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Guys guys guys, the world’s greatest interview took place on the BBC, and it was so good, and I laughed SO HARD, please please please just this once watch the video.

Oh my god, the darling little girl walking in all DURR DA DURR DA DURR, and the dad is so lame, and then the baby in the walker breaking the LAND SPEED BABY WALKER RECORD and then the mom, and the crying, and the dad can’t get up cuz you know Mr. North Korea Foreign Policy Esspert ain’t wearing no pants.

Don’t you think we should watch it again???

YES.

Now cometh a womyn, for to shit on it.

Basically, the message this video delivers to me is: being a man is playing life on the easy setting. Once again, the yawning awareness of the patriarchy shits on my ability to enjoy something. I can see why so few female Moles are feminists.

Here’s the worst/best bit of the video. When Mr Pundit doesn’t even turn round to acknowledge his child, but instead gives the little tyke a gentle shove to get out of the way.

Feminist Mole, that is not the best part of the video. The best part of the video is ALL OF IT, and how each piece builds on the previous!

If a woman had done that, we wouldn’t be sharing the video while wiping tears of laughter from our eyes. We’d be knee-deep in a tedious discussion about whether she’s a terrible mother and whether her career of Korea Takes was leading her to ignore the small, simple pleasures of watching a child dance like a loon.

Mole, nobody thinks the dad is awesome. Everyone thinks the dad is — at best — a douche and at worst a TERRIBLE PARENT. But yes, we don’t know many mothers who would straight-arm their child out of frame; most of us would gather her onto our lap and keep talking. YAY COOL MOMS! BOO LAME DADS!

Also – ALSO – Mr Pundit shoves the kid back with the easy reassurance of someone who knows that another person is going to swoop in and deal with the kids. This, you feel, is the kind of guy who refers to looking after his own children as “babysitting”.

Stretching, Mole. First, there’s no “easy reassurance.” He’s actually quite hapless, and even discombooberated! Second, someone is going to swoop in and deal with the kids because at the moment, DADDY IS ON TEEVEE.

It also exposes one reason why there are more men delivering their opinions all over our televisions most days – because women are doing the behind the scenes work needed to make that feasible. True equality will not have been achieved until we see a father desperately clawing at a baby wheeler while a woman talks about the rising threat of nuclear war.

This is just backwards. Women aren’t on teevee because there’s no slots left after you sign five John McCains to come on your show every Sunday, not because there aren’t people behind the scenes to do their childcare for them. Women work! And they either have paid help, or husbands (sometimes both, but let’s not get crazy!)! Dude doing a TV shot in his home office isn’t the patriarchy; it’s a dude working, like most of us have to. IT’S FINE.

Of course, this is all cruel projection. For all we know Mr Pundit might otherwise be an exemplary hands-on dad. Perhaps he’s changing the nappy of a third, hidden child under the desk with his feet. It’s not his fault that the patriarchy exists, and also annoys me so much.

That’s better. Try to remember that feeling. Because there’s plenty of systemic Real Sexisms to get our menses up about without taking it out on Dork Who Works From Home And Got To Be On TV Once. If that guy’s The Patriarchy, I am the ruthless Catherine the Great.

HUSBAND. PUT THE BABY DOWN AND MIX ME A BEVERAGE. Just drop her anywhere, she’ll bounce.

$
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  • hendenburg2

    How many does it take? One

    How many want to?

    AOT,K

  • Nounverb911
  • ServantToTheStars

    The comedic timing and everything about this makes it one of the greatest videos of all time. Instant classic.

  • Nounverb911
  • Nounverb911
  • janecita

    Dear Lord, the guy didn’t do anything wrong! I would probably have done the same thing he did! The person that was watching the kids, was the one that dropped the ball.

    • puredog

      “Person that was watching the kids” indeed. All the references I have seen claim that she is their mother. The look on her face of panic struck me as more of a “I’m an employee who dropped the ball” look than a “mom” look, but what do I know.

      • janecita

        She has that “shit, I was supposed to keep the kids away from the office” look.

      • Blackest Noobs

        yeah you’re likely right, she handled those kids more like a nanny IMHO.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        That was my immediate impression as well…she’s the nanny, and the kids got out of her sight for 2 seconds, and all heck broke loose.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        I would also bet nanny. And nannies have to go pee sometimes, too. Give her a break. The kids saw their move, and they made it. Better they go into dad’s study than out the front door.

    • Lefty Wright

      I don’t know. I would have picked up the first kid and sat her in my lap. The second one in the baby hoveround would have been more problematic.

      • janecita

        I have the feeling that the guy was business on the top, and party on the bottom. I’ve been there, wearing a nice top and sweat pants, maybe that’s why he didn’t want to get up.

        • Lefty Wright

          Reminds me of what Walter Cronkite said one year when he was anointed the best dressed person on television or some such award. He said he was surprised since no one would be able to tell whether he was even wearing pants.

          • janecita

            Yup, that’s me alright!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Maybe he was wearing boxers with kiss lips on the booty? That’s what I’m going to assume, anyhow.

          • janecita

            Lol!!!!

          • Persistent Demme

            Yep.
            I think I’ll go with that also.

      • puredog

        Yeah, I dunno, the guy looked like he had his “I am a serious pundit in a serious office space” face on, and while yours would have been the more humane response, I can see how he got a little deer-in-the-headlights at the disconnect he was confronted with.

    • Persistent Demme

      Mr. Demme would have acted that way, too.
      It could have been a big deal, and I wonder why the kids were even there.

      (He should have a lock on the door also.)

  • Anna Elizabeth

    If Trix is Katerina Velikya, I shall be Queen Anna Elizabeth the First, and soon the song shall be “God save *Us* from the Queen”.

    • Suse

      Anna! Haven’t seen you in ages. How are you?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Much better, Suse, thanx. :) Moved to a better neighborhood, made friends, found a cute guy.

        • Suse

          Good for you!

  • Blackest Noobs

    this dick could learn a thing or two from our NBA players:

    http://www.foxsports.com/buzzer/story/nba-players-kids-press-conferences-052015

  • Nounverb911
  • Ricky Gay

    “We don’t have a humor section. This is a feminist bookstore!!!”

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    What’s the appropriate music for a purge?
    https://twitter.com/CNN/status/840308533073707008

    • Nounverb911
      • willi0000000

        weren’t we were saving that one for t’Rump?

    • Anna Elizabeth
    • weejee

      Or this?

    • puredog

      That’s easy. A purge dirge.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Molotov!

    • Roni Resistance Raven

      Ride of the Valkyries.

    • Panika MCD

      is he one of them?

    • Undocumented Skwerl!

      Let me guess, they defended the right to vote for black people.

    • Gosala
    • Tio_Doidinho

      Star Wars Imperial March?

    • Persistent Demme

      No, YOU resign!
      (You know you were thinking it.)

    • Serai 1

      Why, when they’ve got so many hundreds of vacancies already?

      • willi0000000

        you need a lot fewer lawyers when you’re not going to prosecute white collar crime.

    • Gosala

      🎶This is how the swamp is drained
      The swamp is drained
      The swamp is drained
      This is how the swamp is drained
      Fire all the attorneys 🎶

      You didn’t think it had anything to do with ending corruption, did you?

      No, silly, it’s about getting rid of the Civil Service in order to increase corruption. Sort of the 1890s all over again.

      Yippee!

    • PubOption
  • ltmcdies

    the self righteous of the internet have either a) forgotten b) never spawned because c) in every parent’s life comes the time their kids do stuff that makes said parent look like a hapless dweeb.

    Seriously…we’ve all been in the grocery aisle or that water park as child screams the place down or pees in the pool.

    And we’ve had the “tut tut” tutters standing there “tutting”…not unlike the Mole Woman who decide her tuts were worth a blog post.

    • Panika MCD

      how can you tell when your kid peed in the pool?

      • Shanzgood

        Have you seen Moana yet?

      • Jenny

        I never notice cuz I peed first!!

      • ltmcdies

        When they stand at the side and treat the pool like one big toilet bowl

        • Panika MCD

          covert: yr kid’s doin’ it wrong.

          • ltmcdies

            thankfully he’s over 30 now and can find a bathroom on his own

          • Panika MCD

            you sure about that?

  • The Librarian

    I almost choked on my beverage when the baby wheelied in. That was the best!!!!! Dad, don’t look so annoyed, makes ya look less human.

    • ltmcdies

      yeh baby speeding in was the best….

      don’t be so hard on dad…we’ve all been “that dad”

      • The Librarian

        True that……

      • janecita

        I’ve been that dad many times, and I’m a mom.

        • Blackest Noobs

          sure, i guess, i mean i’ve had my friends’ kids do that, you know get all interrupty and they ( the parents) get all nutty about it, and im like guys guys it’s cool esse because it’s not a big deal, they’re kids, they’re dumbasses, they don’t know better.

          but funny, all my friends’ kids love the shit outha me because i never get bent when they act like kids…and i don’t talk down to them.

          • janecita

            I used to be like that, until I had kids:-)

          • Blackest Noobs

            listen i totally understand, my mum still hates on my little sister for dumb fucking shit she did ( we’re talking almost going to jail kinda shit) in the past and refuses to see she has changed and is a much better person now than she was….and i didn’t always treat my lil sister with kid gloves but i never stopped believing in her.

            i think i would be the same if i was ever insane enough to have kids.

          • willi0000000

            i waited until my kids were in college to get upset if they interrupted “the adults” . . . they told me off and we went back to the original arrangement.

            [ . . . and when they were in their thirties i interrupted them when they were having “adult” conversations ]

          • willi0000000

            that’s the secret.

      • BloviateMe

        The dad gave up a bit of a laugh, I’m not sure what all the hubbub is.

    • DeliaJones

      srsly.
      lil’ swagger lee was pretty cute, but NEED FOR SPEED baby puts it over the top

    • Blackest Noobs

      no shit….it as if he treated reproducing like a business transaction.

      note to the guy….don’t fucking have kids if you’re gonna be a douche about when kids act like fucking kids.

    • OneYieldRegular

      Every member of the family should get an Emmy award. You can’t create more perfect comic entrances.

  • DeliaJones

    “breaking the LAND SPEED BABY WALKER RECORD”

    no shit eh! the first time i watched i assumed the walker was like, strapped to a Roomba

    • Nounverb911
      • Anna Elizabeth

        Davros called the Mark 1 Mod 0 travel machine “a qualified success”.

        • leemoder

          Needs moar eye-stalk.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            That’s Mod 1.

        • shaar dula

          hey anna. long time no see. howz the gunnery going?

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Hey. :) Haven’t had any time for modelling, but life has gotten much better. New digs, more friends, and lots more fun. :)

            Still looking forwards to building my Abrams kits, tho. :)

          • shaar dula

            great yaar. do share when you get around to it.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sure thing! :)

          • shaar dula

            stick around though. do go disappearing on us.

        • Nockular cavity

          Wait…Daleks are…cats???

          Now it all makes sense.

  • ⭐️ I Am Helpy ⭐️
    • Gosala

      *swoons*

    • CindyinEncinitas

      Kinda looks like Ben Rothlisberger.

  • Panika MCD

    clearly Daddy is working from home for a reason and probably has lunch all over his knickers or he would have done it himself. also too, I would hope that when it’s Mommy’s turn to sit in the teevee chair, he is willing to entertain the childrens while trying to get spaghetti sauce out of Mommy’s pants. but who cares? we don’t wear pants here.

  • Nounverb911
    • Panika MCD

      of course Ted Cruz wears panties. Heidi is the dominant there.

    • notaten

      I once worked in a shop that had “feminine Fridays” when all of the men would wear women’s underwear every Friday. This was in the Navy in the early 90’s.

    • leemoder

      Ecuadorian Bat-Boy Found Alive In Cave!

  • BloviateMe

    He completely lost his train of thought. Hilarious.

  • Panika MCD

    had to share:
    https://twitter.com/85thLegislature/status/840189594268241920/photo/1

    but then Rep. Carol Alvarado (D-Houston) did one better and photoshopped herself in:
    https://twitter.com/RepAlvarado145/status/840233537227935744

    • Msgr_MΩment

      As a physicist, I would like to see more right-hand rule slapping and less action from the left hand.

      Thank you for your compliance.

  • Jenny

    Oh so my ex is making youtube videos now? That’s nice.

  • Gosala

    Frankly, I’d have been happiest of they all had said, “Fuck Korea. Let’s play!”

    • Blackest Noobs

      wait…im part Korean, did i just up voted fuck Korea….man it’s not a good day being a self-hating Korean.

      • janecita

        I’m a self hating Cuban, I’m always talking shit about Cubans from Florida;-)

        • Blackest Noobs

          i don’t talk shit about Koreans unless they are from the South. capitalist pigs and American wannabes…..why can’t you be starving like the real Koreans up north.

          • Blackest Noobs

            p.s. North Korean kimchi is the best….it’s only one ingredient…a rotting cabbage in a paper sack ( they can’t afford glass jars)

          • Gosala

            Yeah. I get that. If my people were American wannabes, I’d hate on them too.

            Wait! What?

        • undercover epicurean

          Those folks are way more Florida than Cuba, so you’re okay.

      • Gosala

        Well, if I’d thought about it I’d have written, “Fuck talking about Korea.”

        I’ve nothing against Korea. (Except the Kim dynasty, nats)

  • Swampay

    Does it help to wonder if the woman swooping in to shuffle out the babbys is a spouse or hired help? I’m thinking it’s the help.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I read elsewhere it was the spouse. Someone found a picture. It sure looks like the spouse.

    • Virginia O’Possum

      Yeah, I thought “nanny” too, when I saw her. I guess I kind of hope a wife wouldn’t seem that terrified that the kids got away and tried to see daddy. I mean, I’d prefer the nanny not feel terrified, either, but that crawling on all-fours in a futile effort to stay out of camera range just speaks to me of the fear of being fired.

    • JMP

      Though it’s hard to be sure as they only came in for a bit and in the background, the woman who grabbed the kids looked Asian and the kids looked biracial, so I would think likely spouse.

  • shastakoala

    I haven’t heard the word discombooberated in forever! Well said. Still chuckling.

  • Serai 1

    Some people just gotta stick their noses into everything.

  • Undocumented Skwerl!
    • SadDemInTex

      Whoa….that can give you a seizure!

      • janecita

        But, you love Trump now!

        • Tio_Doidinho

          Srsrly. This is fast enough to induce seizures. You’re liable if it triggers one.

          • janecita

            Why me? I’m an innocent bystander.

      • Undocumented Skwerl!

        Agreed now you must “see more”

    • Virginia O’Possum

      I’m sorry, but even after I scrolled down this thing was making my whole browser pulsate. Make it stop! Make it stop! ;-)

  • Blackest Noobs

    the kids were breaking in cuz they had solved the mystery and wanted to tell dad.

    the future snoops are slated to replace Daphne and Fred…because lately they haven’t been picking up the slack when it came to mystery solving.

    Scooby and Shaggy have tenure and the “good” weed.

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    Good one Becca. More laughs than any one scene from a Mel Brooks film. Dad is a real life bigger douche than Hedley Lamarr.

  • CindyinEncinitas
    • (((fka_donnie_d)))

      Russian Joke

      Bakery customer: Can I have a poppy seed roll?

      Saleslady: Why don’t ya get a piece o french bread stuffed with heroin, ya damn junkie?

      • Lascauxcaveman

        True story: I failed a drug test – positive for opiates – after chowing down on several poppyseed bagels served at the employee orientation meeting of the company who needed me to take the drug test.

        • (((fka_donnie_d)))

          I’m always curious about that – can’t you sue the lab?

          • Lascauxcaveman

            No harm, no foul. Something about the levels being low enough that it was the bagels, not actual drugs The company told me to to go back and repeat the drug test 5 days later. Meanwhile, I was on the job already. I think the deal was, you just had to get a clean test sometime in the first two weeks or something like that.

        • (((fka_donnie_d)))

          But – a drug test is the only time a positive result is a failure.

  • Nounverb911

    So what drug is John Kasich using?

    https://twitter.com/SopanDeb/status/840320861412446208

    • willi0000000

      like all the other pugs . . . he wants Democrats to be part of the process . . . so if they don’t vote for the final excruciatingly bad product the pugs use it to make them look bad . . . and if they do and it’s a stinker (and it will be) they can blame the Democrats for ruining what was a perfect plan.

      i urge all Democrats to tell the pugs “Medicaid for everybody or nothing!”

  • Crystalclear12

    He will never live this down! It will mentioned in his eulogy, even if it’s 50 years from now.
    As for feminist, yeah, little projecting there.

  • memzilla Ω

    Maybe he’s actually a secret member of the Wonkeratti here, ergo, was working while not wearing pants.

  • Treg Brown
    • Panika MCD
      • undercover epicurean

        I dunno, she looks pretty seaworthy to me.

        • Panika MCD

          except for the flat…grab the CO2 tank! no one likes a flat drink.

      • Virginia O’Possum

        You found my RV!

        • Panika MCD

          great. now all you need to do is retrieve it, pick up all of us starting with Pickwiknext and ship us to John on Maui!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Red Army of Workers and Peasants Partymobile!

        • Panika MCD

          don’t think that one’s mobile. it has a flat tire.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Shoot the mechanic, and have the drivers report for vigorous self-criticism!

          • Ω cynmac will never surrender

            Hence the stop for new tires, duh.

        • That looks like something from Fallout 4

      • Miles Monroe

        That would have made the best Deadhead bus ever.

      • OneYieldRegular

        Please don’t show this vehicle to Real ‘Murcans. Soon they’ll be driving those things around the Houston Beltway.

        • Panika MCD

          it’s got a flat tire. I’d love to see them try.

        • Panika MCD

          they’d also too get dinged by the Houston Toll Authority.

    • Master Contrail Program

      If that’s how Tha 45 Boyz think Da Train works, I’d hate to see how they make their Tootsee Roll.
      .

      • Ω cynmac will never surrender

        Hershey Libelz!!111!!! Unless you are talking about the Hershey Highway and then carry on.

    • shaar dula
      • Reddishrabbit

        Thanks Obama!!

        • shaar dula

          always thank obama. i always do. like today, my morning & evening commutes were “accented” by snow. i said thanks obama, and both trips went by without any untoward problems, except for the blissfully unware co-passenger in the evening who spread belongings all over the seat and almost made me miss my stop, resulting in an unwanted, un-needed, undesired bum-bum contact. thanks obama.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      The Derp is strong with this one.

    • Nounverb911
      • Annercrespo

        Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !mj324d:
        On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
        !mj324d:
        ➽➽
        ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash324MarketClubGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::!mj324d:….,………

    • Biff52

      Trains have tires? Good to know!

  • Panika MCD

    in addition to being the bill filing deadline at the TX lege, it is also too the first day of Suck By Suck Worse and as I still don’t have interwebs at home, my coffee shop is being taken over and CALLIE’S PRECIOUS LITTLE EARS are already being assaulted, I may not be on much this weekend…but Imma see if the other place near me is quiet enough to make a blorg post with the major highlights of the SB6 hearing.

    • leemoder

      Hmm. For you it’s SXSW. For us, it’s when the goddamn Furries come to town.

      • Panika MCD

        it’s also too ACL fest, Fun Fun Fun Fest, Frontera Fest and whatever they come up with next year. also too: the lege is still in session, so there’s a whole other bunch of freaks we’ve gotta deal with.

        • leemoder

          Sweet Molly Ivins! All that and The Lege?! Call out the National Guard; or are they still on Jade Helm clean-up?

          • Panika MCD

            it was 2 Texas State Guard people, not the Texas National Guard. it’s a subtle difference, but one is much smaller and it’s more forgivable for the Gov. to use the former.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Trump Abruptly Orders 46 Obama-Era Prosecutors to Resign
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/10/us/politics/us-attorney-justice-department-trump.html

    This fucking ignorant asshole is a menace to the nation. There has to be a way to get the fucker out of there.

    • TJ Barke

      Coups are risky.

    • leemoder

      We could pull a “Blazing Saddles” and build an exact replica of D.C. with exact copies of everybody in town.

    • shaar dula

      shudder to think what this portends?

      WHY is the question. why should these people have to resign?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        “A person familiar with the calls that have been made said there was no
        advance warning of the move. It came less than 24 hours after Sean
        Hannity, the Fox News commentator who often speaks with Mr. Trump,
        called for a “purge” of Obama appointees at the Justice Department on
        his show.”
        Reason enough for the orange baboon.

        • Mason

          I would say the Deep State stuff that’s coming out from the hacks like Hannity is something to worry about, for sure.

          It isn’t unprecedented though.

          • Serai 1

            It is unpresidented, though.

        • shaar dula

          this is very very ominous.

    • jowgajen

      This is the real damage they can and will do to our institutions.

    • Mason

      Okay, Clinton had Reno purge 93 prosecutors.

      A changing of the guard is to be expected. It happens with nearly every administration. However, GWB did it in the middle of a term. This was the 96

      http://www.cbsnews.com/news/so-is-this-us-attorney-purge-unprecedented-or-not/

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Clinton had a competent team and competent replacements in mind. God only knows what Bannon has in mind (Trump has nothing in mind.)

