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And 1964 never happened
And 1964 never happened

Wingnut America is rather torn on how to react to Wednesday’s news that Harriet Tubman will be replacing Andrew Jackson on the front of the $20 bill. The most openly racist nutbags, like the nice volks at the Daily Stormer, are at least honest: Under a banner celebrating the Fuhrer’s birthday (and you hippies thought 4/20 was just for pot!), they’re not the least bit shy about their feelings:

Daily Stormer tubman

Haw Haw! Needless to say, the Daily Stormer is out of the mainstream, and you’d never catch a respectable conservative blog tolerating racist discourse, no way! Consider this perfectly accurate headline from the Stupidest Man on the Internet, Jim Hoft:

gateway pundit Tubman

Clearly, even though the announcement was made by Treasury Secretary Jack Lew, it was really Obama who forced a great American Hero off the $20 and replaced him with a nobody. After blockquoting much of Politico’s story on the new $20 bills (dude writes as little as possible himself), Hoft adds, “For the record… Much Harriet Tubman’s story is likely made up” [sic] — the link goes to a grumpy debunking of several myths about Tubman and the Underground Railroad found in history textbooks.

This is how Hoft works: He doesn’t need to say anything racist, because his readers will take care of that themselves. A whole lot of them wanted to talk about what an ugly old black lady Harriet Tubman was:

  • She looks like Aunt Jemima. Now you won’t be able to tell twenties from food stamps.
  • She looked like obozo!s mother-in-law. Aunt Jemima is beautiful compare to that dog.
  • Isn’t that Moochelle’s Mama…
  • Can you guess how many of them will be defaced… and how fast?
    As much as they try to rid the enword from our language, this will increase it’s use exponentially.
  • this will go the way of the sacagawea golden dollar. i will not accept a twenty dollar bill until it has jackson back on it. give me 10’s and 50’s…i’ll deal with it…you should too. these self serving racist do gooders must be stopped
  • I would think the EBT card would be more appropriate.
  • too bad they couldn’t find a Black that was famous for something besides the racial issues.
  • Celebrating illegal immigration with currency that Obama has devalued to Zimbabwe levels

We’re guessing that last one was a reference to Tubman helping slaves escape to Canada? Or maybe simply from the Confederacy into the Union? BUILD THE WALL!

There was also this scholarly dialogue between two readers:

How about Booker T. Washington? He wanted blacks to get educations and jobs.

You mean the “terrific ten” or whatever he called it?

To get 10% of highly functioning blacks to ascend into white society by showing how smart they are and the other 90% will follow?

Problem was, there isn’t 10% of blacks that are highly functioning and the remaining 90% are unable to function in any sustained and meaningful way.

The bulk of black America hovers right around the cutoff between Dull and Average intelligence.

Never mind that it was the “talented tenth” and the term was used mostly by W.E.B. DuBois — those people all look the same anyway.

Then there were the visual humorists!

gateway pundit Tubman comment

For some reason, the staff thought it might be a good idea to post a little reminder about what’s not allowed at the Gateway Pundit:

gateway pundit Tubman warning

And we’ll give them this much credit: They removed many of the comments listed above, including the images. So we guess it was really unfair of us to capture them before they were deleted, huh? Shame on us. We’ll give Hoft this much credit: He knows better than to leave his readers’ dirty white sheets hanging on the line.

And then there’s Free Republic, where… You know what? Never mind. As Kid Zoom said years ago, “Dad, that’s just anger porn.”

We’re also rather fond of this discussion of the new bill at Tucker Carlson’s Internet Concern:

daily Caller Tubman

Yeah, Jackson “removed some Native Americans from their land.” And Hitler caused some Jews to have respiratory difficulties.

Then there’s the attempt to belittle Tubman through de-mythologizing her; that’s the approach taken by James Fulford at racist clearinghouse VDare last year when the proposal to replace Jackson got rolling. Cribbing heavily from a 2004 review by James McPherson of several Tubman biographies, Fulford points out all sorts of supposedly terrible things about this supposed hero, like the fact that she was illiterate, and that her only four known letters were dictated. Egad! An illiterate former slave? How could anyone find her admirable?

Where McPherson and the biographers he reviews sought only to sort out the knowable facts of Tubman’s life from the myths that have grown up around her, Fulford goes that extra step and tries to suggest Tubman never really amounted to much. Fulford concentrates only on her work as an abolitionist and rescuer of slaves, completely ignoring her service in the Union Army as a soldier, spy, and nurse during the Civil War. McPherson notes that she led black Union troops in a raid in 1863 that “destroyed Confederate resources and brought out 750 slaves;” Fulford not so much. McPherson also points out that, following a Union assault on Fort Wagner, Tubman provided care to the wounded of the 54th Massachusetts Infantry, the regiment celebrated in the movie Glory — although she didn’t make it into the movie, so maybe Fulford considered it unimportant.

Instead, Fulford concentrates on parts of the “Moses” myth that he can downplay, because why would anyone make a hero out of some illiterate slave lady who never accomplished that much anyway:

  • Tubman was said to have led 300 slaves to freedom—McPherson makes it between 57 and 70.
  • Many of the fugitives Tubman conducted north were her relatives. That would make her the Moses of her family, rather than of her people.
  • Tubman was said to have had a reward of $10, 000, $12, 000, or even $40, 000 for her recapture—the last figure would be equivalent to more than a million dollars today. The largest reward actually posted was $100.

Well then. She merely rescued between 50 and 70 people from slavery, and quite a few of them were relatives. And later biographers exaggerated her exploits? That’s simply appalling! Next you’ll be telling us that George Washington was capable of telling a lie.

Fulford even manages to find something problematic in the fact that Tubman was able to help the anti-slavery cause despite having survived a brain injury:

Tubman suffered from some “temporal lobe epilepsy” or “narcolepsy” or possibly “cataplexy” as a result of a head injury. Symptoms, as described by McPherson: “[F]or the rest of her life Harriet would periodically lose consciousness and appear to fall asleep, sometimes for only a few seconds, sometimes for several minutes, and then awaken to carry on as if nothing had happened.” This really terrified the people she was supposed be rescuing—and raises questions about how much she could really have done.

Not mentioned by Fulford: McPherson points out how Tubman suffered that head injury:

When she was twelve or thirteen she was sent to work in the fields. A year or two later she sustained a life-threatening head wound when an enraged overseer threw a heavy iron object at an escaping male slave and hit Harriet instead.

Oh. Can’t imagine why Fulford might have left that out. As Steve M. at No More Mister Nice Blog says, “I read this as a triumph over a serious brain injury, but your mileage may vary.”

Fulford even manages to transmute Tubman’s neurological injury into a suggestion that she was untrustworthy. McPherson says that as a result of her head injury, Tubman sometimes “experienced dreams or visions, even hallucinations, sometimes with powerful religious overtones—more than once she said that God had spoken to her.” Fulford’s take on that?

As a result, again, of the head injury related seizures, Tubman was apparently delusional.

In fact, should we believe anything she ever said about what she did? Besides, she also used the N-word, so she’s a racist:

Speaking of terrifying the people Tubman was supposed be rescuing, she didn’t actually carry a musket as pictured above, but a revolver — with which she’d threaten to shoot anyone who faltered.

Wikipedia refers to Tubman’s threats this way: “Tubman told the tale of one man who insisted he was going to go back to the plantation when morale got low among a group of fugitive slaves. She pointed the gun at his head and said, ‘You go on or die.’”[Accessed May 15, 2015] That’s the 2015 version—almost every time it was quoted before that, including in the Negro Digest in 1965, she said “Dead n*ggers tell no tales; you go on or die!”

Ultimately, Fulford concludes (coincidentally, next to a lovely ad for Confederate flags), that this decidedly unimpressive heroine is only admired because of anti-White bias:

One reason for the Tubman boom: the trend of promoting antiquarian hate against whites for hundred-year-old racism and for slavery abolished a hundred and fifty years ago.

But there’s also another, sad reason: there are so few black heroes and heroines, and they have to take what they can get.

But does the rest of America have to put up with it on the $20 dollar bill?

Happily, wingnuts who don’t want to go the racist route can take another approach: Celebrate Harriet Tubman the Republican hero! Just look at how those dumb Democrats in the Obama administration, in their attempts to be politically correct, have in reality replaced a slave-owning Democrat with a Freedom-loving, gun-toting Republican, hurrah! That’s the angle they ran with at PJ Media:

PJmedia tubman

Because just like Martin Luther King, if she were alive today, Harriet Tubman would obviously be a Republican, and a member of the NRA, too (like Maya Angelou, maybe). Why doesn’t the Liberal Media acknowledge these simple facts? Now, if you want to get all technical about it, even if, like most blacks of her era, Tubman probably would have aligned herself with the Republicans, she certainly wasn’t a registered Republican, seeing as how there were no women voting prior to the 19th amendment. Must have been liberals who held women back.

Or maybe it’s best to simply listen to the wisdom of Ben Carson, who suggested Tubman could go on the $2 bill. It’s not like there’s anyone important on there now.

Now we can hardly wait for the Deleted Commenters to show up and point out that the KKK was founded by Democrats, and of course nothing at all about the two parties ever changed after 1964. Also, Robert Byrd was in the Klan.

[Gateway Pundit / Free Republic / The Blaze / No More Mister Nice Blog / VDare / New York Review of Books (paywalled) / WaPo / PJ Media / Politico]

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  • RoyalUglyDude

    Who would have guessed the wingnuts would be less than enthusiastic about this?

    • Dr.Zoidberg

      Ooh! Ooh! I did, I did! What do I win?

  • Hutch

    Christ almighty! I figured this would be controversial, but the level of ugly racism surprises even me (and I live in Georgia)!

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Obviously, you’re the real racist for pointing this out.

    • Randy Riddle

      I live in NC. I was afraid to leave my house when they announced this.

  • beatbort

    If it’s any consolation to the wingnuts, Ayn Rand is going on the three-dollar-bill.

    • The Wanderer

      I could see her on the penny, because her deep thoughts and published writings are worth about one cent.

