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Not one bit.

Did you know that Donald Trump used to be a guy who was totally not interested in dropping bombs on Syria, but then changed his mind when his hot daughter Ivanka was all “Daaaaad! OK first of all I would like another pony, and also those pictures of gassed Syrian beautiful little babies gave me some feels in my heart, so please do the bombs to an empty airstrip in Syria and let Russia know first so nobody gets hurt”? That is … OK, it is Wonkette’s joke version of what might have happened, but according to a Daily Telegraph interview with Little Brother Eric Trump, AKA the dumb(est) one, that is kind of what happened. Ivanka was reportedly “heartbroken and outraged,” and that helped her daddy make the decision to make cruise missiles go boom:

“Ivanka is a mother of three kids and she has influence. I’m sure she said: ‘Listen, this is horrible stuff,’” Eric Trump told the Telegraph.

“My father will act in times like that. And by the way, he was anti doing anything with Syria two years ago. Then a leader gasses their own people, women and children.”

Donald Trump did not understand the conflict in Syria two years ago and he still doesn’t. For the record, the Syrian leader Assad gassed his own people, including women and children and itty bitty babies, back in 2013. And while there is a part of us that would like to believe Trump and Vank-Vank saw these terrible pictures and it made them sad, we don’t really believe it because A) they lie a lot and B) oh good grief. And also too, can you imagine if we were learning that President Hillary Clinton did bombs to an airstrip — that somehow magically failed to hit any of the runways, and that, again, Russia and Syria were well aware of beforehand — because Chelsea had the feels? Oh Jesus, we do not even want to imagine what CNN and Fox News would be like right now.

Anyway, Eric Trump has his own thoughts about the Syria airstrike, and you will be surprised to learn they are dumb thoughts:

He said: “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

Did the airstrike really “prove” that, though? Because it all seemed really effing stage-managed to us. Trump vaguely bombs the Syrian government’s side in the civil war — when U.S. policy beforehand has been much more about fighting ISIS over there — and that distracts the American media from the multiple investigations into Russian interference in the 2016 election and Team Trump’s possible collusion with the Russians in order to win said election. Meanwhile, it gives Trump and Putin a good little manufactured reason to GRRR at each other, because that’s good optics. Meanwhile, whatever shit we broke on that Syrian airstrip will just be replaced by the Russians, in exchange for some rubles, and the missiles we sent will be replaced by us, in exchange for $100 million or so in taxes to Raytheon. (We are just going to assume it is Raytheon, please don’t make us look it up.)

Are we missing something here? Maybe we are, because Slate says Eric Trump is totally right and this little bitty weenus of an airstrike proved that all these Democrats (and Republicans and intelligence experts) who think Trump is in cahoots with the Russians are C-R-A-Z-Y.

Nope, we are still not seeing how Eric Trump is right.

As for the other grown-up Trump children, Donald Jr. has been retweeting his sister and daddy’s tweets about the airstrike approvingly, and he also retweeted a Dinesh D’Souza thing about how there’s a new sheriff in town in Syria, and it is Donald J. Trump:

Golly gee, so many thrills running up so many legs right now.

On a related note, here’s a poll that says how many Democrats and Republicans supported Trump’s Syria strikes, vs. how many Democrats and Republicans supported Obama doing the same. Guess which party is more intellectually honest?

Huh, it’s like the Democratic Party is populated by people who think through issues and form their own opinions and then are pretty consistent about them whether it’s a Republican or a Democrat doing actions they agree or disagree with, whereas Republicans are fascists who respect the authori-tah of whatever their GOP leaders say, because if Daddy says we should do something, Daddy’s right, because Daddy’s always right, and no, Obama doesn’t get to be Daddy, what are you, race-mixin’? The GOP says NO THANKS!

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    • Oblios_Cap

      Unfortunately, short of committing voter fraud, I can’t vote for the guy.

      • puredog

        It is said that the sweet Soros bucks go a long way toward soothing the pain of the illegality.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        Aw go on, cast a fraudulent vote. You’ll be making the R’s dearest fantasies come true! Give a little, Olio.

  • Tennessee Rain

    This cannot be stressed enough: I’m really start to hate those fuckers in the White House.

    • HazooToo

      Starting?

    • h4rr4r

      Well, my days of not liking trump are certainly coming to a middle.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I started hating Donald Trump almost 35 years ago. Nothing that has happened since has given me the slightest feeling that I should reevaluate my position.

      • Oblios_Cap

        I didn’t hate him back then; rather, I found him to be a clown-like little man.

        • h4rr4r

          So you would say nothing has changed?

          • Oblios_Cap

            No. I hate him now.

          • cmd resistor

            Because back then he wasn’t in the position to do such harm and was just one of many assholes we were free to ignore.

      • goonemeritus

        I credit the late great Spy magazine for refining my opinion of The Donald.

  • memzilla Ω
  • memzilla Ω
    • MizzMazz

      Yeah, was just going to say, what about Flint? Not a word. this needs to be shouted at him until his eardrums break.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Well, if Dinesh D’Susie says there’s a new sheriff in town, well, then, there just is.

