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She won't even get her hands dirty
She won’t even get her hands dirty

It has come to our attention that a young man on the internet has all the feels for Bernie Sanders. Oh, sorry, we ought to be more specific, oughtn’t we? This particular young man enjoys freelance blogging his undying love for Bernie Sanders at a liberal news website. Still need more hints? It is not H.A. “HAHAHAHAHA Oh God Please Stop” Goodman or that other one, whatshisbucket, Walker Bragman.

This particular young man is called Michael Sainato, and not only does he know, to the very core of his very earnest being, that Bernie Sanders is far superior to every other human being in history, but Mrs. Bernie Sanders is the other greatest human being (for a lady) in history as well:

The past three first ladies; Michelle Obama, Laura Bush, and Hillary Clinton all share a common insincere, yet polished, demeanor inherent with an affluent lifestyle. Senator Bernie Sanders’ wife, Jane O’Meara Sanders, provides an authentic alternative to this status quo.

Please pardon the WTF?! out of us for just a moment to scroll ahead to see if he is joking.

No. He is not joking.

This young man called Michael Sainato offers no examples to prove his assertion that Michelle Obama is “insincere, yet polished” and indistinguishable from the first ladies before her. That might require a full minute of Googling to learn thing one about the country’s first African-American (but totally status quo) first lady, and how can a young earnest Sanders supporter be expected to find the time in his busy schedule of drawing “I heart Bernie” on his notebook?

Had he bothered even to read the one link he provided in his own post, he might have learned that Michelle grew up in “a one-bedroom apartment” on the South Side of Chicago — but the affluent part, we are sure. This daughter of a secretary and a city water plant worker, a descendant of slaves, must have enjoyed quite the pampered upbringing — unlike her superior, Jane O’Meara Sanders:

She grew up in Brooklyn just blocks away from Bernie Sanders childhood home, worked her way through school while raising a family, until her penchant for political involvement caused her to stumble upon Bernie Sanders, who was then running against six time incumbent mayor of Burlington, Vermont, Gordon Paquette.

While Michelle was gallivanting about at Princeton and then Harvard Law, like a typical black woman who takes her silver-platter privilege for granted, Jane Sanders was giving back to The People as a “community youth organizer for the City of Burlington.”

While the first lady has insincerely dedicated her time in the White House to fighting for children’s health and fitness, pfffft, when Mrs. Sanders first moved to Washington DC during her husband’s first term in Congress, she dedicated herself to important matters, like “working on completing her Ph.D in Sociology as her kids finished high school.” That is why, in addition to the many other reasons young master Sainato has plucked from his imagination, Mrs. Sanders stands out from the crowd of identical Stepford first ladies, as “an extension of Bernie’s penchant for focusing on the important issues.”

To be undeservedly fair to young master Sainato, he does not explicitly draw these comparisons between Michelle and Jane. He simply tosses Mrs. Obama’s name into his list — can you really tell the difference between Michelle and Laura Bush anyway? — to get to his even more important point that Hillary Clinton sure is the worst.

Clinton hoity-toity-ed at an Ivy League law school as well, and she has spent her career in public service as nothing more than a get-rich-quick scheme. Also, unlike the Sanders’ marriage, which is obviously the greatest love story ever told, the Clintons’ marriage is “staged, pretentious and predicated on political expediency.” Mr. Sainato does not provide an assessment of the Obamas’ marriage, but we figure, what with Laura and Michelle and Hillary being indistinguishable, at least to Mr. Sainato, it too is a fake (but polished!) political arrangement.

Does not this great nation deserve, at long last and for the very first time, to have have a likable, relatable average American first family?

Jane O’Meara Sanders, like her husband Bernie Sanders, is relatable to the average American, both Republicans and Democrats.

If we wish for it hard enough, we can overthrow the phony establishment Clinton-Bush-Obama status quo. Yes we can! And finally — finally! — we may enjoy the kind of authentic, average American first family from Burlington, Vermont, that Michael Sainato and his equally earnest progressiver-than-thou brethren know we really need to Make America Great Again.

[HuffPo]

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  • Indiepalin

    She was born a poor, black child.

    • baconzgood

      Baconz every time he sees FLOTUS

      • bookish

        That’s OK. Bamz stars in my dreams quite frequently.

  • bookish

    She wears a good Republican cloth coat? It’s been done.

  • cousin itt

    Look kid, in an arm wrestling contest against all other FLOTUS’s (FLOTI?), Michelle would win hands down.

    • Nounverb911

      Arms too! Also.

      • SterWonk

        “… too! Also”

        Didn’t I already correct you about this? It’s “also, too”. ;->

        • dead_elvis

          Yeah, but in this case, the unapproved form scans better. Don’t be a moran, even babbies know this.

          • SterWonk

            (Also, )to(o)uché

  • Msgr_Moment

    I refuse to comment until I learn who this punk kid’s favorite pony is.

    • Ricky Gay

      The one he wished for but sadly never received. FIN

    • Amy Halpern

      its a unicorn

      • Pinkham’s Law

        A Fluffy one, maybe?

    • Amy!

      Twilight Sparkle is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful Doktor I’ve ever known in my life.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …either one of them is better than Donald Trumps mute Fem-Bot

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …this kid would’ve loved Lidnsey Graham’s “rotating First Ladies”!!! Which I honest to God thought was a sexual position until I googled it

    • cousin itt

      I read that as “rotating Fist Ladies” which, is a little awkward.

      • drbloor

        Not to mention an upcharge.

    • Callyson

      “Rotating First Ladies” was a porno a few years ago.

    • Wee Mousie

      Rotating First Ladies travel in the best circles.

  • Pinkham’s Law

    Uh, yeah. I’m going to decide for whom I will vote based on whether or not I like their spouse? Also, too . . . isn’t HuffPo big enough to have editors? That had some seriously unprofessional word salad moments in it!

    • Spotts1701

      I thought HuffPo had moved to the Exposure Dollar economy, and thus editors were redundant.

  • Nounverb911

    Is she related to the late Anne Meara? (Mrs. Sanders, I mean).

  • Spotts1701

    Michelle Obama: An American Story. $6.99 on Amazon, or free at your local library Mr. Sainato. Since you clearly have the intellectual capacity of a toadstool by trying to make such an absurd comparison, a little knowledge may be in order.

  • SomeSpikeOwenWannabe

    At this point, is it outlandish to feel like Bernie and his supporters are trying to do the same thing to the Democratic Party that the Tea Party has done to the Republicans?

  • Ruhe

    Wait, who is this guy? You see this is what happens when Sarah Palin goes twenty minutes without saying something…our attention drifts.

  • BeachLoafer

    can you really tell the difference between Michelle and Laura Bush anyway?

    Well, Michelle’s husband never runned anyone over, that we know of

    • chicken thief

      Wasn’t it Laura herself that oops! killed my best friend! in a car accident?

      • guppy06

        Was it on Fifth Avenue?

        • lroom

          That place is gettin’ dangerous.

      • BeachLoafer

        yeah, I guess it was – though as I recall it was an old boyfriend, not a bestie

        • chicken thief

          YOU WIN THE KEWPIE DOLL!!! (I just googled it.) It was an old boyfriend that was killed, with her and her bestie in the other car.

      • DahBoner

        Killing a man -and getting away with it Scot free- only enhanced LB’s status in Tejas.

  • Callyson

    Asshole, policing the lives of the First Lady =/= being progressive.

    You’re welcome.

    • jmk

      Thank you!!

  • DoILookAmused2u ?

    White people.

    • Sometimes I feel like I should apologize for the behavior of fellow white people.

  • arglebargle

    On the bright side, maybe he’ll buy out Wonkette’s stock of Bernie paraphernalia, thus paving the way for an expanded East Coast tour-a-palooza.

  • OneYieldRegular

    If you ask me, we haven’t had a truly great First Lady since Martha Dinwiddie Butterfield.

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      Dolley Madison had delicious cakes named after her.

      • arglebargle

        cakes we like

      • Didn’t she invent ice cream?

      • Msgr_Moment

        James, on the other hand, was a Twink.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      If only William Rufus King had lived.

  • E S

    Mrs Obama is thoughtful, lovely and intelligent.

    • Brianna Amoré

      Laura Bush can’t hold a candle to her. Nor could Barbara Bush.

  • Come here a minute

    You had me at “America Needs a First Lady Who”. You had me rolling my eyes, because America does not need a first lady at all. (But it’s nice when we get one we like.)

  • docterry6973

    Bernie fanboys annoy the hell out of me.

    • Msgr_Moment

      #allfanboysmatter

      • lroom

        #notheydonot

      • Amy!

        Fan boys are the ones carrying the big leaves, right? I guess Republicans have the trademark on “pool boys”?

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      This is where Trump gets the idea he can swing these folks.

      • SomeSpikeOwenWannabe

        Probably also where Bernie gets the idea he can swing disaffected Trump voters.

        • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

          I’m increasingly uncomfortable with the way that the extreme ends of the spectrum are curving around to meet one another.

          • sw19womble

            Having lived most of my political lifetime ‘out there’, I know what you mean, but it’s always been that way: I’ve been sneered at by marxists and social conservatives in precisely the same fashion. Which is why, in my slightly older years, I’ve come to appreciate that, generally, versions of democratic capitalism are the best workable system that anyone’s come up with to date.

          • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

            I think too many years in grad school taught me that lesson pretty fast and now I’m a comfortably pragmatic dem.

          • sw19womble

            I’m a stubborn bastard and I love me some political-economic theory. But yeah, pragmatically, I like nice centrist governments with a left-leaning social agenda. The previous Conservative/Liberal Democrat coalition in the UK was my ideal, as they both held themselves in check. Wasn’t perfect, but far better than the Conservative government with untrammeled “austerity” economic policy and the old right-wing assholes creeping out the woodwork last year, once they won a clear majority.

          • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

            We are obvi wonketwins.

          • sw19womble

            Don’t worry, like all good political/economic/election wonks, I’m sure we can find lots of minutae to argue about :p

          • cleos_mom

            Discomfort-inducing. But definitely in character.

          • eddi

            Not really surprising. The further out they get the more their rhetoric begins to sound similar. Basically anti-government with a strong dose of conspiracy to commit New World Order. Both have FEMA death camps, UN troops and black helicopters in their nightmares. Both are likely to be armed and idiotic. Hell, Rapture or Harmonic Convergence; cannot even slip a razor blade between them.

          • DahBoner

            Populism is like pop music. No one likes it, but they play it because everyone else plays it.

      • WiscoJoe

        Just rant about the “ESTABLISHMENT” loud enough. I think that’s all it would take.

    • Steverino247

      All fanboys annoy the hell out of me. This clown needs to shut the fuck up.

    • WiscoJoe

      They’re even worse than the Hillary PUMA squad were back in 2008. I didn’t think that was possible.

      • timpundit

        Oh god, I remember that unfortunately.

        • WiscoJoe

          If I have my trajectory right… The anit-Obama, pro-Hillary PUMA people morphed into the anti-Obama firebaggers which now have morphed into the anti-Hillary firebaggers, because ‘establishment’ bad, political revolution, argle bargle.

          • Empy

            It’s ironic, don’tchaknow? Really, it is just that class of person that has to be fighting ‘the man’.

            “Whoever’s on top, whoever’s in power, whoever’s successful, you got to be on the other side or you don’t feel like the smartest guy in the room.” ~Family Guy, of all things, from that Rush Limbaugh episode.

      • DemmeFatale

        Ugh, the PUMAs!
        (Where’s that pic of the ol’ lady with the Kool-Aid?)

    • DahBoner

      They have better weed than Rand fanboys, however

  • SnarkOff

    Look at FLOTUS, about to cram a head of broccoli down some obese little kid’s throat.

    • MrBlobfish

      And that obese little kid grew up to be…………….Michael Sainato.
      Now you know the rest of the story. Good day?

    • Amy Halpern

      oh the horrors of eating healthy,…what a travesty,,,how cruel…

  • MrBlobfish

    What’s his feelings about Zayn Malik leaving One Direction?

    • Anarchy Pony

      Who and what?

    • LarkintheAM

      That’s soooo 2015!

  • Anarchy Pony

    Here’s a thought, don’t be such an asshole.

  • drbloor

    She’s gonna posterize the living twaddle out of that dickwad.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70IcBjR1H80

    • Msgr_Moment

  • Pinkham’s Law

    I have never understood why Michelle (or any other first lady, frankly) comes in for so much criticism. SHE DIDN’T RUN FOR OFFICE, people! Even if she IS a stuck up bitch, or a bit barmy, or whatever – she’s actually a private citizen. Leave her alone, FFS.

    • SomeSpikeOwenWannabe

      I also don’t know what the writers of columns like this want or expect of first ladies. It’s not like there are more similarities than differences between the last few first ladies and it’s really ignorant to claim that you can’t tell the difference.

  • timpundit

    Ick. These types of Liberals help me understand why white America is so mad at them.

    • eddi

      We all know a village idiot.

  • HobbesEvilTwin

    hardcore Bernie supporters: ensuring progressives can continue to use the term “libtard” in a not ironic way.

  • MrBlobfish

    Here we see Michael Sainato working on his next column: http://images.agoramedia.com/wte3.0/gcms/let-your-kids-get-messy-07-pg-full.jpg

    • Ricky Gay

      cute boy libelz!

    • Early onset male patterned baldness libelz!!!

      • eddi

        He does have the hairline I had at 30.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You sure that’s not Ross Douchehat?

  • WiscoJoe

    I like your Bernie. I do not like your Bernie Bros. Your Bernie Bros are so unlike your Bernie.

  • DoILookAmused2u ?

    Let me guess. White kid who grew up in a lower middle class home in a moderate sized city and who doesn’t know he is probably a little bit racist?

    • WiscoJoe

      But he took a semester of Afro-American studies back in college so he’s totally an expert on not being racist. I’m sure he would love to tell you all about it. Really open your eyes, man. Like, did you even realize what it means to be black in America? This guy definitely does… Hey, have you heard this new mixtape by Run the Jewels? Will blow your mind. You can’t even imagine what it’s like.