      Not each, either.

      • theblackdog

        Nah, bring back the half-penny and put her on that.

        • Querolous

          3/5 penny

    • Blank Ron

      On paper money? She’d never put up with that!

  • MsAnthropesMr

    Zimbabwean levels of inflation? Is that why Zimbabwe decided to scrap its money and trade in US Dollars? (Among other currency?)

    • The Wanderer

      I heard that they also accept S&H Green Stamps.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Goldbugs can see extraordinary inflation everywhere, even though we’re actually teetering on the brink of deflation and would benefit from higher inflation targets at the Fed.

  • memzilla

    In the interest of being Fairon Balanced, let’s put Ayn Rand’s face on toilet paper.

    • OddMan

      Great minds think alike, Stephen Colbert Tweeted last year, “If I was on a desert island and could only have one book, I’d choose “Atlas Shrugged.” Because that’s 1,088 pieces of toilet paper.”

  • FlownOver

    A gun-toting Republican? and “…more than once she said that God had spoken to her”? It’s amazing she never ran for president.

    • The Wanderer

      She’d have her own show on TBN at that rate.

  • doktorzoom

    It’s a pity the McPherson book review at New York Review of Books is paywalled, because there’s some great stuff in there. Not sure you wanna pay the five bucks, but it’s a good read if you’re near a university library that’d have it on microfilm. Of the assault on Ft. Wagner by the 54th Massachusetts, McPherson writes:

    Although she did not make it into the movie Glory about that event, she provided perhaps the most poetic description of it:

    And then we saw the lightning, and that was the guns; and then we heard the thunder, and that was the big guns; and then we heard the rain falling, and that was the drops of blood falling; and then we came to get in the crops, it was dead men that we reaped.

    Tubman never received regular payments or a pension for her wartime services, despite the support of several army officers and of Secretary of State William H. Seward, who testified to the valuable contributions she had made to the Union war effort. Her quest was tangled in the War Department bureaucracy, which had no record of her employment by the army.

    Then again, she dictated that description, so it doesn’t count.

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      Second the motion. Among James McPherson writes is well worth reading.

    • nightmoth

      She was a natural poet. She couldn’t read or write, but she developed a phenomenal memory, and knew hundreds of verses of the King James Bible. The rhythm and sweep of the KJV influenced her language and made her a much sought-after orator.

  • JVisconti

    If the GOP had their way, we’d be seeing corporate sponsorship ads on all the bills.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Oh dear gawd. Look, I just woke up ten minutes ago, and my coffee is still too hot to drink, so I’m just going to bypass this post until I have a bit more fortitude and stamina to handle what the headline promises.

  • The Wanderer

    My goodness, such a level of vitriol. These idiots had better watch out – stress like that can lead to strokes (and, since many of them are calamitously obese, they don’t need more health issues).

    • therblig

      The Guild of Calamitous Obesity?

  • Vecciojohn LLC

    Losers.

    • Blank Ron

      Does sum it up rather nicely, really.

      • Vecciojohn LLC

        Well, as they say, brevity is the soul of being witty and not like, you know, using a lot of extra words to make your point, as it were.

  • dslindc

    Thank you to Dok for reading and summarizing the wingnuts so I don’t have to sully my browser.

    Having read the summary:

    • nightmoth

      I know. But it’s a very pretty planet. Let’s vote the scumbags off of it.

  • FZsdaughter

    Dok, this is one of those days when your job is horrible, eh? I’d hate to have to sift through that shit with my bare hands.

  • Racist James Fulford says, “Tubman sometimes ‘experienced dreams or visions, even hallucinations, sometimes with powerful religious overtones—more than once she said that God had spoken to her.'”

    I guess what he’s saying is that she was a Huckabee/Cruz type of republican.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “Had visions…with powerful religious overtones”? Well, that is why people don’t care much for that Jeebus feller.

    • coozledad

      God did talk to her. And Fulford better hope to fuck that God doesn’t start talking to someone else.

    • doktorzoom

      Actually, that’s a quote from McPherson. Fulford translated it into “she was delusional.”

      • Duly noted. Thank’s Dok. Comment amended.

        RnW regrets the error.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Let’s put Frederick Douglas on the $10, and William Tecumseh Sherman on the $100. With Lincoln already on the $5 and Grant on the $50, this will make neo-confederate’s trips to the bank very hilarious.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      They’ll be forced to do business with their reserves of gold and Confederate scrip.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        “I’m sorry sir, but drawing a crayon portrait of Jeff Davis on a post-it note does not make it worth $20.”

    • Walter Wellstone

      That’s a great idea. Also, let’s decorate the back of those bills with scenes from the Civil War depicting Confederate troops getting their asses kicked by Union soldiers, or showing an African-American woman taking a shit on the Confederate flag in the middle of a field or something like that.

      • coozledad

        Or Confederate general Dick Ewell setting fire to Richmond, because fuck those ingrates.

      • lovelydestruction

        Please, that’s terrible visual and it disrespects more than that damn flag.

    • coozledad

      I nominate Rev. Dr. William J. Barber II to head up the NTSB.

    • BadassMcKill

      #Republicans4Bitcoin soon

  • DerrickWildcat

    I couldn’t tell you who was on which bill.

  • arglebargle

    obozo!s – for the wingnut win!

  • Belasaurius

    I found this ass on a Trump page

    • The Wanderer

      Yeesh, wotta dingbat.

    • Dr.Zoidberg

      Wow, that much stupidity literally gave me cancer. Off to the hospital now!

      • arglebargle

        thanks obozo!care

    • borninatrailer

      Rolling that concept/ball of hate that is “THE LAW IS THE LAW” around in my mind, when it is in reference to escaped slaves as criminals, is causing some kind of physical reaction.

      Can you get hives on your dura mater?

    • NorthStarSpanx

      Jesus Heath Christ, what a moron.

    • Justno

      Fuck. I was trying not to crack open the vodka this early but now I must.

      • BearGHAZI

        Bro, even wingnuttery is not an excuse for cracking open the vodka before noon. I’m afraid you’ll just have to own that

        • Justno

          Crap. I want my denial back.

    • Lefty Frizzell

      Anyone who breaks a law is equivalent – all people, all laws, all times.

      The logic is infallible, and I bet this genius is rightly pleased with himself! And the upfist – his genius is being recognized in his lifetime, ergo he’s more geniusy than Van Gogh!

    • SpideySenser

      I am pretty sure the Brits/Tories considered Washington a fugitive and a criminal.

      • Querolous

        The Romans and that middle eastern guy.

        • SpideySenser

          Yes, that Jewish DFH! Also, too.

    • Before this election cycle, I’d have naturally assumed that was a Poe, but now…

    • Blank Ron

      ‘Yes, Glorbnarz, humans really do think this way. That is why the quarantine of Earth is to be continued indefinitely.’

    • nightmoth

      Up against the wall, redneck mother.

    • BearGHAZI

      No one is that stupid

    • Jay Vaughn

      Did you really need to specify it’s a Trumpette?

    • aureolaborealis

      Let me give it a try:
      “It’s so obvious. She was the property a benevolent white man, and she stole herself away from him, depriving him of his property. She’s clearly the asshole here. Can we really be surprised that these people to have no respect for the rule of law, when this is their heritage?”
      Would it be trolling if I just posted stuff that they already agree with?

    • Querolous

      Snowden is still alive so is not eligible. If we are lucky in another 3 or 4 generations this might be a mainstream idea.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    “Too bad they couldn’t find a Black that was famous for something besides racial issues”. Those Ben Carson $20 bills will be worth double their face value in a couple of years.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Not to agree with a dumb ass, but I have always thought Louis Armstrong would be a great choice for one of our bills, as a cultural icon with international recognition.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        I’d go for Miles Davis…that’d make some wingnut heads assplode.

        • Notreelyhelping

          So what?

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            You feeling kinda blue today?

          • Whale Chowder

            I dunno, he was kind of a Freeloader.

        • Biff52

          That could work! When I saw him live, he never faced the audience. They could show the back of his head!

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            That would be awesome! Or maybe that famous scowl on the front, and the back of his head on the flip side.

      • Walter Wellstone

        Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Still alive. Also the Pluto fans would riot.

        • theblackdog

          No, that would make his fanboys even more insufferable.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Of course, the deeper truth is that EVERY famous person of color-whether overtly or not-is wrapped up in “racial Issues”. Satch was, Jesse Owens was, Denzel Washington…I’m sure Hank Aaron wishes to fuck he could’ve broken Babe Ruth’s record without the horrible racial invective that he was forced to endure.

    • IdRatherBeDancing

      Christy Love or GTFO

  • SpideySenser

    “i will not accept a twenty dollar bill until it has jackson back on it.” Please feel free to send your rejected 20s to me.

    • MrBlobfish

      Please mail in with a Harvey Milk stamp.

      • fredoandme

        i think i busted my upvoter button. hit it so hard that you shirley must have felt it.

        • MrBlobfish

          I felt a stirring in my loins.

          • fredoandme

            yup. that was me.

          • Whale Chowder

            Does a blobfish have loins?

          • OddMan

            More importantly, what about Shirley? Does she ever get any respect?

          • SpideySenser

            And don’t call her Shirley.

          • MarkM

            Yes. They are gelatinous and somewhat amorphous, but they are there.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      So slow he doesn’t realize Jackson will still be on the back, or “South” side of the Tubman.

      • SpideySenser

        It’s quite disappointing that she has to share her space with a racist dickhead, but at least she doesn’t have to look at him.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          I was thinking she would like him being in position to kiss her butt.

    • I hope I don’t get stuck behind one of these people at the ATM as they withdraw money, then redeposit the new bills, then withdraw some more, until they have nothing but Jackson twenties (or the ATM says their account is empty).

    • chimichanga

      You can’t tell me that they will opt not to use the ATM when the meth craving comes.

  • Msgr_Moment

    Where McPherson and the biographers he reviews sought only to sort out the knowable facts of Tubman’s life from the myths that have grown up around her,

    Screw it. Let’s go for a hero whose life we do know all about: Jeebus on the $20.
    Wait, what?

