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There is something in Texas called the Institute for Creation Research, and one of the reality-TV-for-Christ girl Duggars took a field trip to it, with her husband. This is the same Duggar who field tripped to the Holocaust Memorial Museum in DC, where she learned that Charles Darwin did the Holocaust with his just-a-theory of evolution, so abortions are bad. (Homeschooling for the win!)

Duggar-in-law Ben Seewald and his little lady Jessa went and got themselves edumacated on the “scientific” “evidence” that the Bible is real — LITERALLY real, and literally literal, according to the “research” “institute” and its leader, Dr. Jason Lisle, apparently the foremost expert on saying THE BIBLE IS REAL!

Ben interviewed this expert, and Jessa shared it on her FaceTube, we guess because now that she’s married, Ben can be in charge of doing all the talking and learning and thinking for her. What a relief!

Wanna know what the Duggars learned on their latest learnin’ excursion? Shut up, you’re going to hear about it anyway, but yes, we can drink all the booze when we’re done. Teach us some shit, Dr. Lisle:

The evidence of God is ubiquitous, it’s everywhere. And in fact, Romans I tells us that God has revealed himself to everyone. And what that means is there really is no such thing as an atheist. There are those people who profess to be atheists, but in their heart of hearts, they know that there’s God because God has revealed himself to everyone. He’s hardwired us to know that he exists. And he’s hardwired us in such a way that when we look into the universe, we immediately recognize it’s the handiwork of God. And not just a god, the God. We recognize God.

So I don’t really have to give new evidence to a professing atheist. All I have to do is expose his suppressed knowledge of God, because you see, in Romans I again, it tells us that the reason that unbelievers profess, you know, they say there’s no God, et cetera et cetera, it’s not because they don’t know Him, it’s because they’re suppressing the truth in unrighteousness. The Bible says.

Yeah, there’s a whole lot more of that nonsense — like, six minutes of it! — but you get the idea. Dr. Lisle can prove the existence of God because the Bible says he doesn’t even have to prove the existence of God, THE BIBLE SAYS! And anyone who doesn’t buy into his bullshit is clearly deluding themselves, hahaha, poor dumb bastards.

Anyway, that should clear everything up about creation, evolution, the Bible, and the non-existence of atheists. But do be sure to stop by the Institute next time you’re in Texas if you have any more questions, because surely Dr. Lisle will be happy to not explain it to you further, because he doesn’t have to, THE BIBLE SAYS. Also, he has written many “books,” including one called Taking Back Astronomy, good fucking god, and you can probably buy all of them at the Institute, and Ben Duggar-Seewald-Whatever says you should buy them books, uh huh, because then you’llpt  learn stuff too.

We hope the next Duggar field trip is to a bird refuge, where they can look at some storks and learn how babbies are formed.

And yes, we can all have that drink now.

[Rawstory]

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  • Schrödinger died for our sins.

    • Anarchy Pony

      We can’t know that until we open the box.

      • FauxAntocles

        We’re not supposed to know – have a little faith, willya?

      • SYNERGY!

      • Zippy

        Werner Heisenberg on line two…

        • Anarchy Pony

          I think I solved Fermi’s paradox. They won’t show themselves until all the idiots like Dr. Lisle are gone.

        • willi0000000

          . . . or three.

          [he must be in his car again]

        • mtn_philosoph

          Werner Heisenberg on line two…

          Are you sure? Were you THERE?

      • RevZafod

        My four ex-wives always seemed to enjoy it when I opened the box lingually.

    • visiblegirl

      I told you not to open that box.

    • Lizzietish81

      Or did he?

      • JustPixelz

        He might be in a room at the Holiday Inn made up to look like a box, a cat, a vial of poison and a cesium atom. I can’t be sure about that.

      • aureolaborealis

        Only one way to find out!

    • Tendernob

      You let the cat out of the bag with that statement…

      • x_x

      • Toomush_Infer

        Dead cat libel….

        • Zippy

          just how far can you swing one?

    • jmk

      Maybe…

  • fawkedifiknow

    I just pinched myself to be sure I am, because Dr. Lisle says I don’t exist.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      I don’t think, therefore I am not.

      (HaHa! Jokes on them. Turns out it’s Duggars that don’t exist!)

      • Anarchy Pony

        So Dr. Lisle doesn’t exist?

        • Doug Langley

          I don’t think so.

          • onedollarjuana

            Can’t find a mention of the dear doctor in Romans I. Ergo…

    • grumblestiltskin

      Incidentally, you should also follow this procedure before calling your doctor when your erection hits 4:00:00, because you’re probably just dreaming.

  • OldWhiteLies

    And he’s hardwired us in such a way that when we look into the universe,
    we immediately recognize it’s the handiwork of God. And not just a god, the God. We recognize God.

    Some of us have figured out some hacks.

    • nightmoth

      “Hardwired”
      Totally clueless that he borrowed a word from evolutionary biologists.
      Snicker.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        You mean the bibble doesn’t include circuit diagrams? How can it tell us everything we need to know then?

        • DahBoner

          These nitwits only claim the Bibble tells us everything.

          But they sure enjoy their guns, cars and steel tools, don’t they?
          http://media4.giphy.com/media/QudUOhSR5YQi4/200w_d.gif

        • Blank Ron

          Ever see Alexei Sayle’s bit on that? No video to be found, but it goes something like this.

          ‘People say that the Bible contains everything you will ever need to know. I suppose that’s true. *opens big Bible on lectern and pulls out a large sheet of paper* For instance, here’s a wiring diagram for a 1960 Ford Anglia. *flips some pages, pulls out a long form* And this is my income tax return from 1983.’

          • HarryButtle

            Balowsky family libel!

    • Wee Mousie

      That’s funny. I seem to remember my hardwiring taking place at Sunday School when I still believed in talking field mice, fairies and flying carpets.

      But my parents gave me a wood-burning set for Christmas — which sucked — but I learned to re-purpose it as a soldering iron, used on little electrical projects I taught myself to do using books from the library and old radios..

    • willi0000000

      the old parts of the brain* are hardwired . . . the middle seems to be breadboarded** and the newer parts have active switching networks.

      * the bits still running on vacuum tubes

      ** solid connections but able to make new connections and break old ones.

    • mtn_philosoph

      Some of us have figured out some hacks.

      Science is an antimalware program

    • mtn_philosoph

      The difference between the Creationism OS and the Science OS is that Science gets frequent updates and bug fixes.

  • Angry_Cop

    So, in other words, I’m an atheist because I’m a jerk.

    OK, well, enjoy the continued waning of your shit religion. I’ll be over here, doing something worthwhile.

    • clever_sobriquet

      Jerking has a certain pull.

      • Vecciojohn

        I’m always ready to give it a whack.

        • riledupone

          You can’t palm that off on us.

      • jmk

        Many find it to be a handy skill.

  • Anarchy Pony

    Incontrovertible! If the bible says it, can’t not be a trufact!

  • Lizzietish81

    I wonder how much state funding the great state of Texas gives to this institute?

    • Anarchy Pony

      The only answer is too much.

    • Less than if they were also building a theme park based on Noah’s Ark.

      • Virginia Dreaming

        Didn’t they lose all their state support because the park would only hire people who promised that genesis was literal truth, and scientists were making it up as they went along?

    • Tendernob

      Um, if God’s not real then who keeps the Texans at the tip of Brownsville from falling off the face of the earth? HMMM?

      Christians: 1
      Atheists: 0

      • Zippy

        it’s actually all the Velcro

        • FauxAntocles

          And it’s Velcro all the way down…
          (as much fun as this is, I wish my damn laptop would start working – I’m gonna get fired)

          • Virginia Dreaming

            That can’t be true. Going all the way down is against church doctrine.

      • schmannity

        The damn fence?

      • Wee Mousie

        The earth is really flat, it’s just that scientist don’t know how to display a flat earth map on a globe.

  • I actually learned something here: circular logic is apparently a cornerstone of Christian theology.

    • Virginia Dreaming

      Don’t forget the old favorite, it is true because I said it is. The nuns would use that one in religion class almost every time I asked a question.

    • Toomush_Infer

      or millstone….something…..

    • laineypc

      I once asked a Catholic friend what the value of faith (in the context of belief in God or your favorite flavor of religion) is. Her answer was essentially “once you have it, you will know”. W T F

      • jmk

        I’m frequently told by proselytizers that if I make a serious effort to believe in their god and give my life “over to him” and keep all of his commandments and rules and worship him daily, he will then magically give me the gift of faith.

      • Blank Ron

        Which also applies to gonorrhea, but it’s still not something you’d actively try to get for yourself.

      • mtn_philosoph

        Guilt goes in, prayers go out … no one can explain it.

    • Wee Mousie

      No kind of logic forms any part of Christian theology, logic only acts as a stumbling block.

    • Sam Hain

      Uh, How about God spelled backwards is Dog, and I do love my dog, he’s a good boy…a rescue mutt-the best!

    • mtn_philosoph

      The Bible is literally true because God says it is true. And God exists because the Bible says so.

      Seems legit…

  • MsAnthropesMr

    No No.

    Elvis is everywhere…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpb4ZAAP6Z4

    • Anarchy Pony

      Michael J. Fox is the anti elvis.

      • clever_sobriquet

        Elvis isn’t dead, he just went home.

        • willi0000000

          . . . or he’s working at Burger Lord™

      • Blank Ron

        Sometimes I think he did ‘Back to the Future’ just to put the lie to that line.

    • clever_sobriquet

      Elvis-lution

    • Seek

      I thought he was living in a Lakeside trailer park and everything’s gonna be all right?

  • Usedtobeyellerdawg

    The only explanation for the right wing devotion to word salad spitters is that there are people who know they are not intelligent, and therefore assume that when anyone says something they don’t understand, a). It must be the truth, and b). That person must be really smart.

    • willi0000000

      i think you’ve got that backwards, Skippy.

      if they don’t understand it then it must be a lie and that makes you an evil scientist.

      [anything that complicates their lives scares them]

  • Beaumarchais?

    Huh. And just today Pew Research reported that from 2007 to 2014, the percentage of Americans who are “religiously unaffiliated” rose from 16.1% to 22.8%, faster than any religion:

    http://www.pewforum.org/2015/05/12/americas-changing-religious-landscape/

    • MsAnthropesMr

      That’s just like, someone’s opinion, man.

