Way back over Thanksgiving weekend when Robert Dear gunned down some people in a Planned Parenthood in Colorado, we pretended for approximately 2 milliseconds that America might have a conversation over the toxic intersection of guns, terribly retrograde and awful thinking about the autonomy of women’s bodies, and anti-clinic violence. Those were the days! But then some Muslins murdered people and we switched back to our regularly scheduled programming where we simultaneously live in pants-shitting terror of the amorphous idea of Muslims, yet completely ignore the actual factual reality of guns in America being easier to purchase than Star Wars: The Force Awakens tickets.
But the Planned Parenthood shootings were still rattling around the cavernous empty brain pan of Focus on the Family spokesperson Stuart Shepard, who is apparently still searching for a reason that Robert Dear gunned people down. Is it because he is a lady-beating piece of crap? Is it because fucksticks like Focus on the Family whipped him into thinking he saves babies by murdering adults? Naw, couldn’t be either of those things. What could it be? How about … demon weed??
Stuart speculated that Dear just “ended up at Planned Parenthood” and that he could have been having a “psychotic episode” caused by marijuana edibles.
“If you trace his path backwards from where he ended up at Planned Parenthood to that grocery store where the first person was shot and go back another half mile, you know what they sell there?” he asked. “It’s a couple of marijuana shops.”
“I don’t know the facts of this case,” he acknowledged, “but I’m sure law enforcement is looking into this, we’ve had multiple instances of people consuming what are called marijuana edibles … I’d just be curious to know if he stopped by one of those. We’ve had a number of folks who have eaten these things and then had psychotic episodes.”
Yes, we’re sure law enforcement is spending a lot of time looking into whether Robert Dear, a person who already admitted exactly why he committed his crime and whose sordid petty violent history completely comports with eventually shooting up a Planned Parenthood, was instead actually motivated to do so thanks only to weed candy.
You’d think that the Man From FOTF would have come up with a better idea than this, not because it is laughable on its face (although it totally is!) but because unlike, say, guns, the production and sale of marijuana edibles in Colorado is what we like to refer to as a highly regulated industry. But sure, let’s continue to speculate about completely absurd stuff like this rather than ever taking guns away from the likes of Robert Dear. Ain’t freedom grand?