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He's no rocket scientist

So the big “get” in GQ’s profile of Dr. Ben Carson is that, while watching Barack Obama’s State of the Union address this year with his pal/adviser/consigliere/media handler Armstrong Williams, this happened:

As the two men turned to the TV, they began dissecting Obama’s performance.

“He looks good,” Williams said. “He looks clean. Shirt’s white. The tie. He looks elegant.”

“Like most psychopaths,” Carson grumbled. “That’s why they’re successful. That’s the way they look. They all look great.” […]

“He faces the same challenges you will face,” Williams said of Obama as he spoke. “He’s gotta convince people to believe him. That’s all he’s doing: selling his narrative.”

“But he knows he’s telling a lie!” Carson vented. “He’s trying to sell what he thinks is not true! He’s sitting there saying, ‘These Americans are so stupid I can tell them anything.'”

That there is pretty much a perfect Ben Carson story. The neurosurgeon who sounds so reasonable when he says that of course vaccines save lives and all parents should get their kids vaccinated, but also seems to be auditioning to replace Keith Ablow, Fox News’s favorite psychiatrist, the minute the topic strays away from medicine. It’s great hyperbole, will play great with conservative readers (who are filling rightyblog comment sections with “Carson nails it yet again” this morning), and is also not something a Serious Candidate says about the person whose job he thinks he’s qualified for. And no, don’t expect Ben Carson to take it back, because he knows he’s right, and that the liberal media just twists his words to make him look like a crazy goofball.

Oh but there’s so much other good stuff in the GQ piece, too. Like Ben Carson’s visit to Israel, which reporter Jason Zengerle went along for. There’s this scene with a young Israeli woman who got the thankless job of briefing Carson on How Israel Works. Carson asks her, “In the United States, we have Republicans, Democrats, and independents. What do you have?”

The woman answered Carson’s question about political parties, telling him that there were Labor and Likud and a host of other factions in the Knesset. “And what is the role of the Knesset?” he interjected. This prompted a tutorial on Israel’s legislature. Carson is a tall, dignified-looking man with a placid, almost sleepy face. As he tried to concentrate on his Hebrew Schoolhouse Rock primer, he seemed even more fatigued. “It sounds complex,” he finally said. “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”

Yes, kids, Ben Carson appears to be unfamiliar with the basics of a parliamentary system, and if it’s so complex and confusing for an actual brain surgeon, the most obvious solution is to do things the American Way. Sadly, Zengerle doesn’t seem to have asked Carson if he thought that Israel’s national health insurance system is the worst thing since slavery; we bet Carson would have some thoughts on that, too.

And then there’s the bit where an IDF lieutenant colonel is assigned to walk Carson around a tourist spot in the Golan Heights and teach him about Israel’s strategic situation. The colonel is explaining his views on the Syrian civil war, over thataway in the distance:

He claimed that most of the Islamist fighters weren’t Syrian but came from Morocco and Europe. “It’s just like the troublemakers in Ferguson,” Carson said, betraying a habit of wedging the unfamiliar into a context he understands.

Not that the GQ piece is all hits on Carson being a boob who’s completely out of his depth — though those are the fun parts, yes. Zengerle looks at Carson’s up-from-poverty backstory, and his genuine brilliance as a neurosurgeon as well. Thing Yr Wonkette didn’t know, for instance: In 1987 Carson performed the first successful operations to separate conjoined twins who were joined at the head; both babies survived. And Zengerle gives due attention to the prominence of Carson’s success story in the African-American community, where for years he was held up as an inspiring example of a poor kid from Detroit who made good:

“I can’t even count how many times I saw Ben Carson when I was a kid,” the writer Ta-Nehisi Coates, who grew up in inner-city Baltimore in the ’80s and ’90s, told me. “Any time anyone wanted to bring out any sort of inspirational figure for young black kids, especially young black boys, in Baltimore, you turned to Ben Carson.”

