SHARE

HELP, JESUS!

When news broke that the Supreme Court had forcibly crammed gay marriage down the throatholes of every God-fearing American, our first instinct (AFTER CRYING) was go check Bryan Fischer’s Twitter-Twatter page. And he had said nothing! “WAKE UP, BRYAN FISCHER!,” we said to no one in particular, but apparently we successfully summoned the demon, because HOLY SHIT Y’ALL, he is having a meltdown of the most beautiful, epic proportions. Let’s point and laugh as Bryan Fischer explains how gay jihadists have just done a whole new 9/11 to America:

bryanfischer

bryanfischer2

bryanfischer3

THIS IS SO AWESOME. Wingnuts, the day you feared, the day you’ve been praying to God and Jesus would never happen, HAS COME. And guess what? Other people prayed harder, and God and Jesus said yes to OUR prayers, and apparently put all YOUR prayers in the “fuck you, loser” pile, with Tim Tebow’s prayers.

And what about suspected pee enthusiast Todd Starnes, what kind of wingnut tears is he shedding, for America? Oh, he is just very worried that, just like what happened with the Confederate flag, LGBT activists are going to force Walmart and the other corporations to stop selling anti-gay wingnut merchandise at their stores, or something. He has had a very bad week LOL:

toddstarnes

toddstarnes2

Those are some very good tears!

HEY what about those lovable old scamps at the Westboro Baptist church? Are they crying into a puddle of their own vomit? No, they are celebrating! They are so excited, because this was the day America finally made God SO MAD that He’s going to send Jesus to fuck us all up, real soon:

westboro

 

Peter “Porno Pete” LaBarbera, that wacky guy who takes pictures of guys putting dildos into guys’ butts on the streets of San Francisco and calls it “activism,” and who seems to think Huffington Post is a gay porn site, is just asking:

pornopete

 

Answer: None of them, Katie! People don’t have the right to vote on others’ fundamental civil rights.

Crying bitch baby Ben Shapiro is pretty sure the answer to Porno Pete’s question is “330 million,” because he is either bad at math, or he thinks that the 37% of Americans who still oppose gay marriage amount to “330 million.” America must be a lot bigger than we knew, watch out India and China!

benshapiro

 

The Weekly Standard is not being melodramatic or anything:

weeklystandard

 

And neither is super gay-hatin’ Catholic activist Austin Ruse:

austinruse

 

Oh, suck it up, you big baby. “Our children” are busy being conscripted into service as ring bearers and flower girls for ALL THE GAY WEDDINGS.

Bishop E.W. Jackson, the black wingnut, is pretty sure this Supreme Court ruling is totally illegitimate:

ewjackson

What, like Loving v. Virginia? Well SUCK IT, now a white man can marry a black man in ALL OF AMERICA.

Brian Brown of the very, very failed National Organization For Marriage:

“Though expected, today’s decision is completely illegitimate. We reject it and so will the American people. It represents nothing but judicial activism, legislating from the bench, with a bare majority of the Justices on the Supreme Court exercising raw political power to impose their own preferences on marriage when they have no constitutional authority to do so. It is a lawless ruling that contravenes the decisions of over 50 million voters and their elected representatives. It is a decision that is reminiscent of other illegitimate Court rulings such as Dred Scott and Roe v Wade and will further plunge the Supreme Court into public disrepute.

“Make no mistake about it: The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) and countless millions of Americans do not accept this ruling. Instead, we will work at every turn to reverse it. The US Supreme Court does not have the authority to redefine something it did not create. Marriage was created long before the United States and our constitution came into existence. Our constitution says nothing about marriage. The majority who issued today’s ruling have simply made it up out of thin air with no constitutional authority. Today’s decision of the Supreme Court lacks both constitutional and moral authority. There is no eternal or natural law that allows for marriage to be redefined.”

Guess it’s time for Brown to GET A REAL JOB, not that he has any readily discernible skills aside from sucking at life and losing debates to Dan Savage.

Here’s a hilarious picture of Brian Brown crying when New York got marriage equality. Hopefully he’ll update with crying photos from today, because he doesn’t look this young anymore:

browncrying

 

Tony Perkins, leader of the Family Research Council hate group, is clinging pitifully to his delusion, that this ruling will somehow be like Roe v. Wade, something that divides the nation, when the REALITY is that most of those feverishly opposed to marriage equality will die within a few years, and the rest will be viewed by today’s children as a modern-day corollary to the KKK. Sorry, Tony!

 

tonyperkins

Perkins continued in a press release:

“Five justices on the Supreme Court have overturned the votes of 50 million Americans and demanded that the American people walk away from millennia of history and the reality of human nature. In reaching a decision so lacking in foundation in the text of the Constitution, in our history, and in our traditions, the Court has done serious damage to its own legitimacy. No court can overturn natural law. Nature and Nature’s God, hailed by the signers of our Declaration of Independence as the very source of law, cannot be usurped by the edict of a court, even the United States Supreme Court. Americans will not stop standing for transcendent truth, nor accept the legitimacy of this decision. Truth is not decided by polls or the passage of time, but by the One who created time and everything that exists therein. We will not lapse into silence but will continue to speak uncompromisingly for the truth about what marriage is, always has been, and always will be: the union of one man and one woman.”

Poor butthurt baby! He should probably brush up his c.v. too.

And finally, this is not a wingnut reaction from today, but from earlier this week. Pastor Rick Scarborough, who most recently appeared on yr Wonkette trying to sue all the gays in America, CLASS ACTION-style, threatened to set himself on fire if the Supreme Court gay-married all of America, right in our butts. To which we simply reply: DO IT, PUSSY.

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • Nounverb911

    Can Santorum produce enough Santorum to ease the butthurt in Teabaggistan?

    • onedollarjuana

      I feel sorry for poor Richard. Now he’ll have to marry his dog..

      • FlownOver

        At least they’re registered at PetSmart

    • jesuswasablack

      Everyone back on the pile!

  • JohnBull

    This Sunday you better believe the churches will be packed with God-fearing, patriotic Real Americans…… who haven’t been there for years and are really confused about this socialisty Jesus dude.

    • Nounverb911

      And won’t be back until the Apocalypse?

      • JohnBull

        Is that when they head to Israel, or is it Missouri? I get the story mixed up.

        • CalvinianChoice

          Utah?

          • Steverino247

            Behind the Zion Curtain…

  • memzilla

    Wingnut Butthurt is the most FAAAAAAAAAbulous of butthurts!
    .

    • LarryHoudini

      NEEDS MOAR BURNT CONFEDERATE FLAGS

    • AngryBlakGuy

      …I’m not sure if you know this, but now that the homo-gays can marry. That eagle is actually Obummers new wife! So have some respect for the new first lady damnit!!!

    • Lord-Nash

      You forgot his birth certificate and Osama Bin Laden.

