Tag: cnn

This One Idiot Pretty Sure James Comey Framed Trump For All His Russian Pee Crimes

Ladies and gentlemen, Mollie Hemingway!

Corker, Conway And Santorum: The Unholy Trinity Of CNN’s ‘State Of The Union’

What dumb shit were they saying on CNN yesterday? You'll never have to watch for yourself again.

The Two Best Times Stormy Daniels’s Lawyer Was SO FUCKIN’ HOT The Past 24 Hours, Because We Only Saw Him On TV Twice

Miiiiichael Avenattttttttttttttttti. It's pronounced like Jooooordan Catalaaaaaaaaaaano.

Rick Santorum Is Fucking Asshole

Why does this man have a job on TV anywhere?

Keep It Up, Donald Trump. You’re Just Making Robert Mueller’s Job Easier.

How many times can Trump obstruct justice on Twitter in one weekend? ALL OF THEM KATIE.

Oh Fuck Off, Axios

Things we do not need today: Journalism-splaining from Axios on how everybody SHOULD have handled Sam Nunberg.

Sam Nunberg Went To CNN And MSNBC For More Free Therapy Last Night. It Did Not Go Well.

How day-drunk was Sam Nunberg, on a scale of One to Dana Rohrabacher?

And Then Sam Nunberg Bit His Own Dick Off On Jake Tapper’s CNN Show LOLOL TOTALLY NORMAL

We are sorry for calling Carter Page the dumbest person in the Trump-Russia investigation, we will never do that again.

John Kelly Kicks Jared Kushner From Top Secret Band. Wonkagenda For Wed., Feb. 28, 2018

Jared Kushner can't play with big kids, the NSA would like to stop Russia, and Hope Hicks tells a few 'white lies.' Your morning news brief.

Trump Wants To Run FAA Like Trump Shuttle. Wonkagenda For Mon., Feb. 26, 2018

Democrats release their Trump-Russia memo, Trump wants his personal pilot to head the FAA, Olympians wonder what the hell Ivanka does anyway. Your morning news brief!

NRA Spokeswoman Dana Loesch Being A Vampire, Again

The problem, she says, is crazy people. Hmmm.

Marco Rubio YA BURNT By A Bunch Of #Teens, And We Are HERE FOR IT

Also Cameron Kasky called Dana Loesch a vampire and we are DYING.

Trump Holds After School Shooting Special. Wonkagenda For Thurs., Feb. 22, 2018

Trump becomes president (again), young people are sick of dying from pro-gun bullshit, and IL Gov. Bruce Rauner drinks diversity milk. Your morning news brief.

Trump Staffers Just Love How Mass Shootings Let Them Catch Some Well-Deserved R&R

Fuck all these disgusting people right in the ear.

President Psycho Dick Spent His Holiday Weekend Tweeting, Because Of Course He Did

Oh boy, Donald Trump was on a roll!

Mike Pence Has This Terrible Pain In All The Diodes Down His Left Side

Let's dispel with this fiction that Mike Pence doesn’t know what he’s doing. He knows exactly what he’s doing.