Of course, with his newfound embrace of rightwing wackaloonery, Carson seems determined to throw a lot of that cultural cachet out the window — thanks to a teensy little character flaw that’s probably the best observation in the GQ profile:

Carson is rarely shy telling others that they’re foolish. With both the stereotypical arrogance of a surgeon and the understandable brio of a self-made man, Carson seems to harbor an unshakable belief that he knows more than most anyone else.

And so when he’s reminded that most African-Americans don’t agree with his politics — if polling can be trusted, which it can’t, because pollsters are full of liberal bias — Carson knows for a fact that black people have just been lied to by Democrats and the media:

[Carson’s rightwing stances] are painful for African-Americans like Ta-Nehisi Coates, one of America’s most celebrated writers on race, who credits Carson with providing an example to young blacks. “I’ll always be in debt to him for what he did, but in terms of who he is now, I don’t quite understand that,” Coates says. “It seems like Barack Obama is the exact sort of person he’d have wanted us to grow up to be.” When I mentioned Coates’s criticism to Carson, he betrayed no discomfort. “It doesn’t surprise me,” he said, “because people grow up and they listen to propaganda.”

Ben Carson isn’t ever wrong. The world is wrong, and Ben Carson will do head surgery on it to make it work right. Not as president, of course — once he loses enough primaries, he’ll graduate to the ranks of Fox News experts and other players on the rightwing media circuit. And he’ll continue to wonder why everybody else on the planet is so stubbornly stupid about reality.

[GQ via The Hill]

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  • MsAnthropesMr

    Makes you think about the expression, “This isn’t brain surgery”, don’t it?

    • Msgr_Moment

      I vouldn’t have vanted Wernherr von Braun for President, eizher.

      • MsAnthropesMr

        “Once the rockets go up, who cares where they come down?”

        • Villago Delenda Est

          “That’s not my department! says Werner von Braun”

          • Amy!

            In German, or Russian, I know how to count down!

      • Ducksworthy

        Point taken.

      • H0mer0

        One of my colleagues (currently retired) cared for Werner von Braun when he was hospitalized. He said that Dr von Braun was very nice and charming –like a sociopath (my colleague is of “the tribe.”)

  • Oblios_Cap

    “because people grow up and they listen to propaganda.”

    Well, to be fair, that’s why the churches are full.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      And why Faux “News” is watched by millions.

  • Beowoof14

    Listening Ben rant on about nothing, has only cause me to conclude, he is a Savant. Great doctoring, anything else, such as politics, completely clueless how liberals and their policies changed his life.

    • dshwa

      It’s not uncommon in surgeons. Good at surgery, but any medicine that doesn’t involve cutting, and they’re clueless. The good ones know this, and defer to others. The bad ones…

      And I’m pretty sure Dr. Carson falls into the latter group.

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        And neurosugeons are the worst.

    • Poly_Ester

      One talent would make him an idiot-savant.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      And Teh Gay. He believes you catch Teh Gay in prison.

  • Lizzietish81
  • Callyson

    “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”

    “Because we’ve seen how well that system has worked for you Americans, that’s why!”

  • Nounverb911

    “Ben Carson isn’t ever wrong.”
    Did Ben blame the patients whenever he made an “OOPSY”?

    • CalvinianChoice

      A surprising percentage of surgeons do exactly that.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        “I did my best, which was vastly better than anyone else on the planet could have done.”

  • PubOption

    Most self-made men worship their creator.

    • Bill Slider

      The White Man?

  • Villago Delenda Est

    That’s not Obama you’re looking at in the mirror, Ben.

    • chicken thief

      They all look alike. Even to Ben.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …to this day it baffles me, why anyone would let this idiot poke around in their skull?!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      He’s fine when it comes to fixing other people’s brains. He’s the small town barber with the crappy haircut.

  • AngryBlakGuy

    QUESTION: who has the whiniest bitch face Ben Carson or Ted Cruz?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      What? No love for Sean Hannity?

    • beatbort

      I’m going with Palin.