      • DoILookAmused2u ?

        Back when I was a kid, kids like this complained about “The system”, now it’s “The establishment”. Same same.

        • WiscoJoe

          You say you want a revolution? Well, you know, we all want to change the world…

          Same as it ever was.

          • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

            Or “the man” also he has some black friends and he knows they’re cool with him because they laugh at the racist jokes he tells completely tongue in cheek.

            The Bernie Bro thing is a problem for the real Bernie (who is a great guy). It’s this bad before Iowa; what’s next?

          • WiscoJoe

            It definitely feels ‘bad’ on the internet, but I’m not sure if that will translate into real life or not. Will these people actually show up in person?

            And if Bernie starts winning primaries, becomes the defacto “Democratic establishment,” and starts having to actually deal with moderate and non-socialist voters, will his current coalition hold? Or will they disperse looking for ideologically purer pastures?

            I have no idea what will happen this election cycle. Buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy ride. (Or it will be really anti-climactic and totally predictable…)

          • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

            Yeah it may only be really exciting for about 6 weeks and then it’ll be clear what’s happening.

            I think the internet phenomenon is, in and of itself, problematic for Bernie. Because his followers sound (even if they are not) increasingly out of touch with ya know… reality.

            As for whether or not they will vote…. my guess is that they will vote, in concentrated areas. He’ll do better in places with primaries than in places with caucuses.

          • WiscoJoe

            If I had to predict, Bernie is more Howard Dean than he is Barack Obama. But this election cycle doesn’t seem very kind to these sorts of predictions, so idk.

            I mean, Dean had one super-embarrassing on-camera moment following a defeat in the Iowa Caucus, and his hip, young supporters totally abandoned his campaign.

          • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

            He’s no Barack Obama, but there is a delusion that he is. The Dean observation is right on. We’ll see.

  • cousin itt

    Well, why didn’t you tell me he writes for HuffPo? I could have skipped this post entirely.

    • SnarkOff

      To be fair, pretty much anyone with a pulse and wifi writes for HuffPo.

      • Zippy

        only the ones who don’t want to get paid

    • deanbooth

      He’s in the Snide Boob section.

    • CalvinianChoice

      Fuckin’ HuffPo. I hate the fuckin’ HuffPo.

  • AntiDerpomeme

    Oh good, we are finally focusing on the real issues that matter when considering leadership, which lady is the biggest bitch.

    Sigh.

    • Msgr_Moment

      Trump’s is pretty easy on the eyes. Just sayin’.

      • Callyson

        Honey, you really need new glasses, stat…

        ETA: oh, wait, you meant Melania. Never mind…

      • AntiDerpomeme

        Pro’lly not uppity, either.

      • sw19womble

        Eyes over easy, more like. :-o

      • Squirrel_t_robot

        For a Yugo.

      • guppy06

        She’s paid to be. And when the warranty runs out, we’ll be treated to a new First Lady, as the party of family values becomes the first party to have a divorce in the white house.

        • Msgr_Moment

          Maybe she’ll get to keep the house.

          • sw19womble

            of Representatives? Sure. Then redraw all the gerrymandered districts, and start again.

  • guppy06
    • Call Batman, the Mad Hatter has brainwashed some poor young woman!

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      We missed out on his UFO stories also too.

      And suing everybody all of the time.

      • sw19womble

        Well, President Trump will take care of the latter.

    • LarryHoudini

      Jesus is she hot!!
      Wait—let me put my hand over what’s his name next to her . . .
      Hmm, yeah, she’s okay I guess.

    • Jeamonn

      Does she just pull him out of a drawer when she is feeling frisky?

    • JH Marx

      If Gov Moon Beam had made it, Linda Ronstadt cudda been 1st lady.

  • DahBoner

    She grew up in Brooklyn…. until her penchant for political involvement caused her to stumble upon Bernie Sanders, who was then running against six time incumbent mayor of Burlington, Vermont

    From Brooklyn to Vermont. That’s a pretty big stumble.
    https://media4.giphy.com/media/rvasIXgTtFkze/200w_d.gif

    • Callyson

      From Brooklyn to Vermont. That’s a pretty big stumble.

      Unless you’re into skiing, and don’t want to move away from the East Coast. So there’s that…

      • DoILookAmused2u ?

        You can go skiing in the Catskills. Vermont is a trip, and there’s no good route.

        And flying into Burlington in the Winter is not recommended if avoidable.

        • Squirrel_t_robot

          I grew up skiing the Catskills.

          • DoILookAmused2u ?

            I lived in Hudson Valley for 10 years. Know the area.

            Scary flight–flying into Burlington in the Winter in a commuter plane where I could see right into the cockpit.

            As we approached, I notice the runway is at an angle to us, so I asked the pilot, “shouldn’t we straighten out”? He yells, “No! Wind sheer! We’d splat all over the runway”.

          • sw19womble

            The landing at London Gatwick yesterday evening was like that. It narrowly beat out the flight a couple of years ago from SF to Vancouver, where the outside of the cabin creaked as if was shunted sideways somewhere around to the US/Canada border during descent.
            I hate crosswinds. :/

          • bobbert

            The old Hong Kong airport, where you could see peoples laundry hanging out to dry as you went by it.

      • bobbert

        Well, I learned last fall that one of my high school classmates, who went to college in Boston, eventually stumbled over Angus King in Maine, and they’ve been married for twenty-five years or so.

        (That’s pretty much how she explained it to me).

    • Spotts1701

      That’s what happens when you trip on Crown Point.

  • LarryHoudini

    Goodbye, gridlock! Americans from both sides of the political spectrum can now come together, lock arms in teary-eyed embrace, and yes, be one nation again, united by the earthy, smart, and sexy(?)(in an unshaved armpit sort of way) next first lady Jane Sanders!
    By the way, I hear she makes a great vegetarian quinoa casserole!
    What the fuck do you mean that doesn’t sound good?

  • Squirrel_t_robot

    Hillary and Michelle: the only FLOTUS’ with law degrees, and both earned the most coin in their marriages.

    • chicken thief

      I think Barry’s book royalties have surpassed Michelle’s earned salary, but in salaries alone – ya.

      • Squirrel_t_robot

        But that wasn’t until after Obama started running for POTUS.

        Up until then, Michelle was bringing home the bacon.

        • rebecca

          you know WHO ELSE brings home the bacon?

          me :D

          • UnsaltedSinner

            Wonkette babby libelz!

          • sw19womble

            I was going to go for Joni Ernst, but okay!

          • Zippy

            that ain’t bacon

          • Come here a minute

            Ted Cruz! Oh wait, you didn’t say machine-gun bacon.

          • And fry it up in a pan?

          • thenearesthippie

            And never let Shy forget he’s a man?

          • Zippy

            on a machine gun barrel?

        • chicken thief

          “…and both earned the most coin in their marriages.”

          NO FAIR ADDING CAVEATS AFTER THE FACT!11!!!

  • As much as I, a Bernie booster, resent the efforts of some to pull leftists’ social justice-y heartstrings in favor of Hillary just because Bernie is a white man…yeah, this shit still pisses me off.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    I love Bernie, but his brogressive fanboys are hard to stomach. I particularly enjoyed the fact that H. A. Goodman has abandoned his former extra special super-duper 2016 presidential candidate Rand Paul for Bernie. To think, just two years ago they were going to love each other forever!

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/h-a-goodman/im-a-liberal-democrat-im_b_6169542.html

    Truly a dudebro for all seasons.

  • timpundit

    I’d like to think that Bernie, if he read it and was nearby, would slap the shit out of this kid.

    • Vincent Ricola

      Agree. Bernie has proven himself to be above most of the garbage slinging so far. I don’t think he’d be okay with this guy calling out random first ladies in the name of his campaign.

      • Zippy

        That’s the thing I wish the fanatic Bern Bros would learn- their hero Sanders would likely be the first one to tell them to shut the fuck up and act like an adult

    • Gristle McThornbody

      I hope and think that Bernie, if he doesn’t get the party nom, will beg demand that his supporters back Hillary. I can’t even imagine any progressive being such a douche dribble, sitting out the next election in a snit, that they would risk having even MORE fucking Republics (just returning the favor) slither into office.

      I also hope and think Hillary will do the same if Bernie gets the nod.

      • Zippy

        I’m sure either one will do so for the other- but I can see plenty of childish Dems sulking and staying home if they don’t get their pony. Unfortunately, that SOP for the libtards, circular firing squad- snatching defeat from the jaws of victory

    • lroom

      I believe he would. Bernie’s cool like that.

  • jviscont1

    he sounds like he should be endorsing Lindsey Graham.

    • Ricky Gay

      is that what they are calling it now?

  • WiscoJoe

    A song for the Bernie Bros:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGLGzRXY5Bw

    • Villago Delenda Est

      “But if you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, you ain’t gonna make it with anyone anyhow.”

  • Cismontane

    Actually, I’ve been noticing that most of the many many propaganda gifs posted on Facebook by Bernie supporters are consistently short on facts. Hillary’s alleged A rating from the NRA was my personal favorite. Come on, we’re not Trump supporters, people…

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      It amuses how many lies people tell about Hillary to somehow prove Hillary is the REAL liar.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Pretty much anytime someone posts one of those blatantly false memes, I reply with a link to snopes. Yeah, I’m *that guy* on facebook.

      • jmk

        We should ALL be that guy on Facebook.

        No one gets anywhere by lying like a common Palin.

    • MrBlobfish

      Tom Delay sez she’s about to be indicted.

      • Zippy

        because the FBI totes shares intel with convicted felons

        • DemmeFatale

          And they do not INDICT anyone.

          • thenearesthippie

            Thank you. That’s been bugging me.

      • JMP

        Sure, all the dozens of investigations into her emails have concluded that she did absolutely nothing illegal, but that won’t stop yet another witch hunt to try and smear her yet again and create any excuse possible to dishonestly claim that she’s dishonest and a lawbreaker.

        • Zippy

          It’s like listening to Linus Van Pelt come up with “new” info proving the existence of the great pumpkin. JUST YOU WAIT! THIS TIME IT’S REAL!

          • JMP

            But remember, after the many years of chasing after allegations of wrongdoing by her husband that all turned out to be complete bullshit, wasting many tens of millions of the government’s money chasing down phony scandals to find any excuse possible to impeach him, Ken Starr eventually discovered that he – got a blowjob! So hey, maybe these endless BENGHAZI!!!! investigations will eventually uncover some real wrongdoing by Hillary Clinton, like discovering that she drank in college when she was only 19, or that she sometimes goes 40 in a 35 mph zone.

          • Zippy

            40 in a 35 mph zone?

            Bitch better be in the slow lane…

          • Villago Delenda Est

            Keep in mind that Ken Starr wanted to end the investigations because they were going nowhere, some Rethug congressmen and appointed judges took him aside and told him to keep looking for something, anything to smear Clinton with, and he did as he was ordered, and viola, we had Monica and the entire BJ/stained blue dress/cigar sampling and Sam Donaldson creaming his own pants live on national television shitshow.

          • SageofShaw

            Ha, they *will* find out that she drank when she was only 19, and make ads about it… leaving out that the drinking age back then was 18.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Tom DuhLay knows all about being indicted.

      • CalvinianChoice

        Tom Delay reads the NYT?

      • Cismontane

        well.. indictments are something he would know about… from personal experience I mean.

  • Poly_Ester

    If I were Jane, I’d staart looking for a post-doc somewhere far from D.C.

  • timpundit

    For my money I always wanted John Dingle (D-FunnyTweets) to be President because his wife’s name is “Debbie” and I could say “Debbie Dingle” over and over again and not get sick of it.

    • sw19womble

      Dingle/O’Malley 2020!

  • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

    1. Jane Sanders is legit cool. 2. No woman should be described as an “extension” of her husband 3. Don’t EVEN talk about FLOTUS like that.

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      I’ve no doubt Bernie married himself an intelligent and legit cool lady.

      But there is little point to subject First Ladies to a caged death match.

      Which the meanest FLOTUS ever would win, BTW: Barbara Bush.

      But still.

      • zanzibar_buckbuck_mcfate

        Totes dubs as my daughter would say (it means ‘you bet’ but we don’t know why).

        Let’s go old school: Dolly Madison. Have you watched the first ladies episode of Drunken History?

      • limberrat

        I’d put my money on either Mary Todd Lincoln (she may be small, but don’t underestimate her size) or Nancy Reagan (she might conjure up a ghost or demon she pull up during one of her seances!).

        • SomeSpikeOwenWannabe

          I wouldn’t want anything to do with Mary Todd Lincoln. She looks like she could probably take 25% of the presidents in a fight.

          • sw19womble

            At the same time.

          • eddi

            She was the sort who would really berserk out on someone.

        • marxalot

          Eleanor Roosevelt drove through the Deep South with a gun in the passenger seat when told that her safety could not be guaranteed by the state police.

      • elvigy

        Weeellll….Laura Bush is the only one that can point to an actual dead body as an accomplishment. So there’s that.

        And no, Vince Foster doesn’t count as he is not dead, he’s in hiding in Paraguay with Hitler and Elvis.

        • sw19womble

          BENGHAZI LIBELLLLLAAAZZZII!!!!

          • cleos_mom

            Thom Hartmann will be chanting that before this is over.

        • Beaumarchais?

          That dead body? IT VAS HER BOYFRIEND!!1! (True fact.)

        • Little Lulu

          Laura liked to say she was “cleared of wrongdoing” in that head on collision. The fact is that she wasn’t even charged, considering she was driving and hit her ex-boyfriend’s car head on. She wasn’t tested for alcohol. Because Texas.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Richard Nixon on Barbara Bush: “She knows how to hate.”

        • CalvinianChoice

          “Richard Nixon on Barbara Bush”. Too horrible to contemplate.

