Tag Archives: erick erickson

  U r pathetic

You Really Hurt Giant Pussy Erick Erickson’s Feelings, You Jerks

Sticks and stones yadda yadda Who knew RedState editor and Fox News contributor Erick Erickson, son of himself, was such a giant pussy? Oh, sorry, we mean such a “insert euphemism of choice related to the female reproductive system”? Turns out, though, he is, and now he wants the entire genre of impotent gap-toothed subliterate conservative slash fic to “recalibrate”: Read more on You Really Hurt Giant Pussy Erick Erickson’s Feelings, You Jerks…
  We Now Return You To Your Regularly Scheduled Programming

Great Feminist Blog RedState Says Hillary Clinton Is An Ugly Ho

Talk to the hand, and also YOUR MOM Once upon a time, there was a guy with with a real dumb redundant name that is dumb, and for an entire millisecond, he fancied himself a great defender of womenfolk and decency. And fellow feminist icon Jeb! Bush declared him to be “on the side of women,” so it must be true. Read more on Great Feminist Blog RedState Says Hillary Clinton Is An Ugly Ho…
  Case Settled

Megyn Kelly Joked About Her Husband’s Dick One Time, So Donald Trump Wins Forever

Loser You know how Fox News “journalist” Megyn Kelly was probably bleeding from her V-word, and that’s why she was such a B-word to Donald Trump during the Republican debate? (Or maybe not, and Donald Trump is a rude sexist sexismer. Or maybe Kelly is the real sexist and should apologize to Trump. Or maybe Jeb! Bush is the real sexist. Or maybe you are the real sexist, and also a Nazi. Any of these things are possible!) Read more on Megyn Kelly Joked About Her Husband’s Dick One Time, So Donald Trump Wins Forever…
  LISTEN UP ASSHOLES

Bristol Palin Takes Break From ISIS Battle To Slob Trump’s Knob

Bristol is here with the final word on ALL THIS BUSINESS.
Bristol is here with the final word on ALL THIS BUSINESS. Attention, everyone, for Our Lady Of However Many Immaculate Conceptions, Bristol Palin, has taken to the blogotubes to discuss how the media is doing all the liberal censorship crimes to our prince and Palin family hero Donald Trump, just because he said Megyn Kelly did a bad job moderating that debate due to profuse bleeding from her “wherever.” It’s a bad situation because, for one thing, Bristol is way too busy to be commenting on such things, but WHEN HER NATION CALLS, she answers. Today, we will be discussing “decency,” or Bristol’s concept of it at least. Take it away, Mama Morals: Read more on Bristol Palin Takes Break From ISIS Battle To Slob Trump’s Knob…
  Someone stop the bleeding

If You Think Donald Trump Said Megyn Kelly Was Bleeding From Her Hoo-Ha, You’re A Nazi

Jeffrey Lord, apparently OK, folks, we can all go home now, because we have reached the penultimate* plu-perfect** fucktasm of stupid on Aunt Flo-gate. You know, the Very Serious Matter of whether Fox News word-speaker Megyn Kelly was a girl dick to Donald Trump during the GOP debate, for asking him why he’s such a sexist boy dick, because her va-jay-jay was on the rag; or whether she is just a big dumb stupid, and only a pervert would think Trump was talking about her lady whatsit when he said she was “bleeding from her wherever” because he obviously meant her NOSE, you sick losers; or whether she was asking inappropriate questions and should be YOU’RE FIRED! from Fox and apologize to Trump; or whether it’s time for us to start drinking. Read more on If You Think Donald Trump Said Megyn Kelly Was Bleeding From Her Hoo-Ha, You’re A Nazi…
  Who's the REAL sexist Megyn?