    Too bad it’s an ex-member of the Keystone Kops.

    • The Wanderer

      Fatty Arbuckle?
      Also, fuck Dinesh D’Felon.

      • cmd resistor

        That guy sucks so bad. I still can’t believe anyone listens to a word he says/tweets.

  • Mavenmaven

    Other than Mr T, this is how they imagine themselves. And we know which one is Eric:
    http://images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/37200000/The-A-Team-the-a-team-37255442-431-300.jpg

  • puredog

    If the thrills are running DOWN my legs, am I doing it rong?

  • Michael R
    • MamaBrown

      Jared is totally grabbing her ass in that picture.

    • mailman27

      That’s the way you put your arm around your wife if you’re a:
      A Gentleman
      B Greasy-haired sociopath

  • Asterix

    I find it difficult to believe that Ivanka gives a rats ass about anything other than herself. Take a good looke at her – at her eyes – that is one cold, hard bitch.

    • h4rr4r

      Eh, I bet she just has no idea about the world.

      Most people don’t, and the rich even less so.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    I’m so glad that our foreign policy is being dictated on what makes Ivanka Trump sad. I would hate to think we’re acting on things like sound judgment and reasonable research.

    • Oblios_Cap

      That wouldn’t be the ‘murican way.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    “Daaaad… Jarod and I had to wait 30 minutes to get seated at Le Cirque. And then the food wasn’t even very good.”

    [/Trump calls the Pentagon]

  • Debra Dassow

    Life is just a bowl of Skittles.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    Also send monies to SNATCH (Spay and Neuter All Trump Children Hastily).

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    Do we have to wait until 2020 to get Al, Bud and Kelly Bundy to weigh in and lend a learned opinion on foreign affairs?

    • Suttree

      Don’t forget Seven!

  • Vincent Ricola

    “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

    As the kids say…
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/c449520a2225e8ea099ea091a1ddb378e4ab38b429578153c6853dbbe84a211e.gif

  • Bill D. Burger

    Today:

    Spicer: “Even Hitler didn’t sink to using chemical weapons in World War II.:

    Goddammit! What is wrong with these people? Hitler gassed millions he saw as enemies.
    Jeeeeez’ I hate these fools. Words fail.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zN_DkLC4g1g

    • h4rr4r

      Hitler did not use chemical weapons on the battlefield……

      /Well not a lot of it. The history around the use of those weapons is rather vague really. There may have been a couple uses, but it was not his favorite way to use chemical weapons.

      • The Wanderer

        We were toting a stockpile of it off the coast of Italy. Nobody would have found out about it if a German bomb hadn’t hit the transport.

      • Technically neither did Assad, he used them in an attack on civilians.

        fuck me you’re dumb

        • h4rr4r

          You know what a civil war is?

          The whole nation is a battlefield.

          Go troll someone else.

          • Right so terrorism targeting civilians is a justifiable tactic when used in a civil war

            I repeat – fuck me you’re dumb

          • h4rr4r

            Hell no, it’s a war crime.

            Now go troll someone else.

          • When you stop trying to justify war crimes

          • h4rr4r

            I have not ever done that.

            Have fun under your bridge.

      • HazooToo
        • h4rr4r

          Good find.

          Today we use fuel air weapons in those situations. I am not really sure how that is different. Not saying what they did was acceptable, but that what we do today is scarily similar.

          • HazooToo

            I’ve given it a surface read, and I’m kind of leaning towards different. I can’t be sure, since again “surface read” and the only thing I have personally experienced is our military tear gas, I have no real detailed knowledge of chemical weapons. Still, it seems that this does count as Hitler using chemical weapons on the battlefield.

          • h4rr4r

            Like I said not a lot, and how much he knew about it is up for debate. He hated chemical weapons in war due to his own exposure.

            We can agree it counts though.

          • HazooToo

            What I think you’re trying to do, here and with the United story, is cut through the emotion surrounding these things, look at what was actually said and done by the parties involved. If I’m right, then I understand where you’re coming from. But personally, I’m mad about United because it’s ethically and morally wrong that they’re going to get away with it. And I’m mad about what Spicer said, because there are millions of asshats who will believe him and pass it around as “fact” and who already deny the Holocaust happened and was as bad as it was. I’m angry as hell, and I think we should be talking about changing things for the better. That doesn’t mean I don’t understand the reality, though. This is my place to get MAD about a Thing. If that’s NOT what you’re trying to do, I apologize for assuming.

          • h4rr4r

            It is kind of my thing, yeah.

            Emotion and hate are to me how we got Trump. We liberals are better than that, at least I kind of hope so.

          • HazooToo

            I hope so, too! And yes, we need people to remind us of the facts of the matter, so that once we’re done being outraged and offended, we can construct an argument that can’t be defeated by blind rage and hate. But yeah, there are also times we need to just get pissed off, especially since a lot of the crap that’s getting pulled on us is so infuriating. I suggest talking about your viewpoint during the Open Thread in one big thing, tonight.

    • Oblios_Cap

      But America did use atomic weapons.

    • Asterix

      So, according to Spicy, Hitler wasn’t such a bad guy… what the everloving fuck is wrong with these assholes? I hope this explodes the interwebs.