        • Little Lulu

          Yes. The first time I read this was in the Austin Chronicle in an article by Louis Dubose (who co-authored SHRUB with Molly Ivins). From October 13, 2000:

          Gore Vidal doesn’t think much of the Bushes, which is no surprise. And according to Vidal, neither did Richard Nixon, who once observed that Bush the Elder was the “sort of person you appoint to office” rather than the sort of person you could envision in the White House. But Nixon admired Barbara Bush — because “she knows how to hate.”

          I loved Louis Dubose’s work so much during this very depressing period that I wrote him a fan letter (he lived next door to an Austin friend).

  • JMP

    Gee, I wonder people get the impression that some Sanders supporters are mostly against Clinton because she fails to have what they believe to be the most important qualification for the Presidency, a penis.

    Note that I said “some Sanders supporters”, but at some ostensibly left corners of that luckily don’t include Wonkette (*couch* Salon *cough*), any time someone points out that some X are misogynist, they’re immediately met with, “How dare you say all X are misogynist, not all are!”.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      #notallsanderssupporters

      • cleos_mom

        NASS.

  • chicken thief

    If Jane promises not to spend $400M trillion dollars on vacays to India like Mooshell did then I’ll vote for Bernie.

    • ag8grl

      you do know this isn’t true, right? that amount was a fox lie to begin with. and that there’s a real fiscal limit on presidential vacays and all overage is covered by the prez and family.

      • Zippy

        Louie Gohmert assured him it was real

      • chicken thief

        Yes. Thank you. Maybe if I’d have spelled out million then $400 million trillion would have been more obvious?

      • bobbert

        Of course he does. Zippy has been here for years.

  • Jason M

    Where “she stumbled upon Bernie Sanders”. Makes him sound like a dusty pirate map hidden in an old book in her grandma’s attic.

    • sw19womble

      Or drunk on the sidewalk, with one shoe in the gutter, slurring out a jumble of random Ginsberg and Keynes quotes to nobody in particular.

      • TheBidenator

        That’s how Boehner’s wife met him only he was quoting Heinlein and the drunks from various John Wayne films….

        • H0mer0

          Oh lookie here, another Jeet Heer reference in as many days:

          Libertarian Madness
          Robert A. Heinlein became increasingly right wing, and his novels suffered for it
          By Jeet Heer

          https://newrepublic.com/article/118048/william-pattersons-robert-heinlein-biography-hagiography
          June 8, 2014

          • bobbert

            1. Ain’t gonna waste the time to read it.

            2. Bob’s later novels suffered from the fact that he got “yell at clouds” old. I don’t even think I’d call him right-wing. Just grampa.

          • Frank Underboob

            I always wondered what the deal was with his marriages. Now I’m thinking that maybe it’s just as well he didn’t have any kids.
            Thanks for the info.

    • leemoder

      Do the Truffle Shuffle!

    • drbloor

      Treasure maps are less rumpled.

  • Brewerofbeers

    “Michael Sainato and his equally earnest progressiver-than-thou brethren know we really need to Make America Great Again”

    Oh, look, another trite attempt at a guilt by association piece.

  • Mavenmaven
    • sw19womble

      Ugh.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Talk about your unforced errors.

    • cousin itt

      Not has he only jumped the shark, he fucked the poor fish in its fish ass and then jumped over it.

      • jmk

        But in a low-energy kind of way.

    • Pinkham’s Law

      Yeah, I haven’t seen it run yet, but . . . that’s not gonna help him.

    • CalvinianChoice

      Tried to jump the shark. Stalled out on the ramp six months ago.

    • TheBidenator

      Should I see if I can find a collection of boxers punching themselves in the face? Because that pretty much describes the JEB! campaign to a T…..also, I don’t wish Terri Schaivo’s fate on anyone, but if that should happen to a close family member of Jebs I won’t be the least bit bothered.

      • eddi

        Jeb? inaction (stet).

    • clubseal

      That headline makes it sound like some sort of Lazarus situation. Is the Schiavo thing far enough in the past for a Bush to rewrite history and say she lived?

    • lroom

      As I said yesterday that’s freakin sick.

    • TheBidenator

      I renew my previous observation that shit like this is why it never gets old watching Trump belittle and tear down this asshole- sure Trump himself is a dildo boat loaded with bags of dicks but Jeb is like a Conga line of used Oregon militia dildos….

    • w9anthimos

      To be fair, that probably was the high point of Jeb!’s conservative political career, other than the whole rigging of the votes in Florida to favor dubya thing back in ’00.

      • eddi

        I doubt the hanging chad was his idea. Dad and Mom probably threatened to cut off his… inheritance.

    • UnsaltedSinner

      Anyone who switches to Jeb! after seeing that has seceded from humanity.

      • eddi

        Then he may finally steal Trump’s thunder, and voters.

    • bobbert

      Holy Mother of Fuck. Jeb! himself brought up Terri?

  • crunchyknee

    But, LOOK AT MICHELLE’s ARMS! Wouldn’t you kill to have arms like that?

  • whitroth

    Just sayin’ this seems a tad excessive about some blogger no one’s ever heard of….

    mark

  • Truthiness2U

    Well at least Michelle didn’t have an issue at her private sector job.
    http://vtdigger.org/2015/09/13/jane-sanders-overstated-donation-amounts-in-loan-application-for-burlington-college/

    neener neener.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    As I alluded to in a previous non-existent thread today, I like Bernie, but some of his supporters give me the willies.

    • Anarchy Pony

      That’s true of just about all the candidates.

      • Mr Corrections

        It is. It’s more true of Sanders than Hillz, though, at least on the internets.

  • BearGHAZI

    JANE SANDERS 2020

    • Pinkham’s Law

      What, you want that Bernie should only have one term?

  • Zippy

    That Walter Bragman seems nice. And by nice, I mean an insufferable twit…

  • starfanglednut

    Bernie bros: white men telling POC and women who they should vote for. I’m voting for Bernie in the primary, but fuck these guys.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      My state’s primary is way late in the process…if Bernie is still around, I’ll vote for him. But yes, fuck those guys. They’re not helping Bernie at all with this shit.

    • clubseal

      Don’t most people, when arguing for a candidate, tell other people who they should vote for? Asking for a friend.

      • eddi

        Yeah. But when a Dem does it you expect argument concerning stands on the issues. Not about how their wives rate on a “hot to not” scale. That’s Reb territory and already overloaded with dipshits.

        • clubseal

          “Overloaded with dipshits” should probably be etched on the Earth’s tombstone when it dies.

      • Mr Corrections

        There’s been a lot – a LOT – of whitesplaining to minorities that they just don’t understand what is best for them from the more condescending Bernbots. It’s pretty uncomfortable to be around.

  • Sainato’s argument was already stupid the first time around.

  • natoslug

    Huh. I thought the MRAs would throw their support behind Trump. I stand corrected.

  • elviouslyqueer

    I just heard some male Bernie supporter on NPR literally sobbing out his adoration for Sanders and declaiming that “He’s… our… last… chance.”

    I’m surprised people in neighboring states didn’t stand up and applaud at the way I started using “fuck” like a comma.

    • DahBoner

      Tom Hartman’s theory is that rapid social change tends to happen after economic shocks. Just look what happened after the 2008 crash (gays & ganja).

      Don’t worry, Bernie supporter. There will be another crash coming soon. The odds will only accelerate if more Republican politicians keep destroying the social safety net. More opportunity for social change…

    • Mr Corrections

      On Daily Kos there are people who literally think the world will end if Sanders isn’t elected. And for once I’m using “literally” to mean literally (although nb it’s always been a contranym, don’t let anyone give you shit for using it to mean “figuratively”).

      Anyway don’t go there, it’s fucking Huffpo levels of gross these days.

      • bobbert

        I will always give you shit for using it to mean “figuratively”. This is why we have different words.

    • natoslug
      • bobbert

        wut

  • hvdv

    The University of Binghamton gave an English degree to someone who uses the word “relatable.” Let that sink in, and then weep with me.

    • bupkus23

      Hey, he’s apparently Florida Man now ( lives in Gainesville, FL ). Surrounded by all the yahoos in North Central Florida, he’s kinda been infected by the idiocy.

  • Bob Leurck

    Wow. No Michelle love here ! Two income family is only poor to the highest of the affluenzas ! No wonder a great divide between the affluenzas generations

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Damn. Since when did progressives become mysogynistic tools? Hey, douche bro, there is NO republican who relates to Sanders on account of the D next to his name. First thing. And second thing of course, a woman’s worth being wholely based by her merit as an extension of her husband is NOT A COMPLIMENT

  • Man if he thinks Jane Sanders has the common touch he’ll flip when he reads Columba Bush’s biography!

  • TheBidenator

    I’m sorry but I’m not sold on the Bern and here’s why: he’s so calcified in his views. I read this profile about Ted Cruz and one of the points raised about why letting Ted Cruz anywhere near the white house is that he arrived in college with a fully-formed, totally hardened worldview. Having one of those tends to make someone impervious to facts and Bernie has maintained the same views for the entirety of his political life. Now this can make him attractive by being consistent and therefore earnest and predictable to me this makes him a liability because what if he wants to do something and it fails? How is he going to persuade even a democratic congress should a miracle happen and we get one to go along with him?
    I’m not sold on Hillary because she has problems with being earnest but what I like about her is she does adjust to the facts. Either way, I’m not entirely sold on either of them- I’ll support either of them in the general but my gut says if the D’s feel the Bern we’re going to take a bath in 2016….

    • DahBoner

      I think the word you want is iconoclast, not ideologue. Bern’s plan will disrupt the Status Quo, not fiddle around the edges.

    • natoslug

      He may be old, and he may be kind of screamy and look like he’s apoplectic a lot, but when he starts talking, he doesn’t sound calcified. I think he’s done a good job dealing with whatever the Clinton campaign has thrown his way, as her campaign has done with most of what the Sanders campaign has thrown her way. Depending on your political bent, they both have some decent qualities. Personally, I want the possibility of greater social change, and maybe someone who is serious about financial reform, so I really hope Bernie gets the vote. If we take a bath in 2016, well, anyone on the right who wins should hopefully be able to give America a strong enough nudge in the wrong direction that I can seek political asylum in a country with one of those functioning democracy thingies I keep hearing about.

      • Lady Bug

        If Bernie wins the primary, I don’t see him winning the general election. The thing is, I can’t afford (literally & figuratively) a Republican presidency that would push back on any accomplishments & reforms made during the Obama years.

        Let’s just say that Sanders is elected POTUS, with a Republican Congress, how is going to push through his reforms? Obama barely got Obamacare passed and the Republicans are still trying to dismantle it. How would Bernie get single payer passed?

        I like Bernie. I think Bernie is an important voice to have in the Senate, I think it is important to have someone coming from the left & opening up a dialogue on issues like income inequality. But I just don’t see him as being able to get elected never mind enact any of his agenda.

        • Mr Corrections

          I basically agree. He’s got better policies on many (def. not all) issues, but there’s no way he’s as effective a politician as Hillary. If you don’t believe me, re-watch those hearings where she effortlessly dismantles and then slowly murders the careers of a bunch of Republicans over the course of eleven hours.

        • natoslug

          Don’t burst my bubble! I’m hoping the fact that he’s white will hold some sway with the other side. They’ll have to switch to Jew-baiting, and that will hopefully be a little harder to pull off than their current race-baiting. And if the GOP has no interest in getting anything done, it won’t matter who we vote in, as they will continue to be obstructionists regardless of whether we elect Sanders, Clinton, or Vermin Supreme.

          • DemmeFatale

            Nah, I used to live in NY when Hillary was my Senator.
            The Reeps were surprised at how effective she was at crossing the aisle and working with them. (Of course, there were fewer idiots then.)

          • Lady Bug

            But I would be worried about the Republicans using the “ooogie boogie socialism” label against Sanders. I know ‘socialism’ isn’t quite the scary label it was a few decades ago, and I think Sanders very effectively described being a democratic-socialist at that CNN thingy; but I can just see the attack ads against Bernie right now.

            I know in 08 Palin tried that “pallin around with terrorists” thing against Obama, and there was the whole birtherism & secret Muslim thing (gee, aren’t you glad we’re passed that now?! ;) ) but the attacks were 1) completely untrue and 2) in 08 the democrats & independents were really motivated to not vote in a republican president. I don’t think democrats have the same sort of “luxury” this time.

            Of course they have attacks against Hillary, but we already know what the attacks are going to be-and we know, based on the Benghazi hearings that she can more than handle herself against these attacks.I think most people know where they stand WRT to Clinton. With Sanders, I’m more afraid of people who don’t necessarily have an opinion falling for the “Commie Sanders wants to throw you in the gulag” ad Trump is filming in his basement right now.(Probably with slave labor from Mexico, it would be irresponsible not to speculate).

          • No, they’ll pull out all his old quotes, like “nationalizing the oil companies” along with others to paint him as a die-hard commie who wants to make the country into a new Soviet Union. Don’t forget his single payer plan, which people are going hear as “high taxes, government between you and your doctor.”

          • natoslug

            Whereas high healthcare costs, and an insurance company between you and your doctor is the perfect plan. I think I’m starting to understand why I don’t like people. Not you, of course. The people of Wonkette are the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful people I’ve ever known in my like. Except Neilist, there at the end, when he lost it.

          • starfanglednut

            Jeez, I’d forgotten about Neilist! Kinda miss the guy. Didn’t he come back for a bit as something something roosevelt?

          • natoslug

            Yes, and one other persona, I think. I forget which one that was.

          • All I have to do, being a pragmatic liberal with a functional memory, is look back at the Republican campaigns of 2010 against Obamacare. I guarantee you they’ll dust off and polish up every one of those slogans, and since Bernie is thoughtfully proposing actual socialized medicine, it makes it that much easier for them to attack. Add in his proposal to pay for it, a pretty large tax increase on everyone, and you can bet they’ll push that for all it’s worth.

