As Count Dracula and Oscar the Grouch wage their endless intergenerational war over who gets to be the other senator from Minnesota, current senator Amy Klobuchar has her hands full. You see, the good citizens of Minnesota have just one person to harass about their unemployment benefits or their third nipples or establishing a new holiday to celebrate cats. MORE »

* Heard on the Hill: Rep. Jesse Jackson, Jr. makes every member of his staff turn in their resignation, then wait to be rehired… Rep. Mike Pence wore a flashy new suit! He’s running for Minority Leader, so a second suit can’t hurt… Isaac Hayes was on The Hill lobbying for the recording industry. Also, he’s a Scientologist. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Redskins owner/obvious bastard Dan Snyder will be attending Tom Cruise’s cult wedding… More Shelley Sekula-Gibbs, still no details on just how “mean.” [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: As a publicist has already made sure to alert us, Eva Longoria was in town. She told a few jokes at a luncheon or something… Jim McGreevey might be on Joan Rivers’ new show, the Gay View… Freshmen Senators are stuck in the basements of Dirksen and Hart, Bob Corker and Sherrod Brown forced to share copier. [Examiner]
* Under the Dome: George Allen’s sister Jennifer wrote stories even dirtier than Jim Webb’s… Alan Keyes, Rep. Chip Pickering (R-Miss.) and former Rep. Bob Barr (R-Ga.). are all in Borat… Senators-elect Sherrod Brown and Amy Klobuchar are former students of Joe Lieberman at Yale… Rep. Allyson Schwartz (D-Pa.) reports: Congress is like High School! [The Hill]

The first in what may or may not become an occasional series.

Remember the epic tale of Joe Lieberman’s website? It’s playing out again in miniature out in the frozen wasteland of Minnesota, where Amy Klobuchar and Mark Kennedy are fighting to replace Senator Mark Dayton (we know you probably don’t recognize any of those names, but bear with us).

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