    • dshwa

      Yes.

    • calliecallie

      AOT,K

    • chicken thief

      I’d suggest Kirby Delauter if Kirby Delauter allowed us to use his name, Kirby Delauter.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Carson has the whininess down, but he lacks Cruz’s punchability. Paul Ryan comes in a distant second.

    • Rabbit_Rebozo

      No shout outs for Scott Walker, the most embarrassing thing to come out of Wisconsin since Old Style Light?

    • pianoplayer1

      TED CRUZ! Plus his eyebrows were installed backward.

  • fawkedifiknow

    It’s almost like being good at one thing or smart in a certain discipline doesn’t necessarily translate. Or, some such liberal gobbledeegook.

    • Ducksworthy

      Some sort of idiot savant? I could believe that, maybe.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      On the other hand, Dumbya’s complete absence of talent in any field did translate perfectly into his presidenting.

  • Msgr_Moment

    He seems nice good. He seems clean. Shirt’s white. The tie. He seems elegant.

    • willi0000000

      . . . and so articulate.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        LOL. You noticed the parallel too, eh? I just about spit out my cofee when I read that statement. It’s as if Ben’s irony center has been surgically removed.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          He probably removed it himself, which could explain some of the problems.

  • tegrat

    Probably been said before, but bears repeating, “Doctor, heal thyself!”

  • Spotts1701

    Why are people with such narrow views and small points of reference the ones that get lauded as “jes’ folks”?

  • ….. ‘These Americans are so stupid I can tell them anything.’”

    -Ben Carson.

  • KinkyReggae

    Ben Carson, the African-America Monica Wehby. Both brain surgeons, both full of the dipshittery.

  • Joshua Norton

    Any time anyone wanted to bring out any sort of inspirational figure for young black kids, especially young black boys, in Baltimore, you turned to Ben Carson.”

    Ben Carson is just like Barack Obama, in that he won’t be president in February of 2017 either.

    • Nounverb911

      So Mitch McConnell will finally get his wish of making Obama a one two term president?

      • Rabbit_Rebozo

        Will Yertl and Sunkist still exist once Bamz is gone?

  • Callyson

    earlier this month, during an appearance on CNN, he argued that homosexuality is a choice, “because a lot of people who go into prison go into prison straight, and when they come out, they’re gay.” (After an uproar, Carson issued an apology and declared he would no longer talk about gay rights.)

    Well, there’s that…

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Now if we can just get him to no longer talk about anything outside his narrow specialty, we’ll be doing fine!

      • Ducksworthy

        Somehow, I suspect his “narrow specility” is even narrower than advertised since he seems not to be doing that anymore.

    • Tallmutha

      I actually think he thinks he’s punishing us.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      “Imma gonna stop digging right now.”
      Romney might have won if he’d followed that prescription.

  • beatbort

    OK, that does it. I need to see transcripts and several forms of i.d. before I will now believe that Ben Carson was 1) ever a brain surgeon; and 2) ever worked and taught at Johns Hopkins University.

    • dshwa

      It does take brains to become a brain surgeon, but that doesn’t mean you have to ever use them to learn or understand anything other than brain surgery.

  • Callyson

    Yes, his chances for winning may be slim—only two presidents have reached the White House without electoral experience or high military rank—but activists on the right hope that, at the very least, Carson will give voice to a conservative anger and resentment that’ll influence the rest of the GOP field.

    Jesus fucking Christ, the other wingnuts aren’t angry and resentful enough for those lunatics?

    • Rabbit_Rebozo

      Nope. Nobody’s anger or outrage is as pure as their own. It’s the Peoples Front of Judea vs. the Judean Peoples Front all over again.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      No, they are aiming for the Michael Sibley level of angry and resentful. For the sake of awareness.

  • dshwa

    Not entirely ironically, Surgeons have the highest incidence of psychopaths and sociopaths of any career.

    • calliecallie

      You’d think if he’s so good at psychological diagnosis, he’d recognize projection when he does it.