      • Bill D. Burger

        Indeed! And, additonally, in WW II, Japan used gas against the Chinese.

        • And Mussolini used it against the Ethiopians

        • h4rr4r

          The entire history of what exactly the Japanese did in WW2 has sort of been largely glossed over.

          • Oblios_Cap

            They raped Nanking!

          • The Wanderer

            So badly, in fact, that the Nazis were shocked.

          • The Wanderer

            We can lay some of that on MacArthur.

          • h4rr4r

            I think we can lay that on a lot of people. Hitler too, I mean it was hard enough getting what the Nazi’s did into our Western Culture.

            There are still living WW2 veterans and yet Nazism is back on the rise in the USA.

          • The Wanderer

            True. If we had more WW2 vets punching Nazis instead of voting for Trump, we might be a happier nation.

        • grindstone

          And the Germans used mustard gas (first) in WWI. Has this eedjit never had a history class? Watched Discovery channel? Listened to a freaking podcast?

          • The Wanderer

            And before the mustard gas, it was chlorine, and on the Eastern Front they tried xylyl bromide.

        • aureolaborealis

          And didn’t Churchill need to be restrained by his military advisors from using chemical weapons against the Germans in WWII?

    • Opalescent Riddles

      There aren’t enough facepalms in the world for this.

    • calliecallie

      How is it possible Sean Spicer can be such a terrible spokesmodel?
      Also, too, Napalm. Just saying.

  • MizzMazz

    Off to work loves, Friday for me, and here’s another Friday song:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCgNCczbixc

  • diogenez

    Bad DNA poster children.

  • not_vh

    “there is no Russia tie.”

    the tie is chinese and so are scarfs, bags, and hats.

    • elviouslyqueer

      But the underwear is totes “Hecho en Mexico,” obvs.

  • Paperless Tiger

    As usual, only Russia wants an investigation of the incident. USA don’t need no stinking investigation. First, we already made up our mind, and second, we’re gonna bomb both sides anyway, so what’s the difference?

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Of all the people in America, it turns out Ivanka is the one person Little Donnie trusts. Is that remarkable good fortune? Genetics? Or psychosis?

    (Waiting for Mother-of-three Ivanka to tell her Daddy about American children killed by guns while in school.)

    • h4rr4r

      Reverse oedipus complex?

  • The Wanderer

    “My father will act in times like that.”

    That simple, badly-constructed sentence just scared the ever-livin’ fuck out of me.

  • memzilla Ω

    O/T Nice Time! “Since Trump’s election, models and staff members have been fleeing his agency. Industry sources told Mother Jones last week that this was a direct result of Trump’s divisive politics, which have made his brand toxic in the modeling world.” Where’s he gonna get his next wife from now? SAD. WEAK. FAILING.

    . https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7399688d3d22298d2004732e1075b76de93e246635c98e46a256f76f2e5b677d.jpg

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

    They’re really getting worried, aren’t they? Someone must be getting close to the smoking gun!

    • vivian

      Eric, it’s China. The ties are made in China.
      Oh, and Syria didn’t validate a fucking thing other than the CIC is a simple-minded reactionary who will do ANYTHING to avoid accountability or even scrutiny into his collusion with Russia.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    She only said that after reviewing her monthly sales report from Syria. Bitch was pissed.

    • Indivisible Snark Tank

      Do they even have a TJ Maxx in Syria?

      • wide_stance_hubby

        My comments will not be dictated by facts, thank you.

  • William
    • Where’s that medal for tidiness?

    • kareemachan

      Aside from its puke-making aspect, the thing that bugs me the most is how hard he has to *try* to smile.

  • Joe Beese

    Can we be sure that Bill Clinton didn’t bomb Serbia because the then 19 year old Chelsea was angry about having some bad pljeskavica at a Serbian restaurant?

    Can be absolutely sure?

  • elviouslyqueer

    Beavis Trump needs to sit the entire fuck down. Preferably squarely on Dinesh’s face.

  • memzilla Ω

    O/T Nice Time! “Since Trump’s election, models and staff members have been fleeing his agency. Industry sources told Mother Jones last week that this was a direct result of Trump’s divisive politics, which have made his brand toxic in the modeling world.” Where’s he gonna get his next wife from now? SAD. WEAK. FAILING.
    . https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7399688d3d22298d2004732e1075b76de93e246635c98e46a256f76f2e5b677d.jpg

  • goonemeritus

    Now I feel bad that I’ve never bombed a sovereign nation for either of my kid’s.

    • Crystalclear12

      It’s the thought that counts.

      • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

        It’s the thought crime that counts in this case.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Here’s the problem for me: I don’t care whether Ivanka had all the feels after seeing the pictures of dead children. She’s not the “president”. The “president” has military advisors, a State Department, a Cabinet, and the advice of analysts, historians, foreign-policy experts, and any number of respected figures in political science to advise him. The fact that he appears to have listened to his daughter is troubling. It’s like hearing that your doctor relies on Tarot cards. If your doctor had nukes, that is.