      • Beaumarchais?

        That slacker Ma Dugger better get busy. Those Christian babies aren’t going to just drop out of her womb themselves… oh, wait.

        • Anarchy Pony

          It’s alright, soon her subfactories will start cranking them out.

          • Wee Mousie

            Every time I think of the Duggars, I think how prescient Mike Judd was when he wrote “Idiocracy.”

        • Toomush_Infer

          How does she do it? Derp goes in….

      • 6.7% fewer people fuck with the Jesus!

      • cousin itt

        Metapinion?

    • SnarkOff

      Well, the fine print is that 7 out of 10 Americans are still Christian. Sadly.

      • visiblegirl

        Well, now is an excellent time to convert to the United Church of Satan and Baseball! We get a little busy after the All-Star Game, what with all the ritualized sectarian violence and the cook-out.

        • Zippy

          the cook out should be easy, what with that lake of fire

        • I joined the Church of St. Priapus. I must say, I get so much satisfaction out of Sunday services.

          • visiblegirl

            But we get triple-headers.

          • Wee Mousie

            Polycephaly is a pain in the ass, even if you’re not receiving.

          • Toomush_Infer

            As long as they’re not longer than four hours….

      • FlownOver

        7 out of 10 Americans think they’re Christian, but only because so many of them never got around to reading the fine print.

  • Lefty Frizzell

    So the main evidence for god existing is that the bible says god exists, and the main evidence for the bible being true is that the bible says it’s true – that’s brilliant!

    • Beaumarchais?

      It’s worked up until now…

    • laineypc

      There are some truths that are just a given. Like the fact that comments aren’t allowed on our Wonkette. This and the Bible are the source truths, from which all other truths spring. Also, the Bible is like gravity. It is true whether you believe it or not. Duh.

    • blaid droog

      ouroborus

  • Tendernob
    • SnarkOff

      Same.

  • Lizzietish81
    • FauxAntocles

      Damn! Just the one I was thinking of.

      • Vienna Woods

        Me too.

  • Fartknocker

    This is a Grade A, 100% diploma mill. Who knew I could obtain a BA in Religion Apologetics just based on work experience.

    • jmk

      From what I understand, they lost their bid to award science degrees….no…seriously. Even the Texas Board of Education was like “you people are joking, right?”

      (If you really want a laugh, read up on “Dr.” Kent Hovind’s thesis. It cites a book by the founder of the ICR.)

      • Virginia Dreaming

        I followed one of the links and read their description of how snakes got venom. Basically after Adam and Eve broke the covenant with god in Eden, the regulatory sequences of certain snake genes got corrupted and began overproducing something the snakes needed and it make them venomous.
        Evolutionary biologists have long concluded that many body changes come from a mutation in a regulatory gene that controls the timing and expression of other genes during fetal development. In other words they copied what evolutionary biologists have discovered through experimentation, changed the wording from evolution to corruption, and said that it happened because Eve ate an apple and God got mad at her and Adam.
        Seems like a good way to do research, steal other people’s work and change the wording to fit your worldview.

        • Wee Mousie

          I tried that once in elementary school and got an F.

      • Blank Ron

        I downloaded his first one (before all the linkies were pulled) but I have yet to get past the first couple of pages. The derp is nearly impenetrable, and he is o’erfond of phrases like ‘everyone knows.’

  • John

    OH MY GOD!!! (I mean, oh THEIR God!!) If these people get any more delusional they’re going to disappear into their own stupid! Like a collapsing star, (which we know is really God blinking, or some such shit).

  • SnarkOff

    So the laboratory at the Institute of Creation Research consists of what, exactly? I’m thinking: Centrifuge, bunsen burner, a flask or two, and a lineup of jars containing copies of the Bible in various translations, each preserved in formaldehyde.

    • Beaumarchais?

      More like a dunking chair and a snake pit.

      • FauxAntocles

        Don’t forget the large scales and the duck.

        • SuspectedDemocrat

          Build an Ark out of ‘er!

          • DahBoner

            I think Noah had a hard time breeding the Lions…

            http://i.imgur.com/dRsBOId.jpg

          • Msgr_Moment

            So, THAT’S why the ghey was not wiped out by the Flood! Also, too, maybe one of them he-lions was already preggers when it stepped aboard.

          • Lizzietish81

            Not pictured: Unicorns.

    • Theremin music.

      • Wee Mousie

        Only if it’s an acoustic Theremin, that was what separated the sheep from the goats in 1950’s guitar music.

  • JohnBull

    “And not just a god, the God.”
    Bible study must really suck in languages that don’t have indefinite articles.

    • Mintie

      And yet they somehow manage to figure out which book on the table their brother wants.

    • RevZafod

      Try saying it in Rooshian

  • Spotts1701

    Has someone told Richard Dawkins that he’s just repressing his latent religious beliefs? And did someone get his reaction on video?

  • onedrewthree

    So, people of all other religions are just lying to themselves too? People born in pantheistic or animistic religions secretly think one god/spirit is king even if it’s not in those teachings? Can we grow out of this imaginary friend already?

  • FauxAntocles

    So the supernatural is self-evident? So shouldn’t I be seeing ghosts and angels meandering around this room right now?

    • visiblegirl

      Oh… Are you not? Sorry! You guys are supposed to tell me when I’m bogarting, I’m so embarrassed.

      • FauxAntocles

        Well, I didn’t want to be selfish – you seemed to be enjoying yourself.

      • Toomush_Infer

        C’monnn….pass it….

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        Pass the cherubim on the left hand side…

    • SnarkOff

      I see dumb people.

    • Lizzietish81

      Supernatural added the Angels in season four, but they always had ghosts

      http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/images/f/fc/Castiel_angel01.jpg

  • schmannity

    Now I get it. If you look dictionary up in a dictionary. . . . .this is BRILLIANT!

    • Zippy

      try Googling Google

      • JohnnyZhivago2

        Thanks!!! My computer exploded!

      • Virginia Dreaming

        I got the definition of google (as a verb)

        • Zippy

          try Googling the word ’tilt’ or ‘recursion’ or if you’re unsure, Google ‘flip a coin’

          (I assume everyone knows about the barrel roll)

          • Blank Ron

            I don’t think it works any more

      • willi0000000

        try looking up “thesaurus” in a thesaurus.

        [there’s a sucking sensation as it falls in on itself then a bright gamma flash . . . good party trick if you hate your DNA]

      • Vecciojohn

        Oh no, I’m too smart to fall for that!

  • JustPixelz

    “God has revealed himself to everyone.”

    He could get arrested for that in Florida.

    • visiblegirl

      God is Florida Man! It all makes sense now.

      • Beaumarchais?

        It’s all in the old testament! He’s a sociopathic serial killer who enjoys torturing his victims.

        • Anarchy Pony

          And setting arbitrary rules they have to follow to survive!

          • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

            Arbitrary and impossible. ” thou shalt not covet” ???! So we are not allowed to think “gee, what a nice goat, I’d like a nice goat too”

          • nightmoth

            Once you think it, you have to sacrifice a goat as penance. (No matter what the religion, the priests eat well.)

          • Lot_49

            There are gaps in my Christian education, even though I went to Sunday school six or seven times. Can you answer this: if you covet your neighbor’s wife who do you sacrifice?

          • nightmoth

            Ha! Good question. If you coveted your neighbor’s wife, you had best keep it to yourself, because if you acted on it, both of you got the death penalty.

          • Wee Mousie

            If you’re Catholic, you confess it to a man who (according to theory) has never coveted a woman (and yet is not gay.)

            in Protestant religions, you marry because eventually she will punish you enough to suit the even the vengeful God of the Old Testament.

          • Wee Mousie

            And you get no marks for sacrificing your neighbor’s goat, even though that was the goat that made you covet one.

          • Blank Ron

            You’re not supposed to covet your neighbour’s ass. Even if it’s really well-shaped.

    • Anarchy Pony

      So that’s why I repressed it…

  • BearGHAZI

    at least they are the cute kind of idiot

  • Virginia Dreaming

    I tried to teach my biology classes that there are two different scientific methodologies. One is to simply observe nature, then record and classify it. That is the first step and helps us to get a sense of what types of questions we should be asking. The second type is to ask questions, and design experiments to confirm what we guessed from our observations. The problem with these creation scientists is that they think the observation/classification part of science is all we really need. So they observe, classify, and then try to stick everything into their biblical scheme instead of asking questions and probing for a real understanding of nature. It is a very elementary school approach to science.
    Okay, we return you to your regularly scheduled snark now.

    • SnarkOff

      ..and then, right after that lesson, I assume you “taught the controversy.”

      • Virginia Dreaming

        Not really, but I was completely open to letting my more religious students ask any questions they wanted. I never really got any questions that I couldn’t address. Well except for one guy who just kept saying, I didn’t come from no damn monkey. But by the end of the year, he kind of let go that and seemed to accept that he didn’t come from a monkey, but that the apes and him were related though somewhat distantly.

        • jmk

          Human chromosome 2 is hard to get past, even for these twits.

        • Wee Mousie

          I believe young monkeys experience difficulty accepting the obverse, as well.

    • clever_sobriquet

      But the bible is true because the bible says it is true so the bible is true etc

      • Zippy

        the Bible is true because God wrote it

        God is real because the Bible says so

        Repeat ad infinitum

      • data_ninja

        It’s bibles, all the way down!

  • Left Coast Tom

    There is something in Texas called the Institute for Creation Research

    These turkeys used to be in Santee, CA. I wish I knew what CA did to drive them away so I could write my Assembly member and ask for more of it.

    • jmk

      I’m thinking taxes and a strong lack of the ability to discriminate against The Gheys and wimminz.

  • Poly_Ester

    “As Seen on TV”?

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      ScamWow!

    • willi0000000

      worse.

      it’s “similar to ‘as seen on TV'”

  • Everhope

    Jeeze, there, my lovely Wonkette, I really, really, really tried, I did, honestly, to listen to this stuff, but then I remembered it was only Tueseday and, alas, it’s too early in the week for Duggar/Christian dumbfuckery. I promise I’ll try again late tomorrow evening, cross my heart…hope to die!