      • Riley Whodat Venable

        That isn’t what he does. Psychiatrists (and other therapists) work on the brain’s software. Uncle Dr. Ben works on brain hardware.

    • Hardly Ideal
    • Riley Whodat Venable

      I hope he makes it to the debates. Uncle Dr. Ben and Calgary Cruz both have egos that make them believe they are always the smartest in the room. Watching them debate each kther will be a hoot.

  • I’m impressed with Dr. Carson’s telempathic skills. He was born on Betazed, but his mother is human, so he should be eligible for President of the United Earth. Nothing can go wrong with a half-Betazoid at the helm!

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Ted Cruz libel!

  • kindness

    This from a man who had to be informed that Israel has a Parlamentary form of government waiting for his flight to Israel.

    Yea, I think I’ll pass on any of his ‘opinions’ thanx.

  • Ducksworthy

    How did this clown become a “brain surgeon”? Doesn’t that usually require a working familiarty with the actual universe?

    • dshwa

      Surprisingly no.

    • Jeff Furlington

      Nope, just the human brain.

      • dshwa

        Well the anatomy of it. Not the psychiatric functioning of it.

        • MrCanoehead

          He’s like a mechanic who can’t drive.

    • Hardly Ideal

      I heard about the brain surgery part on Rachel Maddow, and it broke my heart; he did an awesome thing and saved kids, but then became a brainless douche himself.

      It seems that his success in life…
      *puts on shades David Caruso-style*
      …went to his head.

  • Poly_Ester

    Generalizing a bit. All well-groomed, well-dressed people are psychopaths — Bush and Cheney for example, QED MF!!!

    • MrBlobfish

      White shirts, black souls.

      • Rabbit_Rebozo

        They have souls?

    • Hardly Ideal

      And yet, if I wear my favorite ratty jacket, I’d be considered a psycho, too. I guess some of us are just fucked.

      • AnOuthouse

        Wear a hoodie and be considered a thug.

      • Poly_Ester

        No,you would probably be considered a sociopath, that is a psychopath that hasn’t yet committed a crime.

  • Jeff Furlington

    Is it possible that a brain-surgeon is so clueless and un-self-aware that he actually believes that he’s not part of the wingnut propaganda machine, and that the reality-based people he hates are really the ones spreading lies? That’s about as insane as claiming that people who point out racism are the real racists.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      In other words, standard GOP operating procedure.

    • anniegetyerfun

      I can’t believe you brought race into this, racist.

    • Rabbit_Rebozo

      People that claim that people who claim that people that point out racism are the real racists are the real racists!

      • Blank Ron

        Well, you’re the real racist for pointing that out!

    • JAWs

      It’s amazing what you can’t see when you keep your eyes shut!

  • Wait, so if psychopaths are always well dressed, was Obama NOT a psychopath when he wore that tan suit?

    Also, too… Anyone wearing a clean shirt is now a psychopath!

    • Dr. Ben is looking pretty tidy. Hmm.

      • Poly_Ester

        But he knows in his heart of hearts that he in not a psycho.

        • Blank Ron

          I say we go in and have a look. Where’s my hole saw?

    • artem1s

      Obviously, Dr. Ben thinks Hannibal Lector is a real person

  • RoyalUglyDude

    “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”

    Because no country has adopted a presidential system since the early 19th century. Every new democracy has opted for a parliamentary or mixed-parliamentary system.

    • anniegetyerfun

      With proportional representation, also as well and too.

  • Anarchy Pony

    Yet again, proof that technical expertise is not the same as actual intellect.

  • beatbort

    GQ is late to the (tea) party with this profile of Carson. His 15 minutes ended last month.

  • “It sounds complex,” he finally said. “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”

    Because Israel knows who’s top dog in this relationship. If Netanyahu had made that statement, the Republican Congress would right now be demanding a Constitutional Congress to dissolve the current government and replace it with their model.

