SHARE
"Derp"
“Derp”

Is Iran still a thing? Apparently, yes. And you know what else is still a thing? Newbie Arkansas Sen. Tom Cotton (R-Teabagsville) getting himself all confused about who is the boss of Us-of-A America, and who is a newbie senator who doesn’t know nothin’ ’bout nothin’ and should shut his dumb face hole before he gets pwned (wait, is pwned still a thing?) on Twitter again by Iran’s foreign minister.

Go on, Senator, show us how you did a dumb this time:

Senator Tom Cotton (R-Arkansas) today released the following statements on reports that Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid may filibuster a Senate vote on the Iran Nuclear Deal:

First, the president did an end-run around the Constitution by refusing to submit the Iran deal as a treaty requiring a two-thirds vote of the Senate for approval. Now Harry Reid wants to deny the American people a voice entirely by blocking an up-or-down vote on this terrible deal. If Harry Reid has his way, Congress won’t even get the little oversight we were provided in Corker-Cardin. He is obstructing because he is scared. He knows that a majority of Americans and Senators oppose this dangerous deal, and that its only chance for survival is if he and the president ram it down the throats of the American people.

Sorry to interrupt, but no one is ramming a treaty to avoid thermonuclear war with Iran down your throat; you’re thinking of gay marriage.

The Congress and the president should speak with one voice when it comes to dealing with the Iranians, but —

Stop right there, Tom, and put down the paste you’re eating. Because we coulda sworn there was some senator who scribbled a letter in crayon to Iran suggesting that so-called “President” Obama does not have the authority to talk to Iran, does not even have the authority to look it up on Google Maps. Who was that? We forget.

While Cotton has been throwing a temper tantrum like a toddler who needs a diaper change, the grown-ups have been trying to make a deal happen so we could maybe avoid getting ourselves stuck in yet another endless war in the Middle East. (The grown-ups have also found some time to laugh at Cotton for being A Idiot, because grown-ups can multitask.) Avoiding war actually is the goal here, even if Cotton doesn’t realize that.

But if the senator now thinks the president and Congress should speak with one voice — all of a sudden and contrary to everything he has done during his brief tenure — he might consider letting the Obama administration do the talking, because Cotton’s chest-thumping and Twitter failing clearly hasn’t worked.

[Cotton Senate page via Simon Maloy]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
Previous articleRepublicans Plotting To Take Away Your Freedom To Make America Great Again
Next articleObvious Gay Hooker Service Raided For Being Obvious Gay Hooker Service