        • Mason

          I don’t disagree with the sentiment, for sure. In fact I’m more worried about the Deep State sh*t that Hannity is promoting, asking when they’ll be arrested and all that.

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      The ghouls at Judicial Watch have at least 46 interns, one of which who can nail Hillary for feeding the wildlife.

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      Eliminating possible Special Counsels/Independent Prosecutors?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Making sure they’re all Trumpanzees.

  • SadDemInTex

    It’s like Greta Garbo in Ninotchka before she smiles. Sheesh, could you guys maybe expend the energy dealing with the dumpster fire that is our government right now?

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Do you have a metric for when we’ve stressed enough?

      • SadDemInTex

        Hmmm…not sure what we are talking about. I find humorless dissections of political points of view remincient of how Garbo speaks as a Soviet agent in Paris. (Which, of course, is funny as satire). I have always greatly disliked the theoretical pontificating of the proponents of French theorists like Foucault.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Ah. And this is something you enjoy cosplaying?

          • SadDemInTex
          • Carpe Vagenda

            Um. I was more wondering about humorless and tendentious than unfeminist. Because, you know, telling people not to enjoy Friday night because it means they don’t care about the troubles of the world and they’re cartoonish. Which isn’t how I generally picture you, so I’m confused.

          • SadDemInTex

            Wow, we are totally confused! I was saying just the opposite…I’m all for humor and sometimes you really do have to take time off from the insanity around us and just have fun. I was agreeing with our beloved Wonkette about this subject. It’s the article they are laughing about that makes me want to scream. I just had kidney surgery 2 weeks ago. I’m not sure I’m completely coherent yet🙂

          • Carpe Vagenda

            Ohhh. OK. Definitely not what I thought you were saying. But I’m at the end of three weeks of twenty hours OT myself. Sorry…

  • jowgajen

    Ok, this video is ALL ABOUT that nanny trying to save the situation by crawling on the floor to (not) avoid the camera angle. Hy-fucking-sterical.

    Dad could have been a little more graceful, but jeesh it was his big moment to talk about his work on CNN. Cut him some slack.

    • Scrofula

      Dude prolly only had 90 seconds to pitch his point.

    • Reddishrabbit

      I have no idea if I’d be any better at all, live TV interviewing about a major moment in my field that 99% of the time no one I know cares about and only a short window to say so much.

    • Manhattan123

      Also, it was The BBC. But, hey, you got the hysterical right.

  • Jenny

    The babeh wheeling in was hilarious. Time for babeh to walk!

    • Panika MCD

      that babby ain’t gonna walk! he’s gonna roll!

  • Shanzgood

    Reminds me of when my cousin was doing a reading for his latest book release and his wife let their 2yo have the run of the place as if he were just giving a casual slide show presentation to a few close friends at home. To his credit, every time the babby wandered up to mess with him he just picked her up and kept on talking. Almost as if he’d become accustomed to it.

    It really grated my cheese, though, because I’m pretty sure there’s no way his wife would have tolerated the same while SHE was at work. It was not cute.

    • snark-lurker

      Whut?! R-u trying to say.

      • Shanzgood

        I’m not saying it’s the same, just that it *reminded* me of the incident with my cousin. The vid above was an accident, though. That’s why it was funny. The thing with my cousin was NOT. I seriously almost got up outta my chair to take my babby cousin to go play somewhere else.

        • snark-lurker

          Oh. Ok. I just spaced out for awhile. I do that.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Well, yeah. I work from home and the super thinks he can take me away from my bon bons whenever it’s convenient for him.

      However, someone has to answer the phone/the door so the sound doesn’t bother daddy, people occasionally have to go to the bathroom, and daddy should have locked his door.

      • Shanzgood

        That “lock the door, dumbass” thought was one of my first. After I stopped laughing.

        • Miles Monroe

          Nope, doesn’t work; just makes them SCREAM because they can’t get in …

    • snark-lurker

      Yoo & Carpe Vag givin me a confuzion

    • Serai 1

      Yes, thanks. People dumping on the dad and I’m thinking, “Dad’s at work, how come Mom isn’t keeping an eye on the kids?” If that even is the mom. It could just be a nanny or sitter. Either way, it’s not the dad’s fault that the kid barged in when he shouldn’t be there.

      • HazooToo

        That yes. It’s not Dad’s fault, not the kids fault either. But a locked door would have gone a long way.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    And maybe the most viral BBC commentarying in next to forever. A cool thing.

    And also too. A guy working from a home office with little kids around is not the Embodiment of Patriarchal Subjugation of Wimmin. There are about eleventy hunnert other better examples of that.

    • Thiazin red

      The interview with the terrified rando who was there by mistake and was trying to fake being an expert was pretty good.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    He’s a bit of a po-faced ole starchy, and it would have been nice to see him laugh, or take the kid on his lap, or something. I’m not sure it says much else about much else or the state of the patriarchy or what. My dad would have laughed.

  • Persistent Demme

    So. Damn. Funny!
    (The baby in the walker, moving at lightening speed, sent me over the edge.)

  • Nounverb911
  • M.E. Lawrence

    Silly twit. A half-way intelligent pundit-dude would have scooped up that kid, hugged her, provided crayons and paper (that he keeps on his desk for these occasions), and won popularity points for being a hands-on dad.

    • Virginia O’Possum

      Indeed. When confronted by one’s own children, resourcefulness and a sense of humor score bigly.

  • Panika MCD

    is it really that hard to remember to mute all the instrument inputs before changing out bands?!

  • snark-lurker

    Guys! A new werd!: “discumbooberated”
    THX, Robyn!

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      I am an old, and I ask myself which of those I recall earliest in life, and…can’t make up my mind. Might be a regional thing, but both are definitely old.

  • Hanaka

    Watching over and over and over again and getting that satisfying deep belly chuckle each and every time.

  • Nounverb911
  • TJ Barke

    https://thinkprogress.org/sean-hannity-russia-hacking-cia-false-flag-f2ed7227e8ac#.wklz9f7i0
    Way to go, slappy, you’ve come to the exact conclusion the russians running wikileaks want you to.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Go away kid, you bother me.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPhMDIVapyg

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      Kids & dogs, man, kids & dogs…

  • bopeep

    I have to disagree on this one. I’ve known men like this–and yes, they’ve all been men; that doesn’t mean there might not be some women. He acts and looks like a real jerk. He can’t even look at or smile at his children and he pushes the girl away in a really cruel manner. The mother (or perhaps nanny?) looks absolutely terrified of him. I can’t shake the feeling someone got a beating after this video.

    • Serai 1

      He’s AT WORK. You know, the place/time when you’re supposed to be serious and focused and dealing with WORK THINGS?

      • Thiazin red

        He is also clearly trying to keep from laughing while discussing serious things.

        • doktorzoom

          Babies are no respecters of a serious discussion of VX nerve agent.

          • House0fTheBlueLights

            He was probably wondering if a little VX would really be considered child abuse at that point.

    • emberglance

      My God! He’s on the effin’ NEWS! LIVE! You sure you’d be totes chill with stopping the interview to do some childcare? I’d be freaking out.

    • doktorzoom

      I don’t think she looks terrified of him; I think she’s mortified of the embarrassing situation: “Whooo boy, the kids are on the BBC and, oh, shit, so am I. Great.”

  • Suse

    I’m going to post this a few more times today so more people see it. This is a huge big deal, so please let your friends know. Also, too, contact your reps. One step closer to Orwell’s nightmare. https://www.statnews.com/2017/03/10/workplace-wellness-genetic-testing/

    • Miles Monroe

      Gattaca, only without the good stuff like spaceships …

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
    • Rick Hill

      I knew it was going to be the DNA thing. I wonder if they realize they start restricting their workpool even further till all that’s left is the cast of dead breitbart working for you.

      • Gosala

        They’re trying to reduce costs: insurance, lost time, injuries, etc.

        What it amounts to is neo-eugenics. We won’t kill you outright if you’re inferior. We’ll just let you starve to death.

        • Rick Hill

          They need someone to fill those prison beds. Anyway, the labor market will get quite small once you eliminate anyone who might get something as they age.

          • Gosala

            Jim Crow: not just for niggers no mo’

    • Gosala

      Thank you, Suse. This is a huge deal. I’ve posted the info to my local Indivisible groups. I will be calling my rep. on Monday.

    • Jack Tenhet

      “What this bill would do is completely take away the protections of
      existing laws,” said Jennifer Mathis, director of policy and legal
      advocacy at the Bazelon Center for Mental Health Law, a civil rights
      group. In particular, privacy and other protections for genetic and
      health information in GINA and the 1990 Americans with Disabilities Act
      “would be pretty much eviscerated,” she said.

      She’s not wrong. Funny how the ACA’s smoking cessation programs were called “tyranny” by the wingnuts but this isn’t even going to cause them to bristle in private. Forget that inbreeding causes genetic defects.

    • calliecallie

      “A little-noticed bill moving through Congress would allow companies to require employees to undergo genetic testing or risk paying a penalty of thousands of dollars, and would let employers see that genetic and other health information.”

      That is horrifying! On so many levels.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      There’s no idea too terrible for the GOP to not endorse.

  • Vincent Ricola

    LOL. My dog does that while I’m on Skype calls all the time. I go from classy and neat office setting to a huge boxer banging his way through the closed door and exposing whatever gigantic pile of laundry and diet coke cans that I tried to hide in the hallway.

    Luckily my work people love it and laugh, so I don’t need to shove my dog aside like some kind of uncaring abusive asshole who takes themselves way too seriously.

    • Nounverb911
    • Serai 1

      *eyeroll* Jesus fucking Christ.

      • Vincent Ricola

        What? I’m an asshole because of something? Or just eyeroll worthy? I like to grow as a person, so feedback is appreciated.

        • Little Lulu Ω

          Nah, you’re good.

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Your interpretation of the video doesn’t make you an asshole or eyeroll worthy. People look at things differently. Some people see this as a big nothing, other people don’t agree. I appreciate your thoughts, and don’t feel the need to put them down!

          • Vincent Ricola

            Thank you. I obviously see it differently than most and, in fairness, have had quite a bit of exposure to abused children, so it’s quite possible I am more sensitive to a “harmless push because mommy/daddy is busy right now” than others.

            I probably should disappear until this thread goes much more off-topic.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            I thought that was a total dick move from the dad, and honestly, the mom crawling raised some questions as well. The high speed babby was funny IMHO

          • Resistance Fighter Astraea

            She probably just thought she was out of view of the camera.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            Good point, that makes it funnier :-)

          • Vincent Ricola

            That’s what made me laugh. Babies in those circle walkers can’t be stopped.

            But yeah, I don’t really see this in a feminist perspective, though I understand, I see this more as a parent that should’ve locked the door if they were going to be on a serious tv segment and then instinctively pushed their kid out of the way when the situation became out of control.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Not one person commenting on this was there. They don’t know the people involved. All of it is opinion and conjecture, and we know that people’s various life experiences color the way they see things, and groups of people are never going to see every situation exaclty the same way. Some people confuse their opinions with facts, or don’t really even have an opinion, but enjoy putting other people’s down. Your opinion is worth as much as anyone else’s. Don’t disappear because some people can’t handle that!

        • Up In Smoke O’hontas

          Boxers are uniquely suited to not be taken seriously.. always graceful and never walk in chewing on something found in the garbage ;-)
          I had a boxer as a kid, he was notorious for knocking over children, tripping horses and dragging tampons out of the trash. Pure class!

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          That was rather a WTF remark – pay it no mind.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    As a Cisginger man I am not sure if snark is allowed and since this is more dangerous territory than an IED infested area in Raqqa I will withhold of posts until a feminist deems it safe.

    • Annie Towne

      Deems.

    • Nounverb911

      Snarks allowed, comments not so much.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      What say you, other vagina havers? Shall we allow this one to speak, or are we not amusable?

      • Panika MCD

        the implication that we don’t have a sense of humor makes me think: no. no humor on a humor site for the humorless.

      • Rick Hill

        Don’t you need to have someone who is funny, first?

        • Up In Smoke O’hontas

          Good point.

      • Maree Martin

        The correct term is “vagina enabled”

        • Up In Smoke O’hontas

          I think mine needs a new starter.

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            Get it from NAPA. Factory-spec at like a quarter the price.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Will you blow smoke O’hontas from said vagina?

    • snark-lurker

      donut start…!…

  • Come here a minute

    He did have some good points about Korea!

    (I did not hear anything he said about Korea.)

    • Beanz&Berryz

      I didn’t know they had corian countertops in U.K.

      • BearDeLaOursistance

        Actually, they’re Corinthian.

  • Rick Hill

    “…at best — a douche and at worst a TERRIBLE PARENT”

    Actually, isn’t he British? Which kind of covers that.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Thanx for the LOL

      • Lord Jim

        Good to hear from you again. I was worried about you.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Thank you Jim. It got worse for awhile, but life is much better now, and I see many positives for the future again. :)

          • Lord Jim

            Smashing, old girl. :P Seriously, good news in the current climate of apocalyptic anxiety is always welcome.

    • emberglance

      As a Britisher… yes.

    • emberglance

      although his American accent leads me to believe he is in fact American.

      • Rick Hill

        ‘m not going to let facts get in the way of making a joke

  • Rick Hill

    “..because women are doing the behind the scenes work needed to make that feasible.”

    I thought it was because women were too busy slutting it up and didn’t take their slut pills because women don’t remember important things so they had to take care of their tickets to half a man’s wages.

    (Did I do the mra take on this well, or do I need more saliva and less of a point?)

    • Panika MCD

      you forgot that slut pills are aspirins held between the knees. the bottle next to my toilet is empty. sorry.

      • Rick Hill

        I thought it needed more comments on castrating but I just can’t get that riff going. Guess I need to turn my “going my own way’ card in.

  • FZsdaughter

    Seriously, people? Take the baby on his lap while talking about the nuclear threat from North Korea?! Fuck, I hate the ‘new parenting’ even more than the ‘new parents’ and their horrible spawn.

    • Panika MCD

      well, if he’d just let the kids go free range, this wouldn’t be a problem.

    • HazooToo

      Acknowledging that kids exist and will do annoying stuff to be involved in your life isn’t really new. And it would possibly have kept kid quiet until someone else came to get em.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        This. What he did was ineffective, and if he’s spent any caregiving time with his kids he should know that. Stiffarming an attention-seeking toddler works about as well as telling a cat you’ll feed it when it’s good and ready.

    • Serai 1

      I agree. WTF, do people seriously expect this guy to just stop in the middle of serious policy discussion to chuck his manic kid under the chin? FFS, he’s AT WORK.

  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    I just bathed my 2 dogs. Most of the time this goes very well. Today was not that day. They both bolted and had to be chased down and wrestled back into the bathroom like little wet, soapy pigs, while I yelled and skidded around like the floor was a Slip and Slide. The bathroom floor is covered in water. I am soaked. They hate me right this minute, and are looking at me as though I have betrayed them. Now I have an even bigger mess to clean up than the smelly dogs ever were. Sometimes shit just gets out of hand and no one knows exactly what to do.

    • Thiazin red

      My old rottweiller was the worst about getting a bath, but the ungrateful idiot would be so happy to be cool on a hot day afterwards. She could never seem to make the connection between bath and cool.

      • Jack Tenhet

        Our Lab hated baths too, but only if a tub was involved. We could take him to the lake, he’d jump right in the water, then we’d soap him up and wash him off without a problem. The tub was a different story. He was an odd dog.

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          I’ve known labs like that. For some weird reason warm tub water is anathaema to them, but if they think there’s a lake nearby they’ll be wet to the eyebrows even if there’s still ice floating in it.

          • Jack Tenhet

            You got it, Ron! We even tried cold tap water and he was still panicky and kept trying to get out if we both didn’t hold him in place. I still love that guy.

    • snark-lurker

      I recommend a long, stern scoul.

    • Rick Hill

      Soapy, wet Ms. MLG wrastlin’ around on the bathroom floor? Sounds interesting…go on….

      • snark-lurker

        yes indeed…had not thought of that…and surely: no…pants!

        • Jonny On Maui

          DOWN! Both of you!

          • snark-lurker

            Unpossible to let that one get away.

    • TJ Barke

      On the other hand, you’re on Maui.

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        We will dry quickly!

    • janecita

      Pics of the doggies, or it didn’t happen!

    • BadKitty904

      Rather like the current Presidential Administration and Congress.

    • wide_stance_hubby

      And the toweling! It’s torture until dog realizes just how good it feels and then it’s oh no don’t stop.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      As long as you have the dog strapped to the roof anyway, Mitt recommends,

      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7b0182fc2ced33aecf5d2f54d95230b767b959190eb4fcd8f2b3f2c80b88c6e4.jpg

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      I know exactly what to do: close the bathroom door. ;-)

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        Gee. I never thought of THAT!

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      My mom just takes their little Spanish Terrier, drops her in the shower, lets her race around in there getting clean, then lets her race around the house drying off. Mainly because anything else involves trying to chase her around and she’s a fast lil’ bugger.

    • Blackest Noobs

      you shouldve called the WOLF.

      https://youtu.be/zVBCrX-X3c8?t=2m4s

    • doktorzoom

      OK, but next week, try the same thing while explaining current tensions on the Korean Peninsula.

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        I was! They don’t even CARE! Can you believe that?

        • Rick Hill

          Pfft. Low information voters and dawgs…what ya gonna do?

        • Hardly Ideal

          You guys are precious!

    • Shibusa
    • Jonny On Maui

      Well, after their bath they came down to visit me where I was working and they found something nice and smelly to romp in…

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        What a waste of time. They’ll smell like dirt, the compost heap and my wasted energy again any minute now!

  • emberglance

    No way on earth this is the wife. The wife will be drinking Chardonnay in the kitchen or in bed with an attack of the nerves. Surely this poor woman is the nanny. I really hope he didn’t give her any shit afterwards.

    • HazooToo

      If a nanny grabbed my son the way she grabbed that girl, she would absolutely be getting some shit. Then again, I think it was the wife, coz the little girl looked more like her.

    • Niblet58

      No way would his wife almost crawl in to get the kids. That lady was the nanny.

      • Courser_Resistance

        I thought it was a Tom Cruise Risky Business sock slide! Pretty athletic, I thought!

      • emberglance

        Right, the wife would saunter in, take in the scene with a sardonically raised eyebrow and saunter out again.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      She looked North Korean to me… OMG!! Where did she take the kids???

      • janecita

        She ate them!

    • Panika MCD

      you can’t see the kitchen in the video. it’s not like they’re installed in vagina havers after the babby comes out.

  • JeffWest

    A few minutes before airtime, give each kid a shot of Botox in the ankles. Ask your wife where it is.

  • Maree Martin

    A friend of mine is a TV news anchor. Her husband frequently has to take care of their children while she goes out on assignment DOING HER JOB. Her husband is a newspaper journalist, and he is often interviewed by news outlets, while his wife watches the children. If the man is giving an interview as a North Korean expert, why is he a horrible sexist and terrible dad, just because he expects his wife to keep the children from interfering while he is DOING HIS JOB????

    • snark-lurker

      careful they bite

    • janecita

      Thank you! I totally agree.

    • Serai 1

      THANK YOU.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Exactly. I thought is was simply an amusing anecdote about living a busy life. No reason to indict anyone over it.

  • Jamoche

    http://io9.gizmodo.com/trump-supporters-get-mad-because-they-think-the-man-in-1793159888
    “Trump Supporters Get Mad Because They Think The Man in the High Castle‘s ‘Resistance Radio’ Is Real”

    Because when you’re talking about how Nazis are bad, obviously you really mean Trump.

    • Paganish

      Obvs, right?

    • ltmcdies

      Just when you think we’ve hit peak stupid… there’sa peak further up

      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        I think this one might be above the tropopause.

        • willi0000000

          couple more “peaks” and they’ll be able to just kick satellites off into geostationary orbit!

  • Sardonicuss

    Pinball babby.

    • BadKitty904

      He’s got to take a whiz;
      Pinball babby,
      All up in Daddy’s biz…

      • Sardonicuss

        He/she..seemed really delighted to be bouncing off the walls.
        Maybe..Babby Pinball.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea

    The woman in the video is his wife. He is a perfesser in Korea and is an American who went to Ohio State University. His wife is a yoga teacher.

    • Persistent Tennessee Rain

      O-H-

      • veska

        I-O

    • Panika MCD

      so he does watch the kids while she’s working.

      • Resistance Fighter Astraea

        I guess they could have a babysitter or something but I don’t see a reason to assume he’s a shitty dad.

        The little girl apparently felt free to dance on into his office.

        • Panika MCD

          he does work from home. that’s pretty cool.

  • Courser_Resistance

    Personally, my favorite part was Mom’s Tom Cruise Risky Business sock slide into the office. Now THAT was hysterical, along with the horrified look on her face. When I was about that little girl’s age THIS was the home I grew up in! Not that Dad was on TV – this was back in the early 60’s, but he’d be having a Serious Conversation on the telephone while WW III played out in the background, my mom trying to do her best to either get us to shut up or move it out of the room.