  • anwisok

    Thank you for my first ragestroke of the day, Dok.

    HOW . . . but . . .AAAARRRggggHHHH . . That’s . . . that’s . . .what . . . *table flip* *storms out, muttering curses*

  • arglebargle

    Dead Harriet Tubman > Dead Scalia x Dead Breitbart

  • JBenningfield

    Do they make Round-Up for assholes? Need a 40 gallon drum or two of the stuff.

  • John Smith

    Tubman sometimes “experienced dreams or visions, even hallucinations, sometimes with powerful religious overtones—more than once she said that God had spoken to her.”

    Every Christian everywhere libelz!!! 111!

    • cairocat

      Are we sure she never thought S/He told her to be a Republican candidate for President?

    • Skadi

      When white Christians hear God speaking to them, it’s a sign of their faith. When black Christians hear God speaking to them, it’s evidence that they’re delusional. Because it’s well known that God only speaks to the privileged.

  • therblig

    when is obama going to open the goddamn fema camps and remove these morons from functioning society? wasn’t that a campaign promise?

  • DoILookAmused2u ?

    Too early in the morning for this racist stuff.

    • fredoandme

      like rust, it never rests.

  • borninatrailer

    This shit just makes me crack up but only because it makes me back to Obama’s election and talk of “post-racial America.”

    L to the O to the L

  • rabid_baboon

    I can’t even wrap my head around how this is controversial to anyone. Well, actually I can, but it hurts my brain and my dogs don’t like it when I start yelling at my laptop.

  • SK

    Next you’ll be telling us that George Washington was capable of telling a lie

    Not me. I’ll be telling you that freeing his slaves upon his death makes him just as much of a slave owner as Tommy J.

  • Look Closer

    Poor Republicans. They just can’t help themselves can they???

    • Blank Ron

      Nope.
      – Ivan Pavlov

  • DerrickWildcat

    I heard that this new bill will be slightly larger than the other bills.

    • fredoandme

      okay. i laught!

  • Vecciojohn LLC

    Yeah, when I need cash, if the atm dispenses bills with Tubman on them, I’ll go inside the building and demand that they change all the machines to dispense 10s and 5s and 50s. By God, I won’t have it! I’m a taxpayer! What about our white heritage?!

  • baconzgood

    “this will go the way of the sacagawea golden dollar. i will not accept a twenty dollar bill until it has jackson back on it. give me 10’s and 50’s…i’ll deal with it…”

    Obviously this guy never worked a register. 10s and 50s are rarely in the drawer. When Baconz was a teen at a convenient storage (which really wasn’t convenient) we would go a whole shift with out having a 10 or 50 in the drawer. Best to get 5s. Registers lurv 5s.

    • fredoandme

      the 10’s are the first to go in the beginning bank, in change for all of the 20’s and 100’s. at least in a bar. never got a 50 bill in any beginning bank, rarely saw one tendered.

    • theblackdog

      Yup, whenever I started a restaurant shift the 10s were gone after the first hour.

  • unrelatedwaffle

    Can’t wait for wingnuts to start screaming at ATMs in public for giving them Tubmans. *glee* Maybe they will throw those “worthless” bills away, right into my pocket.

    Wait, I get it, it’s all a Socialist Plot to redistribute wealth!!!1

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …Ben Carson thinks that Harriet Tubman should be on the $2 bill? I guess the GOP is even more racist than I thought!!! I always thought they only considered 3/5ths of a human being not 1/10th!!!

  • Vincent Ricola

    I hope the ghost of Harriet Tubman is keeping a detailed list of who to haunt. She deserves better than attention from these worthless fuckstains. Grrrrr.

    • Blank Ron

      It’s quite possible that her ghost is having a hearty laugh at the gibbering and spittle-drenching.

  • Sakonyachen

    Hmmmm? People threatened to bail and go back to the plantation with full knowledge of routes and methods and Tubman threatened to shoot them? I’m shocked! If I was doing Tubman’s work, I would have shot them for saying it, the threat wouldn’t have been on Wikipedia. Of course, due to the way my mother raised me, I would not have used any racial slurs, so there wouldn’t be that for the racists to hide behind either.

    • theblackdog

      Remember at that point in history it was not a racial slur to use that word anyway, so I wouldn’t be surprised if she actually did. Even so, I’ve seen a number of books reference her having to make the “Move or Die” threat to one who wanted to go back, so I’m inclined to believe that the story likely occurred.

      • nightmoth

        She was a fucking GENERAL with her troops, and she did whatever it took.

      • Sakonyachen

        Oh I have no doubt it happened. Hell, I guarantee it happened. My sarcasm was about the disingenuous racist bullshit where the person was acting as if her doing so was out of line. She did what made the most sense to keep her operation viable. I might have done worse. But I was born poor, not in captivity, so maybe I’m underestimating the compassion she was trying to show by giving them a choice.

        Also, I never thought about that not being a slur back then.

        • theblackdog

          Ah, my sarcasm detector must be off today, but yeah it definitely was bullshit of anyone who thinks she was out of line. I remember the first book I read that mentioned this incident said that slaves who were captured or went back were beaten until they told their owners (or the capturers) who was in their party, what routes they took, and who helped them along the way. For any slave to go back meant compromising Harriet and the Underground Railroad so I can’t help but think she knew what was at stake and while she gave them a choice, she was prepared to make the hard decision and live with it.

  • Walter Wellstone

    This is good, actually. Racists in America need to fight for being racist. When they started misbehaving after Emancipation and continued to do so when the Civil Rights Act became the law of the land the gloves should have come off harder on them; yes they should have and that one’s on us. We splattered Loving v. VA on their faces but that wasn’t enough. We shoved a Black President vinegar-ammonia-and-jalapeño enema up their rectums (twice) but we shouldn’t stop there. Having Harriet Tubman on money–the thing they love the most–is a good move. We need to remind them that being a racist ain’t gonna be fun in this country and that we won’t let up, we won’t give them a break, we will continue to make their miserable, pathetic little lives uncomfortable (with votes and legislation) and that we will continue to give them shit for as long as they continue to be the little racist pieces of shit that they are. Fuck them.

    • lroom

      Damn good rant.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        Next we go after the labels on cheap beer, shotgun shell boxes and pork rind bags.

    • dshwa

      And then we’ll get to do it all over again with the LGBTs, because bigots never seem to learn.

      • Walter Wellstone

        Abso-fucking-lutely.

    • OddMan

      Damn, this post has reminded me yet again why I love this site. Smart writers, smart readers. (and absolutely the best comments, that we don’t allow)
      I truly think this is one of the best political/news forums in all media.
      Thank you all.

    • Jennaratrix

      You have single-handedly redeemed this entire issue for me; instead of being sad and angry at the hate that still prevails (which is where I was after reading the article), I’m reminded that all that spew is just that demographic’s dying breath. Now if only they would stop taking their damn time about it…

      • Iron Monkey

        Because they get good health care (or at least can pay for it) because of Medicare it take these old fucks who are vessels full of racial hate, forever to join the choir invisible.

    • malsperanza

      Can I get a Hell Yeah!?

  • Shibusa

    Penny for your thoughts, wingnuts?

    • Blank Ron

      That would be WAY over market.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Remember: all the cr@p being spewed was once accepted (or semi-accepted) in mainstream society. These pathetic characters are still living in their delusional 1950’s-like world (the real 1950’s were different, but how to explain that …). The so-called “conservatives” cannot and do not want to face this.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Hence, their jihad against “political correctness”. There’s only one motivation for it…they want to be able to use the N-word without social stigma.

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        I agree. They cannot fathom how their N-word jokes are looked upon with distaste. And then they try to substitute Jews or Hispanics and still the distaste.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          And, of course, they’re not really jokes…

    • Villago Delenda Est

      ‘I did not mean that Conservatives are generally stupid; I meant, that stupid persons are generally Conservative.” — John Stuart Mill

  • TheBidenator

    Banning racism at the Gateway Pundit is like banning dick jokes on Wonkette….it’s part of their culture.

  • rosenbomb

    I take comfort in the fact that we are smarter than them.

    • Tony Alexander

      prettier, and smell better, too!

      i’m just sayin’

      • Walter Wellstone

        I wouldn’t bet on the “smell better” part.

        • Cindyinencinitas

          Speak for yourself, Walter. I happen to smell like sea spray and joie de vivre.

    • Frank Underboob

      When you think about it, that’s not all that big a complement – I could say the same thing about my cats.

    • Blank Ron

      So do we.
      – a pile of bricks in my back yard

    • BearGHAZI

      In addition, our grammatical and oratorical skills are superlative. We can spell ‘transsexual,’ even.

  • MrBlobfish

    I hear obozo is going to give all blacks free H. Tubman bills as reparations.

    On second thought, some nut has probably already imagined this.

    • Belasaurius

      they have

  • goonemeritus

    In the long arc of history an undeniable transition toward social justice is easy to see. As comforting as this is it doesn’t immunize decent people from exposure to the comments on right wing blogs.

    • lroom

      Never read the comments!

  • TheBidenator

    Silly wingnut racists- if you’re reading the Daily Stormer or VDare or SMOTI’s site you’re already average to below average intelligence…I wouldn’t be insulting other people.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I’m curious what right wing douchebag/conspiracy theorist Curt Schilling will have to say about this on ESPN. Oh…wait…he got fired yesterday…

    • AntiDerpomeme

      God, I hate that racist fuck. And I’m a Red Sox fan.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        And aside from his odious beliefs, a clueless moron. I mean, dude lost 50 million in some video game scheme, gets a good gig with ESPN, and yet-despite numerous warnings- can’t keep from posting his virulent opinions on social media. Prepare yourself for the usual mouthbreather misunderstanding of the 1st Amendment…

        • theblackdog

          I’ve been saying the Liberty Counsel is already crawling up his ass and whispering dollar amounts in his ear on how much he should sue ESPN for “violating his free speech”

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            And here we thought wingers hated “frivolous lawsuits”.

          • theblackdog

            Only when it’s for an issue that has nothing to do with their wingnut hearts.