            Now, the other big problem I’ve pointed out to a number of Bernie’s supporters is that it doesn’t matter how excited they are about his ideas. Sure, as hypothetical ideals they’re great. The real problem is “the details,” and actually getting them through Congress. There’s a rather naive belief that he’ll sweep into office with “a mandate” and somehow Congress will bend to his will. I’m rather old and cynical, and think that’s about as likely as my winning the lottery.

      • TheBidenator

        Bernie is an overcorrection on the left the way the tea party was on the right. The problem with Bernie is like I said, he’s calcified in his views and it’s inflexibility that is the problem. Bernie has good ideas but he’s unreasonable in how he goes about them and the way Congress is behaving tells me that all we’ll get is more gridlock and less accomplished. That may be true as it is but I just don’t see tossing another utterly inflexible, ideological politician into the mix as being a solution to what is wrong with the government….

  • Paperless Tiger

    Why is status quo always the enemy? Lately SQ seems to be about job growth and cheap gas. Am I a sellout if I get behind that?

  • Jeamonn

    Am I missing the point to this article? Is it that there are assholes that support Sanders? Or is it that this guy is such a spectacular asshole he deserves special mention?

    • mailman27

      Ya got me! Never heard of the guy.

    • Peter James

      A little bit from column A and a little bit from column B….

    • DemmeFatale

      I think he thought he found a clever way to diss Hillary, but it didn’t really work out like that.
      Noob!

      • Zippy

        Should have stuck to dick jokes, like yer wonket

    • YourMom

      I wonder if it occurred to him that –if we were taking into account the First Spouse… we’re looking at Bill, or Mrs. Sanders or…whomever the Rs toss our way.

      • Amy!

        I think Bill’d make a great First Lady. We can kickstart him a nice blue formal, and a tastefully decorated hanger for his sax, with sapphires, or lapis lazuli.

        Actually, I could see him wearing it, like to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, or something.

        • bobbert

          You have just given me a vision of him at the Inauguration Ball in a blue tux of exactly the same hue.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Never pee on that third rail, Michael….

    • sw19womble

      And never whizz on the electric fence…
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5X5z0yYGgl4

      • r m reddicks

        It’s all in the timing of the pulses for maximum pulsation pleasure.

      • natoslug

        I’ve only done it twice. There will never be a third time.

  • TheBidenator

    Yeah ya know I don’t think Bernie’s wife has ever had her head super-imposed onto a gorilla’s body by white people….just sayin’.

  • lucidamente

    Don’t get him started on Jill Biden.

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      No one can stand her. She’s more hated in DC than the Cruzer.

  • Vecciojohn LLC

    Do we know the age this young judge of female character? Maybe his brain isn’t fully developed
    yet.

  • Sheepshagger

    i will put my rage off to one side and just offer you my favourite photo.

    • FlownOver

      brb…

      • badphairy

        Something something bunk.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      That image is burning a hole in my monitor.

    • Helena Handbag

      She looks maaahhhvelous!

    • DemmeFatale

      OMG, I’ll miss her!

      • eddi

        Hopefully they will follow Jimmy Carter into public service.

  • Cheesus Crust

    I think back to what Gandhi had to say about Christians… I like your Bernie, I do not like your Berniebots – such fucking tools! (I paraphrase). #notallsanderssupporters*

    *Obligatory disclaimer

  • Msmlg1979

    Yesterday, my goal was to have a penis, so I, alsotoo, could be a “very important person”. Today, my new goal is to be an extension of a husband’s penchant. Any husband. Any penchant.

    • BigBoppa

      If you’re finished with it, what did you do with that penis. Asking for a friend of a friend.

      • Msmlg1979

        You do NOT want to know!

        • Amy!

          Lorena?

          • Msmlg1979

            Damn thing’s lost in my purse, like everything else!

  • El Cid

    Well actually I did a postdoc research project on Neo-Marxian Firstladyotics at the imaginary university in my head and I am still enjoying the standing ovation I received for it at the Super Awesome Marx People convention that I am fantasizing about so actually

  • Iam Reading

    Sainato, you aren’t helping just STFU

  • Summarized: We should all vote for Bernie because his wife would make a great First Lady, unlike all those other women. Never mind anything like Bernie’s policy ideas, or what he’d do in office, they’re not important. Got it.

    • natoslug

      Did he also point out how unladylike Bill is? I can’t be bothered to read the full post from Sainato because just the excerpts exceed my douchebro threshold, so I haven’t heard how impressive or disappointing he considers the Mr. Clinton as First Lady.

      • I’m sure Bill looks terrible in a dress, and he probably doesn’t even shave his legs! So tacky!

        • Mr Corrections

          If you don’t think Bill Clinton would shave his legs if there was even the slightest chance of him getting laid, you don’t know Bill Clinton.

          • badphairy

            Bill would shave his legs, wear Chanel No 5, and get his back waxed.

      • DemmeFatale

        Ooooo, Big Dog as first gentleman!
        I can’t wait to see RWNJ heads assploding!

    • 2Girls1Cubs

      Behind every man….

      • natoslug

        There’s potentially a train being pulled?

        • kaw143

          Radio Flyer or GTFO!

    • Anarchy Pony

      This is ‘Muricah! You think anybody here votes on policy like some limp dick pinko commie!?

    • badphairy

      Hey, they’re hanging Bill’s legacy on Hillary, goose gander.

  • Bad Granny

    Bless his heart…

  • marxalot

    I am concerned by his description of a woman as an “extension” of her husband’s political inclinations.
    That sounds positively Clintonian.

    • eddi

      If not absolutely Republican.

      • BigBoppa

        If not Augustan. (That Livia was a total beeyotch).

    • proudgrampa

      It sounds positively sexist, to me.

  • Msmlg1979

    I can’t wait to see the sexist MRA dudebros heads exploding if we have a First Gentleman. Is that what we would call him? Will he be asked his favorite cookie recipe??

    • Spotts1701

      Nah. Favorite burger or BBQ recipe.

      • Msmlg1979

        Something..hearty, manly, meaty, with substance. Not something all dainty and crumbly that dissolves in milk like cookies and ladies.

        • bobbert

          Mmm. Bill’s a vegan these days, iirc.

      • DemmeFatale

        Yeah, what’s up with BBQ?
        I spend an hour cutting and marinating stuff, Mr. Fatale spends a few minutes turning food on the grill, and everyone compliments HIM on the great dinner!
        Sheesh!

        • Pinkham’s Law

          That’s . . . that’s not BBQing. That’s grilling.

          • kaw143

            No, grilling is what that heartless Megyn Kelley does to that nice Trump person when she gets to bleeding from her wherevers.

      • bookish

        I don’t think Chelsea allows that anymore.

      • starfanglednut

        He’s vegan now. So favorite quinoa tempeh salad with avocado and arugula recipe.

    • natoslug

      “First Ladydude Clinton, what’s your favorite roofie dose, and why?”

      • Msmlg1979

        Ahhhh..First Ladydude. I like it!

  • Helena Handbag

    I can’t commit to a candidate until I have more information on their pet(s). The FCOTUS and/or FDOTUS is an important issue people and not to be taken lightly.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      First Dog platform: More milk bones, more fetching.

      First Cat platform: High quality litterboxes, First Dog stays the hell away from my water dish.

      • Anarchy Pony

        First cat platform: free feeding always! With wet stuff on top!

      • therblig

        access to medical catnip

      • Thurman Munster IV

        Keep the milk bones away from that batch iCarly.

    • sw19womble

      First Goldfish platform: more little plastic castl…..wait, what was the question? Oh, hi there, have we met? etc…

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        Ceramic castle or GTFO
        Plastic breeds mold

      • kaw143

        First Sea Monkey Platform: Die in Two Days.

    • kaw143

      You never know when the first family might have a VERY BAD puppy who makes doodie in the Lincoln Bedroom when no one’s looking.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    I find the current FLOTUS very “relatable.” Even though there is zero chance I will ever meet her in person, she seems very nice and as near as I can tell from a distance of 300 miles seems like a wonderful mother.

  • Helena Handbag

    C’mon, give these kids a bit of a break. For many, it’s their first Presidential election. They are just a little overenthusiastic.

    • Anarchy Pony

      God knows it was a bit like that in 08 for bamz.

      • Rotisserie Teal

        And the Deaniacs of 04 as well.

    • Pecker Rider of Pern

      Speaking of over-enthusiasm, I’ll never forget seeing a meme shared on FB proclaiming that “The Human Light in Bernie touches the Human Light in me!” I mean, I’m voting for the guy, but it’s not like I keep some huge shrine to him. Not an unreasonably huge shrine, that is.

      • Spotts1701

        It only takes up one wall, right? Because two walls is crazy bananapants.

        • sw19womble

          How far along both walls still constitutes just “a corner”?

          Asking for a friend.

          • Anarchy Pony

            Can’t be more than 30% of each wall.

        • Zippy

          One Yoooge wall- keeps the Messicans out, also too

      • Anarchy Pony

        Yeesh. You almost suspect crap like that of being a kind of smear job. “Hey look how creepy bernie supporters are!”

      • OrdinaryJoe

        You know how it is with these really charismatic populist jewish politicians types. They get people all worked up and talking about things in that way.

        • natoslug

          The minute he starts screaming at a fig tree, that’s it, I’m switching messiahs.

          • Zippy

            God hates figs

          • Anarchy Pony

            Well, he hates fig trees. For not bearing figs. When they aren’t in season. Because he’s a loonie.

          • badphairy

            This exchange is why I come here.

      • badphairy

        A vase, some tasteful flowers, coupla sticks of incense, a satsuma, as ya do.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Overenthusiastic libs tend to lead to swiftly dislillusioned libs as the candidate they deified learns they have to work with “the enemy” in order to get stuff done.
      For example: how many lefties have you heard lament how Bamz was not left enough?

      • bobbert

        Let’s be careful. I have occasionally mentioned that Barry B wasn’t as left as I would have liked. But I knew this going in. Anybody who thought he was a crazed liberal wasn’t listening to what he actually said.

        I happily voted for him twice because he was a substantial improvement over his predecessor Cheney.

    • starfanglednut

      I hear you, but there’s an undercurrent of misogyny there that isn’t explained by an excess of enthusiasm as much as douchbaggery.

  • 451 Byrnes

    Usually I am one for high snark. But I was recently (about 4 months ago) privileged enough to actually meet Mrs Obama; she is a class act that we do not deserve. She is truly a First Lady.

    • Lady Bug

      Lucky you! :)

    • YourMom

      She’s lovely in person… very warm and approachable. And she puts up with a lot of silly stuff from everyone.

      • Lady Bug

        I think one area where me and wingnuts (my new punk band) agree on is that we don’t deserve Michelle or her husband-except were coming at it from obviously different reasons. She truly seems like an amazing woman and she’s a great first lady-the fact that she’s the first African-American first lady and has had to deal with a decade of idiotic, racist attacks against her & her family-is just that more amazing.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      My envy of you is exceeded only by my jealousy.

      • Mr Corrections
      • 451 Byrnes

        Please do not be jealous, but do go out of your way to meet her if you ever get near the opportunity. You will not be sorry you did.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          I’d love to meet her…I don’t think there’s any way she could not exceed my expectations, which are pretty damn high to begin with.

          Sorry, Hillary, but she’s the classiest first lady since Jackie.

    • julienne58

      No kidding. You can bet that if she hadn’t met Barry, she would have been kicking major ass on her own.

  • Ambignostic

    Anybody who tells you what average Americans find relatable is usually operating with a sample size of 1.

    • Anarchy Pony

      Or the incredibly diverse demographic of their friends.

      • Ambignostic

        Occasionally a cab driver.

        • Anarchy Pony

          “Statistical outlier”

        • Zippy

          Tom the Moustache libul!!1!

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Wake up sheeple. Why isn’t the lame stream media looking into the fact that if Trumpy wins, the woman who sleeps a heart beat away from the Presindent will not be a natural born citizen!!!!!! We need to know what other things about his wife are not the natural things she was born with.

    • Anarchy Pony

      We don’t know what devious influence he may be getting from… Out Of State!

    • Zippy

      the daughter also too

      IYKWIM

    • Jukesgrrl

      I’ve heard she’s a Russkie. Where’s Joe McCarthy when you need him?

      • Mr Corrections

        Hell, I’m still waiting for one of the wingnuts to realise that the Islamaphobe nutcase they want to elect once built a casino in the shape of the Taj Mahal – the most famous piece of Islamic architecture in the world (it’s not just a mosque, though: it’s mainly a tomb – what a classy theme for a casino!)

      • OrdinaryJoe

        Moscow Melania in the White House !!!!

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        In her defense, no Murrican wants that job

    • badphairy

      Getting immigrants to the dirty work, yet again.

  • Hemp Dogbane

    I prefer to analyze the First Brother candidates, or perhaps just read Paglia.

  • beatbort

    Uh, Michael, you are not helping Bernie. At all. I mean, if that’s your intention.

  • JN West

    I will gladly vote for whomever the Democratic nominee turns out to be, but I’ve become highly annoyed with Bernie Sanders and his supporters. This article is a great example of why. Ever since Sanders implicated Planned Parenthood and the Human Rights Campaign as part of the “establishment” I’ve come to realize that Bernie is still running as an independent. He’s turned his righteous anger running against the billionaire oligarchs against the Democratic base as well. That is a losing strategy. Turning his supporters against the Democratic Party, will hurt any other Democrats on the ballot. There is a potential that Bernie supporters will simply vote for him and no other Democratic candidate because they are part of the establishment. As a a result,if wins the Presidency he won’t be able to get anything done with a Republican controlled congress. This irrational anti-establishment generalization is a losing strategy long term, but Sanders and his supporters are too caught up in their own egos they can no longer see the forest for the trees.

    • Derpina Assdefender

      But…PP ARE part of the establishment? Let’s not forget that they are a politically powerful organization with a significant lobbying presence. I don’t think you can call PP something else than being part of the establishment, which was the point Sanders seemed to be making.

      • Mr Corrections

        I don’t think it was a helpful thing to say, and there’s no reason to try to spin that statement to be acceptable. PP is doing only good, and implying that they’re not worthy of being defended because they aren’t radical enough is frigging grotesque.