    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      Honestly, it’s more likely that Mattis is cutting through the BS.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Agree. I also hate the fact that Ivanka Trump is a grown woman, not a fluffy teenager, that should know better than to insert herself into global affairs with zero experience. A pox on their house.

    • jesterpunk

      Trump doesnt listen to any of those fancy book leaned people, he takes security briefings from Fox and Friends, Breitbart and Sean Hannity. So its really not surprising he would listen to Ivanka about this/

  • William
  • Crystalclear12

    Yep, disappointed in Slate.

    • puredog

      The Slate article is not easy on Trump — “this mountain of Russia-related evidence that his closest associates are for the most part corrupt, grifting sleazeballs” — it just suggests that we may not get ALL the nice things eventually, and if we speculate wildly (in other, more benighted venues, this is not recognized as something it would be irresponsible NOT to do), and get out too far in front of the evidence, we start to sound like birthers.

  • Relativicus

    Qusay’s my favorite so far because I think he’s starting to really like the attention (based on the increasing number of statements I’ve seen). Like the rest of the clan, he has zero understanding of the position he’s in and I suspect all members of the clan are beginning to think they can do and say just about anything at any time. So it’s only a matter of time before Qusay drops a monumentally large turd somewhere.

  • DrBigHead

    The tweet by Kaczynski says it all, doesn’t it?

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    OT: Spicey tells reporter not even Hitler used gas on people. So, Zyklon B was just a skin revitalizer?

    • William
    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      He means on people not in concentration camps. Hitler didn’t gas soldiers.

      • Manders

        Yeah, Assad didn’t gas soldiers, either.

        • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

          For the most part, yes. Point taken.

          • Tennessee Rain

            Sorry, I hope you didn’t think I was dog piling on you. You were being kind in trying to give that moron the benefit of the doubt. He doesn’t deserve it.

        • h4rr4r

          Yeah, but in a civil war who is and is not a combatant and where they are is rather fluid.

          • Manders

            Babies? Are they combatants?

          • h4rr4r

            Not usually, but they could be in places where combatants had been.

            Also civil wars often include war crimes like collective punishment.

          • Manders

            I feel like you’re being a little pedantic here. Spicer did not say “on the battlefield.” He said “Hitler didn’t even sink to using chemical weapons.” And then when someone pointed out that he used the gas chambers, he clarified that Hitler didn’t use them “on his own people like Assad did.” I’m sure some of the people who died in the gas chambers were German and Austrian Jews.

            The point is that what Spicer said was dumb. As usual.

          • h4rr4r

            Valid.

            If you really want to make it even worse for Spicey, Hitler gassed Germans who were not gay, jewish, mentally handicapped, etc. He had folks gassed for getting sick.

          • puredog

            Syrian babies? Sure. They be BAMFs.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        He means people, not Jews, gypsies and gays. Duh.

        • h4rr4r

          You forgot the mentally handicapped, those with TB, those with family members that had TB, the infirm, those with psychological issues, union organizers, political dissenters, etc

      • eyelashviper

        He preferred people who were not captured and put in camps.

      • Tennessee Rain

        Here’s the quote:
        “You had someone as despicable as Hitler, who didn’t even sink to using chemical weapons,”
        He didn’t clarify his stupidity until asked about it by a reporter. FFS, that man simply cannot stop stepping on his own crank.

    • The Wanderer

      Spicer’s not even a good liar, let alone a half-decent Mouth of Sauron.

      • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

        He called Assad, Bassad al-Ashar.

        • The Wanderer

          Is it decent Internet etiquette to say “SMH” now?

          • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

            IDK.

          • Master Contrail Program

            IWBINTS.

        • PubOption

          I suppose being called Spooner is better than being called Sphincter.

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson
    • Vincent Ricola

      And then another reporter gave him a chance to walk it back and Melissa went on to reemphasize the point.

      • tapp_my_wire,please

        We can excuse his tone deafness from Donald yelling at him about his choice of suits

    • WeaselPoo

      Spicer at tomorrow’s presser:
      Those are your words, steve! What I SAID was that Hitler didn’t use gas OVENS on people—

    • h4rr4r

      Technically a pesticide.

      • tapp_my_wire,please

        Right. The Germans had a troubling definition of who/what were pests.

        • The Wanderer

          Having your leaders tossing about words like Untermensch and Giftzwerg will make people start believing them.

        • h4rr4r

          They sure thought it was a big category and man was it easy to move people from column A to column B.

      • The Wanderer

        Technically, yes. Ever read the labels on that can of ant & roach killer in your cupboard? Some of them are acetylcholinesterase inhibitors – essentially, nerve gas.

    • eyelashviper

      He needs more props to illustrate his point…like in calling for the banning of evil Moose Lambs

      https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gnBeDHJSULg/hqdefault.jpg

      • tapp_my_wire,please

        She hosts SNL 5/13. Will Spicey still be around?

        • eyelashviper

          Goody, goody, looking forward to it!

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Used topically as a mild de-jewant, it’s perfectly safe.

    • Tennessee Rain

      No. Just no. No. He did not. Please tell me that he’s not that big of an idiot.