  • Biff52

    As Holly Walker pointed out, we won’t be using paper currency by then, anyway.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d3YePlBVMqo

  • Lefty Frizzell

    It seems pretty fucking simple to see who the real racists here are – I can’t wrap my head around why there’s always so much debate about that.

    • Blank Ron

      It’s not really debate. It’s one side screaming and raving while the other side just wished they’d STFU.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Jim Hoft needs to pay Wonkette the money he owes you in crisp new Tubmans.

    • TheBidenator

      It would take until 2020 for that loser deadbeat to #paythefuckup

  • Tony Alexander

    these are the days i wanna grab my cpu and sling it across the room!

  • Flashman

    This is all irrelevant, since we will be using iPay or Google Wallet on our Harriet Tubman ™ brand Obamaphones.

    • Walter Wellstone

      Are we going to be able to use our Tubmans on the FEMA internment camps? That’s what I want to know.

      • Squirrel_t_robot

        FEMA script only, and No Touching!

        • Walter Wellstone

          No touching!

  • Ergoetal

    I heard she had an affair with JFK.

    • SnarkOff

      I hear she killed Vince Foster.

      • Walter Wellstone

        And she 69ed Paula Jones.

    • theblackdog

      Even worse, it was a threeway with JFK and Marylin Monroe

    • Villago Delenda Est

      AND was at the grassy knoll!

      • Ergoetal

        …with her clothes off.

  • Squirrel_t_robot

    Hey, it’s a good step forward for those suffering from epilepsy, as well.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    I”m always torn about Old Hickory. He did save New Orleans from the British, even though the war was over. If he hadn’t the people of South Louisiana would be speaking English.
    I’m also part Cherokee, so the whole Trail of Tears. Yet he started the Democratic Party, sadly the one that kept Slavery alive. He also put down the Nulification Crisis in South Carolina, proving how insane South Carolinians were some 30 years prior to the Historic Unpleasantries Between the States.
    He was a Slave Trader, Murderer, and two term President. American History is messy, and produces few saints.

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Pres. Jackson also destroyed his era’s version of the Fed, tossing the nation into a 7 year recession.

    • NoGoodnik

      Interestingly, in 1832, the Marshall Court agreed that the Cherokee Nation was a sovereign nation and as such the federal treaties trumped Georgia state law. That was when Jackson invited Marshall to come down and enforce the decision. But, in the nullification crisis in the same year, Marshall was able to persuade him to uphold federal law.

  • Walter Wellstone

    So, if we have Tubmans now, what do I do with all the Ameros I’ve been burying in a jar in my backyard?

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      I think they can still be converted to bitcoins. Check the exchange rate.

    • Logic of Color
    • Whale Chowder

      Let them ferment and turn into Kashchi?

    • Cindyinencinitas

      I had a neighbor once who sold weed and he buried $50K in his yard and when he had a margin call after a couple of years he dug it up and it was decomposing. Put some of those little bead thingies that come in packets with the money.

  • Tio_Doidinho

    What everybody else said. Let them rant and fling poo. Marginalization is a good thing.

    • nightmoth

      Yeah, but cleaning off their poo is a bother. Put them in cages as an endangered species and hose down the cement whenever they fling.

  • SnarkOff

    The fact that these people even exist is enough to make me want to hang myself from a doorknob.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      You must have some tall doors in your house.

    • Erik Lonnrot

      You need to turn that energy outward, I’m sure racist fucks have door knobs too.

      • nightmoth

        Ditto. I’ve heard that depression is often repressed anger. Mad turned inwards becomes sad. Better to kick ass!

  • TheBidenator

    I hear Harriet Tubman was black therefore she is disqualified.

    – Wingnuts

    • Cindyinencinitas

      And she wasn’t even hot.

      • Jennaratrix

        This is the undercurrent to so much of it; put Beyonce on the $20 and they’d still be racist mad, but they’d temper it with, “But at least she’s hot.”

  • SnarkOff

    TUBMANGHAZI!!!!!!

  • AntiDerpomeme

    Sheesh, some people lose their shit over the stupidest things. I’d almost feel bad for them, considering that there must be no peace in their sad, meaningless, pants-shitting lives, except they are vile racists.

    • dshwa

      They get one life, and that’s what they choose to spend their energy during it on. Sad.

      • NoGoodnik

        Not only one life, but the most sophisticated instrument ever to evolve or be made by human kind in the known universe, and this is what they use it for. A miracle rests between their ears and this is what they use it for.

  • cairocat

    “[T]oo bad they couldn’t find a Black that was famous for something besides the racial issues.”
    Any suggestions?
    Really…..

    • SnarkOff

      How about a nice football player or Motown artist?

      • therblig

        peace and love

    • Walter Wellstone

      Maya Angelou, Ralph Ellison, Josephine Baker, Nina Simone, Billie Holiday… want me to keep going?

      • nightmoth

        All of whom wrote or sang about racial issues. But you understand that—the people who are complaining about Tubman refuse to admit the underlying racism that has affected every person in this country.

    • eddi

      Toussaint L’Ouverture? Kicked Napoleon’s boney ass.
      http://www.historywiz.com/toussaint.htm

    • Enfant Terrible

      Chevalier de Saint-Georges – classical composer, conductor, virtuoso violinist.

    • Cindyinencinitas

      Bootsy Collins? He’s just a buncha fun.

      • notfromvenus

        Only if they put the Mothership on the back.

    • PUAAN

      Rochester.
      Prissy.
      Aunt Jemima.

    • dansezlajavanaise

      bill cosby?
      uncle ben?
      uncle tom?

  • chascates

    Instead of looking at one person on a $20 bill how about looking at the actual statistics of:
    Percentage of blacks incarcerated versus percentage of whites
    Percentage of black unemployment versus percentage of whites
    Percentage of black median income versus percentage of whites
    and on and on and on.
    Instead of complaining about the overdue recognition of American heroes how about just examining the tremendous divide cause by white racism? How about examining these figures and thinking about what equality and freedom really amount to in this ‘shining city on a hill’?

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Now, now!

      That would require Americans to deal with their toxic legacy of race!

      Ain’t no one got time for that, apparently.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        The hell you say. – Leonard Pelletier

    • Whale Chowder

      These words…”examining,” “looking,” “thinking”… I don’t think you know quite whom you’re dealing with.

  • Squirrel_t_robot

    I’m not a fan of taking historical figures out of their era and foisting modern day judgements upon them.

    However: Andrew Jackson was a horrible human being, even in the temper of his own times.

    And he hasn’t gotten any better since, either.

    • cmd

      Wonder how many of these wingnuts could have told you anything at all about Andrew Jackson before he became their cause and hero thanks to FOX and those types.

      • the_steamer

        I suspect he’s some kind of hero to most of them. Think how many have “ancestral homes” in land that was vacated by the trail of tears.

        • Skadi

          All I ask in this creation
          Is a pretty little wife…and a BIG plantation
          Way up yonder in the Cherokee Nation ♫ ♬

          • Cindyinencinitas

            I gotta say, if it wasn’t for Jackson, I’d live in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, so, wow.

    • NoGoodnik

      He was horrible even in his own time. When the Marshall court famously ruled against him concerning the removal of the Cherokee from their land guaranteed by federal treaty, he remarked “John Marshall has made his decision, now let him enforce it.” He was considered an ass even then.

      • yyyaz

        Only by the pointy heads. Ol’ Dickory had a bigger base than O’Liely, Limburger, Inannity and all the hate webs combined. By percentage of the population, of course.

        • NoGoodnik

          Fair point.

  • Sardonicuss

    Oh General Sherman. Why did you stop?!

    • Blank Ron

      Ran out of matches?

      • eddi

        Ran out of war. He was warming his hands on South Carolina (?) when Lee surrendered.

    • Jennifer R

      Enjoyably enough, most of the looting and burning was done by Confederate troops desperate for supplies and unwilling to leave anything for the Union.

  • nightmoth

    Well, Dok, I almost didn’t read this, since I knew you’d be culling the vile comments from swamps I don’t visit, but I couldn’t resist and now I’m sad and mad and feeling my years. When I was a starry-eyed teenager, I really thought we’d over this shit by now. Kinda OT, but my problem with Bernie is that when he promises me a “revolution” he doesn’t mean the revolution I want, which definitely involves lining these mfs up against a wall and firing at will. I’ll add “with votes” because I don’t want a banhammering. Sorry, I know violence begets violence, love your enemies, etc., BUT—so tired of this.

    • Me not sure

      Ravish them, ravish the fuck out of them.

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Some people simply won’t acknowledge how slavery shaped this nation, and the people who risked their lives to shape it into a nicer place.

      You know, like Tubman.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Would lining them up against the wall for a vigorous mass nut-kicking satisfy you….for now?

      • Whale Chowder

        I don’t know, but I’m willing to give it the ol’ college try!

        • Cindyinencinitas

          How about lining them up and giving them all horrendous, over-processed perms?

          • yyyaz

            Weave them some really cool dreads or cornrows and set them with superglue. Fabulous!

          • Cindyinencinitas

            Corn rows, for sure. With beads on the ends so they can’t sleep at night because the beads will hurt. And make them sit in the sun so their scalps burn and no amount of Port Royal beer will help.

    • Walter Wellstone

      I hear ya.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Yup, I know where you’re coming from, fer sure.

    • malsperanza

      This is why symbols actually make a difference, and are not empty gestures. We saw the same howling when MLK’s birthday was made a national holiday. Then they got used to it, and now they like to claim him. It never dawned on them that the images on greenbacks don’t altogether represent best and brightest. But then, half of them assume that those faces on the bills and coins were all presidents.

      All the yelling about Confederate statues is from people who have never glanced at those statues, and would be hard put to identify the figures they portray from an unlabeled photo. Each time a change comes, they try to hold the line. The changes are coming thick and fast, as they did in the 1960s, and they are scrambling to keep track of all the battles they are losing. It must be exhausting.

      Meanwhile we are raising a generation of children who will not remember a time when it was impossible to imagine a black person or a woman being president. Put a couple of black people and women on the moniez, and the opinions of half-dead fart-ridden nitwits will matter less and less.

