It's a special Ho-Ho-Huh? Edition of Derp Roundup, the feature where we bring you the stories that don't quite deserve their very own posts, but are too stupid to ignore altogether. So light the candles and gather round the hearth, and start drinking first thing in the morning if that gets you through this mess. Absinthe is Christmassy, isn't it?
Our Top Derp comes from Sycamore Township, Ohio, where Jasen Dixon put up a creative holiday display: a zombie nativity scene. Dixon operates a haunted house every fall and had plenty of festive -- if not flesh-covered -- figures available, including a scary blank-eyed Zombie Baby Jesus. Dixon appeared to be quite pleased with the reaction when interviewed by local TV station WXIX:
The neighbors don’t like it. My father hates it and anything bad that happens he blames it on that ... On the average we probably get 30 or 40 cars stop and taking pictures, getting out with their camera. People that follow zombie movies and stuff like that love it.
...instead of dodging the Chevys.
Not to mention a well-composed 20-word sentence written out (with correct spelling, except for capitalization) by a toddler. No wonder he has a job. How much does Roger Ailes pay him, anyway?