  • TeenLaQueefa

    Don’t take it so hard fellas, unless you want it hard!

  • JMPesq

    Well all social conservative bigots are Bull Connor, duh, just lie Bull Connor himself was another social conservative, that’s always been the case.

  • CalvinianChoice

    Jeb! was asked about the ruling.

    “I don’t understand the question.”

    • LarryHoudini

      I call him Jeb?!

  • Nounverb911

    When does Bristol Palin announce that she’s marrying the nanny?

    • Belasaurius

      that’s hot. pay per view?

    • ChiBizzGuy

      Fran Drescher has much better taste. Oh, Mr. Sheffield!

  • AntiDerpomeme

    Whew, are these fundi numbnutz going to be disappointed when NOTHING happens as a result of this ruling, except that more people that love each other can now affirm those bonds in matrimony. This is what being on the wrong side of history looks like, folks.

    • I dunno. Looks like rain here . . .

      • Belasaurius

        clear blue skies in Texas, oddly enough.

      • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

        The west coast of the continent could use some of that rain action.

    • OneYieldRegular

      Playing victim sustains them even more than the love of Jesus they claim to worship.

  • cousin itt

    And the event that will usher in the Rapture:

    Evolution gay marries climate change.

    • Seriously, I think the rapture happened a few years ago and nobody noticed.

      • TxSpinyLizrd

        Nah, if it happened as they describe it to be, they’d all be gone and the rest of us wouldn’t have to listen to them whining.

        • artem1s

          isn’t there something about 1000 years of peace and prosperity after the rapture but before judgement day too? dammit Jeebus, we’re tired of these moral scolds. Get on with that Rapture already!

          • FlownOver

            If it happened it would be cute to see all the assholes left wondering why they’re still here.

  • Rick Scarborough burning himself alive? I’ll bring the marshmallows and sticks!!! You bring the chocolate and graham crackers!!!

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Is the taste of a roasted marshmallow tainted by the type accellerant Scarborough uses?

    • Why, no, no they’re not!

      • EmmettGrogan

        No but it will be tainted by Scarborough himself. I think I’d rather forego those marshmallows.

    • Blank Ron

      Do you mean the pure, pure fat in his head?

  • Mehmeisterjr

    This thread is best appreciated when playing Johnny Ray’s “Cry” in the background.

  • FauxAntocles

    “Natural Law”? Natural law says fuck whomever, whenever and hope you reproduce. Marriage is socially defined – in the bibble it was defined as “have as many wives as you possibly can plus concubines”. We just do it a little different in the here and now.

    • THANKS SCOTUS

      • Msgr_Moment

        Mmmmm… I’ll have a side of beef, too.

      • mailman27

        Dog on cow marriage!!1!!! Seems like the cow’s not that into it.

      • Steverino247

        Is it in yet, Sparky?

    • Barley_Brains

      Hehe. You wrote ‘bibble.’

    • EmmettGrogan

      Love your comment, you obviously know science!

  • Belasaurius

    so God who didn’t destroy the USA USA USA! over the wiping out of Native Americans, or the enslavement of blacks, and Jim Crow, and ____(fill in blank) is finally going to destroy us over this. Fuck it and fuck these doomsayers.

    Ok, back to the snark

    • data_ninja

      Doomsayers have always been the laziest people to me, seriously. They don’t want to change anything or take the time to make things better, because “it’s all gonna end soon anyways!”. Uh-huh, like all those crazies been saying for years/decades/centuries now. And those Rapture folks are just the latest of the End Times cult, sitting around refusing to do anything that might mitigate a happy future. (not to be confused with scientists who have facts and evidence stating that if we don’t fix our shit soon, the Earth really won’t have a future – with us on it).

      • Blank Ron

        The difference is that they don’t get to escape ahead of time from the REAL end. *sighs*

    • mtn_philosoph

      God responded to today’s SCOTUS decision by reducing the number of people I have to spend all night nervously scanning the woods around my house for by one. That looks an awful lot like like divine approval to me.

  • whatwhomever

    I’m surprised the Weakly Standard didn’t spell it “you will be ass-imilated”. What’s wrong with them?

    • AntiDerpomeme

      That seems more in line with something Wonkette might use in a headline. It’s not just about the dick jokes here.

    • arglebargle

      And where can I get a “cup of iniquity”? Or mebby even a pint?

    • EmmettGrogan

      Obviously they don’t know how to spell. But there are other, numerous things wrong with them as well, too many to list here.

  • QHarp

    I’m so turned on right now.

    • elviouslyqueer

      For real. I love it when wingnuts talk filthy to me.

      • Steverino247

        And it’s free. You usually have to pay good money to be talked to like that.

  • JMPesq

    As always, wingnuts prove they don’t even know the meanings of the words “freedom” and “liberty”; there is actually no right to oppress others, and getting rid of discrimination is not in fact against anyone’s liberties, but the opposite.

    • Skwerl King

      Naw, theys just remembering it in the Southern Heritage way: The freedom to own slaves and tell others what they can do.

    • FlownOver

      Also not sure about the words “chair,” “driveway” or “400 meter relay.”

  • Randy Riddle

    What kind of melt-down is happening at FoxNews? It’s not really a melt-down until FoxNews BENGHANZIS it to death.

    • one_who_wanders

      And Breitbart news!! Inquiring minds and all that.

      • Boscoe

        Man, they have way too many things to freak out about this week! If they don’t pace themselves, they’re gonna have an aneurysm…

        • I, for one, encourage them to not pace themselves…

        • CalvinianChoice

          Or an abortion.

        • Steverino247

          When?

        • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

          ANURISMS ALL AROUND!!!!

    • nmmagyar

      I dropped by The Blaze, because I’m a masochist, and was actually disappointed by the meh level of butthurt.

  • elviouslyqueer

    In related news, Preparation H stock just SKYROCKETED.

    • Rocky

      K-Y is having a surge as well

      • elviouslyqueer

        Heh heh. “Surge.” Hee.

    • memzilla

      I can think of a few people who should go sit in a tub of Veet®.

  • cousin itt

    When “the dawn of humanity” is thrown out there, let’s remember the reality: gazelles make great wedding gifts.

  • Shalimar

    Bryan Fischer: I saw Satan dancing with delight

    Run!!!! He’s in the house!!!!

    Wait, what the fuck is Bryan Fischer doing with Satan? I did not know he was into that sort of thing.

    • Reddishrabbit

      Satan likes to keep company with similar people (prideful, hateful et etc).
      I think it is a different Satan then the Satanic Temple one, he is cool

    • mtn_philosoph

      Who (re)wrote the Book of Love?

  • Rocky

    Wait, the folks with the huge sticks up their asses are just NOW complaining about butthurt??