    • Suse

      You forgot “stick a needle in my eye… boil in oil… stew in lye”

      • Everhope

        Oh, dear, does that mean I’ll have to listen to that crap on my day off from christian…well, you know what I mean.

  • Toomush_Infer

    I’m suppressing an urge to throw that bastard out of his wrongfully smug chair…

    • jmk

      You will have to get in line behind me…

  • Paperless Tiger

    They’re just in the wrong institute, that’s all.

  • Zippy

    Even most dogs eventually tire of going in circles chasing their own tails

    • Me not sure

      My pug hasn’t. Stupid dog!

      • RevZafod

        You’re slippin’, Mns. Back near the start Zippy said:
        “Werner Heisenberg on line two…”
        Everything snarkred demands that YOU, specifically, post a reply to that, on principle. And I’m certain about that.

        Let the Circle* be Unbroken,

        * jerk**
        ** I don’t mean you

        • Me not sure

          May I say that I’m reasonably unsure that you don’t?

          • RevZafod

            I think it’s safe to say that as long as we don’t look, it’s both true and untrue. BTW, if you haven’t seen it, watch the Coens’ A Serious Man a few times. The whole movie is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma as a comedy. Just brilliant! Like Lebowski, you see more layers every time.

          • Me not sure

            See it? Hell, I taught that movie in a film class for gifted H.S.ers. The Coens are my favorite
            contemporary filmmakers.
            BTW : If done right teaching truly is a subversive activity.

          • Blank Ron

            As it should be. Otherwise it’s just data entry.

          • Me not sure

            “Teaching as a Subversive Activity” was a formative book for me. I retired once I realized that the game was lost.

          • RevZafod

            Teaching subversive? No shit, in classes I taught on many subjects from 1968 until about 1998. And tho Lebowski is their great cult film [been Best Walter at three LebowskiFests], A Serious Man is IMNSFHO their deepest philosophical film. Life, the Universe, and Everything. Schorodinger, Heisenberg, and not just on the blackboards. Did Clive offer a bribe or not, for starters. Tons more. Yes/no conundrums. Entirely throughout, A Serious Man is a decent intro to Quantum Theory for Dummies and Smarties.

  • diogenez
  • Beaumarchais?

    “Taking Back Astronomy”—to a world of glass orbs surrounding the earth? Or is that still too sciency?

    • willi0000000

      they’re just afraid that one of the Voyager probes is going to crack the crystal sphere.

      [that’s why they want to defund NASA . . . except for that mission to retrieve the Voyagers and New Horizons before it’s too late]

  • Catstro

    Sr. Catstro just walked into the room and handed me a Corpse Reviver right as I was finishing this article. If I don’t exist how can I be getting drunk on my couch right now, huh? QED Duggerfuckers.

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    So I’m an atheist because of all the suppressed thetans? The more you know!

  • sundaytrucker

    If God can do anything, can he create a Duggar so dumb even he can’t reason with her?

    • Zippy

      Can he create one that isn’t born pregnant?

      • Toomush_Infer

        It’s turtles all the way down…

      • Virginia Dreaming

        Tribles are much cuter.

  • JohnnyZhivago2

    By this logic a devout Christian is just a repressed atheist.

  • trueblue

    “literally cannot even with these two” is becoming trite. Ugh.

  • blaid droog

    And yes, we can all have that drink now. fuck that shit. I had several drinks before I plunged into the abyss. also I was eating xanax like they were skittles,but that was just because I was drunk and kept reaching into the wrong candy bowl.

    • blaid droog

      also too the scientist had a nice Celestron. he must have it set so it can only see space as recent as 6000 years ago.

  • Rick Hill

    Much more easier assplaining religion if you use a chart…

    • Me not sure

      Why does my brain keep defaulting automatically to the bottom box?

      • BoatOfVelociraptors

        It’s like this thing, you know?

    • Zippy

      blackboard libul!!1!

  • Bitter Scribe

    How do you “research” Creation, anyway? Just look around and say, “Yup”?

    • Zippy

      great work if you can get it

      • Virginia Dreaming

        Love the BoDeans!

    • Steverino247

      Only have to read one book, too.

      • malsperanza

        Not that anyone reads the Bible. Short snippets suffice.

        • Sam Hain

          …and then you get to cherry pick the parts you like and ignore the rest, as if they don’t exist.

    • diogenez

      Savvy Google users can find photos.

  • Grokenstein

    So God exists because I shake my head and say “Jesus H. Christ” every single time I read this brand of nonsense. Ipso factless! Checkmate, atheists?

  • gullywompr

    It’s true, we don’t exist, but they haven’t got a clue why.

  • JVisconti

    I am totally not suppressing the truth that my lifespan is now 6 minutes shorter after that video

    • Me not sure

      Thanks. I now know that it would be a better use of my six minutes to go take a good long crap and start the crossword puzzle. You’re a real martyr on this one.

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    That Duggar girl is going to be a formidable force in shaping our scientific views, once she completes her PhD thesis on astrobiology!

  • Jared James

    Holy shit, what an imbecile.

    • jmk

      That’s about the size of it.

    • Wee Mousie

      Or, to put it another way.

      Wholly imbécile! What a shit.

  • Scooter

    Haha…I’m an atheist.

    “No you’re not. There’s no such thing as atheists. You actually believe in God. Resistance is futile. Muahahaha!!”

  • laineypc

    “Dr. Lisle can prove the existence of God because the Bible says he doesn’t even have to prove the existence of God, THE BIBLE SAYS!”

    The atheists/science-minded are soooo jealous that circular logic isn’t allowed in science.

    • Me not sure

      ….their merry-go-round never breaks down

      • Brother Yam

        Needs more toilet bowl

        • Me not sure

          ” Calliope Music”!

      • BoatOfVelociraptors

        Honestly, I’m just glad it’s not a goatse.

  • VandeGraf

    The existence of Duggars and in-laws is proof positive that God does not exist.

    • Zippy

      or that he’s drunk

      the platypus also proves that

      • MrBlobfish

        E Platypus Unim.

      • major_asshole

        The flamingo also proves this. How else would you explain an animal that pisses on its own leg?

        • Zippy

          haven’t been bar hopping in a university town lately, have you?

        • Msgr_Moment

          Two-for-one shot night?

      • Me not sure

        Truth from beyond the grave.

  • Vecciojohn

    I must have been out taking a whiz or really fucked up or something when He revealed Himself to me. You’d think I’d remember too, Him being God and all.

  • AllupinWard4

    Field trips to the Holocaust Museum are always fun… Remind me of the stories Onkel Horst used to tell about the lawn parties at the Big House at Bergen-Belsen when he was just a Nazichen.

  • MrBlobfish

    And here I thought it was a matter of faith, of which I have none.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      You’re only repressing your innner faithy faith, duh. The Bible sort of (not really) says so!

  • Steverino247

    Dear Shit for Brains…

    How I address letters to such persons.

    • Vecciojohn

      We used to joke about a form letter to clients that began, “Now listen here, goddamit.”

      • Steverino247

        I used to write reports for the court. Every so often, I would get called to testify about a report. I always wanted to respond to every question with “Didn’t you read my fucking report? The answer is on the very first page, you moron!”

  • Joshua Norton

    The evidence of God is ubiquitous, it’s everywhere.

    Santimonious AND self-righteous.

    I’m fainting here.

    • willi0000000

      brought to you by The Department of Redundancy Department.

      [ . . . in the most unique way possible]

      • Toomush_Infer

        Not the Redundancy Conundrum……Again!!!!?????….

      • Vecciojohn

        And made possible by a grant from the Foundation Foundation. “The Foundation Foundation: Working for the Foundation of More Foundations.”

        • willi0000000

          from the foundation up!

  • Fred Wertham, Jr.

    Just another tragic waste of a perfectly good white girl.

    • Vecciojohn

      Somehow, that phrase manages to capture the American zeitgeist in the Age of the Teabagger. I’m going to embroider it into a sampler and hang it over my shrine to Paris Hilton.

      • Fred Wertham, Jr.

        It also seems to be a phrase racists are fond of using in certain situations so I was little apprehensive about using it. But it seems so right.

  • Virginia Dreaming

    Okay here is some weird timing. I just popped over to twitter and saw a retweet of something from Celia W. Dugger, the nyt science editor. At first I thought it was a joke until I realized the spellings were different.

  • Vecciojohn

    Somehow this reminds me of this old chestnut:

    There once was a man who said: “God
    Must think it exceedingly odd
    If he finds that this tree
    Continues to be
    When there’s no one about in the Quad.”

    Dear Sir,
    Your astonishment’s odd;
    I am always about in the Quad;
    And that’s why the tree
    Will continue to be,
    Since observed by
    Yours faithfully,
    God.

    • Toomush_Infer

      Does the tree just fall over, then?….

      • Zippy

        very quietly

        • Vecciojohn

          Shhh, don’t wake Him up. He’s very cranky if He doesn’t get His nap.

    • Herasmus B. Lyon

      So, when a tree falls, does that mean God wasn’t watching?

      • Vecciojohn

        Either that or he got bored and knocked it over himself.

      • Wee Mousie

        He was too busy watching sparrows snuff it.

  • major_asshole

    So…Christian God is a paedophile then? Got it.

    I couldn’t read half of the block quote because I was developing a twitch in my right eye that foretold very bad things for my monitor. Jesus Christ, these people are stupid. Moving on!

    I’d like to ask people like “Dr.” Lisle (who I’m pretty sure has a PhD in theology, which is like a BFA in painting) how we’re all created in “God’s image,” but some of us have severe problems or missing organs or what have you. Answer that, and maybe we’ll discuss how we’re all in one giant incestuous relationship next.

    • FeloniousMonk

      Lisle has a PhD in astrophysics. He’s another example to show that impressive qualifications imply nothing beyond a narrow technical competence.

    • Wee Mousie

      God must have been looking into a Fun House mirror at the carnival when he made me, or possibly on coffee break,

  • Rick Hill

    Let me guess, reasoning like this presumes they grew up watching Kirk Cameron movies.

  • bargal20

    Yeah, but she is kinda hot, so she’s welcome to try to convince me.