  • Bill Slider

    Both born into poverty, Dr Ben Carson and Supreme Court Justice Clearance Thomas, though attached at the hip, share but one brain. This is a job for Dr Jesus to fix.

  • shastakoala

    A brain surgeon or a politician with on the job training is scary.

  • Ergoetal

    “He looks clean. Shirt’s white. The tie. He looks elegant.”

    “Like most psychopaths,” Carson grumbled. “That’s why they’re successful. That’s the way they look. They all look great…..”

    Whew. Guess I’m perfectly sane…

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    Your parliament system is so complicated, why don’t you adopt our system, and just vote for whoever hates liberals the most? Think about all that time you spend pouring over the issues and debating, wouldn’t you rather be watching sportsball!

    • AnOuthouse

      Pull any lever, and let the owners of the voting machine companies choose your leaders.

    • To be fair, right-wing Israelis have a choice of three or four parties to compete for “whoever hates Arabs the most”.

  • geoffalnutt

    Yes! It’s a common fact that most well-dressed gay Muslin Kenyan terrorists are psychopaths who tend to marry tall, bald, beautiful, angry black women from Chicago and then become President Of The United States a lot. Watch your back!

    • Squirrels05

      I am surprised all our Presidents have not been thus, since there are so many psychopaths running about.

  • sosuume

    God, can these people get any dumber???

    • elpinche

      Yes.

    • Gleem-McShinez

      “Your prayer has been answered”

      –God

  • Squirrels05

    Carson clearly enjoys Kool-Aid every day.

    • pianoplayer1

      The thing is, one obviously has to be extremely intelligent to become a neurosurgeon. There has to be another reason he is so messed up.

      • marecek21

        Knowledge and skill in one area does not ensure knowledge and wisdom in all others. Total experts in one field can be utter morons in another. Take, for example, Ben Carson. Then we also have the case of the people who are total morons in all respects – such as Sarah Palin.

      • Blank Ron

        Perhaps he was experimenting on himself?

  • chicken thief

    “He looks good,” Williams said. “He looks clean. Shirt’s white. The tie. He looks elegant.”

    The tie? The motherfucking TIE?!!!! MAH MAIN MAN LOUIE GOHMERT LIBELZ!!11!!!!

    • Squirrels05

      ‘He looks clean’.

      When in the world has POTUS ever looked dirty?

      That is akin to saying ‘he speaks well’. As Chris Rock pointed out: people make that compliment about re tarded people. And Colin Powell, it turns out.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        Well we did have that one POTUS who spent most of his time clearing brush. Even so, he was remarkably clean compared to actual ranch workers.

      • Rabbit_Rebozo

        Grant might have spent a night or two wallowing in his own vomit.

  • Squirrels05

    Dear Israel:

    Your govenrment is too confusing for a brain surgeon to understand. He will blindly support your nation, but please change your system out for one he can grasp. And change the name of your governing body, for crying out loud. And Hebrew? Dear lord, can you change everything to English?! That will help the evangelicals’ rapture much more convenient.
    Thanks for the help!
    Ben.

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    Fun fact: Psychopaths prefer a clean white shirt because it accentuates the blood spatters.

    • Squirrels05

      Plus, it makes life much more difficult for the cleaners; Patrick Bateman Logic.

  • AnOuthouse

    The interview budgets at Playboy and GQ have unfortunately felt the full brunt of the economic downturn. They’ve been forced to turn to the budget C-listers: irrelevant evil incarnate from the last decade, and bug fuck loony tunes future GOP wannabees.

  • Mormos

    surgeon = psychiatrist, duh

    • Blank Ron

      It’s sorta like a wizard mechanic who can’t actually drive a car.

  • chicken thief

    If I spent my days going on Faux News to bash the Kenyan Usurper could I claim to be a pediatric neurosurgeon also too?