  • r m reddicks
  • fawkedifiknow

    Pastor Rick: I have some extra gasoline if you are needing to get some. I’ll even give it to you free.

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Pro tip: mix gas & diesel half and half for more effective self immolation.

      • r m reddicks

        Do remember to wrap yourself in the stars & bars first.

      • r m reddicks

        Think it’s covered under the ACA?

      • Blank Ron

        I was gonna suggest 5% diesel and 95% ammonium nitrate. For that Fourth of July effect.

  • borninatrailer

    Today is another good day.

  • Vienna Woods

    I am assuming that anyone who lost a loved one on 9/11 would want to extend a hearty “Fuck You, and the ass you rode in on” to Bryan Fischer.

    • jmk

      You got that right.

  • amazon_ww

    Rick Scarborough: I am mailing you a book of matches.

  • Rocky

    Well, those twin towers were kinda homo-phallic…

    • natoslug

      Sure, if you’re into reptile porn.

      And yes, I admit that I giggle sometimes when Dodge ads tout their impressive hemis.

  • memzilla

    Hollywood is on it! Spielberg’s Gay Transformers movie comes out next summer!

    • Quickly followed by YOUR-ASSES PARK . . .

      • AntiDerpomeme

        Certainly, X Men, The Hunger Games and Rear Window will need to be remade. If Johnny Depp agrees to an Ass Pirates of the Caribbean sequel, I might go see that.

    • AngryBlakGuy

      …it’s too late, we are all doomed!!!

      • LaylaOhGee

        Oh my. Who sells that?! Asking for a friend, of course.

  • natoslug

    Don’t be such a flamer, Pastor Rick! On second thought, let that rage burn and do what you have to do, as long as you only hurt yourself.

    • Antimassacree

      On fire for the Lord!

    • OneYieldRegular

      Rick Scarborough does realize, does he not, that his sordid S&M fantasy of self-immolation figures prominently in one of the great American gay novels, Terry Andrews’ The Story of Harold. Is he intending it to be an homage?

      • natoslug

        That would require that he actually thought about it beyond “hmmm, how can I get myself in the news again? Nobody’s paying attention to MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

  • AngryBlakGuy

    GEEZ, what are you guys doing still writing these articles? Havent you guys heard?! Now We are free to get as many inter species marriages, polygamous marriages and brother and sister marriages(or as I like to call it, the full DUGGAR) as we want!!! I’m gonna get 3 today and 7 tomorrow!!!

    • Boscoe

      Is PetSmart having a sale? (I’m asking for a friend)

      • Does PetSmart have a gift registry?

      • AngryBlakGuy

        …does this now mean “puppy mills” can be prosecuted as sex traffickers? The slippery slope has just begun!!!!

        • Steverino247

          That was brilliant. You keep this up and you’ll have to change your name.

    • natoslug

      I only gay married my dog to get around those hateful speciest “No Dogs Allowed” signs.

      • Blank Ron

        So he identifies as human now?

        • natoslug

          He’s more bi-curious — identifies as cat during feeding time and dog the rest of the day.

    • ginos_way

      Trying to line up an Assembly of God minister to gay/polygamy marry me and my pups. One’s a lady pup; the other, a dude pup. Only one of us isn’t fixed. Let me be, now, y’all. I’m gonna be on the phone for a while.

      • Biff52

        I’ll be in my bunk Dogloo.

    • EmmettGrogan

      I’ll happily volunteer to be your maid of honor for all of them!

    • mtn_philosoph

      Getting ready to swipe right on SpeciesMingle™ as we speak.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Wow, and they accuse gays of being drama queens…

  • Hemp Dogbane

    Bryan Fissure is gonna take his Chevy to the levee…

    • natoslug

      He’ll blow a Rod when he gets there. And maybe a Steve.

      • Steverino247

        Well, no offense, but it will be some other Steve.

        • natoslug

          Steve Seagal?

          • Steverino247

            If he consents…

    • Spotts1701

      He ain’t getting any of my whiskey and rye.

    • Amy!

      Give ‘im a break, guys. Levi’s dry, and Bry’s not carrying any lube, after driving all that way. Anyway, he’s just in this to get some of that whiskey and rye action.

      The rest of us can look forward to him singing: “this’ll be the day that …”

  • nightmoth

    According to Fischer, this is as bad as Pearl Harbor, 9/11, and Buddy Holly dying in a plane crash. Uh, how about NONE of them, Katie.

    • How dare he invoke the lyrics to American Pie for this!!!

  • Lazy Media
  • The next round of iniquity is on me, you gays!

    TO ALL MY FRIENNNDDDS!

    • OneYieldRegular

      What a nice way to learn about the ruling – being awakened by helicopters hovering over the Castro and knowing right away why they were there.

      • I could hear them (and still can!) from Alamo Square, and couldn’t be happier that they aren’t up there covering a suspicious apartment fire in the Mission, for once.

        And as possible interest to a fellow local, here’s a subtle celebratory shout-out that I just created and posted to the Facebook page of the collective at which I’m a dealer:

  • a_pink_poodle

    In that picture of the gay steamroller, there’s a sign that says photography store.

    My dyslexia initially interpreted it as pornography store.

    • EmmettGrogan

      Which will probably improve the quality of porn!

  • Oblios_Cap

    I need to buy some stock in KY Jelly. Those fuckers will be using it up with that much butt hurt going around.

    • EmmettGrogan

      Yes. And someone needs to tell Rick Scarborough that suicide is a HUGE NO-NO in the Christian religion. Guess he didn’t get the bulletin. Either way, he’s screwed – if he sets himself on fire (I’ll be happy to bring the matches) he commits suicide and if he doesn’t he looks mighty STOOPID. Oh wait, he looks stoopid anyway, amiright?

      • Amy!

        “What’s a guy got to do around here to get some action, set himself on fire?”

        It’s an idiom, Scarboy. One letter away from what your friends keep calling you.

  • Charles Cates

    Prick Perry: “I am disappointed the Supreme Court today chose to change the centuries
    old definition of marriage as between one man and one woman. I’m a firm
    believer in traditional marriage, and I also believe the 10th Amendment
    leaves it to each state to decide this issue. I fundamentally disagree
    with the court rewriting the law and assaulting the 10th Amendment. Our
    founding fathers did not intend for the judicial branch to legislate
    from the bench, and as president, I would appoint strict Constitutional
    conservatives who will apply the law as written.” (Hmm, didn’t the judicial branch legislate when they decided Citizens United?)

    • Tendernob

      This is why our founding fathers created three branches of government: the legislative, the judicial… and um, I forgot the third one.

  • ArgieBargie

    Why do Wingnuts hate the Constitution so much?

  • Can I hope that the RWNJ’s will now stop trying to overturn Roe v. Wade, and focus on this decision for a while? Women really need to catch a break here.

    • Angry_Cop

      They can multitask. I would hope we could as well.