    Dad was kinda a jerk to the little girl, but he likely had been called up with about 10 minutes to prepare in which he had to get into a suit & tie (Fuck pants! Who needs pants to do a quick Skype thing!), get Skype up and running, and figure out what he was going to say. He was trying *so* hard to concentrate on the subject matter while all Hell breaks loose behind him and finally he giggles a little, probably totally mortified. It goes into the “Shit happens” file as far as I’m concerned. We all our ‘less than stellar’ moments

    • Serai 1

      A jerk would have turned around and snapped at her, or yelled to his wife about getting the kids out. All this guy did was try to push her – GENTLY – away from the camera.

      • Courser_Resistance

        My dad would gently cover my mouth when I got too chatty. It was no big deal and I liked the feel of his hands on my face when I was little. Dad was a gentle guy.

        • Serai 1

          People sometimes have some very strange ideas about what constitutes abusive behavior.

  • laineypc

    Kids absolutely know when you are on The Most Important Phone Call, possibly of your career. They will make sure you understand that there is no Important Phone Call more important than them.

  • Rick Hill

    Another Wonketteer posted this this morning but, since I can’t remember who, it means I did it first. Dedicated to all those trumpanzees who just can’t beleive that donald isn’t actually doing everything as president, working so hard, not taking time off and making great deals. All just for them.
    https://s12.postimg.org/6gsj3aogd/calvin_trump_health.jpg

  • BadKitty904

    Aight, chirren….it’s FRRRIDAY!!1!

    Time to CRANK IT ON UP!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qgRs5BWM_I

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    I was a bit uncomfortable watching the older child being dragged by her arm like that.

    • BadKitty904

      I’m guessing she didn’t have time for the dart-gun and net.

      • weejee

        Or duct tape.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      One of the ways kids that age work on understanding the world is by acting as little skinner boxes for their parents, who are (in a perfect world) the people they trust most, and thus the safest for them to challenge. So for a few years the whole thing is a PERFECTLY NORMAL AND HEALTHY comedy routine where they systematically go looking for your last good sleep-deprived nerve like little scientists and stomp on it to see what happens.

      I have no doubt in the world that the eldest child was told not to open the door to daddy’s office and did it anyway as soon as mom’s back was turned. Once that happened, the only way she was going to be out of there on short notice without more shenanigans was if she was physically removed. Because kid. Which is why you don’t trust them not to open that door if they’re capable of it. Not because they’re bad, because kid.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        This. Halelujah. Safe attachment. Last week my son pushed away my arm telling me he wasn’t interested in talking to me. After feeling a little but hurt I felt glad He felt safe enough to act like a little dick towards me.

      • One of my sisters once remarked that “Mom used to tell me “someday I hope you have children of your own” when I was being a particularly obnoxious little shit. I now realize she was cursing me.”

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Mine came out and called it the mother’s curse.

      • Courser_Resistance

        Exactly. This comedy could have happened when I was that little girl’s age but with telephone not TV. We had many, many scenes like that with Very Important Phone Calls accompanied by screaming children.

        Yup, that’s Real Family Life right there.

      • suz

        I will bet you 5 American dollars that Mommy was on the potty, when suddenly the little fingers wiggling at her from under the door disappeared.

        • Carpe Vagenda

          You know, funny you should say that, because I showed the beleaguered husband that video this morning and the first thing he said was that mom was probably in the bathroom.

          • suz

            Yep. She probably thought the office door was locked and she’d get 2 minutes of peace.

          • Carpe Vagenda

            I still distinctly remember – and mine is graduating from college in a couple of months – how thrilled I was when I started freelancing again and got to have unsupervised bathroom visits.

      • eka

        i forget where i first saw this story, but apparently the grandparents said that they skype with the kids in that room and probably she thought it was them when she heard voices. I guess he knows to lock the door now, huh?

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Hopefully the happy ending is now that he’s a viral celebrity and Korea is still doing interesting things, he’ll get more calls.

    • suz

      If that was harmful, we’d all be walking around disabled.

  • Sardonicuss

    To the end of Black Sabbath. Who I saw on their farewell tour…in 1979?
    https://youtu.be/QdD1yrOCwnY

  • Shanzgood

    Texted teen daughter just now to see if she wants anything from the pharmacy. She wants more of “that face wash that smells like porta potty”.

    Ooookayyy

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      Eau du Sani-Hut?

    • BadKitty904

      I luv Teen Daughter.

      • Shanzgood

        She’s a card. This is the one who, sitting with me in my first new car in 10 years, said “Mom, we have to keep it this clean ALWAYS!”

        “Right!” says me. “No eating or drinking or smoking. Don’t even FART in here!”

        She smiles slyly and whispers “Too late!

    • Panika MCD
      • Shanzgood

        Aaaahahaha! I love those two!!!

    • Nockular cavity

      I, myself, would like less of that, please.

    • Beanz&Berryz

      LOL!!!

      The fresh porta or the not fresh one??

      • Shanzgood

        Definitely fresh! I have spent enough years on construction sites to know the difference!

        • Beanz&Berryz

          The fresh scent of the, piss biscuits, as I once heard them called?

          • Shanzgood

            The blue water isn’t that bad. Not on the first day, anyway.

            I was downwind one insanely hot July day when the suck trucks came to clear them all out. I had to run, gagging, until I got away from the bank of half a dozen porta potties. It was worse than being IN one. I do not miss that part of the job.

          • Beanz&Berryz

            Those trucks are the worst.

          • Shanzgood

            Just grateful that’s not my job.

          • Beanz&Berryz

            And. Appreciating those guys who do that job.

    • janecita

      Neutrogena? Because I swear to God, that face wash smells awful.

      • Shanzgood

        No. I think it’s something I usually get at the grocery store for her. Just a funny description from her!

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Reason #4,327 I love minor league baseball.
    https://twitter.com/erie_seawolves/status/840314568333283329

    • Martini Ambassador

      Don’t look it up or anything, but I hold the world record for most home runs in a single game. All the games, actually.

    • LucindathePook

      Went to two Sea Wolves games, one Grateful Dead Day and one Jimmy Buffett Day. Also to Presque Isle–great days.

  • Nockular cavity

    Now I’m looking over my mole recipes, and wondering how they can be female or male, never mind feminist.

    • veska

      I never understood moles. Probably why I failed chemistry.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        It’s easy. The number of mashed avogadros determines how many guacamoles you have.

        • Nockular cavity

          I wuz gonna write something witty, but that was better.

        • LucindathePook

          6.02x 10^23

          • Carpe Vagenda

            The actual cheerleading chant from my bull-nerd high school contained “secant, tangent, cosine, sine, 3.14159”

  • BIJ0U

    YOU GUYS. That wasn’t the mom. That was an amah. Good grief. She’s probably been fired.

    • janecita

      I would have, she obviously wasn’t doing her job.

      • suz

        Ah. Illusion of perfection, destroyed yet again. A disgrace to our gender.

        • janecita

          Dude, if you are the nanny,regardless of you gender, and your job is to take care of the kids, take care of the fucking kids!!!!

          • suz

            Dude, it wasn’t the nanny. :)

    • Carpe Vagenda

      No, actually, I’m not sure what cues you guys are picking up on, but it was the mom

      • Courser_Resistance

        Thank you. No need to get hysterical here. More ‘South Korea’s Funniest Videos’ than anything else.

      • BIJ0U

        You’re right. Thanks for the correction. My bad.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      It took me 5 minutes to find his website.

      Seriously, it’s not hard to avoid making assumptions here.

  • Suse

    We had to say goodbye to our 17 year old kitty, Reddy, today. 💔 😿 https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/181a5341e4699cde50cbd39ecac5eb0144af0a396e3901d76e6a9bbfda0fa911.jpg

    • veska

      I’m so sorry. ::hugz::

      • Suse

        Thank you.

    • jowgajen

      Beautiful kitty. So sorry for your loss.

      • Suse

        Thanks.

    • proudgrampa

      I’m so sorry. I hope you have lots of happy memories…

      • Suse

        Thanks. He was no longer having fun.

        • Sardonicuss

          I lost my 17 year old kitteh last year too. He got the diabeetus and was no longer having fun either.
          …..but he was very entertaining when he was!
          He one befriended a possum (because there wasn’t any thing else around to hang out with).
          The possum didn’t know the cat was his friend, and was pretty annoyed about him following him around all the time…..but cat didn’t care.

          • Courser_Resistance

            Kitty don’t give no fucks if best friend is a very weird, ugly cat.

          • Sardonicuss

            That same cat also got cozy with an armadillo family. Mama and 3 little dillo’s. Cat would follow them around and tap them on their shell to annoy them and they would ignore him…..which frustrated him. He would fall on his back and bat them and they would just shuffle off in the other direction. He was just tryin to be friendly!

        • BadKitty904

          He’s gone on ahead, to find the sunny, warm spots for you. :0)

    • Panika MCD
      • Suse

        Looks just like him when he was a babby.

        • Panika MCD

          oh. sorry times a million.

    • janecita

      I’m s sorry. How are you doing?

      • Suse

        I’m okay, but worrying about his brother and how he will take it.

    • TJ Barke
    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I’m so sorry. It’s so hard to lose them.

    • weejee

      Big hug. Too sad.

    • Bill D. Burger

      “When tomorrow starts without me
      Don’t ever think we’re far apart.
      For every time you think of me,
      I’m right there, inside your heart.”

      http://condolencemessages.info/wp-content/uploads/cat-loss-sympathy-messages.jpg

      • Suse

        This made me cry, but in a good, releasing kind of way! I’ve been weirldly stoic today. Thanks.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Aw, I’m sorry. Pretty kitty cat.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      ~hugs~ I’m sorry. I’ve lost beloved pet cats myself.

    • BadKitty904

      Oh, Suze, I’m so dreadfully sorry to hear of your loss.

      I’m sure you gave Reddy a long, love-filled life, and as long as you remember him, you’ll hear an answering purr in your heart.

    • A virtual tear in solidarity with you, Suse.

      xo

    • Courser_Resistance

      Oh I’m so sorry! Pretty kitty. I’ve lost fur friends and it sucks.

    • Nockular cavity

      So sorry!

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      Oh, Suse, what a lovely, sweet, beautiful cat. I’m so sorry. It’s heartbreaking when they leave us, and you can’t believe how much you weep. They are such kind little creatures and we protect them, so it feels existentially sad. But you must remember what a lovely, warm, sunny, loved, cuddly, purry life you gave her, and also that you gave her the kindest gift of all at the end, helping her have a peaceful passage, no matter how hard it was for you. That is your final gift to her (or him) and I hope you can take some peace from knowing how loving it was. Soon you will be able to remember her without tears.

    • emberglance

      Sorry

    • BrianW

      So sorry to hear it. Depending on your human family, I sometimes think it’s harder to lose pets than humans.

      • proudgrampa

        It is harder. Much harder than losing family.

    • mancityRed6

      Pippa is 15 this year. I just don’t want to.
      Brady was in ’11. I let her lay in the grass outside one last time while I drank whiskey and cried.
      https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5877958439fb79bc1aece867503768e9eb1af0b351a82d2a2a3203a7b8963790.jpg

      • Suse

        Aww, how sweet.

        • mancityRed6

          she was and I am so very sorry for your loss

    • Miles Monroe

      For a remorseless apex predator, they sure can get under our skin …

      Just remember you made at least as much of a difference in his life as he did in yours.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        My last girlfriend had pets, and my favorite was this white cat, Boo-Boo. He would shed clouds of white fur if you looked at him sideways, but he had been separated from his mommie at too early a stage and would cuddle all day, grasping me with one claw to keep me near. Ima sucker for cats, and I’d cuddle him for hours.

        Ex-GF dumped me a year ago when my Mom’s health problems got really bad, but I miss Boo-Boo *way* more than I miss her. :)

        • Miles Monroe

          Think they pretty much all shed clouds of fur; the white stuff is just more noticeable … ?

          Ours demands naptime, every day!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            XD Nice!

            Yes, Boo-Boo’s fur was a bitch to get off my clothes. Once, I wouldn’t cuddle cos GF and I were in rave gear to go clubbing, but he got over his mad when we got back and I called him over.

      • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

        Several of the cats I’ve had got under my skin by digging straight through…

    • Painter of Swedish Tragedies

      So sorry to hear about your little friend. *hugs*

    • Rick Hill

      This, for your Reddy. Sort of the Tibetan version of happiness(somewhat like the Chinese version, I’d imagine) An ethereal blend of sweetness and longing at once: Happiness is…
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uu8zT95O-H0

      • Suse

        Very nice – thanks.

        • Rick Hill

          De nada, Suse.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        That was a cheery little parable.

        • Rick Hill

          I have this song on my random play, didn’t realize until I looked it up that it was in the movie Hero. This was a bit of sadness in that scene.

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      What a handsome fella! So sorry for your loss :(

    • Shoto

      So sorry to hear about little Reddy. Condolences.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Aw. I’m sorry, Suse.

    • LucindathePook

      Beautiful, sweet kitty. Condolences.

    • seaofgreen

      Sympathy for your very pretty Reddy passing over. The first week is the hardest, so be kind to yourself.

  • Amelia

    Yeeeeah, I don’t think this is any actual comment on his parenting or level of feminism. He’s working. Maybe he should have locked the door, whatever, but you could tell he even thought it was a little funny.

    I know it’s instinctual to assume the white guy in a suit is being an asshole, and 90% of the time they are, but I think we can just enjoy the kid in the walker and the super frantic lady yanking them back out the door.

    Signed, person who has worked both around small children and from home, and would hate to combine those things.

    • Mack N. Nietzsche

      Yeah, I think we might be knee jerking her. For all we know, he went out into the hall afterwards, scooped up his daughter and hugged her.

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      100%. And it would probably have been the same way if it was the wife who was broadcasting, with the dad racing in to try to salvage the situation.

    • mancityRed6

      if that was where my computer was, you bet I’d know how to lock the door.
      wait…oh, crap

  • Pongo

    Dude could have taken himself a little less seriously, but OTOH, it was live TV and who knows how any of us would respond.

    Hope mom/nanny/kids didn’t get into too much trouble. This guy should thank them. The kiddie snafu got him more air time than he could possibly have dreamed of.

  • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

    I thought it was HILARIOUS! So British. He’s trying to keep his composure–the baby speedwalking was the funniest part–and the poor mom ‘OH SHIT” but HE KEEPS GOING, it’s SO British, and still can’t stop himself from cracking a smile.

  • Nounverb911

    So the Secret Service isn’t in charge of the oval office any more?
    https://twitter.com/juliehdavis/status/840264193605545985

    • Bill D. Burger

      Trump security to American Press: “Gehorsam macht dich frei.”

      • Gosala

        Dutzen Sie mich nicht! Ich kenne Sie nicht, mein Herr.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      The Secret Service can’t be forced to sign a private confidentiality agreement

    • Painter of Swedish Tragedies

      The OOO. Somehow that seems about right.

      • OneYieldRegular

        It’s like something out of Our Man Flint.

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      Was reading about this during the campaign. It’s causing all kinds of issues with Secret Service. Will his hired muscle take a bullet for him? If he keeps treating the Secret Service like crap, they might not take it either.

  • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

    I love this poor man, who is–as others have speculated–probably in jammy pants from the waist down, and has also been told where to sit in relation to the camera, hence doesn’t dare to move. I love his horrified wife. I love those two tots (especially that bold little girl who despite the worst efforts of the big, bad patriarchy is clearly a completely, joyfully confident, affirmed, adorable little pain in the ass). I love the fact that if Donald doesn’t somehow manage to blow us all to smithereens, this family is going to embrace this story as part of its core narrative for the next fifty years and longer. “That time Daddy was on the BBC….”

    I hate people who have time to read their own angst into every fucking moment that has flickered past since the world began.

    • disqus_lWwzrwNaw6

      PS, Since I read my own angst about Donald blowing up the world into this flickering moment, I guess I hate myself too. But I still love this whole crazy little family.

  • janecita

    Is the so called president, going to Florida this weekend?

    • Nounverb911

      Nope, probably just a burnt steak at his no-tell hotel.

    • Panika MCD

      probably. Melania had the locks changed.

    • MeerkatsRMammals

      I’d hope he’d stay in DC this weekend as every other news organization reported last week that he’s costing taxpayers a cool $1 million per weekend.

  • Nounverb911

    Just pick one donnie! Donnie seems to be reporting to Bannon, Putin AND Hannity now.
    https://twitter.com/nytimes/status/840324656397729794

    • janecita

      Wtf??.

  • mancityRed6

    “HUSBAND. PUT THE BABY DOWN AND MIX ME A BEVERAGE.”
    AND MAKE IT SNAPPY!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I’ll pretend to be your husband, and I’ll make it!
      And then I’ll drink it ‘cuz you can’t get me. Nyah, nyah.

      • mancityRed6

        *snaps fingers*
        you better get that fine ass in here on the double
        and make it a double!

        • alpacapunchbowl

          And save yourself the trouble

        • Lance Thrustwell

          {eyes widen} How did you know I had a fine… {mutters} boy, those CIA stories are on to sumthin’.

  • MeerkatsRMammals

    Funniest bit in the video is the extreme babby racer in the walker! Once they figure those things out, they’re hell on wheels ;)

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I felt much better about my ineptness as a new parent when I found out that my brother-in-law, the first of seven for parents who each were one of seven, somehow managed to fall downstairs in his walker holding a pair of sewing scissors.

      • MeerkatsRMammals

        Babbys shouldn’t be sewing!

      • Courser_Resistance

        You know, I was just going to say that my baby bro took a trip down the basement stairs in one of those.

        So HELL YES! They are hell on wheels in those things!

        • Carpe Vagenda

          Mine took a dive off the basement stairs head first onto concrete because I made sure my mom’s basement was babyproofed, but I didn’t realize you have to have a gate on the bottom of the stairs too.

  • My dad had the dubious distinction of being a passenger in Hap Harper’s plane doing the San Francisco traffic for KNBR am radio back in the late 60’s early 70’s.

    We all got up early to listen to the traffic report that day as Hap was a family friend and promised us he’d chat dad up on the radio for us to hear him.

    Every time Hap got the chance on air he’d ask dad a question and all you could hear was the sound of dad throwing up. Hap would laugh out loud and ask another question and dad would barf again. On and on it went.

    I hadn’t thought about this in years.

    • Suse

      I remember Hap with fondness. Is he still with us?

  • Darrell Imaginarian

    I work full time as a children’s entertainer and I am totally comfortable stiff arming a toddler away from me and my stuff. But then, I am a man.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • alpacapunchbowl

        Unfortunately it’s not in my possession so I can’t share, but there is a joke photo we took of me (a wimmenz) holding my 6mo nephew upside down while preparing dinner. And I might add, the kid loved it.

        • Bill D. Burger

          W.C. Fields’ movie personna hated kids:
          Interviewer: “Oh..Mr. Fields. Do you like children?”
          Fields: “Love em’….baked, boiled or fried.”

          But, in reality he had two sons, whom, reportedly, he loved and doted on incessantly.

        • Courser_Resistance

          Not surprised at all. Kids love that kind of gymnastics shit.

      • snark-lurker

        “All things considered, I’d rather be [living] in Pittsburg.”

        –WC on his own eppitaff

      • puredog

        “I’d say this one takes a mashie niblick; what do you think, caddie?”

      • Mr. Blobfish

        Is that Baby Leroy or photoshopped?

        • Bill D. Burger

          It’s Baby Leroy

  • UnsaltedSinner
    • jowgajen

      I’ve decided his wife is wearing those sneakers with the roller skate on the back.

      • alpacapunchbowl

        They make those in adult sizes?? It’s annoying as hell to dodge kids zipping around on those things while their parents ignore that they are knocking shit over left and right, but damn if I don’t want a pair.

        • sw19bunnies
          • alpacapunchbowl

            The American flag ones are calling to me, but the 80s kid in me also likes the ones that are basically knock-off Vans. I love it that Vans are back.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Oh come now. I thought the funniest part was when we’d find out that the “wife” was actually an illegal North Korean au pair.

  • cheetojeebus

    o/t seen today in the wild: Black escalade with huge “Freedom” back window skin decal and various trump stickers. The dude driving, about 70. Spray tan. knit shirt with huge gold chain and pendant hanging on the outside. Wearing a black mink man fur short jacket. The mom jeans sealed the deal. a loud wtf escaped my lips unconsciously as I watched him walk to his car.

    • mancityRed6

      you have so much more self restraint than I do.
      good for you.

    • Gosala

      Funny, I’m thinking pimp.

      Why would that be?

      • cheetojeebus

        More retired philly wiseguy actually.

        • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

          Remind anyone else of Ray Donavan’s dad?

          • cheetojeebus

            Exactly, even the fucking hair! I saw Ray Donovan’s dad!

    • snark-lurker

      i must be goin insane tonight

    • Courser_Resistance

      Jeebus, the crazy pills must be kicking in early…

  • suz

    You know it’s his wife, and not a nanny, by the way she came freaking skidding through that door. That’s a mom super-power. I hope they laugh about this for years.

    • under_score

      Also, too, desperate lunge to shut the door while on her knees and with chaos behind her. Solidarity.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        That lunge took this video from funny viral video into the stratosphere of YouTube All Stars imo.

