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For a mommyblog and recipe hub that doesn’t allow comments, Yr Wonkette sure got a lot of crazy ones on our story about Friday’s Great Big Free-Speech-n-Guns Rally Against Islam in Phoenix. Our favorite was from “Elizabeth,” who explained that since we were making fun of a bunch of hate-filled goons with guns, we had obviously been blinded to the true nature of Islam, because those Muslims just lie all the time:

What ‘Dr Zoom’ fails to realize is that he has fallen prey to taqiyya & has fallen under the spell of ‘creeping sharia’. The blatant truth of this is evident with every spurt of venom & vitriol that is spewed against those who seek to defend their Constitutional rights! Dr Zoom feels that Islam somehow occupies an elevated status, above reproach, scrutiny or criticism . . . Incidentally, taqiyya is the Islamic tenet that orders Muslims to practice deliberate deception with all infidels & kufar in order to advance Islam; in order to combat taqiyya & creeping sharia & understand the enemy, I recommend the “Politically Incorrect Guide To Islam & The Crusades”. Do your own research & begin with the 1956 Penguin Ed of the Koran, translated by Dawoo [sic (it’s “Dawood” — Dok Z)]

You see, if only we knew what Islam was, as explained by Jihad Watch’s Robert Spencer, a guy who thinks jihadis are hiding under every Bedouin, then we too would hate Islam the way we ought to. We sort of missed the part of our piece where we said that Islam is above criticism — we just had the silly notion that screaming “Fuck Islam” and packing guns outside a worship service is probably not a Good Thing. If it makes Elizabeth feel any better, we think Islam is just as much a myth as any other religion, and that the world would be a far better place if people were less inclined to kill each other over who has the best Invisible Friend of all. We should also note that at no time did we suggest these morons don’t have the right to be morons. At Yr Wonkette, we’re big fans of idiots exercising their right to free speech, because it gives us plenty to write about.

Elizabeth also noted that there is no such thing as “Islamophobia,” since “by definition a phobia is an irrational fear,” while there are in fact “a plethora of reasons for our well-merited animus against muslims,” so thanks for the English Usage lesson there. Good to know that you’re not practicing blind hatred — you’re more into the well-informed kind of hatred.

We also got called out by “Mike21222” for our hypocrisy in writing about the demonstration in Phoenix without also mentioning a completely different set of events:

Wow, where is all of this defense of religious rights when Christians and Yazidis and others are being raped, tortured and murdered in the Middle East? Your not defending Islam at all, your furthering its spread by lying to Americans about it’s true nature. Your despicable, you need to visit Islam at its finest in Ramadi, where they are killing the kufar right now. Oh, btw, kufar is Islam’s way of identifying you as a non believer, kufar’s have no rights in an Islamic state and have a very short life span unless they convert and bear children.

Oh, is that all? OK, yes, we actually DO condemn rape, torture, and murder by anyone — especially when it’s done in the name of invisible holy beings whose existence is doubtful. We suppose it might be worth noting that the people at the mosque in Phoenix were taking off their shoes and praying to their invisible holy being, not raping, torturing, or murdering anyone. This distinction seems significant to us somehow, although as has been noted, we have been blinded by tacos or something.

We also like how these commenters show off their vast knowledge of Islam by dropping in one or two terms that they read on Jihad Watch, “ReligionOfPeace.com” or Pam Geller’s site, and then provide a definition, which proves that they know that The Muslims are on a rampage against Christians. It sort of ignores the minor detail that most of the violence in the Middle East is one bunch of Muslims killing another bunch of Muslims (and vice versa), with ethnic and tribal conflicts thrown in for good measure, but that sort of dilutes the message. And yes, in Ramadi, the Sunnis of ISIS aren’t killing non-Muslims; they’re killing Shias.

“Anna Marie Perez” also had a bone to pick with the term “Islamophobia,” pointing out that

It’s pretty STUPID to call them Islamaphobes, when they obviously aren’t scared of islam if they are holding their draw moooohamed contest right in front of a mosque. You libs need to figure out who the enemy is.

She also noted that “YOU are the one afraid to stand up to them, that makes YOU the islamaphobe. Coward.”

That’s some pretty inventive thinking there: anyone who fails to share your irrational hatred of Muslims — and yeah, that is a far more accurate term than “Islamophobia,” but you go with the usage that’s current — is actually the coward.

Ms. Perez also took issue with the notion that anyone in U.S. America has a right to feel safe from intimidation and bigotry, because that’s just crazy talk:

One of the muslims on Wolf Blitzed said they have a right to feel safe. Really? A right to feel safe? Where is that in the Constitution? Only the 2nd Amendment provides any form of a right to safety in the Constitution and if you want to talk about a right to feel safe, it’s cartoonists who are being attacked by the rabid, muslim savages.

Anna Maria Perez lives in a very interesting world, where the Constitution guarantees your right to a gun, but provides no other guarantees of individual safety. Or maybe she’s thinking of Somalia.

Someone with the creative username “NO MORE PC BS” — clearly an environmentalist worried about the toxicity of PolyChlorinated Biphenyls but no good at using the spacebar — joined Anna Marie in condemning the inaccurate term “Islamophobe”:

You are spot on! The only islamaphobes are the liberal PC idiot apologists who pander to them because they are too scared to stand up to them.

No More PCBs had other things to say, too! In response to someone who speculated that the event organizer “would be nothing but understanding if a group of Muslims stood outside his church with their guns,” No More PCBs explained that, yes, actually, Muslims ARE surrounding American churches with guns, and it’s all liberals’ fault:

The muslims are already there. They have been there thanks to apologists like you who welcomed them with open arms. Drawing on a piece of paper should NEVER equal death threats.

The things we learn from our commenters! We should really pay more attention to the news, we suppose. Also, we will personally give No More PCBs a guided swimming tour of the Gowanus Canal if they can point to a single place where we’ve said that anyone deserves to be shot over a cartoon (OK, other than “Mallard Fillmore”). We do like No More PCBs’ way with words, though, so we’ll share his other comments as well:

  • How pathetic that just a few words or a simple drawing can cripple an entire religious cult and their PC liberal supporters.The code of islam = Silence anyone who does not toe the line.
  • So you support pedophiles and rapists who try to kill people for drawing a picture. Wow. Why don’t you volunteer to go first so you can set an example for all your liberal PC apologist friends.

There’s a certain…rhythm to his phrasing that’s actually quite charming. We wonder if he has a keyboard macro that just inserts “liberal PC apologist” every few lines.

One “Joe Foran” had some etiquette advice for us as well, and also wanted to know that we’d better not let our interwebs bits and bytes cross into his beloved Grand Canyon State:

Whoever reads this: I advise you not to call anyone names, such as islamaphobe or homophobe and such. You better not.

AZ is the best state in the union. If you dont think so then leave, I can help you with that…..now

It wasn’t quite clear what the penalty for name-calling would be — possibly Mr. Foran would set up a Great Firewall of Arizona to keep us out? In any case, this is a test: Joe Foran is a poopyhead (does that make us poopyheadphobes?)

We received this brief thought on the meaning of FREEDOM from “don’ttreadonme9,” who must really feel bad that eight other people grabbed the username first:

free speech is more important than offending someone

and some believe in free speech you idiot. i will draw whatever i want. f u liberal twat.