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    The right wing has a collection of nominally intelligent people (Harvard grads, anyone?) who somehow manage to be complete fuckwits. What they all have in common is (a) a failure to see reality when it conflicts with their received/preconceived notions, and (b) a supreme arrogance that renders (a) inconceivable. Carson is the perfect exemplar of the species.

    • AnOuthouse

      I’m getting the impression that for the right price those elitist institutions will graduate anybody.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        George W. Bush couldn’t get admitted to the U of Texas law school. Grades and test scores not up to snuff.

        So he opted instead for a Harvard MBA.

        I rest my case.

    • Rabbit_Rebozo

      Thank JHW for legacy admissions, eh? Otherwise these people would be forced to actually earn their ways in the world and would probably all starve to death.

    • Whale Chowder

      They may or may not be fuckwits but they certainly believe their base are (is?).

      And they’ve been proven right over and over.

      Take Cruz for example. Not a dumb man; clerked for a Supreme Court justice, went back to Tejas and led the Supreme Court practice for a major Houston law firm and represented the state in the SC as Solicitor General.

      The dumb shit he says now is pure red meat for the dumbshits he wants to energize.

      • House0fTheBlueLights

        All their base are belong to fuckwittery

    • marecek21

      “Tehran” Tom Cotton and Ted “Cuba/Canada” Cruz are two other exemplars.

  • AnOuthouse

    I bet the twins joined at the head that he separated just had gum in their hair.

  • Spurning Beer

    Hey Hebrews, less Parliament, more Funkadelic, okay?

  • unStunned

    He’s dead now, so it’s too late to hope for his career in politics/media/15-minutes land, but I had a crazy uncle … batshit, peach-orchard-boar crazy … who could have been a real star. If only we could have gotten Armstrong Williams together with Uncle Jimmy in time. (Sigh.)

  • Anarchy Pony

    “He looks clean. Shirt’s white. The tie. He looks elegant.”

    “Like most psychopaths,” Carson grumbled. “That’s why they’re successful. That’s the way they look. They all look great…..”
    Ironic since Ben promotes an economic system that encourages psychopathy for success.

    • marecek21

      Ironic also because he perfectly describes himself (you know the rage-aholic who once stabbed one of his fellow med students).

      • Anarchy Pony

        Really? Damn.

  • Anarchy Pony

    “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”
    I dunno, probably because they want to accomplish things.

    • marecek21

      The Right always lambastes the Left for asking “Why can’t we all just get along?” On the other hand, the Right should be skewered for the thought, “Why can’t everyone just be and act like we do?”

      • Rabbit_Rebozo

        The right doesn’t really want everyone to be just like them… because then who would clean their pools?

  • OneYieldRegular

    “So what exactly is this Knesse-Knesse-Knesse-stan-stan-stan?”

  • Steverino247

    Superficial charm and good intelligence? Nope

    Absence of delusions and other signs of irrational thinking? N/A

    Absence of nervousness or neurotic manifestations? N/A

    Unreliability? Nope

    Untruthfulness and insincerity? Nope

    Lack of remorse and shame? Nope

    Inadequately motivated antisocial behavior? Nope

    Poor judgment and failure to learn by experience? Nope

    Pathologic egocentricity and incapacity for love? Nope

    General poverty in major affective reactions? Nope

    Specific loss of insight? Nope

    Unresponsiveness in general interpersonal relations? Nope

    Fantastic and uninviting behavior with alcohol and sometimes without? Nope

    Suicide threats rarely carried out? N/A

    Sex life impersonal, trivial, and poorly integrated? Nope

    Failure to follow any life plan? Nope

    Diagnosis? Ben Carson is full of shit.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I could have told you that in four notes!

    • Last Hussar

      Well, at least this shows he isn’t a psychopath

  • SuspectedDemocrat

    Our system is easier because the President can make all kinds of decisions and conduct foreign policy without having to run everything past Congress first. Oh, wait!

  • Gleem-McShinez

    After successfully separating the heads of conjoined twins, Ben Carson now attempts to successfully join his head and rectum.

    • marecek21

      Already done.

