature of the character.

      • BreakingDeadMen

        Yeah, unbelievably disrespectful.

  • RobKanC

    But civil rights was 800 years ago. Why can’t black people get over it.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Jeebus gave us all Civil Rights when he gave the Ten Amendments to Moses. And Robert E. Lee was a Christian, so who is the real victim here?”
      — A Southern Apologician

  • Latverian Diplomat

    In solidarity with the good people of Charlottesville, Oslo, Norway put up a statue of Quisling just so they could immediately take it down again.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    I take it this means Home Depot doesn’t sell crosses…

    • TJ Barke

      Lazy millenials not wanting to make their own burnin’ crosses…

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        No do-it-yourself spirit these days

        • Pisto75666

          In MY day we had to make our own. Cut our own branches and everything. Kids these days!

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    How about a KickStarter to raise money to buy the statue? We could then chop it up and sell it for the scrap that it is.

    • TJ Barke

      *cried over by genuine nazis!*

    • I have the image of selling Lee’s right index finger on ebay.

      • Me not sure

        Have it removed and solidly welded up his ass.

    • Jay Free

      I think it might be better to buy it and then change the head out for Malcolm X’s and mount it on his front porch

  • (((Jesus Christ)))

    Hey DickSpence, you lost. Get over it.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Robert E. Lee himself told them to drop it but do they?

      • Me not sure

        CONFEDICUCK!

  • Certified Green Bastard

    Alt-right, get off tha fuckin island.

    https://media.giphy.com/media/zQygOowSwHnnG/giphy.gif

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    I hate Virginia Nazis…

  • Mehmeisterjr

    “You cannot destroy us. We have awoken. We are here. We are never going away.”

    Correction: Per The Racist Dipshit Manual of Style, correct racist dipshit grammer should be “We done awokened” or “We gone and been awookened.”

    NB: Trump would spell it “awookkened.”

    • Me not sure

      “Hell,…We ain’t nary not never been asleepted!”

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    OT, but if any Wonkers are still slogging along with WinXP, there’s a patch (yes, for XP) that MSFT doesn’t seem to want you to actually know about:
    http://www.catalog.update.microsoft.com/Search.aspx?q=KB4012598

    Too bad they didn’t bother doing this, like, last month.

  • eyelashviper

    Citronella Tiki Torches are sure to terrify onlookers, along with those sporks they are waving in the air….
    Basement dwellers never quite get the right clues.

  • To be fair, citronella works better than pitch to keep away the mosquitoes, which might be out already. Probably because of global warming.

  • Lowes? You can buy them at the food lion!

  • Me not sure

    The whole “Tiki Culture / Fruity Drinks” crowd should put on their best Hawaiian shirts and hula skirts and march to demand that a Tiki God statue be put up in Lee’s place. Then,… umbrella drinks for everybody. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ef7557c3317a35039d8140be834e66962b5ea7f324899a48fe1301434c97af07.jpg

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      A Tiki Torch Party with 10 or 20 times the number of participants would send a message. And, per the above pic, would be fun.

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Actually that’s brilliant. Ridicule is like salt for those slimy slugs

  • Swampay

    Lemme get this straight, these people are saying “commemorating our historical butthurt doesn’t mean we’re racist fuckwads” by acting like racist fuckwads? Am I missing something?

    • Ferroequinologist Ron

      No, but they are.

  • sgt. jmk of the résistance

    So… apparently, Alt-White Dipshit Spencer has been implicated in the strobe attack on Kurt Eichenwald.

    I’m seeing some legal face-punching in Little Dick’s future.

    • Edith Prickly
      • Pisto75666

        That never, ever gets old.

        • BreakingDeadMen

          It really doesn’t. And hearing his weasel voice talking about a purloined cartoon frog makes it even better.

          • Pisto75666

            I’ll take your word for it. The whole Pepe thing annoys me enough without putting a voice to it. Which is probably weird considering my userpic but as everybody knows: Michigan J. Frog > Pepe

          • BreakingDeadMen

            He gets punched right when he says it. I think the real Pepe is like ‘Fuck Yeah, get that Nazi.’

        • Parakeetist

          I still think it would make a great video game.

          • Pisto75666

            It would! Though I don’t know if a video game could be made around punching someone in the face. Unless that would be the objective and have some level goals leading up to it. Make it fun! : try to make it past a group of alt-white protesters. Get a confederate statue removed (for 1,000 points), that kind of thing.

      • sgt. jmk of the résistance

        Never, ever gets old.

    • Pisto75666

      Good. I still rage-remember some of the tweets at Eichenwald when he talked about legally going after the asshole(s) who did it. Because causing immobilizing seizures in someone is apparently HILARIOUS to some.

      Maybe I need a different sense of humor.

  • BearDeLaOursistance

    Putting the “dick” in Dixie.