    • Zippy

      careful there- she’s a classic Xtian honeypot. That poor kid she’s with probably didn’t believe half the goofy shit he now spouts, until he discovered that if you put a ring on her finger she gets to it like a bunny rabbit on crystal meth. Now he has Meatloaf’s Paradise by the Dashboard Light on infinite repeat on his iPod and has amassed an impressive razor blade collection

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        I think she always looks decidedly uncomfortable and sad in every photo with this dude she’s ever been in.

        edited for lack of a y.

      • bargal20

        Maybe there really are no atheists in her holes.

        • Fox holes?

          • bargal20

            You have to pay the troll toll to get inside that fox hole.

          • Zippy

            tithe before you writhe

        • Wee Mousie

          “Oh,God! Oh, God!! Oh, God!!!”

          “Did you say something?”

          “Excuse me, did I say that out loud?””

  • TheBidenator

    I just thank the FSM with its noodley appendage of righteousness that the Duggars are deep in the asscrack of America: Arkansas and nowhere near me. Oregon has our fair share of kooks and weirdos (the head of the Oregon GOP, Art Robinson REALLY wants your pee) but we have nothing along the lines of the dumb fucking Duggars or Fuckabee.

    • Anarchy Pony

      Art is a special kind of stupid. And I know exactly who is going to fema camp, because they all put Art Robinson signs in their yards.

      • TheBidenator

        Yeah but I love that the Oregon GOP picked him as their chair, have fun being in the political wilderness for another generation guys because that kind of crazy might work in Arizona but you’re so not in Arizona….

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Ok so, if you claim you do not believe in God, you really do, because God is everywhere and the Bible says something about how people who refuse God are actually suppressing their belief because of evil.

    Does that mean if you say you believe in God, you actually do not, because if denying God is suppression of God than acceptance of God is denial of God?

  • Rufus T. Firefly

    The evidence of Allah is ubiquitous, it’s everywhere.

    Try that one on for size, homeschoolers.

  • Rufus T. Firefly

    But the real theological issue is: Does God allow comments?

    • Zippy

      No, but the devil does

      • Well, duh…of course. We were all drawn her by the promise of Satanic discussion and snark.

        • Zippy

          and buttsechs

          • BoatOfVelociraptors

            Where would we be without some Cox and ass-fucking?

      • Anarchy Pony

        I still maintain he’s secretly the protagonist.

        • Zippy

          he needs a better PR team

          • Steverino247

            See: Pope, current.

          • Blank Ron

            ‘Any press is good press.’

  • Ergoetal

    Ben looks so much more smarter when he wears his big-boy glasses.

  • nightmoth

    Lessee—“Dr.” Lisle sez not only is there no such thing as an atheist, but those who claim to be are “suppressing the truth through unrighteousness.” My magic decoder ring translates that as “lying sinners.” New Pope sez, not only are some people atheists, but they can Still Go To Heaven! I know who I’d rather have a beer with.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      New Pope is like, cool and shit and at least trying to drag Christianity kicking and screaming out of the 13th century (although, he could reach for 21st century and not the 18th but I cut the guy a bit of slack due to the turtle pace the institution takes on everything).
      Unfortunately, he is probably headed for a short pontificate.

      • Steverino247

        When he starts burning pedophile priests and their enablers in St. Peter’s, I’ll pay attention. In the meantime, he’s just a good PR move.

        • Zippy

          Meh, he’s making progress, albeit frustratingly slowly. Even the babby steps he’s taken so far have ruffled enough official feathers that there’s now a good chance he could have an “accident” that would cut short his gig. It’s far from ideal, but I’ll still take moving in the right direction at a glacial pace over galloping in the wrong direction like those fuckers are wont to do

          • Blank Ron

            He’d hardly be the first pontiff who accidentally stabbed himself 25 times while washing his face in the Church’s glorious history.

  • Tony Alexander

    whew! glad to know i don’t exist anymore.

    now if i can only find a bunch of brainless rubes to start praisin’ and worshipin’ me, and all that happy horse shit!

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      If Atheists do not exist, do they have to pay taxes?

      • Wombat

        Don’t worry, Jen, The Man, especially the IRS, believes in you even if the Duggars don’t.

        • Wee Mousie

          It would make it more of a sporting proposition if the Duggars didn’t believe in paying their taxes.

  • Pat_Pending

    People like that are the reason I’m an atheist…

    • jmk

      Certainly, they’re one reason I’m an atheist… lack of evidence is the big one, though.

      • Pat_Pending

        I was willing to say ‘agnostic’ simply from the standpoint that NOBODY knows. But then Dubya got into the Presidency, and I said, ‘that’s it, I’m done.

        • Jamie

          Being an atheist doesn’t exempt anyone from being agnostic. I’m an agnostic atheist (The agnostic part is by default, I don’t usually declare it) Atheism just means you lack a belief in a god/gods. It doesn’t mean you are saying you believe the opposite. It isn’t an assertion that ‘there is no god’ just to not believe in one. Most atheists will agree that if you give them a shred of legit, tangible evidence that any god at all of any kind actually existed, they would happily accept it. The difference if you’re still not getting it is like this: Three people: One believes Two is guilty of a crime. Three looks on, but doesn’t (just) believe Two is guilty of a crime. That doesn’t mean that Three believes that Two is innocent. It just means he isn’t on the ‘he’s guilty’ boat. And yes, there can be atheists, and others of other beliefs or lack thereof, who claim there is no god. But that is a different matter entirely.

          • Boscoe

            The big problem I have is that the Atheist definition of “God” always seems to be the default man-made Christian prefab one. I hear too many proclamations of Atheism that are based entirely on Bible = stoopid. And then they say stupid things like: “are you ‘agnostic’ about Zeus? How about the Spaghetti Monster? hyuck hyuck” And then sprain their shoulder patting themselves on the back for how smrt they are.

            -As if the point HAS to be in relation to a man-made concept. Which to me is as tinyminded as saying that book has all the answers and is self-evident proof that it’s all true.

            I am able to imagine concepts bigger, more complex, subtle, incomprehensible and surprising than giant abusive anger-issues sky dad and his sacrificed hippie son whose teachings his followers ignore…

          • Anarchy Pony

            That’s just waaay too nuanced.

          • BoatOfVelociraptors

            I prefer apathetic agnosticism. I don’t know, I don’t care.

          • Lizzietish81

            Please, let’s not start arguing between Atheism and Agnosticism, it’s like watching Pro Anorexia and Pro Bulimia girls get into a fight.

        • Vecciojohn

          Or the Almighty has just developed a sadistic sense of humor in his old age. Call it malicious design.

          • Pat_Pending

            see above, vis a vis Dubya and Presidency.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      I am not an atheist and even I find these people straining my desire to meet the Almighty.

      Cause I really do not want to share heaven with people who hate. It just seems wrong, somehow. Maybe there is a special haters heaven?

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        Yes, it’s called Arkansas.

        • Zippy

          I was going to say Breitbart

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Breitbart is more haters hell than haters heaven. The folks there are some seriously afraid-of-everything/ terrified to live sorts. That so sounds like every description of hell I have ever heard that I thus so dub it.

        • Jen_Baker_VA

          Poor Arkansas :( They need some rainbows and kittens there and maybe they will stop the hatin’ stuffs that hippy with the red texts kept yammerin on about

      • Pat_Pending

        I was thinking we could round ’em all up and put ’em in FEMA camps. Oh, wait…

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        This is not going to be a problem. No matter how you look at it.

        • Boscoe

          ..and that’s why it’s all beautiful in the end. :)

      • Vecciojohn

        Well, you know the old joke about the guy being shown around heaven by St. Peter. They pass through a long hallway full of people moaning and crying and praying for forgiveness of their sins and rending their flesh. “Is this really heaven?” the guy asks. “Shhh,” says St. Peter. “This is Baptist heaven. If they knew about the centuries-long orgies and the drug binges the rest of us indulge in it would spoil their fun.”

        • Vienna Woods

          Presbyterians, also, too.

          • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

            Church of Christ, too – that is one Mean SOAB those people believe in

            DAMN!

          • Blank Ron

            In lieu of a video I leave y’all this:

            http://www.madmusic.com/song_details.aspx?SongID=4443

          • Vienna Woods

            Oh, I love the Frantics!

          • Blank Ron

            I think we’re required to by law.

    • Me not sure

      ….that and lack of a god.

    • Me not sure

      ….that and lack of a god.

  • diogenez

    Fab

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    The easiest way to tie these Xtard nimrods in knots is to point out that ALL they have is an old book of bronze-age fairy tales, which for some reason they choose to believe, and there’s no way they can “prove” squat without leaning on the book for one “fact” or another. Soooner or later, guaranteed, you’ll snag them with “nope – you’re leaning on that old book again.”
    This dolt makes it too easy: the first words out of his mouth are “the Bible says…”
    “And why would you believe that?”
    “Because it’s the word of God.”
    “And how do you know that?”
    “Because it says so in the Bible.”
    “BZZZZT. Thanks for playing.”

    • Wombat

      Pretty sure “tautology” is a bit too big of a word for these folks.

    • Blank Ron

      I’ve tried that. The second you catch ’em out they put on a superior smirk and say something like, ‘You wouldn’t understand because you’re a non-believer’ and walk away. For them a retreat is the same as a win.

  • chascates

    What about the Muslims? Is Allah the same as God or Satan in disguise? Is the Dalai Lama condemned to Hell? Why did God wait so long to send Jesus to die for everyone’s sins? Including the sins people haven’t committed yet because they haven’t been born yet. And if Jesus died for our sins doesn’t that mean we don’t have to do anything about it? And why does God allow good looking girls to be so full of shit? And . . .

    • Vecciojohn

      Shut up and eat your dinner.

  • Tony Alexander

    “when we look into the universe, we immediately recognize it’s the handiwork of God”

    you do realize, (ahem) “doctor” lisle, that this means god owns all of the bad shit too?

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      I asked a priest about that once. I said what about super novas? Does God do the super novas? And he said yes. So I asked, what about when our star goes Super Nova and destroys the earth? Is that part of God’s plan? And he told me, no lie, to not worry about such things since they weren’t going to happen for a few billion years anyway.
      He also told me he would not sign me in for Latin since I was never going to be a priest and so would never use it. Eh

    • r m reddicks

      free will libel.

  • “And in fact, Romans I tells us that God has revealed himself to everyone. ”

    He may be right. Unfortunately, God’s marketing department is definitely dropping the ball with the folks they tagged to spread the word of god. Frankly, they’re making him look like a douchebag.