      • nightmoth

        Thx—I needed that.

  • Leave it to wingnuts to assume that it’s FAMOUS people that are put on money, not, y’know, important historical figures. Also, too, they want a black person who was “famous” for non racial issues (because racial issues probably shouldn’t be important to black folk, particularly during Harriet Tubman’s lifetime, amirite?) so I assume they they pretty much mean “that dude who invented the peanut”

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Or Herman Cain.

      • Marion in Savannah

        He’d be on the $999 bill.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          The official currency of Uzbekibekibekistan?

          • eddi

            More Glenbeckistan.

      • Jennifer R

        I was thinking about him recently. Wonder what he has been up to.

        • eddi

          Ask him about his endorsement of Trump when he wakes up.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Oh, the usual, I imagine….selling shitty cardboard “pizza” and sexually harassing female employees.

          • cessnadriver

            That crap is barf on a board.

    • Blank Ron
    • cmd

      Is that the guy my brother is always quoting when saying black people bootstraps blah blah?

    • yyyaz

      James Earl Carter III?

    • Angela Ruzzo

      She was “famous for non racial issues” because she was a woman who also agitated for Women’s Rights. So of course wingnuts fuss about this, because women are not equal human beings to them.

  • theblackdog

    This is my favorite non-wingnut parody picture of the new Tubman Bill

    • Blank Ron

      … my gods, I think it works. I suddenly lost all desire to go to the grocery store.

    • nightmoth

      Now, that IS funny—reminds me of my grandma.

    • Candy Apple

      Or “this much money could have helped a black family to freedom — and you’re going to spend it on a mocha cinnamon frothalatte??”

    • Hardly Ideal

      The only way they can improve it is to somehow make her shake her head when you move the bill.

      • YoBunnyBunny

        Holograms!!!!!

      • theblackdog

        OMG YES. If we ever move to more plastic in our $20 bill we need to make this happen!

    • Angela Ruzzo

      How strange. I never look at who is pictured on my money. I didn’t even realize that Andrew Jackson was on the $10 bill. I never look at my $10 bills, I just hand them over.

  • MOG253

    Wow, just wow.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    Andrew “Trail Of Tears” Jackson? How about a white person who was famous for non-racial issues? That would be a start, at least.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      It would be hard to find a historical male person in American history who didn’t have racial issues. Even Lincoln had negative racial beliefs. Personally, I think they should put FDR on one of our bills. He was astonishingly tolerant, considering his rich WASP background. Or maybe we should put Eleanor Roosevelt on one of our bills, as she stood up for human equality even more than her husband did.

  • Callyson

    He doesn’t need to say anything racist, because his readers will take care of that themselves. A whole lot of them wanted to talk about what an ugly old black lady Harriet Tubman was

    Oh, for fuck’s sake.

    PS: #paythefuckupdeadbeat

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Some asked why she wasn’t smiling.

      • Callyson

        “Because assholes like you RWNJ commenters exist?”

        • Squirrel_t_robot

          Pretty much my response.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          DING DING DING DING DING

        • yyyaz

          Existed back then before comments weren’t allowed and there were no niceties. It wasn’t votes they were using to “upfist” her.

      • cessnadriver

        Photographic exposure times were very long back then and people were told not to smile in photos because it caused movement which tended to blur the image.

        People back then were not dour and depressed, they just looked that way in pictures.

        Facts have a liberal bias.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Very true. I have a photo of my father taken in 1922 when he was 4 years old. He looks very unhappy. He told me that he had to stand still for half a minute, which is hard for a 4-year-old to do, and his shoes, borrowed from a cousin, did not fit and pinched his feet and he was very unhappy. You never know what was going on in olden times when people were having their picture taken. His 2-yr-old sister is also in the picture, and I wonder how on earth they got a 2-yr-old to sit still for 30 seconds, because her image is not blurry.

          • Querolous

            Probably something with cocaine or morphine as the active ingredient.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            There used to be something called “gripe water” that contained alcohol and was often given to babies when they got fussy.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Show me the Tubmans!

      • Walter Wellstone

        Where are the Tubmans, Lebowski?!

        • Cindyinencinitas

          This is very complicated. Lotta ins, lotta outs, lotta what-have-yous.

  • Callyson

    James Fulford at racist clearinghouse VDare

    I read that as “VD are” and wondered what STD it referred to. After reading what that asshole had to say, I’m sticking to my interpretation FFS.

    • Whale Chowder

      “Various forms of VD Are contributing to the quality of the comments at such sites as VDare, Redstate and Gateway Pundit.”

  • Squirrel_t_robot

    Right wingers are remarkably obsessed with ‘welfare’ for individuals, but corporate welfare?

    That’s no thang.

    • NoGoodnik

      Corporate welfare is less obvious, which means it takes thought and reasoning. Thinking is hard.

      • yyyaz

        And the corporate “personhoods” pay big, sweet munniez to keep their thievery on the down low.

        • NoGoodnik

          But, corporate persons are not punished like individual persons are. Corporate persons can murder and not be executed.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      They’re also totally cool with agricultural subsidies as long as they’re getting them.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Right wingers are obsessed with welfare because they can’t stand to see other people getting something for free that they don’t qualify for.

  • SayItWithWookies

    You know the Republican Party is the real present-day affiliation of civil rights activists when they don’t know whether to call Harriet Tubman their own hero or to call her an unstable, violent, overhyped n******. Personally, if I had been a slave and was rescued and led to freedom by a swearing, epileptic gun-toting crazy woman, I’d love her for the rest of my life. And if the secessionists have a problem with that, then it’s evident why.

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Who are you going to trust to lead you to freedom? Some cracker wasn’t stepping up to do so. Sure seems that a tiny woman who managed to escape her own self then came back for others is the one to trust.

      After the Fugitive Slave Act, it became even riskier to help slaves escape; that’s when Tubman was doing most of her work.

      • nightmoth

        She risked torture and death to do it.

        • cessnadriver

          To a rebublican, having your lunch served to you 15 minutes late in jail is torture! Torture! Torture!!!!!!!

        • Angela Ruzzo

          I don’t think of Harriet as a “woman” or a “black.” She was simply an exceptional human being. In other times and other places, she would have done the same thing to free other people. We need more people like her.

    • Hardly Ideal

      Even if she wasn’t a white knight with a prismatic sword and hair like liquid gold, she got the job done. You don’t always get what you want, but sometimes you get what you need.

  • MarkM

    “One reason for the Tubman boom: the trend of promoting antiquarian hate against whites for hundred-year-old racism and for slavery abolished a hundred and fifty years ago.”
    Anyone who can refer to ‘hundred-year-old racism” in the face of all of the overwhelming evidence that it is still a very real and prevalent attitude – a tiny fraction of which is presented in the above article – is either abjectly stupid or wilfully blind. Probably both.

    • nightmoth

      Both. As well as self-righteous and defensive.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        And just stone stupid.

    • Cindyinencinitas

      Any sensible racist wants nice, fresh racism. Pffft.

    • yyyaz

      Now we know what river all the melting glaciers are replenishing.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Very true. We should not forget that Harriet was a remarkable human being, regardless of race. She risked her life and her freedom to save strangers. She was not an educated, wealthy woman, but she did not let that stop her. How many people today can say the same? She reminds me of Aspasia, a famous woman who lived in Ancient Greece, who fought for the education and empowerment of women at a time when women were considered to be less than human, and who suffered public infamy, arrest, and prison for her beliefs. If Harriet had lived in different times, she would have fought to free different people, because she was that kind of person. We need more people like Harriet and Aspasia.

  • Bill Slider

    Why do I think that the photo on most $20 bills will have a mustache?

  • orygoon

    Mr. Goon had a stroke last weekend. No cause found. He’s doing well, thanking you in advance. Home yesterday and life is almost normal.

    Gotta skate on the edge here and say that I wish this vile racist outrage actually did cause strokes in Wingnutland.

    • Marion in Savannah

      How awful for you both. Glad he’s doing well.

    • Courser

      Oh no, I’m so sorry! Glad that he’s home and recovering now. Best wishes for a full, quick recovery.

    • Whale Chowder

      Glad he’s doing well, best to you both.

    • yyyaz

      Hang in there Mrs., chances are good that the Mr. will fully recover and be able to avoid another one.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I’m so sorry to hear this. Treatment of strokes has progressed so much since my mother had one in 1973, that I hope Mr. Goon will fully recover. Being the caregiver for a stroke patient is not easy, and I hope you find support for what you are going through. I highly recommend finding a good local support group.

    • orygoon

      He’s good! He’s always lucky with shit like this! Don’t worry about him or about me, except for the part about putting up with his regular damn self, which I am pretty used to after all of these years.

    • jmk

      Oh I’m sorry you’re both going through that – Repub Brother’s wife, who is younger than I am, had one last July, and it’s terrifying when it happens. She’s mostly fine now, although a few issues remain, but she’s a tough chick – 9 weeks after it happened, she danced at her oldest son’s wedding, to the resounding sobs of all of our family.
      I’m so glad he’s doing well… and that you get to put up with his regular damn self ;)

  • Bill Slider

    The Administrator should announce that Tubman was chosen based on her string support for the Second Amendment.

  • orygoon

    The Bundy Clan is happy to be in jail, where they won’t have to mess with this assault to their delicate sensibilities.

    • yyyaz

      I’ll bet all the cheers they heard when the news hit the cell blocks harshed their serenity. Poor dears.

    • Querolous

      Noww that KKKlayman dude who was barred from inserting himself into the Bundy case is suing the GOP. Ain’t it nice to sit back and watch ’em devour themselves?

  • Jared Moss

    I got a taste of the wingnuttery yesterday afternoon when I commented on ThinkProgress about this topic. The usual RWNJ stuff about how Tubman was a REPUBLICAN fighting for freedoms from the EEEEEVIIIILLLL DEMOCRATS. I gently reminded them that the parties switched policies in the 60’s (couldn’t help myself), and drew a slew of replies that essentially boiled down to “Democrats keep blahs in slavery to GUBMINT WELFARE, so YOU DESTROYED THE FAMILY STRUCTURE”.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Stupid does as stupid does.