    • artem1s

      I’m pretty sure the venn diagram on slut shaming and ghey hating is 99.9999999% overlapping so no, not gonna happen.

      • marxalot

        It’s the only time when they acknowledge that ghey wimmin are real, when they’re trying to find them the Right Man to convert them into slutz.

  • flifishun

    It’s like 9/11 times 1000!

    • nmmagyar

      818.1818

    • arglebargle

      1,125?

    • say wha

      Math IS hard.

  • say wha

    And this decision will negatively impact their lives HOW, exactly?

    • nmmagyar

      Cuts off their grift stream, obviously.

      • artem1s

        dingdingdingdingdingdingding!

      • Antimassacree

        No, they will grift all the more intensely from an ever dwindling number of the ‘righteous remnant’ (self-identified, of course)

  • Anarchy Pony

    That is a lot of derp.

  • LarryHoudini

    Before today, NOM stood for the National Organization for Marriage. After today, it’s the sound coming from lesbian honeymoon suites.

  • Reddishrabbit

    My work production is sooooo down today, just sitting back enjoying all the butthurt.

    • Skippy2000

      ditto

  • Msgr_Moment

    I dunno. I guess I shot my wad not-commenting on the last article. Will take me a while to reload.

  • PsycWench

    From Mississippi’s articles of secession Our position is thoroughly identified with the institution of slavery–
    the greatest material interest of the world. Its labor supplies the
    product which constitutes by far the largest and most important portions
    of commerce of the earth. These products are peculiar to the climate
    verging on the tropical regions, and by an imperious law of nature, none
    but the black race can bear exposure to the tropical sun.

    Fischer, LaBarbera, Perkins and crew….your statements are going to sound an awful lot like this in a few years.

  • marxalot

    DO IT. GO FOR THE HIGH SCORE, SISSY.
    Ahem.
    With votes?

  • Tendernob

    ..

  • Relativicus

    So what’s 9/11 now? Can’t we keep that as is and make 6/26 the new number of the beast?

    • cessnadriver

      Oh, shit, my area code is 626.

      • Relativicus

        SATAN!

      • Querolous

        The MAZDA 626 is now the official LBGTQ car?

        • cessnadriver

          Not with those ugly wheels!!

        • Blank Ron

          And I thought buying the MX-6 was a good idea. How was I to know, though?

  • Joshua Norton

    Thank you to all the straight men who devote their lives to constantly thinking about gay sex. You’re so selfless!

  • Chris Meeks

    Tell Senator Cornyn, I can finally marry that turtle!

    • AntiDerpomeme

      The turtle will be happy to hear he has a suitor

      • Dudleydidwrong

        Hey, Mitch! Male or female, it is OK either way.

  • has anyone asked Josh Duggar for his thoughts on this topic? I mean, since he was a crusader for the sanctity of marriage and whatnot.

  • Msgr_Moment
    • Chris Meeks

      Thats a fantastic comic. Hate that I didn’t think of it.

      • Msgr_Moment

        With Liberty and Justice…. for each other?
        I admit: stole it off my FB feed.

  • Tendernob

    To anyone who invokes the “founding fathers” (yawn) to criticize today’s ruling, here’s some Thomas Motherfucking Jefferson for you:

    • Steverino247

      Has Scalia seen this yet?

      • say wha

        I believe Scalia is that “blind justice” we hear so much about.

    • chicken thief

      Did they remove the “And once you go black you never go back.” part of that quote or did he say that on a different occasion?

    • Blank Ron

      Betcha a cookie that no conservative reactionary has ever, EVER read this.

  • AlanInSF

    One is tempted to ask the various “marriage was defined by God and can’t be re-defined” guys how many goats their wives’ families had to give them to buy their marriage, and what they did with the goats.

    • marxalot

      Also if their wives get along, and how they manage the concubines, and how they feel about their sisters-in-law.

      • r m reddicks

        And the goats.

        • chicken thief

          The only cash is canine!

          ~ Rick in PA

  • GunToting[Redacted]

    It’s funny how when a 5-4 decision goes in their favor (Bush v Gore, anyone?), the Court is sacrosanct.

    • mtn_philosoph

      Q: Do you know what a 5-4 decision by SCOTUS means?

      A: Yes — THE LAW OF THE LAND.

  • goonemeritus

    I looked out my window and the sun still is in the sky andbirds are singing. I guess God hasn’t finished up preparing all the plagues yet.

    • laineypc

      Well you can bet the next disaster will be solely the fault of SCOTUS.

  • janecita

    It has been a hard month for wingnuts. Maybe their God is trying to tell them something.

    • AntiDerpomeme

      If only they were capable of introspection.

      • proudgrampa

        I don’t even think they are capable of rational thought, let alone introspection.

    • Steverino247

      PSYCH!

  • texasace00

    Time for my favorite activity; trolling the douchebags at Breitbart

  • dslindc

    So many wingnuts who don’t seem to have ever read or comprehended the Constitution and so many sheep who keep paying attention to them and giving them money. SMH.

  • Gorillionaire

    So the general theme here from the fascists is “we gotta be more devious, evil and underhanded from now on.”

  • Tendernob

    My favorites are the ones who say they’re moving to Canada: http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/its-legal-there

    • marxalot

      Right. Because when you think “free from the twin evils of socialized health care and marriage equality,” you think Canada…

      • nmmagyar

        I enjoy pointing out that Russia is the only country full of white people that shares their values regarding gay folks.

        • marxalot

          Don’t be silly! There’s also Belorussia.

          • mtn_philosoph

            Let’s make sure they get the destination right; it’s Belarus.

        • laineypc

          Must be why they want Putin to president America.

      • parachihuahua

        I told my Canadian friend they needed a wall, and she didn’t believe me…

    • arglebargle

      Has the Nuge weighed in yet? Oh, that’s right. He’s dead or in prison already isn’t he.

      • cessnadriver

        Poopypants weighed in yesterday. Still insane.

    • Callyson

      When asked to comment, Canadians everywhere replied:

  • memzilla
  • exinkwretch

    Pastor Rick is going to get busy with his Zippo just as soon as the “deacon” finishes giving him a blow job.

    • Steverino247

      Die happy. Works for me.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        It’s called a happy ending in some circles.

  • Joshua Norton

    Unleash the angry bigots!

    • cessnadriver

      They’re slow, so we need not to lead them too much (obscure reference, I know).

  • Joy

    All I have to say to conservatives is: nana nana boo boo!! Go cry in your poopoo.

  • Spotts1701

    I really hope Roy Moore tries to ignore this decision, if only to have the glorious image of three or four U.S. Marshals hauling him out of the Alabama Supreme Court in irons for contempt.

  • Nick

    Don’t worry. You can have cops just shoot us and claim self-defence.

