Tag: tony perkins

OK, maybe not a room at the State Department...

Vladimir Putin Picks Exxon CEO Rex Tillerson For Secretary Of State, Trump Agrees

Donald Trump's choice for secretary of State appears to be just another Russian hack.

OIL! It’s Got What Plants Crave! Wonkagenda For Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Donald Trump cancels a press conference, Congress crooks face jail time, and Jill Stein is still a embarrassing failure. Your daily news brief!
Just look up 'Backpfeifengesicht'

Guy Who Loved Uganda’s ‘Kill The Gays’ Bill Cannot BELIEVE How Narrow-Minded Liberals Are!

Maybe he'd be comfortable with a more familiar term, like 'abomination.'

God Must Have Forgot To Tell Tony Perkins To Build An Ark For Latest Great Flood

Leading religious right bigot loses home in Baton Rouge flooding, and you know what? We are very sorry that happened.

Washington Post Says Trump Teaching GOP To Love The Gays, LOL Shut Up, Washington Post

How weird, since Trump is addressing an INSANE anti-gay summit this week!

Hip-And-With-It GOP Platform Yells At Clouds, Gay People, And Sage Grouses

Way to get with the times, Republicans!

Utah Republican Wishes Porn Would Stop Forcing Utah Republican To Watch Porn

Know those hilarious statistics that say the most sexxx porn is watched by residents of the most conservative states, like Utah? We're not a social scientist, but we'd guess it has something to do with how if something is intensely condemned by...
The Yoogest Story Ever Told

Donald Trump Needs Jesus, Dammit

<a href="http://wonkette.com/593464/sarah-palin-knows-donald-trumps-favorite-bible-verse-is-all-of-them-katie"></a>One of the best things about this stupid Republican primary has been Donald J. Trump the New York Values thrice-marryer trying to convince wingnut Christians he's actually one of them. He LOVES going to church and partaking of the wine...

Louie Gohmert Would Have Gotten A Stiffie And Here’s Why

Texas Republican Congressman Louie Gohmert doesn't have an erection right now. (Unless he does.) But Louie Gohmert gets boners sometimes, and he knows sometimes there need to be laws, to protect people from his boners. He explained this to...
BYE YOU DUGGAR-LOVIN' MOTHERFUCKER

Dearest Mike Huckabee: So Long, Farewell, Aufwiedersehen, Burn In Hell

By now, you may have heard the saddest news ever to come out of the big dumbocrap whatchamahoozit known as the Iowa caucuses: Mike Huckabee will no longer be pretending to "run for president," and will instead have to...
PFFFFFT JESUS.

Sarah Palin Would Never Judge You For Not Loving Jesus, As Long As You’re Donald Trump

Oh ho ho ho ho, you want to eat a fried moose sandwich with OMG hypocrisy sauce for breakfast this morning, the day of the big Iowa caucuses? Sarah Palin, whose latest grift (except for this one) is writing...
Cocktail hour.

Moron Todd Starnes Says Moron Todd Starnes Is Moron

Suspected pee enthusiast and Fox News shouty mad face Todd Starnes is having a confuse! You see, the other day Donald Trump talked Jesus words to the virginal students of Liberty University, and he Bibled wrong, because he said...
The Yoogest Story Ever Told

Southern Baptist Leader Calls Donald Trump Filthy Slutty Gambling Glutton Whore

Oh bother! The evangelicals are getting itchy in their Underoos again, what with the cognitive dissonance of Donald Trump -- who does all the seven deadly sins before breakfast, including the one about wanting to fuck his daughter -- being the frontrunner for...

Donald Trump Terrific At Saying Classiest Bible Verses Almost Perfectly

As per the ancient Martin Luther King Day tradition -- no, not the one where Republicans Tweeterspace about how they woulda been total brahs with Dr. King if they were borneded when he was alive -- Donald J. Trump has...
Huck would like to bitch and moan some more please.

Mike Huckabee Hates The Religious Right And Wishes It Were Dead

Mike Huckabee's river of leaking butthurt continues to flood across America. Hope you're wearing your parka and your galoshes! He's really upset because nobody loves him, even after he's done SO MUCH to lick the areolas of the establishment religious right....
A power bottom for your gay love, and also your dollars.

Does Ted Cruz Secretly Want To Gay Marry The Homosexuals?

BREAKING NEWS, EVERYONE. Ted Cruz, a politician from Texas, is a politician, and he is from Texas. (And Canada. And Cuba.) Yes, we know, everybody thinks he's this Pure Conservative Social Warrior, untainted by the taint smells of politickin', but...