    • cessnadriver

      I refer them to the seminal event: Hubert Humphrey’s speech to the 1948 Democratic Convention.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Slavery destroyed the family structure. It was a deliberate white policy for hundreds of years. Now we blame the government or African Americans for what was official policy 200 years ago.

  • Iam Reading

    Neo Confederates need to be voted in the face

    • Candy Apple

      And in the nuts!

      • mardam422

        With roundy, clubby ones (votes).

    • Villago Delenda Est

      With votes. Sharpy, pointy votes.

      • Playonwords

        Those paper cuts can be nasty

  • tehbaddr

    Joy! Haven’t had a Children’s Treasury of Wingnut Response post in a while. Thanks Dok!

  • rocktonsam

    ha ha blacks don’t even have 20’S!!!
    except JayZ.
    -fox biddnezz channel … probably

  • Candy Apple

    I like how they think Democrats don’t own a firearm. I own one, sugar, and I’d be more than happy to introduce you to it.

    As for the rest of it, UGH. Fuck these guys.

    • h4rr4r

      Only one?
      Come on now, they are like pringles. You can’t have just one.

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        I have just one. That is all I need ;)

  • Cindyinencinitas

    You just have to keep refreshing the narrative to overcome the age-old fact that the dominant culture writes history. That’s why we don’t really know who ate all the grain that was in the pyramids.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      And the dominant culture has been male for millennia. Nobody talks about all the women who had to grind that grain in the Pyramids and turn it into bread.

      • Cindyinencinitas

        Or make the damn sammiches!!!

    • Be Gin

      Fat Mice?

  • janecita

    If these racist wingnuts don’t want their $20.00 bills, they should just give them to me. I’m not a racist and I like money:-)

  • Playonwords

    For the Stormer crowd.

    What do you call a genitally deformed, drug addicted, sexually perverted, hypochondriac bigot?

    Mein Fuhrer!

    • Tio_Doidinho

      Donald Trump?

    • Be Gin

      Actually it sounds a lot like the biker who rents the garage down the alley.

      Not judging! OK?

  • Ambignostic

    Thanks to this guy, I’m now going to look sideways at white people carrying huge stacks of ones.
    https://twitter.com/fender_splendor/status/722879145890295811

  • mardam422

    Most of those morans prolly looked at the picture of the white guy named Jackson on the $20 and said, “Yeah, I loved Thriller!”

  • Chick_Tract_Fil_A

    Cash is like cable TV to me. People still use it?

  • IslamIsNotPeaceful

    And modern homosexuals think that their “struggles” to convince society that it’s normal to want to shove one’s c*ck into another man’s assh*le is equivalent to the plight of women like Tubman.

    • Enfant Terrible

      Your handle unpacks as:

      I slam is not peaceful.

      You looking for a power bottom or sumthin’?

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        When did apple come out with the I slam? And how much is it?

    • Juan de Fuca
    • ShriekinViolet

      A style note. You don’t have to asterisk-ize words like “cock” and “asshole” here. As in, you’re an asshole but not the kind that anyone wants to put their cock in.

      • Bassmaster

        HEYOOO!!!!

    • cessnadriver

      We are not talking about the propensity of republican men towards being closet cases here. Your fantasies about having anal sex with other men are a subject for another debate.

      • Bassmaster

        Heyyoooo!!!

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Of course it’s “normal.” Anything that people do in large enough numbers that doesn’t immediately hurt or kill other people is normal. You should study Ancient Greek History. Alexander the Great was gay, and nobody cared about this at the time, because it was part of “normal.” The Human experience is full of variety. Just as everyone doesn’t like the same food, or the same religion, or the same clothes, or the same language, not everyone has the same sexual orientation. There are countries in Africa where fat women are considered the most beautiful, but in the US we worship anorexic women. Variety is the spice of life.

    • Tio_Doidinho

      A closet case with VPN. Oh joy.

  • Banrion

    I’m the first to admit that I suck at history and there is a lot I don’t know the details of. So I read the Southern Strategy wiki page and all I can say is, the more things change, the more they stay the fucking same. You can practically find/replace every instance of the word race with LGBT, and be accurate.

    • IslamIsNotPeaceful

      Sorry, but wanting to shove your HIV infected c*ck into another man’s bleeding b*tthole is not equivalent to being black.

      • Banrion

        Oh don’t worry your pretty little head about that. My throbbing purple member is reserved only for you sweetheart.

        • h4rr4r

          That is one boring troll you are talking too. He just repeats the same stuff over and over.
          That guy is so far in the closet he is blowing that goatman in Narnia.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Why does everything have to be “equivalent”? Discrimination is discrimination. If we start labeling one kind as worse than another then we are playing into the right-wing authoritarian power politics game. Let me point out that black people were enslaved in the US for hundreds of years, but women were enslaved by men for 5000 years, and still are enslaved in many countries. Slavery is slavery. Discrimination is discrimination. Degrees of discrimination are irrelevant.

      • Hardly Ideal

        Hey, welcome back. Found your way out of that manhole I told you to fall down last time, I presume?

      • natoslug

        Oranges are not potatoes. And you might want to consider better life choices if your anus is still bleeding, little cub.

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        Just because you have a teeny weeny Peen, doesn’t mean you have to be jealous of the gigantic gay cock.

    • cleos_mom

      In many anti-gay speeches, the speaker could replace “homosexual” with “Jew” and historians would know the difference only other references in the speech.

  • Ionlylikecats

    Slightly off topic: being told by people I know that Jackson wasn’t horrible or good, be existed on a spectrum! Even after I pointed out he was a drunken psychopath who was bloodthirsty and was both a serial killer and a mass murderer as well as a bigot and was much worse than his time period would suggest as well as someone else telling me “extreme” leftism where you think white people shouldn’t wear kimonos is just as bad as extreme rightism where you are fascist think you have the right to take away others freedoms. And is also the same as open carry of automatic weapons and shooting someone based on their skin color and they think I’m not open minded

    • Angela Ruzzo

      Anyone who questions the authoritarian viewpoint is open minded. I define “open-minded” as a person who thinks for himself/herself and outside the WASP box. I think you qualify.

      • Ionlylikecats

        Thanks. C: I get the you’re not open minded because you broke out of your Christian fundie upbringing to become a staunch commie argument ridiculous, yet popular.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Americans do not understand what Communism is. They think it is the same as Socialism, and it definitely is not. Most people will not understand your comment. You should be more explicit.

          • Of course, Communism also exists on a spectrum. Cuba of today is not the same thing as North Korea.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            True. And America of 2016 is not the same thing as America of 1976.

      • natoslug

        I want to remain outside the box of wasps, please.

        • Angela Ruzzo

          Real wasps get bad press. At least, the buggy kind do. They eat spiders, which I approve of whole heartedly, as I hate spiders. Other than that, I’m with you 100%.

          • notfromvenus

            Wasps can also sting you a bunch of times, though, unlike bees which die after one sting. So I think wasps deserve some bad press.

    • Hardly Ideal

      This kind of “discussion” might be a good reason to unplug the Internet connection for a day or three.

    • SullivanSt

      By their logic, neither Hitler nor Stalin were horrible or good either, because they also existed on a spectrum.

      Yeah, some people just can’t be reasoned with.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    My god, they actually wrote “Talking Monkey Harriet Tubman”?????!!!!!! Are these people human beings??? Is that not a hate crime??? I try to find the positive in negative things, so I guess in this case I can say that at least they didn’t say “Talking Monkey With A Vagina Harriet Tubman.”

    • SullivanSt

      RawStory published a menagerie of tweeted responses last night, and my Poe’s Law detector exploded.

    • Hardly Ideal

      I hopped on over to Gateway Pundit to take a look; it’s a special occasion, so I figured I’d allow it this one time. I hear all the time about right-wing comments being an anger wank-fest, but I figure a fair share of that assessment is LIEbrul condescension.

      But we were right. Those guys are so bitter, they can’t even snark right.

      • SullivanSt

        And you only saw the ones that weren’t deleted for being too over-the-top.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Bitter is an understatement. They can’t tolerate the slightest deviation from their position. Reason and Logic are anathema to them. I think that says everything one needs to know.

    • natoslug

      I’d rather be a talking monkey than a commenter on SMOTI’s site. And not one of these pathetic tail-less monkeys — I want a long, beautiful prehensile tail that I can use to swing through the redwoods. And to choke the life out of some of these wingnuts with. Choke with votes, I mean.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        I’m with you 100%. I have been a cat person all my life, and my cats express a lot of emotion and opinions with their tails. I sometimes wish I had one, so I could swish it angrily whenever I hear someone say something I strongly disagree with. Would this count as exercise????

        • natoslug

          We only have two cats. The newest one, a castoff with three legs, likes to climb to the top of the couch, wrap his tail around your neck, and then proceed to bite the back of your head until you pet him. At which time, he chews on your fingers if you pet too slowly.

          If he isn’t on the couch biting your head, he is either running in front of you so that he can suddenly lie down in front of your feet and try to get you to step on him or he is at the foot of the stairs, staring up at the second floor cat, whose only recourse is to start meowing and hissing madly, then run off and spray the kids’ laundry hamper in a most unladylike fashion. She does not appreciate him staring at her like that, even if he stays on his level and leaves the second completely to her.

          I think what I am trying to say is that cats are evil incarnate.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            They do seem to be evil incarnate at times. But I sometimes get the sneaking suspicion that they are smarter than us, because they are not interested in bullshit or external appearances. They are only interested in food, defecating, sleeping, and loving me. I wish I could say the same thing about half the people I know.

            I have 2 cats as well. One is Autistic and keeps to herself most of the time. The other is lovable and stupid. They provide me with endless hours of free entertainment, and a great deal of affection, which is more than I can say about most people I know. I am fine with their being evil incarnate at times, because they don’t pretend to be something they are not.