  • SJLAW

    He is soooooo jelly of Obama.

  • Baby_Raptor

    This guy is proof of one of evolution’s biggest flaws: Chronic negative IQ won’t kill you.

  • MegPasadena

    “Sadly, Zengerle doesn’t seem to have asked Carson if he thought that Israel’s national health insurance system is the worst thing since slavery;”

    I bet his answer would have been “it is the worst thing since the Holocaust.”

    • mellowjohn

      you mean that Israeli national health insurance system that covers – among other things – abortions and birth control? the israeli health insurance system that U.S. aid helps pay for?
      that one?

  • Boscoe

    Judging by Ben’s eyes, he also knows some top-shelf Afghani when he sees it…

  • Enfant Terrible

    Amazing. I’ve known PhDs who have accomplished big things in their fields who were complete idiots on matters outside their expertise. Dr. Carson sounds like one of them.

  • JAWs

    “But he knows he’s telling a lie!” Carson vented. “He’s trying to sell what he thinks is not true! He’s sitting there saying, ‘These Americans are so stupid I can tell them anything.’”

    But enough about the Fox News instruction manual, tell us about President Obama.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Pedophile Neurosurgeon? Oh, wait. Sorry. I didn’t mean that. It’s been a long morning.

  • Whale Chowder

    Ben Carson Is A Brain Surgeon, So He Knows A Psychopath (Obama) When He Sees One (Obama)

    What do you suppose he sees when he looks in a mirror?

    • Boscoe

      Obama.

  • Esteban Rey

    Alright. The artists and photoshoppers need to get to work on an image of mad scientist Ben Carson performing unnecessary brain surgery on uncle Sam.

  • Rufus T. Firefly

    He obviously grasps the complexities of foreign policy with surgical precision.

  • JParkerSD46

    Haha, Dr. Ben. Yes, all the young whippersnappers are growing up listening to propaganda. What is it that you call the 24-hour a day spew that is Fox News? Oh, yeah…fair and balanced. Right.

  • nice_marmot

    I’m not a neurosurgeon, but I am a biologist so I can tell you with a 99% confidence interval that something is seriously wrong with the gray insidy-part of Carson’s head.

  • Paperless Tiger

    “Why don’t they just adopt the system we have?”

    File that under, “It could always be worse.” Netanyahu is a right winger over there, but just imagine him trying to destroy their national health care system like the GOP is doing here.

    • The American system of fully separated powers between executive and legislature is hardly ever adopted for new countries today because they’ve seen what gridlock can do. In a parliamentary system, either the head of State can dissolve Parliament, or (the lower house of) Parliament can sack the Cabinet and choose a new one. You don’t get these 2-year-long standoffs.

  • Incoming Ham

    Doctor: thank you for your service to mankind, you are a talented surgeon. Oh, and you’re fired.

  • JohnW

    Wait, wait, I know the answer to this one: it’s either Rocket Surgery or Brain Science!

  • Swampgas_Man

    Everyone Who Disagrees With Me is A Idiot™– the Republican Credo.

  • Guest

    Dear Dr Carson, You don’t have to find the right words, just be yourself. We’ll quote you verbatim. Thanks again, The Liberal Media

  • DahBoner

    A typical Dr. Ben Carson brain surgery…

    http://media1.giphy.com/media/3ayyJHZsPQqjK/200w.gif

  • Magic Juan

    He believes everything he knows he learned all by himself and everything he has he earned all by himself. And he believe everyone else has to do the same. That’s the republican credo, so that’s why he’s a republican.

  • Frank Kozel

    I cannot found out on the internet about HOW MANY BRAIN SURGERIES cARSON DONE. How many surgions were involved in the one so called famous twin seperations at the head( surly no a surgery that one doctor can do alone) so why does Crason get all the BS credit. At what age did he start surgery and how many has he done and what were the survival rates. No facts on the internet just BS hype about how great a person he is. I also say a racist speech he made during the Ferguson fisasco.

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