        • House0fTheBlueLights

          You just know she is holding those children at bay with her feet at that moment.

  • Resistance Fighter Astraea
    • alpacapunchbowl

      Oh my gosh, what a poindexter, that’s hilarious.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    I don’t think he was being a total jerk, but he would have seemed a lot cooler if he’d just swooped the kid up on his lap and calmly kept talking. I’d like to think I’d have had that kind of presence of mind.

    • Scrofula

      Yeah, but first time selling a book/yourself to the big posh BBC dude?
      Although I do think he was trying to be sly with the straight-arm.

    • Meanie-meanie, tickle a person

      That assumes he *could* have continued the interview with a possibly out-of-control tinyperson a-lap. Might have ended the whole thing right there…

      • Lance Thrustwell

        True, true. They are a wee bit unpredictable!

    • sw19bunnies

      Given that I am completely a single-track/non-multitasking person, I totally got the guy trying to work out WTF to do, live on TV. Plus all the flummoxing afterwards as his train of thought had been nuked from orbit.
      Yeah sure he could have swept the munchkin up, but then it might have disintegrated into tragedy.
      Kudos, kindred spirit!

  • Anna Elizabeth

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xn_hRh8AGNk&index=11&list=PLgA_QpnjZQyy-jwORBJvUPBNj4_qJu2qE

    I haven’t yet had time to pursue my goal of learning to Ballroom dance, *but* I know where the place is now, and it’s a short bus ride from my new apartment, so the goal is in sight. :)

    • snark-lurker

      yoo go gurl!!!

    • UnsaltedSinner

      Be careful. I’m told it can get rough.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbcBnYc8GlE

      • Anna Elizabeth

        XD Watch the Sophie video – she cheats and sabotages her way thru the contest!

        • UnsaltedSinner

          Yeah, I sense a trend here. Violent places, these dance halls.

    • Gosala

      Just so what the instructor says, and you’ll be fine.

      https://youtu.be/pwm7woPsvt8

  • veska

    LOL, people are leaving fake reviews for Trump businesses:

    http://finance.yahoo.com/news/trump-hotels-getting-hammered-horrible-184639067.html

  • Rick Hill

    I doan know why you wimminzes ain’t more happy to have us men folks around….

    https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/a8yG0w1_460s.jpg

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Can confirm. DR bounces.

    Also I have watched this like 20 times today.

  • cheetojeebus

    I love how the little girl knocked over all his neatly piled books. also too notice the little girl falls as she is being pulled out of the room and mom just drags her out between the walker and the door frame on her belly.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    The thing that bothered me about this video was not the dad shoving the kid back with his arm, because that seemed perfectly fine in the circumstances, it was literally everyone except My Wonkette assuming that the Asian woman must be the nanny bc Asian wife WUT?

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      It bothers me that people couldn’t take a few minutes to look it up on the internets instead of wildly guessing or assuming.

    • HazooToo

      The kid looks more like her than like Dad.

  • Courser_Resistance

    I figured out something years ago. This shit, in one form or another, happens to *everyone* over the course of our lives, in big and small ways. If you have kids, you can be almost guaranteed that one of them will say something shocking in the presence of Important People, however you define that. If it doesn’t happen to you at work, it may happen to you at church or some other social gathering of consequence when you really want to come off well. But no matter what happens, how you react to it makes the difference between an amusing anecdote and a crisis. I’m a huge clutz, so I trip, stumble, etc on the regular. There’s nothing wrong with me, it just is. If it’s noticed, or I jostle someone I’ll apologize with a smile and a quip, like, “My middle name sure isn’t ‘Grace'”. Adults don’t dwell on that shit and if they do, it’s their problem.

    • mancityRed6

      my dad taught me to wolf whistle.
      I would do it in public places. Of course that didn’t come from that five year old kid, it must have come from the dad. The nerve of him.
      Regrets, he has a few.

    • shaar dula

      yup. this happens all the time at my work place atleast.

    • Susan Szews

      Or if one works at home and has dogs. And forgets to put the conference call on mute. Or has to say something on a conference call and the Dog Is Yapping.

      I loved the mom in the video who came tearing in the door frantically trying to stay out of frame.

      • veska

        I remember one time my mom was on A Important phone call. And our dog wouldn’t stop playing with his toy. The real hilarious part was that it didn’t squeak, it was a soccer ref that yelled “Goooooaaaaaallll”. Man did Comet love that thing.

        • Courser_Resistance

          God, that reminds me of my former boyfriend was on a Very Important Call and his dog had a toy he adored and had lost. He rediscovered it was joyously squeaking and talking to it. It sounded very strange. Could be construed as kinda sexxxy-times-ish cuz dawg sort of groaned into the toy.

          I couldn’t remove the dog ‘cuz I was in the hallway literally rolling around on the carpet stifling my laughter.

          • veska

            Oh, I know for a fact why my dog was being obnoxious – he didn’t like being ignored by anyone. And mom was definitely not giving him the attention he deserved.

  • Master Contrail Program

    Every toddler in the neighborhood knows better than https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0ff981deb2c94631455e5cabfdbb7b28183fcc62363116781d1070463c360faa.jpg to step on Alabaster Thunder’s court.

    POSTERIZED!

  • Scrofula

    “Now I’ll never get paid to talk out my ass on TV! You lousy kids!” [weeps into bourbon].

  • BlueMonkey

    this video is perfect. dude will remember to lock the office door next time he goes on the tee vee with no pants.

  • Suse

    Thanks to all for the kitty condolences. You guys are the best!

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Oh no! I’ve been working and negligent in my wonking… I’m so, so sorry! *hugs*

  • veska

    Well, Roger Stone just admitted he had contact with the DNC hacker:

    https://twitter.com/thehill/status/840334469504651264

    • Shibusa

      That hairpiece wouldn’t look any more ridiculous if it came with a chin strap.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        More like a ball gag. Stone was more or less driven out of politics when someone found the ads he took out for someone of enhanced melanin to have sex with his wife while he watched.

        Yes, folks, the projection goes that deep. Their ‘mastermind’ is a card-carrying cuck.

        • Lance Thrustwell

          Wow.

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          Really? That’s an impressive level of projection I did not know existed.

          • Up In Smoke O’hontas

            Underestimate the projection at your peril.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • puredog

        But for the babby vid you might have won the internet today.

      • Carpe Vagenda

        Ziptie the Pinhead. There you go.

    • Paperless Tiger

      Is there anything that he hasn’t admitted to by now?

    • OneYieldRegular

      But seriously, you’re going to let someone with a f*cking tattoo of Nixon’s face on his back help you out on your campaign?

      • Carpe Vagenda

        He was a fellow Roy Cohn protege.

    • Rick Hill

      Knows he won’t be prosecuted, just trying to get some cred with the alt rights.

  • Carpe Vagenda

    Roger Stone is copping to Guccifer now eta: but you knew that.

    https://twitter.com/amjoyshow/status/840339466602594304

    • mancityRed6

      I try to read the stupid in the comments but it just keeps taking me back to the damn story about the guy with a Dick on his back!

    • Thiazin red

      This seems to be the lie they’re going with for all this stuff. “Oh that guy. I totally forgot that I met with him, and don’t remember anything about the conversation, but it was totally not treasonous”

      Did someone ask him why he was meeting with a foreign hacker?

      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        Don’t be silly!

  • Shibusa

    CIA hacked Melania & Donald’s iPad:
    https://media.giphy.com/media/Nf8MRslaEjRpS/giphy.gif

    • Thiazin red

      Long set up, but worth it.

  • Thiazin red

    Man today is the last vampire Diaries, I’m going to miss it. I will miss the rapid plot twists, stupid ass plans, terrible flashback hair, and Ian Somerhalder’s sexy overacting.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I couldn’t get into the show. It just couldn’t live up to my nostagia for the books

      • puredog

        I stuck with it for a long, long time, but finally decided it was going nowhere I needed to be.

    • If you are looking for terrible flashback hair, may i recommend Arrow?

  • Rick Hill

    Feminism…feminism…let’s see what the good book says what should be done with women:
    https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aAdeKvZ_460s.jpg

    • Suse

      Lovely!

      • Rick Hill

        I wonder if this is the bible giving a thumbs up for lesbians?

        • snark-lurker

          i would not recommend that gesture

    • Thiazin red

      Ah traditional marriage, between a soldier and the rape victim whose people he murdered.

      • Rick Hill

        “And the lawd says “Go and slay those who offend thee. Take their beasts and land. Slay their older women and keep the young hotties for yourself because it’s your booty, now.”

  • Suse

    Posting this again so everyone sees it. Please pass it on and protest to your congress critters. Genetic profiling can’t be allowed to happen. https://www.statnews.com/2017/03/10/workplace-wellness-genetic-testing/

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      There are so many things wrong with this, where to start?

      • Gosala

        Start by calling your congress critter and telling them HR1313 is an abomination, an assault on privacy and an attack on the ADA. Tell them you expect them to oppose it. Then tell ask your friends and neighbors.

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          I used that as a script and left a message. Not sure how well he can hear me with my laptop screeching in the background (I need it on for stuff) but hopefully they can piece it together from context.

    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Thanks for posting this. So far beyond the point of fucked up.

    • jaspersdad

      It was just denied in Canada’s House of Commons.

      http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/genetic-testing-bill-vote-wednesday-1.4015863

      “The life and health insurance industry is extremely disappointed that Bill S-201 was passed today in the House of Commons without significant amendment.”

      Ha!

  • HazooToo

    I need to share this with you guys. Start the video at 0:43. I can’t work, I got four bed rats.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btpA9ywjrUE

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Uh oh. Sunset. Trump is now unsupervised.

    • FDRliberal

      ‘When the Jews Are Away, the Goys Will Play’
      read more: http://www.haaretz.com/us-news/1.769667

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZOF9q5fzfs

    • Gosala
    • AJ Milne

      We need a video of Spicy trying to do the presser… And Trump comes roaring in the back door in a baby walker thing…

      • Raan

        Oh God, the Beast in a diaper.

        Well, that soup and grilled cheese was fun while I had it.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      I’ve been thinking about this all day.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Fuck, time for the Shabbat Ragegasm. Batten down the hatches!!!

  • Martini Ambassador

    Charlie Pierce on some American history.
    https://twitter.com/CharlesPPierce/status/840341437321490435

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      We held you off as long as we could. How could we know you’d decide to invade someone else?

    • Gosala

      It was born considerably before that. Not later than 1898, the Spanish American War — Bully!

      • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

        I tend to be unenthusiastic about Teddy. Also white supremacist and exterminationist. Real hero in some “progressive” quarters. Funny, that.

        • Gosala

          Teddy is an ambiguous figure. I’m not a fan of his unabashed imperialism, nor of his hyper machismo.

          Not sure about his racism. He did have Booker T. Washington to signet and room hell for it. But then he absented himself from racial issues ever after.

          Not air what you mean by exterminationism.

          But what I do like about him is that he got the balance between personal responsibility and common interest. He fought against the idea that society owed nothing to its members, against the idea that one’s success or failure in life was entirely sure to one’s own efforts. (Sound familiar? )

          He understood that some things can only accomplished by common effort.

          So. Take it for what it’s worth.

  • Vecchioivan

    At least he didn’t ask her for a sandwich.

  • FDRliberal

    Hilarious video. First, it’s especially funny that all the jubilant ‘toddler chaos’ is happening with the stiff British BBC guy in the foreground. I also love the end of the video, where the mother or caretaker, on her hands and knees, scurries back to close the door,

    https://twitter.com/Phil_Lewis_/status/840176136235683845?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

    • Thiazin red

      I don’t think either parent realizes the range of the camera. Dad is trying to keep Kid 1 out of sight, Mom is trying to stay out of the picture at the end. Both fail at it.

  • Martini Ambassador

    Move along. Nothing to see here…
    Russian oligarch responds to Trump airport connection

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    I’ve heard a lot of people complain (not here, in life) in the last couple of years that nothing “new” is being designed/created anymore, and I would like to say that anyone who thinks that is beyond ignorant. Especially since I keep seeing people reuse words for things that are nothing like those words (my current favorite example is, “modern chandeliers”, which I personally blame on laziness).

    • Jonny On Maui

      The only thing new is the audience.

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        No.

    • sw19bunnies

      “American Democracy”

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        Alright, but a jellyfish chandelier has the lights in a waterfall pattern so clearly that’s still the most egregious example.

  • Jonny On Maui

    Okay. Weird things we saw today. Here’s mine…

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6c027d28b8433e200021383992989faa394dbf92184b838e317d421cbf40b92a.jpg

    On a scale of 1 to a zillion…

    • Vecchioivan

      No pic, but I saw five whitetail doe today as I was driving home from the gym. They all seem to be headed for the Methodist church. I have no explanation for this.

      • Suse

        Hmmm…

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Must the plural of gendered deer be uninflected as is the ungendered? e.g. a pair of buck?

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Pillars of salt licks?

    • Suse

      Pretty. I love lizards.

      • snark-lurker

        You would.

    • proudgrampa

      I played Black Sabbath at 78 speed and then I SAW GOD!

      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        Why, was it his turntable? I’ll bet he was pissed at what that did to the needle.

    • Courser_Resistance

      I believe that’s a variety of Veiled Chameleon!

    • Ωbjectifier
      • TJ Barke

        But does Jonny have a bitchin’ camaro?

        • Ωbjectifier

          His parents drove it over from the Bahamas.

        • Jonny On Maui

          Ah, no…

    • TJ Barke

      Are chameleons native to Hawaii?

      • Jonny On Maui

        There’s all sorts of lizards and chameleons here. Go back far enough and everything is from different soil…

    • Sardonicuss

      Don’t they just run around on your walls eating bugs and stuff?

      • Jonny On Maui

        The geckos do if you let them.

        • Sardonicuss

          I was kind of joking that .that was a gecko.
          One of the things I remember about my long ago trip there….the geckos on the walls and nobody minding it.
          “Hey, there is a lizard running around on your wall!”
          “Yep. They live here.”
          Damn sure beats roaches!

  • Rick Hill

    Hey! You guys are a bunch of nerds here. Topical blend of nerd humor and douchebag Kirk, just for you.
    http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/1488126858-20170226.png

    • Bill D. Burger
      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        How timely – I’ve been rewatching ‘The Time Tunnel’ lately.
        A bit sad how poorly the show has held up over the years. Example: the episode about Pearl Harbor, even apart from the rather appalling Japanese stereotypes, gets much of the history wrong and completely misses their true motive for the attack. Did we really know so little in 1966?

    • Thiazin red

      I read something a while ago that totally changed how I thought about Back to the Future. What happens to good timeline Marty? When bad timeline Marty that we’ve been following the whole movie gets back to the present, he sees good timeline Marty leave. Where does good timeline Marty go?

      • Rick Hill

        I always wondered about all those time lines from Groundhog Day.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Are you implying that time travel narratives might contain paradoxes and unanswered questions?

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Goodness I’m hungry today. I’ve had 3 meals including my dinner early and I’m hungry again. Bipolar high or just the walking +/- 5 miles in heels today?

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Growth spurt?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I hope not. XD

    • Bitter Scribe

      Good heavens, I would devour an entire roast chicken after walking four miles in sneakers.

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      I’m pretty sure it’s the walking. Maybe you should consider adding another meal onto your day (or at least a snack). I am also hungry and I’m not sure why since I have not engaged in exercise (I’ve been lethargic recently).

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Yeah, I’m pretty much going to have to eat soon, I’m really hungry.

        Your body still needs fuel, how have you been feeling?

        • IOnlyLikeCats

          Like my body has decided to stop processing food correctly for reasons I can’t possibly imagine. I’ll try to work out in a bit if only to justify some pie (or a cupcake).

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Sounds like a plan. :)

            I’m used to walking, and since I moved to this new neighborhood, I walk even more cos there are more great places to go, and with decent sidewalks I can enjoy my heels again. So, I hope that’s why my appetite is up.

          • Shanzgood

            I’m glad you don’t have to deal with your shitty neighbors any more!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Oh, me too! It had gotten really bad. Supposedly, the worst one was being evicted, but I left before the supposed 30 days he had was up.

    • janecita

      Did you find any goodies at the thrift store?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I did! A Denim miniskirt, a kittie-print belt, and sealed-in-package Red Thigh-high stockings from Victoria’s Secret. Total: $6.39.

        :D

        • janecita

          That’s awesome! Five years ago, I found a new pair of Ferragamo shoes for $15.00 at a thrift store in Manhattan. I was so fucking happy that day!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Dayum! That is a real come-up, Girl. :D

            Most of the clothes at this place were more conservative than would suit me, but it’s half-a-mile away, so I’ll just keep checking back. :)

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I’m hungry every day.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        You and my kid both! It’s like every. damn. day! What’s up with that?

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          Some of us are “differently stomached.”

  • Martini Ambassador

    It’s Friday. Rest. You’ve earned it.
    https://twitter.com/ftcreature/status/838916398285996032

    • DainBramage

      Baa! Ram! Ewe!

  • Suse
    • proudgrampa

      Very classy! I like it.

      • Suse

        Me, too. It’s perky.

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I love that she changes it up whenever she wants.

    • Gosala

      The old do needs improvement, but to my eye, the new one ages her about 10 years.

      • Suse

        I think she looks younger.

        • Gosala

          Well there you go. Eye of the beholder and all. Still it’s her hair and her life; so my opinion doesn’t matter.

          If she likes it, good.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        Respectfully disagree. I likes me short hair, I do.

      • Yr. Gma

        It’s just the lighting in those two photos.

        • Serai 1

          Also one has greater resolution, so more details.

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      It’s nice she doesn’t have to care what anyone thinks anymore. I think her 20 year old self would approve.

    • janecita

      She looks good, and red is definitely her color!

      • puredog

        I bet she doesn’t wear her MAGA hat much.

    • Shanzgood

      Sassy!

  • Shoto
  • Anna Elizabeth

    When you used to buy “Queen-size” stockings, and the “Medium” Victoria’s Secret Red Thigh-highs you found sealed-in-package at the thrift store for $1.95 fit, *that* is a fucking come-up. XD

    • Suse

      I haven’t worn stockings (pantyhose/tights) in 10 years (or a dress/skirt).

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I love them, especially with a garter belt. I met my FWB/maybe Hit-it-and-Quit-it in my pencil miniskirt & fishnet stockings just the other day. XD

      • Carpe Vagenda

        I swear by dresses/skirts. If you wear them long and loose enough, dresses/skirts are the sweatpants of gainful employment.

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          A summer maxi dress is the most comfortable and cool thing one can wear and it took me until I was almost 30 to figure that out.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I’m looking for a nice sundress or two with the change-of-season.

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            Right?! I was anti-dress until I realized I didn’t have to wear tights, a slip, uncomfortable shoes, pilgrim collars and fifteen pounds of ruffles the way I did when Mom dressed me for church as a kid!

          • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

            Yes! Oh man, I wonder how often church as a kid is the reason for hating dresses no matter what when older. I even keep old comfy ones that look shabby as my ‘house dresses’ at this point.

          • Shanzgood

            I bought a very pretty one last summer but I might need to alter it to add a slit. I apparently don’t have a very ladylike stride so it ends up feeling like a hobble-skirt.

          • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

            All of mine have to be knit pretty much, and full skirted for the same reason. Are you tall? Just say you have a long stride because you’re tall. That’s my excuse.

          • Shanzgood

            About 5’7″ (or maybe less if I’ve shrunk). And, yeah. I have lots of knit skirts for the “I still need to walk” reason. Man, though, I have a bunch that I need to give away because they’re falling off me. Maybe if I get this new job I can go shopping….

          • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

            Extra fingers crossed on the job thing and potential new clothes.

          • Shanzgood

            Thanks! I kind of hope I don’t need them and can just stick with my usual jeans.

          • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

            Ooh yeah. Caveat to that wish then – potential new clothes just for funsies.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Did you try to “catwalk” in it? That’s actually something I love about skirts and heels – I’m forced to walk slower and learn more feminine stride and posture. When I wear flats, I still tend to stride like RAF Quick-time.

          • Shanzgood

            Nooo…catwalk? When I wear heels I have an even longer stride.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Try this: walk kind of heel-to-toe – like a model on the catwalk – and say “push” in your mind every time your heels contact the ground, like you’re trying to push the heel in.

            Cars slow down to watch me walk since I started doing this. XD

          • Shanzgood

            I can’t really do that. I had a bad accident as a kid and now it’s easier for me to look more normal by walking on the balls of my feet. If I walked heel-to-toe I would have a very noticeable limp.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Ahh, sorry to hear that.

            It just makes for a sexier stride, and it helps me with posture and body language. :) That is one of the joys of my life, that many things are learn-able skills. :)

          • Shanzgood

            I guess my body language/stride is usually I AM BUSY DO NOT FUCK WITH ME

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Not the worst presentation to make. XD

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Oh, hey, go you. I never a day in my life had the kind of confidence it takes to buy thigh highs.

      That said, you know you can get them dirt cheap from Hanes.com, yes?