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    “Ivanka is by his side in Washington. She is not involved in everything. I think she comes and goes with issues she deeply cares about but when you get to a certain level of power a lot of times, and you see this in business too, a lot of times people will say yes just because you happen to be the boss”

    1. Cares about =/= knows about. Some of us prefer to have decisions about the use of military force based on strategy, not emotions.

    2. The yes-people are relevant to this issue because…?

    3. Oh, for fuck’s sake.

    • mailman27

      #3 is gonna be getting a workout for the foreseeable future.

  • Srsly, The Media, can you honestly stop just squirrelling over every goddamn distraction they spoon feed to you and keep your eyes on the “I brought down the ‘president’ with my reporting” prize here? That’s journalist gold, right there.

  • Crystalclear12

    There is evidence that Russia supplied the gas and was aware of its use and bombed a HOSPITAL to cover it up. Trump’s response was to let Russia know about the bombing ahead of time despite the fact the airstrike was designed to do minimal damage.

    More plot holes than a time travel movie.

    • Master Contrail Program

      How did the T-1000 get through the portal anyway? And why not just send a nuke wrapped in synthetic flesh back through?

    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      Common sense says there was evidence Russia was at least aware of it all from the beginning.

      1. You need a lot of expensive special equipment to produce Sarin, let alone any quantity of it. And many of the chemical agents that produce it are dangerous themselves. You don’t whip it up in a garage

      2. There would be folks in contamination suits carrying atrophine .and decontamination equipment on hand while loading the weapons. Kind of hard to hide that from your Russian comrades who co-occupy the base.

      3. Assad, for all practical purposes, is dependent on Russian military assistance, and he knows that, and the Russian military is fully integrated into the chain of command.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Maybe this IS a Time Travel Movie….

    • mailman27

      If time travel existed it would always have existed.

  • schmannity

    Ivanka’s just like that about people being gassed. Once, a doorman farted at Trump Tower and Ivanka had daddy have him pistol whipped.

    • SeeTrain65

      Bannon: “Mr. President, our spies in Syria report a gas attack and want to know what to do.”

      Trump: “Tell them to take a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda in half a glass of water.”

      (My apologies to Groucho Marx for ruining his joke, and to all of you for making it appear Trump knows what he’s doing.)

  • WeaselPoo

    FYI Evan, I gather it’s Hughes-Raytheon, and guess who owns shares in that company what makes the cruise missiles used against Syria?
    Go on guess. I’ll give you 92 guesses…you’ll never guess!!! Go on, guess!!!!

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      It’s Twitler this time, isn’t it?

      • WeaselPoo

        here’s a hint….you are correct.

  • Bureaucrap

    Ivanka Trump: The Violet Beauregard of American government.

    • Jamoche

      I see her as more of a Veruca Salt.

  • Undocumented Skwerl!

    it’s like the Democratic Party is populated by people who think through issues

    Trump promised us taco trucks. Where are they!!!!!

    • BeachBum

      Now I’m all hongree !

    • puredog

      That was only if he lost. Which makes me even MORE tired of winning.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    Here’s another thing: before he ran for office, the opinion I had of Dump was that he was basically a dumbass, and a slick clown with the kind of smile that makes your whole body clench. Now that we’ve had to endure 115,000 months of his campaign, and 13 years or whatever of his monarchy, the opinion that I have of him is that he is an evil dumbass, a slick clown with the kind of smile that makes your whole body clench, and that he appears to have never, at any time, demonstrated a single likeable quality, which is astounding; even Hitler, for crysakes, liked dogs.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      I can’t say as I have heard the man actually laugh yet. That alone is disturbing as hell.

  • eyelashviper
  • BigCSouthside

    Even if none of this were true,

    Syria is perhaps the single most complicated situation in the Middle East, and the president admitted he attacked them unconstitutionally based on EMOTION.

    That’s 25th amendment worthy

  • BreakingDeadMen

    Does anybody else feel like Eric should never talk?

    • wide_stance_hubby

      All of us, BDM.

      • BreakingDeadMen

        Well, we think no Trumps should ever talk (except maybe Melania if she wants to write a tell-all), but I wonder if anyone on the Dark Side gets its that everything he says hurts them.

        • vivian

          Her tell-all would be about how excited everyone was when they passed the ACA.

        • arglebargle

          “I vas born a poooor black child.”

  • Chadwells
  • Panika MCD

    did Eric just take their opportunity to misdirect the public’s attention and say to a journalist, “you know what this would be great for? misdirecting the public’s attention!” and then the journalist asks, “from what?” and he says, “from that Russia thing which is…um…not a thing. thing….?”

  • mfp

    jaayzus F capn crunch khaa-ryst…how do any of these dumbasses get ANY-fucking thing done when they’re on the twitters 24-7?…if i was twittering on my job all day long as these assholes are, i’d be immediately fired and escorted off the premises…good thing they dont allow no commentin’ on this here blog, or i’d never get anything done, either

  • Asterix

    What the fuck is a Holocaust Center?

    Thankfully the twitters are going ape-shit with this, but my head is going to explode with anger. These people are too stupid to be believed!