While “tbird90sc” had this strange, unfinished prescription for action:

So anyone who doesn’t agree with a progressive has a phobia now. When a group of people pass the point of recovery there is only one thing left.

And that one thing is…? Damned if we know, but we’ll guess it’s the Second Amendment, which usually works as an answer in any situation.

Finally, “knarfisfraud” explained that the anti-Muslim demonstration isn’t racist, and that it’s about free speech, except that it isn’t about free speech, it’s to demonstrate that Islam is inherently violent by yelling at a mosque while carrying guns:

Islam is not a race. These people are exercising their 1st amendment rights just as you are doing when you call them names. The 1st amendment exists for “hate speech”, it is not there to protect people’s right to say “Hello” or “Have a nice day”, although is does that as well. However, the purpose of this event is not to exercise their 1st amendment rights, it is to show people like yourself the true colors of Islam. When you host a “Draw Muhammed” event and two men show up with guns with the sole purpose of KILLING other human beings you blame the event planner? Try having a “Draw Jesus” event outside a church and the worst thing that would happen is that you are invited inside for coffee.

Obviously, since no one attacked the demonstrators in Phoenix with guns, we’re quite sure that knarfisfraud now recognizes that the True Nature of Islam is to put up with noisy armed morons while ignoring them?

Also, funny he should mention the nice Christians inviting those who insult Jesus in for coffee — which isn’t quite the reception that “Piss Christ” got, but never mind that — We were actually rather heartened to see this in the Washington Post’s coverage of the event: Turns out one of the guys wearing a “Fuck Islam” t-shirt was himself invited into the Islamic Community Center of Phoenix to see what actually went on during the service:

Jason Leger, a Phoenix resident wearing one of the profanity-laced shirts, accepted an invitation to join the evening prayer inside the mosque, and said the experience changed him.

“It was something I’ve never seen before. I took my shoes off. I kneeled. I saw a bunch of peaceful people. We all got along,” Leger said. “They made me feel welcome, you know. I just think everybody’s points are getting misconstrued, saying things out of emotion, saying things they don’t believe.”

Pretty cagey of Usama Shami, the president of the community center! While earlier in the week he’d told mosque members not to engage with the demonstrators, he did go out and talk to a few himself, inviting them to come in and have a chat:

“A lot of them, they’ve never met a Muslim, or they haven’t had interactions with Muslims,” he said. “A lot of them are filled with hate and rage. Maybe they went to websites that charged them with this hatred. So when you sit down and talk like rational people, without all these slogans, without being bigots, without bringing guns, they will find out that they’re talking to another human.”

Wow, there’s a terrifying example of the True Face of Islam! Obviously, the one guy was just a false flag agent posing as a demonstrator, and we’re looking forward to the usual idiots explaining that Shami was really just doing that taqiyya thing again to lull everybody into a false sense of security. Because really, All The Muslims are planning to cut off our heads.

Programming note: We also got a whole big bunch of comments on our coverage of the Duggar Situation, which we will bring you in a special Dear ShitFerBrains later in the week.

[WaPo]

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  • SnarkOff

    Dok, if you’re going to spurt your vitriol all over Elizabeth’s taqiyyah, at least take her to dinner first.

    • glasspusher

      Don’t forget proper eye protection!

      • zerosumgame0005

        I hear bleach is good for that!

        • glasspusher

          Painful discharge?

      • Zyxomma

        Always. Whether in the lab or using the Dremel, proper eye protection is SOP.

    • eggsacklywright

      It’s de Monet Schotte.

      • Blank Ron

        *groans*

  • glasspusher

    I’m sick of you liebrul PC types- and you liebrul Mac and Ubuntu types are just as bad.

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    I was going to punish myself for whining last week and not read the deleted comments this week as penance, you know, but….

    “and that the world would be a far better place if people were less inclined to kill each other over who has the best Invisible Friend of all.”
    I’m a Christian and I can’t tell you how much truth that statement is. Now imma not go have some vodka, as penance for breaking my penance.

    • glasspusher

      It’s after 12PM on the East Coast, sure…

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        It is always happy hour somewhere!
        Wait, 12pm is not happy hour? Even on a sunday?

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Sure – just make up a pitcher or two of mimosas, sit on the porch . . and yell at any kids who come onto your lawn.

    • nothingisamiss

      I find this post each week a neccessary corrective. Doc shows me the way of love, forgiveness, pointing and laughing, instead of the free form anger I might otherwise cultivate.

  • Spotts1701

    No one said they didn’t have the right to speak. What we were saying was that by choosing the venue and engaging in the brandishing of weapons, they were trying to incite a riot. And incitement to riot, in case none of these folks have the United States code handy, is still a crime when it goes beyond mere words.
    And if you really don’t think there’s Islamophobia, read about the woman who flew United who was denied an unopened can of Diet Coke because the flight attendant said she could use it as a weapon. A can of soda – what, was the flight attendant afraid she would beat someone with it?

    • janecita

      The passenger screaming and insulting her was even worse. I can’t believe that people just sat there, and let this big ass bully humiliate this woman!

      • Portia Elm

        That was terrible, but at 30,000 feet it’s better not to further inflame an obviously insane guy by telling him he’s wrong, IMO. A free-for-all in the middle of a flight would not be worth it to prove a point. It would be proper if they banned him from flying United again, for everyone’s protection.

        • nothingisamiss

          I’ve thought about this. I think he should have been engaged in the context of showing the woman that yes, we all know this is wrong.We’re with you. Still, a plane is a tough place…

  • janecita

    Man, reading the deleted comments is almost as painful as watching the Outlander’s rape scenes last night.

    • weejee

      An Outlander fan? The missus is as well.

      • janecita

        Was she traumatized last night? I totally was.

        • BloviateMe

          The Mrs. watches it too, and I caught bits and pieces of it. Pretty fucking brutal.

    • Zyxomma

      Thanks for mentioning it. Just ordered season 1 from the library.

      • janecita

        I’m so sorry!! Nothing happened, I made it up, it’s really pleasant and totally non rapey.

  • Helena Handbag

    I planted some Creeping Sharia once to help cover some bare patches in the lawn. Looked pretty good until the rainy season. Now I recommend Asiatic Jasmin.
    Mommy blog, recipe hub AND gardening tips.

    • Me not sure

      Creeping Sharia seems to require deadheading from time to time.

      • Portia Elm

        yeah, get it before it goes to seed, for sure

    • cousin itt

      We have always been at war with kudzu.

      • eggsacklywright

        And still the lambsy divey.

        • Blank Ron

          I understand that a kiddley divey too.

          • HogeyeGrex

            Wooden ewe?

        • Amy!

          Doats LIBEL!!

        • mtn_philosoph

          At least a swallowwort, anyway.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        I kudzu you for that remark.

      • mtn_philosoph

        Murmur album cover LIBEL!!!!11!!!1!

    • jviscont1

      thanks for the tip, but that damned creeping Sharia just killed all my easter lilies.

      • nothingisamiss

        THAT’S WHAT IT DOES!! DON’T ANY OF YOU LIEBRULS THINK OF THE PLANTS WITH THE CHRISTIAN NAMES??!!!!!!!