    • TootsStansbury

      GOD IS A FLASHER!!!!1!11!!!!

      • r m reddicks

        Damn! I’m two hours behind everything!

        • BoatOfVelociraptors

          Don’t worry. ’round these part, the view from the rear ain’t too bad.

  • malsperanza

    According to a humongous new research report from Pew, 25% of Americans identify as Evangelical Protestant. Only 20% identify as mainline Protestant.

    The good news (or Good News) is that the number of Americans who identify as Christian is declining rapidly. Pew speculates that this may be due to the increasing politicization of Christianity in the US.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      That damned dude with the red text was very specific about not involving yourself in politics, but instead using good deeds to speak for you.
      Kinda hard to keep your faithful when you are contradicting the very central figure of your entire religion.

      • malsperanza

        Unless you believe, as most Evangelicals do, that the central figure is St. Paul.

    • r m reddicks

      Fucking Obama and his Benghazi shoes.

  • Relativicus

    Their eyes, I can see straight through them!

  • MrBlobfish

    I made it 0:13 seconds into that video. Now I want to punch something.

  • Gristle McThornbody
  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Jesus…only Tuesday and I’m already up for a night of moral preening. I’ll bring the beer and chips…

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    So, I should be having an existential crisis now, right? Because I look in the mirror, and I still see myself. But this guy says I don’t exist.

    #ihazaconfuz

    • Vecciojohn

      Who you gonna believe? This cracker-ass bible-thumping inbred security guard-school drop out or your lying eyes?

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Also? I’m tired of Duggar babies (that’s a lie). I want my Wonkette baby already.

  • Esteban Rey

    Its presuppositionalism. All the rage right now among evangelicals. It boils down to believing that you know what other people think and know because God has revealed it to you.

    • Zippy

      AKA I’m a member of an exclusive club and you’re not

      • Esteban Rey

        Actually you are also part of the club, and I KNOW that you are lying when you say that you are not in it. This is why they refer to “professed” atheists. We all believe in god, but deny it because we just wanna sin.

        Seeing these people “debate” is incredibly tiresome. Their tactic is repeatedly interrupting with questions like “Do you KNOW that? How do you KNOW it?”

        They are infantile.

        • Steverino247

          You misspelled “ASSHOLES.”

        • BoatOfVelociraptors

          Is there a German word for “face that needs a bag of psilocybin”?

    • Vecciojohn

      It’s the evangelicals’ version of false consciousness.

    • cheetojeebus

      actually, what it boils down to is horse shit.

      • vivian

        beer out nose ftw

    • Blank Ron

      If God really told them what we’re thinking, about them, they’d run away screaming.

  • Boscoe

    GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!1!!1!111

    • Vecciojohn

      Well, of course a lot of people have that reaction when first exposed to the Duggars. The paralysis usually wears off after 18 hours.

    • cheetojeebus

      Looks like you’ve fried your gaydar. What you may need to do is watch some old Gomer Pyle episodes and maybe a few gladiator movies and you should be good. Just needs a little reset.

  • JoeChristmas

    Especially when that god is Allah. Praise be his holy name.

    • Duggernetics: The Biblical Science Of Maternal Health

  • SK

    “What are you a doctor of, Mr. Lisle?”

    • Vecciojohn

      I do not like thee, Dr. Lisle,
      You’re creepy as a pedophile,
      I can’t quite tell why you’re so vile,
      But I do not like thee, Dr. Lisle.

  • Rick Hill

    Do we know gawd in the biblical sense? Must be because what other sense can gawd be known in. And that means everyone knows gawd and, ergo, gawd is a real tramp.

    • Vecciojohn

      He works in mysterious ways His sexual favors to perform.

      • Beaumarchais?

        Hence, our passionate cries during coitus!

        • Vienna Woods

          Certainly the only time I pray.

  • Fly

    Hell is other people telling me I believe in god.

    • Vecciojohn

      Jean-Paul Sartre’s famous remark was actually mistranslated. When he really said is “Hell is the Duggars.”

      • BoatOfVelociraptors

        Hell is …
        *hic*
        Hell is like that…..
        *hic*
        The hell was I ‘talkin bout?

        • Vecciojohn

          ‘swhat I said . . . The summabish. . . Mrrf.

    • cheetojeebus

      ftw

  • SprayedMilkOutMyNose

    Wait a second here…If an atheist laughs out loud after reading this article…can he hear himself…?

  • Anarchy Pony

    I don’t exist, even though I do. Does that make me like Sithis?

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      *un-fastens the support to a moose head*

      • Anarchy Pony

        Ooh, oblivion reference.

  • Joseph

    She better give good head because as far as I can tell that would be the only reason to feed her. I might let her sleep in the kitchen if she would not speak.

  • TootsStansbury

    These are people who can cover theirselves in a blanket and become invisible.

  • janecita

    Oh my fucking God, I don’t exist!!!! I’m freaking out really bad right now!!!

    • Zippy

      calm down, the shrooms will wear off in a few hours. Just don’t tell people about the shapes you see in the clouds and don’t give in to the temptation to drive to the liquor store right now

      • Vecciojohn

        Too late.

      • janecita

        Damm, now I’m craving acid! God, I miss college!

        • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

          Melting walls – way fun stuff.

    • Steverino247

      Like, totally…

      • janecita

        Dude, you totally get me

    • r m reddicks

      You beat me to this. But I don’t exist so I didn’t type this.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      What you have to remember is the spoon doesn’t exist.

      • Zippy

        don’t worry about the vase…

  • Bear OmNomNom

    I think, therefore I am.
    I think about the Duggars, therefore I drink.
    I think about Duggars sechsing, therefore I drink Drano.

    • Vecciojohn

      Another tragic death caused by the Duggars. When will the madness end?!?!

    • I’m not sure if there is a Dog.
      ~

      • JEinSJ

        I lie awake nights wondering about this.

        • Smibo

          Lysdexic, huh?

          • JEinSJ

            Yeh, and the inosmia really is tough, too.

      • TheBidenator

        I don’t have a dog anymore…..

        • Donna Rail

          You can adopt one. :)

  • BMW

    So I don’t really have to give new evidence to a professing atheist. All I have to do is expose his suppressed knowledge of God, because you see, in Romans I again, it tells us that the reason that unbelievers profess, you know, they say there’s no God, et cetera et cetera, it’s not because they don’t know Him, it’s because they’re suppressing the truth in unrighteousness. The Bible says.

    Circular argument is circular. And barely and argument.

  • Vecciojohn

    Non cogito, ergo . . . Uh oh.

    • Blank Ron

      Rene Descartes walks into his favourite bar. Bartender asks, ‘The usual, M. Descartes?’ Rene says, ‘Hmm, I think not,’ and vanishes.

      • Zyxomma

        The Higgs boson walks into a Catholic church. The priest spots it, and says, “Get out of here! No Higgs particles allowed!!” The Higgs boson replies, “But … but … without ME, you can’t have MASS.”

      • Zippy

        Immanuel Kant walks into a bar, except he doesn’t- because space and time are merely an illusory construct of pure intuition

      • bobbert

        Bartender says: “We don’t serve superluminal particles here.”
        A tachyon walks into a bar.

  • Incoming Ham

    Their eyes are windows to empty shells of human beings.

  • smitallica

    Pssst, “doctor:” Asking someone to prove the existence of God is actually NOTHING AT ALL like asking a fish to prove the existence of water. It is more like asking a fish to prove the existence of an all-knowing, all-powerful, sky-dwelling, invisible superfish that will send all the fish to some hot, dry island if they don’t believe everything written by older, stupider fish on some fucking kelp.

    • Zippy

      not to mention, I’m a little leery of people who think they can talk to fish

      • TheBidenator

        Yeah, I’d hate to think the scream on the way down the gullet….it would put me off fish for life.

    • Vecciojohn

      Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science, Sir Knight?

    • Sharkey

      You can laugh, but I know one that actually did.

  • DahBoner


    it’s because they’re suppressing the truth in unrighteousness.

    Shorter Duggar-in-law Ben Seewald and his little lady Jessa:

    Get this shit away from me, it makes too much sense!!!! 1!1!

    http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2014-07/18/10/enhanced/webdr06/anigif_enhanced-buzz-26841-1405694334-4.gif

    • r m reddicks

      Are all labs left-handed?

      • jmk

        I need a litter of Labrador puppies and a grant to study this question NOW!!

        Best. Research. Ever.

        • r m reddicks

          Keep an eye out for the fedex truck. Show your work!

          • jmk

            YAY PUPPIES!!!

    • TheBidenator

      Awww….check out the pupper, reminds me of mine, what a moran for sticking an open flame into a dog’s face by the way.

    • Anarchy Pony

      I just love the way it looks all indignant when it whacks the plate. “Get this outta my fuckin’ face!”

    • Enfant Terrible

      A nice flank steak or GTFO!!!

  • Helena Handbag

    Good ole Logic 101. There’s a term for what he did there…pleading with the question?no that’s not it…panhandling the question, right? no..hmm buggering the question I think. Oh, hell I don’t even exist and comments aren’t allowed even if I did.

    • teddy21

      begging the question?

      • BethG

        A logical fallacy in the realm of debate/proof, which he purported to do before bowing out because BIBLE.

    • BethG

      How ironic, given that he apparently wrote a book regarding logical fallacies! I counted 7. The big one front and center being MORAL HIGH GROUND. Fuck this wanker.

  • teddy21

    Is that Duggar chick bangable? I’m trying to picture her in Kardashian clothes and a nose ring.

    • Sassamaphone

      duct tape over mouth, bingo!

    • r m reddicks

      Now I have to drink some more.

  • Vecciojohn

    And us “atheists” would have gotten away with it too, if not for those meddlesome Duggars kids.

    • TheBidenator

      The Duggars and the Palins ride around in the “Mystery Stretched Hummer-mobile” solving mysteries such as, “Why don’t people like Sarah Palin” (obviously Obama’s fault), and “Who drank all the wine coolers?” (Barstool er Bristol) and the real mystery, okay who impregnated drunken Barstool, er Bristol this time?

  • Wee Mousie

    There is a penalty for marrying Duggar offspring. They come with a clown car full of the dumbest in-laws you’d ever wish to lock the doors against and hide in the cellar until they go away.