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Auschwitz

  • MamaBrown

    “and also those pictures of gassed Syrian beautiful little babies gave me some feels in my heart”

    Silly billies! Ivanka does not have a heart. Well, maybe a pink Wedgwood heart shaped box she keeps her kids’ baby teeth in, or a heart shaped diamond clip for her golden hair that her super hot student council president husband gave her as a push present for baby number three. This woman has ice water in her veins.

    • eyelashviper

      And her step mom eats jewelry for breakfast…such a fambly.

      • MamaBrown

        “let them eat diamonds!” its the new “let them eat cake”!

        • eyelashviper

          Preferably Trump Diamonds…actually cubic zirconia, but with the gold Trump box, you pay and pay and pay.

  • BigCSouthside

    If someone tells me they’re republican I immediately think “oh. So you’re fucking stupid. Noted”

    That last poll just adds more validity to that thought.

    • The Wanderer

      I like to think I’m in remission, thank you.

  • snigsy

    So Donald J Trump, the new sheriff in town, is Marshal Bing Bell? Makes sense, I guess.

    • WeaselPoo

      Trump is the Sheriff of a Syrian town? WOW, that’s ironic

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    The first lesson when it comes to international diplomacy or any form of governance: Don’t let personal feelings rule the agenda.

    *flip! out of the building!*

  • William

    *sigh*. I miss my President. You know? The one with the one wife that speaks English and the two normal kids. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/23809d5346da059b34422935f9ca370fe22ebd107e60a43363652314845e6018.jpg

  • Vecchioivan

    As long as we’re dealing out life and death around the globe on such a whimsical basis, maybe some one should show Ivanka some pictures of Syrian refugees.

    • bookish

      We have today’s winner.

    • snark-lurker

      and ask her point blank & in public WTFH!!!

    • Pilotshark

      think the one of the little bot face down in the water, would be a go to one for her.

  • Jgb979

    “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

    All it shows is that Putin’s judgment might not be as strong as it was once assumed to be by backing Donald Trump for president and expecting him to behave rationally.

    Those ties are still there, only an Eric would think they’ve magically gone away because of a stage-managed show of no force.

    • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨

      Putin isn’t that smart. Unfortunately, neither are most of us.

    • vivian

      1. The ties are from China
      2. The collusion is with Russia

  • DoILookAmused2u? Résistance☨
    • The Wanderer

      Agreed. Next!

    • Jgb979

      Oh and we missed….

      • jesterpunk

        They did make a little pothole in the runway.

      • cmd resistor

        Early on I saw some references to airplanes being destroyed, but since no one is talking about it anymore I guess that was fake news?

    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Uhhh, that’s 59 cruise missiles, Libtard!

  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    And the moral of this week’s stories is DO NOT FLY. In fact, do no not go near an airplane, airstrip, helicopter, airport, air mattress, air popper, air conditioner, or bird.

    • The Wanderer

      “We’re all hostages when the wheels come up.” – attributed to John Madden.

    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      Easy for you to say. You already LIVE in paradise…

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        I’m already trying to figure how to get to NC without flying. Looks like I will make it home just in time for my sister’s graduation if I start swimming now and the sharks leave me alone.

        • snark-lurker

          show some leg on the docks & hitch a ride with a freighter

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Boats are good, then I’ll run across the nation, Forrest Gump-style.

          • snark-lurker

            i will be happy to watch you bounce & jiggle thru iowa

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Or crawl through, begging for a pizza, either way…

          • snark-lurker

            you will end up flying, mirite?

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Oh, yes. Flights are booked. I hate to fly, but if you move to Hawaii and ever wish to see home again, flying is part of the bargain. I need Xanax or a rhino tranquilizer.

          • snark-lurker

            mee too break a leg

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Do a layover in San Diego and I’ll hook you up.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            I will keep that in mind! I really don’t fly well, and my sister, who is coming back to Maui with me for 5 weeks (so excited!!!!!!) as her graduation gift, doesn’t either. We are splitting the trip and staying in a hotel in Seattle for a night before flying the rest of the way to Maui the next morning. I am flying straight through on the way there, though, changing planes at LAX and on to Atlanta. I would LOVE to split the trip in San Diego next time!!

          • CindyinEncinitas

            That sounds like fun.

        • The KGB Ate Our Votes

          For fun we once googled walking directions from Chicago to Hawaii. After (virtually) walking for weeks we eventually came to the California coast, where we were instructed to “kayak 2,471 miles”. I love that.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Your arms would be totally ripped!

          • BeachBum

            I did not love that.

    • weejee

      FWIW, United lost $800M in cap value. The Market truly busted a cap on those bastards.

      • BeachBum

        IMO the Market smells something bad and don’t wanna be left holding a bag of dog shit.

    • C4TWOMAN

      Or bee.

  • DerpyGurdyMan
  • Asterix

    April Ryan’s reaction to Spicy’s comment is priceless – she whips her head up and looks around like, WTF? It’s great.

  • BigCSouthside

    Someone show Ivanka the special reports on kids being poisoned in Flint.