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I did not know that, I was getting them from Amazon and they weren’t cheap, so thank you!

        I love thigh-highs, and I like my skirt to show at least a hint of where they top out. :D

        • Jennifer R

          I wish I had the guts to pull that off.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Why not try it at home first? That’s what I did, I’d wear them with cute heels and practice walking inside until I was used to them.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      You girls and your shopping finds. Why, I never get this excited when I’m at the rusted metal shop or the gravel & raw meat emporium. {snorts, hawks up a loogie, adjusts self.}.

      • Raan

        Weird, you’d think they’d keep the gravel with the rusted metal.

        • The gravel is used to tenderize the meat.

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          On opposite sides of the road around here.

      • Jennifer R

        That must be some unimpressive meat.

        • Lance Thrustwell

          Ooohh…

          • Jennifer R

            Name/post combo

  • Raan

    Yr Unofficial Wonkette D&D Session Recap:

    Half the party didn’t show for various and sundry reasons, so in the interest of not having to play catch-up, the session was postponed.

    • HazooToo

      Nooooooooo!
      Time to make up stories about the epic adventures you had while they were gone.

      • Raan

        So, you’re saying it’s time for lies, damn lies, and statistics?

        • HazooToo

          “We found the Rod of Lordly Might, but since I was playing your character while you were gone, I decided the Paladin would be more likely to donate it to a homeless shelter. Along with your +2 plate and your horse.”

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      During the brief time I actually knew people who played, the members and attendance of our group varied so much that I rarely did anything other than create new characters.

    • Jennifer R

      My game is getting ready to enter a deruger town. This should be interesting.

      • Raan

        Actually, now that I think about if for a minute, we might have needed this break after being utterly fucked by skeletons last session.

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          I read utterly as literally and was about to ask exactly what kind of D&D you guys are playing.

          • Raan

            I mean, it’s not unthinkable that a skeleton arm may have entered that region during combat.

          • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

            So the awesome kind of D&D then. Good to know.

        • Jennifer R

          We have had some super hot rolls when combat time rolls around. Beat a combat with a challenge rating 10 times the one suggested for our group level (that is usually a run away from event).

        • data_ninja

          You had the total opening for “we got boned by skeletons”. C’mon, let’s pick up the pace here! These are easy ones!

    • Thiazin red

      I can do it next thursday, or one of the other days during the week.

      I did come up with an idea to get you out of the room. Our packs come with rope, so we can try to lasso your foot or something.

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      Wait, that was LAST Thursday?

  • Rick Hill

    Let’s not forget, in all the craezyness coming from all directions, to give some special lerv to paul ryan. The man who would look sadly on as he told you it was regretful but this was for your own good…as he personally tosses you into the Soylentization chippifier…
    https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/a9rnqw1_700b_v1.jpg

    • IOnlyLikeCats

      One of the people in this have a name similar to mine (won’t say who) only off by a letter or two and long story short I jumped out of my skin.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Too tiny for me to read!

      • The Librarian

        if you are on a desktop you can click it and make it larger. It’s worth it. :)

      • Rick Hill

        Thumbwheel click or right click and then click ti and it embiggens! Magic if the interwebs, Thanks Al.

      • Shanzgood

        On phone, open in new window

  • Michael R
    • Thiazin red

      I already knew I didn’t want kids, but the amount I laughed at this really proves that I shouldn’t have kids.

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        IKR? That big kitty is like, “I know his head will fit in my mouth!”

        Oh and swiped!

        • Thiazin red

          It reminds me of when my cat tries to bite things through the glass coffee table, but with a kid.

    • Shanzgood

      This is the real reason for not wearing stripes.

    • HazooToo

      I thought that was a dog for a minute

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      Damn, he looks so tasty, and his head would fit so nicely in my jaws!

    • Master Contrail Program

      Best Windex ad ever?

    • Greyhame

      The parents siting there on their phones filming the whole thing are the real heroes in this scenario.

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    Eh, I didn’t think that dad was funny at all – when he closed his eyes for a long time, i thought he’s thinking, “I am gonna beat those children SO bad!”

    But then again I had a meh day at work.

    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      At least it’s Friday? :/

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        Yes!
        Plus payday in a week (or really six days since direct deposit).
        My first full check!

        • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

          Yay! Man, that is just the most exciting thing about a new job, that first full paycheck. Today was our payday, so I’m just chomping at the bit to be done and out of here and try to forget about work for a few days. With food. And booze or whatever, as one does.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            lol…have fun with it!
            Don’t spend it all in one place –
            or do, its what I do. ; )

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        It feels like alt-Friday.

  • Suse

    Why are sales of Ivanka’s crap way, way up and who is buying it? Did Sillyanne’s endorsement encourage RWNJs to go shopping?

    • Shanzgood

      At least we’ll know them when we see them now.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I thought a bunch of department stores had dropped her crap?

      • Suse

        Some did. Neiman Marcus just brought her jewelry back. I think her website sales have been going up.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          It could be overseas sales:
          “Brand expert Eric Schiffer said while it’s possible Ivanka Trump got a “short term entrepreneurial explosion” from the press coverage, the Ivanka Trump brand was bound to grow — particularly overseas — now that its namesake is tied to “the glamor” of the White House.
          “She continues to represent the quintessential American woman that is successful, a mother and beautiful, and they want that image for themselves,” he said. “But there’s also a lot of women who see her as tied to someone who wants to take us back to the days of ‘Game of Thrones,’ and they’d rather buy from the devil.””

          • Anna Elizabeth

            JFC. I didn’t want her shit *before* this awful election.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            But it’s so glamorous!!!!

          • theCryptofishist

            Yeah, back to the days of “Game of Thrones” when fucking dragons flew over the earth…

        • HogeyeGrex

          Is it her company that’s reporting the beautiful, fabulous sales figures? I mean, we all know it couldn’t possibly just be face-saving bullshit. They’d never do anything like that.

    • snark-lurker

      mebbee like some impotant perp writes a book then buys a bunch hiser self

    • HazooToo

      To be fair, the stores that are still selling her shit have priced it out at like 99 cents, so most of the mouth-breathers can afford to be poorly dressed now.

    • Rick Hill

      Another Russian money laundering thing?

  • BMW

    This is why we can’t have nice things. Except when it isn’t. Which is most of the time.

  • The Librarian

    After Trump Was Elected, Librarians Had To Rethink Their System For Fact-Checking
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/after-trump-librarians-develop-new-fact-checking-system_us_58c071d3e4b0ed7182699786

    I love that they use something called the CRAAP test………true, not snark!

    • Shucky Ducky

      I love librarians.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    Henrietta, Oklahoma just legalized…dancing!

    • Nounverb911

      Kevin Bacon will be pleased.

    • Greyhame

      Oh no! Didn’t anyone think of THE CHILDREN?

  • How much better would this have been if Tighty McStickupass had reached down and swooped the kid into his lap and cuddled her while delivering a straight up policy wonk opinion on North and South Korea? I’d vote for a dude like that.

    • bopeep

      Exactly! Why does he push her away so roughly and why does mom yank her off the bed so roughly?

      • Serai 1

        Where did he push her away “roughly”? It was a gentle push to get her out of camera range. Jesus.

  • Nounverb911
    • Shanzgood

      These fuckers are monumentally stupid.

      • Rick Hill

        Nah. This is revenge

        • redarmyzombie

          Why not both?

        • Shanzgood

          Also that.

    • TJ Barke

      All glory to Arstotzka!

    • alpacapunchbowl

      I would place a wager that this was to harass him in retaliation for testifying, but no one with half a brain would take me up on that bet.

      • theCryptofishist

        Think of all the Trump voters you could bet with.

        • alpacapunchbowl

          Daaaaammmmmmn, I could pay off my grad school and law school student loans in one fell swoop!!
          Oh, but Trump voters. They probably can’t pay, or if they can they won’t, in honor of Dear Leader.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      This must be playing wonderfully with the base. This is not problem for them.

    • mancityRed6

      “We have to stop him.”
      “Again?”
      “Dude, his name is Muhammad. You know he’s a terrorist.”

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      Now it’s DEFINITELY personal.

  • I am watching Melissa McCarthy impersonator Spicer attempt to justify the last week. It’s painful, but i can’t find The Last Leg from tonight yet

  • Nounverb911
    • theCryptofishist

      You’d think being President Emeritus would get you off of eating with Bono.

      • theCryptofishist

        If nothing else, Secret Service ought to be able to wrestle him to the ground and take him out the back.

  • HazooToo
    • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

      Ha ha ha I saw that earlier. I spent the rest of the day at the head store, looking for a replacement for the one that exploded.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      Clearly samuel missed the flood of stories about how people who were pushed out of brokerage in the early oughts went back to the soil and simplified by buying seven-figure bed and breakfasts in New England…

      • HazooToo

        Really, all you need is a small loan from your father of a million dollars.

        • TJ Barke

          And then for him to die so you can become a billionaire. ANYONE CAN DO IT!

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            That’s what I keep hearing, but no matter how many billionaires die, I’m still not wealthy.

          • TJ Barke

            Just make sure one of them is your dad.

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            That’s what I mean. No matter how much I threaten them they just won’t adopt me and put me in their wills!

    • alpacapunchbowl

      FOR FUCK’S SAKE

    • Thiazin red

      Why yes, having rich ass parents and no money worries does make it easier to pay off loans. All those other people are just lazy and really should have made the choice to be born wealthy.

      The amount of cluelessness on the woman’s part is astounding.

      • theCryptofishist

        Why didn’t she just pay for her education outright?

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          And have to do without designer clothes and clubbing every night? What kind of monster are you?

          • theCryptofishist

            The Canned Clam Kind of Monster!

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      I feel bad now for just wasting all the condos people threw at me!

      • Lance Thrustwell

        They threw condos at you? I hope the association fees weren’t too high.

      • redarmyzombie

        I wonder what the exchange rate is between condos and iphones…

        • Greyhame

          You can have one or the other … or healthcare access, but you can only pick ONE, greedy moochers!

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea
    • HogeyeGrex

      Gob = smacked.

      Craig Nelson level of ignorant entitlement.

    • TJ Barke
    • IOnlyLikeCats

      For some reason I thought it was going to be useful advice about asking for help or something so clearly my faith in humanity is way too high.

      • HazooToo

        Take some reassurance from the replies. She’s become Twitter Famous as a colossal, entitled idiot.

    • shaar dula

      oh ya. these people. i see them everyday. fuck them.

    • OrG

      Some bootstraps are better than others.

    • Why yes, who hasn’t had their parent give them a condo? Tsk, I wish mine had thought of it, I joined the military to pay my loans off…

    • Reddishrabbit

      That reminds me of someone famous. He had a hard time, being sent to military school because he loved his switch blade knifes too much. But than through hard work he got demoted from squad leader because of bullying. And after going to Wharton school he works for his miserly KKK loving father and after taking a small million plus loan he lied to the city and got a deal to build a hotel. And than with all the money he built he hired the best people to start a casino empire. After not listening to the best people he went bankrupt. Luckily his father gave him more money and the banks decided to bail him out. And a few years later someone made fun of him so he put his tiny hands to work to show up that Nobama who saved America and got elected president. And now all the dictators want to stay at his hotels and buy extremely flammable scarves. Yeah American dream!

    • Serai 1

      Richies always think they have it harder than anyone else.

    • redarmyzombie

      But don’t you realize she had to eat ramen noodles on an ironing board? She had *so* hard!

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      I’m sold! How do I get that job working for her mother?

  • Tofu Killer

    I am reminded of a joke that was told and retold endlessly during my activist days.

    Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: That is not funny.

    To be accurate it should be “painfully insecure feminists” since true feminists are by far the funniest people on earth, but it ruins the scan of the joke.

    • Shucky Ducky

      Unfunny feminists are a sadness to the sisterhood [they’re still sisters, just sisters I don’t like so much as the funny drinky ones].

      • Shanzgood

        I maxed out my tolerance level for humorless feminism 25+ years ago during my rabid Dworkin-fan phase.

        • Shucky Ducky

          I could never abide Dworkin–I liked porn too much. Annie Sprinkle was my feminist icon. I was an undergraduate at my state university in 88-92; major in Women’s Lit, minor in Women’s Studies. Active in student groups. There was just so much unfunny earnestness–I never enjoyed it and in my old age it just gives me the sadz.

    • artem1s

      haha, that reminds me of when I was in art graduate school and a bunch of us got together and rented Dr. Strangelove (yes, rented a video, I am an old). Two self-styled ‘feminists’ in our group stood in the back of the room for the first half hour and muttered ‘this isn’t funny’ every five minutes until we told them both to fuck off. One of them thought shaving all of her body hair off in a performance piece was the height of originality and cutting edge art. I told her she wouldn’t have made it an invitation only event behind closed doors if she really was cutting edge and instead should have done it at high noon in the middle of the campus green. Needless to say, we were not on speaking terms after that.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        JFC. Talking and whining during a Kubrick film is asswhupping worthy in my home.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Also too – a reading of “Dr. Strangelove” suggests that the big problem is every male in that movie is compensating for a small pecker, to the point of annihilating civilization to “Prove” their “manhood”.

        Of course, seeing that would require watching the film, rather than being a whiney bitch.

    • Serai 1

      The answer I heard was, “One, and it’s not funny!” Fits the standard form better.

  • Woohoo! Found The Last Leg, so i got to turn off the Melissa McCarthy impersonator. Prof. Brian Cox is gonna be on!

    • shaar dula

      which one was it right or left?

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Give me Cox!

  • Sardonicuss

    Since tomorrow is going to be a decent seasonal high of 60 and rainy (vs 85 like yesterday) I can fire up the oven and I have de-rusted and re-seasoned my 16 inch iron skillet:
    Tomorrow is actual deep dish pan pizza day! First time I have used the iron skillet method. I think I have the crust down to a fairly good science.
    Yum.

    • HazooToo

      I like to make pizza on naan bread. It gets crispy but stays soft and all the bubbly bits make natural grips to keep the toppings from sliding off.

      • Resistance Fighter MausFeet

        What. You kind of blew my mind a little with that and I’m going to try it very soon.

        • HazooToo

          Highly recommend you also put on garlic butter instead of sauce! It’s unbelievably good!

      • Sardonicuss

        The good thing about this is.the crust is so thick and airy, and I lay the ingredients on so thick. Once piece is a meal. So I can stretch it out for leftovers for a week….and the reheated version is almost better than the first (re-heated in the skillet on a burner with a top for like 5 minutes)..

        • Anna Elizabeth

          About 20 years ago, my dad would make me Deep Dish Iron Skillet Pizza. It’s delicious!

        • HazooToo

          Loooove it! I got away from thick crust for a long time coz my Mom was diabetic and carbs were the enemy, but it does make everything so much more filling.

          • Sardonicuss

            I only do it in the winter. I can’t use the oven when it gets warmer (use the oven to heat the house…use the grill all summer), plus I rationalize the low temp burns the carbs…and I use one cup of wheat flour in the crust…but damn it is good.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        And if you make two and slap ’em together like a sammich, that’s naan-on-naan action!

      • Sardonicuss

        I have seen that on various shows but never made it. This has been the winter of …making bread..after 20 year of not.It coincides with being the winter of “not being able to afford shit” …so it is working out fairly well. Flour is pretty cheap!

    • Reddishrabbit

      I could have done that yesterday when it was 60 here. But now that it is 32 and dropping. But no global warming nope.
      Also sounds good, I’ll bring some whiskey (no promises of a full bottle)

  • Nounverb911
    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      It’s missing the stacks labelled ‘selling off military equipment with no oversight.’

  • Nounverb911
  • Martini Ambassador

    This mom knows nothing about Korea. But she does have some cute babies: https://www.littlethings.com/rare-quadruple-lambs/

  • tapp_my_wire,please

    Spicer: Jobs reports were phony in the past, but real now.
    I worked this same script on my parents over school grades for years.
    Can I haz a WH spox job now?

    • Nounverb911

      I’m sure the position will be available soon.

    • efoveks

      what about the 94,000,000 unemployed?????

      • Nounverb911

        93,999,999 I got a summer job…

      • tapp_my_wire,please

        I called in sick of working in 2015 and never went back.

      • Thiazin red

        They’re fine with using the unemployment rate now.

        Okay, how long till trump starts claiming that he created 90 million jobs?

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Monday?

    • Reddishrabbit

      Mr Trump never said they were fake, that’s fake news and any report or videotape or audio or tweeter otherwise is nothing more than the lamestream media fake news.

      Deputy WH spox?

      • shaar dula

        when you say Mr. T who do you mean – the supremacist pa or the german grampa?

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      No, you can’t have the WH spox job. You mentioned that you were in school. You are not qualified.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Or, even worse, overqualified.

  • Nounverb911

    Rachel Maddow has been talking about this for a while now….
    https://twitter.com/jpacenti/status/840340013967650817

    • shaar dula

      tarmac sharing, so that’s what the oldies call it these days.

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        Well, I hope it was good for both of ’em. /s

      • Rick Hill

        That’s what the wealthy jet setters call it

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
    • Rick Hill

      You know, he did seem suddenly renewed, that last week. as though the word had been delivered “Just hang in there, the fix is in.”

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      Was Harrison Ford involved?

  • mancityRed6
    • shaar dula

      did you see the stack size comparison spiel? i cant believe this level of idiocy is the new normal.

      • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

        I didn’t see the thing. They were talking about stack size? Damn! That’s the problem! The stack is too small and the OS could not handle too many subroutines! No wonder the Trump maladministration is crashing and locking-up!

        Programming joke, move along.

        • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

          something something recursion, also too

          • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

            That might explain Trump’s funny talks. He recurses himself off of his short stack when he talks.

          • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

            And eventually the return vector gets popped off as data, so the next return goes to some other data, like “emails” or “taco bowls”.
            We see this on 8051-based systems all the time. Too many I/O processes, not enough stack memory.

          • CindyinEncinitas

            Mo ther fu cking I/O processes.

          • JustDon’tSayDieInJail

            Well, if weren’t for i/o, we wouldn’t need the other processes, would we?

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I’m getting used to having a bunch of loons running the country. I can’t wait until their policies complete the usual meltdown that they always do. It should take a few years until we have a massive recession.

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Years? Optimist! I’m expecting one by the end of Summer when the Obama bump is gone and the GOP’s ‘economic’ ‘policies’ really kick in.

          • Vagenda and Pee-ara

            It usually takes them a few years to ruin the economy, and then say “it was that guy before me who ruined everything!”

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            Yes, usually, but you forget that they’re trying their best to tear everything down as fast as they can, before the FBI shows up on their doorsteps. And if President Bannon gets the trade war he’s angling for…

    • Hamilton Ω, AKA Formerly DN

      Sphincter is near-sighted and didn’t have a mirror available this morning. Give him a fucking break!

      • mancityRed6

        I’ll give him something.
        And I’ll wear my cheap shoes ’cause I won’t want one back.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      I’m guessing he put the pin on the right side up (no pun) and the flag turned itself into the omfg position.

    • theCryptofishist

      When he looks down and checks, it’s right side up.

      • mancityRed6

        what does he do when he takes a piss?

        • theCryptofishist

          Hide in a stall because there’s no way he’d impress any man at the urinal.

  • Nounverb911
  • Dazza

    Good morning, Wonkers.
    It is election day here in Western Australia, so I am off to my post at the polling station. If I am lucky, there will be a sausage sizzle fund-raiser there, too. I know we in WA are far away from you guys still stuck in yesterday evening – but I will keep you advised as to the results. The polls project a Labor government, but I thought Hillary would win, so I am NOT getting my hopes up.

    Cheerio until your tomorrow.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0bf52873c7787962a6f782cd705cfeda14c32066b0274b6521a7b1130a529afb.jpg

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Cheerio! :)

      • efoveks

        Anna Elizabeth! You’re back! (YAY!) :)

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yiss, and thank you. :) Stuffs got worse before they got better, but life is looking *way* better now. New apartment, new neighborhood, new attitude. :)

          • efoveks

            You go get ’em girl!

    • TJ Barke

      G’day Bruce!

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        S’hot enough to boil a monkey’s bum!

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      You get FED AT POLLING PLACES?
      Think I could move there if I get my not-really-brother’s mum to adopt me? I already know how to drink beer and drive on the left, and I’ve seen all the Mad Max movies…

      • CeeQ

        You had us at drink beer. Welcome! Sorry but voting is compulsory but on the plus side – there’s sometimes food! And if you’re lucky, someone will stroll off the beach and vote in their swimming trunks! Because as I’ve stated – compulsory to vote. 😃😃

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Doesn’t bother me. I don’t think I’ve sat out an election since I was old enough to vote, and that was so long ago that I voted for Justin’s DAD.

          • CeeQ

            😃😃😃

    • CeeQ

      I miss sausage sizzles.
      Also – my parents are going to Perth later this week! They’re visiting Melbourne as I type. Must be nice to be semi retired!!

  • VirginiaLady

    If you weren’t laughing yourself to tears over that clip you are not a parent. It’s also clear that mom is the authority and handles crisis situations within the family. You can’t do a flawless acrobatic door slam like she did without lots of practice.