        • Derpina Assdefender

          He was answering to the endorsement of Clinton by PP. Bernie is 100% for reproductive rights and he stands behind PP.

          • Mr Corrections

            Re-read what I wrote, please. I never said anything about his support for reproductive rights.

          • Derpina Assdefender

            He NEVER said they weren’t worthy of being defended. You are the one who doesn’t understand the point Bernie was making. He was critical to the endorsement of HRC by PP considering her liability is close to 0%.

          • Mr Corrections

            I said he implied it, which is exactly what he did – and at a time when they are under attack as never before. PP has every right to decide to support a candidate who more strongly supports them, and Sanders has shown that they were entirely correct in their assessment of him.

      • Msmlg1979

        In my opinion, they need a much more significant lobbying presence since they are trying to keep women’s healthcare and reproductive rights from being dragged back to the middle ages. More power to them!

        • Derpina Assdefender

          PP is a great organisation, but let’s not pretend that their lobbying arm is in not in bed with the Democratic party.

          • Mr Corrections

            Let’s not pretend it IS, either.

          • Derpina Assdefender

            What do you mean? They are clearly part of the Dem establishment. Also something that isn’t talked about much, PP has a dirty habit of referring patients to clinics within their system even if there are independent clinics nearby that’s closer to the patient. That’s prioritizing their own business over a woman’s medical needs. They are a great organisation but please…you are kidding yourself if you doubt they’re a big business/part of the establishment.

          • Mr Corrections

            OK sorry that you can’t admit your candidate isn’t perfect. Not my problem, but yours.

          • Derpina Assdefender

            My candidate? I can’t vote on any candidate in the US nor do I agree with Bernie on everything. He was SPOT ON about PP though. It’s okay, you don’t need to embrace EVERYTHING the Dem/Clinton have in store for us. Just as I can be critical of Bernie’s policy on Israel.

          • Mr Corrections

            OK, he was spot on about them preferring a candidate who wouldn’t throw them under a bus for political gain. Weird how they would support that candidate instead of him!

          • Msmlg1979

            Well, PP and Republicans would certainly make for strange bedfellows.

          • Jukesgrrl

            However, back in the day, Republican women (who believed the poorz should be taught family planning) were the financial mainstay of PP. Women like Sarah Mellon, mother of Richard Mellon Scaife, the Pittsburgh billionaire who funded the endless investigation into the death of Vince Foster because it’s so fun to torture Clintons. She was in league with women whose names were Rockefeller, Bruce, and even Bush. It was the introduction of evangelicals into the GOP that brought an end to Republican participation in the organization.

          • Derpina Assdefender

            Yep. Let’s also not forget that HCR, which JN West mentioned in his OP were explicitly against gay marriage until it became politically viable. Just like Hillary Clinton. I see a pattern here.

          • Mr Corrections

            I can’t even follow your logical contortions any more. What the hell point are you even trying to make?

          • Derpina Assdefender

            The point to be made is that Hillary Clinton flip flops regularly. You can either continue to derail this thread with your nonsense, or you can stop here and spare yourself some time which can be better used somewhere else.

          • Mr Corrections

            What does that have to do with Sanders bad-mouthing PP?

          • Derpina Assdefender

            Because that is what Sanders was trying to say when criticizing their endorsement of Hillary Clinton? Just stop already, this isn’t getting anywhere.

          • Mr Corrections

            OK, sorry that you can’t explain what the hell you’re talking about, and how it excuses the disgraceful thing that Sanders said. Better like with your apologism next time!

          • Msmlg1979

            I look forward to the day when family planning is accepted as a necessary, common sense practice by everyone. That’s the way it should be.

          • Toomush_Infer

            Hmmm….and why is that, again?…

  • Derpina Assdefender

    Some of the Bernie supporters take things a little too far. I can’t blame them though.

    • Toomush_Infer

      Well, they’ve changed my mind and they can just piss off…

  • natoslug

    Most of his supporters go to far, but I do enjoy Bernie’s rallies.
    https://youtu.be/Zjz16xjeBAA

    • Lady Bug

      Besides, whoever heard of a Jewish Messiah anyways?! ;)

  • Zippy
    • Count Awesome

      I had to double check that this wasn’t “The Onion”/

    • Mr Corrections

      I ain’t think that’s a real site, bro

      • Vienna Woods

        Yeah, pretty sure:
        “Do you have a problem with self-rape? Are you looking to get off the Devil’s playground? Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin can help! Praise Fappy!”

        • Mr Corrections

          It seems to be assembled out of bits of other sites by a bot. Either that, or coherent parody is now dead.

      • Zippy

        Ya gotta admit, it would be pretty Yoooge funny if it was…

        • Mr Corrections

          That is no lie.

          • Zippy

            I’ve never seen that site before, but it’s definitely more entertaining than National Report

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Well, Sarah is going to be pissed.

      Also, Joe Arpaio is older than the Bern.

    • Toomush_Infer

      So, his candidacy was a joke, after all…

    • Takoma DC

      That’s crazy.

    • kaw143

      Ah, more of that not-satire this satirical mommyblog is always mommyblogging about. Seriously, people who don’t get what humor is supposed to be: just, stop.

  • Count Awesome

    I don’t get it. Is this guy playing “kill-bang-marry” with the candidates spouses?

    • Mahousu

      Even worse, he’s losing.

      • Count Awesome

        So he’s the “kill” option in that game.

    • Jay Vaughn

      It’s fuck Michelle, marry Michelle, and elect Hillary.
      Electing someone president is like killing them real slow.

  • Jukesgrrl

    My decidedly middle-class mother, nearing ninety and a lifelong Roosevelt-lover, has always held the quaint notion that we should elect “our betters” to high public office. People who have distinguished educations and Know How to Act. She has been a Sanders supporter since before he announced (universal health care! strong Social Security!!), but every time she sees a photo of Jane O’Meara Sanders she says, “Oh my! WHEN is that woman going to get a decent hairdresser? And those CLOTHES!!” She has endless esteem for Michelle Obama and her lovely daughters (who Know How to Dress as well as Act) and wishes Mrs. Sanders would get a clue from them. She managed to get over Bernie not being married to the mother of his son (tut tut, “It was the sixties, I guess”) but the unruly hair on husband AND wife is almost too much.

  • Mr Corrections

    • Steverino247

      Said no one ever.

      • Mr Corrections

        No Bernie said it. You can see his signature right there.

        • Takoma DC

          It must be true!

        • Steverino247

          Because you put it there?

          • Mr Corrections

            No I didn’t, Bernie did. It’s Bernie’s signature.

          • Steverino247

            Then I’m compelled to ask, “Source please?” This means, where did you find that in any Sanders webposting, advertising, etc.

          • Mr Corrections

            OMG can’t you see the signature. It’s amazing that you think that Bernie isn’t claiming he is going to become the Sun.

          • Steverino247

            You’re still not funny.

          • Mr Corrections

            So what? What’s funny about the stars getting eaten by a giant mechanical wolf? Please try to be serious about this very real threat, that Bernie is working to prevent.

          • Steverino247

            No, I think income inequality is a very real threat, just to name one real thing Mr. Sanders is trying to deal with. Snipers like you are a dime a dozen. “Yes, let’s point and laugh at the man who’s really trying to accomplish something.”

          • Mr Corrections

            I can’t believe you figured out that “giant mechanical wolf” was code for “Sanders is a bad person and let’s keep everyone poor forever”. What gave it away?

          • Steverino247

            Still a troll, too.

          • Jay Vaughn

            He ain’t a troll; you ain’t funny.

          • Steverino247

            Who asked you?

      • Frank Underboob

        It’s text on a picture with a name even, OF COURSE IT’S TRUE!

  • Mr Corrections

    ALSO TOO, this just might be my favourite image on the internet right now, and I can’t quite believe I didn’t post it earlier:

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      That’s rich! As my old Isfahani grandmother used to say.

  • proudgrampa

    I’m sorry. Mr Sainato, that was the most pretentious, pseudo-intellectual crap I’ve ever read.

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      So you never read my crap, then?

      • proudgrampa

        Well, at least your crap isn’t pretentious.

        • Vecciojohn LLC

          I am famous for my straightforward, man of the people demeanor and utter lack of affectation; I confess it though I seem to, as it were, blow my own cor anglais. You are entirely too kind, my old boon-companion, of course, but then, as Disraeli once said . . . .

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            We like your crap.
            Wait.
            We like your boon anglais blowing.
            Better.

          • Vecciojohn LLC

            You go to war with the cor anglais you have, even if it’s crap.

          • proudgrampa

            Veccio and Enfant, thanks for making my week! It’s been kind of a grim one for me, and your comments (which are never allowed) made me laugh. A lot.

          • Vecciojohn LLC

            If I were allowed to respond to a comment, which, I understand, is not allowed, I would wish you serenity and ask blessings upon you.

    • Enfant Terrible

      Hey, if you want pretentious and pseudo-intellectual, visit my blog!

      Oh wait, I don’t have a blog.

      • Amy!

        Pretend you do ….

        • bobbert

          Now, that’s pretentious.

  • Joe Beese

    Looks like Donald will have difficulty wrapping the flag around his skipping the debate.

    <>

    http://linkis.com/www.cnn.com/2016/01/MzwOM

    I still think it’s a smart play though.

    Anyone who would conclude “Why this fellow is touchy narcissist completely lacking a presidential temperament!” has long since done so. Likewise, anyone who would conclude “That Donald sure knows where to tell those highfalutin’ media types where to get off!” And the polls tell us that there are more of the latter than the former. So Trump is merely dancing with those what brung him.

    RedState – which now functions solely as an anti-Trump organ – wants to believe that skipping this particular debate will have some special (and hopefully terrible) cost:

    <>

    (Careful there, boys! People might mistake you for snotty liberals who hate the Real Americans in flyover country!)

    But is it conceivable that any Iowa voter’s last minute decision on Cruz vs Trump could really come down to which one showed up for the sixth debate?

    • Count Awesome

      Trump would rather have the Iowa voters kiss his cock ring.

      • Vecciojohn LLC

        Or the one in the middle of his ass.*

        * Hat-tip, Tony Soprano.

      • Takoma DC

        But it’s so very teeny.

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      Why aren’t these organizations getting any of the attention Trump’s getting?

      Oh, yeah, that’s right.

      https://www.facebook.com/KimKardashian/

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      You mean Trump never contacted these guys to let them know ahead of time he planned to do a fund raiser for them and it all sounded like a political stunt to them from the very people who keep repeatedly voting down vet bennies?
      YOU DONT SAY

  • Count Awesome

    If the point of this guys article is to cast ones vote for your favorite spouse of the candidates, I’d rather just vote for Bill Clinton.

    • Vecciojohn LLC

      Works the other way round with the Clintons, too. I guess.

      Hmm. Chelsea is now over 35 . . .

  • Jenny

    So republicans can relate to Mr. and Mrs. Sanders because…white? Is there something else they might find in common with the self proclaimed socialist community organizers?

    • Count Awesome

      Children out of wedlock?

      • Jenny

        Oh I know! Maybe living some where as cold as Vermont. Probably that too. Maybe even walking to work instead of driving?

        • Count Awesome

          He could make inroads in the south. I had a child out of wedlock may be just as effective as Trump stating he’d bang Ivanka.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Works for Barstool!

          • Takoma DC

            Or Hillary switching accents.

        • Takoma DC

          Composting!

  • Harlan Retweeted

    Tulsi Gabbard ‏@TulsiGabbard Jan 25

    .@BernieSanders Talks abt differences between his record & @hillaryclinton, starting with his vote against the war in Iraq #demtownhall

  • Count Awesome

    Will Mr Sainato channel Mr.Blackwell via Oiuja board and then write a blog with the awful poetry Blackwell spouted declaring who we should vote for?

  • Joe Beese
    • Count Awesome

      It looks like there will be several “night of the long knives” going forward. The first night will get rid of Cruz and his only response will be “et tu everyone?”.

      • Joe Beese

        I was going to put “Night of the Long Knives” here, naturally, but I prefer this song. It has a merrier vibe, appropriate to thoughts of Cruz getting shivved by his fellow low-lifes. (And that sustained G at the climax is just insane!)

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncXI5zkTDio

        • Count Awesome

          Great song and good choice for Cruz predicament.
          I offer this song for Hillary or Bernie to rally the troops (sorry it’s almost ten minutes long, but I firmly believe in the idea of
          “In love and gear in jate and tears/Sit down next to me”)

        • Count Awesome

          Quicker album version for aforementioned song:

          https://youtu.be/LBQ5NzFrqPs

    • dead_elvis

      Isn’t nearly all Republican internecine conflict motivated by butthurt more than sincerely held, conflicting beliefs? Or maybe it’s sincere butthurt… crap, they all make my head have butthurt.

      Is exposure to Trump similar to lead poisoning, in that the damage is permanent?

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Couldn’t happen to a nicer bunch of guys. For serious

    • jmhm

      The question is, though, what is profit. Mike Huckabee isn’t running to win, he’s running so he’s enough of a factor that the wingnit welfare keeps rolling in.

      And if it takes kneecapping Cruz to convince donors and campaigns that it’s better to have him inside the tent pissing out, well, it’s not as if he wouldn’t have done it out of spite anyway.

  • Ben Trumble

    Poor Mr Sainato’s inability to write not withstanding, one wonders what saintly Sainato thinks of that awful Mrs. Roosevelt? That GAWD the WPA had all those talented predigital, prephotoshoppe photogs to stage archival jpegs of Eleanor with those Sanders voters in the California migrants camps.

    • Count Awesome

      “She looks too dike-y”-Mr. Sainato.

  • Enfant Terrible

    The past three first ladies; Michelle Obama, Laura Bush, and Hillary Clinton
    all share a common insincere, yet polished, demeanor inherent with an
    affluent lifestyle. Senator Bernie Sanders’ wife, Jane O’Meara Sanders,
    provides an authentic alternative to this status quo.