    Oh wait, nothing will happen because you can’t theatrically bomb water pipes until they are cleaner to boost your approval rating

    And also Ivanka is an asshole and probably wouldn’t care.

    • snark-lurker

      “–Ivanka is a ‘asshole’…” is way too charitable

      • BigCSouthside

        I fucking despise her. When I hear her voice I get visibly angry.

        She and Ann Coulter are why we keep the C word around

  • eyelashviper

    That gene pool was damaged long ago, and is still spreading…the CDC should consider a quarantine.

  • zerosumgame0005

    well, here is a little Nice Time (TM) for all you W-ette’s

    https://politicalwire.com/2017/04/11/wilson-gets-taste-medicine/

    • Roni Raven, Just Microwavin’

      HAHAHAHAHA Good.

    • weejee

      Karma can be such a bitch.

  • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

    Donnie is retweeting Dinesh D’Ipshit now? Sad. Weak!

  • William
    • eyelashviper

      Spicey looks more shopworn by the day…soon the springs will shoot out of his eyes, and he will droop over and vibrate before the last electrode dies.

      • snark-lurker

        what kind of springs he haz in his eyes, leaf or coil?

        • eyelashviper

          I dunno, but they were made in China.

    • h4rr4r

      Wow, just wow.

  • Thaumaturgist

    According to Rep. Justin Amash, R-Mich., Trump & Ryan gave House Republicans a sheet with talking points to take home to their constituents over the Easter Break. http://www.cnn.com/2017/04/10/politics/justin-amash-paul-ryan-speaker/
    You suppose they sent out a sheet of talking points to the Trumpkids?

    • The Wanderer

      It’s possible.
      Bets on any of those talking points actually getting an airing at the town hall meetings?

    • weejee
      • An Outhouse for the Resistance

        Those are nice sheets for the talking heads.

    • BeachBum

      It is NOT FAIR to give homework over spring break !
      Poor House GOP can’t be trusted to talk on their own.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Talking points or connect the dots?

      • CindyinEncinitas

        Word search they copied from a Denny’s placemat.

  • tapp_my_wire,please
    • Bub, Zombie of the Resistance

      I think that’s her “OMG! I just ovulated!” face…

      • tapp_my_wire,please

        The staff had towels on hand to dry out the chair later.

      • eyelashviper

        Or, “Oh, it’s you and not Daddy.”

    • Persistent Demme

      You’re sitting next to MEEEEEE?!

      (WTH is she even doing there?)

      • janecita

        I don’t know, but she looks pretty fucking stupid doing it.

        • Damian L

          So does he

    • Pilotshark

      wonder if she had her green or maybe blue contacts in? because brown eyes and Justin well,

    • snark-lurker

      “fuck me. please fuck me!”

    • wide_stance_hubby

      She’s always wondered what having sex with a man was like.

  • Nephilim

    I love it when the media calls them Trump’s adult children.

  • William
    • The KGB Ate Our Votes

      Funny how their faces and body language perfectly reflect our feelings about them and their presidencies.

      • h4rr4r

        One is a generally happy fellow trying to do his best who believes the world is generally full of people like him, the other is a miserable fraudster who believes the world is generally full of people like him.

        • Pamelarsmith

          Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours & have longer with friends and family! !sq286c:
          On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
          !sq286c:
          ➽➽
          ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialCashJobs576DigitalDesignerGetPaid$97/Hour ★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫★★★✫::::::!sq286c:….,….

      • Cathy Cambridge and Michelle Obama bring the coat porn.

        I wonder if they talk smack about the trumps.

        • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

          What was Conway’s coat? Snuff porn?

          • A gift to late night comedy.

          • WotsAllThisThen

            Alternative fashion.

          • Sarah E. Grove

            Nutcracker Fashion (also known as “Nutcase Fashion.)

        • mailman27

          And boots. Rawwwr

        • I’m sorry but bare legs in January is just plain stupid.

          • please. i had bare legs all over chicago in january.

            and i have long legs.

          • Well, I’m glad you admit it. 😁

      • snark-lurker

        and unlike Donnie’s base, we got all the toothy grins

    • resisting and persisting

      Wow, the body language in that photo…

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    Eventually people have to say “Both sides do it… but this side is definitely doing it a lot more”… right?

    • jesterpunk

      That wont happen, they will have to be fair and balanced.

      • And get more SCOTUS nominees.

  • PixieThis

    As heartbreaking as the Syrian civil war is, you can’t make decisions like this from an emotional point of view. It’s stupid, it’s short-sighted and it doesn’t allow for a long term plan because you’re just jumping from one emotional response to another. These people are pig-ignorant.

    • h4rr4r

      Thank you.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Instead of emotions they are supposed to use logic? We are so fucked!

    • Brendan_M

      You try looking your daughter, Ivanka, in her eyes, her supple breasts, her shapely hips, and try saying no!

      • Bebecca

        I’m sitting in my office trying not to LOL

    • Rick Hill

      Also, they are admitting the strike was emotionally driven but the woman who ran was the one who would let her feelings drive her decisions

    • HogeyeGrex

      It’s stupid, it’s short-sighted and it doesn’t allow for a long term plan

      So, basically, the Republican party platform.