    • Enfant Terrible

      Another penalty – at Thanksgiving dinner, you’d better move quickly if you want something besides a spoonful of stuffing and a few cranberries on your plate. With 19 siblings and extended family looking to get fed, that turkey is GONE before you know it.

      • Wee Mousie

        Thanksgiving> You only celebrate Thanksgiving if you can keep your feet out from under a Duggar table.

  • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

    Screw booze.

    Gimme drugs.

    Real drugs.

    Not toothache medicine crap – REAL drugs.

  • Sam Hillis

    This is discouraging for any hope that this world has a reasonable future.

  • iyamtoo

    Tautological. Fucking learn it. Jackasses.

  • r m reddicks

    I had to start drinking somewhere short of halfway through. Of course and ellipse.

  • Slinger

    Shouldn’t these two be procreating their collective empty skulls shitless, instead of commenting on ANYTHING !

    • Rick Hill

      They are responsible, young republicans. they won’t start a family until they are able to make enough on the grift train to support children.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      They are still trying to figure that part out. Imagine their disappointment when they discovered this was not the Institute for Procreation Research. The search goes on.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Considering what both sets of parents told them about sex, they may still be figuring that part out.

      Maybe we could start a pool on how many years into the marriage Ben figures out how to give Jessa her first orgasm.

      • Anarchy Pony

        Rub this part in that part, it’s not rocket science.

      • Zippy

        Put me down for sometime after the seventh kid and about a year before her uterus falls out- double or nothing, it’ll be a complete accident and likely involve the Maytag and an unbalanced load of diapers

  • Logic of Color

    “So I don’t really have to give new evidence…”

    How convenient.

  • cousin itt

    I’ve looked at the good doctor’s science bone fides. He’s a legit astrophysicist. From his blog http://www.jasonlisle.com/2012/11/09/deep-time-the-god-of-our-age/

    Consider (1) Deep Time has characteristics and powers that belong to God alone. In fact, the parallels are truly amazing! For example, Deep Time has the power of creation. According to His followers, he has made stars, planets, and galaxies. He has made canyons, and mountains. Deep Time separated the continents and oceans. He has made all living creatures through his servant – Evolution. Indeed, Deep Time took the elements of this world, and from that dust he made man. These are all powers and actions that are rightly reserved for God alone (Nehemiah 9:6, Psalm 33:6, Job 38:4, Psalm 104:5-8, Genesis 1:9-10, Genesis 1:20-25, Genesis 2:7).

    Does Jason really think scientists think that way? He’s not ignorant of radioactive decay, he just thinks his god can do whatever the hell he wants. Understanding plasma physics is itself just a complex problem to understand. Like a Rubik’s Cube or why the Cubs always suck. Jason has a gift. A gift he shares with some of the most “brilliant” and some of the most “evil” people the world has ever known. He can solve problems but cannot construct the meaning of his life without appeal to larger powers beyond his control, making himself the ultimate victim.

    • Dee Andee

      This wanker gawdsplains almost as well as Sen. Elbert Guillory of Louisiana.

    • Zippy

      C’mon, everybody knows the Cubbies suck because of that damned Billy goat- nothing complex about that…

    • Paperless Tiger

      The Greek time god was Cronus, who et his own children, a metaphor for time. The Romans conflated him with Saturn, god of the underworld, and probably the prototype for Satan, same MO and similar name. The sin of Satan was impersonating God. Evidently he’s still at it.

    • Zyxomma

      Silly doctor. Everyone knows the great goddess Kali Ma created the universe, all by herself. She was first worshiped in Nepal (poor Nepal, another 7.3 earthquake), and then incorporated into the Hindu pantheon as the wife of Shiva. I own a great statue of her, with lots of heads.

  • DarthwingDuck

    So being an epistemic agnostic, I am unable to know whether I exist or not, and, furthermore, the question of my existence or non-existence is semantically empty.

    No wonder I am so damned depressed all the time.

    • frambley1

      Or so you thought! Until the smart bible guy learnt you that you are just repressing your own knowledge of the God. Whew, I’m glad we don’t have to worry about thought making anymore.

      • DarthwingDuck

        Well, it was all that thought making that got me out of Biblewingnutistan in the first place, which was a long painful process.

    • ohpaleasegivemeabreak

      If you only knew what you know you knew that you know, you’d know that you knew it all along and then you’d never be depressed.

      • Zippy

        isn’t that an Edie Brickell song?

      • handyhippie65

        huh? i don’t know, what i don’t know, so how can i know?

        • Smibo

          Just ask Donald Rumsfeld.

    • Vecciojohn

      Philosophy student: But professor, isn’t it true that you can doubt everything but the fact of your doubting?

      Philosophy professor: Who’s asking?

    • BoatOfVelociraptors

      You’re a zero length array.

  • BloviateMe

    I’m not A Theist, I am The Theist!

    Wait, I don’t think that works. Damn you prefixes, how you frustrate me!!!

    • Zippy

      the theist was Paul

      Goo goo g’ joob

  • TheBidenator

    Jason Lyle has a doctorate?!? The dumb Duggars don’t depress me because they are the idiotic womb fruit from a couple of super fundie morans, but Dr. Lyle…depresses me a little. Here I am about to embark on the blood, sweat and tears of my master’s degree and a guy who argues with all of the authority of Elias in “Clerks 2” has a doctorate?!? I hope it’s one of those fake theology doctorates like Huckleberry has and if not there is a serious problem in higher education that no net strained this guy out….

    • cousin itt

      PhD from CU Boulder. And that was before the legal weed.

      • TheBidenator

        That is really depressing, I thought CU was a good school, too. I’m guessing he’s not mentioned as a famous alumni when wooing students…what discipline is the PhD in?

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Astrophysics. Since he seems to have gone from there directly to Creationism, he apparently lied his ass off about his thoughts on what he was studying the whole time. Christians call that integrity.

          • Zippy

            when Xtians lie for Jebus it’s called integrity.

            when Muslins lie for Allah, the Xtians demand that we nuke their country into the stone age

    • I have a PhD from ULC, it cost me $100 and about a weekend’s worth of work. Ain’t the internet grand?

    • I’ve known young-earth creationists with legit PhDs in biochemistry. What you need to get a PhD is research skills and persistence. Nothing about not having demented delusionary views of the world.

  • The Postman

    So I’m wondering how I’m much
    meth I would need to consume before any of this would begin to make sense. Probably all of it.

  • TootsStansbury

    Derp. These windows are delicious!

  • Enfant Terrible

    Circular reasoning AND amateur psychology! An unbeatable combination. We may as well give him our lunch money.

  • Walter Wellstone

    I gots your hardwire right here…

  • ryp

    Dr. Lisle hasn’t figured out how to read his Bible to reveal the Secret Bible where it says something else entirely about God. Which is a secret.

  • [img]https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/e7/c3/10/e7c3100e5f304f44b9833a3b23822f5c.jpg

  • I didn’t think families with 20 kids existed.

    http://www.TheLibCrib.com

    • BadKitty904

      Outside the Book of Genesis…

    • zerosumgame0005

      some times I gotta just feel sorry for some vagina’s…

    • ButchWagstaff

      I had a great uncle & aunt who had 15 kids. If they had lived for another 20 years & had 5 more, they could have had their own tv show. I’d like to think it would have been called “20 Wagstaffs & Waiting”.

    • jmk

      If every one of my grandmother’s pregnancies had worked out, she’d have had something like 22 kids. As it was, they had 14, and while they certainly rated their own zip code (and they had a pay phone installed in the kitchen because phone bills were unbearable), they were not the biggest family in town.

      Pre-Vatican II Catholics and a cold master bedroom…a bad combo.

  • BadKitty904

    That boy has a fairly impressive brow-ridge. Take it away, Kinky…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lYxzwev4OM

    • zerosumgame0005

      Is that one one of them “sexxytime inyourendos”? how DARE you do that when we’s a speaking bout a gaaaaaaaaaaaaawd fearin’ man!

    • Vecciojohn

      Ray Benson is God.

  • katydid13

    I was kind of hoping they had discovered the theory of universal salvation, which basically says, that God probably won’t send anyone who lives like the commonly accepted definition of moral person (pretty much treating other people well, not murdering, that kind of thing) will mostly likely end up in heaven (although we can’t count on it.) I knew it was way too good to be true for a Duggar, but you can hope.

    This of course would result in many atheists in heaven and some professional “Christians” in hell. I like the image of Jerry Fallwell and Pat Robertson trying to figure out how they are in hell, which heaven has many secular humanists.

  • elvigy

    I don’t see that anyone’s mentioned it, but Dok Zoom seriously needs to use that “Taking Back Astronomy” book for his next series. Like really. That has got to have comedy gold in it.

    • Anarchy Pony

      Really anything in the vein of sundays with the christianists,

  • dimplasm

    Okay, something good out of Arkansas:

    http://www.arktimes.com/ArkansasBlog/archives/2015/05/12/eureka-springs-votes-overwhelmingly-to-keeps-its-nondiscrimination-ordinance

    Add to that Pulaski County (Little Rock) is advancing anti-discrimination legislation, Hot Springs in Garland county, and rallies all over the damn state. Sorry Duggars, no one wants your hate and ignorance. Not even in Arkansas.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Awesome, and it wasn’t even close!

    • Vecciojohn

      I want a hat like that.

      • dimplasm

        It’s the Hogwarts of Arkansas.

        • Vecciojohn

          So actual hog warts, huh?

          • dimplasm

            Why not? If it gets you a hat…

          • Zippy

            Hogzilla!

        • SK

          Figures, they take leave of their wits from Platform 1/2

        • SK

          Figures, they take leave of their wits from Platform 1/2

    • Dee Andee

      There are (thankfully) little pockets of decency even in the shittiest states (like South Dakota, where I am). It’s nice to see that once in awhile our voices aren’t shouted down by bigots and ignoramuses. Thanks for sharing that. :-)

  • Celtic_Gnome

    You know, I don’t give a flying fuck what anyone else believes. There’s a reason that’s the first thing addressed in the Bill of Rights. Go out and find like-minded people to hang out with and reinforce each other’s beliefs. It’s your right. Where we have a problem is when these folks try to pass laws that force everyone to acknowledge that their beliefs are correct.