  • mosjef

    A little-known provision in the law allows Antonin Scalia to marry the chicken he’s been fucking.

    • Walter Wellstone

      I think you got it backwards. It is the chicken who fucks Scalia.

    • Skippy2000

      Why marry the chicken if…I got nothing.

      • Usedtobeyellerdawg

        Eggzactly what I wasn’t coming up with.

      • Amy!

        Well, that’s what he thought, except that he’s just not getting any milk, free or otherwise! Weird, huh?

      • Fred Wertham, Jr.

        But we need the eggs.

  • SheriffRoscoe

    Wingnut tears, I can’t decide if I want to drink them or bathe in them!

    • Bob@Bob.com

      Careful, you might catch a case of the brain damage if you drink them

      • Usedtobeyellerdawg

        Yeah. You gotta make sure the wing nut you get em from is fileted just right. The bile is toxic.

      • Callyson

        Add enough whiskey and you’ll be just fine.

    • Axomamma

      Be sure to boil them first, regardless of whether you drink or bathe. No telling what is in that water, including but not limited to Santorum.

  • Jack_Carter_USA

    Has anyone else noticed that if you change a word here and there, all the wingnuts’ whining is largely indistinguishable from the freakout which occurred after the Supremes threw out segregation laws? The more things change…

    • deanbooth

      Both are rooted in religion.

      I’ve been trying to find op-eds from 1967 about Loving v Virginia, but the interwebs have failed me.

      • Axomamma

        No, both are rooted in bigotry. Religion was merely the convenient cover for both. Also, too, both were a means by which Christian grifters made, and continue to make, a fine living.

        • deanbooth

          You’re right, the bigotry comes first. I should have said that both are justified by religion.

  • notanncoulter

    can we get a webcam setup on this Pastor Rick Scarborough guy?
    it could be a very popular and compelling program.
    “did he just reach for a can of fizzy drink, or is that the lighter fluid?”
    i call dibs on the popcorn for that channel!

    • Biff52

      Time for a cosmic magnifying glass!

  • NorthernSaber

    What a week! Obama-care survives years of corporate animosity from the wholly-owned shills at Fox, Maine may actually do something about its recital abscess of a governor, the Right’s Goddess of Retroactive Hymen Restoration is knocked-up again, and then, to complete the glory, SCOTUS legalizes marriage for all of us. Hurrah! To experience some wonderful “skadeglädje” gird thy loins and wander over to “The Blaze”, where the watch is on for Raptures and anti-Christs and Jesus-knows what else. Yay us!

    • Walter Wellstone

      Don’t forget the final defeat of the Confederacy. That was pretty aswesome too.

      • NorthernSaber

        Indeed it was- wonder if someone will reissue “The Night They Drove Ol’ Dixie Down” ss a fund-raiser for aggrieved (and “persecuted”) southern wingnuts?

    • chicken thief

      The week could only be better if we had a choice quote from mah main man Louie Gohmert! Well, short of ending world hunger or curing cancer.

    • Querolous

      Skadeglädje är dubbel glädje, skadeglädje, den enda sanna glädjen!

      • NorthernSaber

        Hejsan!
        Jag häller med- helt och hällit! Vilket underbart beslut idag av USAs högsta domstol!
        MVH-
        NorthernSaber

  • Enfant Terrible

    I’m feeling more joy than snark. RWNJs? Fuck ’em.

  • Catstro

    Let the rapture begin

    • cessnadriver

      Christians: you won’t get raptured if you have any possessions, so give me all of your stuff. I’ll pay to throw out all the junk myself.

  • Walter Wellstone

    Fuck traditions… especially yours, Tony, and fuck you.

  • Oddly enough, the WBC is being the most intellectually (for a given value of intellectual) honest of the bunch. A big part of Christianity is all about the 2nd coming…and the signs that lead up to it. Why all the other “Christians” (pikers) are working so hard to stop, or at least slow down Jesus II: The Reckoning is beyond me.

    • chicken thief

      While I respect their intellectual honesty, they can still go fuck themselves.

  • chicken thief

    Five unelected people on the Supreme Court? Funny how they overlook all the underlying decisions that got the issue to the SC in the first place. For the most part, they lost locally, then in their circuit, and now nationally. These five only CONFIRMED prior rulings (again, for the most part) thanks to Antonin’s scathing rebuttal earlier.

    So, uh, ya – blame it on five if it makes you feel better, you fucking whiners.

    • cessnadriver

      They always used the “unelected” whine when they lost-but when they put someone who lost an election into the Presidency it was a “great day for ‘Merka!!!!’

  • malsperanza

    The “day the music died”? Are you kidding, Bryan? All we’re hearing today is Patti Labelle, the Village People, RuPaul, Ghost Judy Garland, Dolly Parton, and the combined Gay Men’s Choruses of 50 American cities, all singing “Let’s Dance.” The power chords alone would pop Fundamentalist eardrums if they didn’t all have their fingers in their ears so they could go LALALALALALAI CANT HEAR YOU all day.

    That said, as a New Yorker I am truly offended by the comparison of a legal court ruling to the destruction of the World Trade Center, which killed 3,000 of my neighbors. So fuck you for that, asshole.

    • Callyson
      • OneYieldRegular

        I was so happy to hear Sylvester being played last week at the 100th anniversary celebration for the San Francisco Civic Center.

      • malsperanza

        And how could I leave out Donna Summer?

    • Axomamma

      As an American and a native New Yorker long since transplanted, I second that emotion.

  • texasace00

    Everyone, please go to Breitbart, and reply to every comment with “Suck it” they are getting so very upset, what a beautiful day

    • Logic of Color

      I couldn’t resist some light-duty trolling on wnd. They are not happy today.

    • nmmagyar

      Their lead story is written by none other than our very own professional virgin Ben Shapiro. This should be fun!

      • nmmagyar

        I was wrong, I need cipro and IV bleach

        • Mary Sandoras

          I can’t go, I don’t have enough disinfectant.

  • PubOption

    Found on another site, worth posting here, I think. https://twitter.com/AngryBlackLady/status/614446615336628224/photo/1

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Scalia’s robes are just plain class. I’m sure they have a trap door in the back.

  • chicken thief

    Whoa, Westboro letting loose with the fag-word in ALL CAPS! Like any gays were going to reserve that church for their wedding anyway.

  • Candy Apple

    Hey, Todd Starnes — God said marriage was one man, MANY women. Try to keep up.

    • He narrowed it down to “up to four women” in the Qur’an.

  • Usedtobeyellerdawg

    The music didn’t die, man. It just got FABULOUS!!

  • onedrewthree

    Wait, can God see this? Can he see everything? Does he know everything I’ve put in butts? We might actually be in danger you guys.

  • Tom Ford

    Like Tony Perkins, I too would not like to stop standing, but instead, to start stopping and make my stand to make others sit up and take notice and force unbelievers to stand down.