    Reminds me of something…

    “But she does have a respectable Republican cloth coat”

    Don’t yell at me – it’s Michael Sainato’s logic.

    • Joe Beese

      Going waaay back with that reference. Don’t know if the young ‘uns will get it.

      Got me curious though. Turns out Pat wasn’t too shabby in her day.

      • Takoma DC

        She has a Mommy Dearest quality.

        • cousin itt

          I’m guessing that her scalp must have been really itchy from all those chemicals.

          • kaw143

            And her crotch was really itchy because of all of the —

            Uh, I’ll show myself out.

          • Frank Underboob

            …bugs?

      • proudgrampa

        I always felt sorry for Pat Nixon. She was married to such an asshole.

      • Frank Underboob

        Not bad. That’s a very Candice Bergen/Murphy Brown look she’s got going there.

  • Shibusa

    Odd. I’ve never noticed a place on the ballot for a first lady before.

  • kaydenpat

    I love Senator Sanders but his supporters are meh. They really need to chill.

  • Steverino247

    I prefer to hear Robert Reich on Bernie Sanders than some bozo on Huffington Post.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      I prefer to hear Bernie on Bernie Sanders, myself. These web warrior yahoos remind me more of a buncha MRA douches who are stomping for him attempting to split the party based on ideology over cohesion (not that they are, but dear lord, why are so many of them sexist? For reals, I get the mails and I am like…dude, do I want to be a part of this?). Most liberals are too smart for that- whomever wins the nod, we’re going D. But if enough younger folk get all pissy that their card didn’t make it, that could be bad.

      • Mr Corrections

        One of the Hillary-is-a-Republican pro-Bernie dweebs who showed up here the other day was an ex-Ron Paul supporter, which given their rhetoric is really no surprise at all.

        • Anarchy Pony

          How the hell can a paultard turn into a bernie supporter? Diametrically opposed worldviews…

          • Mr Corrections

            It is entirely about being self-righteous.

          • SoSezYou

            Yeah, but if you think anarchy would ensue backing Bernie (which it wouldn’t) A Ron Paul idjit would be motivated to go there.

          • Anarchy Pony

            Uh, anarchy libel. Those savages are capitalists first.

          • Mr Corrections

            No actual capitalist would support the gold standard.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            They don’t actually support it. They just want everyone else to support it so they can rake even more sweet money in. It is a constant scam from one end to the other in the Randian world

          • Anarchy Pony

            No “intelligent” capitalist.

          • Left Coast Tom

            …Ralph Nader became a Paultard. Despite the fact that Nader gave us our modern consumer protection laws, and the Pauls first goal would be to dump Nader’s major accomplishment.

          • jmhm

            Ralph Nader has eaten a bit too much tuna.

          • fredfnord

            Don’t be silly. The ‘worldview’ in question is ‘fuck the establishment’, and thus it’s entirely self-consistent. It’s admittedly only held by spoiled white (mostly) men, but as long as you believe in literally nothing else, Paul to Sanders is an easy transition.

          • Mr Corrections

            This is exactly correct.

      • Ahhhh, I get it. Sexist pieces of shit are backing Bernie for the same reason racist pieces of shit backed Hillary in 2008.

        • Jen_Baker_VA

          Precisely. They are attempting to influence the Democrats like they do the Republicans.
          I say don’t let em. In the end, they’re probably voting R anyway.

      • Steverino247

        They’ll get over it. Recall the PUMA movement when Mrs. Clinton started losing to Mr. Obama in 2008. Same behavior exactly.

  • Jennifer R

    People like the idjit being written about make me ashamed to slightly prefer sanders.

  • Michael Sainato is, I bet, a false flag. No actual left-wing liberal / social-democrat would actually make the sexist move of making the candidate’s wife’s personality an issue. Would they?

    • SoSezYou

      If you listen to some of the rants of the more fervent Bernie fans, you wouldn’t that was far from their realm of thought. Right now, at least on the internet, Bernie supporters are his worse enemy….but then again I hear quite a few less than liberal minded independents are working real hard less for Bernie and more against Clinton….trying to influence the primaries…which is kind of silly considering the Democratic Primaries aren’t as susceptible to tea party style antics.

      Also, you may want to dump using Alex Jones wordisms such as False Flag. They work more against your opinion than support.

    • kaw143

      Something something cookies something.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      That is what I was thinking.

    • Dorothy Nelson

      Dude have you SEEN the Bernie Bros cavorting in their own neo-Libertarian, He-Man Woman Haters Club poop over at DU? The HRC hate couldn’t be more sexist and insulting if it came from the diseased finger-stumps of an inbred Trumpeter.

  • No mention of what a great First Lady Bill Clinton will make?

  • Manhattan123

    Bernie actually seems like an okay guy, a bit humorless and not exactly sporting a sparkling personality – but jeezus, an awful lot of his supporters are insufferable assholes.

    • haugenpaul

      and the same can be said for every candidate…in every election, past, present and future. Hillary supporters can be smug assholes. Perhaps even insufferable. It’s called…the internet. yeesh

      • Mr Corrections

        It’s true that there’s no patent on asshole supporters – there are individual Hillary supporters just as annoying. But you can’t tell me there’s not a glut of obnoxious Sanders supporters, because they’re everywhere.

        • Mike!

          Even right behind you!!! Bwahahahaha!

          (sorry)

        • fredfnord

          People who actually believe in something often seem pretty obnoxious to those who believe in something else, or, worse, believe in nothing at all.

          I think that you’re right, but it’s only because there are fewer Clinton ‘believers’, most of her supporters doing so for pragmatic reasons. And, just to make sure I’m understood, I’m not saying that’s bad, I’m just saying that judging people for actually believing (in this case) that we can actually make a better country than we have now could come off as a bit petty.

          • Mr Corrections

            That’s not it – I don’t care if someone supports Sanders or Clinton, or neither or both for that matter. What I dislike is that fraction of his supporters that insist you are a paid shill if you dare question a single thing he says or does, or dare to not hate Hillary Clinton with every fibre of your being for her imaginary thoughtcrimes. That’s got nothing to do with being progressive, and everything to do with being a zealot, which is always gross.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Because they are not so much Bernie supporters as they are Clinton haters.

          • Mr Corrections

            Bingo.
            And if you chase down why, it inevitably comes down to the fake stories that Murdoch and the Kochs paid fake journalist Peter Schweizer to create.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Precisely :) I myself am a Bernie supporter but erm. I guess not an ardent one or something? Or maybe I am just one of those people who don’t let my hates rule me. (not that I hate Mrs. C. She is badass and kickass, there are just things I do not agree with her upon. However, should she get the nod, my vote won’t be sitting at home or going 3rd party, dig. Shit be too real for that kind of stupid).

          • Mr Corrections

            Right, according to current polling around three-quarters of the Democrat base would be happy if Hillz was chosen, and roughly the same amount if Sanders wins. Obviously not the same ~75%, but clearly the bulk of Democrat voters are going to support whichever candidate wins.

            What is objectionable are those people who claim they’re not going to vote at all if their chosen candidate doesn’t win. That’s not acceptable with the Republicans as they are right now – the idea of them winning should be terrifying to any sane person.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Agreed.
            It is like the sportsball. You can have a huge friggin crush on that star throwing guy all you want, but ya don’t give away the whole ball game because he isn’t playing that night.
            I am all proud that I made a sportsball metaphore, so pretend it makes all sorts of wise and sage sense.

          • Mr Corrections

            In my mind you are some sort of venerable oracle now.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            I couldn’t think of the word quarter back. meh, 230 in the am.

          • Mr Corrections

            Oh I just found the MediaMatters rap sheet on Peter Schweizer:
            http://mediamatters.org/research/2015/04/30/twenty-plus-errors-fabrications-and-distortions/203480

            fuck me that guy is a sold-out piece of shit.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Remember how the “biased” media only tells the leftist stories or whatever? And then all conservative entertainers (they are not journalists, fuck them) decided to spin everything hardcore right and no one seemed to have a problem with their bias for some odd reason?
            Same as it ever was. May these fucknutters rot somewhere for all eternity for what they are trying to do to my country.

          • Major_Major_Major

            It works for pitchers in baseball also, too.

          • Frank Underboob

            Is that better than being a venerial oracle?

          • Mr Corrections

            not necessarily!

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            less itchy, though

          • Frank Underboob

            I get a very strong vibe that a lot of people who want vote for Sanders wouldn’t be voting at all if someone like him wasn’t running. Basically the same disenchanted demographic that turned up out of nowhere to vote for Obama in ’08.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Then they need to understand they are part of the problem. If the Republicans get the house, and keep the senate/lil house, we are truly fucked so many ways I doubt we’d dig ourselves out in our lifetime.

          • Mr Corrections

            It’s taken us this long to undo only part of the damage from Nixon through to Reagan.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            PBS needs to do that series, badly.

          • Frank Underboob

            I’ve tried explaining to non-voters that a vote for the lesser evil is still worthwhile, but it’s like talking to a brick wall. And it’s not like I can even say that Clinton is a good candidate – or at least not if if want to keep down my last meal – just that she’s significantly less evil than Adolf Trump or Ayatollah Cruz. :/

          • Vienna Woods

            I’ve had to deal with some assholes here in Canadia who think that going to the polling station, taking their ballot, and then handing it back and saying “I decline to vote” is a viable alternative. That it sends a message to the vile (AOT,K, they think) politicians. Yeah, douches, the message is that you are A idiot who doesn’t want to have a voice in deciding who makes the decisions. Bra-fucking-vo.

          • akita96th

            That is why we must at least get the house…So we can veto crazy republican legislation…Those fkrs are batshit crazy.

          • Jay Vaughn

            Just straight up women haters. I think almost all of his assholes are just glad they have a man to vote for.

          • Steverino247

            If you vote for someone based on gender, skin color, height or any similar feature, you’re an idiot.

          • jmhm

            By this logic, the evangelical crusaders who are trying to force the rest of us into paying for their regressive theocracy are kind of admirable for their spectacular contempt for the rest of us. Because it clearly proves they’re the true believers and they care, and the rest of us are really kind of corrupt, wouldn’t you say?

            Pragmatism is the desire to act in a way which is most likely to achieve a desired outcome. And yes, when I vote it will be, among other reasons, so my daughter’s future and the world she lives in do not get handed over by the Republicans and their shiny new Justices to crazy people in exchange for their votes.

            So I’m afraid any argument that both they, and the people who think that risk is not worth considering, should be handed a get out of asshole free card is… not worth much consideration. JMO.

          • ADELANTE CON CLINTONS

            talk about smug assholes….

      • Goposaur

        I went to the 2008 rules committee at the Wardman Park just for the spectacle – I was not disappointed.

        EJ Dionne saw my wife reading “Atonement”, tapped her shoulder and said she had the right idea. I was channelling HST, wandering about the lobby with a tumbler of bourbon, enjoying the thunderstorm both outside and in.

        • ADELANTE CON CLINTONS

          talk about smug assholes…

      • Lara

        The election where a woman had a chance at the presidency, I would argue, have not been the same as every other election ever. The combination of the Internet and misogyny together is especially recently, relatively speaking, and definitely new in comparison.

    • Same thing could be said for Jesus Christ.

      • bobbert

        If he existed.

        • Armchair Designer

          One doesn’t need to exist for realz to have a following, cf : Duck Dynasty.

          • akita96th

            The unholy army of Duck fuckers…

    • Frank Underboob

      Unlike Trumps’ & Cruze’s, you mean?

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        no no, ALL their supporters are insufferable assholes.

        • Frank Underboob

          Exactly my point.

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Is why I upfisted you ^.^

        • akita96th

          I can suffer Bernies assholes better than I can the Clown Car tour road show….or Hillarys army of Debbie Wassermans assoHolics….So it is all a matter of picking your favorite brand of assholieness…

      • Manhattan123

        No, but the article was abut a Bernie supporter?

        • Frank Underboob

          My point being that your comment is just as true about every other politician on earth too.

  • Sigh. Maybe all of us legal citizens of voting age in America should just commit suicide and do the world a favor. Clearly we’re none of us well suited for democracy anymore.

    i don’t mean this in a commenting policy violating way, I just mean as a voluntary, bleak, fuck-us-we’re-all-awful kind of “joke”. I’m a Sanders dudebro (I guess, though I would argue with the “bro” nomenclature) and Clinton bugs me on policy (drug/Mideast war mostly) issues but, man. I don’t care about spouses or kids or ..

    Okay wait! Instead of collective suicide like that one group in Gravity’s Rainbow, maybe we just stop writing bullshit “think” pieces about “things” “we” “don’t” “know” “about”?

    No, that’s no good, either. Cuz then what would I read online?

    Ah, fuck it, dudebros – let’s go bowling.

    Wait, what?

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Don’t fret, we’re still suited for democracy. Believe it or not, this is how democracy actually works.
      It ain’t pretty, it often ain’t peaceful, but it all turns out ok in the end. (course, that happy ending may not be until after we are dead and buried, but details, details)

    • Robyn Ryan

      I feel your pain.

  • Wee Mousie

    This is the problem. A supporter gets to pick his candidate, but a candidate doesn’t get to pick his supporters.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      some people are just naturally stupid assholes.

  • Frank Underboob

    Speaking as a Bernie supporter myself, I have one thing to say to Mr. Sainato:
    YOU AREN’T HELPING! KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF!
    Not only only is Michelle Obama a truly amazing woman, she’s also the hottest ever First Lady.

    • stoplyin2217

      stop

      • Frank Underboob

        Stop what?

        • rosenbomb

          I say keep goin’

    • LesBontemps

      Well, Jackie K was no slouch in the hotness department.

      • Dorothy Nelson

        Yeah but those Michelle biceps tho

        • ADELANTE CON CLINTONS

          As if dudes give a fizzle ’bout arms.

      • Frank Underboob

        Good point. Although she would’ve been riddled with VD, like her husband.

      • Takoma DC

        Have you ever heard her voice?

