Let’s All Help This Sad Bundy Ranch Supporter I.D. The Jackbooted Thugs, And More In Our Bundy Ranch (Cattle) Roundup, Yeehaw!

  very definitely having a cow

Uh-oh. The sheeple are waking upThe Great Big Freedom to Never Pay Grazing Fees Revolution continues to bubble right along, although the Bureau of Land Management released Cliven Bundy’s cheerfully-trespassing cattle and has backed off from its plans to seize them. Still, there are rumblings in the Wingnuttosphere that this is far from over, because for one thing Bundy still owes the $1 million in unpaid grazing fees (we’ll assume that includes penalties & interest?) and also because it’s just too good a story, so militia loons are continuing to stay at the Bundy ranch and make noises about how the Federal Government has just gone too far by insisting that people who run cattle on federal land actually need to pay for that. Tyranny!

And patriotic citizens who can’t make it out to Nevada are also getting involved, like the sad online activist who tried to leave a comment here at yr mommyblog to promote his project to name & shame some jackbooted thugs, but discovered that Wonkette Does Not Allow Comments. And even though they had a really compelling message — “Help rat out Dirty Harry Reid’s minions! http://mercid.wordpress.com/ “ — we didn’t let them into the comments section, because we are liberal fascists. But we did look at their dumb blog, and it was so spectacularly bad that you need to see it.

See, the idea for “Mercenary ID” is that this activist is going to use the Power of Crowdsourcing to identify the “’hired guns’ (mercenary groups/individuals)” that the blogger is certain were hired by the Feds to “do the Elitist Government’s biddings” in the now semi-infamous videotaped confrontation between Bundy supporters and BLM officers (Or maybe they’re park rangers; we won’t claim to be experts on recognizing uniforms). And so our internet hero posts screenshots of several of the faces from the video, asking:

WHO ARE THESE GUYS? Help identify each of them. Chances are EXTREMELY high, these individuals are not your average, everyday BLM agent. All equipped with cool Oakley sunglasses, and freshly groomed facial hair, almost straight from the fields of Afghanistan. Who are these “contractors”?

They have to be mercenaries. Just have to be.

Our favorite is the last screenshot, of “FINAL NEGOTIATOR – AGENT X,” which sounds like a description of a boss battle from a videogame walkthrough.
also clearly a hired gun

We’re also impressed by the enlargement — you can almost hear the blogger saying “ENHANCE!”

There’s just one tiny problem with this exciting plan to crowdsource the outing of Harry Reid’s BLM Mercenaries: so far, the crowd hasn’t shown up to make wild guesses about the identities of four guys in a video. The site has exactly the one post on it, and exactly zero comments. It’s like one of those sad abandoned virtual storefronts in Second Life, still trying to convince you to fit out your avatar in an Ace Ventura costume. Still, it’s encouraging to see someone try to do something to replicate Reddit’s brilliant solving of the Boston Bombing — maybe one of these guys is the kid who’s suing Glenn Beck?

In other exciting Bundy Ranch Updates, Rand Paul has answered Harry Reid’s outrageous assertion that people can’t just violate the law with impunity with a big “Yeahbut,” saying in an interview,

“I think there’s an opposite thing to what Harry Reid said, and that’s that the federal government shouldn’t violate the law. Nor should we have 48 federal agencies carrying weapons and having SWAT teams.

So there! Guns are for militias, not for the federal agents that militias want to shoot at. Shooting back is tyranny.

Also, too, Rand’s dad, RON PAUL!!!!, is predicting that the Feds will eventually come back to arrest Bundy, despite the stunning temporary victory of the American People:

“I’m hoping this is a very positive of things to come, where the people stand up and object to the federal government’s intrusion into our lives and everything that we do,” Paul told Fox News. “And when the people do get together and stand up, if think the governments will be forced to back down. But the other thing is governments don’t give up their power easily and they may well come back with a lot more force, like they did at Waco with the Davidians.”

Yes, the American People don’t like laws being enforced, by golly, and they will stand with Cliven Bundy because he is only a scofflaw who doesn’t recognize the Federal Government, and not a border crosser who is trying to arrogantly defy the law.

And just to help ease tensions, Fox’s Sean Hannity has a chat with former Arizona sheriff (Hannity sez “Nevada,” but no) Richard Mack, he of the “put the women in front” plan; his “sources inside the Federal Government” say that a midnight raid is on the way. Sean also asks Bundy what he thinks would happen if the Feds come to arrest him, and Bundy, true to his “sovereign citizen” nonsense beliefs, insists that only the Clark County Sheriff has the authority to arrest him. Also, he’ll “deal with” Harry Reid’s army — so apparently Harry Reid is now running the BLM.

And of course, Hannity gives himself a big pat on the back for having helped to escalate the paranoid reaction. What a swell guy.

[Politico / Media Matters / CBS Las Vegas]

Follow Doktor Zoom on Twitter. He’d just like to remind our friends on the extreme right that federal office buildings contain daycare centers, okay?

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About the author

Doktor Zoom lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his pseudonym after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition).

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