So, it happened. Betsy DeVos, the wildly unqualified jackass from Amway, was confirmed as the new Education secretary on Tuesday, after Democrats stayed up ALL NIGHT to explain, for the umpteenth time, why DeVos is a moron whose only interest in schools is Jesus-ing them up like a common theocrat. All 48 Democrats in the Senate voted against her, as did two Republicans, Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski, which means it was a 50-50 tie and Vice President Mike Pence had to creep his creepy ass over to the Capitol to cast the tie-breaking vote.
To review: 48 Democrats + 2 Republicans = 50 votes. The other 50 Republicans + Mike Pence = 51 votes. (That is a math problem that Betsy DeVos wouldn’t approve of, by the way, as it does not include even one prayer or Amway product.)
The reason we clarify that math is because Jill Stein has emerged from whatever anti-vaxxer idiot rock she lives under, for to tweet this:
Yes, Democrats caved to corporate interests by voting, en masse, not to confirm the billionaire dipshit lady who only got nominated because her family gives so much money to Republicans.
Asshole says what? Because Hillary and Trump were THE SAME? Because the Democrats and the Republicans are THE SAME? Oh wait, we think the vapid dicksnort is saying she didn’t actually read the article maybe, and is not aware that, again, EVERY DEMOCRAT VOTED AGAINST BETSY DEVOS. And also two Republicans, who dug deep and found their souls and brains this one time.
But why else might there have been a tie, hmmmmmm? Why do the Republicans control the Senate anyway? We wonder maybe, if Jill Stein hadn’t ever been born, if we might have had a slightly different election, and President Hillary Clinton might have nominated
somebody who’s JUST THE SAME AS BETSY DEVOS, you bet, Hillary Clinton’s Education nominee would have been JUST THE SAME either former Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm or former New York University president John Sexton for her Education secretary.
HMMMMMM, WE JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT TO THINK.
Just kidding, yes we do. Jill Stein was in there depressing the vote for Hillary Clinton — and possibly Senate Democrats! — in the Rust Belt and effectively provided the winning margin for Donald Fucking Trump. She might’ve even helped depress the vote for Senate Democrats all across America! And we’d call her simply a normal spoiler if it weren’t for how she pals around with the same Russian goons who helped Trump win the election by tiny margins in … THREE STATES IN THE RUST BELT!
We don’t know if Jill Stein was an active participant in any of Russia’s schemes to steal the election for Trump, or if she’s too stupid to do that sort of thing. (Too stupid.) What we DO know is that “Dr.” Stein needs to STFU and go to hell, talkin’ out her ass about, “OMG why was there a tie on the DeVos vote? I blame the Democrats because I’m too dumb to do basic counting!”
Fuck off, asshole.