Dispatches from the shitshow-iest shitshow ever to shit all over the White House!
Everything's fine, America. Juuuuuuuuuust fine.
Another mass school shooting, Grassley says the coverup part out loud, and Dreamers are hanging on the edge of forever. Your morning news brief.
Dianne Feinstein is real fuckin' tired of Chuck Grassley and Lindsey Graham obstructing justice for Trump in the Russia investigation.
Trump budget rips apart the social safety net, Betsy DeVos tells trans kids to go outside, and Darrell Issa might be banging some other Congressman's wife? Your morning news brief.
Maybe he can go live in the Big Brother house with Omarosa.
ANOTHER government shutdown, Russian hookers, MORE secret memos, and Caligula Orgies. Your morning news brief!
Make La Migra an actual spy agency? What could possibly go wrong?
Nancy Pelosi kicks all sorts of ass (in heels), Congress tries to avert another shutdown, and San Diego Rep. Duncan Hunter is in BIG TROUBLE MISTER, for which he's blaming his wife. Your morning news brief.
HANNITY'S SHOW GONNA BE LIT TONIGHT, Y'ALL!
Devin Nunes is going to waste America's time some more. Here's your primer on what he's going to waste it with!
Can Devin Nunes actually read? UNCLEAR.
Democrats write their own memo, the markets are in a nose dive, and Hannity blames Obama for all the bad things. Your morning news brief.
YOU COME READ YOUR TOP TEN STORIES RIGHT NOW!
In no way is this list exhaustive.