Just plotting to screw Florida, as usual
Florida Gov. Rick Scott (R-Heartless Bastard) was against Medicaid expansion before he was for it, but now he’s back to being against it. Really against it. Of course he still wants federal dollars for his state’s own version of providing health care to low-income patients, but he’ll be goddamned if he’s going to let Obama tyrannize him into taking icky Obamacare dollars. And that is why he will SEE YOU IN COURT, Obama administration:

“It is appalling that President (Barack) Obama would cut off federal health care dollars to Florida in an effort to force our state further into Obamacare,” Scott said in a statement. […]

The agency targeted by the lawsuit — the U.S. Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, or CMS — is still deciding whether to renew a $2.2 billion program called the Low Income Pool that helps Florida hospitals treat low-income patients. And if no LIP dollars are awarded, Florida could be looking at a $1.3 billion budget gap.

The LIP was set to expire in June, but now Rick Scott is saying that if Florida does not get an extension, that is the same kind of “coercion” by President Obama as putting Rick Scott in a FEMA camp (a FEMA camp made of free-to-the-states health care for the low-income-but-not-poor). Hey, you know what would resolve this problem for Florida, by giving it sweet federal dollars and providing health care to the state’s low-income residents? It’s this crazy thing called the Affordable Care Act, and it would cover an additional 800,000 Floridians. Easy-peasy. But nope, the governor doesn’t want that kind of federal money, because states’ rights or whateverthefuck, just the other kind of federal money, because that is different.

Gov. Scott isn’t just a jerk, though; he’s also A Idiot. Because sending low-income patients to hospitals for health care is not the most fiscally conservative method. Which is why hospitals have saved billions of dollars in states that have expanded Medicaid, as the White House reminded us last month:

A massive expansion of insurance programs like Medicaid and a drop in emergency room visits saved hospitals at least $7.4 billion over the last year, the Obama administration announced[.]

With millions more people covered under ObamaCare last year, hospitals faced fewer bills from patients who lacked insurance and were unable to pay. Hospitals also saw fewer emergency room visits, which rack up far higher costs and often leave hospitals with the tab.

Ya see, if those low-income patients can enroll in Medicaid and go to doctors for non-emergency medical care, the patients get the care they need — and do not DIE from preventable illnesses — and hospitals save money, and the state saves money, and everybody wins. But oh hell no, can’t have that in Florida. So the state will now spend more extra money it does not actually have lying around, on a lawsuit to make the government keep funding a program, which expires in June and is not as good or as cost-saving as JUST EXPANDING MEDICAID THROUGH OBAMACARE.

The White House resisted the urge to respond to Scott’s threatened lawsuit with a huge groan, instead pointing out that, um, Florida could resolve this issue quite easily, HELLO and DUH:

White House press secretary Josh Earnest said he hadn’t seen the details of the lawsuit, but said expanding Medicaid would ensure that 800,000 Floridians get access to health care coverage.

“So there’s not a good reason why anybody in Florida would be in a situation of trying to block a policy that would benefit 800,000 Floridians,” he said.

But au contraire Mr. Earnest, there IS a good reason. See, if Gov. Scott reverses his position yet again and gives in to the president’s coercive tactics, he just might have to admit that Obamacare is GREAT for Florida after all, and NOT the worst thing that ever happened to America. And we certainly can’t have that.

[Tampa Bay Times]

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  • JohnBull

    Oh, my bad. I thought I was commenting on the dildo story.

    • Nounverb911

      Considering what the governor of Florida looks like….

  • Nounverb911
    • Brother Yam

      If only…

    • Anarchy Pony

      Really should be the header for every florida story.

    • mfp

      never gets old

  • Vecciojohn

    Well, it’s too bad, of course, but a few poor people dying from lack of care is a small price to pay for a chance to stick it to Obama again.

    • Brother Yam

      AND LIBERTY!!!!! Stupid libtards always forget about LIBERTY!!!!!

  • Nounverb911

    Isn’t it time for Hurricane Andrew to come back and finish the job it started all those years ago?

    • Antonin Dvorak

      Except let it hit north Florida, where all of Scott’s votes came from, this time.

      • JohnBull

        Is that when they ask for Big Gummit to fix all their shit?

  • Callyson

    Who does this asshole Rick Scott remind me of? Oh yeah:

  • Antonin Dvorak

    Reason # 5937 why none of my family wants to visit me in Florida.
    Reason #11874 why I really should get the hell out of Florida.

  • FauxAntocles

    This is the kind of shit that happens when you put Voldemort in charge.

  • Msgr_Moment

    “It is appalling that President (Barack) Obama would cut off federal health care dollars to Florida in an effort to force our state further into Obamacare,” Scott said in a statement. […]

    Sounds more convincing in the original Parseltongue.

    • Villago Delenda Est


      Yup, more convincing.

  • Callyson

    “From where I sit, it is difficult to understand how suing CMS on Day 45 of a 60-day session regarding an issue the state has been aware of for the last 12 months will yield a timely resolution to the critical health care challenges facing our state,” Senate President Andy Gardiner, R-Orlando, said.

