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Have I got an idea for the furshlugginer national debt!

It is Wednesday, so Donald Trump is once again saddened and appalled at the way the media has totally misinterpreted and twisted the thing he said on Tuesday. This Wednesday, that thing happens to be the thing he said at a rally that sure sounded like he maybe was suggesting that “Second Amendment People” would have to assassinate Hillary Clinton to protect her from using the Supreme Court to overturn the Second Amendment. Which by the way, is not actually a thing the Supreme Court can do!

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Shall we refresh?

Hillary wants to abolish — essentially abolish — the Second Amendment. By the way, and if she gets to pick her judges — nothing you can do, folks. Although the Second Amendment people maybe there is, I dunno. But I tell you what, that will be a horrible day. If, if Hillary gets to put her judges — right now we’re tied.

Naturally, the Clinton campaign and all THE MEDIA purposely wrongly interpreted this as Trump telling his people that if Clinton is elected and gets to appoint Supreme Court nominees, that Second Amendment people will have to resort to assassinating her. You know, because that is exactly what it sounds like he is doing. Clearly, anyone could tell that he was just suggesting that they would hold peaceful protests and candlelight vigils and sing “We Shall Overcome,” and that the gun lobby would put pressure on the Supreme Court and politicians to make sure that this doesn’t happen. Clearly, the only people who would act as if they didn’t know exactly what Trump meant by that statement are liberal shills who are trying to rig the election for Hillary Clinton. Or something! It’s so obvious what he meant!

Except, apparently, to former campaign manager Corey Lewandowski, who said “I don’t know what he meant!” on CNN this morning.

Shouldn’t he, of all people, know exactly what Trump meant?

Speaker of the House Paul Ryan seemed to think he was telling some kind of joke! “It sounds like a joke gone bad,” he said. “You should never joke about that. I hope he clears it up quickly.”

On MSNBC’s Morning Joe, New York Representative Peter King, who has endorsed Trump, said that Trump should take back the statement, but also suggested that Trump probably had no idea about the words coming out of his own mouth, noting “I don’t think he even fully appreciated what he was saying.” He says he will continue to endorse Trump, and very much thinks that a person who “accidentally” calls for the assassination of their political rival has the temperament to be President of the United States.

Trump-whisperer Roger Stone seemed to be “on message,” appearing on Newsmax’s Newsmax Prime…

“They don’t want to talk about the IRS investigation into Hillary or the fact that we just learned that she armed ISIS and lied about it. Instead, we’re going to nitpick Trump and unfairly interpret his words. So the media claims that he advocated gun violence against his opponent when he said gun owners can affect the election, meaning their voting power. It’s a smear. It’s a mainstream media smear.”

Which is understandable because he, too, has suggested that if Clinton is elected (in what will obviously be a rigged election), people will need to peacefully lobby their legislators in hopes of resolving the situation.

“He needs to say for example, today would be a perfect example: ‘I am leading in Florida. The polls all show it. If I lose Florida, we will know that there’s voter fraud. If there’s voter fraud, this election will be illegitimate, the election of the winner will be illegitimate, we will have a constitutional crisis, widespread civil disobedience, and the government will no longer be the government.’”

“If you can’t have an honest election, nothing else counts,” he continued. “I think he’s gotta put them on notice that their inauguration will be a rhetorical, and when I mean civil disobedience, not violence, but it will be a bloodbath. The government will be shut down if they attempt to steal this and swear Hillary in. No, we will not stand for it. We will not stand for it.”

Rudy Giuliani, for his part, suggested that he couldn’t have possibly have meant what the LIEBERAL media said he meant, because if he had said that, the crowd would have gone wild because they all love the idea of assassinating Hillary Clinton so much.

“You know how speeches go. He was talking about how they [gun rights advocates] have the power to keep her out of office. That’s what he was talking about,” he added. “With a crowd like that, if that’s what they thought he’d meant, they’d have gone wild.”

Although the thing is… uh, some Trump supporters certainly did interpret it that way, and see nothing wrong with it because they believe in all that “the purpose of the Second Amendment is so people can defend themselves against the government” thing. Which is, of course, why assassination is legal, George Washington was totes cool with the Whiskey Rebellion, and Abraham Lincoln let the South secede that one time.

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We have been repeating this cycle for weeks now. Donald Trump, a straight shooter who tells it like it is, says a thing that sounds pretty terrible, and then THE MEDIA reports on it, and then he goes “I didn’t mean it that way! The media is out to get me!” Either he is doing this on purpose and is completely aware of how his remarks come across, or he is incredibly, incredibly stupid. Because how dense would you have to be to say something that could be “interpreted” that way in the first place? Also, maybe he should send out some kind of memo or something telling his people what the party line on the weird thing he’s gonna say is, so they can actually do a good job of pretending they all totally understand exactly what he meant and that the media is totally just misinterpreting everything? I mean, if that is the angle he’s gonna play, there are certainly better ways to play it.

[CBS | Talking Points Memo | Media Matters | Reddit | ABC]

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  • Beowoof14

    Really Donnie, this is a Sharron Angle redux, with her second amendment remedies. I thought she was dumb, but damn Donnie you have her beat by miles.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      After elected officials talking about “second amendment solutions” to problems with the government, how are we supposed to interpret second amendment people taking action to solve government problems? What other solutions would second amendment people come up with?

  • Incoming Ham

    Paul Ryan really needs to let it go. I know he is trying to be party line and all, but if this all goes pear shaped or Hillary is elected (when) he will be done.

    • I see no problem with that.

      Edit: Even if the ONLY benefit to Ryan losing his seat is the awesome Paul Krugman blog post on the subject, it’ll be worth seeing Ryan lose his seat (and there will be just… just SO many benefits to Ryan losing his seat…)

    • OneYieldRegular

      Ryan is already done. He has made his Faustian bargain, and the bill will soon be due. Does any sentient being see this Trump phenomenon ending well in any way?

      • Blank Ron

        The last couple of times it happened it ended on a lamp post and in a bunker. No, I don’t either.

    • Daisy

      How’s that a bad thing? Paul Ryan can go fuck himself, cause I’m not doing it, not even with Trump’s microscopic dick.

      • Incoming Ham

        I don’t think it’s a bad thing at all. He lacks self awareness to know that is what is happening or is in decision paralysis. It’s sad but satisfying to watch.

    • Oblios_Cap

      The GOP has always put party above country. That’s how they roll, baby.

  • RobKanC

    At this point, does Donald Trump even know what he means. I think his brain has lost control of the ass which just spews random verbal diarrhea like a orange racoon.

  • Oblios_Cap

    “With a crowd like that, if that’s what they thought he’d meant, they’d have gone wild.”
    So… Ghouliani is saying Trump supporters are a bunch of murderous yahoos? Huh.

    • OneYieldRegular

      That is a truly astounding statement, and is going directly into my Big Book of Truly Astounding Statements.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        You’re gonna need a bigger book. Three more months to go :(

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Pace yourself. By November you’ll probably get a hernia lifting the damn thing.

    • OddMan

      Mr. Ghouliani says Mr. Trump has the power to whip his followers into a frenzy and they will go out and get their guns and start hunting Ms Clinton.

      That does seem juuust a bit over the top.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Hmmmm… Funny that Rudy likes this charitable interpretation, especially when he interprets “Black Lives Matter” to mean “KILL WHITEY!!11!!!” Odd, it’n it?

  • Gayer Than Thou

    If you’ve ever had a relative who had mental health issues, you know that you’re gonna hear so much borderline nonsense – some of it just plain offensive and shocking – that you eventually don’t hear it or react to it. It’s self-defense, in a way. I sense the media having that reaction to Trump. The difference, of course, is that this isn’t my grandmother defending her hoarding. This is a guy running for leader of the free world.

    • cat cafe

      and inciting low-information, poor-impulse-control idiots to violence and murder.

      • Gayer Than Thou

        Well, I did try to control her in that regard, but she insisted on forwarding all those emails to my cousins.

        Oh… you mean Trump.

    • chimichanga

      …….

  • TeeRaak

    Second Amendment people are those people in a “well-regulated” militia…
    https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/95/National_Guard_emblem.gif/600px-National_Guard_emblem.gif
    In other words, The National Guard

    • Sardonicuss

      Not These people?

      • Logic of Color

        I’d prefer the butt

      • wurman

        The worst part is having a penis small enough to fit inside that .223 caliber (5.56 mm) bore. However, the cartoonish images should have also shown an ammosexual mouthing the muzzle.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          I like to think there’s still a round in the chamber.

          • wurman

            Gives all new meaning to the term “getting off(ed)”

    • Ed Itable

      And carrying single-shot weaponry.

  • Blank Ron

    This is terrorism, pure and simple. Why the fuck is nobody admitting it?

    • Spotts1701

      Former CIA chief Michael Hayden was on yesterday saying if it were anyone other than Trump, the rest of the conversation would happen in the back of a police car following “You have the right to remain silent…”

      • Sardonicuss

        If the Secret Service doesn’t publicly announce an incident investigation – then there should be a media outcry.

        • Daisy

          hahahaha. Media outcry? Fucking CNN can’t do their goddamned job on a good day as it is!

          • Blank Ron

            They’re pushing the ‘oh, that’s not what he said’ nonsense harder than anyone.

          • Sardonicuss

            I said media…not CNN.

          • Daisy

            Ooops, good point. Sorry!

        • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

          In the interests of efficiency, and as a cost saving measure, they could have Trump’s detail conduct the investigation.
          I have to feel sorry for those poor bastards btw. How would you like that assignment?

          • Sardonicuss

            Hard to imagine anyone saying: “Yeah..I’ll take a bullet for that guy..it’s my job”.

          • Blank Ron

            I can see them going all cold the moment a gun appears, then using Trump to shield themselves.

          • Sardonicuss

            He supposedly wears a vest. So…perfect human shield!

          • Daisy

            I’m guessing it’s the, “You fucked up, so here’s your new job” assignment

    • OneYieldRegular

      It is literally worse than yelling “FIRE!” in a crowded theater (and yes, I’m aware of the use/misuse of the word “literally”).