    • Axomamma

      Sarah?

  • Callyson

    I saw Satan dancing with delight

    I’m not surprised to hear that you and Satan know each other, asshole…

    /FFS

    • cessnadriver

      It’s difficult not to notice that Say Tan is dancing when a person is hanging from Say Tan’s dick by his mouth.

    • Zippy

      Dear Bryan, Don McLean says “Fuck off, hater!”

      • cessnadriver

        Why is it when RWAC’s make “cultural” references they always sound so stupid?

        • nmmagyar

          Because they ARE stupid?

  • cessnadriver

    The argument against legal same sex marriage: “buttsecks is icky!!”

    • Anarchy Pony

      That about boils it down. There’s also the maintenance of privilege over a second class of citizens angle, which just about mirrors their arguments against desegregation.

      • cessnadriver

        And it gives you boils!

    • randomhookup

      The Founding Fathers came *that* close to including that exact phrase in the Constitution.

      • cessnadriver

        Just replace “is” with “doth be” and you have it nailed.

      • bluejayray

        And of course it was going to be the 10th commandment, but it didn’t poll in the top 10%…The thinking at the time was that if buttsex was forbidden, then the next thing you know god would be forbidding sex with barnyard animals–slippery slope.

    • bluejayray

      And nevermind that gay people don’t do anything in bed that straight people don’t also do.

      • cessnadriver

        They are a bit obsessed with gay sex, ain’t they?

        • bluejayray

          They should just come out and get it over with. If they spend that much time thinking about gay sex, chances are they are gay. Gay people don’t spend that much time and energy on it.

          • cessnadriver

            I am reminded of the “Lewinsky” affair when repigs spoke longly and in great detail about the description of the President’s johnson. Led by the dicksniffer in chief Ken Starr.

          • bluejayray

            It really bothers me that somewhere in the congressional record there is a picture of a president’s penis.

  • Notreelyhelping

    You know, there are very good people, the deeply devout, who in their heart of hearts, will be troubled…. Nah. Fuck ’em. Love wins. Get over yourself.

    • bluejayray

      They really do need to grow up. They’re dragging us down to the point of extinction. I’m with George Carlin on that one though–The Earth will be just fine without us.

  • Politics_Nerd

    :::waits for the fire and brimstone to rain on America just like it has rained on the other 30 countries that have already legalized it:::

    • Blank Ron

      Yeah, I remember that awful day in 2003. Took me weeks to get the sulfur smell out of the drapes.

  • Lex Luthor

    Your tears give us strength!

  • Bitter Scribe

    Pastor Rick Scarborough…threatened to set himself on fire if the Supreme Court gay-married all of America.
    Don’t do that until I get my marshmallows.

    • bluejayray

      OOH! That’s right! I DO hope that there is video.

  • Lord-Nash

    Rage against the flag, marriage equality and upholding ACA?

  • Facebones

    The salty tears of bigots make the best lube.

  • Beowoof14

    All Americans now have the same freedom, And for all you Buybull marriage guys just remember no one knows how many wives David had, so your Biblical reading is a bit off somewhere.

    • Beowoof14

      Oh and Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines so there is that.

      • bluejayray

        …and Noah was 600 years old when he built the ark, so we don’t need no social security…
        The logic on the right is gob smacking.

      • Playonwords

        Don’t forget rapist marrying is very biblical as is incest (I’m looking at you Abraham) and, If your brother dies without an heir, then you have to know his wife so that she gets pregnant with “his” child.

      • Portia Elm

        they love the old testament, it’s the Jesus-said-love-thy-neighbor-as-thy-self New Testament that it the problem for them.

  • Ilgattomorte

    On the whole, they seem to be taking it well.

    • Beowoof14

      If it hurts some in the beginning maybe biting the pillow would help;

    • bluejayray

      Shock. This is a double whammy to their whole house of cards. The sky has truly fallen. I can’t stop laughing and crying at the same time. Tears of relief and joy. Feels great!

  • OneYieldRegular

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeE0fpKjbKI

    A little something for Rick Scarborough.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Seriously? I’ve never heard this before. It is stone cold awesome.

  • Kyuzo

    “Let He Who Is Without Sin Cast The First Stone” “judge not lest ye be judged” they seem not be to following their own book

    • bluejayray

      Most of them don’t actually FOLLOW it, they just carry it around to thump people with it.

    • Portia Elm

      Jebus said a LOT of things they prefer to pretend they did not read.

    • Awesome Man

      They’re also not fond of helping the poor, healing the sick, or rendering to Ceaser etc.

      Sometimes I swear they’ve read a different Bible than the rest of us.

  • SK

    Lions. We’re going to need a lot of lions. Preferably really hungry ones.

    Here Christian, Christian…here Christian, Christian. Come on. Come on. Here Christi….

    • bluejayray

      They’re easily led, and will believe almost anything. Just put on some sheeple’s clothing and start sashaying towards the coliseum braying “praise jeebus” and they will follow you into the lions’ den willingly.

  • Incoming Ham

    Well done Todd Starnes, your tweet managed to put “your loss” of the fight for gay marriage on par with having the Confederate flag “taken away,” thereby inferring that those two things are related.

    So the Confederate flag is about freedom of religion. Well done you.

    • Axomamma

      I would suggest they are on par. Both removal of the traitorous flag and institution of marriage equality are opposed by the most ugly portion of our citizenry.

      • Incoming Ham

        Agreed – I think he slipped and equated the two.

  • Brewerofbeers

    Like I said previously: It is a good thing that the Supreme Court released the Obamacare ruling first, as the Conservatives are going to need the insurance to help with all of the butthurt today.

  • jesuswasablack

    “6-26-2015 A day that will live in infamy”

    Yes I agree the day all comment sections of all websites overloaded!

  • edith prickly

    Where do I rent one of those rainbow steamrollers? it’s all kinds of awesome.

    • Donna Rail

      Rainbow Zambonis for all the hockey rinks! Rainbows everywhere!

  • edith prickly

    BTW, if SCOTUS approving gay marriage is going to bring Jesus back, I assume he’s coming for the balls-out fabulous Pride parties and wedding receptions that are about to start.

    • Amy!

      He kept twelve men satisfied; that’s a hell of a party animal, you know?

      Well, Judas ended up getting his nose out of joint and narced him out, but … *shrug*

  • GDleftyPart2

    Fischer is right……6/26, add the number of dissenting justices to the 2 and you get 666, oh my, now you lieberals have done it.
    Oh wait, he’s just another idiot losing his shit today over something that doesn’t affect him personally…

    • Unforgotten

      Are you 100% sure of that?

  • VandeGraf

    Can I call these guys drama queens?

    • Portia Elm

      to the maxxxx.

    • bluejayray

      I have seen actual drag queens with a lot more decorum and gravitas.

