Tag: mexicans

Donald Trump’s Mouthbreathing Supporters Will Burn This Mofo DOWN!

When Donald Trump sends his rage-fueled idiot-ass supporters to the Republican National Convention, he's not sending the best America has to offer. He's sending bitter, dumbass white people who are convinced they're only dead-end losers because The Blacks and The Mexicans took something...

President Obama ‘Bout To Run Victory Laps On Your Face! Your State Of The Union Preview.

Oh gosh, everyone, get ready to shed a single tear down your face, for tonight (Tuesday), Barack Obama will do the State Of The Kenyan Muslim Gay Usurper Union Address for the very last time! Oh no, we are...

Rep. Steve King Wants To Know Why His Muslim Colleagues Hate America

Ah, Steve King. The pride of Iowa. Lover of rape babies, hater of puppies. How we haven't missed you one tiny little bit. And yet here you are, catching that nasty case of Trump that's going around. King hit the pause button,...
Just a man who loves his country

It’s Only Fair To Ask: Is Donald Trump Working For ISIS?

Donald Trump is already making us nostalgic for those innocent early days of his campaign, when he mostly came across as a buffoon bent on wrecking the Republican Party. He was so good at it that he had to...
Time for another history lesson

Donald Trump Says No Muslims Allowed, ‘Christians Only’ Republicans Appalled

In addition to shutting down mosques (that's so October) and tracking every Muslim (that's so Sunday), President Donald Trump is gonna straight-up flat-out ban all Muslims from setting one Muslimy toe on the shores of his Great-Again America, right in their Muslim faces: Donald J....
Genius.

Iowa Republican Would Like To Murder Some Foreigns If That’s All Right

Let's troll through the fever swamps of aspiring Republican politicians, shall we? Oh hello, kind Republican state Sen. Mark Chelgren of southeast Iowa, what do you have on your mind? State Sen. Mark Chelgren, a southeast Iowa Republican who is...
Muy caliente!

Playboy Will Still Make Naked Ladies For You, But Only In Mexican

The other day, the world was shocked-but-not-really to find out that Playboy, the iconic magazine known mostly for hard-hitting journalism and the occasional picture of a booby, would be getting rid of the boobies entirely and going to a boner-free...
Fuck that dumb flag.

Confederate Flag-Humpers Indicted Just For Threatening To Kill Black Children

We can only imagine, as a verified Southern, what it must feel like to be a really shitty, confederate flag-loving moron who can't even manage to finish rubbing his privates against the trailer park's communal sex goat before he hears...
He was only wearing it for a costume, he swears.

Jeb Bush Tells His Beloved Hispanic Culture To Go Back To Mexico

Jeb J.E.B. el Bush, which foot have you sticked up your ass, pulled out, and then rammed down your throat now? Was it your American voter foot, or your Hispanic voter foot? Alas and Ay Dios mio, the answer is both. Here...
This screengrab is so mean, but why not?

John Kasich: Don’t Worry, I Leave Mexican Doctors A Little Tip Too!

Republican presidential candidate John "The Moderate One" Kasich raised the ire of yr Wonkette, and also probably all Latino voters who ever lived, by asserting last week that, unlike that Donald Trump character, he cherishes the Mexican Spanishes: “A lot of...
WHO ME?

No, Donald Trump Did Not Tell That Dumbass He’s Going To Kill All The Muslims

OK, internet, we're going to #slatepitch you for the second time in as many days, and you're going to like it, because Wonkette is right about all the things. The liberals on the computers are currently freaking out over...

Donald Trump Is The Greatest Constitutional Scholar, He Is Really Terrific

Hey, you know how Donald Trump is really, really, super and terrifically dumb? Well, funny story: BOY HOWDY IS DONALD TRUMP STUPID. You know how he always has moron "experts" who tell him things like Obama is definitely a...
The blouse really complements her derp.

Sarah Palin Likes Her Men Dumb And Drunk, Like Donald Trump

Sarah Palin loves Donald Trump, because he's a BIG PICTURE, Joe Six-Pack kind of pompous billionaire asshole HERO, who doesn't get mired down in little details like "policy" and "actual opinions" about stuff and things. And you know how...
You know, if you're not doing anything else that night LOL

Donald Trump And Nine Other Losers Walk Into A Bar: Your Wonkette Debate Preview!

It's almost here, everyone, it's almost here! The moment we have all been waiting for (kind of!) comes Thursday night, when the top ten Republican candidates, as chosen by Fox News Science, will show us their junk on live...

Donald Trump Knows Climate Change Is Just Classy, Luxurious Version Of Weather

Donald Trump would build a YOOOOOOOGE fence around climate change, if it even existed:“The real climate change is going to be nuclear climate change if we’re not smart and tough and very, very careful because that’s a big danger...