    Go pay homage to whatever you perceive your sky wizard to be with others who share that same perception, but leave me (and, by implication, everyone else who doesn’t accept your view of your sky wizard) alone to live our lives.

    Oh, and since you believe that you also have the right to tell me I’m going to spend eternity rotting in hell for my disbelief (not exactly neighborly of you), I also have the right to tell you that everyone you believe is nonsense.

    • E.A. Blair

      Actually, that’s the third thing in the bill of rights. The original bill had twelve amendments. The first dealt with congressional apportionment – the number of citizens a member of the house represents – and the second dealt with congressional pay raises. What we now call the first amendment was actually the third. The second amendment which was proposed on 25 September 1789, was finally ratified on 7 May 1992 (after 202 years, 225 days)as the twenty-seventh amendment. The original first amendment is still pending. We should hope, however, that it never will be passed, because if it does, the size of the House of Representatives will be increased to some 6,172 members.

  • Arcturus84

    I admit, I drank my whiskey early.

    • Candy Apple

      There’s a shot of tequila trying to woo me.

  • handyhippie65

    oooOOOooo, i don’t exist. i’m a fig-men-tay-shun of my mag-i-nation. duz that meen i’m an imaginary friend like drop ded fred?

  • Amy!

    Azh nazg durbataluk
    Azh nazg gimbatul
    Azh nazg thrakataluk
    Agh burzum ishi krimpatul!

    • handyhippie65

      black speech is quite fitting here. they’re just a couple steps from orcs.

      • Snownova

        They definitely breed like them.

        • Tolkien didn’t go into detail about how Orcs bred. Something like “eh, kind of like humans and Elves, let’s not think about it too much”.

          • E.A. Blair

            Tolkien only referred to orcs “multiplying”. In one of the appendices, he refers to them having been “…made in mockery of men,” and that the Uruk-Hai and trolls bore a similar relation to elves and ents. The movie had a scene that pointed to orcs being artificial rather than born creatures.

          • jmk

            Imma go full nerd here, but I think the deal was that they were “made” by Morgoth by twisting either those Avari who were lost in the darkness at Cuivienen, or men who didn’t make it to Beleriand. I’m not sure that Tolkien ever really nailed it down.

            I think the movie got it very wrong on that score – I forget where it was, but Tolkien wrote that orcs had life and reproduced “after the manner of the Children of Iluvatar,” and the trilogy is full of references to “half-orcs” like the southerner the hobbits saw with Bill Ferny at Bree and to many of the host at Helm’s Deep and Isengard.

            And yes, as a matter of fact, I am a complete and utter dork.

          • NorthernSaber

            I am standing at attention and proudly saluting such a full-throated celebration of nerd-dom. You, sir/ma’am, have attained the “next level” and I congratulate you on such encyclopedic knowledge. Hoo-YAH!!!

          • jmk

            (*blush*) Thank you. It’s what I do.

          • timpundit

            You write “dork” like its a bad thing somehow.

          • jmk

            I certainly didn’t mean to give that impression… aside from the sheer satisfaction of knowing stuff, my dorkiness delights my beloved and embarrasses my offspring… so… WIN!

          • timpundit

            I think that was just the Urak Hai, that were somehow “made” by Saruman, wasn’t it? The Mordor orcs and the goblins from Moria were free-range, organic orcs.

    • BeliTsari

      ( ) All the doo-dah day?
      ( ) Burmashave?
      ( ) Up Saron’s ass, where the sun don’t shine?
      ( ) Sez WHO!
      ( ) Kin ahy gits me uh a-MEN?

  • JVisconti

    field tripping in Texas? One would think Jessa would be confined to a birthing bed by now.

  • Zippy

    I can’t wait until the Duggars meet the Nauglers

    • Mehmeisterjr

      In a sense they have met the Nauglers and they are them.

  • hipsteriac

    How come I don’t have to watch this three times and look up all the long words to know it’s a load of shit?

  • Mehmeisterjr

    I think, therefore I am not a Duggar.

    • E.A. Blair

      Cogito ergo cogito sum

      — Ambrose Bierce

      Coito ergo sum

      — Vaughn Bode

      • elviouslyqueer

        Cogito ergo cumbucket

        –Jessa Duggar, yesterday

  • Smibo

    Well, in Ben’s defense, she is kinda cute. Can’t blame him for wanting to make 19 little Seewalds, especially given the probability of getting their own “reality” show…

    • actor212

      She just needs to shut up and keep shaking hands with my short leg.

  • Alex Grey

    I haven’t existed since I was 16, (and became an atheist,) I had no idea!

  • Alex Grey

    While we are quoting the Bible… From that picture, it sure looks like Ben Seewald shaves his beard, which is forbidden, Leviticus 21:5. Those comfortable outfits they are wearing in the picture, I bet they are made of mixed fabrics, as is also forbidden in Leviticus 19:19. Also it looks like Jessa is wearing men’s clothing, which is an abomination to the Lord, Deuteronomy 22:5; and it certainly doesn’t look like “modest apparel,” as required in 1 Timothy 2:9.

    • Kimberly

      I love this artist

      • misscellaneous

        Who is it? KInda looks like Usagi guy – Sakai?

  • Trippin McZoink

    Proving once again that what a superstitious fool believes is irrelevant.

  • Yes yes, that bit of morality that keeps me from going full duck dynasty on hapless victims is in reality a strong belief in a magical sky fairy, and not just an abhorrence of violence and wrong doing. Treating others as you would be treated is only the sleeping god in my head , and this guy, yeah this guy, is gonna awaken it so I can call it not my own conscience but god. Great. Carry on Christian solider, carry on.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    God has … hardwired us to know wish that he exists.

    FIFY, asshat.

  • actor212

    I’ve dated cheerleaders from vo-tech schools that had more going on behind their eyes than this piece of shit.

  • Lizzietish81

    Come on guys, all this talk of philosophy and no one whips this out (fun story, I took a philosophy class in college and all I could remember was during talks about Kant, my mind would instantly start this song)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_WRFJwGsbY

  • Antonin Dvorak

    “Dr.” Jason Lisle.

    FTFY.

  • sillyclucker

    Dumb and Dugger

    • misscellaneous

      For the win!

  • A Big Sarcastic Fairy!

    That gene pool has done burned out.

  • SpaceCaptainWarlock

    No, silly. Atheists don’t exist because bananas fit in our hands. Duh.

  • elviouslyqueer

    It is waaaaaay too early in the day for this shit.

  • misscellaneous

    Xtians like these bozos always say Athiests have no morality. Guess God blew it then, huh?

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    If we don’t exist, why do they keep talking about us?

    Also, every proselytizing missionary can stop right now. Just deliver the food and vaccines and STFU knowing your job is done.

  • JohnR

    God exists because the bible says so and the bible is literal truth, also that guy has a telescope behind him so he must know what he’s talking about, or he’s a peeper. What a bunch of mindless drivel.

  • JohnR

    Listening to these two explain Atheism is worse than Bill O’Reilly writing porn.
    The stupid, it burns!

  • JohnR

    A favorite clip of mine. http://bit.ly/1QJj1Aj

  • BackDoorMan

    … this article… I just can’t even…

  • Candy Apple

    You’re right, Preacher. I’ve been saying I’m an atheist, but it’s just because I’ve been in denial. There IS a God, and his name is Odin. He brought the runes to humankind, and you can see them to this very day. That proves He is real, it is just science. Praise Odin!!

  • Panther

    This site sucks.

    • Hardly Ideal

      I know you are, but what am I?

      • Panther

        A negro?

        • Hardly Ideal

          Damn, how did you know?? Maybe it was from that photo from the time I fetched the Ban Hammer for God Empress Editrix, May She Reign Forever?

          • Panther

            Ya what ever.

          • jmk

            Your wit, it’s AMAZING!!

          • dshwa

            But but but It’s always worked with his fellow 2nd graders before.

    • timpundit

      Yeah , it’ll never last.

      • Panther

        I just realized it is all females. No wonder.

        • timpundit

          Females, males, in between. Were all inclusive here, but you are our first leaded-paint poison victim. Welcome!

          • Panther

            No males unless they are gay. This is a womans site.

          • timpundit

            So which are you? You’re here.

          • Panther

            Neither. Later negro.

          • timpundit

            I’ve never heard of a later negro before, Marnie. What is that?

          • Panther

            Later, negro.

          • timpundit

            Autism is a treatable condition. FYI.

          • anniegetyerfun

            Are you suggesting anal bleaching for this guy?

          • jmk

            Anal bleaching might hurt what few brains he possesses.

      • Hardly Ideal

        I like how the comment activity is “private”. I guess it’d be bad policy for Disqus to say “shameful” instead.

    • Candy Apple

      Something something SO’S YOUR FACE!!1!!1!

  • timpundit

    As is the case with people like Palin, Ingram, Geller, Gohmert and Grace, I refuse to torture my ears by subjecting them to the noises that come out of these people’s heads.

  • geraldshields

    Not to say that a creator doesn’t exist, but you can’t prove God’s existence judging by these the crazy arguments these guys pose. To be honest, I believe that God exists, but I concede I can’t prove it. Sometimes That’s what faith is ; beilef without proof. Sorry folks, but it is what it is.

  • Redgyal

    yawn

  • Doug Williams

    fucking idiots!

  • maccamcfc

    What utter bollocks

  • xandercade

    I am ashamed to live on the same planet as these sad people. This whole argument that they know god exists because they see him in everything around him, it the flimsiest most unproven shit ever and I just walk away the moment a Christian uses it.

  • Sephia8

    Whew! Harry Potter is REAL! And Godzilla, 50 shades of Grey insanity, Horton really DID hear a Who, and the Grinch really DID steal Christmas!!

    Good to know everything in books is real and true because it was written, it is so!

    /end sarcasm/

  • Sephia8

    The Christian logic is about the same as Pathological Liar logic!

  • Bob Harrow

    Never question. 2all beef paties special sauce letuce cheeze pickles…. god musta made it.

  • Santana999

    That video made my liver bleed.

    And shouldn’t Ben be home filling his wife’s quiver? Suppose the stork comes while they are away?

  • r m reddicks

    Being hetero I’d give some thought to spooning with that bitch. The one on the left. I’ll be sorry later. If not now.