  • VandeGraf

    Pretty soon these commentators are going to burn the Reichstag. I think they are ramping up to well regulated militia time, because they certainly don’t understand American democracy.

    • bluejayray

      And yet they claim to love the Constitution. It seems to me that they hate pretty much everything about it. They seem to think that their buybull would be the perfect lawbook. Have they READ the buybull?

      • Blank Ron

        They’ve looked at some of the pictures.

  • docterry6973

    Stop crying you guys. Think of all the money you can raise off pointless campaigns to amend the Constitution. Let’s see. The wingnuts love the Constitution so much that they want to to amend it in order to:

    Ban gay marriage.
    Ban abortion and (maybe) birth control.
    Ban flag burning.
    End direct election of Senators.
    Establish term limits in Congress (may be on hold right now).
    Require a balanced budget.

    What others have I forgotten? But they do love the Constitution, really they do. The conservatives just see no reason to conserve it.

    • bluejayray

      …oh, and repeal the 19th amendment!

  • This “illegitimate judicial activist Court legislating from the bench” wasn’t a problem in Citizens United or Hobby Lobby, for some reason.

    • bluejayray

      Well, yeah! Because GOD! Or something…

  • docterry6973

    I thought the Death Squads were going to sweep up Fisher and Perkins first thing? Damn immigrant mercenaries can’t do anything right.

  • Portia Elm

    Cultural purge??? Like hate and xenophobia are a cultural heritage thing, and their symbols are sacred???

  • timpundit
    • SpaceCaptainWarlock

      Except, she “deeply, deeply” loves the Republican party. I can’t respect anyone that loves any political party that much, let alone one of the most repugnant political parties in history.

      • timpundit

        Well I didn’t say I wanted to marry her. I respect what she said and did and that she was so emotional about it. And now her facebook page is filled with thanks from liberals and hatred by her former conservative followers. She’s paying a price for her compassion and I appreciate what she did regardless of the love of her party.

        • docterry6973

          The GOP is going to be relics? Sorry, S.E., they are 90% there.

    • sw19womble

      If there were more compassionate conservatives willing to speak up, like that woman – then maybe, just maybe, the Senate and the House of Representatives wouldn’t be the idiotic shitshow that it is now, and people would actually work together on passing laws and budgets.
      Maybe not the ideals that progressives or fiscal conservatives want, but you know, “real world solutions” not this dog and pony show of apocalyptic derp spewing from the fundies foaming mouths.

  • bluejayray

    Oh my goodness! It reminds me of the old joke “What’s the worst thing that you can do to a masochist?”

    • Doug Langley

      The masochist says “Hit me! Hit me!”

      And the sadist says “No! No!”

      • bluejayray

        And watch them squirm!

  • Rufus T. Firefly

    Jesus wept.
    For joy.

    • BMW

      Is that you, Dean Pelton?

  • Mehmeisterjr

    I know I am supposed to have empathy for our wingnut brothers and sisters but their butthurt over this decision is nothing compared to mine.

    As noted in earlier messages (assumning Disqus hasn’t lost them, what up, Disqus?) this decision has forced me to renounce my hetero ways and gay-marry Antonin Scalia. Believe me, that is butthurt in every sense of the word.

    For starters, Anto is far from the submissive, sammich-making helpmeet that I expected. Truth to tell, he is pompous and crabby more often than not. Yet I could put up with him for the sake of following the new state of the law. But his friends! Jeeeeeeesus!

    No, Rick, I do not want to be set up on a blind date with an airedale. No Clarence, I do not want to see your super-secret stash of high-heeled dominatrix mouse-stomping videos. You don’t even want to think about the stuff that Mike is hinting at. The whole gay marriage thing is turning out to be nothing like the happily-ever-after love feast that I expected from the Harlequin romances.

    I’m the victim, here.

    • bobbert

      I’m the victim, here.

      I never pictured you as a Republican.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Believe me, being forced into gay-marriage with Antonin Scalia changes a guy.

  • SpaceCaptainWarlock

    I will forever be amused how the wingnut interpretation of “religious freedom” is “the freedom to impose my religious views on the rest of society”.

    Now that all states are forced to recognize gay marriage, the people that were crying loudest over it “damaging the institution of marriage” are actually calling for states to NOT MARRY ANYONE. That’s right, the ones who want to protect marriage are literally calling for its destruction. Boy, the cons really love their self-fulfilling prophecy don’t they?

  • Playonwords

    For the lucky women also celebrating, I give you Joan Armatrading

    https://youtu.be/oag3I4VRXyM

  • whitroth

    Please, please, dear Wonkette, can I go out now and really get into persecuting Christians? I mean, I don’t have a supply of hungry lions at hand, but I can tie them up with duct tape, and do conversion therapy on them, until they finally are forced to believe in that Satanist* Law, “Love thy neighbor”….

    mark

    * Not, of course, to be confused with Satinists, who are fabric fetishists…

  • BMW

    How I feel this week.
    (Not that marriage equality was a strictly partisan issue, of course.)

  • JustPixelz

    It represents nothing but judicial activism, legislating from the bench, with a bare majority of the Justices on the Supreme Court exercising raw political power to impose their own preferences on marriage when they have no constitutional authority to do so.

    Change “marriage” to “the election” and you have my view of Bush v Gore.

    • sw19womble

      The US has had four branches of the executive for some time now. If Congress actually did some work, then maybe it wouldn’t be left to 9 people to do the ultimate coin toss.

  • Ryan Denniston

    Nobody fucks with the Jesus!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IONyLZn0pLI

    • nice_marmot

      Dios mio, man. Liam and me, we gonna fuck you up!

  • sw19womble

    “Five justices on the Supreme Court have overturned the votes of 50 million Americans.”
    Where was Tony Perkins in 2000?

    • nice_marmot

      Probably on Fire Island with Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, and Dennis Hastert.

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    Sigh, it wasn’t so long ago that that RWs bitched constantly about the “culture of victimization”. Now they’ve got the fantods just as bad as the micro-aggression snowflakes.

    • Upvoted for “fantods”.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      No one else can be a victim because all the victiming is happening to THEM because they are not getting what they want!
      Demmit no fair

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    Sigh, it wasn’t so long ago that that RWs bitched constantly about the “culture of victimization”. Now they’ve got the fantods just as bad as the micro-aggression snowflakes.

  • JustPixelz

    As wingnuts draw analogies to Roe v Wade, I assume special regulations for wedding chapels will be enacted (for safety!). Also waiting periods to get married. Plus trans-vaginal/rectal probes. And, of course, government-mandated speeches about the consequences of getting married.

    In other words, the same rules they enacted for people exercising the Constitutional right to get a gun.

  • Donna Rail

    I live in a town with just one gay bar. That I know of. Place is going to *asplode* tonight.