    That’s a very logical statement, Senator Gardiner. So much so, in fact, that you’ll be called a RINO in 3…2…1…

    • Blank Ron

      Don’tcha love it when the cracks start to show in their own caucus?

      • ShriekinViolet

        Well, it DOES seem to be the cracker caucus.

  • Me not sure

    LIP money must be easier to grift than Obamacare money.

    • handyhippie65

      only if its powty. them powty lips are hard to beat.

      • Me not sure

        y’lack ’em purty do ya?

        • handyhippie65

          who don lak a purdy mauth? jus don skweel fer me. thet jus ain’tn rite.

  • exinkwretch

    I’m sure whatever plan that’s put together will include a generous cut directly to Bat Boy’s checking account. He’s an expert on that scam.

  • Shibusa

    Is Gov. Voldemort making the Illuminati Roc sign in that pic?

  • Calimaria

    Republicans used to be able to pull this ruse of standing on supposed principles while knowing there was no real risk because Obama or other Dems would cave to do the right thing. Thank goodness, Obama finally got over that flaw.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Yup, it’s time.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …I sincerely hope the Obama administration realizes that the only way you can drag the goTp into the modern century is to get their “base” to accept reality. There is nothing Barack Obama or any other Democrat could say to convince these cooters in red states that he is working in their best interest. The only thing that works is the “pain” of their own decisions! Rick Scott and the Republican held state senate refused Medicaid expansion and actively worked to portray it in a negative light. Now it’s time for them to explain to their constituents why their medical bills are skyrocketing while in other states it dropping.

    Rick Scott jumped into the deep end of the pool and it’s not the presidents responsibility to throw him a life preserver!!!

    It’s time for a little “Personal Responsibility”

    • Blank Ron

      ‘Personal Responsibility’? Now you’re just talking crazy talk.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      And by “modern century” we’re not talking the 21st, we’re talking the later half of the 20th. Baby steps.

    • Zyxomma

      Rick Scott jumped into the DERP end of the pool, and it’s not the President’s responsibility to throw him a life preserver.


  • JD Mulvey

    Republicans HATE frivolous lawsuits.

    • handyhippie65

      huh? oh sarcasm right? yea!, they hate them….. kinda.

  • LarryHoudini

    But Obamacare doesn’t work! I just read an article last week about a bureaucrat that lost somebody’s form and they never found it.


    • nmmagyar

      RE: DMV. I’d get pissy after my 25th consecutive day of dealing with: 75% minors trying to get fake ID’s, 24% morons trying to register vehicles without many/most/all of the required paperwork/inspections/etc 48% jackasses too “important” to wait in lines, 36% old people I had to make have all the sadz because they are too fucking dangerous to be behind the wheel and shitty pay.

      • LarryHoudini

        Sounds like you may have once worked there yourself, my Hungarian friend in New Mexico.

  • Shoto

    Jeebuz Xmas Bunny on a gurney, is this guy a ginormous asshole, or what?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      If the “what” is a megaginormous asshole, then yes!

  • MrBlobfish

    Another heartwarming tale from the Southland.

  • ShriekinViolet

    I think it’s important for Gov Scott to take a principled stand against the federal government for footing nearly the entire bill for Medicaid expansion in a way that prevents the Gov from grifting his cut from it.

    • ZangoCrudmonger

      Gah, let’s just demand everyone in Florida pay tribute to his wife in urine. Maybe this bald messiah, saving everyone from themselves, can turn it into whine.

  • MrBlobfish

    1 Odd Trick Stops Erectile Government Dysfunction

  • Steverino247

    I think this is a fitting commentary at this moment in Florida history…

  • Poly_Ester

    Are any Columbia/HCA contracts in jeopardy?

  • whatwhomever

    Rick Scott + Florida = Ultimate Dick Joke.

  • Spotts1701

    Maybe the reason they won’t give him the money is the last time they gave him money, by some weird happenstance some of it ended up in his pockets?

  • dslindc

    Weird. I thought we death-paneled Florida. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

    • Spotts1701

      We tried, but the pillow kept slipping off.

    • ShriekinViolet

      Probably have better luck drowning* them. Clearly, they’ll never see that coming. Or at least, if they do, they won’t be able to talk about it.

      *with votes, obviously

    • PubOption

      The olds will die off without our help.

  • Anarchy Pony

    Shouldn’t that be (R-Slytherin)?

  • Ricky Gay

    misplaced dildo found

    • Villago Delenda Est


  • hornheat

    Why don’t the Florida idiots just call it the ‘Affordable Care Act’ instead of ‘Obamacare’, take the money, and hold self-congratulatory press conferences. Problem solved.

    • willi0000000

      because there are dark and arcane utterances that must not be made in Florida . . . even referring to them by their mystic symbols (AGW, ACA, …) would bring utter destruction to the kingdom.

  • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

    Bat Boy Thirsty For Lifeblood Of Federal Healthcare Dollars

  • Villago Delenda Est

    “It is appalling that President (Barack) Obama would cut off federal
    health care dollars to Florida in an effort to force our state further
    into Obamacare,” Scott said in a statement.