    • r m reddicks

      On further reflection, I withdraw my spooning proposition.

  • Kipco

    I guess being married to Ms. Duggar probably wouldn’t be all bad. I mean, yeah, you’d have to go along with all the Gawd mumbo jumbo, but the sex would sure be plentiful. Gotta keep the procreation thing goin, ya know.

    • Froggage

      Given that she’s had fifty-eleven children and probably has no clue what a Kegel exercise is, and that these freaks probably feel that sex is a disgusting necessary evil for the purpose of conception only, if you dream of two-minute missionary and hotdogs skimming down hallways, yeah, she’s your girl.

      • Kipco

        The young one has only had one so far. Mama’s the one that’s probably like a hippo’s yawn. I hear if you put your ear next to Mama’s crotch you can hear the ocean! Two minutes is also better than no minutes!

  • kfreed

    Pour another shot.

    “The Duggars Seem So Nice Until You Meet Their Terrifying Political Agenda

    They push their crackpot anti-science beliefs behind the scenes in Washington too.”
    http://observer.com/2014/12/the-duggars-politics/

  • constancel

    who are these dipshits again?

  • Emily Marston

    Maybe instead of all you atheists righteously condemning the believers (sound familiar?), you could attempt to broaden your narrow minds and see the wonder in the world around you. Not everyone needs the man in the sky illusion to see it, but I think its pretty clear to all of us in our “heart of hearts” that we live in an awe inspiring and unimaginably complex universe.

    Perhaps that’s what they are trying to say here?

    • Michael Deaton

      The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. – Carl Sagan.

      What they are saying here is an appeal to ignorance fallacy. They are not engaging honestly on any level, and the idea that “I see things that are complex to me, therefore a magic man did it” is in any way, shape or form, a position of respect for the true complexity of the universe is nonsensical degrees of double think silliness. What they are saying here is “I know what you think because a book of 2000 year old shepherders fables told me so” and “I don’t need to take the time to justify my beliefs because I realize I can’t and that would undermine my deeply held, inculturated belief system that was force fed to me by my control freak father who used my mother as a breeding sow for 30 years, and we can’t have that.”

      Sorry, but no. Just no. The Quiverfull movement is a mysogynistic, tyrannical, male centered Dominionist movement that is founded on the idea of mass producing lots of little mindless robots to go out and conquer. Literally. I encourage you to look into what the Quiverfull movement stands for. As a female, and I’m assuming a feminist, it should be very clear to you rather quickly that they stand for the absolute subjugation of females to male househeads, and a neo conservative 1950s fetishistic world view that is quite disturbing at its core.

      The Duggars are horrible people. A vagina is not a clown car.

    • JEinSJ

      Waste of time proselytizing to these folks. It’s like trying to dig holes in the ocean.

    • BurningBeard

      Yes, the Universe is amazingly complex and wonderful. Which makes me feel that taking, at face value, a book that was written by people that lived here 3000 years ago to try and explain what they couldn’t possibly understand as “the truth” is beyond silly and in fact VERY narrow-minded. I feel it’s exactly the opposite. I believe that every faith-filled Christian knows in their “heart of hearts” that there is no God because there has been no evidence to support it, ever.

      • Robert Ivey

        Actually your forgetting it was edited by commitee removing and adding parts based on the politics of the time as well during the reign of a Roman Emperor. We also don’t even actually have a complete text either its kinda pieced together.

    • Candice Kamencik

      Not believing in god is in no way mutually exclusive with “seeing the wonder around you” or feeling that we “live in an awe inspiring and unimaginably complex universe.” I’m sorry that you were confused about that, but I’m glad I could help you.

      You’re welcome.

  • Dog Gone

    I’m betting that around the time the bimbette hits 35, she will finally get fed up with the rubbish and ditch dumb ass, and become a sad bitter bitch, as distinct from being a smug airhead.

    • JEinSJ

      That’s a lot of credit.

      • Dog Gone

        You might well be right. But let’s assume for a moment that her views are so badly skewed because her reality has been so carefully controlled and altered with crazy propaganda. As she is an adult out from that artificial and toxic control, it is likely that she will be encountering a whole lot of challenges to those beliefs and assumptions in her own direct experience.
        I don’t see that leaving her a happy person, and I don’t see her as happy with the dumb ass and his limitations either.
        Perhaps I’m underestimating the strength and durability of airheadedness. Or is that air-head-dumb?

  • Bitter Scribe

    That Creationist guy is a real piece of work. “God does’t exist? YOU don’t exist!”

    I used to argue that way, but then I turned seven.

  • daffodil127

    These poor kids are victims of their parents’ noxious ideology and disrespect for education. People like the Duggars are why homeschooling needs to be regulated. And the curricula they purchase from publishers like Bob Jones University should be disallowed as the sole homeschooling source. Not that the girls get to be educated much once they are able to cook, clean, and look after younger siblings. I can’t wait until one escapes the cult and writes a tell-all book about these loons. There is a lot that is not shown on the tv show.

    • cf4l_sayWHAT

      yeah, that’s gonna be one hell of tell-all, considering one of the elder boys just came out saying he got caught diddling a few of his younger sisters…

      • daffodil127

        With all that has come out since then, I cannot fucking wait!

  • gr8risrael

    Most people I know actually admit they do not know if there is a supreme being or not. Most also say they don’t believe the bible stories anymore. That pretty well describes how I feel. I have not been given enough evidence to make a decision. If there is a supreme being, it surely is keeping its existence a secret.

    • Michael Eck

      That makes you an atheist. The term has been run through the ringer and misrepresented almost beyond repair. Along with the people who think they can ride the fence regarding a binary position and call themselves agnostic. Somehow, more then likely as a result of religous misinformation, they seem to think that atheism is an extreme. They haven’t yet taken the time to learn that agnosticism and atheism are not mutually exclusive. The fact of the matter is, if you don’t currently hold a belief in a god then you are an atheist. That’s all the term addresses. People, especially Christians, but also some ‘agnostics’ need to learn that there are actual meanings behind these words. The term agnostic does not stand on its own. You are a gnostic theist, agnostic theist, gnostic atheist, or agnostic atheist. When it comes to the single proposition of whether or not you believe a god exists, you either hold the belief or you do not hold the belief. If you don’t then you are an atheist (that says nthing else about you as a person by the way) if you do then you are a theist (once again that says nothing else about you). Once again, there is no riding the fence concerning a binary position about belief.

    • articulett

      What IS a supreme being? What is it made of? Why would it exist? How would we tell 1 from a million of them? A good one from a bad one? A 3-in-1 version from a 2-in-1 version? A male from a hermaphrodite? Does it have a brain made of cells? If not, how is it a “being”? Does it think? How? Why would a “supreme being” ever be disappointed? Why would it want to be believed in? Why would it make imperfect people like The Duggers when it could make perfectly perfect people like Jesus? Why would it blame it’s creations for being the way it knew they’d be before they made them? Nothing about religion– especially Christianity– makes sense.

      I don’t even understand the concept of “supreme being” and I don’t think anyone else does either. Would anyone even try to make sense of the concept if they weren’t afraid something super duper bad (like eternal damnation) might happen if they didn’t have faith? Don’t they realize that if there was the slightest evidence for souls real scientists would be testing that evidence to find out more like they do with everything else that is real (magnetism, electricity, DNA, space travel, atoms, mental illness,etc.)

  • ‘Supreme being’ is irrelevant, a throwback to ancient Rome and the domination of kings and emperors (and pharaohs).

    We need gods to explain ourselves to ourselves, (which we do badly because our invented gods are too perfect).

    The Greeks had better gods than we do, they were vulnerable and far more entertaining.

    The modern world requires a god that is a machine, it runs by itself destroying/consuming everything until it breaks then it destroys itself: too perfect.

  • cyninoregon

    What the fool is too brainwashed to get is that it is he who cannot evaluate anything objectively, because he sees everything as caused by a fictional man in the sky. If you understand science, the universe makes sense. BTW buddy, I never see god in the sky–I see the product of the Big Babg and billions of years of swirling gasses, rocks, metals, ice crystals, and heat. To me it’s a beautiful representation of science. Physics. That’s what I think of. Never some man creating it. The opposite. How unlikely that is. How science explains it all. We are stardust.

    Not a bearded man in the sky who needs to have people worship him and gets so mad at them he destroys them, gives children cancer and earthquakes, tidal waves, fires, violent predators, dictators, and bible-thumping presidents who tell lies to send them to war as soon as they are barely adults and have families of their own, to get their arms and legs blown off or to kill them, so they never get to know their kids…and then says, “Wow, look here…we are out of money now, so we can’t afford to treat the wounds and PTSD you got in our wars, and there is no money to educate your children, or pay for health care. Too bad you went to war instead of college and law or med school so you could afford to buy insurance yourself, and would not need social security….

    What a loving god to have created asshole republicans who try to steal every national asset not nailed down and then profess to love their bible that plainly states that it is more diffult for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven than for a camel to go through the eye of a needle. Yet they worship rich men, never vote for a presidential candidate who is not rich….did your god issue a supplement changing the rules on rich people and money? I must have missed it. My version says to care for the poor and the sick. Not to start wars. Turn the other cheek. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Yadda yadda yadda. Every word ignored except for some old testament malarkey changed in the new testament anyway.

  • cyninoregon

    And btw, this character needs to take classes in jurisprudence and political philosophy. Learn how man joins together to create units that can make and enforce laws for the common good. That is, what each person can do without hurting another citizen who is trying to do what he wants to do. It’s not rules that some mysterious old man in the sky told to the only person crazy enough to claim to have seen him. It’s rules negotiated by calm and sane members of that society. The ridicule that christians heap on this proper exercise of political power is pretty crazy. They would rather force everyone to abide by rules set down by an unseen force than rules created through political discource and thoughtful reasoning among people who are educated, intelligent and chosen by the people for this function. A man in the sky you must take my word for, versus Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, John Marshall, etc.

  • Rebecca Gardner

    Religion is a mental disease.

  • PrettyPagan

    What a load of rubbish… I don’t think even he believes his “argument”. Go tell it to The Big Guy In The Sky – idiot. :-/

  • Bladewalker56

    Lisle is an idiot. His religion has made him stupid.

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