          • Webster

            Cats are not evil incarnate — they simply recognize their important role as the Center of the Universe…

          • Tansy Geek

            And as Centers of the Universe, they are obligated to remind of this fact.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            I just wish they could keep their fur to themselves instead of scattering it all over my house.

          • Angela Ruzzo
        • SDGeoff

          If it’s good enough for the cats. ..

          • Angela Ruzzo

            That’s what I say every time I take a nap. ?

  • SullivanSt

    Well, thank you wingnuts for acknowledging that Democrats don’t have blind fealty to party labels, history and facts be damned, in anywhere near the same degree that you do.

  • chimichanga

    H. Tubman regularly (for safety) dressed and lived as a man. I dunno – seemed timely to mention that.

    • If only the story involved her having to seduce some comely maiden as part of this cover. Wait, hold on, I’ll go and write that fanfic.

      • I AM R U

        …please post link.

    • Bear OmNomNom

      Great. Now I can’t spend $20 in North Carolina… even if I wanted to.

  • Walter Wellstone

    OT: Prince is dead.

    • kaw143

      WAIT! WAT?

      Stop it with the dying, people! It’s bumming me out!

    • Smokahontas

      It’s the end times :-(

      • harryeagar

        Curiously, while Wonketeers are all bus’ up about Prince, they seem not to care about Chyna. What does tht say about Wonkette?

    • Cindyinencinitas

      They so far have only said someone at Prince’s house died.
      edit: it was him. Holy fuck.

    • SnarkOff

      Oh, god, my Facebook feed is going to be a fucking purple sentimental nightmare for the next two weeks.

      • thewitchqueen74

        Mine already is.

  • IslamIsNotPeaceful

    The Democrats are a political party that define “consummating a marriage” as “ramming one’s raging member into another guy’s b*tthole.”

  • IslamIsNotPeaceful

    Marriage between a man and a woman is about love, commitment, and family. “Marriage” between two men is about one deviant violently driving his HIV infected, scabby ramrod into another deviant’s hairy b*tthole.

    • GDleftyPart2

      You should see someone about those scabs.
      Can I have your watch when you are dead?

  • Northern Isaac

    Everything I know about Harriet Tubman I learned from

    Drunk History – Harriet Tubman Leads an Army of Bad Bitches:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpTf1GFjCd8

    • MonkeyCat

      Me too! For my money the single greatest episode of Drunk History. I found myself thinking that Octavia Spencer’s performance was the deciding factor.

    • Sakonyachen

      I have to watch that later. I’m a huge Key and Peele Fan, but their Harriet Tubman skit was a flat out let down.

    • MrPendent

      Me too! Unfortunately, I watch it drunk, so I never remember it in the morning.

    • Annie Towne

      I read that the new bill will have “Dope as hell” written under her name.

  • Tio_Doidinho

    The closeted OCD Troll obsessed with throbbing purple dick is operating on a VPN. He just fires up a new account under a different IP address, and dives back in. Don’t know if Disqus can do anything, unless they can block him by his email address.

    It sucks. Trolls with VPN are impossible to get rid of.

    • Juan de Fuca

      Do you really think this guy knows what a VPN is?

      • Tio_Doidinho

        A persistent troll knows how to get around being banned. And this dude is, if nothing else, persistent.

  • The idea of putting a woman on currency was to commemorate the centennial of the 19th Amendment, the one giving women the right to vote. In that light, they probably should have gone with the person who, more than anyone else, was responsible for that Amendment – Alice Paul.

    http://pureblather.com/2015/06/03/the-face-on-the-twenty-dollar-bill/

    Be that as it may, I don’t have any problem with Tubman.

    • BosGrl

      Or we could, you know, add more than one woman to currency. It might be OK to remove some of the “fathers” without destroying our society for all time. English money has the current queen, not Egbert.

  • guppy06

    Fulford points out all sorts of supposedly terrible things about this supposed hero, like the fact that she was illiterate

    You know who else was unlette–

    Whoops, wrong religion. Nevermind.

    • Interestingly enough, some argue that the Prophet of Islam was also suffering from a brain injury.

  • guppy06

    seeing as how there were no women voting prior to the 19th amendment.

    Ehhhh… no. Don’t know about Ms. Tubman specifically, but there were states that allowed women to vote prior to Amendment XIX’s ratification (by states that set their own voting qualifications). Constitutional amendments are about 3/4 of states compelling behavior (in this case women’s suffrage) on the bass-ackward remaining 1/4.

    • notfromvenus

      There were a couple that did, but I think they were all out west. And I think they still only allowed white women to vote.

  • “currency that Obama has devalued to Zimbabwe levels”

    An example of the fact that wingnut beliefs are not amenable to logic or persuasion because you just say things like this to show that you’re part of the club. It’s been Austrian-economics/Libertarian boilerplate since 2008 that quantitative easing would lead to hyperinflation. It has never happened. That’s why your girlie mags still cost $10 not $75 million, dipshit.

    • brucej

      Verily. A friend and former boss won an IgNobel prize ( http://harvardmagazine.com/2015/09/ig-nobel-prizes-2015 that’s him on the left ), and the cash award is YUUUGE: a 1 Trillion Zimbabwean bank note. I think it’s worth something like $1.78 :-)

    • CripesAmighty

      Yup. And notice how when the facts don’t change to prove their narrative, they simply shift the explanation, and… ‘Any day now. You’ll see”.
      It’s their story an’ their stickin’ to it.

  • Gleem-McShinez

    Could they even get more fucking transparent?

    They project that Democrats would have such hatred of “Republicans” — even ones from so long ago that there’s nothing left but the name — that this would somehow pose a problem for any Democrat to even suggest Tubman.

    That’s YOUR problem, fuckweasels. It couldn’t be more glaring, since YOU are the ones stuffing this shitcoat strawman.

    • Funny, the people who express hatred for Abraham Lincoln today do not strike me as either Clinton nor Sanders supporters.

  • Jukesgrrl

    “Anger porn.” Kid Zoom taught me a useful new phrase today. Thanks, Young Friend.

  • IdRatherBeDancing

    Hello you vile bastards … I have been following Wonkers for some time – a shy lad standing over in the corner watching the party. So, I decided to join up on this disk thnigy and say howdy.

    • SDGeoff

      Hi there! Welcome.

    • starfanglednut

      Hi!

    • grageo

      If I were allowed to comment I’d say hi backatya

    • Hardly Ideal

      You’ve yet to veer into homophobic non-sequiturs, so that already puts you leagues above the on-again-off-again troll(s). Have a seat and hold onto yer butts.

      • Malaclypse

        Turgid love muscle libelz!

    • doktorzoom

      Welcome to the Monkey House!

      • AndreWaters20

        Props for a Vonnegut reference!

    • HanBarbara

      Are you the one in the T. rex costume and the tutu? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54SBHobALBQ
      If so you have come to the right place. Welcome.

  • I can’t even with these assholes.

  • Iron Monkey

    Next you’ll be telling us that George Washington was capable of telling a lie.

    I don’t know about that, but he DID throw his wooden teeth across the Delaware.

    • grayone

      Then he stood in the prow of a longboat while his rum fortified soldiers rowed him across to retrieve his teeth….because wooden dentures were very expensive. (Note to self: never stand in the prow of a boat being rowed.)

  • malsperanza

    Since when do wingnuts not appreciate illiteracy?

  • malsperanza

    As a result of the seizures, St. Joan of Arc was apparently delusional.

    As a result of the seizures, St. Theresa of Avila was apparently delusional.

    As a result of the seizures, Saul of Tarsus had a vision on the road to Damascus and was apparently delusional.

    As a result of the seizures, Chief Justice John Roberts was apparently delusional.

    • MrCanoehead

      Plus however many Republican presidential candidates who said that God told them to run.

      • Or a president who could look into Putin’s eyes and see his soul. That’s some world class delusion right there.

        • Be Gin

          The comedian who flogged that schtick was a comic genius!

          I laughed for days when he rolled that out.

          Alas! he has moved on to new pursuits which hold little promise of reaching the heights he achieved when he was dodging shoes in Baghdad!

        • MrCanoehead

          Burn the witch!

      • cleos_mom

        Now, *there’s* an example of God’s sense of humor. (See the Pat Boone discussion)

    • Hardly Ideal

      And like Harriet Tubman (apparently? in wingnut forums, anyway), Joan may be crazy and armed, but she’s the best ya got.

  • malsperanza

    Still, I’ll give points for “enword” and “racist do gooders.” First time I’ve seen “do gooders” used as if it were actually a bad thing to do good, like racism. On a par with “social justice warrior” as an insult and “prevent people from voting” as a mark of honor.

  • harryeagar

    Hmm. So wingnutistan is now uncool with hearing messages from god? Has anybody told Cruz?

    • georgiaburning

      Only certain people can hear the words, Curse of Ham and all that. Go back to season 1, episode 9. (Yes, I know that they retconned a lot of stuff later on)

      • Incoming Ham

        The sound is a dog whistle

  • Blanche Beecham

    There are many mentally sick, angry people in the world – most of them seem to be on the conservative forums. They do seem pretty disenfranchised or just angry.

  • amindofitsown

    I’m not usually a violent person, but the comments do make me feel just a bit stabby…with votes, of course.

  • crazymonkeylady

    May I be so bold as to suggest that those who are uncomfortable with a black woman on the $20, to mail it to Wonkette for further examination? I’m sure that Donna Rose will approve.

    • E.A. Blair

      Or me.

  • Pugsandcoffee

    I wasn’t going to read this because I just got out of the shower, but I did, and now I need another shower.

  • TeeRaak

    Why do we need ANOTHER woman on our money????

    Barbara Bush is already on the $1 bill….

    [Lunch Trigger Warning]
    https://media4.giphy.com/media/LNZ6ctEknc5Zm/200w.gif

  • Scooby

    All these jokes would have worked if we had put Ben Carsons mom on the bill like he wanted.

  • Oh gee, she only saved 70 people from slavery instead of 300? Pfft. Forget about her then.

  • E.A. Blair

    I don’t really care who’d on a bill as long as it spends – except for the $2.00 bill, ’cause Thomas Jefferson is my many-times-great uncle.