  • Spotts1701

    And then there’s Katrina Pierson, who decided “Trump meant that it could happen, not that it should happen” was the appropriate response.

  • limberrat

    Wait Roger Stone, what IRS investigation are you talking about? Last I checked your candidate is being fucking audited!

    • Blank Ron

      He’s desperately hoping we forget that.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        While reminding us that’s the reason why he won’t release his tax returns.

  • Oblios_Cap

    I can’t decide until I hear Michele Fiore’s take on Trump’s comment.

    • limberrat

      **BAM BAM BAM**

    • dslindc

      Something about tits and guns and tyranny, probably.

      • calliecallie

        Which is really quite different than when you’re talking about tits and guns and tranny.

    • Beowoof14

      Need to hear from the Nevada nuts?

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      I am pretty sure them Bundy fellas would say whatever he asked in return for a conjugal visit from the Donald.

    • Rufus T. Firefly

      His comment about “titties just like Detroit?”

      • Duke

        Oh, yea…

  • Joshua Norton

    He was talking about how they [gun rights advocates] have the power to keep her out of office. That’s what he was talking about

    Trump claims this is what he said earlier yesterday. A claim disputed by what he said earlier yesterday.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      If she’s picking judges, the only thing you can do is keep her out of office? Right.
      When do we get new poll results? I have popcorn.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Yeah. The picking judges part sounds like this is an action that will take place after she’s already won the election, so the unified voices of ammosexuals won’ be worth too much.

  • Vegan and Tiara

    “If, if Hillary gets to put her judges — right now we’re tied.”

    Hillary and Trump are tied? With what?

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Dick size.

      • Blank Ron

        Nah, Hillz is WAY ahead of him there, too.

        • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

          I’ll take your word for it. I’m not about to do the measuring.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Brass balls vs. gold-plated tin.

    • Aileen

      I think he means there are 4 liberals and 4 conservatives on the Supreme Court right now.

      • Vegan and Tiara

        He might be smarter than I think he is.

    • Lefty Frizzell

      I thought he was talking about the SC being tied 4 4.

      • Berkeleybear94

        Yep. Which says a ton about how he sees the court and the value he places on concepts like the rule of law and legal reasoning. It’s all just sport – which also explains his run on “rigged” elections (working the refs ahead of time and priming his “fans” – which is what he calls supporters – to blame anyone but him for losing). This is how you destroy legitimate governance by reducing it all down to a game. Of course if people had respect for playing games with good sportsmanship that might be different – but as any sports radio host will tell you, the people supporting Trump only think its cheating when the other guy does it. If your guy does it it’s being a smart competitor.

      • Vegan and Tiara

        Oh, you’re right, I didn’t think to give him that much credit! I assumed he meant they were tied in the polls, but I was pretending I thought the two of them were tied together.

    • BadKitty904

      It seems to me that reminding Americans that HE might be selecting SCOTUS Justices should paint a *much* bigger target on Trump’s behind…

  • Daisy

    Oh my fucking god that idiot Trump supporter on social media fucking terrifies me.

    • Blank Ron

      It’s as if they enjoy spreading terror. There’s a name for that. It’s right on the tip of my tongue.

      • Ed Itable

        Benghazi!

  • BearGHAZI

    If he dropped trow and sprayed shit all over the rubes, Paul Manafort would accuse us all of misinterpreting ‘the joke’

    • limberrat

      The Aristocrats!

  • Lefty Frizzell

    I don’t get the “mainstream”/”establishment” republicans.

    Their defense is that he’s a complete idiot who has no idea what he’s saying most of the time, and yet they’re still endorsing him to take over the most important job in the world in less than three months. Where a word in the wrong place can tank the stock market at home or start an invasion half way round the world.

    Can they not see a small problem anywhere in their future?

    • Blank Ron

      No. They are not that bright.

    • ManchuCandidate

      If they did then maybe they would have realized that Iraqinam would have been a huge mistake, deregulation of the financial industry was a horrible idea and that voting for Trump in the primaries would lead to this tragicomedy farce.

    • AngryKatie

      They’re in melt down mode. It never occurred to them that when they got the rubes all riled up and primed to vote for whoever they packaged to appeal to them, someone else could swoop in and steal them.

      Trump is, literally, a cuckoo bird in this scenario.

    • fka_donnie_d

      Bingo. Perhaps there is something else going on. Perhaps they are hoping that anyone else will seem “moderare”, “reasonable”, and “centrist” in comparison, no matter what vile batshittery ze spews forth.

  • cousin itt

    Meanwhile, on the alt-universe timeline: ‘My fellow Americans, I’m pleased to tell you today that I’ve signed legislation that will outlaw Hillary forever. We begin Second-Amendmating in five minutes’

    • Sardonicuss

      Pierce does some pretty good Reaganees – Trumpism head to head.
      http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/politics/news/a47511/trump-2nd-amendment-reaction/

    • ManchuCandidate

      That’s the Britta of timelines. The same timeline where Khan is a white englishman, the Nazis won WW2 and the Southrons won the Civil War, I mean, the Wah of Nawthrun Aggreshun.

      • wurman

        Ahhhhh yes, the epical beatdown of States’ Rights, the Xth Amendment, and freedom from either congressional regulation or executive orders. Or as they say nowadays “If at first you don’t succeed, secede again.”

  • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

    So Mayor 9/11 sez: “With a crowd like that, if that’s what they thought he’d meant, they’d have gone wild.”

    I dunno, Rudy…I don’t see how saying his supporters would have been baying for blood had he actually called for them to assassinate Hillary Clinton really helps…

  • So, two things… “Right now, we’re tied” is possibly the biggest lie of the election campaign so far, but everything outta his mouth is pretty much tied for that…

    Thing the two: The 2nd amendment is not about “shoot people who try to take your guns” in any but the most simpleminded interpretation. I mean, I know, Trump supporter and all, but just wow…

    • Arolpin

      I actually think he we referring to the 4 liberal justices, the 4 conservative justices, and the empty seat because the constitutional right to appoint federal justices doesn’t apply to a Democratic President if there will be another election.

      • So, what you’re saying is that the only way Obama can obey the constitution and have a judge appointed to the vacancy is to make sure that there are no more elections by appointing himself dictator for life?

        • Arolpin

          It would be irresponsible not to speculate!

  • Vecchiojohn

    I don’t think Trump really meant to lob that nuke at the Washington Post.

    • Spotts1701

      Saw a great tweet last night – When Trump fires off the nukes, the last living Trump spokesperson will release a statement stating he really didn’t mean to do it to the last living journalist.

      • Skadi

        Aren’t you being a bit of an optimist?

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          About Trump spokespersons being left alive?

          • Skadi

            Or journalists either.

          • CPav

            Cockroaches will survive.

          • CPav

            Of course, I’m just making a scientific observation. Anyone that thinks I’m calling anyone else (or anyone else’s spokespersons) cockroaches, is clearly reading what I just said in terms of what I just said, not in terms of what I intended you to read what I just said once you took offense at what I just said.

  • schmannity

    It’s not a rifle scope, it’s surveyor’s marks.

  • OneYieldRegular

    My favorite was California Congressional Idiot Duncan Hunter, who tried to pass Trump’s comment off by saying that Trump was sometimes “inarticulate” and “says things that the way they come out are not the way he means.”

    Does he actually think such a quality is reassuring for someone who aims to become President and have to deal with delicate diplomacy over international crises?

    • Spotts1701
    • Daisy

      I’m sure I should look up what my local idiot said, particularly since he’s House leadership, but fuck, I don’t wanna know.

      • Spotts1701

        Sen. Dean Heller basically gave the same mealy-mouthed “Well, I don’t support what he says” answer that seems to be the boilerplate response the GOP has settled on.

        • Daisy

          Charming, the lot of them.

          • Spotts1701

            Yup, I’m at the point where if someone asks me about the Repubs running I’m going to load this BASIC response:
            10 ASK “Has the candidate denounced Donald Trump’s statements?”
            20 IF “NO” respond – “Then they are a feckless coward and I will not vote for them”
            30 IF “YES”, respond “Do they still support Donald Trump?”
            40 IF “YES” GOTO 20

          • CPav

            Ooo! An infinite loop!

  • nightmoth

    I’m glad the media is staying on this, but I really don’t think Trump’s voters will be swayed away from him over it. We were at the Clifftop music festival last week in the west of West Virginia. Driving back through the poorest of former coal mining communities was where we finally saw lots of Trump yard signs. I think this election is about class war and for a variety of bad reasons poor whites are voting for Trump.

    • Duke

      Bad reasons? Like wedge issues, emotional appeals and blatant lies?

      • Spotts1701

        Do the Republicans have anything else to use?

      • nightmoth

        Those would be the ones.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Haven’t you heard? The Drumpfenführer is going to bring back the coal industry. Problem is that the utility companies prefer gas, which is cheaper. Maybe he can get the railroads on board. (And – bonus! – manufacturing jobs in the locomotive factories.)

  • Toadette

    Are these the same supporters who call him Daddy?

  • BadKitty904

  • Señor Skwerl

    If Killary is elected I am grabbing my gun and heading on down to the wildlife refuge and liberating it for the people.

    • Sardonicuss

      Me too. There is a fine bison coat I have had my eye on.

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Don’t forget to bring plenty of snacks. We’ll ship dildos in for you.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        So thoughtful.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Will you be wanting French Vanilla creamer, or regular?

  • schmannity

    He wasn’t calling for gun violence, he meant high velocity projectiles out of Second Amendment people’s wherevers.

  • mancityfooty .

    Because no one has ever mentioned a “2nd amendment solution” before, huh?

  • Indiepalin

    There are a lot of Third Amendment people out my way and there’s no way Hillary is forcing us to quarter them Redcoats.

    • schmannity

      A gassy lot with their bangers and mash. Intolerable and they pee on the lid, the limey bastards.