  • Skaarphy

    An interesting Richard Spencer portrait in The Atlantic:
    https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/06/his-kampf/524505/

  • MisterShoebox

    I’m going to go full on geek here and mention a couple of things;

    DC comics has an obscure character called The Haunted Tank, which is a tank possessed by the ghost of a Confederate General that had a Stars and Bars on the back. But that was removed whenever the character shows up again.

    Jonah Hex, quite possibly the most awesome Western character that DC comics has to offer, still wears his old confederate uniform. It’s one of his staples, along with his facial scar and Dragoon .44 revolvers. He doesn’t wear the Stars and Bars. He also shot Stonewall Jackson, Fun Fact. One of his baddies is someone who calls himself “The Grey Ghost”, (NOT the awesome DCAU character, I must point out), a deranged Confederate loyalist who runs around with a Confederate flag on his head like a mask. So even in a comic where the main character WEARS A CONFEDERATE UNIFORM, THE STARS AND BARS MEANS YOU’RE A RAGING DOUCHEBAG.

  • CATMAN

    No cross burning? gee, what a disappointment

    • Blackest Noobs

      i know…i half expected some strange fruit hanging from the trees…whaddy mean we ain’t lynchin’ no negroes?

  • Jesse

    Richard Spencer and the Citronella Snowflakes… I smell a band name!

    • BreakingDeadMen

      Epic.

  • in the name of the moon

    I’m surprised all the crap he puts in his hair didn’t combust around open flame.

    • Jay Free

      He’s a Dapper Dan man

  • clubseal

    Not that I’m looking for intellectual consistency from Neo-Nazis, but wouldn’t any Nazi with a sense of history not call Russia their friend? I mean, World War II did happen, right?

    • Nick Scroggs

      “If it’s white, they’re alright” it seems. Unless they’re Jewish. Or have a black grandmother. Or have a developmental disability. Or I can go on.

    • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

      Maybe young Richard has been reading up on the Hitler Stalin Pact, assuming the boy can actually read.

      • John Thorstensen

        Molotov-Ribbentrop pact. That sure worked out well!

  • Jay Free

    Does anyone wanna fund a trip for me to go to Virginia and punch him in his other ear? While I do not normally condone violence, I make a few exceptions, especially for racist scumbags like him.

    If you live in Virginia then pour a soda or something on this fool

    • Jeff Ackerman

      Can airline frequent flyer miles be donated for the trip?

      • Jay Free

        Not if you want your contribution to remain anonymous ;-)

        • Jeff Ackerman

          I could care less about being anonymous, I even post with my real name.

          • Jay Free

            Lol…I was just sayin…to avoid self incrimination. Going to jail for a shmuck like this is not worth it…

    • VirginiaLady

      I don’t drink soda. I could accidentally theoretically drop my purse full of lead bricks on his foot, metaphorically speaking with votes.

      • Jay Free

        I’ll give you cold hard cash to dump something on his head…no joke. Call it a Gatorade dump for winning the Stupid Bowl

    • I don’t want to get my hand dirty.

  • TootsStansbury
  • Jay Free

    Why aren’t there any trolls here? This has to be the only left wing site not being inundated with alt white trolls

  • Jay Free

    Does anyone else here wanna get a PA system and blast “We Are the World” at his front door and have Ru Paul do a drag race in the street while Al Sharpton preaches and have the movie “Lean On Me” playing on a giant screen on repeat?

    Just a thought

    • Parakeetist

      I’m in.

  • Scooby

    Lost twice 1865 then again 1945.

  • VirginiaLady

    Nazi era slogan “Blood and soil.” Sounds more like a vampire slogan, but the two can be the same here in the Old Dominion.

  • SeeTrain65

    To show you the feelings from the folks where I live, Tiki Torches were on sale today at Walmart.

    Get me the fuck out of here.

  • King Beauregard

    Water balloons, except filled with gasoline.

  • Craic
    • UnsaltedSinner

      Damn, I’m stealing that.

  • Panika MCD

    a) those citronella things can be dangerous if they spill. what happened to a little candle light?

    b) they said they weren’t going away and then they were forced to go away. this is a fun game.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Richard Spencer can suck my Yankee dick. I’ll fill his mouth with whiteness.

  • dshwa

    If it’s about”Heritage not hate”, why do the people filled with hate support it?

    • Lily412

      Exactly. They are full of shit. I knew some civil war reenactors in high school, and even they would think this is fucked up.

  • Jeff Mc Donald

    Was it really just 152 years ago? Damn, time flies and before you know it, you can’t remember you lost that war.

  • Jo Mathie

    Tom Perrielo’s response to that dipshit was beautiful and brightened up my morning. God racists are dumber than a bag of hair.

  • Politiquacks

    Hey, at least they didn’t have to worry about mosquitos!

  • GRH
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