        • Blank Ron

          Not me. I’m still giggling over ‘boxwood.’ *snickers*

          • Zyxomma

            One of my favorite trees is the box elder. Have fun.

        • Riley Whodat Venable

          Well you can have Creeping Sharia or Wandering Jew. Your choice.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Do you water it with the blood of tyrants?

      • Amy!

        See, that’s the difference between liberty and religion. Tree of liberty needs these special cultivation techniques. Do you know how hard it is to score the blood of a tyrant? Man!

        Tree of heaven will grow anywhere a bird can shit. Stinks, too.

  • JohnnyZhivago2

    Zoom does sound like a re-spelling of one of them mooslamic names now don’t it? Them arabs – good at arithmetic, but you can always spot them from their misspell-n. Not surprising since their “language” is just a bunch of squiggles…

    • weejee

      Ol’ Al Jabr couldn’t even spell his name proper like.

      • eggsacklywright

        Maybe he’s Al Kaholic.

        • Blank Ron

          Not any more. He now attends Al-Anon.

          • Zyxomma

            In Portuguese, there are many words and names that start with “al.” They’re all derived from Arabic, because the Moorish occupation (which led to a genius mixing of Jewish, Christian and Arab cultures) lasted a long time (centuries). Of course, it wasn’t just Portugal, but its big sister Spain, too. Very enlightened times, until Ferdinand and Isabella ruined everything with their Inquisition and all.

    • cousin itt

      All the Moor, living in Idahostan.

      • H0mer0

        must be “Black” Irish?

        • TheBidenator

          ISWYDT….Black Eye-rish because the Irish are fighty drunks

    • TheBidenator

      Backwards it’s Mooz…which is phonetically short for Muslim!

  • glennisw

    How dare you condemn the violent hate-spewing crowd in Phoenix when you could be condeming the imaginary violent hate-spewing people in Elizabeth’s imagination?

  • Anarchy Pony

    Clearly the breeding program at the stupid zoo has been a runaway success.

  • cousin itt

    Ματθαῖος 5:5 Blessed are the moronic, for they shall inherit teh Stupid.

    • glasspusher

      Damn you for making me sound out the Greek characters.

      • cousin itt

        At least it’s not Greek to you.

        • glasspusher

          What’s ν? c/λ!

          • cousin itt

            Color me 650 nm.

          • H0mer0

            dammu making me ponder the question. I thought v would be expressed in cycles/second (I envy your Old Greek characters.)

          • cousin itt

            A quanta of Greek.

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            “Do you know the speed limit here?”
            “Sí.”

            Sorry, what language were we working in again?

          • bobbert

            Like I said.

      • SterWonk

        I don’t know enough of the Greek alphabet to have sounded it all out. But I saw the ‘Μα’ and the ‘θ’, and that was enough for me to guess.

        • HogeyeGrex
          • SterWonk

            Nice! That beats running off to translate.google.com all the time. I need to check if there’s a version for Safari…

  • weejee

    The ignorant are being so blissful.

  • Me not sure

    How could any document guarantee a right to safety? The world can be a dangerous place. The First and Fourth Amendments do guarantee, however,a right to be secure from certain types of government actions.

    • HogeyeGrex

      It does also imply that one of the purposes of having a government is to create an environment conducive to the well being of the governed. But what do I know.

      On the other hand, because that person has a strongly held belief that the government has no role in providing for the safety of the people, I say we dismantle the entire military, intelligence, and law enforcement infrastructures in the whole country. Pesky government always overstepping its bounds.

  • deanbooth

    Where in the Constitution is the right to open arms, for welcoming?

  • cousin itt

    When a group of people pass the point of recovery there is only one thing left.

    Billkristollnacht?

    • glasspusher

      “Current Event Horizon”

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      What does that even mean anyway? Not just the lack of an ending, but what group of people? Pass the point of recovery? What recovery? Cancer? Addiction? What are these people recovering from anyway?

      Maybe she means it litterally. Like, hot damn the Phillies look like they are pass the point of recovering (their season) and they could sure use a lefty.

      • bobbert

        Giants, baby.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Bristolnacht?

  • Treg Brown

    Deleted comments are particularly toxic this week. Wonder what happened to call these fine “patriots” to arms?

    • glasspusher

      *oukes*

    • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

      That harlot has her hand on her hip!!!! drawing attention away from her countenance and toward her body. STONE HER!!!!!

      • glasspusher

        Wow, I didn’t notice that! Thanks for pointing it out!

      • SterWonk

        Also too: the halfway-between-short-sleeves-and-sleeveless tops? I thought showing that much skin was frowned upon by the fundigelicals?

        • pstockholm

          2nd amendment takes precedence – the right to bare arms.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          The outfits, and the hairdos, are dictated by dad . . . whatever turns him on, I suppose. (Until a husband comes along and takes over the dictating.)

          • SterWonk

            Yeah, I didn’t even want to get into that aspect of creepy weirdness…

  • actor212

    What ‘Dr Zoom’ fails to realize is that he has fallen prey to taqiyya & has fallen under the spell of ‘creeping sharia’.

    Whereas the commenter has fallen prey to tacos and is just creepy.

    • cousin itt

      Lettuce prey on the anchovies, said Caesar.

    • TheBidenator

      Taco Bell tacos, too so they spend a lot of time in the bathroom writhing in agony. Eh, serves ’em right…

  • jviscont1

    I’d be totally surprised if Elizabeth lives within 100 miles of a mosque or a falafel vendor

  • actor212

    Pretty cagey of Usama Shami, the president of the community center!

    From now on, his Wonket name is ShamWow!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      I think I had Usama Shami at the Japanese restaurant down the block.

      • mtn_philosoph

        If you knew sushi like I knew sushi …

  • Metadude

    “The Koran translated by Dawoo.” That’s not the Koran, it’s Korean. Easy mistake to make, Elizabeth.

    • H0mer0

      you beat me to it and even got the wording right. I need to get another pastime

      • Metadude

        None of us should quit our day jobs!

        • bobbert

          Luckily, I don’t have one.

    • mtn_philosoph

      Nubiro LIBEL!!!!!

  • actor212

    jihadis are hiding under every Bedouin

    I tried hiding under the Bedouin, but her husband had a flashlightuin.

  • JohnR

    “your despicable” is seared into my brain

    • Portia Elm
      • SterWonk

        For future reference, you don’t need to use the “embed” link; just use the normal one, and Disqus will recognize it and embed it for you.

        • doktorzoom

          Oh, look who’s being all helpful and explainy! You must be an imam!

          • SterWonk

            My Indian, very Hare Krishna father, weeps.

        • Portia Elm

          ohh, thx! I was going to ask, eventually. How do you post gifs?

          • SterWonk

            Same way – just paste in the URL, and Disqus will do the magic.

          • Portia Elm

            TYVM

          • SterWonk

            The more you know[tm]
            :-)

    • RoyalUglyDude

      My despicable what? (There’s just so much to despise)

      • JohnR

        One of the deleted comments had your instead you’re.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba
  • Callyson

    every spurt of venom & vitriol that is spewed against those who seek to defend their Constitutional rights!

    Freedom of religion isn’t a constitutional right now? Thanks for the update, Elizabeth!

    • H0mer0

      I liked him when he let his dislike of Ben Shapiro known on the intertoobs, even if I don’t usually like uh muscular, handsome, strapping young white dudes…(I’ll be in my bunk.)