  • Cindyinencinitas

    Presidential Donnie unnerstands a lot of stuff and you should elect him. Candidate Donnie not so much but it’s okay. He opens his pie hole and oops! There it goes! He didn’t mean it you guys. It’s okay.

    • Duke

      It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye or you elect a raving moran to be president.

  • Brian

    Trump didn’t say what you heard him say because Hillary, IRS, ISIS, Rigged, Revolution, Straight Shooter; so, Kill Her!!!!

  • Señor Skwerl

    It all sounds great to them until this happens. (Actually this is probably their wet dream.)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGBw8jS3sMw

  • tihond

    I say we Article Two, Section 1 Hillary Clinton in response.

  • wide_stance_hubby

    Why is Stupid Spice staying out of this? It is of a unique stupid she is uniquely qualified to slobber over.

    • Cindyinencinitas

      And where is Todd? Haven’t seen him since he crashed that snowmobile. Is he bedridden or something? Can you imagine being helpless and at her mercy? Maybe they should be watching that house for distress signals?

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Russia said they are quiet neighbors who mostly keep to themselves.

      • Blank Ron

        Sarah was seen at the local Office Depot buying a ream of Eaton’s Corrasable Bond.

  • lucidamente

    You can reject my tortured, contradictory excuses when you pry them out of my cold, dead hand.

    • Señor Skwerl

      Better get the magnifying lens and jeweler’s tools out for those tiny hands.

    • Vecchiojohn

      Cold, dead, tiny orange hands.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        My dentist could perform that service for a nominal charge.

  • Arse Grammatica

    Hey Donnie, why can’t you say this:
    “I do not advocate armed overthrow of the US government.”
    ?

  • beavertank

    That reddit comment is exactly the kind of idiot bullshit I’ve seen flying around now, even from people who say they “don’t like Trump…”

    “…but” they go on, “it’s not such a bad thing to say anyway. It’s the fourth box of liberty. You try to protect it at the soap box, then at the ballot box, then in the jurors box, and if all else fails you turn to the ammo box.”

    Because apparently shooting someone for disagreeing with you is now “patriotic”.

    And we’re going to be stuck with these idiots even after Trump goes down in flames.

    • lucidamente

      For Trump, the fourth box is Ivanka’s vagina.

    • Blank Ron

      Democracy grows out of the barrel of a gun.
      – Mao J. Trump

      • lucidamente

        Didn’t he write The Little Orange Book?

        • PubOption

          The thoughts of Chairman (and CEO) Donnie? ‘Finnegans Wake’ would be more coherent

  • DodgeDixie&Descartes

    Der Donald is pretty busy this morning what with working on the combover and taking shots at Morning Joe and Don Lemon and refusing to concede that might maybe have said stupid words again. I’m thinking in November he will establish a Government in Exile in his Post Office project in DC where he can house the official President Donald J. Trump (Almost) gift shop n lie-berry.

    • DainBramage

      I’m sure Putin would love to host a US GoverTrump in Exile.

  • BadKitty904

    You KNOW you’ve got issues when Rudy Gooey thinks your base is nuts.

  • Callyson

    He needs to say for example, today would be a perfect example: ‘I am leading in Florida. The polls all show it. If I lose Florida, we will know that there’s voter fraud.

    Yes, because it is completely impossible that voters will take a second look at their choices and decide to vote for the not-batshit crazy candidate. It must be voter fraud!!!

    • greyXstar

      “I CAN’T HEAR YOU LALALA” got old after like the second grade.

    • chortlingdingo

      I seriously don’t understand the obsession with voter fraud that righties have. Whenever it’s investigated, they find something like 0.002% of voters have committed fraud.

      I, for one, would like a refund of every tax dollar that was wasted on multiple investigations of fraud. Even better, I’d like my attorney general, who has been indicted on multiple counts of fraud, to finally lose his job.

      In other fun Texas news, the lovely Paxton has declared that if university professors try to ban guns from their classrooms, they could be subject to discipline: http://www.dallasnews.com/news/politics/headlines/20160809-professors-who-ban-guns-in-their-classrooms-will-be-punished-ut-lawyer-says.ece

      • sw19womble

        And they’re usually Republicans with properties in two or more states.

      • Blank Ron

        As with so much else, it’s projection, since ‘voter fraud’ is their only tactic for winning elections.

  • 14th Amendment people might get the paper ballot, but 2nd Amendment people get the lead veto. I am without evidence to the contrary, therefore it is so.

    • Vecchiojohn

      So you’re unanimous?

      • It’s hard to say. A idiot usually disagrees with their own statements, coherently rephrased. But they always stand by their original statement.

  • Ms.MLG1979

    Donald Trump stars in the new film, “What Hillary Wants”, directed by Dinesh D’Souza.

    Donald Trump wakes up in his Manhattan penthouse just like any other day, but he has no idea his life’s about to change forever. Melania’s passed out in the bathroom floor again, a frequent occurrence when you take rhinoceros tranquilizers to endure your nightly wifely duties. As he enters their opulent, gilded washroom, he trips over her legs, grabs her hairdryer in a desperate attempt to stop his fall, and plunges into the half-full bathtub, hair dryer clutched in his tiny hands. A shock like that might kill a lesser man, but when Donnie wakes up in a pool of his own urine, he’s a changed man, although he doesn’t know it yet! He’s been endowed with the power to read Hillary Clinton’s mind! Fasten your seatbelts for the thrill ride of a lifetime, as Trump uses his gift to tell America the truth about what Hillary wants, how and who she’s murdered, what she really thinks about Bill and the dark, apocalyptic vision she has for our country! Watch out, Hillary. He’s in your head. The fate of the nation is in Donald Trump’s delicate hands, and he’s the only man who can save us from Hillary and ourselves!

    • limberrat

      Mel Gibson is playing Donald, right?

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Not crazy enough. Maybe Gary Busey. Besides, Gary really needs the work.

        • OddMan

          Yeah, Gary has the better hair. And that wild as shit look in his eyes.

        • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

          Gary isn’t enough of an actor to play Deadbeat Donald. Only one man could fill those tiny gloves on screen, Scott Baio.

    • Cindyinencinitas

      *shudder*

    • greyXstar

      *cue shenanigans music*

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Will Dinesh be making an M. Night Shamalanesque cameo appearance? Is there a “tweest?” Will Trump’s hair stylist win an Oscar™? Will Sarah Palin be cast as the crazy bag lady who gets murdered by Killary after witnessing her accessing her secret email server? So many questions…

      • Ms.MLG1979

        Yes, and how did you know all that? Did you electrocute yourself while looking at my eye? Get out of my head! It’s fucking weird in there!

        • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

          I did not electrocute myself. All my appliances meet applicable CSA standards. I’m just psychic.

          • Ms.MLG1979

            What finger am I holding up?

          • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

            ..I..
            Just a guess…

          • Ms.MLG1979

            I would never.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      I smell a franchise!

  • Callyson

    Although the thing is… uh, some Trump supporters certainly did interpret it that way, and see nothing wrong with it because they believe in all that “the purpose of the Second Amendment is so people can defend themselves against the government” thing.

    Jesus, I hope Secret Service agents get paid overtime…

  • greyXstar

    It’s amazing how every jackass in the country loves Trump because “he says what he means”, but somehow the horrendous things he says are never what he actually meant. And constantly saying things you don’t really mean is somehow something we need in a leader…?

  • chimichanga

    Having grown up with this (I tweeted this last night) : A man who continually says he is joking, kidding after he insults, belittles or threatens someone is exhibiting classic abuser behavior. If you don’t think he did this with his family…

    • julienne58

      “Haw, you know wimmen, they can’t take a joke!”

  • calliecallie

    Trump is setting a tone for the next 8 years of Hillary’s presidency, and it ain’t pretty. Once she is elected, what could she possibly do to settle down this unruly mob that Trump has assembled and empowered?

    • Cindyinencinitas

      The mom stare.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        She will stop this car.

        • Cindyinencinitas

          And we will not be going to Dairy Queen if you keep this up.

      • calliecallie

        Known in my home as “The Irish Mother Look.” I totally get that.

    • Sardonicuss

      Confiscate the chargers for their “Hoveround” batteries?

      • I Only Like Cats

        confiscate their phone chargers.

        • Sardonicuss

          That takes care of rallys and FB. Walmarts will overflow with rage…or more rage.

    • Mr Fuflans and I were just talking about this last night. This genie has been slowly emerging from the bottle and trump pulled the cork out. There’s no way it’s going back in – even if Dems win a landslide (and perhaps especially if the Dems win a landslide).

      I need some anwisok animals now.

      • anwisok

        I can provide that.

    • Alan

      They’ll go back to their bunkers and comment on the internet. Same as the last 8 years.

  • I Only Like Cats

    I think the stupid has irreparably harmed my brain. If I try to vote Republican in November stop me.

    • Blank Ron

      Should we apply second amendment solutions, or would it be enough to take you to a bar and keep plying you with drinks?

      • I Only Like Cats

        A Xanax would be quicker. Or some shrooms I guess. Edibles?

        • Cindyinencinitas

          Is there any situation where edibles are not called for?

  • Oneofthebobs

    “It sounds like a joke gone bad.” Yeah, that’s what DT sounds like.

    • I prefer to think of the Trump candidacy as a joke that’s gone too far, but “bad” works also, too.

  • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

    Fox News’ Dana Perino: If Hillary Made Same Trump Remarks: ‘We Would All Be Going Crazy’

    Even this nitwit half gets it.

    • cmd

      I read some column she wrote (appeared in my FB feed) about accompanying W on visits to Walter Reed and how this one mom of a soldier/patient got upset and yelled at him and he just let her yell, and later told Perino that that mama had been upset with him but she was right. Guess the column was to contrast with how Trump attacked the Khans. But it made W look noble by comparison.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    “Newsmax Prime”
    That sounds like the name of a planet occupied by slobbering, paranoid racist idiots…

    • Toadette

      So, Cardassia?

      • I Only Like Cats

        In Voyager, Seska has plastic surgery to alter her skin markings. Maybe someone should run some DNA tests on Donald?