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      I thought she might be the nanny. She looked kind of terrified.

      • Beanz&Berryz

        Anyone who’s had to handle kids. You’re not really the boss of them. And. Those of us with kids who chose to go along with our system get to look like we’re good only because the kids chose to be. All of us look bad if the kid decides to behave a la carte.

        • Vagenda and Pee-ara

          That little girl was awesome with her glasses and her marching. She’s like an older version of Donna Rose.

  • Nounverb911

    Snowflakes are getting even more snowflakier.
    https://twitter.com/ParkerMolloy/status/840357935259779072

    • Vagenda and Pee-ara

      It’s hard out here for a white girl. That’s all I know, plus I’m still waiting for a White History Month, snowflakes.

    • shaar dula

      its like they have a persecution complex. hmm cannot be.

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Don’t show up at church on a Sunday and all your fellow congregants will talk badly about you.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      I saw a bumper sticker earlier this week which said “Legalize Jesus”. Turns out Jesus is already legal, and people are stupid.

      • DainBramage

        A more honest bumper sticker would read, “Legalize my ability to cram my RWNJ Jesus down your throat, heathen!

        • snark-lurker

          JESUS WAS RIGHT& WHITE

        • efoveks

          That’s damn heathen to you!

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Pretty much exactly so.

      • Rick Hill

        They aren’t allowed to include the “mandatory” part of that phrasing, just yet

      • CindyinEncinitas

        Well don’t that just beat all…

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Shocking!

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Well, Paul Ryan is doing what he can to make Jesus of Nazareth illegal.

      • sadboy

        No problem with legal Jesus as long as it’s for medicinal purposes. Just keep it in your home, cuz if kids get it, it can harm their development.

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Haha!!!

    • Rick Hill

      Ik,r? Just last week we had a public stoning of a man who was preaching the Word on the street corner. What really sucks is that our monthly feeding he christians to the lions is on hold because PETA has filed a cruelty suit alleging today’s christians have such an unhealthy diet that the lions are developing coronary issues because of devouring so much sanctified fatty tissues.

      • Begin Anew Day

        SFT’s?

        Where? Point me at em!

        NOM! NOM! NOM!

        –Cthulhu

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      They also believe that they have a ‘personal relationship’ with a Jewish guy who was executed for sedition a couple thousand years ago. What they believe doesn’t seem to have any meaningful connection with reality.

  • Reximus
    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
      • Thiazin red

        Seriously, he and Troi must have banged every alien species the enterprise met.

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          To explore strange new aliens

          To seek out new kinks and perversions

        • Begin Anew Day

          Kirk the Elder banged it all first!

          And if he couldn’t bang it he blew it (up with phasers)!

          • AJ Milne

            I’ve been watching the original (yes, but with CGI) Trek sporadically lately on Netflix, usually when I can’t sleep… Not quite the kinda superfan knows it inside out, rather: watched it after school in the 70s when we had like three channels, and got to wondering recently, seeing it in the line-up: how did it hold up? Had I really seen them all? Kinda remembered the overarching mythology, not so much details…

            And I’m not sure if it’s just the ones I happen to be picking out, but geez, it’s like every other one so far has some variation of alien babe/Kirk action. Several, indeed, seem to involve some form of abduction/capture plot… Aliens actually _attack_… And apparently mostly to get sex with Kirk…

            I worry now this might have really messed with my expectations, watching this before puberty. As, in retrospect: there’ve been rather fewer such events in my life than maybe that suggested I could count on. Way less ‘I have a ray gun, come to bed’ than I just naturally figured would follow.

    • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

      What did I just watch?

  • Rick Hill

    You know. Thinking about the DNA test law that’s out there. Thing is, corporations likely won’t avoid hiring you because you are genetically inclined to develop diabetus, heart disease, the ghey. They will more likely let you work out most of your time there and fire you right before they project you will develop those diseases and add costs to their employee insurance plans, or something

    • alpacapunchbowl

      They’re cool with science if they can fuck us over with it.

      • Rick Hill

        ‘Course there are companies who will be totes cool with selling your info to advertisers, as well

        • snark-lurker

          AOT,K

  • Pinkham’s Law
  • Nounverb911
    • snark-lurker

      HUMANITY !!! IT’S ALIVE!

    • Sardonicuss

      It’s all just like….transformation of energy man…!

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      I Laughed, I Cried. Then my battery went dead.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Well it says NO outlet, duh! Where you think you gonna poke that thing, huh?

      • snark-lurker

        didnut read the sign first

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Duuude.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Dang, just startled the cat!

  • theCryptofishist

    She’ll bounce huh. Does Donna Rose have those spring heels so prominently featured in cartoons?

    • snark-lurker

      flubber-lined nappies

  • Nounverb911

    While the Bannon is away the rats will play….
    https://twitter.com/kylegriffin1/status/840362591083986944

    • TJ Barke

      Sounds pretty good apart from the crushing costs part.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
    • Reximus

      The Washington Examiner
      is reporting on a Tuesday meeting between Trump and the House GOP Whip
      team, where Trump has threatened that either they get the votes for this
      monstrous bill, or he will primary those GOP members up for reelection
      in 2018.

      Don Trumpy: “That’s a nice congressional seat you have there. It’d be a shame if something happened to it. “

      • snark-lurker

        : )

      • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

        He loves threatening people.

    • Greyhame

      Damn that Obama, pushing through Repeal & “Replace” without giving us a choice!

    • Serai 1

      “Obamacare 2.0”??? Jesus fuck, what fucking ASSHOLES.

    • Claire

      What on earth does Breitbart have against Trumpcare? I thought they’d be all for screwing the proletariat to give tax breaks to the Jerb Creators.

      (I realize I could read the article and find out. But I don’t want Breitbart cooties.)

  • Nyumbu

    I have watched this an uncountable number of times today. There’s so much win, starting with the carefully arranged stacks of books to hide the fact that his office is also the guest bedroom.

    • Thiazin red

      The map really sells it as a serious place.

  • Serai 1

    So my CT scan having come out clear, my doctor has put me on medicine for acid reflux. Says we have to try that before we can do an endoscopy, as them’s the rules, apparently. So I’ll be taking these pills until I see him again in a couple of months, and if I’m lucky, we won’t have to go any further. I can do with taking a pill every morning if it’ll get rid of this THING that won’t go away!

    • CindyinEncinitas

      So glad, dearie. I was worried about you.

      • Serai 1

        Thank you! I’m perfectly willing to admit that what this FELT like is nothing like what it actually is, should things turn out that way. I just want it gone, since I’ve got other things for my doctor to work on!

    • Nyumbu

      Tested for h.pylori?

      • Courser_Resistance

        They’ll do that if/when they do the endo. They did mine at the same time I got my colonoscopy. You might say I got hosed from both ends….

        … I’ll let myself out.

        • Suse

          I had a blood test for pylori. It was negative. Also, blood test showed I have celiac disease, but the endoscopy was negative. I still don’t know why I’ve had abdominal pain for 6 years.

          • Serai 1

            If you have celiac, wouldn’t that be a possible cause?

          • Suse

            I don’t have celiac, according to the endo and biopsies. Doc said blood test was false positive.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Phew! That’s definitely do-able. I took Omeprozole for years.

  • Jamoche

    And again…
    http://www.sfgate.com/news/us/article/Muhammad-Ali-s-son-says-he-was-detained-again-at-10993542.php

    Muhammad Ali Jr. was detained and questioned at a Washington airport before being allowed to board a flight to Fort Lauderdale after meeting with lawmakers to discuss a separate airport detention incident last month

    • snark-lurker

      The hell!

    • Greyhame

      Because of course they would!

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Flying while Muslim may eclipse driving while black as the riskiest endeavor.

      • Begin Anew Day

        Unlikely. DWB is fully endorsed by centuries of TRADITION.

  • Rick Hill

    So…I notice a lot of youse guys like to spend some time cooking your fancy stuff. Myself, well….lets just say that Mrs Hill once told me that the dogs won’t eat my cooking. Anyway, not to be deterred, I thought I’d try making some sushi. Let me know what you think of my first effort.
    https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/ad7V1gQ_460s.jpg

    • Courser_Resistance

      Daw, that looks like a budgie in a sock! Being cute! DO NOT EAT!

      • Rick Hill

        It’s supposed to be raw, though. Right?

        • Courser_Resistance

          Raw… Perhaps. Living? Never. Budgie is lookin’ at me so IT’S ALIIIIIIIVE!!!!

          • GodEmperorCaptainHowdy

            Moar hilarities.

      • TJ Barke

        I think it’s a hand towel.

        • Rick Hill

          Hey! A good cook learns to make a few shortcuts, here and there

        • Courser_Resistance

          I also suspect it’s a peach-faced lovebird but budgie popped in my mind.

          • Rick Hill

            Substitutions are allowed

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      YOU MONSTER!11!

      • Rick Hill

        Oh. You elitists. You proly get offended if I use ketchup on it, too.

        • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

          Miracle Whip or GTFO.

    • What’s the bill for a tasty morsel like that?

    • Serai 1
    • Begin Anew Day

      needs more propane torch!

  • Jamoche

    In any normal year, this would be a headlining scandal all by itself:
    http://www.politico.com/story/2017/03/trump-appointee-muslims-maggots-sid-bowdidge-235945

    President Donald Trump appointed a massage therapist from New Hampshire with no apparent relevant experience to work at the Energy Department, but parted company with the employee Friday after a series of anti-Muslim social media posts came to light

    • Rick Hill

      I literally read that, shook my head and said “What?!?”

    • TJ Barke
    • alwayspunkindrublic

      What could possibly have gone wrong?

    • tapp_my_wire,please

      But, who will provide the neck rubs now?

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Jesus, it’s Dubya sending inexperienced political connections to remake Iraq all over again.

      • snark-lurker

        thatz not funny

    • Sardonicuss

      Given that the State Dept. (and all the others for that matter) are basically un-staffed. I doubt bad twit history will be a problem in a few months.
      The guy he met at the KFC drive through will probably land an ambassadorship somewhere…

  • Nounverb911
    • Courser_Resistance

      Even better than a hamster wheel! Cat exerciser!

    • Begin Anew Day

      These evil gifs are using up all my spare time!

  • Gosala

    Tomorrow comes early. Good night and good luck.

    https://youtu.be/kbJcQYVtZMo

    • Jonny On Maui

      Good night Gosala.

  • Sardonicuss

    I sprang for second seasons of “Humans” and “The Expanse” …as a cord cutter on Google Play.
    The Expanse first season finally showed up on Amazon Prime for free….so yoink ..binged that.
    Humans I had to pirate the fist season…and so was hooked to buy the second.
    Anywho……both great beyond my expectations. HBO quality shows from AMC (and BBC) and Scifi.

    • TJ Barke

      Holden comes off as less of a knob in the books.

      • Thiazin red

        I laughed in the second book when Holden wants to do a public broadcast of the data, and Avasarala has to tell him to stop being an idiot. Holden, did you not learn anything from the first book about making public statements without getting all the facts?

        • TJ Barke

          Crissjen has a filthy fucking mouth.

          • Thiazin red

            I love her so much.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Just started watching The Expanse, which I didn’t know about.

      Dayum!

      • Sardonicuss

        It is just..so good. What BSG wishes it could have been…and more.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Who’s drankin’ tonight?

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      *hic*

    • shaar dula

      oh yeah. although imma stick to beer for a while tough.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Thank you for your service, comrade. Just got home…tired, filthy. Must walk dog to Beer Emporium ASAP. Duty beckons.

    • snark-lurker

      this lamp shade donut mean a thing me head got cold

    • shaar dula
    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Sailin’ with the Captain matey.

    • shaar dula
    • MynameisBlarney

      *belches loudly and raises pint glass*

      Aye!

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      Beer One. I think I’m going to start watching Scandal again. I’ve been trying all the made-fors on A-Prime, Hulu, and Flix and they are universally terrible.

    • HazooToo

      “I can’t work, I got four bed rats. I CAN’T WORK!”

      “A bed rat.”

      “I like a coke, a dry coke, and then call Sarah. FOOTBALL’S ON, SARAH! Go on then, walk forever, PORK PIE!”

      “I thought I let them go, a dead rat, them four bed rats, then called Sarah.”

      “I got angry.”

      “I punched Paul the rabbit, poor bed rat. ‘FOOTBALL’ said Paul, then Brian let roar.”

      “I won’t get my bed by a bat!”

      “I can’t talk, they can’t blow a hairdryer!”

      “I CAN’T DO IT!”

    • Jonny On Maui

      Not drankin’ but got the edibles ready for Eddie Izzard tonight. Ms.MLG may have a cocktail or 3…

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Molotov!

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Eddie is so edible!

    • shaar dula

      let find out who’s NOT drankin’ tonight and chase them.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        We can turn off the lights and music and pretend we’re not home when they stop by.

      • Anna Elizabeth

        I’m out of liquor, and broke. :(

        Naw, it’s all good. :)

      • Jenny

        I’m not. :o

        • shaar dula

          ok. so you called my bluff.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Traitor.

          • Jenny

            I have gained too much weight from nice food and drink. 2016 did not help. The amount gained from June to December was more than I gained the entire year prior. Fuck TRUMP! I am not going to be a fat alcoholic because he sucks!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            There are worse things than being a fat alcoholic. Right? RiGHT??!?

      • Courser_Resistance

        Not drinkin. Smokin’ up like a fiend tho.

        • shaar dula

          ok excused.

    • Sardonicuss

      I ran over a mattress in an alley with my trailer on my way to mow (riding mower in trailer).
      It wrapped itself around the axle and I spent an hour jacking up the trailer, removing the wheel and cutting wire mattress shit off of it.
      I threw it in the trailer, because I was having a rage stroke over loosing the entire afternoon to a fucking mattress…..
      On the way back, started thinking about the mattress and bed bugs..
      Arrived home (in the country) put mattress in burn pit, lit on fire, shucked all cloths, put in washer under “steam clean”…
      Showered for….a long time.
      Started drinking..immediately.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I smashed my hand helping my bestie move 6 pianos out to the desert for our annual Piano Burn tomorrow night. Thank God no nasty old mattresses were involved.

        • Sardonicuss

          I burned it with vengeance….

      • Courser_Resistance

        Fuck, that’s a bad day. Have another on me.

    • data_ninja

      I plan to be. I have to make the all important trip to the ‘pharmacy’, as I call it. My question is: beer or whiskey? It’s been a long ass week, but today was pretty good. I’d like to celebrate a bit, so I’m leaning whiskey. However, I don’t buy cheap beer either, so I’d be okay with either route.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I’m a fiend for the hops, so if my vote means anything…

        • data_ninja

          Only that your vote is immediately nullified… I’ll bet you like pineapple on pizza too!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            You really know how to cut a guy. I’d drink a Bud Light before I put pineapple on a pizza.

    • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

      Halfway through a glass of Cabernet

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Get to work. That barely qualifies as drinking so far.

        • Unmutual Tetsu Kaba

          Just got home from work not long ago…

      • Left Coast Tom

        Rockpile Zinfandel from Rock Wall here.

  • bluicebank

    Children are the most annoying critics. Because they are so cute when they do it.

    Also, the tykes are the only ones in this vid who make any sense.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I really like how the guy’s entire train of thought is derailed to somewhere on the continent. He totally loses what he was talking about, the distraction is so great.

      • Jenny

        The screaming from the drugged kid… Lol he should have just got up with his no pants and said “thats it, can’t get any worse!” Then shut camera off

        • theCryptofishist

          Wait! No pants? Is he a wonketter non=commenter?

  • Amelia

    Quote on the CNN notification about the DOJ firings:

    “This could not have been handled any worse.”

    Hey, it’s the Drumpf presidency tag line!

    • therblig

      Obligatory, “hold my beer”

  • Jonny On Maui

    I take it this is our open thread…

    As some of you know, I’ve been making my own cannabis meds for a while now. I make a low dose for nerve pain control and a stronger one for sleep assistance when needed. Both types are a simple sugar candy. Alcohol is the solvent I use to strip the decarbed cannabis. Since Ms.MLG has entered my life I have so much sweetness if I continue with the candies I see diabetes in my future.

    So I’m switching my method and process to coconut oil extraction and gel caps for the delivery system. Decarb takes place in the oil extraction process. I think I have the doses right and will find out soon. 😂

    I know others make their own meds. Anybody have any experience with coconut oil and gel caps?

    You know the tune, “You can ask anything you want at Wonkette’s open thread…”

    • Anna Elizabeth

      I cannot help with this, but I adore Coconut Oil as a skin treatment. Will you be ingesting some coconut oil in the gelcaps?

      • Jonny On Maui

        Yes. I’m filling the gel caps with the infused oil. From what I’ve read, coconut oil is good for you both internally and externally.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          That’s what I was thinking, it must be healthier than the sugar-candy filler. :)

        • Courser_Resistance

          I think some companies are using coconut oil but for topicals, no edibles that I’m aware of. But I see no reason why it wouldn’t work. I’d think you’d end up with a nice smooth, green oil.

      • shaar dula

        coconut oil is to my people what olive oil is to italians and windex is to that tv greek, but coconut oil on hair is magic. is great for hair + when followed by a hot shower is very relaxing.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          I adore it on my skin, I shave my legs in the tub, dry off, then apply the coconut oil, my skin is like silk since I started that. :)

          • Ms.MLG on Maui

            I won’t use anything else on my face. I pour some vegetable glycerin (check it out immediately!) and lemongrass essential oil in with it, then whip the shit out of it, until it’s light and fluffy. It’s the bomb.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            OOOh, I’ll try that!

            It’s funny, cosmetics have been good for my face. I used to have oily skin and way more acne, but my morning ritual, application, and not touching my face once the foundation is on have really improved my skin.

    • snark-lurker

      Do you spend a lot of time…alone?

      • Jonny On Maui

        Not so much any more… 😉

    • snark-lurker

      Do ever see things that are not there and if yes…
      How do you know they are not there?

      • Jonny On Maui

        Because when I go to grab them I come back with nothing.

        • snark-lurker

          so you do see things that are not there. now we gettin sumwear

          • Jonny On Maui

            Of course I see things that aren’t there. I’m a child of the late 60s.

          • snark-lurker

            there. solved.

    • Sardonicuss

      Well, you are already Iso-ing (which I used to do a lot of) why not just make oil and vape?
      I am sure your weed is plenty potent…add strawberry flavoring and it should be one hit and down for the count product.

      • Jonny On Maui

        Aw man, anything but strawberry…

        I’m looking at CO2 extractor for vape material…

        • Sardonicuss

          The reason I prefer vape to edibles…especially as an old. If it is too potent..you can eat your way out of it.
          With edibles…just have to ride it out.
          If you are already stripping with alcohol you are doing a concentrated product. (I used to make hash and oils..but just for smoking).and if you are putting in into gel caps it doesn’t matter what the flavor is….or rather does it matter what the flavor is?

          • Jonny On Maui

            I’ve vaped concentrates before and love the ease of use.

            I’m also very careful with the edibles. We’ve all had that overdose condition at some point.

          • Sardonicuss

            Hah! A couple of years ago…I spent a week in a casino hotel (actually a couple of hours) in Colorado being Maureen Dowd!..after too many cookies.
            Biggest room service platter evah!!

    • Vecchioivan

      Ever decarbox by baking your dope at a low temperature and then make tea? If you brew it with a strong regular tea, like Earl Grey, it’s palatable and provides a mellow, long-lasting stone.

      • Jonny On Maui

        I’m not a big tea drinker but one of the recipes I saw used infused coconut oil in a cup of tea.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      Goddammit, stop telling people I’m sweet! You’re ruining the rabid, murderous Feminazi image I have worked so hard to cultivate!

      • Jonny On Maui

        Okay. Hey y’all! Ms.MLG is a rabid murderous Feminazi that tastes like sugar!

      • SnarkON

        My head is going to explode. Did you two meet in the Wonkette comments?

        • Ms.MLG on Maui

          Yes!

        • Pinkham’s Law

          Wonkette dating service. Seems to work better than Match dot com – if you hook up in the non-comments, you HOOK UP!

          • SnarkON

            Wow!

    • Puck

      Had a friend that used to make tincture with coconut oil, worked pretty well. Only real downside was it would solidify a little bit in the corners but eh, not really a big problem.

      • Jonny On Maui

        Coconut oil is a solid below 76 degrees F. As long as the oil is below 100 deg F I can fill the caps with a dropper.

    • weejee

      The beloved Navy requires us to pee in cups. Don’t see that changing in the next three years, ten months, one week, four day, nine hours, and 31 minutes.

      • Jonny On Maui

        Been there, done that with the groundpounders. Some day we’ll come to our senses.

      • Sardonicuss

        Was on Waikiki beach one night with a guy who jumped ship from the Australian navy…because he knew he was going to flunk his weed pee test.
        Me, my buddy, a giant Somoan guy and the Aussy navy dude…sitting on the beach, looking at the full moon..smoking a ginormous incredible joint at midnight.
        Some memories stick with you…

    • SnarkON

      Is your real name Heisenberg?

      • Jonny On Maui

        LOL! No. More of mad alchemist…

    • Begin Anew Day

      I don’t see any mention of your energy exchange system.