    • phoenix00
      • reesespbcbt$$

        Very interesting article.
        Thank you.

    • Keith Taylor

      It’s way too complex for a Trump mind. It’s way too complex for my mind too. We have Bashar al-Assad, a rotten murderous tinpot tyrant at present the boss of Syria. We have Islamic State, or ISIS, with due apologies to the great Egyptian goddess, or Daesh, a rotten murderous movement of fundamentalist killers led by a former thug and current fanatic, even nastier now than he was in his youth, in bloody conflict with al-Assad. We have rebels against the Assad regime who are not part of Daesh. We have the Kurds, who seem to be right in the meat-grinder in every dirty Middle Eastern situation — but are not all sweethearts and nice guy heroes even so. We have Russia supporting al-Assad against both Daesh and the rebels … I think … and now we have Donald Trump using the situation to distract from his own Russian ties. Or that’s how it looks. Plus I don’t know how many other factors about which I have not one clue.
      And Trump — TRUMP — thinks he can be one blind bit of use to resolve this?

  • guppy06

    if Daddy says we should do something, Daddy’s right, because Daddy’s always right

    Ivanka calls him “Daddy” in bed and yet he’s always the one in diapers…

    Trump sex is weird. And I’ve been on the internet for years.

  • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

    Paraphrasing, but Spicer just said that even Hitler didn’t use chemical weapons, well, not on his own people like Assad did.
    German Jews? German they may be but people they aren’t. Got it!

    • Brendan_M

      Trump upset his “alt-Right” base with the Syria attack, but nothing gets those guys back on board faster than some Holocaust denial.

  • Rick Hill

    He said: “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

    This is both a “tell” and what passes for deep thinking among the wealthy “elites”.

    • sgt. jmk of the résistance

      Be fair – Eric is deeply stupid, so it took a lot of effort for him to remember the talking point that precisely.

  • canes_pugnaces

    Thankfully, Assad is worse than Hitler. Cause Hitler never used naughty banned chemicals to kill people. Only cheap motel shampoo in the showers. Which caused lots and lots of tears. That’s why we have to call Putin and tell him we’re going to have a fireworks display. Because Hitler never killed anyone.

    • CindyinEncinitas

      I thought it was a trade show.

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      Zyclon B was legal at the time so it was okay.

  • WotsAllThisThen

    God if Ivanka ever sees those infomercials about starving children in Africa we’re in for a real world war.

    • Resistance Ftr PuckStopsHere

      If this Russia scandal gets any worse we are also too in for a real WW.

    • Red Bird Ω

      As long as they stay in Africa. Otherwise they would be thugs.

  • Michael Smith

    Those poll results also have something to do with racism and bloodlust in Republican voters.

  • C4TWOMAN
  • HogeyeGrex

    Actually, I’d be more in favor of Obama doing it. If for no other reasons than I don’t think he’d do it for purely political reasons and I do think he’d do it competently.

  • not_vh

    iVanka smart phoney

    • An Outhouse for the Resistance

      ‘smart’

  • An Outhouse for the Resistance

    Ivanka must have been OTR.

  • Apple Scruff

    This is why every single comedy show plays Eric like he’s brain damaged.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9c7ca7720d4f375188ffb8c32b574534f44839f87a4e690ecc8165d32c4c1a5e.gif

    • Me not sure

      Wait… he’s not?

    • phoenix00

      HMM I WONDER WHY

  • Alexander Stallwitz
  • Scooby

    Oh boy, Trump just figured out his get out of jail free card!

  • Mister Smith

    The entire Trumpscum family is a stain on humanity.

    • Chris

      Could you imagine the self image issues you’d have by being the acknowledged dumb one in this family? I’m talking about you Eric.

  • Say Erik, that he warned Pooty before hand and got their say so is proof that he IS connected still.
    QED mother fucker

  • If there was anything that Syria did, it was to validate the fact that there is no Russia tie.”

    WTF? That’s like saying there are no ties between the Iraq military and the U.S.

    4000+ U.S. Troops in Iraq:
    http://mobile.reuters.com/article/idUSKCN1175LN

    4000+ Russian Troops in Syria:
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_military_intervention_in_Syria

    Shut the fuck up Trumpscum Rich White Trash.
    https://media3.giphy.com/media/PTKts9VHNeIhO/giphy.gif

  • Duke

    Putin plays the game at a completely different level and doesn’t care how many people are killed. What’s real? What’s fake? What was done to make something happen so it can be used?

  • Brad H

    If Drumpf ever does something to piss Putin off, we’ll all be seeing pee hooker videos. Just sayin’.

  • phoenix00
    • Zyxomma

      Thanks, that was excellent.

  • Sarah E. Grove

    Somebody ought to sit the entire fucking Trump family down, tie them to the chairs and make them watch a new documentary on HBO called “Cries from Syria.” It was difficult to watch, but it was incredibly informative. Assad has been slaughtering his own people with Russia’s substantial help for years now.

    It’s a truly amazing film.

  • EmmaChuur

    He said: “If there was anything that Syria did, it was to “validate” the “fact” that there is no Russia tie.”

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