    • LadyLaz

      Mine too!

      • E.A. Blair

        My maternal line is from Thomas Stephens and Jane Jefferson (Thomas’ sister). I guess this makes us distant cousins.

        • Parakeetist

          My maternal line is, uh, my Mom.

          • E.A. Blair

            And where did she come from? Was it spontaneous generation? Did a stork bring her? Was she found under a cabbage leaf? Or did she just crawl out from under a rock?

    • I AM R U

      But don’t you know? Because of Obummer, US currency is apparently worth about the same as Zimbabwean currency :)

    • cleos_mom

      The $2 bill is unusually decorative. A merchant in the small town where I live gives them out in change so other local merchants will know that person has been shopping at his store.

      • Lamashtar

        I dislike Jefferson, but the $2 is pretty.

  • bardgal

    They are so twisted with hate they honestly think, “these self serving racist do gooders must be stopped” is coherent English.

  • ContextIsKey

    Hey, Thomas Jefferson freed slaves too, and he wound up on the $10, so of course freeing slaves is noteworthy. Of course, they were his own slaves and he certainly didn’t free ALL his slaves, as that would have been economic suicide for a wealthy planter back in the day. I’m just trying to be glass-half-full here.

  • Last Hussar

    US Money – a source of bemusement. Why are you all so invested in it not changing?

    Back in the 80’s the Royal Mint said £1 notes were basically not economic to produce, and we got the pound coin. That’s about $1.50. And you still (as a country) resistant to replacing a note worth 66 pence.

    Every few year one of our notes changes – the Queen stays of the obverse, but we have all sorts on the reverse – Darwin, women, any old ne’er do well.

    “You’re getting a different fiver”

    “Don’t like it”

    “Tough. What you going to do, refuse to spend money?”

    You are still arguing about chip and pin, while I am using contactless (you do need to actually contact to get the signal, but you get the idea)

    • SnarkOff

      Basically, we suck. Also is chip and pin some kind of British entree?

      • IconDaemon

        Embedded credit card chip and PIN number, perhaps?

        • HanBarbara

          Yes, that’s where instead of swiping your card you shove it in a slot and hope for the best ( a bit like Duggar sexy time). Also if you have a small business you have to buy the new square for $50.00 (the swipe version was free).

          • Last Hussar

            And has lower fraud rate.

            Use an ATM? It’s exactly like that. I haven’t written a cheque in… um I can’t remember.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      The failure of a one $1 coin is due to the fact that they keep making look and feel like a fucking quarter! I’ve been to your country and when I reach in my pocket I can tell by touch which is a £1 pound coin!

  • Howard J. Barnett

    Just call the Seminole Wars what they were. Genocide.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      The treatment of all Native Americans was genocide. I wish the US government would acknowledge that. It happened. We the living, had nothing to do with it. But it DID happen.

      • Howard J. Barnett

        Part of the larger 400 year genocide of all native peoples in the western hemisphere.

  • Kevin Morin

    Former slave on my money? Egads! Slave owners? No problemo.

  • cleos_mom

    Andrew Wilkow skipped the preliminaries and went straight down the concern troll route: why are people talking about the $20 bill when veterans are being neglected and Obamacare is destroying the cosmos as we know it?

    The first reference was to a real issue. All those that followed it were echoes of the people who reacted with indignation over Cecil the Lion’s killing with “wouldn’t it be wonderful if people got as upset over the deaths of abused children?” As if concern over moral outrages was something like a pair of shoes: you can wear only one pair at a time.

  • Snobo

    Serious question intended with respect by somebody who truly enjoys this blog:
    What’s the value of showcasing these comments? Does it do anything to chip away at racism or does it just give a larger platform to some idiots who already take up too much space?

    • paltroony

      Three thoughts: First, posting this stuff is a reminder to me of how grateful I should be for having a mind and being an intelligent human being and not some slit trench toilet lurker. Never, ever forgetting that it was a fortunate roll of the DNA dice that I am what I am, and not in the cave with these ass hats.Second, it is also a reminder to me to never be complacent in my world but always be fucking aware of the ignorance and hate just beyond the fence. And to fight it at every turn. Finally, most of those comments are so pure in their batshit craziness that they actually are interesting to read; the ramblings of damaged and ignorant people.

      • Poe’s Law

        Well aren’t you just the most precious, lucky asshat of all.

        Just so fortunate to not be an ignorant, batshit crazy, ignorant, damaged and deranged person.

        To what do you attribute your good fortune? The grace of God? A decent upbringing? Good character? Or, maybe sheer arrogance?

        • paltroony

          I’m just as fucked up as the next person. But at least I don’t think the earth is flat, that some cosmic muffin sits on a cloud and controls my destiny, that the world is only 6000 years old, that white people are the superior race, that women are subservient to men, that violence is the answer, that LGBT people are freaks and sinners, that science is bunk, that global warming is a farce, that money is the only answer, that books are tools of the devil, that (if I had a womb) it is the property of my husband, that everyone needs a gun strapped to their sides,….you get the idea.

          And yes I owe my “good fortune” to a lot of people. Abused as a kid, a drunk, homeless, made my way through school driving a cab in L.A, made a career for myself and got a lot of scars standing up for people who couldn’t stand up for themselves. And if it is arrogance to say in a public forum that I am glad I am a person who is not a mouth breathing racist or a person who wants to destroy the environment for the sake of corporate profit, then, sir, I am truly arrogant.

        • Last Hussar

          I think that is harsh and uncalled for.

    • Enfant Terrible

      Sunlight.

    • Poe’s Law

      Yes, it does chip away at racism and sexism.

      But that’s all it does.

      Something, but not enough.

      [He excuses himself and steps outside to cry]

    • DutchS

      Try not to hate me too much for this, but I just got back from a 16-day cruise. In that whole time I did not hear anyone say anything like the idiotic comments you see on line. The world is a lot saner than you’d think from reading internet comments. Only a few per cent of readers comment and only a small fraction of a percent are frequent commentators.

  • CriticalDragon1177

    Doktor Zoom,

    ———————————————————————————————————
    To get 10% of highly functioning blacks to ascend into white society by showing how smart they are and the other 90% will follow?

    Problem was, there isn’t 10% of blacks that are highly functioning and the remaining 90% are unable to function in any sustained and meaningful way.

    The bulk of black America hovers right around the cutoff between Dull and Average intelligence.
    ———————————————————————————————————

    One wonders which of the baseless, completely ridiculous, nonsensical conspiracy theories this guy believes explains the success of the both the abolitionist and civil rights movements. Hey loser, I’ll give you a clue which one of them is correct…. NONE!

    Now how is it that the blacks were able to fool white people into thinking that they’re our equals, especially given the fact our “race” is so much “smarter” than theirs? Oh you can’t answer now can you?

    • Poe’s Law

      There is no White race. There is no Black race. Both are illusions foisted upon us by the delussions of the 19th century.

      People are pretty much people. The differences you want to see are the result of both prejudice and systemic discrimination.

      • CriticalDragon1177

        I agree. Too bad there are still racists today. Oh well, its only been about fifty years since the end of legal segregation in this country, and about twenty since the end of South Africa’s version of segregation. Its still too soon for us to expect that type of thinking to have disappeared entirely.

        • Poe’s Law

          Yep. As long as there are people who are willing to be deluded into thinking that they are White, it will not end.

          Only when we light skinned, European descended folk understand that Whiteness is a lie foisted upon us by Power to perpetuate exploitation of us and the brown skinned folk will there be a chance of ending the basic unfairness of the present system

  • Poe’s Law

    Yeah, Harriet Turman was a complete waste.

    Except she overcame a life in slavery

    She overcame severe brain injury

    She rescued a bunch of people from some pretty awful conditions

    She did it several times

    Nah, none of that matters

  • DutchS

    Well, yay, I advocated something and it actually happened. Maybe dumb luck, but hey. Jackson long ago deserved to be booted for the Trail of Tears. Hamilton did more to create the society we now have than most of the other Founding Fathers. Jefferson pictured us a society of happy yeoman farmers, with little or no industry. It was Hamilton who wished to see America as industrial. So I argued all along to change the $20, not the $10. Tubman wan’t my first pick (I wanted Grace Hopper) but I’ll go with it. Anyone who objects, I’ll be happy to take all your Tubmans (Tubmen?)

    • NationalGalleryofClipArt

      What about Grace Jones?

  • Invidosa

    My very favoritist part of this article was when the racist fuckers said they would refuse to use 20$. Oh oh oh and the part where the racist shit weasel said putting a black lady on money is in fact somehow twisted racisim! Wish I brought a soda and some popcorn to this shit show!

  • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

    That damn Robert Byrd! He ruins everything! He’s why we can’t have nice things.

  • YourNameHere

    Even if Harriet Tubman saved literally one person (even if it was herself!) she’s still better than Andrew Jackson. The end.

  • Chase Miller

    Well Harriet Tubman helped John Brown plan and recruit for the raid on Harpers Ferry which led to harsher treatment of slaves and likely extended slavery. She’s like Mary Seacole, because she’s black, she’s viewed as more important than she actually was

    • thixotropic jerk

      Chase, you’re such a sweetheart! Why don’t you make a comment that adds to the discussion instead of your usual snipy, boorish and puerile tripe? Or is your fainting couch out getting re-upholstered? Here’s one for you: “Chase Miller is a lot like Andrew Jackson, because he’s white, he’s views himself as a lot more self-important than he really is.” See? Much better!

      • Chase Miller

        Do you have a mental condition? I’ve never acted like I’m more important than I am. Surely even you can see that there are more significant people that could be on the 20. Do you think I like Andrew Jackson, I’m not aware of anyone who likes Andrew Jackson, I don’t think Andrew Jackson liked Andrew Jackson. And really ” snipy, boorish and puerile tripe,” such colorful, pointless words, but I in fact do not look like a snipe

      • Chase Miller

        I find it strange that for fuck all reasons you would probably oppose HB2. Hasn’t someone told you transgenderism/transsexualism is a mental illness?

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