      • Cindyinencinitas

        I think some Cardassians are sexy. Not even kidding. My life… so sad.

    • Lizzietish81

      Oh this morning someone reposted something from them and guess who was on it? Our favorite Busty Second Amendment One L former congresscritter!

    • baconzgood

      Definitely sounds like a planet where a Superman vilian would originate.

  • baconzgood

    Yes…the tea party supports a president that doesn’t fully appreciate the poopy coming out of his face talking place.

    This is their vision of america. This is the guy that should have the power to send people to war. Why? Because he’s not a conservative democrat.

  • anwisok

    Home for lunch and saw that a Facebook friend had shared a pro Trump meme, about how if everybody dislikes him, he must be doing something right. *eyeroll* I responded with:

    Yesterday, your candidate either issued a thinly veiled invitation for someone to assassinate Hillary, or he proved that he is utterly incapable ofocommunicating in the English language, as even his supporters don’t agree on what his intended meaning was. Either one means he is unfit for the office.

    I’m going to start posting that kind of thing everytime I see a pro trump message on my facebook. How long do y’all think it’ll take before he unfriends me?

    • Blank Ron

      He hasn’t yet?

    • sw19womble

      Three retorts, max.

      • anwisok

        Well, this is the second time I’ve called him out on something he posted, so . . .one more, I guess!

    • timpundit

      I remember the days when I had trump voters on my facebook page. Glad, I used my Facebook Friends First Amendment Rights to eliminate that problem.

    • “if everybody dislikes him, he must be doing something right.” is the sort of thing assholes say to justify being assholes.

    • Spotts1701

      I have one like that – former co-worker, retired, went way off into the wilderness. Claims Hillary had Sanders beat up to get him to quit the race, threatened or bribed James Comey to clear her in the FBI investigation, that 13 Hours is the gospel truth, and Republicans who don’t back “the people’s choice” should be thrown out of the party.
      I haven’t responded, because I’m stuck in the position of having to stay as politically neutral as possible on FB.

      • anwisok

        I’ve been staying neutral, but have decided, “screw that!” The crazies can express their opinions, I can express a sane one.

      • cmd

        But I thought Harry Reid was the one who got beat up?

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    “If she gets to pick her judges — nothing you can do, folks. Although the Second Amendment people maybe there is…”

    That’s pretty clearly post-election, if she’s picking judges. And there’s nothing mere voters can do, unless they’re “Second Amendment people.” For some reason, I’m not having any difficulty figuring this out.
    So you know Lewandowski is [even more] full of shit [than usual] when he spins it:

    “So the media claims that he advocated gun
    violence against his opponent when he said gun owners can affect the
    election, meaning their voting power.”

  • harryeagar

    The Trump reboot — he meant they should kill her with votes, to mimic a website I saw somewhere — does not stand the scrutiny of an editor, because he has Clinton elected and nominating judges, which makes it too late to be voting against her.

    Well, no one has yet accused trump of careful speech.

    Was he suggesting that gun nuts would have the option of trying to kill the president? Yes. But we already knew they knew this.

  • Rick Hill

    So, has anyone taken the time to actually clarify Hillary’s position on guns?

    • AntiDerpomeme

      Without even asking, I’m pretty sure she’d answer that she would prefer not to be assassinated.

      • Rick Hill

        I just haven’t heard anyone come forward and say “Her actual position is…” Just everyone screeching “She’s coming for our guns!!!1!”

        • AntiDerpomeme

          Unlike the orange asshole, she does have an articulated position and plan. She has said that she believes we need to strengthen background checks and not let abusers/violent criminals have access to guns. Nothing too extreme, but you know, in the eyes of the fucking NRA, asking that gun owners be responsible is just a goldang bridge too far.

          https://www.hillaryclinton.com/issues/gun-violence-prevention/

    • Logic of Color

      Her position is she prefers being behind them

      • Rick Hill

        As if. She has people for that. Everyone knows that when she takes a personal hand in it, it’s with a garrote.

        • Poe’s Law

          A stiletto would be more ladylike

          • Rick Hill

            That’s no ladle…that’s my knife

      • Bill Slider

        Well said.

  • limberrat

    That was a great Presidetial Pivot there guys. Didn’t even make it 24 hours this time!

    • Toadette

      Oh, he pivots, but always to the right.

  • TheGrandWaz00

    Trump surrogates kind of remind me of the last GOP candidate.
    http://d35brb9zkkbdsd.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/mittromneycartoon-300×232.gif

    • natoslug

      That is the most frightening tampon I’ve ever seen.

  • BadKitty904

  • baconzgood

    I have the answer for why he said this. The woman’s gymnastics team was taking the lime light off him. So he felt compelled to be in today’s news cycle.

  • Sardonicuss

    Because threatening political opponents, as well as lacking clarity of speech are in no way disqualifying for the White House.
    Yelling…”Eyahhhhh” at a campaign rally: Definite no no..

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …funny how the Trump campaign released that doctored video where Hillz supposedly says she will raise taxes on the middle class and that is a flat out, cold blooded indictment of her policy. However Trumpenstein calls for the assassination of his political rival and talks about “titties” in a 48 hours period and we should essentially ignore it

  • limberrat

    Remember when Republican Presidential candidates were at least coherent in their speeches and didn’t call on the death of their opponents? Good times, good times.

    • Well, they had Dubya there for a while, so lacking coherence is a Republican tradition going back a while now.

  • DainBramage

    It’s all CBS’s fault. They invented alien bugs that invade the brain through your ear and turn you crazy.

  • Royal Ugly Dude, Esq.

    I’ve seen a lot of headlines to the effect of “Did Trump Cross the Line?”
    For fuck’s sake, there IS no line with these people.

    • DainBramage

      Maybe, just maybe, if he carried out his threat to kill someone on 5th Avenue. That might be the line for 5% of them.

    • sw19womble

      That it’s still only a question instead of a statement of fact is the most alarming thing of all.

      Any other country – fuck, every previous US election – this festering rectal prolapse would have been booted so far from office, he’d have to organise his next six bankruptcies via satellite from his new orbit around Uranus.

    • Sardonicuss

      Buzzfeed’s brave lede was: “Was it a joke?”
      Now: “Deadly Serious”
      Cracker jack journo work there.

      • Shoto

        Pulitzer! Um…I meant to say “Birdcage liner!”

  • Hillary armed ISIS?

    • Yeah, that was a new fever dream to me as well…

    • Logic of Color

      That is one busy lady

    • PubOption

      She must have had the Mexican cartels ship the guns they got from ‘Fast and Furious’ off to ISIS, and paid them with foreign contributions to the Clinton foundation.

  • AngryKatie

    Trump’s spokeshorror Katrina Pierson was on MSNBC this morning. She went with the argument that he shouldn’t be held accountable for things that he says off the cuff at public events, and that we shouldn’t worry about that, because he wouldn’t say those kinds of things when presidenting.

    Here’s the interview, it’s worth a watch for the ending when the anchor admits she’s been derp coma’d:
    http://www.mediaite.com/online/msnbcs-kate-snow-rips-katrina-pierson-im-speechless-because-im-trying-to-follow-your-logic/

    • wide_stance_hubby

      What special place in hell awaits this twat we should not know from.

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        I’m surprised that fucking dimwit was smart enough to appear without her bullet necklace. Actually, who am I kidding? Someone had to tell her not to wear it…

        • Shan the Libtart

          Wait, those aren’t trophy peens?

          • pstockholm

            Judging by the size and number, I think she gets one molded from the boss every time she …
            jesus, I just totally ewwed myself out.

          • Shan the Libtart

            Yeah, sorry I accidentally pushed you down THOSE stairs…

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            I refused to go there, to even consider Donny’s lil’ Trumple red rocket even for a moment….see? My brain just rejected THAT image and it was pretty overt!

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            All of them are Ted Cruz sized maybe?

          • Shan the Libtart

            Or maybe she’s 20 feet tall.

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            Don’t try to make her seem desirable to me….

          • Shan the Libtart

            You would just get scuba gear and crawl right in, wouldn’t you?

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            I’d wear my Indiana Jones fedora and bring a whip with me…

      • AngryKatie

        I’ve started referring to her as Old Yeller. Both because she appears to be rabid, and because she’s always fucking yelling at me.

    • Spotts1701

      “Don’t listen to what he says, except when we tell you to listen to what he says”? That’s their new positioning?

  • Scooby

    If Trump meant it then why is Hillary still alive?

    • sw19womble

      She’s a survivor!

  • Jeff in the desert

    Look. The fuckface meant what the fuckface said. I bet Trump doesn’t even know what end the projectile comes out of a gun. He is too stupid to handle a gun, and as most cowards send others to do his dirty work. That fuck will say anything to rile the low life racists to grab their dicks, uh I mean, guns and shoot off a few.

    Fuck you Trump and all the weak ass shitferbrains that support you and are too stupid to see the scam is on them…..total lowlife asshole. Ah….I feel better.

    • SeekingBarbie

      fuck ’em all!

  • Shoto

    “It sounds like a joke gone bad,” said ZEGS Ryan.

    There are no words that can adequately convey the magnitude of my contempt and loathing for Paul Ryan. He’s the worst kind of lightweight, opportunistic, demagogue sleazebag poseur; a truly execrable life-form.

    OK, so I sugar-coated my sentiments just a bit…

    • Jeff in the desert

      COWARD. He is a coward.

      • Shoto

        Yup.

        • Jeff in the desert

          And his fucking buddies in Republican establishment.

          • Villago Delenda Est

            The party of racists, greedheads, and cowards.

    • Akat

      He’s a lightweight Chris Cristie (pun intended?)

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    “They don’t want to talk about the IRS investigation into Hillary …”

    The only candidate being investigated by the IRS is Trump.

    • Blank Ron

      That’s why they don’t want to talk about it – it doesn’t exist.

    • Jeff in the desert

      The IRS determined that the Clintons paid too much income tax and wanted to let them know they are getting a refund……

  • DainBramage

    I just can’t even imagine how terrible, mortifying and destructive it would be for this clown to be the voice of the US. I mean, George W was an almost daily embarrassment, but Trump makes him look sane and reasonable.