  • Callyson

    I’ve said this before, I’ll say it again:

    “Do your own research” = “I haven’t got a shred of evidence to support my claims, so I will tell you to find the supporting information that I am too lazy to invent.”

    • mtn_philosoph

      In Dr. Google we handwave.

  • MrBlobfish

    Are we really going to trust the translation by someone named Penguin Ed?

    • Helena Handbag

      There you guano again

      • SterWonk

        I’m pretty sure that’s bats, not penguins. And as DC comics has shown, those two are enemies.

    • eggsacklywright

      The tux adds gravitas.

  • Callyson

    Why do so many wingnuts mix up “your” and “you’re”? Never mind, let me help them:

    Deleted commenters, your remarks are insane and you’re crazy.

    /FFS

    • Portia Elm

      there grammarphobic

      • Rachel Book Harlot

        Pfffft. That would suggest an irrational fear of grammar. I’m sure our dear “Elizabeth” and her brethren have a plethora of reasons for their well-merited animus against grammar.

        • Portia Elm

          one of them may be ostracism for having good grammar…

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      And they loves ’em some ALL CAPS. So much ragey-er that way.

    • SnarkOff

      The only contractions in the homeschool curriculum involve mom going into labor for the 19th time.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Bravo!

      • Zyxomma

        Golf clap for you, Querolous.

    • Querolous

      As it has been since the days of yore.

    • TheBidenator

      It’s a good filtering device- we all make mistakes here and there with using proper tense but when you have a comment that misuses ‘your’ repeatedly you know the comment came from a certifiable genius…if Wonkette allowed that sort of thing.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Your insulting they’re dignity!

        • willi0000000

          their, their . . . clam down before you make a big misteak.

    • shastakoala

      I’m surprised they can spell.

      • Blank Ron

        Perhaps they’re the reason autocorrect is a thing.

      • bobbert

        Assumes facts not in evidence.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Someone told them once “you should own what you are”, and being wingnuts, they took it in the most literal way possible– those two words are interchangeable for them now.

  • dshwa

    An all Duggar shit for brains. Ooooh boy, that’s going to be fun.

    • SterWonk

      Thanks for the warning about that, Dok; I’ll be sure to stock up on the anti-emetics. :-(

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Right-wing religious fucknuts defending a child molester… it should be quite the derpfest.
      As always, you can’t have cognitive dissonance without cognition.

  • johngwilk

    “We received this brief thought on the
    meaning of FREEDOM from “don’ttreadonme9,” who must really feel bad that
    eight other people grabbed the username first”

    That should be nine other people: the original donttreadonme, plus donttreadonmes 1 through 8.

    • Helena Handbag

      Not to mention the dozen or so who probably misspelled it. DONTREADONME etc

      • H0mer0

        we don’t read much into them anyway

    • dshwa

      I was told there would be no math.

    • Zyxomma

      Just what I was going to say.

    • Aron

      Creepy old queen.

  • Callyson

    You libs need to figure out who the enemy is.

    Oh, but we have, wingnuts…

    http://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m22wa02oyv1qirjzeo1_r1_500.gif

    • cousin itt

      I’ll be in my bunk.

      • starfanglednut

        Oh oh, bunk room getting crowded.

        • willi0000000

          nothing i hate more than a crowded bunk room when i want a little ‘me time.’

    • TheBidenator

      Wow, Beyonce can do some jiggling can’t she….I’ll be in my bunk.

    • H0mer0

      Is she doing that Burt Bacharach song?

  • old_redneck

    Oh, give it up, Wonkette/Dr. Zoom!!!

    No one cares about Muslim, anti-Muslim, gunnuts, knuckle-draggers, sharon’s law or whatever it is.

    THE question of the day is: How about that Baby Wonkette?????? When will the little critter be here???

    :-)

    • Anarchy Pony

      And when does it start its own column?

      • SterWonk

        And, what will the new pseudonym for one-off authors be, since there is about to be a real Wonkette, Jr.?

      • PubOption

        If Wonkette hadn’t changed owners, would Baby K. Smith be writing articles yet?

    • doktorzoom

      Like everyone else who works for her mom, she has a shocking lack of respect for deadlines.

      • old_redneck

        Well, Doc Zoom, in all seriousness, I gotta say something.

        I’m an old guy — 70-plus — with a lot of disappointments, some of them of my own making, others forced on me.

        Still, no matter how discouraged I may be, just the sight of a new baby restores my faith that someday one of them will save us from ourselves.

        • Zyxomma

          You shouldn’t have to wait too long. I’ve heard a prophecy: The next great human manifestation of the divine is supposed to be born (in the middle east, natch) in 2016. Which means SHE (yes, that’s right) may have been conceived already.

  • Callyson

    Calling out the assholes who harassed the Muslims at the Phoenix mosque = supporting pedophiles and rapists now?

    No more BS, Please, Crazy…

  • MrBlobfish

    I just think everybody’s points are getting misconstrued sez the guy with the “Fuck Islam” t-shirt.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Wry subtlety IS a hallmark of bigots.

  • empf

    The Phoenix story motivated me to change my login, remove my photo, etc. Those are some scary people–not the Muslims, but the crazies who came out in support of the other crazies.

  • BillWestern

    Thank you. Now my head hurts and I need another beer. Curse you Wonkette.

    • HogeyeGrex

      Baby sure does.

  • Callyson

    AZ is the best state in the union. If you dont think so then leave, I can help you with that…..now

    Thanks, Joe Foran, but I GTFO over a decade ago. Enjoy your budget cuts while we Golden Staters debate how well we are doing

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      Can I come live in your garage…which probably has a killer ocean view?

      • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

        NO – me me me me – I want it more.

        I don’t even care about the ocean view – I just want out of OklieHatie.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          Rock, paper, scissors?

          • TheBidenator

            You both get to live in Texas…

          • Riley Whodat Venable

            Texas will be great after Jade Helm. All the loonies will be locked up in FEMA camps. Now if it would stop raining…

          • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

            No – a drawing would be more fair, I think.

    • TheBidenator

      Yeah I used to live in Utah but I GTFO’ed almost a decade ago…my remaining family tells me the air in Salt Lake City has a similar quality to Beijing while in Oregon we’re also talking about how well we’re doing, how quickly our job situation is improving and wingnuts don’t even bother to campaign here.

      • Querolous

        Shhh! Let’s keep it to ourselves. Do we really want Californicating climate refugees moving north? Build a fence now!

        • david green

          Too late – everything south of Grant’s Pass has already been heavily colonized by Californians.

          • Querolous

            I’m on the South Coast so we have some mountains and lame ass roads keeping them out.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Aah, my home state standing proud again, challenging Texas for shithole-of-the-year honors. At least Texas had Townes van Zandt.

    • TheBidenator

      Well Arizona and Texas have always specialized in different styles of crazy asshole fuck nutted behavior. For instance, Texas had the Branch Davidians, Arizona had the Bisbee incident of the ’30’s. Both states have ardent racists but Texas has a zone of relative sane people in the Western portion whereas Arizona has small areas of Phoenix that have some liberals and non-wingnuts. East Texas can easily give Arizona a run for its money in assholish behavior but Arizona seems less religious compared to East Texas…more of a skinhead type racist contempt over Texas more KKK-styled dickery. Both love guns WAY TOO much, they’ve both idiotically embraced cutting taxes on the rich while hating the needy and they both like executin’ people right or wrong…in summation, I’ll call it a shithead fucknut fuckface tie.