  • Blargh McBlargh

    I wonder if Scalia’s head blows up like in that movie Scanners if someone will catch it and Vine the whole thing. Just daydreaming out loud ! =D Grats to all REALLY FUCKING HAPPY peoples, friends, family and allies !

  • beatbort

    Maybe they don’t really understand the decision. Maybe they think it means that gay marriage is mandatory, like at a Moonie Church group wedding.

    • Blank Ron

      One of a near-infinite number of things they don’t understand.

  • TheBidenator

    Tough week for racist white dude culture…first the long enduring symbol of white supremacy is taking a beating, Obamacare which helps poor people and :gasp: minorities is upheld and now gay people can get married legally in all 50 states? Todd Starnes is going to be gulping down a bottle of fermented, 80 proof rat piss and crying his pee-tears for the entire weekend….awesome.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      For Texas.

  • PDX Realness

    Since these douchebags are so convinced we’re taking their freedom away through getting married, I say we actually *should*. Mandatory same-sex wedding attendance for all bigots, starting today! At least then the sound of them sobbing in the back row will be appropriate.

  • thelastrealrepublican

    330,000,000 – 50,000,000= a majority! LoL I swear some people are as bad as GWB at math.

  • Chick_Tract_Fil_A

    So gay marriage will cause Armageddon? Really. As it is written in Revelations: President Lindsey (teehee) gay marries his secret lover and, as expected, gets into a bit of a hissy in the Oval Office. In a santorum of vapors and Southern Comfort, President Lindsey PUSHES THE BUTTON DOWN!!! KABOOOM!!! THE END AMEN!!!

    • Chick_Tract_Fil_A

      I see many whack loose ends to my revelation least of which Lindsey winning the presidency.

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Other people prayed harder, and God and Jesus said yes to OUR prayers

    This line made me smile so hard :) Love wins, hate loses, and the tears of the wrongwing are deliciously salty

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Sullivan came back on the air for this:
    http://dish.andrewsullivan.com/2015/06/26/it-is-accomplished/

    Dear Dog how the wingnuts imagine they are being persecuted is beyond me. Because of course that’s what they would do if they could?

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      The only appropriate answer to all the wingnut sobbing/bitching is
      “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA”

  • Lady Bug

    What a bunch of drama queens!

  • handyhippie65

    50 million out of 300 million voted against this. there goes that wingnut rith-ma-tick where 15% of the population is the majority. it is sad that out of 200 mil. possible voters, 50 million got this done in the first place. on the other hand, mebbe it is criminal.

  • byrdland49

    They may have a point. Canada adopted marriage equality in 2005 and look at all the Biblical plagues God has bestowed on their country in the last decade. What? Never mind…

    • Blank Ron

      Last winter was a little colder than usual, so there’s that.

    • dave.lefevre

      Do Torronto’s Ford Brothers count as a plague?

  • ViaChicago59

    Don McLean called, he wants his song back.

    • Amy!

      I want Bryan Fischer to get to the line before “So bye, bye Miss American Pie,” and vamp on it until he realizes what he’s singing.

      I can’t wish he’d carry through, due to commenting rules for radicals. *sigh*

  • I_Buttle

    I guess these donkey-asses prayers don’t matter much to God, eh? I’m witchu, God. Fuck these assholes (no pun intended).

  • glennisw

    Oh, the butt-hurt!

  • Joey Tranchina @JoeyFotoFr

    Sorry Tony @tperkins
    You won’t be able
    to pimp this one
    as you have Roe

    #MarriageEquality
    is a done deal

    Hustle your suckers
    some other way

  • Joey Tranchina @JoeyFotoFr
    @toddstarnes

    “Saudi Arabia has a constitution
    inspired by God and not by men.”
    ~ King Abdullah

    If that’s what you want
    that’s where to go.

    • toughsister

      If that’s so, how come Saudi Arabia is such a shitty place?

  • Joey Tranchina @JoeyFotoFr

    @weeklystandard

    We need Bill Kristol
    to make a prediction
    against the future
    of #EqualMarriage
    … for insurance.

  • Joey Tranchina @JoeyFotoFr

    @BrianFisher

    “From a moral standpoint”
    You hijacked the planes
    6.26.15

  • Celtic_Gnome

    “June 26, 2015: I saw Satan dancing with delight, the day the music died.”

    Whaaaaaat?

  • essmeier

    Comparisons of an announcement that gays can legally marry with a terrorist attack that left 3000 people dead?

    Is there some sort of rule that you must abandon your sense of perspective entirely before being permitted to vote Republican?

    • Blank Ron

      Yes. Yes, there is.

  • Markuserektus

    After watching Yahoo’s “Uniquely Nasty” one can get a better prospective of the deep seated hate for gays within the federal government. Truly astounding that humans can act that way.

  • Blitz

    Brian, it’s Satan LAUGHING with delight, not dancing.

    Also, I’m surprised you didn’t find any butthurt over “states’ rights.”

  • Awesome Man

    Your tears are so yummy and sweet.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    Are any of these guys married? ‘Cause I don’t remember the American people voting in favour of that.

  • jim2011

    Wingnuts bugging you? Time to get the Flit!

  • Rickyphoo

    Bawahahahahahahahaha! Suck it, Fisher. Your freedom, (religious or otherwise) stop where it begins to infringe on someone else’s freedom.

  • dave.lefevre

    All the right people are angry. It means something good happened.

    • temporarily’tom’

      exactly!

  • The Professor

    ROTFLMAO.

  • temporarily’tom’

    It’s sad…I really wasn’t expecting them to be such sore losers…I am SHOCKED I tell you!

  • Claudia Mattheiss

    You know….some people really piss me off and when I say piss me off then it’s BAD. Now I respect everybody’s right to agree or disagree with gay marriage. Hey if you are against gay marriage…DON”T DO IT! Don’t attend one, don’t send a gift or whatever. It is in no way affecting you personally if you are not gay. It is also NOT THEN END OF THE WORLD and frankly you are sadly mistaken if you think the majority of the America is of your mindset but hey this is a free country…you have your right to your believe and so does a person who doesn’t believe the way you do. However some people go so off the wall and have so little sense and respect that it is just outrageous. 9/11 is very personal to me. I watched the towers fall from the ferry, I worked in that building for years, I was in the first bomb and unless you were there you have NO IDEA what 9/11 was like. Do not use this day when 3,000 people died for your political agenda! Bryan Fisher you are a certifiable A-hole.

  • mikeland1000

    Get rid of your turds today and its free.
    http://wikisend.com/download/190076/#Current.iim
    Then load into Imacro for Firefox.

    It votes down Cessnadriver more than 100 times for posted comments.

Previous articleSupreme Court Says We Are All Gay-Married Now, America F*ck Yeah!
Next articleObama Hearts Gay Marriage, Hates God