      It is vitally important that you have a controllable energy input system.

      I would suggest a propane torch.

      Now what was the subject again?

      Oh fuck it! I gotta go! There’s some junk out back that is SCREAMING TO BE BE SET ON FIRE!

      EEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAW!!!!!!

      -Larry the Firebug

  • Rick Hill

    More proof that christians are very persecuted, now!!!
    https://media.giphy.com/media/kFiXOo9sbgO9q/giphy.gif

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Jehovah!

      Wait.

  • shivaskeeper

    This got longer than I anticipated quickly. Skip over it if you want, I won;t be offended.

    Some of the comments I’ve seen here and the threads I’ve been talking on have got me thinking about cultural perceptions and how they effect the way we think and react to thing.

    For an example of the kind of cultural perception I’m talking about, what do you picture if were to ask you to describe Hell from the Bible?

    Do you picture a lake of fire with demons and devils torturing the damned for eternity? Or all the circles? Rivers of blood and excrement? Satan running the show? In any case you probably have a pretty vivid picture of it.

    Which is odd, since Hell is mentioned in the Bible once as Tartarus and it’s not even implied to be a place of eternal punishment. There is a reference to Sheol in the OT, the lake of fire where the fallen angles await judgement (Tartarus), Also a few references to Hades, but the Greek Hades contained the entirety of the afterlife including their paradise..

    So where did your image come from? It was filtered through what you were taught, What you have read, and what you have seen. Everything from any ancient mythology you remember, to Dante, to medieval art, to Chick tracts, to descriptions from pastors and preachers, to the Hellraiser movies, and a 1000 other things.

    Which brings me to the IC and any investigations of DJT and his cronies and what is taking so long already. We have to try to not filter what the IC’s do through our cultural filters. None of them can operate like something like the CIA from a Jason Bourne movie. There is no having a fully functional spy cell set up halfway across the world while tapping into the local CCVT network, police and emergency services, commandeering satellites for imagery, and having 100 specialists on scene to crunch the data in 12 hours. It just doesn’t work like that. It makes great drama, but it’s not real. Or any action movie with FBI agents starting and conducting an investigation or operation with no input from the DOJ, right before the hero goes all loose cannon to settle a personal score with the bad guys.

    The truth is not all the 17 agencies have the same equipment or training, and even the agencies that are pretty well overlap with each other, like the military service agencies, focus on different areas and will look at the same set of data and come to different conclusions because they will focus on the data that effect their wheelhouse and should pass on anything that is another branch’s concern to the other branch to worry about.

    All investigations take time. Time to filter through the noise, and counter intel. Time to make sure what you think you know is accurate and how sure you are of it. Time to make sure you have the biggest picture you can get. Time to make sure all your T’s are crossed and your I’s are dotted. When that is all done, then they turn what they have over to the appropriate Law Enforcement agency to take further action. It all takes time, and patience.

    • Jonny On Maui

      Very well said.

      • weejee

        For this lapsed soul, hell would be an eternity of tRump tweets.

    • Courser_Resistance

      Thanks for that explanation and I think you’re right. It’s not nearly as simple as movies show it. I know from my grad school courses that there’s a lot of ‘noise’ that needs to be filtered out.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You touch on a very important thing here…the cultural filters. Mass media greatly distorts our perceptions of the world, and some of us are less able to grok this than others. The best example is “if it bleeds, it leads” local news, that puts an emphasis on the exceptions to what is going on, which is, let’s face it, pretty damn boring.

      • shivaskeeper

        It’s not even the “if it bleeds, it leads” to me. It’s how it’s presented as well. What words are used, what bits of cultural shorthand or tropes are presented with the story also go a long way toward getting the narrative to be perceived the way it’s supposed to be perceived. All POC on FOX news are thugs sort of thing. It makes the viewer engage the filters and biases they are supposed to make sure the point gets across the way it was intended.

        • cmd resistor

          I was never so happy as when my mom quit watching FOX. The other day we passed by it, and in 30 seconds, saw Tucker Fucker Carlson yelling at someone about sanctuary cities, and then a clip of what was supposed to be a bunch of leftists screaming when someone tried to open a town hall meeting (R) with prayer. They are always just so outraged about something, usually something that isn’t even real.

    • Amelia

      I think it’s absolutely true that the average person’s perception of what the IC is capable of, and how fast, is colored by pop culture and their own ideas.

      But I also think in this situation, with more people due to be deported every day, with more bills and unprecedentedly unqualified people being rammed through by congress, with violent fringe groups getting braver by the second, everything seems so urgent that it’s like the world is moving at hyper speed. It’s so easy to become impatient when it seems like the good things in the world are being dismantled brick by brick.

      We have the evil government from a spy movie, but the spies are working at real-life speed. It just sucks a little is all.

    • Doug Langley

      I picture unemployment. Countless strangers telling you that you’re just not good enough for them. Watching your bank account self-account.

      Yes, I’m self-absorbed, why do you ask?

    • cmd resistor

      I grew up with fundamentalist LUtherans but for some reason I thought Hell was located under my next door neighbor’s compost type pile, which actually made it a pretty small place. I really don’t know how I got to there. I thought Heaven was located over their clothesline. I know that didn’t come from the Lutherans.

  • TrixieB (formerly Grrrr…)

    *I* dunno … it’s a little earnest, but the overall idea is sound.
    Bill Moyers: Building Democracy in Trump Country
    http://billmoyers.com/story/thursday-building-democracy-trump-country/

    • Serai 1

      Earnest is what we need. A lack of earnestness got us here, among other things.

    • while i’m sure this is technically correct, i am sick to death of ‘trump country’ and ‘white working class americans’ and ‘left behind rural communities’ and ‘BAGGERS’ and all the bullshit media time these people have been sucking up for at least 25 years.

      we represent a far bigger portion of america, we have problems just like they do and we don’t vote against our own interests.

      fuck those people.

  • Begin Anew Day

    “…discombooberated…”

    Sometimes I laugh at well timed fart noise. :>))))

    And then sometimes I laugh at a word that is just GREAT!

    BTW-The little dare-demon in the whatchamacallit won the world!

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance
      • Begin Anew Day

        The prototype for Man Going His Own Way (with whining).

        • Courser_Resistance

          I never understood why that nice family just didn’t shove him out the airlock or strand him on a planet.

          • Doug Langley

            Cuz he was getting higher audience ratings than the star.

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            It turned into the ‘Will, Dr Smith and the Robot Show’ pretty quickly, didn’t it?

      • Rick Hill

        We’re doomed.

    • snark-lurker

      this new word…it’s the tits

    • CripesAmighty

      -and mom yanking him round the corner and out of the frame was the money shot.

  • Jenny

    I watched that vid again with my kids. My daughter said “I don’t get it.” My son said “that guy needs a better tv studio.”

    • Villago Delenda Est

      He needs to hire security to keep things that belong in the Green Room in the Green Room, for one thing.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Actually, according to the British media, most people, especially working women, were delighted to see a man working from a home office and thought it was hilarious. Even he thought it was hilarious (that tiny upturned smile at the end is the British version of howling with laughter).

  • Persistent Tennessee Rain

    Woo Hooooo! Watching The White Helmets on Netflix.
    Oh crap. Sub-titles! Gotta run!

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    OUCH! Looks like the rubes who voted for Trump are about to get to pay a lot more for health care so that the wealthy can get another tax cut:
    “As the New York Times Nate Cohn writes:

    Over all, voters who would be eligible for a tax credit that would be at least $1,000 smaller than the subsidy they’re eligible for under Obamacare supported Mr. Trump over Hillary Clinton by a seven-point margin. The voters hit the hardest — eligible for at least $5,000 less in tax credits under the Republican plan — supported Mr. Trump by a margin of 59 percent to 36 percent.
    It’s one thing for the (“failing”) New York Times to state this plain fact. It’s quite another for one of the (Trump-era) conservative movement’s most trusted news sources to say the same. For most on the right, the chief complaint with Ryan’s bill is that it’s too generous. Instead of the “market-based” solution conservatives were promised, this bill is “Obamacare Lite.”

    And there’s a whiff of this in Breitbart’s piece, which refers to Ryan’s bill as “Obamacare 2.0.” But the outlet’s analysis recognizes that virtually no one wants to live in Rand Paul’s anarcho-capitalist wonderland — they want better, more affordable health care, like the Republican Party has been promising them, over and over, for eight years.
    Per Breitbart:
    Part of what killed Hillary Clinton’s campaign was voters getting their massive Obamacare premium increases in the mail in October. Republicans seem eager to inflict that kind of fatal damage on themselves. The explosive reaction to Obamacare launched the Tea Party in 2010 and swept Republicans into Congress during the mid-term elections of 2014. The Left is furious and energetic under Trump. The 2018 midterm elections are right around the corner … The white, working class gave Trump a chance in 2016. They could easily begin voting Democratic again or drop out of the political process altogether after a healthcare betrayal.
    The truth is, there’s no Republican alternative to Obamacare that wouldn’t betray a large swath of Trump’s base. You can’t make the ACA work better for older, working-class people when your party’s first priority in reforming the law is to eliminate the part that transfers billions of dollars from millionaires to older, working-class people.

    Breitbart’s piece seems to intuit this, even if it never mentions the tax issue (and concentrates its populist fury on the prospect that the law might keep some “illegals” from dying preventable deaths).

    The article’s final recommendation is not for Trump to pursue a different health-care law, but rather to concentrate on passing “pro-American immigration reform,” so as to “end the era of cheap labor, low wages, mass immigration, hollowed-out communities, family disintegration, drug addiction, and suicide.”

    Breitbart is probably wrong to suggest that building a border wall will end the “era” of “low wages” and “suicide.” But, at least it knows that repealing Obamacare won’t end that era, either.
    And now, so do a good number of the president’s most avid supporters.”

    WAIT, SO BUILDING A WALL TO KEEP MESSICANS OUT WON’T LOWER MY INSURANCE PREMIUMS???? I demand an explantion!!!!!

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/03/breitbart-may-have-just-killed-trumpcare.html

    • Anna Elizabeth

      So, the grotesquely-stupid voters that chose this orange-hued abomination are going to feel the bite in their wallets?

      For fuck’s sake, America *really* needs to stop treating stupidity as a virtue. Perhaps the follow-on civilization will learn from our folly?

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        My tits are in a wringer over this one – on the one hand I really want to see those idiots who voted for Trump suffer, on the other hand, I don’t want any good people to suffer. I wish we could just repeal Obamacare for idiots.

        • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

          Right? Just repeal it for Trump voters. Leave the sane rest of us alone.

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        Ahhh! Nice to have you back, Anna!

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Thank you! It’s great to be back. :)

      • CripesAmighty

        Charlie Pierce tried to warn us in ’08. It obviously didn’t take.

      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        If there is one.

        • Anna Elizabeth

          A very real question at this point.

          No kidding, do the things you’ve always wanted to do, hug your loved ones, commit random acts of kindness, Live Now, Laugh Now, Love Now.

          I really don’t think there is much time left.

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            It’s still good advice even if somehow the white hats suddenly appear and save us all.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            Indeed. :) Live to have as few regrets as possible.

    • Serai 1
      • Shanzgood

        /random

        That’s what I feel like I look like when I try to put on more than a tentative swipe of lipstick and mascara.

        • Amy!

          That’s astounding.

          (sorry, big Rocky Horror fan)

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            Madness, takes control.

            Dr. Frank N. Furter took my cherry back in 1979. Nothing has ever been the same.

          • Villago Delenda Est

            But listen closer…not for very much longer…

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I’ve got to keep…..control…

          • Amy!

            I REMEMBER!

          • Villago Delenda Est

            (you mean “madness…takes its toll”)

          • Shanzgood

            I’ve never watched it. I just…yeah

        • theCryptofishist

          If I could pull make up off like that…

        • Courser_Resistance

          Same here these days. When I put on all the same makeup I used to wear when I last worked in an office, I’m like Yikes!

      • SnarkON

        “I woke up like this.”

      • Courser_Resistance

        I always find this gif fascinating. Tim Curry is not a man I find in the least bit attractive, but in this form, he’s absolutely sex on a stick. I love how Curry can project this as an actor. Camp it may be but it’s also an excellent example of almost literally disappearing into a character.

    • Francis Parsons

      If only, if only, those voters could connect the dots and see the correlation. But they can’t. These are not deep thinkers to begin with, and they’ve been lied to and sold a fake American story for so long that they can’t even begin to question it.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        I heard on the news tonight that factories are having a hard time filling their job openings because the labor market is tight. Thanks, Obama! Oh, wait, it was Trump who engineered this huge turnaround in his first month in office. Employment numbers are no longer fake!

        • Jenny

          The irony is that the economy will tank again. Who will get blamed? OBAMA

          • theCryptofishist

            And Jimmy Carter.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            Let’s not forget FDR.

          • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

            I”ve been saying exactly the same thing. As soon as the economy actually starts reflecting Trump’s nightmarish policies, of course it’ll tank. And yep, they’ll somehow blame Obama for super-secret sabotaging or something. These people are a cargo cult, more stupid and primitive than we could ever imagine.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        Yes. Exactly. They would literally have to allow the bill to pass, and actually receive the bills, and even then if Trump told them “that’s just for now, don’t worry, I will pay you all back personally out of my own pocket because I’m that nice” they’d still go for it. “Ah don’t lahk them darkies” is pretty much the extent of their cognition. “They’re SCARY! That nice whahtt man’s gonna GIT them, and also tell them smartypants to go fuck themselves! YAHHOOO! MAGA! Who needs doctors! I ain’t sick today! LIBTARD TEARS MAKE ME LAUGH!”

        • Francis Parsons

          That’s alarmingly accurate.

      • Rags

        Voters who made the evidence-free decision to vote for 4-5 will not be persuaded by additional evidence.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      This bill is about NOTHING aside from repealing every last tax on the parasite overclass used to help finance the ACA, and even that is not enough to sustain it long term. The mandate has to happen, or something that brings in equal revenue, for it to work. The risk pool has to be made HUGE to cover everyone adequately, and furthermore, a new discipline of preventative care needs to being brought online to keep the healthy healthy, because the young are under the impression that they will never need health care. Which is BULLSHIT.

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Everyone needs health care eventually, unless you die as an infant.

        It makes me want to gag when I go to get my eyes checked and I go to a fake palazzo with fancy tiles and water fountains. I’d like to go back to the 1960s when you went to a threadbare waiting room, and the doctor owned his own practice, and you paid $20 for an office visit.

  • Doug Langley
    • Vecchioivan

      Looks more like a Chinese dumpling.

    • shaar dula

      related tangent. nothing as fancy but happy bellies all around. #1 decently well made batatas & cauliflower topped with peas, #2. ladies finger in tamarind & jaggery, #3. seasoned lentils for protein. served with fresh rotis and piping hot rice.

      • Doug Langley

        What? You gonna tell Saturn you’re a better cook than she is?

        • shaar dula

          hmm. no. just exhausted, drunk and pleased that a hungry junta liked a meal i made?

      • Up In Smoke O’hontas

        I’ll be right over! Can I bring mango ice cream?

  • Suse

    Spice Boy does an annoying thing when asked a question he doesn’t want to answer. Reporter asks question. Spicy says, “It’s not a question of blah, blah, blah, John. It’s a question of blah, blah, blah…”

  • IOnlyLikeCats

    Has anyone applied for a student visa before because I feel like I’m falling well short of the ability to convince them I should be allowed to get this degree and I’ll leave after I graduate.

    • RobKanC

      Maybe you can dress like a nerd in a Hollywood movie. That will convince them.

    • shaar dula

      how do you mean? me, missus and student visa where like menage-et trois -ing for a long long time.

      • IOnlyLikeCats

        I’m not sure, I read a whole bunch of samples but most of them were for graduate degrees, and I’m going for my bachelor’s. Also, it’s tricky to prove that I’ll leave because Future Mr. Cats is a citizen and only lives a few hours from the campus.

  • Jamoche

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/03/09/us/politics/trump-golf-courses.html?_r=0

    “The stars have all aligned,” Eric Trump, who as executive vice president of the Trump Organization oversees all its golf properties, said on Thursday morning, while sipping an iced tea at the restaurant inside the Trump International Hotel before appearing at a promotional event for the Memorial Day tournament. “I think our brand is the hottest it has ever been.”

    (Autoplay video with annoying music)

    • Villago Delenda Est
    • tapp_my_wire,please

      Hey Eric, google Margaret Truman for the paths of success for preznit’s kids.

    • shivaskeeper

      You know, I just posted a long thing on cultural filters downthread. How appropriate that the stars aligned for a Trump spawn. Since when someone tells me the stars are aligned I pictured dread Cthulhu waiting in his stone city for the stars to align so he can live again and destroy the world.

      • Amy!

        Eric Trump will be eaten last.

        • shivaskeeper

          Preferably first so I can see it happen before I end up consumed by his tentacled head.

        • georgiaburning

          Slowly

      • snark-lurker

        yer skirrin me

      • Anna Elizabeth

        That’s the theme of one of my favorite RolePlaying Games, “Delta Green”. It’s a modern, convspiracy-heay setting for “Call of Cthulhu”, but really, it’s that our modern world *is* when The Stars have Come Right, and we all live as the Old Ones lived.

    • Hutch

      Annoying. Well maybe not that annoying.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvdrwRs27hE

  • MynameisBlarney
  • Nounverb911
  • MynameisBlarney
    • mancityRed6
    • cmd resistor

      So this makes me somewhat nostalgic. My kid was into metal in high school, kind of a rebellion against whatever kids were listening to in those days. When he was too young to drive I would go with him to metal concerts. Figured if he was willing to be seen with his mom at such events, must be a good thing. I actually learned to like some of it, including my favorite line in a song: These four words might help, please go fuck yourself.

  • Nounverb911
  • Weevie

    Just wait a few months, the baby in the walker will be able to launch herself across the entire house at 80 mph and kneecap anyone not looking!
    What did the guy say, North South North South Korea something something?

    • snark-lurker

      kids are worse than pets

  • Nounverb911

    Kellyanne Conjob would like everyone to forget Alternate facts, don’t hold your breath.

    https://twitter.com/VanityFair/status/840368745264607233

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Yeah, go fuck yourself, you worthless Mercenary.

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      I would really like her and her cronies to stop ruining America. But sorry about your day, Kellyanne!

    • Apple Scruff

      Which is why we keep doing it. Sorry Kellyanne, it’s part of the vernacular and you’re stuck with it.

    • Doug Langley

      Sure – just as soon as you drop “her emails”.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Is she warding off death lasers or granting benediction?

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Bad salute to Hair Furor.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Boo, hoo, hoo.

      There. I’ve expressed the extent of my sympathy.

      • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

        I think you mean “Boo fucking hoo.” Much more sympathetic.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Most of the reply tweets to this I’ve seen are pretty much in the same vein as my initial reaction (see below)

    • mancityRed6

      “Just because I said it doesn’t mean you should take it literally!”

    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      I’M supposed to have “free speech,” NOT YOU! And sure we said we’re the party of accountability, but that OBVIOUSLY means for THOSE people, stupid!

    • Begin Anew Day

      I would like it very much if she DID HOLD HER BREATH. Her rack would protrude more. And she do do a lot less talking.

      yrs truly

      Donnie

    • Scrofula

      “C’mon lying fake news media, stop reminding me I’m a lying stooge for a treasonous fuckwad–I have to spend two hours every morning suppressing reality just to go to work.”

    • theCryptofishist

      You accidentally told the truth. and it was memorable.

  • sadboy

    Well, it may not have been perfect, but at least it’s not Fox And Friends.

  • Apple Scruff

    I’ve seen the video 4 times today on 4 different shows and I’m crying for the 4th time. It just gets better on repeat viewings.

    Women like Feminist Mole are why liberals cannot have all the nice things.

  • shaar dula

    alright all night night. i;m going to hit the sack. read a bit of something uplifting and see if i cannot steal a whole night’s sleep.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Have a good night! :) I recommend James Herriot’s “All Creatures” series, they are what I’ve been reading at night lately. :)

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Night. Hopefully you do not have a cat like mine who jumps on the bed just after you’ve nodded off…EVERY SINGLE TIME.

      • JMP

        Mine just likes to climb on us around 3 or 4 AM to wake us up and demand pets.

        • mancityRed6

          the little bastard scratches at the wall or the closet door starting at 2 am and every half hour after.
          the headboard makes a nice place to hang the squirt bottle.

    • shivaskeeper

      Night.

    • Scrofula

      I’ll loan you my upcoming night’s sleep; interest free.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    It irritates the shit out of me that Trump is inheriting such a good economy, just like GWB did, then everyone talks about how great they were for the economy.

    “If any number of factors had turned out differently, from Comey to WikiLeaks, people would be talking about the Obama-Clinton boom. The evaluations of his economic record that are able to account for all the data will yield conclusions far more favorable than most people afforded Obama at the time. In the meantime, the political credit will accrue to the president who inherited an economy humming along at low unemployment.