      • SnarkOff

        Ah, but Arizona = no humidity.

        • alwayspunkindrublic

          It’s a dry hate.

        • Left Coast Tom
          • doktorzoom

            We just want to see some haboobs!

          • Biel_ze_Bubba

            We only get side-haboob on Wonkette. At least, we used to. :-(

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        A fuckface tie? Thanks…I’ve never won one before!!

        • TheBidenator

          Ah not just a fuckface tie but a shithead fucknut fuckface tie….that’s a trophy of Ted Cruz with his head stuffed up his ass. How can you tell it’s Ted Cruz you might ask? The jowls hanging out…..

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Have you ever heard about the Miracle Valley shootout in southern AZ decades ago? Not as bad as Waco, but an outsider religious sect vs. ‘neck locals. Not publicized much, but a fascinating story.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Per teh Wiki: Christ Miracle Healing Center and Church (CMHCC) was an evangelical Christian church with an entirely African American congregation, clergy, and staff. The shootout was with local law enforcement, after the church members had second-amended themselves to the teeth.
          There was more than enough assholery and racism to go around, on both sides.

          • alwayspunkindrublic

            A little more complicated. The entire congregation migrated here en masse from…urban Chicago? Anyway, to the middle of rural yokelville, where they’d MAYBE read about African Americans in books. The church folks were a little wack, but they also immediately got seriously harassed by local law enforcement, and only then, I think, did they arm themselves. It just got worse and worse, finally erupted in serious violence.

      • JR in WV

        The part of Arizona with liberals is the southern edge, and Tuscon. They call that Baja Arizona, and they would prefer to secede from the rest of Arizona so they can live without the right-wing-nuts interfering. The Phoenix area is thick with wing-nuts, which is why Sheriff Wing-nut keeps getting reelected.

        And I always thought the sane parts of TX were Austin and San Antonio, in my experience western TX is a blasted wasteland, where the border patrol rules lawlessly anywhere within hundreds of miles of the border itself. But I just drive through there as fast as possible when absolutely necessary.

        I spent a night in a holding cell in a remote Border Patrol checkpoint, where all the agents were Hispanic and spoke only Spanish, and I feared that I was gonna get $80K worth of truck, trailer, and backhoe confiscated for what the passenger had in his pocket. And maybe buried in an arroyo so I couldn’t complain.

        A scary night. Haven’t been in west Texas since!

        • TheBidenator

          Fascinating story, I was going by demographics for Tejas and common wisdom for ‘Zona where cities are almost always libtard enclaves and wingnuts occupy the hills such as the social science documentary “The Hills Have Eyes”…..

        • Bill Hicks Lives

          What year was this?

          These used to be jobs for locals. Then Border Patrol merged with Customs and added tens of thousands of agents thanks to Bush-era make-work. I’m sure they have someone who speaks English now.

          • Blank Ron

            Or as close to English as Texans can manage.
            (Yes, I am expecting at least a couple of swats from our Texan Wonketeers.)

          • JR in WV

            This was 4 years ago. All of these folks spoke nearly perfect English, except when speaking to one another, they spoke exclusively Spanish. As in talking about how to dispose of your case, in an arroyo or by letting you go, or calling a sheriff to take you to jail, etc.

            Being completely unexpected by me ( who is stupid enough to see a sign telling you you are about to visit Border Patrol and doesn’t drop your joint out the truck? my lead carpenter, that’s who!) the whole thing was a nightmare.

            In the end, we drove all the way across Texas the next day past Dallas to Arkansas, where we were really really tired. Now I cross Texas on I-40 non-stop, you can fill up in OK and drive to NM before you need to get off the freeway.

            It’s a shame, I have a brother and nephews in the hill country but hate TX so bad I won’t go there any more. Won’t submit to the Border Patrol. In my view they have no right to do more than ask me if I am a citizen, ask for ID if I answer Si rather than Yes. But I’m just a citizen, so who cares what I think

            They could save a lot of money if they shut that program down, if you ask me, and turned the money over the sheriffs in border counties. Grrrr!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      I always feel bad for New Mexico, caught between the Scylla and Charybdis of conservatard fucknuttery.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Ahh, Charybdis, Az…I live not far from there.

      • alwayspunkindrublic

        Old Mexico also too. A popular “dicho” there-a bit of folk wisdom- is “poor Mexico…so far from God, so close to the United States”.

  • Callyson

    I see that don’ttreadonme9 needs a reminder:

    • Zyxomma

      I wish $carah Palin could understand this. Or anything.

  • Callyson

    When a group of people pass the point of recovery there is only one thing left.

    And that one thing is…?

    I’m more curious to know what this wingnut’s definition of the point of recovery is. Is it when a person votes against Republicans? Laughs at Sarah Palin or Louie Gohmert? Calls Rush Limbaugh an idiot?

    I know, I know, all of them, Katie…

    • laineypc

      Whatever makes you feel justified in carrying a weapon to intimidate people. It varies from day to day, I imagine.

      • Blank Ron

        Yes and no, since so many of them feel that just waking up in the morning justifies going around armed.

  • tiredofdogma

    Geebus. These people have no clue that their beliefs are no different from the national socialists, the Hutus, the Taliban, the Ottomans, the Serbs . . . .

    • Amy!

      Hatred is a family value.

      For some families.

  • Callyson

    Programming note: We also got a whole big bunch of comments on our coverage of the Duggar Situation, which we will bring you in a special Dear ShitFerBrains later in the week.

    Oh God, that’ll be a clusterfuck…

    http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–lrF2s3vb–/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_320/gq5p3fm8mnmcsztv3amf.gif

    • beavertank

      I expect a painful number of “It’s not child molestation to play doctor” and “LEAVE THE DUGGARS ALONE! They’re godly people, not like you heathen trash”.

      • H0mer0

        I’m pretty sure at that age that I would not have been playing “doctor” with my brothers’ pps. Like someone said about Sandusky when he was asked whether he was a child molester said that he liked being around children instead of “no, of course not!, that’s sick!” while that the latter response might have been disingenuous if it was a lie, it would have helped support his protestations of innocence. It’s not exactly 21st century cutting edge psychology to understand that one doesn’t play with their sibling’s genitalia when they’ve(the church) already told you it’s a sin to play with your own.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Yeah, well . . . normal fourteen-year-olds do NOT “play doctor” with 5-year olds. Not even religiously-fucked-up ones.

        I’m sure that the same people defending actual kid-diddler Josh (“Jeebus forgives him”) are OK with his ex-cop benefactor getting decades in jail (“he’s going to burn in hell”) for looking at photos.

    • Blank Ron

      It actually devolved into an anti-brony diatribe at one point. Plus bestiality. I was having a great deal of fun imagining how much spittle must have been coating the poor shlub’s monitor by then. Can’t wait to see what I missed!

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        They do make waterproof keyboards, and I think it’s not just to keep coffee out.