Donald Trump Pretty Sure Bleeder Megyn Kelly Is The One Who Should Say Sorry

The true face of feminism.
The true face of feminism. Megyn Kelly is mean and bad and should be the one saying “sorry,” y’all. Let’s recap everything that’s happened between Donald Trump, blowhard verbal diarrhea presidential candidate, and Kelly, Fox News anchor who sucks a lot but actually did a decent job moderating the first Republican debate of Fuckshow 2016: Read more on Donald Trump Pretty Sure Bleeder Megyn Kelly Is The One Who Should Say Sorry…
  Republicans in so much damned disarray

Republicans Bleeding From Their Everywheres, And It Is Awesome

They sure love us
How’s the lady outreach going? The Republican Party is in the middle of a terribly bloody fight right now about which one of these assholes is the biggest asshole to women. (Hint: It’s all of them.) Thanks to the party’s current favorite presidential contender, Donald Trump, the GOP is trying, yet again, to prove it does not hate Vagina-Americans. And, like all the other failed attempts before this one, it’s going as well as you’d expect. Read more on Republicans Bleeding From Their Everywheres, And It Is Awesome…
  Menstrual Blood Libel!

Donald Trump: Why Was Megyn Kelly Moderating A Debate Instead Of In The Blood Hut?

Hey, it makes as much sense as the original
Hey, it makes as much sense as the original How’s this for a surprise? Donald Trump shot his fool mouth off again, and this time managed to say something stupid enough to get himself disinvited from Erick Erickson’s Cattle Call For Rightwing Ninnyhammers, as we all know what a stickler for politesse Erick, Son of Erick, is. In an interview with CNN Friday, Trump said that he could tell that Megyn Kelly was simply too flushed with lady hormones to be nice to him at Thursday’s Republican primary debate: Read more on Donald Trump: Why Was Megyn Kelly Moderating A Debate Instead Of In The Blood Hut?…
  The Browns Will Defeat The Rainbow!

Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull

Just lie back and think of gerrymandering
Oh, sure, you liberals may be feeling pretty chuffed with how well 2015 has been going for you, what with your Obamacare surviving and your Supreme Court Victory for Sodom, and your beloved Barry Bamz just having a fine time being a highly mobile duck who isn’t the least bit lame, but the real joke is on YOU, according to Teabagging never-nude Erick Erickson. You see, he knows that conservatives have a secret weapon in their quiver, and that is the fact that the Latins will out-breed you birth-controlling liberals and you queerfolk what can’t make babbies at all. Welcome to extinction, you with all your abortions! Read more on Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull…
  Look! Rhetoric!

Wingnuts Invent Fun New Way To Slur Each Other, Hooray!

There might be some racist implications to this term. But only pussies care about racism
Heya Wonkers! We would like to have words with you. Or rather, a word with you. And that word is “cuckservative,” which is the hot new catchphrase of Summer 2015. Expect to start seeing it everywhere soon, and also to be completely fucking sick of it by September. What exactly cuckservative means depends on who you ask, but the one thing that everyone agrees on is that it’s a portmanteau of “cuckolded” and, duh, “conservative,” and that it started being flung gleefully around the Twitter machine about a month ago, mostly but not exclusively by supporters and fans of Donald Trump. And it’s used by True Manly Conservatives to mock Republicans who have let themselves be co-opted by the Establishment, which is hopelessly tainted by feminized liberalism. Also, depending on who’s using it, it may be — probably is — proudly affiliated with racism and nativism. Or as Joan Walsh explains in Salon: Read more on Wingnuts Invent Fun New Way To Slur Each Other, Hooray!…
  New Genocide Needed So Wingnuts Can Find Fresh Metaphor

Watch Erick Erickson Shove This Coat Hanger Up GOP’s Vagina!

