Wonkette

Barack Obama wants to leave Iraq, John McCain wants to keep it as a vacation home for 100 years. This is an important decision we must make in our Election. Except it’s not at all(!), because — according to a British newspaper — George W. Bush & Pals are negotiating a Secret Deal that “would perpetuate the American military occupation of Iraq indefinitely, regardless of the outcome of the US presidential election in November.” Shocking! And once this deal is inked, Bush plans on declaring victory. Again! MORE »

SEE WHAT EVERYONE’S SAYING ABOUT SCOTT MCCLELLAN’S NEW #1 BOOK, GEORGE BUSH JR. MADE VAGUE ERRORS!

“I would think if he harbored such deep feelings about things he wouldn’t have and shouldn’t have accepted the press secretary job in the first place.” — ARI FLEISCHER, bald press secretary before Scott McClellan.
“Total crap.” — DAN BARTLETT, former White House communications director.
“Left-wing logger.” — KARL ROVE, White House turd blossom.
“I totally agree.” — NANCY PELOSI, known Liberal.
“Why don’t you learn something about the monument.” — HILLARY CLINTON, civil rights leader.

WHAT A BOOK! (Now let us never speak of it again.)

Four years ago, George W. Bush bravely stood on a boat anchored in San Diego and boldly declared victory in Iraq. The funny thing is that if the troops had been brought home that day, he could still be declaring victory in Iraq. MORE »

Learn all about it, plus the usual screwups at the tree-lighting ceremony, after the jump.

MORE »

• Through his lawyer, Foley outs himself, blames childhood abuse and booze for his urges. Bush, Mehlman condemn him, support Hastert. [WP, NYT, LAT]

• Which means Hastert won’t have to give up Speaker’s office ’til after the election, maybe. [NYT, WSJ]
• Pagefuckergate story-breaker Brian Ross talks to the WSJ, debunks Hastert-Harris “democratic conspiracy” theory. [W$J]
• Yearly North Korean nuclear test threats resurface, this time maybe for real. [WP]
• Bush was at his “King Learish” best yesterday in California where he broke his own fundraising record, and had fun blasting Democrats while doing it. [WP]
• Congress has $20M stashed in a mattress to pay for “a celebration in the nation’s capital ‘for commemoration of success’ in Iraq and Afghanistan.” [NYT]
• American population to reach 300 Million people sometime next week. [LAT]
• Dow Jones market index sets new all time high. [WP, NYT]
• Hillary Clinton appears at an Alexandria fundraiser for Webb, calls Allen a “subservient Republican.” [WP]

* We hope Neil Young will remember some words that rhyme with “war” besides “door.” [Brooklyn Vegan] MORE »