    It is appalling that the people of Florida avoided the polls in droves (very large droves) and allowed the stupid people of Florida (that is, the teabangical twits who should be marched into FEMA camps for “processing”) to reinstall this literal dickhead to another term as governor to further fuck up the state.

  • chicken thief

    Not only is Rick Scott a dumbfuck, but he’s a dumbfuck. Someone please give him a quick lesson in civics so he will know that the Preznit, regardless of the color of his/her skin, does not control the purse strings.

    He needs to be bad mouthing the Turtle and the Orangeman. And, of course, himself for being a dumbfuck to begin with.

  • ZangoCrudmonger

    It’s murder by numbers, 1, 2, 3

  • Jinmichigan

    Rick Scott is the classic maroon. But Florida elected him twice, so not much sympathy for them.

    • thud

      Have they got that election fraud stuff under control down there?That’s the first order of biz in a RW state,ain’t it? to “fix” the elections?

  • mfp

    rick scott, DumbestMothaFuckaAlive

  • Flashman

    Fortunately, this whole discussion is moot, since Florida will soon be under water due to the climate change that isn’t happening either.

    • Of course, they’ll try to move north, so we really do need to build that border fence.

  • Paperless Tiger

    I’m beginning to suspect that it’s not a good idea to vote for criminals, even white collar ones.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Especially white collar ones.

  • bumfug

    I’d think a crook like Rick Scott would want to stay far away from a courthouse after the company he ran (Columbia/HCA) paid $1.7 billion in criminal and civil fines for the largest hospital corporation fraud case in American history.

    • thud

      But thats all in the past. We’ve moved on! dwelling on the past might inhibit the creativity of our job creation class and if you are currently being paid above minimum wage(assuming you have a job) then you don’t want to do that.

  • fratdawgg23

    Here is Rick Scott as DJ Govvy Gov, waving his hands in the air while imposing himself on a captive audience on a Carnival Cruise ship… LoL

    • Mehmeisterjr

      What a nightmare cruise! Although later, everybody got the norovirus so things became much better.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      At least it isn’t a hardship for him to wave his arms in the air like he just don’t care.

  • Manhattan123

    Gov. Bat Boy hates free government money, he likes the kind you embezzle. Makes him feel like he earned it.

  • VirginiaLady

    Ya know, he does look more like Voldemort in pictures where he’s not catching bugs under porch lights….

  • Rick Hill

    They’re still making the transition to claiming that Obamacare was their idea that saved the state money, despite having to fight the democratic party tooth and nail to get the help our citizens deserve. They just need a stealthy way to change that name to republican freedom health coverage for patriotic America or something equally catchy.

  • fawkedifiknow

    Wisconsin to Florida: “I’ll see your moron Governor Scott, and raise you our asshole Governor Walker.”

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Florida to Wisconsin: “I’ll see your asshole Governor Walker and raise you our bimbo Attorney General Bondi.”

      • fawkedifiknow

        Back to you: “I’ll see you with our empty skirt Lt. Gov’r Rebecca Kleefisch and go all in with our brain damaged Sen. Ron Johnson.”

        • Mehmeisterjr

          I’ll see you and raise you an Alan West.

          • fawkedifiknow

            Looks like I’ll have to use the nucular bomb: Just try to match Joe McCarthy.
            Dick Heitman

          • Mehmeisterjr

            Hats off for the “nucular” Bushism but I see you and raise you Hernando de Soto and Juan Ponce de Léon. Out-cray-cray that!

          • fawkedifiknow

            Easy-peasy: Jeffrey Dahmer and Ed Gein.

            Dick Heitman

          • Mehmeisterjr

            Dahmer and Gein are distinguished men in their line of work (serial killing) but I raise you the Arthur G. Dozier School for Boys where for decades representatives of the State of Florida railroaded kids into the system for minor offenses or no offense and all, then proceeded to rape, beat and outright murder their charges.


          • Mehmeisterjr


          • kdez


      • Tom Tait

        Im in this!!! Wisconsin, I will see your Governor Walker, Lt, Governor Kleefisch and Ron Johnson and call you with Marco Rubio, and Jeb Bush…..

  • GRH


  • Guest

    Rick Scott wants your cake and to eat it too.

  • Gregory Brown

    Naked Mole Rat Governor is having a mad.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    Gov. Scott is the quintessential Florida Man.

  • DahBoner

    If you’re poor, here’s how Rick Scott’s healthcare program works….

  • Mehmeisterjr

    Have you heard about the new bizarro street drug in Florida – Flakka? Apparently, it causes Florida men to rip off their clothes, run around nekkid, proclaim themselves to be God and/or Thor, fuck trees and do other stuff that seems weird, out-of-control and self-destructive.

    In short, it makes them act like Governor Rick “Flakka” Scott. We must stop this scourge!!!!11..!!.1.11!

  • Sabreen60

    Floridians must have wanted this crook to be Governor. Or at the very least just didn’t care and didn’t vote for someone else.

  • Peter Tobias

    “So the state will now spend more extra money it does not actually have lying around”
    I have read that Florida actually has the money lying around, to sue and to help hospitals, that the state government, however, has already planned a tax cut with that money and now have to decide if they want a tax cut together with with Medicaid expansion or nothing.

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