      • doktorzoom

        Yeah, that guy got banned, and not because he dislikes Ponies (which is a perfectly cromulent reason if you ask me) but because he was tiresome. I have way less patience with tedious idjits than with disagreements in taste.

        • Blank Ron

          Oscar Wilde would definitely have approved. *grins*

  • TheBidenator

    “YOU are the one afraid to stand up to them, that makes YOU the islamaphobe. Coward.”- That one was directed at me and I was gleefully ready to respond (I like insulting wingnuts a lot) but by the time I saw the comment the idiot who wrote it had already been banned, which is good because they were a babbling brook of shit.

    Wow, lots of morans from that one post, I knew the idiots still exist because open carry Texans but I didn’t realize the flying monkeys could be unleashed so quickly. Pretty hilarious stuff…

    • empf

      Yeah, I got the “f u twat” line. And since I’d had my real name there, and the mention that I’m in Phoenix, I decided to be a bit more generic in my profile.

      This whole thing, especially the Leger story noted above, is a lot like every other demonstration, be it against gays, Mexicans, or what have you. Once you actually meet a person, and see what they’re about, it’s harder to be so hateful, unless you’re just a nut all the way around.

      And, as far as the actions the leader of the Mosque took, that’s a lot of what I hear at the Catholic Jesuit community here. If you’re going to show that Christianity is a loving philosophy, then don’t act like a dick (that’s my shorthand, they didn’t actually say “dick”).

      I’m really glad that there were a bunch of peaceful demonstrators and no one got hurt. I feel sorry for the cops because it was probably 104 degrees out there when it started. As for the leader of the demonstration (Jon what’s his face), he’s an atheist, proving that even non religious types can be idiots.

      • TheBidenator

        At least they didn’t challenge you to a fight for insulting them, that’s always my favorite. “Fuck you liberal for calling me a violent, gun worshiping turd I’ll kick your ass for it, where do you live?”

        • empf

          I agree. That would have really freaked me out! ANd the irony is great: “I am peaceful, and if you don’t believe me, I’ll shoot you!”

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          Heh . . . I got that once from some foaming-at-the-mouth gunfucker (named “Anonymous”, natch.) I’d pointed out that the Constitution itself permitted the public to repeal the Second Amendment, if they so wished, and he completely lost his shit. I was going to be the first “up against the wall” when he and his gunfucker-buddies took over. (In defense of the Constitution, of course…) I LOLed.

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        I always suspected that the Jesuits would very very very much like to say “dick.” I remember one Jesuit prof I had and he was so on the verge of that in just about every lecture. Of course we, being liebrul little beast students, did egg him on.

      • SterWonk

        A Jesuit presided over the Christian half of a friend’s half-Catholic-half-Hindu wedding. At the reception, ended up at the same table with him and my favorite aunt and uncle. It was great – three people who all had different strongly-held opinions on the topic of religion, who had a lively, respectful, intelligent, often funny conversation about it.

        Oh, and New Pope is a Jesuit, also too.

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    I mean, if idiots weren’t allowed to exercise free speech, where would that leave me?

  • beavertank

    In “No More PCBs” defense, maybe he’s just extremely concerned about the number of printed circuit board in modern personal computers and the low rates of recycling seen among them. And he’s just startlingly inept at communicating his position.

    • starfanglednut

      So, an engineer then?

      • Captain Kraut

        Tscherman enshineering libel!!1!

  • Poly_Ester

    I don’t always go looking for creeping Sharia, but when I do, I look to the Duggars.

  • Rimshot101

    If Dok Zoom has fallen under the spell of Creeping Sharia, I happen to have a special incantation which will remove the curse. I’m willing to provide it to him for a small fee. And by small fee, I mean enormous fee.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      It’s nothing a Toby Jug of industrial solvent won’t cure.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Or a bleach enema.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Or a homeopathic tincture of anything, anything at all.

          • Amy!

            Just change the label ….

  • Mehmeisterjr

    I’m surprised that Strunk and White left this out of “Elements of Style.” It is better to avoid a piss-elegant word like “plethora” and use a more straightforward expression such as “metric shitload” or “whole-fucking-lotta.”

    • mailman27

      Something to do with a dumb person’s idea of what a smart person sounds like… Calling Prof. Irwin Corey!!

      • Mehmeisterjr

        And in conclusion….

    • Amy!

      It’s not there? I thought it was in the chapter on “Cromulent Sesquipedalian Verbiage.”

  • JD Mulvey

    Elizabeth is surprisingly articulate for a hate-breathing nutjob.

  • Tio_Doidinho

    I tried planting Creeping Sharia in my garden last year but it killed all my other flowers. And Roundup(TM) just makes it stronger.

    Damn you, Creeping Sharia!

    • nmmagyar

      The only plants that will kill Creping Sharia are Kudzu and Virginia Creeper (which actually took down an 8′ cinder block wall behind my apartments)

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        Dang, Morrissey is into destroying cinder block walls now? Is that part of his work release?

        • VirginiaLady

          Oh LOL LOL LOL!

    • VirginiaLady

      A friend got creeping sharia when he went on Spring break in Florida. 6 weeks of penicillin took care of it.

    • Steverino247

      As President of the Creeping Sharia Horticultural Society, I must protest! While they’re not really edible, you not likely to die from eating them. Oh, and you can draw pictures of Creeping Sharia (Reptilia Mohammedae) all you want, guys. No harm will come to you.

  • Joshua Norton

    The blatant truth of this is evident with every spurt of venom &
    vitriol that is spewed against those who seek to defend their
    Constitutional rights!

    But enough about wingnut verbal attacks….

    And let’s not forget that the KKK was just some white Christians wanting to practice their religion.

  • btwbfdimho

    There are more than 1.5 billion Muslims in the world, according to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muslim_world
    Like, 25% of the global population, or five times the population of US. ISIS has an “army” of 10,000, maximum. So, relax lady. and count the “good ones” instead.

    • SterWonk

      No no no, you condemn the good ones, for not calling the bad ones bad.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        And ignore the fact that they do call them bad.

        • SterWonk

          Yes of course, that goes without saying. :-P

      • starfanglednut

        Which it is TOTALLY their responsibility to do.

  • SterWonk

    “jihadis are hiding under every Bedouin”

    This is why we love you, Dok! :-)

  • shastakoala

    Bad form wearing a profanity laced shirt to a prayer break Mr. Leger. Hope you turned it inside out first.

  • SFRealness

    Hmm…it’s Sunday. How do I get Wolf Blitzed like the one commentator mentioned?

    • Blank Ron

      I think it involves deer beer.

  • starfanglednut

    I think Elizabeth misspelled “tequila.”

  • I have a hard time believing that Leger has a change of heart like that.

  • It’s times like these that I kind of wish I was still dating my Muslim ex so I could make comments to people like this week’s deleted commenters like being “sharia’d all night.”

    • starfanglednut

      Getting sharia’d while drinking taqiyya in bedouin?

  • Left Coast Tom

    AZ is the best state in the union.

    Not with all those chemtrails! I feel much safer here in northern CA, a long away from the AZ border.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      AZ has Joe Arapio. That’s 150 points from Slytherin right there.

    • Doug Langley

      Heh, heh, little do you realize Walmart is tunneling right underneath your living room.

  • Mary Sandoras

    The idiots guide to conflict resolution = the 2nd amendment.