    • sw19womble

      Bush was just doing what Cheney and the Special Interests told him to do, and say.
      Trump is a whole different kettle of rancid skunkmeat

      • Jeff in the desert

        SKUNKZ LIBELZZZZZ…they come by it naturally and Peppy was kinda cute, no?

        • sw19womble

          I was thinking more roadkill than disney, but of course I would not wish to tarnish the character of any living woodland creature by comparing them with either Trump, or that weird unnatural thing on his head.

          • Jeff in the desert

            Not Disney…Warner Bros….Along with the others in the gang, bugs, road runner!!!!, yosemite sam, foghorn leghorn, wile e coyote, all voiced by Mel Blanc…

          • sw19womble

            “small d” non-proprietal, genericized, fair use, umm… that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

          • Jeff in the desert

            k, I understand… like Kleenex, Aspirin, Band-Aid, etc…

          • SeekingBarbie

            I love roadrunners! NM state bird!

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            I call roadkill libelz.

    • Hardly Ideal

      Goddamn, Bush Jr. deserves a spot on Mount Rushmore compared to Trump. If memory serves, he at least said we shouldn’t paint Muslims with a broad brush while we get Bin Laden.

  • Alan

    “By the way, and if she gets to pick her judges — nothing you can do, folks. Although the Second Amendment people maybe there is….” Every third grader knows how to sequence. The doing something clearly follows the getting to pick judges.

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    It takes a village to figure out what the fuck Little Donnie says.

    • Ed Itable

      It takes a village idiot to figure out what the fuck Little Donnie says. –fixed

      • Jeff in the desert

        Village idiot LIBELZ!!!!!!!! Poor thing…..

      • natoslug

        Speaking of Tundra Grifters, I am amazed at how quiet she’s been since Donut stole her schtick.

        • Jeff in the desert

          She is just blue…hahaha…..’cause she aint the VP pick…again

        • AnOuthouse

          She is going to nurse the ‘not invited to the convention’ grudge for a long time. Plus coming up with bail monies for the kids is probably a full time job.

        • Thaumaturgist

          1. If you had to choose between Tundra Grfter and. . . . ?

          2. She went to ground to keep him from stepping on her brand.

          • natoslug

            He’s doing quite well at #2, although his version is a bit more violent, and may actually be a cheap N. Korean knockoff.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        It takes a village idiot to deny what the little fuck Donnie says.

  • fawkedifiknow

    He was just talking about survey markers, not gun sights, for chrissakes!!

  • Akat

    I love that Wonkette is always saying exactly what I’m thinking.

    • Blank Ron

      One of us… one of us…

    • natoslug

      BOOBS!!!!!

    • sw19womble

      Antidisestablishmentarianism!

      • Blank Ron

        Narf!

    • Shan the Libtart

      PEEN!

    • natoslug

      I’m glad I am not the only one who was thinking about the Patron Saint of Handjobs . . . https://twitter.com/fakedansavage/status/763421949162815488

    • Cindyinencinitas

      Poop.

      • Akat

        Ahaha I have a 3 month I’m with all day long so yeah…

  • natoslug

    On the plus side, this will look mild in comparison with at least one of the lies he comes up with in the next three days. By Friday, this will be just one more random dead dude on Fifth Avenue.

  • Nockular cavity

    “we’re going to nitpick Trump”

    Let’s not bicker and argue about who threatened to shoot who…

    • Sardonicuss

      …….why just look at my wife’s huge….tracts of land!

  • VforV, I’m with Her!

    I love the Tweet that says “I said pro 2A citizens must organize …” He didn’t say that. He could have — you’d think a tells-it-like-it-is guy with all the best words should be able to express that thought for himself the first time – but he said what he SAID.

    He spends an awful lot of time liesplaining what he said for someone who thinks he should be president.

    • baconzgood

      I told my sons “if someone said ‘you hurt my feelings’ no matter how much you said you didn’t their feelings ARE hurt”.

      If everyone said “that was a veiled threat” and you say it wasn’t Donny….guess what it was…it’s not too complex of a concept to grasp. Of course my kids were a mature 3 and 4 at the time.

  • GunToting[Redacted]

    A non-violent bloodbath. Got it.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      All us wimmen folk will bleed from our wherevers on cue????

  • AnOuthouse

    Non violent bloodbaths are boring.

  • Bernarda Alba

    I have to check this but don’t think Supreme Court judges get to overturn constitutional amendments.

    • Señor Skwerl

      You are having a logic attack. Drink alcohol until conservatives makes sense.

    • Jeff in the desert

      Uh, no they don’t. That is a States right. And how the ban on alcohol was ever added as an amendment is a mystery to me. It contradicts the pursuit of happiness clause.

      • Thaumaturgist

        There is no “pursuit of happiness clause” in the constitution. You’re thinking of the Preamble, which is an aid to judicial construction, but is not actually part of the constitution sa meme.

    • Ima Witstüp

      But they might fail to overlook that part of the amendment that the NRA spells “…” on the wall of their HQ building’s lobby.

      http://i60.tinypic.com/e0juci.jpg

    • SeekingBarbie

      Further proof that Trump has not, in fact, read the Constitution. Or forgot it immediately thereafter.

  • janecita

    So, “straight shooter” is the new political correct way of saying, “fucking orange, ignorant moron with tiny, miniscule hands”? Good to know.

    • natoslug

      You forgot “pathologically incapable of making an honest statement.”

      • janecita

        That too.

  • chascates

    I just Googled Ted Nugent because who else would have a bigly comment on this but found only Ted Nugent says that if Americans don’t “get it right” in this election, he will run for president http://patch.com/michigan/plymouth-mi/ted-nugent-threatens-run-president

    Phil Robertson also said the exact same thing so if Hillary wins I call for a death cage shoot-out between Poopy Pants and Duck Dick. With votes or something.

    • natoslug

      I can’t wait for the 2020 RNC convention. If it doesn’t include dueling, I will be highly disappointed.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Hold it. He’s supposed to be dead or in jail. That promise is four years old and three years past its expiration date.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        I was wondering what that smell was.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      And we thought the 2016 GOP primary was a dumpster fire!

    • SnarkOff

      Run, Nooge run! That would be HILARIOUS.

    • VforV, I’m with Her!

      If they don’t dump the Drumpf, their bench is gonna be exactly that deep in 2020.

  • BeachBum

    I say he does all this on purpose because he is an entertainer and has an external locus of self validation. Staying on message is boring and doesn’t get him the response he wants. He can always say the media lied.

    • Jeff in the desert

      external locus of self validation…uh…where is that…..in the delta quadrant?

      • BeachBum

        I was wondering if someone would catch that. Aactually from Big Bang Theory !

    • cmd

      I’ve read that theory, too — his fans get bored when he stays on message. Lots of people opined that is why several of them just casually walked out of the rally half-way yesterday (the rally after the Second Amendment remarks). The theory was that maybe one of the reasons he comes up with the crazy stuff is that is what it takes to keep them interested and bloodthirsty.

      • Shan the Libtart

        At this rate, he’ll be blowing horses before the first debate.

        • theblackdog

          Definitely animal abuse.

  • boyblue122

    He clearly said that AFTER Hillary becomes president people should take action. Didnt mention anything about getting out to vote beforehand

    • PhattElvis

      He also said that whatever it was he meant they should do would be “horrible.” Even that anal fissure would never say that “voting” or lobbying would be “horrible.” He was talking about assassinating Hillary.

      • cmd

        In some news stories, the quote is that it would be horrible if she got to pick the judges.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Tangential SC question, since a lot of this election seems to be about the SC.

    There’s been serious questions about whether RBG, having officiated at a gay wedding, and been openly critical of Trump, should recuse herself from decisions concerning Trump and/or gay marriage.

    OK then, does that mean that if you nominate a judge based on their opposition to Roe v Wade, affirmative action, voting rights, universal healthcare or gun control, they should recuse themselves from all those decisions? That any litmus test should be ultimately self-defeating?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      IOKIYAR

    • Beaumarchais?

      If Scalia didn’t recuse himself after going hunting with Cheney who had a case in front of him, I’d say RBG is on solid ground. And you’re right about litmus tests.

    • jowgajen

      That’s the classic “she doesn’t look like me and/or doesn’t think like me so shouldn’t be allowed to vote” argument.

    • VforV, I’m with Her!

      Here’s the ‘thug view: No, it’s not the same thing, because what you believe in is wrong, and what we believe in is right.

      Ditto “activist judgest” — it’s only activist if if results in butthurt on their part.

    • Thaumaturgist

      Forgot, Lefty, that RBG is a woman. Has to recuse herself whenever a women’s’ issue comes up. Natch.

      • Shan the Libtart

        Shouldn’t most of the men as well? Conflict of interest?

        • Thaumaturgist

          (I said “Natch.”)

          • Shan the Libtart

            You made me snort.

  • Jim Johnson

    Assassination is such an ugly word! “Second Amendment remedies” is a much better dog whistle tune. “Stand your ground: for freedom” sounds more like what a proper establishment Republican would say.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Yeah. So now he’s William fucking Blake, and we’ll unravel his poetic metaphors in a 100 years or so. Great.

    • Panika MCD

      Blake was also an artist, though, so the ramblings of Shrub combined with his paintings make him more of the Blake here. TrumpleWiltSkins is more of a John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochest–only not funny.

      if you want to see something really fun, look up the war between Rochester and Dryden because Rochester was a wee bit pissed that Dryden got the poet laureate gig over his own dirty ditties.

  • JohnBull

    They don’t agree? Makes sense. These people don’t agree on where the sun goes at night.

  • anwisok
    • janecita

      Oh my fucking Lord, I really want that fluffy donkey!! Where is my wallet??

      • Slavakitty

        So much fluff!

      • Objectifer

        No, no you don’t. They don’t stay fluffy and cute. Trust me on this, burros are a real PITA.

