No, Pope Not Actually Indicted For Child Trafficking, Crimes Against Humanity, Or Fishing Without A License

Those of you with excitable friends who are prone to forwarding stuff from the interwebs may want to keep this handy for debunking purposes: No, actually, Pope Francis hasn't been charged with child trafficking by an international court. (And neither was Queen Elizabeth. ) This completely serious claim apparently was considered reliable enough by some of Yr Editrix's Facebook pals -- specifically, her "DRONE OBAMAA WAR CRIMER" correspondents -- that they did link it all over the place, which suggests that a lot of people are more credulous than we'd like to believe or that Yr. Editrix needs to be choosier about accepting friend requests. But according to the breathless story at conspiracy clearinghouse Examiner.com, Pope Francis was

named as the chief defendant in a child trafficking case involving Catholic orphans. Pope Francis will be asked to defend his role in child trafficking during Argentine's 1970s Junta Dirty War. This case of orphaned children from missing political prisoners was set for trial on March 31 2014 in a Brussels international court.

Well, hey, Brussels is where they have both the EU headquarters and immediate access to punishment by sprouts, so that seems credible enough.

And there's even a secret witness, who has

agreed to come out of hiding in Spain to testify against Pope Francis. The Argentine civil servant took extensive notes of meetings between the now-Pope Francis and Junta military officials.

Man oh man, the Pope's crimes are going to catch up with him at last, probably maybe -- now let's see, what court is he being charged by?

The announcement today to take Pope Francis to trial was made by Kevin Annett of the International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State. It was done on the first anniversary of the 25 Feb. 2013 conviction of former Pope Benedict and 29 other global elites including Queen Elizabeth, for their Crimes Against Humanity.

Oh, yeah, we all remember when that happened. Say, Internet, can you tell us a little more about this here "International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State"? Looks like they have a website, which has exactly the kinds of graphics you'd expect for a distinguished international body:

It must be a reliable organization, seeing how frequently it's cited at sites like AboveTopSecret and Infowars. Let's see what the nice smartass skeptics at RationalWiki have to say about ITCCS:

The International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State (or ITCCS) is a one-man blog that pretends to be a tribunal established to enforce common law. Despite claims of being based in Brussels, the whole thing is written in Canada by Kevin D. Annett, a defrocked United Church of Canada priest.

The ITCCS came to some notice in the social media sphere in February 2013, when Annett issued a claim that Pope Benedict XVI resigned for fear of arrest on an ITCCS warrant [See Snopes on that -- Dok Z] and the hard of thinking forwarded it around as if this actually made sense.

Previously, Annett had made his money claiming to represent the interests of native Canadians. Until they told him to damn well stop it.

Oh. He sounds nice.

Still you have to admire just how industrious New Pope, Old Pope, and Old Queen were in their plot against children. In February, another Examiner piece explained that the three, along with "Canadian Prime Minister Brent Harper" [sic], had "prevent[ed] excavation of 31 child mass grave sites of the 50,000 missing Canadian indigent children case." Yes, we are nodding and smiling neutrally while backing slowly away now.

And how exactly does Mr. Annett conduct these important judicial proceedings? Just like the best American wingnuts -- with "People's Common-Law Courts" that appear to consist of Kevin D. Annett. RationalWiki notes that his loopy documents do a pretty good job of looking like they may have come from a real court, except until you start reading them and the waves of crazy wash over you:

Annett has "convicted" two consecutive Popes of genocide and child trafficking, issuing "international arrest warrants" for them.[8] He has also issued a proclamation dissolving Canada.  [link added -- Dok Z] 

And yet Canadians, in blatant disregard of the legal dissolution of their so-called nation, continue to steal America's hockey medals. Where, we ask you, is the justice in that?

Yr Wonkette will keep you updated on the status of New Pope's trial and inevitable guilty verdict in March, unless of course there's a really good "guy high on meth masturbates on an alligator" story out of Florida.

[ Examiner / Snopes / RationalWiki ]