  • Tualha

    Well, I’ll give No More PCBs this much: he knows it’s “toe the line”, not “tow the line”. It’s distressing how many otherwise educated people get that wrong. Now if only he were an otherwise educated person …

    • ThePuckStopsHere

      Mine fave peeve is “I could care less.” Then go ahead, care less. What the speaker is trying to express, I think, is that he or she could not in fact care at all less; that they have no fucks left to give.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        I mourn the loss of “the lion’s share”.

        Which is supposed to mean “all of it, because I’m a fucking lion.”

        • bobbert

          That’s gone? What does it (sort of) mean now?

        • Vienna Woods

          For me it’s “decimate”.Goddamit, it means 10%!!

      • starfanglednut

        I reserve particular ire for people who use the word ‘literally’ when they mean ‘figuratively.’

  • Enfant Terrible

    Sa-a-ay, you know who else made armed threats against an unpopular religious minority?

    Too obvious?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Didn’t just make threats. Followed through. Big time.

    • PubOption

      Slobodan Milosevic?

    • AnOuthouse

      Tom Cruise’s ex?

      • Enfant Terrible

        Nicole or Katie?

        BOT,K.

        • SnarkOff

          Mimi Rogers libel!!!!!

  • VirginiaLady

    Hee hee, Wolf Blitzed, hee, hee….

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I just call him his given name, Leslie.

      What a maroon. What an Imbesile.

  • AnOuthouse

    Cut and paste needs to be banned. These complaints are so old, they’re just phoning ’em in.

  • Squirrels05

    So, if a bunch of Jews decided to hold a mock crucifixion in a Evangelical church parking lot, these losers would be cool with that, huh?

    Heck: pagans dressed as Romans, re enacting their dirty deed against Christ. Still okay, Church People?

  • AnOuthouse

    Hey, let’s have a draw Jesus contest. If I could drsaw , I’d draw him fornicating Mary Magdalene. Or piss Christ. We’ll have it outside a church on Sunday morning.

    • Steverino247

      Be careful. Disrupting a religious service is still a crime in many places.

    • Saw some fan-art online once of Jesus buggering a sheep, and another from the same author of him giving Satan a rim-job. Wonder what these proud Christians would think of that.

    • How’s this drawing? Think they’ll like it and invite me in for tea?

  • D_C_Wilson

    Scale of 1 to 10, how disappointed were the protesters that none of the mosque goers were provoked to violence? I mean, they drove all the way to Phoenix and didn’t get to exercise their 2nd amendment rights on anyone!

    And to make matters worse, they had to spend the weekend in a shithole like Phoenix.

  • Riley Whodat Venable

    Poor Mr. Foran. His state can’t even keep Mexican citizens out, and he thinks us US Americans are afraid of him?

    • SnarkOff

      What a Foran.

      • Amy!

        Yeah! Get a brian!

  • RoyalUglyDude

    Those wingnuts are just sore about losing all the spelling bees to Muslim kids.

    • I dunno, they seem to have memorised the spelling of jihad, dhimmi, taqqiya, and other Moooooooslim Worship Words.

      • Kat Anyperson

        If only we could make them as afraid of the dictionary (or a logic book) as they are of Muslims…

  • JustPixelz

    I wish I could be that clueless. Thinking about problems realistically is hard work.

  • Everhope

    My Dear Doktor Zoom,

    I get ALL of my newsies from Yr. Wonkett. I used to rely on the NYTs, but you can see where that got me, I’m sure. I’m now well informed and prepared for a violent world.

    But my dear Zoom, this newsies you present above has…well…gotten under my bed. I’ll explain in a moment. Moving right along, your well crafted, I must say, rebuttal to the nice folks that wrote you from their hearts, has upended my safety and piece of mind.

    You see, I’ve been, like a good American, scared out of my pants-believe you me, it’s not a pretty sight-by all the talk of scary Muslim’s hiding out in cells practically everywhere. As my fear developed into a healthy panic I chose not to medicate, I decided instead to become defense forward.

    This brings me to my bed, by the by. For the past, oh, say 14 yrs. I’ve entered my apartment in my defense forward manner: As soon as I close the door behind me I latch on to my WW2 machete and bellow at the top of me lungsies: FUCK MUSLIMS!!! I throw open the closet and plunge my blade in. Turn to the couch and wave my weapon under it an all furniture before stabbing my way through my bathroom. Then, here it comes, I run into my bedroom, fall to my Knees & while bellowing FUCK MUSLIMS UNDER MY BED I stab away into the darkness below my mattress.

    As you might guess, by now, I’ve been free of those nasty Jihadis. But now you say this fear might tarnish me as an islamaphobe, that I might not need my machete and may not even have to shout FUCK MUSLIMS.

    I’ve trusted you my dear Dr. Zoom so you might appreciate the clanging cognitive dissonance that has pushed aside my god given right to panic and defense forwardness. I’m stumped. I don’t want to be an islamaphobe, but I surely don’t want one of them to lop off my head because I’ve abandoned my self-defense. What’s a former, well close to former, islamaphobe to do?

  • Paperless Tiger

    “Politically correct” really just means not using hate speech. No wonder they hate it. It’s like STFU for haters.

  • Because Muslims can’t drink alcohol, they have to drink Taqqiya Sunrises after sundown prayers.

  • gullywompr

    I love this formula:

    “Your despicable, you need to [perform act of self-education], they are [verb] the [noun] right now. Oh, btw, [noun] is [something I just heard for the first time very recently, so I’m repeating its definition for you, because I know things, but you’ve obviously never heard of it, being that you are too lazy to educate yourself.]”

    Oh, and “hiding under every Bedouin” is my band’s new name.

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Take it away, not-Patsy Cline:

    I go out creepin’ after midnight
    Out in the moonlight, just like Muslins will do
    I’m always creepin’ after midnight
    Shariain’ you

    I creep for miles inside your website
    Well, that’s just a way of sayin’ I’m Dawoo
    I’m always creepin’ after midnight
    Shariain’ you.

  • Pierre_de_Fermat

    Geeze, it’s a good thing Wonkette doesn’t allow comments or I’d have to say the weird comments are definitely getting weirder. Or maybe it’s just more childish.

  • chascates

    Dear Confirmation Bias Poster Children,
    The “Politically Incorrect Guides” are ridiculous Regnery products which are on the level of books about UFO sightings or any religious tract whatsoever.
    This site exists to mock pretension, willful ignorance, and venality. Try freerepublic.com instead to avoid unpleasant reality.

    Your fears of the Other are common enough and can be helped by exposure to differing points of view followed by thought and reflection.
    Best wishes.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      …followed by thought and reflection.

      LOL! Had me going … I thought you were serious there, for a minute.

    • TheBidenator

      Yes and Regenery is a white supremacist weirdo, too. I think actually the UFO sightings books or religious tracts are more factually bound than the PIGs are…

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Thanks for the Programming Update. By the time I reached it, I was thinking that this was a particularly lame Deleted Comments considering the week we’ve had. The anti-Islam crowd has been at this too long. It’s getting harder and harder to come up with new talking points on their websites for Wonkette. There was a dull sameness to this batch.