    Obama’s economic policies may wind up helping Trump after all. But if they do, it will not be because they helped get Trump elected, but because they helped him get reelected.”

    http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/03/obamas-economy-didnt-elect-trump-but-it-might-reelect-him.html

    • snark-lurker

      that’s an awful thought

    • mancityRed6

      remember when they were upset about the whole “you didn’t build that”?

      • Vagenda and Pee-ara

        Another line they took out of context.

        It’s hilarious that Trump now believes the unemployment numbers are real, when they were “fake” two months ago.

        • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

          Wait till they actually start reflecting his shit policies, as opposed to still reflecting Obama’s, then they’ll be “fake” again.

        • tapp_my_wire,please

          Interpreting complete sentences is hard.

        • mancityRed6

          they’ve been “fake” for the last 8 years, but now they’re good.
          yeah, yeah.
          jeebus these people make me want to test the strength of my steel toe boots.

    • Weevie

      every time D’s win, that happens, then R’s destroy it.

      Doggie1 looks all over and finds a ball, Doggie 2 takes it and eats it. Doggie 1 cleans up the shit and somehow assembles a new ball. Rewind and replay.

    • CripesAmighty

      The bigger the bubble, the more violent the crash. S&P P/E ratio at 24. Nearing dot-bomb pre-bust levels. Prolly won’t be too long.

  • Hutch

    Cool, Rebecca. I was actually creeped out by this video. The poor nanny/wife/whatever looking scared when the kids did what kids do. And they were in trouble. Excellent take!

    • ltmcdies

      they looked like every parent with a kid throwing a screaming tantrum in aisle 3 at Walmart.

  • Rick Hill

    Anyone else think that, with the new likelihood of complete corporate control of our lives, that your credit score will reflect how much you spend and interest payments you make? If you’re frugal or pay everything on time you will be placed in a for profit prison, so you may do your part to support the system.

    • Hutch

      I say we go totally feral and start, you know, complaining.

      • Rick Hill

        Complainers go to solitary

        • Hutch

          Mum’s the word.

    • snark-lurker

      have you gone one toke over the line again

      • Courser_Resistance

        I’m one toke over line ALL the fucking time!

        • Hutch

          God, I wish I were.

    • Scrofula

      Rumor for a while has been that your score goes down if you never carry a balance.
      I mean, interest payments are how they make their money (and fees).

      • Thiazin red

        I’m pretty sure thats total horse shit. It goes down if you have no credit, but paying your bills in full and on time raises your score.

        • Scrofula

          Yeah, but the best customers maintain a balance that they make large payments into on time every month.
          Think about renting a place or getting a car loan. They want to see a history of you making payments on time, with interest, not buying one thing and paying it off.
          I mean,I have no idea, but it makes sense.

  • Nounverb911
    • CatCafe #ShePurrsisted

      Of course! “People” don’t get pregnant, just those icky “other” humanoids that everyone knows aren’t really people.

      • Liberal Fascist Ron

        Yup. If they were real people they’d have ‘Inc.’ after their names.

    • mackafritz

      How about we get insurance that covers nothing? Will that satisfy them?

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        We just pay those companies for absolutely nothing. Yep…that’s what they’re aiming for.

        • Hutch

          Like when Arm and Hammer told us to buy baking soda and “just pour it down the drain!” To clean drains!

          • Doug Langley

            You know the ad exec really earned his salary on that one.

        • Weevie

          That’s what I’m doing with the kooky deductible we have.

        • Doug Langley
      • CripesAmighty

        Only if we have to pay $10,000 a month for it.

        Edit: Oops, said below.

      • georgiaburning

        Once it covers nothing, they will support mandated coverage

    • Ms.MLG on Maui

      God, the pro-lifeness of it all!

    • Rick Hill

      They’re going to nickel and dime every aspect of our society(regardless of whether or not it actually costs more in the long run) but when it comes to their follies, the wall, the military, then nothing’s too expensive

      • Wild Cat

        Everything will be privatized. Adios, Post Office—shame on you for giving lowly Blahs jobs.
        The military serves two purposes: They WILL eventually engage in war. It’s also so easy to steal from the Pentagon via graft and war profiteering, which to most American Morons is as holy as Mecca. No one will investigate. Cheney & Co. grifted billions and they’ve yet to be investigated.
        And we’re giving them permission to do this.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Wait…Glenn Greenwald’s “Intercept” finally found something bad to say about the GOP? Or have I misinterpreted, and Greenwald actually thinks prenatal care coverage is a bad thing?

      • ltmcdies

        Glenn….since I live in Ecuador little Trump does can hurt me…Greenwald can take his sudden realization that others will be hurt and stick it where the sun don’t shine.

        Honestly…what did Glenn and his bros think was going to happen

        • Wild Cat

          Doesn’t that pornography producer GG live in Brazil?

          • Left Coast Tom

            Last I understood he does – I’m remembering him saying that with the SC recognizing same sex marriage he could live in the US, but I’m not remembering him actually moving.

          • Wild Cat

            His partner is Brazilian; he left the US to live in Brazil before THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY legalized gay marriage.
            He’s an ungrateful twerp.

          • Left Coast Tom

            Yes.

      • Methinks Glen realizes that all his stumping and russian playing has netted him the unfavorable reputation of being a stooge.
        It’s only because he is one.

        • Left Coast Tom

          Agreed.

          Any chance the Progressiver-than-Thou crowd will notice their hero is a stooge?

    • Anna Elizabeth

      It’s almost like the GOP actually hate every person and everything, and want it all to collapse.

      • mackafritz

        They don’t hate corporations or billionaires.

      • Begin Anew Day

        It isn’t “like” it.

        It IS “the GOP actually hate every person and everything, and want it all to collapse.”

        • Anna Elizabeth

          Yeah, I actually think it might be tied to apocalyptic thinking/religious indoctrination and the knowledge that the American Empire is in rapid, irreversible decline.

          • HogeyeGrex

            My money’s on “It’s a fuck ton easier to pick people’s pockets when they’re freaking out over their society collapsing.”

            Ergo-
            1) Collapse society.
            2)
            3) Profit!!!

          • Anna Elizabeth

            I think you’ve got something there….

    • Now we know the actual mandates the GOP didn’t like- the ones telling insurance companies that they had to cover people.
      Hence the big 30% increase if you drop insurance instead of a penalty- end up costing people who drop insurance up to 10x what the penalty cost.

    • Doug Langley

      Let me see if I have this straight. You can’t get an abortion to terminate the fetus, and you can’t get the care to make it survive? Makes perfect sense.

      • Amy!

        An impoverished, starving, homeless worker is a desperate worker. Much more willing to negotiate, yanowutimean?

        • HogeyeGrex

          It’s all about cheap labor.
          Never mind that all these broke ass sonzabitches can’t buy anything to keep the economy going, they’ll work for nothing!

      • Don’t ferget, no slut pills to make sure you do not get preggo either!

      • SeekingResistanceBarbie

        And you can’t get the birth control to prevent it, either. I swear the Republicans would be happy to exclude women entirely from insurance coverage.

        • Most men and children too.
          Insurance should just be for those who can afford it. That way the rich do not have to wait an hour to see a doctor because some damn poor people are monopolizing his or her time

          • HogeyeGrex

            Like bank loans, should only be available to those who don’t need them.

    • TJ Barke

      These fucking motherfuckers…

  • Weevie

    Here are some gubmit guys laughing like hell after they slipped in a bill allowing employers to do genetic testing to decide whether to give discounts on insurance, via. wellness programs.
    They say your coach will review it and keep it private. Last coach I had was “Suzie,” we talked weekly so I could get a big discount. Suzie called my home once and left a message. My wife yelled at me, “She’s hot for you!!!!” Anyone want a Suzie in their genes?
    http://blogs.plos.org/dnascience/2017/03/09/saving-gina-is-genetic-privacy-imperiled/
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/20e8cbf5e7130ed0b10e986db1b0f0619ece550b5ceda66650524a0a81957b7c.jpg

  • Weevie

    Here it is, you’ll never understand it. I don’t.
    https://www.congress.gov/bill/115th-congress/house-bill/1313/text

    • Liberal Fascist Ron

      It’s gibberish to me, but I assume that since it’s been introduced by Rs that somewhere buried inside it is a poison pill the size of a house.

      • Weevie
        • You can volunteer your employees, but the insurance companies cannot demand employers volunteer their employees

        • Amy!

          Huh. Summary: already in ACA; changes are to the amount of rebate, not to whether it can be required or not.

          Which also explains why my insurance company keeps trying to get me enrolled in their stupid “wellness” programs.

          • Weevie

            Currently, you can’t set premiums or group rates based on genetic info per 110-233, Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act of 2008.

            HR 1313 sec 3b redefines 110-233 sect 201 to make genetic testing acceptable
            “…the collection of information about the manifested disease or disorder
            of a family member shall not be considered an unlawful acquisition of
            genetic information with respect to another family member as part of a
            workplace wellness program…”

            I’ve always participated in a wellness program because it’s no big deal to me, I’m very athletic and the discount is big. Use of genetic info to treat a disease or whatever that I may have is OK, but testing 4 degrees of separation between myself and relatives is extreme and not the intent at all of 110-233.

          • Amy!

            Interesting. That’s not what the linked snopes article seems to suggest. It seems to say that while the companies can’t set rates, they can give discounts (which strikes me as a distinction without a difference), and they do so, for current voluntary wellness programs that may have genetic analysis components. I may have misread it (but I’m not gonna go reread).

            As for wellness programs, those people aren’t doctors, I don’t want to tell them shit about my life, and fuck them very much. I’m deeply suspicious of insurance companies offering me free advice on my health; I can’t help but think (for some reason) that there’s a profit motive involved, rather than the professional interest in keeping me healthy that I expect from medical pros.

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Ah, gotcha. The pill is that the programs are ‘voluntary,’ and participants ‘may’ get some relief on their insurance payments. Scare quotes and all.

  • CripesAmighty

    With all due respect to the wonderful wits and wags of the wonkets–Sorry, That. Is. The. Funniest. Thing. I’ve. Ever. Seen. (With the possible exception of the following book title: ‘The Sexual Politics Of Meat: A Feminist-Vegetatian Critical Theory’).

  • katkelly57

    A technicolor spew by either child, woulda been the cherry on top.
    He deserved that at the very least.

  • Sardonicuss

    Lastly ..and most schadenfreude-ly (not a word)
    ….a neighbor and Drmp voter dropped by earlier to show me his new Medicaid card. Then he looked at my t.v. screen (which is also my browser screen). I didn’t have to do anything. How weird is the universe?
    Good times…
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e595cca0e649c64b25e33ea133cce03c7598bded50ef108bd6091c1d1527e0bd.jpg

  • SeekingResistanceBarbie

    How can people be so ignorant to think that because they are healthy, they don’t need insurance? We need insurance because shit happens. About 10 years ago I (a healthy person) ended up in the hospital with a flesh-eating bacterial infection that required 4 surgeries to cut it out of my leg, followed by a skin graft. I was in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and on IV morphine and super-antibiotic the entire time. The bills–without insurance–totaled at least $150K, if not more, but I was covered by a very good employer-provided plan and was only out of pocket a couple of thousand. Without the insurance, I would have had to declare bankruptcy. And because of the position I held, I didn’t lose my job; not everyone can be out of work for weeks for health reasons and keep their jobs.

    • The GOP is telling them (and has for years now!) that they can get it when they need it and save their money otherwise.
      And that they should only pay for what they want, like say broken bones but not carpal tunnel syndrom because insurance works like that (it DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT. Men do NOT pay for “prenatal” care because they do not haz prenatal needs- some of their premiums might go for someone else’;s, but guess what, that mom’s premiums later go to his hair replacement!)
      And they are falling for it. Because they are dumb.

    • Hutch

      When I started working when I was 16, I was mad the govment was taking my money out of my check. My very Republican dad explained that that kept America Great. I believed him. Not a good argument anymore I guess. Raise taxes again on the robber barons!

      (Sorry, I’m inebriated.)

      • Your very Republican dad was correct. It is patriotic as FUCK to pay your taxes. Next to serving in the military or civil service, it is the most patriotic thing you can do- and the only patriotic act of personal sacrifice those who do not serve can actually do. Namely, you do not want to serve so you pay for your country with your money.

        • Hutch

          Oh, you know! He did that, too! Serve in the military! Gives folks perspective. “Ask what you can do for your country.”

          • We seem to have forgotten this in the country. It is all “How much can I get and all for me” anymore :/

          • theCryptofishist

            I blame Ayn RAnd and all the other libertarians and that awful guy from Chicago who was Reagan’s economist and all those people who told us, over and over, that if everyone acted in their own interests that magical invisible hand would make sure that we all got what we deserved, They were lieing to us, so they could grab more and we’d think they weren’t selfish psycho bastards. And now they have control of the country.

          • Liberal Fascist Ron

            JFK’s little speech would be greeted with loud derision these days.

          • Hutch

            As my 14-year old Italian Greyhound would say when he walks up to a cute cocker spaniel: Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side?

            (I said I was inbrietated And female.)

    • theCryptofishist

      I don’t even know how I could have paid back half a million dollars.

  • So, this is why I lock myself in my room on the rare occasions that I have to Skype with a client. (My kids are bigger, but that doesn’t actually help. They still barge in all the time.)

    I dunno, though, I think feminist has a point. If that were a woman, the discussion probably would be “Pundit Mom Interrupted by Kids: Terrible, Selfish Mother, or Terrible, Selfish Workaholic Mother?” Women really do get defined as mom/wife/sex object first, and everything else last (or not at all. See: Amal Clooney gives speech at U.N., Time headlines it as “Amal Clooney shows off baby bump at U.N.” Jeebus.)

    Still a funny video, though. And as a work-at-home parent, I’m even sympathetic, because yeah, kids do that shit. Get a door lock, dude.

    • Agreed. Though to blame this poor singular fellow for all the ills women face is kinda over the top XD
      But yeah, if it were a woman the journalism person would have stopped the interview to ask her how hard it was to weigh kids and werks and called for them all to get in frame

      • Oh, yeah, I don’t think it’s pundit guy’s fault. I actually didn’t see “easy reassurance” in that arm move, either — I saw, “shit, what can I do here and still look professional?” (although that could just be me projecting — that’s about what I’d be thinking.) But dude was working. That’s fine. I just think the conversation would be completely different and less about how funny it all was if he were a woman, which is not really any one person’s fault, but still frustrating.

        • Very XD I think what Rebecca is saying though, or to me anyway, is that sometimes a hat is just a hat and maybe the reason feminists get blasted is because so many things that are not are taken as a personal assault.
          Maybe if woman it woulda been different? Maybe not? It was not woman so the musing itself is immaterial sort of thing.

  • Vagenda and Pee-ara

    I’ve been thinking about it, and I want a refund on my insurance premiums. I’ve been paying insurance for thirty five years, and I’ve gotten NOTHING in return, except that I’ve gotten to pay for a bunch of old and/or sick people. Now that I’m old, I need my money back. This is how insurance should work!

  • Doug Langley

    Bit of good news. Went to HR Block today and turns out that after paying them, I’m getting over $700 in refund. Which I badly need.

    • GOOD!

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Great news! :)

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Mrs Itt and I were there last night. Money well spent. We got 5K back. Itemize, if you can.

      • Doug Langley

        I leave all that in the hands of my agent, who has 30 years experience in this.

  • Anna Elizabeth
    • Natasha yay!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        If I can get my hernia fixed before the GOP destroys healthcare, and the rate I’m losing weight, I hope to do Black Widow as my Halloween costume this year. :)

        • I want Pics, ALL OF EM.
          I could never do a Natasha. Most I could do is a plucky Mashka, her plucky chubby friend who gets killed in the third panel of the comic.

          • Anna Elizabeth

            You bet! :) I’ve been wearing black pleather leggings and knee-high boots lately, that always draws attention. I already have a wig much like her hairstyle from “Avengers”, if I can trim my tummy, I think I can pull it off.

          • Got plenty of time, bet you can do it!

    • Weevie

      My kid’s favorite girlfriend!

      • Anna Elizabeth

        Mine as well. Scarlett Johannson is my dream girlfriend: Beautiful, sexy, feisty, and smart as Hell.

    • Thiazin red

      Since Marvel refuses to make a Black Widow movie for some reason, the director of John Wick made a cool looking female cold war spy movie with Charlize Theron instead. http://io9.gizmodo.com/charlize-theron-plays-a-cold-war-super-spy-in-atomic-bl-1793173154

      • Anna Elizabeth

        OOOh, Charlize is awesome, and this looks like a lot of fun!

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Friday Night Videos has returned. Currently most played on Vladimir Putin’s iPod.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVWfqOSdzs4

  • FDRliberal

    Haw, haw, haw, how fucking funny. The scumbag currently fouling the White House lied and lied and lied for all of 2016 about Obama-era jobs reports. And when Spicer admitted it today, the press laughed.

    Putting aside James Comey and Trump campaign operatives colluding with Russia, one of the reasons this repellent asshole is in the White House is because the giggling idiots in the press normalized Trump. They gave him thousands of hours of free advertising, broadcasting his Bund Rallies with no commentary and equating his unmatched corruption with the nontroversy of Clinton’s emails.

    I’m not fucking laughing. Resist.

    https://twitter.com/BuzzFeedNews/status/840351533841633280

  • Rick Hill

    One thing that’s starting to get worrisome, now. Everyone’s heard of Murphy’s law but the thing that’s really going to affect everyone is Cole’s law.

    • theCryptofishist

      It’s a cabbage thing.

      • Doug Langley

        You have a real head for this sort of thing.

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Can we leaf the puns alone for one night? Have a heart!

          • Can’t stop the puns. Might wanna go take a napa

          • Doug Langley

            It’s becoming a real wedge issue.

          • Rick Hill

            You guys are starting to grate on me

  • mancityRed6
    • snark-lurker

      those eyes…

      • snark-lurker

        THOSE EYES!!11!

        • HazooToo

          Maybe she’s born with it…

      • mancityRed6

        she has serious resting cat face

        • snark-lurker

          Ha! she haz yoo fooled but not me-he-he-he

    • It’s like she wants to kill me. So, cat

      • mancityRed6

        not personally, she’s just from a council estate

        • Then she should be running off with guy who has big ears and a phone box

          • mancityRed6

            some nights there’s just no telling where she goes off to.

          • Then why hasn’t she killed Hitler or Trumps’ parents?

          • mancityRed6

            she tells me the alternatives are way worse.
            we never get President Camacho

    • Sardonicuss

      I own you ..humaan….

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        OK. Chicken and tuna or chicken and polar bear tonight, snookums?

        • Sardonicuss

          ………and if you could not..steal my breath in my sleep..that would be really cool. Ummkay?

          • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

            So my mother related to me in the early 60s after my baby brother was born and our cat would hang around his crib.

          • 60’s nothing. My one brother like 6 years ago had to give up his cat because his wife thought it might smother the baby. Because she read about it on the internets.

          • Sardonicuss

            I had a cat that slept between my feet all the time..so if I rolled over, he was on the blanket. And if I reached down to pet him to ease the disturbance..would bite me.
            If I slept on my back, he would eventually come up and settle down with his face like two inches from my face.
            Totally trying to steal my breath and shit…..
            Sneaky bastard.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      We can count on the snark level increasing. NOBODY can outsnark a cat. PERIOD!

      • mancityRed6

        neither of them have much of a sense of humor, trust me, I’ve tried

  • Scrofula

    You know how in a lot of commercials for household goods like breakfast food or cleaning supplies, you often see a totally hapless Dad and chaotic children destroying the house, only for Mom to rescue them all with a wipe of Clorox and a Bounty paper towel? This is hapless Dad. And Rescue Mom.
    (I just wanted to add that whole view of gender diff. in the home for any feminism talk.)

  • Ms.MLG on Maui

    It’s time for me to go doll up, ’cause I sure as hell ain’t having Eddie Izzard out-dress me tonight. Happy Friday, Wonketeers. Have a good weekend!

    • WomanInThePersistence

      Not jealous. Not jealous at all.

      • Speak for yourself. It’s freezing and windy and snowy here

        • WomanInThePersistence

          There might have been the tiniest bit of sarcasm in my earlier remark. Shocking, I know.

          • Sarcasams? At teh Wonkette? *clutches pearls and faints*

          • WomanInThePersistence

            Let me see if I can find a couch for you to gracefully fall on.

          • SeekingResistanceBarbie

            Pft. Pearl-clutchers don’t fall. They wilt.

          • snark-lurker

            and they never hit the floor

        • Liberal Fascist Ron

          Isn’t it? I find myself longing for the warm zephyrs and gentle rains of February.

    • Anna Elizabeth

      Enjoy, Darlin’! :D

    • snark-lurker

      donut forget pants

      • Jonny On Maui

        Spoilsport…

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      Eddie can be serious competition no matter which way he goes. Best.

    • Enjoy, MLG :huggles: When come back, bring pie

      • Jonny On Maui

        If there’s any left… :-)

        • That is why I asked her. I figured YOU would bogart it all.
          Enjoy, Jonny!

          • Jonny On Maui

            hehehe

      • Ms.MLG on Maui

        Saw a place called Maui Pie the other day. Will be going there soon.