You all remember how the Republicans made a big show after Nobummer’s re-election of learning that maybe putting all their eggs in the ‘angry white man’ basket might not work in modern America? That lasted about 2.8 seconds, until Republicans started, you know, being Republican.
But since the report that outlined that sincere push was released a year ago today, the RNC has put out a teevee advertisement proving that they can, indeed, find minorities and women to say they are Republican. Click on the video! Seriously, give it a watch! One guy even speaks Mexican, so we assume Rep. Steve King is checking his calves for illegal cantaloupes right this minute!
According to The Hill:
The ad, released as part of the one-year anniversary of a RNC report that said the party must diversify, features a slew of females and minority voters describing why they’re Republicans.
Well, ‘a slew’ might be going too far. The ad is only 30 seconds, and we counted 5 definite women and minorities, one hipster pumping gas who may be ironically gay or ironically Republican or unironically both, and one random white dude who only says, “I’m a Republican,” maybe to make the 99.96% of the Republican base feel more at home.
The policies mentioned are pretty bland. For some reason, “self-deportation” didn’t come up, and neither did trying to de-fund Planned Parenthood. Protecting every life gets a nod, though.
There was support for focusing education on children, which will come as a shock to Rep. Jan Schakowsky (D-IL). Everyone knows that Schakowsky has been the leading voice to create a Department of Feline Education, because YouTube has taught us that the kittens are our future. Clearly, Democrats have all the wrong priorities on education.
The guy who spoke Mexican wants religious freedom, which we assume means the freedom to worship whatever sacred tree, magic skygod, or talking sockpuppet that commands you to discriminate against the civil liberties of our LGBTQMORELETTERS brothers and sisters. Because the only way to get religious freedoms is to take them away from an oppressed group. That’s science, and it’s in the Bible somewhere.
There’s plenty more, but the Editrix did not provide us with enough booze to watch it more than once, so you are on your own.
But this isn’t like one of those ads that gets put on the internet and then never actually runs on teevee. Oh no — they are serious about reaching out to the media outlets that you ladies and minorities like to watch:
The six-figure ad buy is running in 14 states with Senate races, a relatively small buy spread out across the country. But it’s running on cable networks like Bravo and the Food Network that have heavily female audiences, as well as on TVOne, a network targeting African American audiences, and on some local affiliates of Telemundo.
Props to the RNC for making an effort. No, we are serious. This is a good thing. If the RNC tries at least a little to remind Republicans that both women and minorities (and even minority women) have the right to vote, perhaps:
- Fewer GOP men would write books about wives submitting to their husbands;
- There would be less of a need for classes on how to talk to women;
- Mike Huckabee would shut the hell up;
- Texas might be ok with letting minorities vote; and
- North Carolina might be ok with letting young people and minorities vote.
With nationwide spending on the 2014 midterm elections set to top $3.6 billion, we are glad to see the RNC spending a few hundred thousand dollars to remind us that they can, in fact, find literally one handful of women and minorities who are Republicans.
Follow DDM on Twitter (@Wonksplainer), because he loves women and minorities even when it’s not an election year.