  • celtic_buddha

    I stopped shaving about a month ago and started wearing a dish towel wrapped around my head, but I don’t think I was feeling any different….am I? (this isn’t a comment which aren’t allowed but an inquiry).

  • Bad Granny

    Mike21222 reminded me of the good work done by The Ghost of the English language at The Altar of Literacy in The Kingdom of Loathing. Any way we could send would-be commenters there before they are allowed to send words at us? http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/The_Altar_of_Literacy Hillbilly is my first language, so I’m not the best word sayer ever, but man, that shit hurt.

  • Zippy

    Dear Joe Moran, er, Foran- kindly shut the fuck up. It’s not your state, dipshit. Just because quite a few of you bigoted droolers infest the Maricopa area, it doesn’t mean you get to speak for the rest of us. We’ll take 100x quiet, peaceful Muslim Americans for any one of you xenophobic blowhards in our neighborhoods, since most all of them will go about their business and let us go about ours, unlike you annoying loudmouths.

    Signed, the sane people of Arizona

  • Zippy

    C’mon, everybody knows that PCBs are printed circuit boards. No more PCBs is just another anti technology nutjob- probably belongs in a cell with Ted
    Kaczynski

    • Hardly Ideal

      A little OT, but I’m reminded of people yelling on Yahoo about how wasteful the space program is. Y’know, posting from an information processing machine on a massive computer network, sometimes from a wireless connection.

      • cessnadriver

        That uses satellites.

  • GDleftyPart2

    Jesus H, we have always had our share of obnoxious here and the heat usually separates the locals from the chaff.
    Arizona was built on people getting together to survive, anything else was a bonus.
    There aren’t enough F’s in the world to cover what I’d like to tell the neo nazi cowards that put that sh*tstorm “rally” together.
    No one here that’s sane gives a crap, that’s why the two idiots had to drive to Texas to die.
    Congratulations to the center and the counter rally for keeping it real.

  • Santana999

    Elizabeth chose some interesting imagery to make her point. A bit creepy, if you ask me. She seems oblivious to the “spurts of venom and vitriol” that are spewed by people like herself against people who have done no wrong.

    Well Liz, the difference between you and people like us is that when those spurts of venom and vitriol come spewing our way…we don’t swallow.

  • Incoming Ham

    Looks like this week was a giant bouncy castle of bigotry and intolerance, or as we like to call it “every week.”

  • VandeGraf

    Dok Z, you are being overly rational. I would take something for that, if I suffered from reason.

  • malsperanza

    jihadis are hiding under every Bedouin

    Fatwa time!

  • Jared James
  • OrdinaryJoe

    This is Raynd Paul’s fault. He went full on Libertarian on the Patriot Act renewal issues last week and left the Looneytarians with no where to go and screeching in anger and frustration like barn yard animals in heat that are being blocked from their mating.

  • Msgr_Moment

    Try having a “Draw Jesus” event outside a church…

    No. If you want to properly turn the tables, hold a symbolic flag burning outside the fundies’ church. “Sticks and stones may break my bones”, my ass.

  • elpinche

    Dr Zoom your a monster.

    • Thatsit Fortheotherwon

      “Your,” when used incorrectly, is a dead giveaway. Much more than, say, “its,” it’s like the buzzing sound of a rattle snake.

      • Enfant Terrible

        Relax, it’s parody.

        • Thatsit Fortheotherwon

          So was mine.

  • anniegetyerfun

    Mike21112221111221 followed me around Disqus after I called him a dingus. Nothing quite like being anger-stalked by a rabid idiot.

    • Thatsit Fortheotherwon

      It all starts innocently enough, but soon enough, Numerical Mike will be drawing cartoons in front of your place of worship.

    • Enfant Terrible

      Back in my Usenet days, a racist wingnut once offered a $100 bounty for my real identity and location. To be honest, I went a little farther than calling him a dingus.

  • Delu

    Awww why is it that that deranged comment from “A Citizen” suddenly not active? I did so want to comment on it.

    • A Citizen

      What is “deranged” about my comment? The truth must terrify you to consider it “deranged”.

      • Delu

        What is TRUE about you comments would be the question.

        See you said a WHOLE bunch of things about how Sharia law is prevalent in America, how Islam ic radical converts are mostly black American former convicts, how moderate Muslims don’t report the radicals who are “hiding” in their ranks, and how there are Muslim only enclaves in America but no other.

        All of these claims thrown out without proof. What I ask is proof to be provided.

        Also kindly explain how supporting an event that intentionally seeks to insult all of Islam and offend all Muslims makes the people who support it “the ones who will protect you when zealots come knocking at your door”?

        Is it just me or would such events make it MORE likely for tadicals to attack?

      • cessnadriver

        The truth is that your comment history shows you are an extreme racist.

  • fifthdentist

    I’ve never had no Muslims try to trick me with tequila! I wish they’d try, though

    • Thatsit Fortheotherwon

      Go to Turkey. It will be raki instead of tequila, but after a few you won’t know the difference.

    • Hardly Ideal

      “Go to a party, only appetizers are bacon-wrapped hot dogs and beer-battered chicken #muslimrage”

  • ButchWagstaff

    Programming note: We also got a whole big bunch of comments on our coverage of the Duggar Situation, which we will bring you in a special Dear ShitFerBrains later in the week.

    Ooh, that’s going to be good. By good, I mean horrible. You better be getting paid some nice coin to have to read such awful stuff.

  • It’s incredibly incredible to talk about how a single drawing can bring down a religion when one is (likely) of a certain religion that believes persecution is people no longer saying “Merry Christmas” at the cash register.
    Oh, and Dok – “When a group of people pass the point of recovery there is only one thing left.”
    You asked what that one thing might be. Here, perhaps?:

    • Thatsit Fortheotherwon

      Have a smoke?

  • kfreed

    “Incidentally, taqiyya is the Islamic tenet that orders Muslims to practice deliberate deception with all infidels”

    Huh. The Christian Taliban’s Manifesto (deliberate deception with all infidels):

    So what’s the word for this:

    “This essay is based on the belief that the truth of an idea is not the primary reason for its acceptance.”
    http://www.yuricareport.com/Dominionism/FreeCongressEssay.html

  • Angry_Cop

    Christianity is an abomination of hypocrisy and murder and lies.

    Just like Islam.

    You don’t see me standing outside a Christian church with a loaded AR-15 and anti-Christian protest signs like these fucktards, even though for most of my life I’ve been sorely tempted to do so.

  • smitallica

    No, Christians probably wouldn’t react with widespread violence if the shoe was on the other foot. That’s why, once I put up my “JESUS WAS A HOMO WHO SUCKED OFF HIS APOSTLES AND TOOK IT IN THE ASS” billboard in Alabama, with my phone number, I probably won’t get a single angry call or death threat.

  • > When a group of people pass the point of recovery there is only one thing left.

    Right! Not drawing a picture of Mohammed = justification for Second Amendment solutions!

  • Oginikwe

    “f u liberal twat.”
    Hard to believe but in a nutshell, that’s really all they got.

  • Richard G. Crockett

    Every few days, one of my friends like to post some “If you support the flag, then…” Or, “Look at those flag burning mother fuckers!” meme on Facebook.

    Out of curiosity, I asked if he and others who revere the US flag feel they should accord the same respect to people who feel images of Muhammed are profane.

    My question did not go over well.

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