Little angel babies!
. Perpetual rage machine and Fox News contributor Erick Erickson is really, really mad that Planned Parenthood is getting rich off trafficking in murdered baby parts (which it isn’t, but shut up, he knows it is). Not only is he demanding a government shutdown if funding for Planned Parenthood isn’t immediately aborted, he also says that if the GOP doesn’t have the huevos to completely bring government to a halt over a bunch of misleadingly edited videos, then it’s damn well time for conservatives to destroy the Republican Party. More. Maybe they could start a whole new party just for anti-abortion absolutists, with a bloody fetus hanging on a cross for its symbol. Read more on Watch Erick Erickson Shove This Coat Hanger Up GOP’s Vagina!…
  Enraged about all of these things

Here Are 9 Wingnut Reasons For Charleston Murders That Aren’t Spelled R-A-C-I-S-M

They call themselves His People. Weird.
Dylann Storm Roof killed black people because he wanted to kill black people. Roof admitted this! But maybe it’s not about race. Let’s take another trip down Wingnut River to see why Roof’s nine victims — Rev. Clementa Pinckney, Tywanza Sanders, Susie Jackson, Cynthia Hurd, Sharonda Coleman-Singleton, DePayne Middleton-Doctor, Ethel Lee Lance, Myra Thompson, and Rev. Daniel Lee Simmons, Sr. REALLY died. Read more on Here Are 9 Wingnut Reasons For Charleston Murders That Aren’t Spelled R-A-C-I-S-M…
  low hanging fruit

Mike Huckabee: Hawking Fake Diabetes Cures Proves I’ll Be A Great President

Yours for only $19.95, bitches.
Republican presidential “candidate” Mike Huckabee is in trouble with liberals like CBS’s Bob Schieffer for, among other things, appearing in infomercials hawking “Diabetes Solution Kits” (yours for just $19.95!), which encourage healthy eating, exercise, oh and also curing diabetes with cinnamon. Because that’s totally real. Appearing on “Face the Nation,” Huckabee got ALL KINDS of defensive, because first of all, you are not his real mom and you can’t tell him what to do: Read more on Mike Huckabee: Hawking Fake Diabetes Cures Proves I’ll Be A Great President…
 

Baltimore’s All F*cked Up Because There Aren’t Enough Dads Or Jesus

Another day, another city torn apart and going up in flames because black folk get all pissy for some reason when cops kill them and then shrug when asked to explain how the hell that happened, all the time. After Freddie Gray was arrested by Baltimore police and somehow mysteriously ended up with severe spinal injuries that killed him — strange how police have no idea how that happened, it just did — Baltimore’s residents have reacted as you might expect, with protests and outrage and demands for answers. And the city and state have also reacted as you might expect, with cops in riot gear, a declaration of a state of emergency, a week-long curfew, and deployment of the National Guard. Read more on Baltimore’s All F*cked Up Because There Aren’t Enough Dads Or Jesus…
  Because The Gays are the real terrorists

Atlanta Fire Chief Simply Does Not Care For Gay People, Wingnuts Are ON IT

omg, y'all, I cannot even with this
Today in religiously freedoming The Gays, we are hearing about the martyrdom of Atlanta Ex-Fire Chief and Soldier of Our Lord Kelvin Cochran, who was fired either for being a Christian hero for perpetual non-gay straightness, or for being a problem employee with abhorrent views who didn’t follow procedure concerning Atlanta public officials who write books, you decide. Let’s freedomsplore! Last fall, Cochran wrote a book entitled Who Told You That You Were Naked. Someone at ThinkProgress seems to have taken one for the team, hooray, and read parts of it, hopefully aloud to a laughing, jeering audience. Read more on Atlanta Fire Chief Simply Does Not Care For Gay People, Wingnuts Are ON IT…
  Are You Afraid Enough? Please Be More Afraid

America Turns To Wingnuts For Comfort, Wisdom On Paris Attacks

Nous ne sommes pas étonnés
So it looks like the search for the murderers of 12 people at the Paris offices of Charlie Hebdo has come to its bloody end, with all the terrorists dead and four hostages killed in an attack on a kosher supermarket in Paris. As usual in these situations (and can we all just pause for a moment and be horrified that we know what’s “usual” in a terrorist attack?), a lot of the details are still not yet certain. But while we’re still learning the details, it’s definitely not too soon to move to the vital important next phase: explaining how the events in Paris fit into American culture-war politics, especially the all-important question of What To Do About All The Muslims. Read more on America Turns To Wingnuts For Comfort, Wisdom On Paris Attacks…