  • motmelere

    If you need context, this is an insecure polished Michelle getting burned by Commander-in-Daddy on how to make baby stop crying.

    • Joe Beese

      MY GOD HE’S MUSLIMIZING THAT DEFENSELESS BABY!

  • stoplyin2217

    Hillary grew up middle class and went to public school but that doesn’t stop you guys from calling her privileged, etc. Spare us the outrage because he lumped Michelle in the same category.

    • norah mackenzie

      michelle Obama grew up in Chicago in a one bedroom apt – she worked and studied and should be commended not dissed

      • stoplyin2217

        Hillary should not be dissed either but the left does it all the time. So sick of it.

    • Takoma DC

      Who are “you guys”?

      Hillary Clinton is extremely intelligent and hard-working.

      But have you forgotten the vile comments she and those employed by her working her ’08 campaign made about Barack?

      I wonder why President Obama or the First Lady have not come out in support of Mrs.Clinton?

      • Mr Corrections

        Can you quote one of these “vile comments” she made?

        • Takoma DC
          • Mr Corrections

            You specifically claimed that she personally made vile comments. Can you quote one of them please?

          • Takoma DC

            She made a racially veiled statement comparing Obama’s rhetoric to MLK, Jr but that it took LBJ to pass the Civil Right’s Act. HRC also approved a campaign mailer which included a photograph of Barack wearing traditiinal Indonesian clothes attending a madrassa. She refused to give a concession speech. She supported surrogate Ferraro’s comments that Obama got into Yale due to Affirmative Action and had it easier than his white counterparts.

            When I have the time I’ll post links to reputable sources. I’m sure your eager to learn, or be reminded of how she ran her ’08 campaign.

          • Mr Corrections

            So no.

          • Takoma DC

            If you don’t find Clinton’s racially veiled remarks, her approval to use the madrassa photo, not conceding to Obama offensive that’s your prerogative.

          • Mr Corrections

            So no (slight reprise). Still no idea why you think this kind of shit is acceptable, but taking a misogynist to task is bad because he supports Sanders. It’s weird and gross, and you should probably spend some time thinking about why you think this is OK.

          • Takoma DC

            When did I ever say misogyny acceptable? You have to chose your battles wisely. That blogger isn’t worth a few seconds notice. The misogynists to be concerned about are those creating public policy, voting, and voting no on women’s issues.

            I can just imagine where Bill Clinton falls on your misogyny scale.

            I introspect deeply and frequently. I don’t require a virtual dude with an arrogant handle to guide me.

            Enjoy your evening.

          • Mr Corrections

            OK, sorry that you can neither read nor back up your bizarre attempt to blame Clinton for things that never happened. Better luck defending the indefensible next time!

          • Takoma DC

            Yeah bro.

          • Mr Corrections

            You’re quite welcome! I’m always happy to help out the lesser posters!

          • Takoma DC

            Now HRC is indefensible? She has Wall St’s support, 98% of dems in office, etc….but she’s unable to protect herself. You’re her knight in virtual armor?

          • Mr Corrections

            Again, we circle back to your lack of reading comprehension.

          • Takoma DC

            Indefensible: not able to be protected against attack.

            If you meant it in a different way then the way you express yourself isn’t clear.

            But then you’re already aware that I’m a “lesser” commenter.

            It’s interesting you continue to condescend and make personal attacks. Yeah you care about misogyny alright.

          • Mr Corrections

            Yes, it’s almost like I no longer give the tiniest shit what you think because you’re an appalling hypocrite! Weird!

          • stoplyin2217

            It DID take LBJ to pass the Civil Rights Act. That’s not a racist comment about Obama. That’s history. And if you heard the whole comment, she was comparing herself to LBJ, not Obama to MLK.

            You have no proof that she was responsible for Ferraro’s comments, nor did she use that picture in a fundraising letter.

            What about the lie his campaign started that Bill is a racist? And they are trying to do it again, but with Hillary. Note the recent Ta-nahesi Coates article in the Atlantic making that charge about Hillary.

            Enough with the false allegations already.

          • Takoma DC

            I know the comment and know how I and others interpreted it. I never said she wasn’t comparing herself to LBJ – that’s not arrogant? She was also insulting Obama at the same time.

            Clinton mocked Obama’s speeches and his platform just as she’s doing with Sanders.

            You have no proof that Clinton wasn’t relishing Ferraro’s racist comments made on her behalf. Clinton eventually apologized for those racist remarks but it took a long time.

            Bill Clinton also made several comments which in.my opinion, and the opinion of many others which were racist. Bill Clinton’s policies were certainly racist.

            I like and appreciate Coates but don’t agree with him on everything. I don’t agree with his belief thst Clinton is the best choice for Black America. Believe it or not, other black people don’t agree with Coates on that either.

            Clinton and her campaign joyfully used the madrassa photo in a mailer.

            Hillary Clinton will be a very good president but I’m not going to ignore her weaknesses, faults and mistakes.

            What kind of a person refuses to make a concession speech? Perhaps she’s grown and matured a lot since ’08? I hope so but she’s not above reproach.

      • stoplyin2217

        What vile comments?Anybody who asked about his record was attacked.

        • cleos_mom

          In some cases it’s another double standard; it’s such bad form for the girl to not just let the boy win. Ergo, her comments are attacks; her opponent’s are just campaigning.

  • bobbert

    Just because Kaili mentioned him in passing, I would like to register my opinion of one of the most vociferous BernieBros, H.A. Goodman. And that opinion is “Shut the fuck up and listen to yourself once in a while”.

    I read a few of his posts on HuffyPoo, where he apparently holds founders’ stock, because he post several times a week. I stopped after reading him explicitly saying that if Bernie did not get the nomination, he (H.A.) would not vote for Clinton in the general. This is such a stupid idea that I will ignore anything else he has to say, however persuasive it might potentially be.

    That’s all. Just an opinion. I like Bernie’s positions; I expect to vote for him in the Cali primary. I think H.A. Goodman is an idiot. That’s all.

    • Robyn Ryan

      H.A. Goodman is probably a Rove operative.

    • Takoma DC

      Does HuffPo even pay these “writers”? It was my understanding almost anyone could get their stuff on Huffington Post.

  • Armchair Designer

    The Sanders crowd clearly seems to have its fair share of vocal minority asshats, but from anecdotal evidence, I have a feeling Bernie may be doing us the huge-yet-unsexy favor of upcycling a lot of lapsed randroids and other non-Xtians anarcho-types that could otherwise vote for Trump or some other right-wing demagogue.

    I have no idea to which extent the Bernie camp being saddled with drooling dudebros diaper care is planned or accidental, but Hillary fans should ask themselves : would you be willing to do it ? …yeah, I didn’t think so. ;)

    With that said, going after Michelle Obama on the grounds of her being some kind of black-patrician-aloof-heiress is fucking asinine, but I don’t think it’s representative either of Sanders’ views nor of most of his supporters.

    Looking into the dark and sticky corners of the intarwebs, I pretty much guarantee you could find terrible people supporting {pick your own iconic hero}…
    As John Cleese once said : an idea should not be held accountable for those who claim to support it.

    • WampusKat

      Oh come on. These idiots swarm anyone who even whispers Hillary’s name. Let’s not pretend nobody’s noticing. When Paul Krugman and BernieKos feel the need to complain: http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/1/26/1475293/-So-this-is-what-dKos-has-been-reduced-to

      I should also point our that the Paultards are leading the crap show thanks to “Paul curious” Libertarian Glenn Greenwald (check his feed/it’s constant) and don’t even think about “nuh-uh” because I don’t open my mouth unless I can deliver the goods (either about his Libertarian busllshit or his ratfucking): https://twitter.com/ggreenwald/status/677977586492964864

      Yeah, it’s kind of odd that Greenwald has such an interest in Bernie, since according to Glenn Greenwald, socialists drool/Bush rules (and carpet bombing Iraq is better than drones, apparently):
      http://glenngreenwald.blogspot.com/2005/11/reality-of-latin-american-reaction-to.html

      “But that was then…” Nope. Certain “progressives” are going to have to ask themselves if they want to keep up the “progressive” Greenwald charade, because guess what all that “progressive” Ron Paul lovin’ is about to cost Bernie Sanders (and we told ya so) – here’s Ron Paul starring in a white supremacist militia film in “The Jews” feature quite predominantly (watch the “documentary” clip):
      http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/ron-paul-stars-oath-keepers-militia-film-anti-semitic-filmmaker

      And here is Glenn Greenwwald STILL touring college campuses with white power Ron Paul and other Koch-sponsored Neo-Confederates (TEST ME) under the banner of “civil liberties”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70ZUSd43NEk

      They’re going to start whispering pretty soon… and blame it on Hillary (which is why Hillary’s emails are of such importance to the GOP an dthey have much interest in Sid Blumenthal whose son happens to be Max Blumenthal (who was over in Germany chasing down German MPs who told him that Germany is not the place to be hating on “the Jews” no matter how one feels about Netanyahu). We also note that Max and Glenn and Paul are in it up to their ears together: http://www.dialoginternational.com/dialog_international/2015/01/pegida-and-the-peace-demonstrations-anti-americanism-and-anti-semitism.html

      Want to see just how unimpressed the Germans are?
      http://www.dw.com/en/pegida-neo-nazis-and-organized-rage/a-18212964

      So, it behooves us to shut down the shit stirrers and fakers on both sides, does it not? Ohterwise, it’s lose/lose for both camps. How do we know which is which? By their deeds we will know them:)

      Unless, according to certain “progressives,” the end game is this: “Let the Republicans win” (because there aren’t quite enough corpses piled up already to satisfy the Berniebros over at Salon): http://www.dw.com/en/pegida-neo-nazis-and-organized-rage/a-18212964

      In which case, let’s ask the general public what THEY think about that idea. I figure they have a right to know who’s conning them and why (and won’t they be happy to find out that Ralph Nader already done been there and done that back in the aughts: http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/ballot_box/2000/10/ralph_the_leninist.html

      And if that’s not bad enough, here is Ralphie pallin’ around with white power brokers on white supremacist Tom Wood’s show formulating that there “Progressive” – Ron Paul white power “alliance”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-1NSHHX3QA

      Meet Tom Woods: http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/apr/12/christian-fundamentalism-ron-paul-homeschooling

      Decisions, decisions.

      • Armchair Designer

        I think I (mostly) get what you’re saying, but my point is : those idiots are liable to vote, and not only won’t they vote for Hillary in a million years, at least a fraction of them could easily go Trump just to spite her.
        That they are currently rallying (more or less) under #FeelTheBern colors may yield lesser evil results in the general :

        – Hillary gets the nomination, and some of them go for Trump/Cruz, but many just sulk and don’t vote because “this shit is rigged anyway”.

        – Bernie is the running donkey, and more likely than not, they stick with him.

        Either way, that’s probably fewer votes for whichever creepy clown carries the republican idiot ball this year : in a world of generalized suckage, I’d tentatively call it a win-win.

  • Tort Master

    This is a great riff! I’ve missed Kaili.

  • AB316

    I am head over heels for Bernie and the blog by this Sainato fella is some grade-A hot garbage. Much like being a fan of a sports team, just because he’s also a fan does not mean I need to make excuses for this cretin.

    Be better, Bernie supporters.

    • norah mackenzie

      I understand that pple want to vote for Bernie sanders – fair enough but this article by that guy came out in the huffpost dismissing mrs Obama mrs bush and even Hillary Clinton for being the typical first ladies – why it was even written I have no idea – trying to elevate Bernie’s wife at the expense of all 3 remarkable women is not right and totally unfair. trying to erase the first ladies who have come before negates mrs sanders as well

      • MaudeofThunder

        Don’t you know? The only way to admire a woman is by pitting her against other women. It’s the American way!

        • Robyn Ryan

          and women are only extensions of their spouses….

          • Takoma DC

            Just after their Lord’s car.

      • What does any of this have to do with anything? Some guy no one has ever heard of said a thing and so… why do we care?

        • Mr Corrections

          Because we should call out misogyny wherever it appears? How is that even an issue for you?

          • Takoma DC

            There’d be no other articles and many many more articles if eradicating misogyny was Wonkette’s mission.

          • WampusKat

            Keep digging… shall I get you a bigger shovel?

        • Lara

          Nobody said you had to care.

        • cleos_mom

          If you don’t care, why have you stuck around long enough to leave a number of comments? Really, people.

      • Takoma DC

        I don’t believe that was Sainato’s true intention.

        • Lara

          Who said you had to care?

      • blaid droog

        Personally, I don’t think there was anything even remotely remarkable about laura shrub.

        • Takoma DC

          She could wear a hijab like no ther first lady.

  • Dr. Krieger IRL

    Edith Roosevelt was considered a very relatable First Lady as well, but most likely not by modern standards.

    I like Michelle Obama, I admire how active she is and how many causes she’s taken up as First Lady.

  • Jay Vaughn

    This is the only website where Bernie supporters don’t make me reach for my throttler.

  • Robyn Ryan

    Mrs. Sanders ….is “an extension of Bernie ……” derp…

  • Bill Slider

    Oh shit. I always though Ike and Maimi had a typical normal American family. Also, too, Jack and Jackie, Dick and Pat, Ronnie and Nancy. I could go on.

  • greyXstar

    Monumentally stupid stuff to put out there. There’s zero reason to tear down others to make “your side” sound better. Well, unless you’re Republican, I guess.

    However –

    That goes both ways. This wasn’t about exposing asshats on the internet as much as it was an excuse for Kaili to get in some OOH SICK…BURNS in on Bernie.

    I’m sure it wouldn’t take much to find random asshats doing asshattery in the name of Hillary. But why bother even pointing it out? What purpose does it serve? We’re all on the same side here.

    • Mr Corrections

      That guy is not on my side.

      • greyXstar

        Put it this way: What’s the better way of handling stuff like this? Calling out dumbass behavior and moving on, or starting PUMAs vs Obamabots 2.0?