      • pstockholm

        Donkey ate it probably.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    And here we were, worried that all the excitement in Rio would take Donald off the front page.

  • Panika MCD

    I know that these people aren’t on Wonkette so they don’t know about the “with votes!” rule, but it seems that when anyone says these things (Sarah Palin, Sharon Engle, whoever) they always say they meant it that way. so why don’t they do it right in the speech in the first place instead of always sounding like a slightly less unhinged version of Kory Watkins* here?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMgkqYe7b64

    *Kory is not actually eligible to legally own any firearms, but does anyway. http://www.star-telegram.com/opinion/opn-columns-blogs/bud-kennedy/article10243031.html

    • Hairstrike Alpha

      That….HAT. What is with that fucking hat? Does he think he’s inbred Scarface or something?

  • SnarkOff

    Let’s assume for a moment that the media is really literal and doesn’t understand irony, and that Trump really was just making a joke. Why on Earth would he think that a presidential candidate making an assassination joke is OK?

    • Jeff in the desert

      you used that think thing again…

    • BigCSouthside

      Because he never mentally developed beyond 4th grade

      • Jeff in the desert

        grade school libelz!!!!

    • Jeff in the desert

      These things come to him as he speaks, he ad libs, and doesn’t judge the content, just that he is being clever knowing the wing nuts love it.

      • sw19womble

        … and that he’s yet to be punished for ‘going too far’

        • VforV, I’m with Her!

          There is no “too far.” As long as he has his propaganda monkeys coming out afterwards denying that he meant what he said, the media can stroke their beards, nod sagely, and continue the circus. This shit is GREAT for ratings!

          • Hemp Dogbane

            Maybe not, but he may have achieved a sit-down with the Secret Service where it is explained what it would take for him to be arrested, and how close he has come so far.

      • SeekingBarbie

        Then he waits for the trumpsplainers to come up with something and adopts that as what he really meant.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Imagine four years of this complete bullshit. Are you registered to vote yet?

    • Catstro

      And if registered, have you checked to make sure that you haven’t been purged from the rolls?

      Also if anyone you know needs help getting registered, help!

  • Jeff in the desert

    I am having to use the libelz thing a lot today because there is nothing that can measure how low the man can go and so by comparison everything is libeled.

    • SnarkOff

      libelz libel!

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    So Count Orlock just inadvertently admitted Trump is a fascist demagogue heading up violence ideating tiny brained assholes who cheer for over calls to assassination? Here I was giving the crowd a little credit for its puzzled non-reaction….

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Yep, once again I’d like any wingnut or gun humper to explain to me WHY it makes sense for the US government to essentially empower its citizens to destroy it and furthermore, to make overthrowing the government part of the Bill of RIGHTS? Please someone explain to me how ANY of this makes sense.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Balance of power? Congress makes the laws, the President executes the laws, the courts interpret the laws, and Cletus, because he spent all his money on assault rifles, has the power to spray the whole place with bullets.

      • Shan the Libtart

        Whew….ouch.

      • Hairstrike Alpha

        Wingnuts have been saying this for YEARS to the point where it’s an article of faith among them and it DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE! Why would the US government give citizens the RIGHT to violently overthrow it if some out of power faction does not like it? I mean, it’s proscribed that we can vote to change power peacefully but why would it make sense to rank violently overthrowing the government as being MORE important than peacefully changing the government through voting….in a system specifically designed to work that way! I mean, just the mere idea that you have the RIGHT recognized by the government to violently overthrow the government is RETARDED! Ugh, wingnuts make my brain hurt sometimes…

        • Villago Delenda Est

          They miss that George Washington used the militia to suppress the Whiskey Rebellion, which was essentially a bunch of proto-sovcits claiming that the law didn’t apply to THEM.

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        They have not the slightest interest in a balance of powers. A balance of terror suits them just fine though…

      • PhattElvis

        The 2nd Amendment was promulgated for two reasons: To create an army to defend the Republic from The Brits and to put down slave revolts. (It’s in the legislative history; look it up.) Great Britain is the only government that is supposed to get overthrown under the 2nd Amendment.

        The whole entire rest of the document sets up a system of voting and PEACEFUL TRANSFER OF POWER, you know, American Democracy, in which we peacefully overthrow the government every 2-6 years!

        It makes perfect sense, however, that these gun humpers promote policies that make it easier to get guns than to vote. They don’t believe in peaceful self-governance. They believe in government by brute force. They’re seditious, fascist motherfuckers, the opposite of loyal Americans.

        • Amy!

          Those two, plus one more: armed amateurs to fight the indigenes when those natives objected to having their land taken. See “Jackson, Andrew, career of”, for example.

    • BeachBum

      They hate democracy. Just want everything their way.

    • anna rampage

      Seeing that many of these militia folks who plan on overthrowing the govt consider themselves to be sovereign citizens. It makes me wonder why they are trying to defend a constitution of a country that they do not claim to be a citizen of…

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Indeed. What is it they profess to love? It certainly isn’t the United States.

      • SisterArtemis

        That same bad-logic flag has been running through my head for quite a while now in reading about the SCs. I haz a confuze everytime it comes up.

      • Jim Johnson

        Those “militia folks” would hardly be considered a “well regulated militia”. They call themselves a militia, but they are more like a “gang” of misguided anarchists and drama queens. Oh, and they love their guns. being macho and fantasizing about being heros more than anything.

    • Jim Johnson

      In the context of a “well regulated militia” it makes some sense in a “last resort balance of power” way. If someone with the temperament of a two-bit dictator would become President, a well-armed, well-regulated militia could stage a coup and correct the situation and get our constitutional republic back on track. But, the electoral college is probably a better safety valve, and auto-correct feature, to keep that from happening anyway.
      Having unprincipled lunatic gun lovers (like a Ted Nugent) and lone assassins trying to “correct” our government is just not a good idea and makes no sense as you say. Individual kooks would like to take the law into their own hands, but offer no real solutions — just drama. The Framers of the Constitution had this figured out, but the gun manufacturer’s trade association, propaganda, and lobbying group, the NRA, distorts and intentionally misinterprets the Second Amendment as a marketing slogan to sell more guns and ammo to the wingnuts and gun lovers.

      • Hairstrike Alpha

        Still doesn’t make any sense- why would the government legally empower people to violently overthrow it and ensconce this right into the Bill of Rights? Maybe I give the Founders too much credit because while the original constitution was highly flawed it was incredibly brilliant and forward thinking in that it can be amended. I just don’t see why they’d put into place an Amendment with such sweeping power that they’d A) make it unlimited and B) say absolutely nothing about the right to legally overthrow the government.
        Personally, I think this entire line of thought is the creation of butthurt ex-Confederates and has promulgated a culture of people who just don’t understand that open rebellion is neither legal nor is it to be romanticized.

        • Jim Johnson

          I think provisions for “overthrow” are well considered to prevent the rise of a dictatorship that would subvert their ideals for a democratic republic. They certainly weren’t advocating mob rule or a chaotic rebellion leading to a chaotic overthrow and anarchy. But, if “We the People” find that a two-bit dictator has taken power and is actively violating our constitution and trying to establish a dictatorship it is perfectly reasonable that we should (and must) fight back.This is not a job for assassination hit squads, lone gunmen, Chuck Norris wannabes, “confederates”, or automatic weapons loving drama queens. We would need a properly armed, well regulated militia to do the job and restore our Constitutional form of government.

          • HazooToo

            Could this well-regulated militia be identified more specifically as the US military? They are under no obligation to follow orders that are clearly illegal, after all.

          • Jim Johnson

            Good point. I think there are some decent people in the military that would competently handle the worst case scenario of a dictatorship/kingship problem. Some even said outright that they would not follow some of the DummFührers illegal command if he, God forbid, ever took over the Presidency. The state-by-state National Guards came from this intent, but they have moved too close to the Federal government control to be independant enough if the dictator had control of the US military. This article describes the Constitutional intent rather well: What America’s gun fanatics won’t tell you

          • HazooToo

            Thank you, I read that once, but I forgot to save it. In the favorites, now! Personally, I trust the military enough to believe they would do the right thing if, somehow, a mad, possibly-orange lunatic took over the country and declared himself President-For-Life. The hypothetical Dictator in question would have a hard time controlling a military comprised solely of US citizens who presumably still have loved ones depending on them for protection. Soldiers tend to want to make their country proud.

          • Hairstrike Alpha

            Right but I mean the Constitution with its various checks and balances and levers is in and of itself the ultimate defense against dictatorship. In order to become a dictator you have to essentially go the Hitler route and invalidate all the democratic processes so if you do that then the 2nd Amendment itself becomes utterly invalid so again, it does not make sense. I agree with you in principle but I just again think this particular argument was given rise out of the ashes of the butthurt Confederates and was further advanced by butthurt white supremacists angry about desegregation and federal ‘encroachments’ on their Jim Crow libertahs in the South and in the West, cattle ranchers angry that the gummint says there are limits to how much land theyze allowed to use. That in and of itself is a giant discussion….

          • Jim Johnson

            The original intent surely has been distorted over the years and inappropriately used as butthurt salve for sure. Very misguided. If Orange Julius Caesar ever deceived the electorate to the point of getting elected (October surprise?) I am hopeful that the Electoral College would intervene and avoid the disaster of a Drumpfenfuhrer “Presidency”.
            Hopefully, it would not fall to the US military or the National Guards, since we do not have a well regulated militia to get us back on track. The gun loving Ted Nugents, Bundy Bros, and other sociopathic Sovereign Citizens or neo-confederates are certainly not part of the solution; they are the problem.

        • M Dubs

          I think the founding fathers knew as well as we do that the only way to stop the military and surveillance of a tyrannical government is a delusional redneck who can’t go outside because the vapor trails from airplanes are controlling his mind.

          And yes, the founding fathers knew about chemtrails. That’s just how deep the rabbit hole goes.

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      George Washington knew how to handle those who refused to recognize federal authority-get out the army. How’d the whole 2nd Amendment solution work out for those Kentucky distillers?

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Wingnuts say “We live in the greatest country in the in the world! Our laws, freedoms, and system of government are the envy of everyone!”

      Yet they also say that they need the 2nd Amendment to resist government tyranny and overreach.

      So which is it? Either you live in a undemocratic shithole where power hungry extremists are barely being kept in check by the fear of an armed and vigilant citizenry, or you love your fucking guns more than you love your country. You can’t have it both ways.

    • Jim Johnson

      I’m just trying to explain this as someone who thinks the wingnuts, gun humpers, and the NRA distort the true intent of the Second Amendment to justify their fantasies, rationalize their odd love of guns to sell and own more guns and ammo. I’m sure my explanation would never go over well with them. You’ll never get a rational explanation of this from them, but that doesn’t mean there can’t be clarity on how the Second Amendment should be interpreted. We’ll need some better Supreme Court justices for that. Thus the death threats against Clinton over appointments.

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    I think they’re settling on this interpretation of Trump’s words: After Hillary is elected, and after she names her SCOTUS nominee(s), there’s nothing you personally can do, but the NRA can do something, with their very persuasive lobbying, they can convince her to change her mind and nominate a judge of their choice. “But I tell you what, that will be a horrible day.”

    • PhattElvis

      The “horrible day” punctuation, also a hedge, made it clear that Trump was NOT talking about gun nuts voting or sitting in or making rallies and lobbying all peaceful-like.

      He was saying, “It would be horrible if you idiots went and killed Hillary now, so don’t go around telling anyone I told you to do that after you kill her. Thanks!”

    • cleos_mom

      It will be a truly horrible day when most people believe that line.

  • bubbuhh

    In the good old days, the GOPee would nominate some rich white guy who thought being rich and white was a sign of God’s Grace and who might think he was destined to be President as the fulfillment of Divine Prophecy. He would be kind of stupid. For instance, he might drive a few hundred miles with the family dog strapped to the roof of his car cuz why not? Or, he might be kind of brainlazy, letting his VP tell him what to do, and landing the USA in a war to capture imaginary nukes and other bad things.

    Nowadayz they run a muckhead like Trump. He might manage all these things and so much more in his first 100 days.

  • calliecallie

    I was going to make a Pelican Brief joke, but really the whole idea of 2nd amendmenting anyone is so off-putting, I just can’t.

  • Hairstrike Alpha

    Thought of the day: If a woman has sex with Donald Trump and she puts a mark on her bed post in proportion to his endowment, is the mark so tiny no one besides she can see it? Discuss.

  • Nightcrawler

    Trump supporters say he “speaks his mind and means what he says” but now they want to backpedal with what he said now?

    • Gentle Robot

      Their story is always “the media is twisting his words.”
      This morning a Trumpster told me “you can’t quote meaning” when I said he’s been quoted accurately.

  • Hemp Dogbane

    Jesse Ventura used to say “Joke, Joke, Joke”immediately after saying something outrageously stupid to the media jackals.

  • Astraea

    You can go mad yourself trying to find any consistency or reason in a narcissist. It’s as pointless as trying to grab a handful of air. Did he mean it? Does he even understand what he said? Is it calculated or just spontaneous outbursts? Reasonable questions for someone who thinks in a normal way. Narcissists operate so differently

    ETA: Goddamn Disqus I wasn’t even sure I wanted to post. Oh well, maybe this makes some sense.

    • Shan the Libtart

      And if they don’t like your interpretation of what they said, they just start in with the gas lighting. BTDT.

      • Astraea

        Yeah, what they “really meant” is always shifting and is entirely beside the point to them anyway.

      • cleos_mom

        I don’t know if that’s in the definition of “narcissist” but it should be, consistent as it is.

  • It’s hardly our fault that wingnuts invented and popularized the term “Second Amendment remedy” and turned mention of the 2A into a call for political assassinations.

    • SullivanSt

      Explaining Trump would first require that he actually truly meant anything at all. I’ve seen no evidence that he does, but the truly determined indifference to the consequences of his words is just as damning.

  • SeekingBarbie

    President Trump would need an Explainer Translator to follow him around–like Obama’s Anger Translator, only for real.

  • Thaumaturgist

    Once you legitimize assassination, you legitimize your own assassination. Stupidnik didn’t think of that.

    • PhattElvis

      I want to give you “Yes, POINTS!!!” but I’m afraid of what it would mean if I did.

      • Paperless Tiger

        There you go again, thinking before you act. What kind of pussycat are you?

    • beavertank

      Clearly strategery isn’t Trump’s bigly strength.

    • Amy!

      You know, over and over, during the primary campaign (but especially during that disaster of a convention), I thought “some unhinged goober on that side is gonna decide to solve the GOP’s candidate problem by watering the tree of liberty,” but every time I thought of a snarky way to say it, I realized: this sounds like a threat to a candidate for president. Which is not only unethical, immoral, possibly illegal, and ill-advised, it’s against the commenting rules. Well. So of course I couldn’t say anything.

      Seriously (-ish), what the fuck kind of fucking idiot politician suggests that guns are a good solution for electoral fucking problems? It has to be a raging narcissist (cf Sarah Palin), someone utterly without empathy and imagination, because the idea of promoting violence against people in the position that you are running for is just fucking nuts.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    But Elizabeth Warren called Trump a coward, so you know: Both sides!

    https://twitter.com/tripgabriel/status/763133065489182720

    • beavertank

      I wasn’t aware that pointing out someone’s clear cowardice was somehow “the same level” as making veiled death threats to your opponent. Huh. Learn something every day I guess.

    • Jim Johnson

      Wow, double-digit Twitter action. This guy must be an “influencer.”

      • UnsaltedSinner

        He’s a reporter for the liberal New York Times.

    • Jim Johnson

      Probably a sneaky Muslin. Didn’t Mohammed have some kind of visionary “Gabriel Trip”?

  • AncienReggie

    Is it too late for the Republicans to drop Trump and put Kim Jong Un and the ticket, instead?

    • Gleem-McShinez

      Great idea! Especially because he doesn’t have any of those problems of “negative opinions” about him, unlike Donald Trump! He can’t lose!

      • phoenix00

        Except Dennis Rodman will be Ambassador to the USA

  • Parchment Scroll

    I love how Drumpf is telling those who support the 2nd Amendment to vote… after Hillary has won, been sworn in, and made her SCOTUS picks.

    • SullivanSt

      I for one am quite content for him to be telling “2nd Amendment People” that election day is January 21st.

      • phoenix00

        as long as they don’t bring their guns…..

  • WhyFelicia

    If I hadn’t heard a clip of the statement, I would just assume he was having another stroke. None of those words in that order, in print, seem like something that a native speaker of English would say.

    • Catstro

      It’s positively Faulknerian.

    • He speaks fluent Narcissist. It’s similar to English, but things are in a different order. For instance, the first two letters of the alphabet are “ME”.

  • hendenburg2

    In one of the more out-there opinions I’ve seen, someone at Slate was speculating that Trump was actually purposefully implying that gunhumpers are unhinged loons

  • SullivanSt

    Also, maybe he should send out some kind of memo or something telling his people what the party line on the weird thing he’s gonna say is, so they can actually do a good job of pretending they all totally understand exactly what he meant and that the media is totally just misinterpreting everything?

    This would, of course, require that he knew what he was going to say before he said it. Since he still doesn’t know what he’s going to say after he’s watched the video of him saying it, that seems quite unlikely.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    I’m heartily sick of the whole “Love the sinner, hate the sin” bullshit the christianistas and the right pull. The man is obviously unfit to be president however you chose to interpret his rantings.

  • Khavrinen

    “people will need to peacefully lobby their legislators”

    So, Colt is changing the name of their most famous revolver to “Peace Lobbier”?

    • Jim Johnson

      It’s not a revolver it’s a “resolver”.

    • M Dubs

      My guns are called Civil Litigation and Passive Breathing.

  • Paperless Tiger

    It’s like watching a cat try to cover a turd.

  • ltmcdies

    well according to John Harwood…the Secret Service has had a chat with Trump’s campaign about his …language.
    https://twitter.com/JohnJHarwood/status/763450598658306048

  • Jim Johnson

    Maybe Drumpf should phone in these speeches as a John Miller or John Barron spokesweasel. Then he, and his minions, can easily disavow his stupid comments.

    • Bitter Scribe

      He already does the “Lots of people are saying” trick over and over. And over.

      • SisterArtemis

        It always reminds me of this repeating thing in the 1996 version of “Emma” (don’t remember if it’s in the book) – Mrs. Elton did a lot of “I myself do not say… but others have said….”

        On the fly, here’s the only quote I found in the imdb page, but it has the flavor

        Mrs. Elton: I do not profess to be an expert in the field of fashion (though my friends say I have quite the eye) but I can tell you, there is a shocking lack of satin!

        • WomanInAMood

          OMG, Mrs. Elton! One of the funniest characters ever! Because of her, I have always wanted a barouche-landau of my very own. Mostly so that I can say barouche-landau very, very frequently.

          • SisterArtemis

            It’s the only way to HAVE a barouche-landau – one MUST mention it very, very, frequently!

          • WomanInAMood

            If only my sister Selena would stop bragging about it.

          • SisterArtemis

            best I could do on short notice.

          • WomanInAMood

            Yep, I definately want one. Just the thing for my commute!

        • SisterArtemis

          funny, took a few precious seconds away from Wonketting, and spotted this post from Crooks and Liars

          Ha! Twitter Trolls Trump’s ‘Many People Tell Me’

      • cleos_mom

        He got that from Faux Noise and their “some say” mantra.

  • Bitter Scribe

    He’ll be a great president. Our adversaries will be so busy trying to figure out what the hell he said, and what the hell it means, that they’ll be too tired to attack us.

    • Jim Johnson

      On the downside, they will probably unfriend us.

  • Jennaratrix

    Here’s the thing. Every time he says something, it’s worse than the last thing he said; and we, all of us, even those of us who are horrified by the shit coming out this man’s mouth, become less horrified about the things he’s already said. His worldview and his opinions are normalized over time by each comment being worse than the last, and making earlier comments sound sane and reasonable by comparison.