        We criticize conservatives for not learning from history. I’d rather not make the same mistakes.

        • Yeah this site’s whole “find every straw man we can to take down Bernie” mentality is getting pretty old and smells of the same “desperate” (to use Bernie’s word) tactics the Clinton campaign is using. As you rightly asked, what good does this post accomplish other than to try to say “hey look, here’s a Bernie guy and he writes stupid stuff so logically it must follow Bernie is bad bad man!!”?

          • greyXstar

            To be fair, I wouldn’t say it’s the site. There have been times where everyone trashed some of Hillary’s debate answers. I just really don’t get how one rando saying something stupid is even worth the site’s bandwidth.

          • Mr Corrections

            Because it’s funny?

          • Takoma DC

            Well that’s a matter of opinion.

            I don’t believe spouse’s or children (unless they’re in politics themselves) should bebe brought into the equation.

          • Mr Corrections

            Neither does the author of the article? That is kind of the point?

          • Takoma DC

            The matter of opinion I referred to was humor. I usually like Kaili’s writing but imho respondinging to this immature blogger’s shit is just giving him the attention he craves and not worth the time. And I didn’t find the piece funny.

          • Mr Corrections

            Look, I’m not saying that Sanders supporters are completely devoid of humour, but just below one of you is taking me to task because I posted a quote from Bernie saying that a mechanical wolf is going to eat the stars and that guy earnestly wants me to know that Bernie never said that.

          • Takoma DC

            Was he serious? I thought the poster was being sarcastic?

          • Mr Corrections

            I thought so too, at first. Now he’s beginning to worry me.

          • greyXstar

            PUMAs gonna PUMA

          • Mr Corrections

            I seem to recall that we had articles about the PUMAs back in the day.

          • Lara

            If they’re paying for the bandwidth I don’t get why it’s worth anyone’s concern. If people disagree, great, disagree. Obviously the site and the author found a reason to write and publish.

          • Takoma DC

            I have my doubts Sainato is a true supporter of Sanders.

          • Mr Corrections

            Yeah that’s not what is happening here.

          • Takoma DC

            What is happening?

          • Mr Corrections

            What is happening is not “find every straw man we can to take down Bernie”.

          • Takoma DC

            Ok.

            So you believe the impetus for critiquing Sainato’s piece is purely for comedic value?

          • Mr Corrections

            Not at all. I believe we can extract comedy from it. I also believe that many Sanders supporters are incapable of dealing with even the slightest hint of criticism directed at him or anyone who supports him, and… well, here you are.

          • Takoma DC

            I read the article a few days ago. Today I’m surprised to learn it’s a “top” story.

            When first published, I read itit without commenting.

            What does my “being here” indicate? You’re here too.

          • Mr Corrections

            You’re here claiming that the article constitutes an unjust attack on Sanders.

            Meanwhile, just below, you posted an actual unjust attack on Clinton.

            Weird!

          • Takoma DC

            Where? I never said the article was unfair against Sanders. I specifically called out other commenters correlating Sainato’s opinion with those of other Sanders supporters.

            Where did I make an unjust “attack” on Clinton?

          • Mr Corrections
          • Takoma DC

            That’s a link to this page.

            Since you believe this article was meant to highlight misogyny and extract humor from a piss poor piece of commentary by unknown blogger, can you help me to understand the very last paragraph?

          • Mr Corrections

            With an anchor that leads to the appropriate comment.

          • Takoma DC

            I’ll try again.

          • Takoma DC

            How is a fact an attack?

          • Lara

            I don’t get telling someone you don’t pay and you don’t have to read what is worth his or her effort. Obviously the author felt it was worth hers.

          • WampusKat

            Here’s another top story regarding Berniebros treatment of Krugman (top of rec the list): http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/1/26/1475293/-So-this-is-what-dKos-has-been-reduced-to

            THIS is how much everyone has had it with this behavior, including sane Bernie supporters. You’ve also become a running joke on reddit. FYI: yesterday I blocked two people (Hllz and Bern bots who would not take KNOCK IT OFF for an answer). Get it though your heads that we have no wish to look as stupid as the KLown Kar next door. The Paultard method of shouting down people who don’t agree with you 100% at all times is NOT how Democrats behave!

          • Takoma DC

            I’ll be voting for HRC in the election. I sometimes disagree with people on all variety of topics. I’ve been in 3-4 disagreements on Wonkette and I’ve been commenting for 3 yrs or so.

            Thanks but I read Krugman’s piece when first published. I’ve never written to Mr.Krugman and have no intention to contact him.

            I’ve no issues with Krugman but agree more with Reich. http://m.truthdig.com/avbooth/item/video_robert_reich_explains_how_to_respond_to_bernie_skeptics_20160127

            I’ve been aware of the bernie-supporters-are-douches since June 2015. This news isn’t new.

            I still don’t think Sainto was worth this author’s effort. I’ve read the piece several times and don’t find it that funny. I should add I also don’t care for the Wonkette pieces in response to Bristol Palin’s idiotic blog. I think she loves the attention and isn’t worth 1 second.

            I believe Bernie Sanders should be criticized and made fun of often. I also think Hillary should be criticized and made fun of but I know not to make jokes about HRC here at Wonkette. I did it once and don’t feel like being attacked again over a joke.

            The person with whom I disagreed with on this thread made assumptions about my objections and attacked me with ad hominems.

            I never said the author’s piece was an unjust attack on Sanders. My objection was the blogger to whom Kaili is responding imo wasn’t worth her time. Sainto’s writing is awful. Kaili is a superior writer and I believe there are more important and dangerous misogynists to take down than Saintos.

            My other objection was that a lot of commenters on this thread were correlating: Saintos is a Sanders supporter and misogynist. This means Sanders and his supporters are too.

            I can honestly say, I’ll never disagree with a Wonkette writer again. I’ll never criticize HRC outside of my own home. I’ll never make a joke about HRC anywhere under any circumstances.

        • Mr Corrections

          Put it this way: has not calling out the racists and wingnuts in their midst done any good for conservatives?

          • greyXstar

            I didn’t say we shouldn’t call out shitty behavior. We should. But we shouldn’t use it as a way of starting a huge circular firing squad.

          • Mr Corrections

            OK, good news, that’s not what is happening here.

          • greyXstar

            Clearly.

          • WampusKat

            Ya know, most of us are pretty okay with one another (be we Berniebros or Clintonistas)… its the asshats among us who apparently need a good shaming on a daily basis, yeah? Get used to it.

      • Takoma DC

        That’s what you claim.

        • Mr Corrections

          Yes, it’s what I claim. What part of that is proving difficult for you?

    • WampusKat

      Yep, we’re all on the same side. Which is why shutting down the asshats among us is probably a good idea… is also what everyone and his dog has been saying for many, many moons now. BTW, would it surprise you to learn that the editor here is…. socialist? If you’re now annoying us what will be the response of the general population after a few more months of asshattery? Consider it tough love (for both sides).

    • Fran

      They are not “random” or comparable to other candidate’s supporters (except maybe Trump). Even the Sanders’ campaign is now addressing it because the vicious online pack has been attacking mainstream journalists who are writing about it now.

    • Lara

      I missed the sick burns on Bernie. Maybe you can point them out, because I do love me a sick burn.

  • Takoma DC

    These are the scribblings of an immature misogynistic man-boy. Doesn’t matter who he’s building up, tearing down, critiquing positively, or spouting about negatively – it’s disgusting.

    Furthermore sexist insights and opinions gleaned through the gaze of one male narcissist should not reflect on an entire group. Just as sexist misogynistic rap lyrics don’t make me think all black men regard women in similar shameful way.

    I have my doubts Sainato is even a real Sanders supporter. However, even if he is – so what? It’s The Patriarchy and it exists in the Democratic party as well as the GOP. It exists everywhere. Women are under attack constantly. Women are not valued as much as their male counterparts.

    If Sainato really is a Sanders supporter why would this reflect on Bernie? Or be representative of most supporters of Bernie Sanders?

    In the past 4 months I’ve volunteered for different events in support of Sanders. Would you like me to regale you with the negative comments, sometimes shouted at me by both Hillary supporters and GOP members? Because their mispoken untruths are often the very same.

    • WampusKat

      The point being, that an awful lot of the Berniebros tend to be about this caliber of douchiness (so sayeth the Internet) they appear to be doing their damnedest to piss off the very people whose votes Sanders needs. How is this not getting through to you people? I believe this was intended for you: http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/1/26/1475293/-So-this-is-what-dKos-has-been-reduced-to

      As was the following… notice your fellow Berniebros over at Salon on how we should just let the Republicans win because the body count isn’t high enough yet to wake us sheeple up to the Socialist Revolution: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/12/13/1458098/-The-privileged-idiocy-of-Just-let-the-Republicans-win

      Apparently, it’s a political strategy favored by our perpetually aggrieved third party candidates and their “progressive” supporters… and Republicans:

      “Ralph the Leninist”: http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/ballot_box/2000/10/ralph_the_leninist.html

      What Would Lenin Do? http://prospect.org/article/what-would-lenin-do

      “How Republicans Are Heightening the Contradictions”; http://prospect.org/article/how-republicans-are-heightening-contradictions

    • Fran

      You write, “To other commenters making the suggestion: If Sainato really is a
      Sanders supporter why would this reflect on Bernie? Or be representative
      of most supporters of Bernie Sanders?”

      Really? Have you been online lately? Reddit? This is quite indicative of the online abusive scourge of many Bernie supporters – and there is much worse out there. It is not an isolated example of the gross distortions and cult-like worship of Bernie that has infected progressive/Dem politics and it does matter.

      • mg1313

        you know what’s funny is that I read about 10 pieces a day about the havoc that Berniebros are wreaking online…yet I haven’t actually encountered any myself.

        weird.

        it’s almost like the whole of the political media lives inside its own ass and has collectively decided that there’s only one candidate for president.

        never would have thought that was possible. completely unpredictable and unprecedented.

        • MD

          how could you not? It’s ubiquitous. Maybe you are a bernie bro and don’t realize it because it’s out there on every blog, every day, persistent and clearly misogynistic. And I sort of role my eyes with you people blame the mediat. Stop acting like conservatives. It’s not the media calling Clinton Shrillary but Sander supporter.

          • mg1313

            i’m not actually a bernie bro bro. i don’t like any of them. i would ask you to supply maybe one misogynistic article. like one? maybe just one?

            because all the ones referenced in variance jessica valenti et al pieces seem to invariably linked back to parody accounts or to people linking other people linking other people linking other people linking a twitter account with 7 followers. glenn greenwald has a nice article about it. but he’s a misogynist so it’s all cool, we’ll just bomb a bunch of countries because something something bernie bro.

            i also don’t sit around trying to pretend the media isn’t in the bag for one particular candidate. they are. they just fucking are. there’s really no need to pretend otherwise. all of us live in the same world. we all see the same shit. you don’t need to pretend.

          • Lara

            You could ask 100 people who the media is “in the bag” for, and every one of them would say it’s for someone they oppose. There Is so much media that they may indeed be “in the bag” for everyone, depending on which media you consume.

            Short version: you’re wrong

        • Mickey Donovan

          Reddit had to restrict political posts to ones supporting your own candidate in /r/politics, rather than throwing lots of unsubstantiated accusations (all of them against HRC and for BS) against the wall in numerous subreddits and then upvoting them all until they filled the front page. Devious tactics indeed.

      • Lara

        And have you been online or offline the past few days to hear how Albright and Steinem are “Hillary Surrogates” and their comments reflect badly on Mrs. Clinton?

  • blaid droog

    FU 2016.com

  • psychobroad

    Yeah, I really don’t like Bernie, he’s bad on women and black people. Black people won’t vote for him, and without them we get a President Cruz or Trump.

    • Takoma DC

      Not to worry. Black people will vote for Clinton and President Hillary Clinton will help black people.

      • mg1313

        ‘President Hillary Clinton will help black people’

        lol

        • Antman573

          ‘President Sanders will give you all that free stuff’

          lol

          • mg1313

            ‘If you think that Hillary sucks then you must think Bernie is amazing because it’s impossible for a person to hold 2 differing thoughts inside their head because that’s how politics works in America.’

      • MD

        You realize we black folk are voting for Clinton because she is COMPETENT and pragmatic, not because we are looking for help like all of Sanders’s angry white supporters. Your snark is noticed and not funny. Unlike stupid young whites, we blacks vote our interest every cycle and Sanders is not in our interest. I want a sly politician who can go into the MUCK we call a government and FIGHT. nothing about Sanders or his whining campaign or childish supporters tells me he can do that.

      • Melvin Moten

        I’ve never gotten the impression that HRC is interested in helping me or any other black person…except into a voting booth. Just my lone opinion.

  • WampusKat

    Has young Master Saint Bernard (a.k.a. Michael Sainato) ever tended a garden or scrubbed a toilet? We uppity women (and some men) wear gloves during these activities so that we can make you nice clean sammiches afterward. I’ll go out on a limb and suggest that Berniebro has a mom to do that stuff for him while he’s busy doing politics from his room.

  • Fran

    Bravo! Top grade snark! The sanctimonious, self-righteous, and grossly uninformed immaturity of the Berniebros is as extreme – and repulsive – as Trump supporters.

  • NumChuck Lee

    way overboard trying to get this to stick on bernie, its the same snarly dog whistle stuff they threw at obomber

  • NumChuck Lee

    btw, no mention here of the lies that were spouted by the clinton campaign about bernie dismantling obomber care ? not as important as the imaginary bernie bro crapola

  • Tyler

    Yup Obama’s first Black Prez, people are starting to get over that now. So I guess the author is saying class doesn’t exist amongst African Americans, that African Americans are literally incapable of being some upper middle class snobs.

  • cleos_mom

    But does Mrs. Sanders have a Good Socialistformerlyindependent Cloth Coat?

  • OzzyRobyn

    And let’s just conveniently ignore the corruption rumors that have been going around about Mrs S for years now, or the calls for investigations into her dodgy land deals, and all the rest of that stuff….

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