    Yesterday he hinted someone should assassinate Hillary Clinton. Last week he was saying the mother of a slain soldier wasn’t allowed to speak because of her religion. Last month he tweeted an attack ad with a six-point star, invoking the Holocaust. Last year he made fun of a disabled reporter. Earlier he had said he only considers members of the military who weren’t held as POWs heroes. Years before that he objectified women and called once he considers unattractive pigs.

    Any single one of these is unacceptable. Beyond the pale. Over a firmly drawn line. Indicative of a person who under no circumstances should be in a position of authority over a pet hamster, never mind a country. But in the aggregate they seem so ridiculous as to not be real, and they have numbed us. The relentless spewing of garbage has worn out our outrage-o-meters. We now EXPECT him to say something worse tomorrow or next week, and we won’t be surprised when it happens.

    This is bad. And if I thought he was smart enough, I’d say he’s doing it all on purpose. That he’s a brilliant, manipulative man using psychology to run a huge experiment purely for his own amusement, proving that Americans are just fucking stupid enough to elect him to national office as a way to make a point. What that point would be is up for discussion.

    But he’s not. He’s an (allegedly) rich, narcissistic, pathetic, lying old man who understands just enough about mob mentality to work it to his advantage. And those of us with the capacity to be outraged are being worn down by the worst people in our country. I’m increasingly feeling like there’s nothing I can do, and depressed beyond ability to express that so many people I personally know have been so bamboozled. It doesn’t say positive things about humanity in general, and it’s killing my lifelong belief that no matter what, most people are good. Because this man has said things that any decent, reasonable, empathetic and rational human being should find morally reprehensible, and people I believed were all of those things are defending him.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Call him the Overton Cheeto.

    • Zyxomma

      There IS something you can do: Vote, and GOTV.

      • Jennaratrix

        I plan to, and I made sure my husband registered to vote for the first time in his life. But does that seem like enough? It doesn’t to me. The – what, mom? fixer? control freak? – in me wants to FIX this. Wants to drill the stupidity right out of people’s brains, because those idiots are dangerous for the rest of us. I feel like it’s not enough for me and those who are like me to see what’s going on, we have to try to make other people see it, too. I know that’s not realistic, but that’s where my frustration springs from.

    • bookish

      I understand. I’m having the same surprise and confusion over a couple of my friends. I rationalize it by saying they are ardent Fox News watchers, but that shouldn’t be enough, should it? I can’t find any other explanation.

    • phoenix00

      OTOH, there’s also something called Stockholm Syndrome.

      • Jennaratrix

        So we’re all drinking the Kool-Aid because our psyches have forced us to fall in love with Pmurt so we don’t go completely crazy? Interesting!

  • boyblue122

    Yes President Trump has fired a nuke at your country and turned it into dust, but he didnt really mean it.

    -Trump PR team right before Armageddon, probably

    • Jim Johnson

      “Well excuuuuse me! Just a little typo guys. No need to take it so personally. Geez, why so PC?” -Katrina Pierson

      • SisterArtemis

        “Now then, Dmitri, you know how we’ve always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Bomb… The *Bomb*, Dmitri…”

        • eddi

          “Dmitri, stop crying…”

    • masked mumbler

      Trump is even dumber/more self-absorbed than the spy in Get Smart, and millions of people want him to be POTUS. This thought made more anxious than I’ve been in a very long time.

  • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

    Trump minion reacts to hearing he’s been tweeting again…

    https://youtu.be/fTHL0MAWkmY

  • epzik8

    You know, Donald Trump is causing me to view other Republicans like George W. Bush, Mitt Romney and quite possibly even Ben Carson and Ted Cruz more favorably than I have before. I mean, did Bush ever attack Al Gore or John Kerry like this? Did McCain or Romney ever attack Obama like this? I mean, Bush and Obama managed to SHAKE HANDS! We all know Bush made some questionable decisions while in the White House, but Donald Trump is making W. Bush look good in comparison. Trump is too much of a moron to be willing to act civil toward Hillary.

    • M Dubs

      Don’t. Don’t do that.

      The line I keep coming back to that was said about this election is that “George W Bush was a terrible president, but at least he was terrible within normal parameters.” And this is true, but terrible within normal parameters is still terrible.

      • WomanInAMood

        Was that PJ O’Roarke?

        • M Dubs

          I couldn’t remember, but it seems it is. The full quote is actually about Hillary, not Bush.

          “She’s wrong about absolutely everything, but she’s wrong within normal parameters.”

          • WomanInAMood

            OK, that is O’Rourke. I am not a fan, but I distinctly remember him saying it on WWDTM, and being surprised.

  • Mezzaluna

    Late as usual but I have to rant. Please bear with me.
    “If you can’t have an honest election, nothing else counts,”
    No, asshole that’s not what’s happening here. In your mind, if you can’t get what you want, the election is invalid. My vote is invalid. Millions of other voters opinions and efforts are invalid if you lose. Well, fuck you, you creamsicle colored sea cucumber. Get the fuck out of my country, you embarrassment of a human being. Take your fucking ignorant, self destructive little shit birds with you because I have fucking had it with the deliberate stupidity, the childish lies, everything you offer and represent. You are a cheap ass, Nouveau Riche, addle pated, self obsessed toad stool. By toad stool I mean toad excrement, not a fungus. Your supporters make me sad that I share a country with them. Fuck them with a rotary lawn mower made of votes.
    There. I feel a little better.

    • WomanInAMood

      I have nothing to say, except that you are 100% correct. Thank you.

    • Plushinobi

      “Fuck them with a rotary lawnmower made of votes” is an amazing phrase.

    • jmk

      This was magnificent.

    • Dee Andee

    • Smibo

      You had me at “creamsicle colored sea cucumber”.

  • bookish

    The Secret Service states it contacted the Trump campaign, more than once, regarding Trump statements, including his recent 2nd Amendment comment. Trump denies this. He just called the folks tasked with protecting him, liars.

    • bookish

      They need to shake him until his teeth rattle.

  • Dee Andee

    Fuck this fucking sociopath already. He’s trying to gaslight an entire nation.
    From http://narcissisticbehavior.net/the-effects-of-gaslighting-in-narcissistic-victim-syndrome/ :

    “Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse used by narcissists in order to instill in their victim’s an extreme sense of anxiety and confusion to the point where they no longer trust their own memory, perception or judgment. The techniques used in
    “Gaslighting” by the narcissist are similar to those used in brainwashing, interrogation, and torture that have been used in psychological warfare by intelligence operative, law enforcement and other forces for decades.

    The intention is to, in a systematic way, target the victim’s mental equilibrium, self confidence, and self esteem so that they are no longer able to function in an independent way. Gaslighting involves the abuser to frequently and systematically
    withhold factual information from the victim, and replacing it with
    false information. Because of it’s subtly, this cunning Machiavellian
    behaviour is a deeply insidious set of manipulations that is difficult
    for anybody to work out, and with time it finally undermines the mental
    stability of the victim. That is why it is such a dangerous form of
    abuse. The emotional damage of Gaslighting is huge on the narcissistic
    victim. When they are exposed to it for long enough, they begin to lose
    their sense of their own self. Unable to trust their own judgments, they
    start to question the reality of everything in their life. They begin
    to find themselves second-guessing themselves, and this makes them
    become very insecure around their decision making, even around the
    smallest of choices. The victim becomes depressed and withdrawn, they
    become totally dependent on the abuser for their sense of reality. In
    effect the gaslighting turns the victim’s reality on its head.”

    • phoenix00

      One can argue this has been part of the Repub MO for at least a decade.

      • BeachBum

        I say since 1964 when they said only the states can protect Constitutional Rights. And lots of other crap.

    • cleos_mom

      And it might be worth noting that the term comes from the title of a play where a man tries to drive his wife insane by manipulating circumstances to make her believe that she is losing her sanity.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    And we shouldn’t suggest that his inability to make a statement that isn’t wildly misinterpreted by like, well, everyone, is an argument against his suitability to be president.

  • Ugh. This is already SO NICE, everyone.

    If Trump doesn’t win, EVERYTHING IS RIGGED, BURN EVERYTHING DOWN!

    …Seems like we just got through with something like that, didn’t we? Was I naive to believe that we had put that bullshit behind us? At least I was never afraid that Bernie supporters might feel the need to “water the tree of liberty” but not euphemistically and not with votes. These yahoos, on the other hand. . .

    • phoenix00

      If he wins, burn everything down cuz that’s what he said he’d do.

  • bookish

    If his position is precarious, even his fiercest critics believe it’s too early to write him off.

  • cleos_mom

    Since the goobs are now insisting that they purpose of the Second Amendment was to arm citizens against Da Gubber Mint, maybe we should be persistently asking Trump supporters exactly which government officials and which cops they want to shoot.

    • BeachBum

      Right, cause all we have to go on was what happened from 1860-1865.

      • cleos_mom

        Oddly enough, the past 18 months or so have moved “never stopped fighting the Civil War” right into the most heavily-traveled routes.

        O/T, it’s ridiculously easy for a population to “forget” a war it’s won. Even those who have lost family members can usually be appeased by medals and rhetoric of the floral variety.

  • Frank

    No fair! The US Constitution is Trump’s favorite constitution OF ALL TIME!!!! He knows the TWO Amendment is the whole ball game. That’s where the ONE Amendment comes into play as well because 1+1=2. Trump made absolutely clear pro-2A documented citizens can go big to stop Hillary by only using their 1A to vote for TP or occupy the Supreme Court (SEND SNACKS & DILDOS!)

  • fauxnombre1

    Does anyone remember the movie ‘Being There’?I’m sure Trump is Chancy GARDENER.

  • fauxnombre1

    For someone with such small hands he sure steps on his d—k a lot.

  • motmelere

    The common sense and law & order clown show should be enough to anger and scare the shit out of every American. Oh well, the mushroom cloud over Gary, Indiana will have an asterisk claiming that pussies can’t take a joke.

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