Daily Caller Brings 'News' You Can Use: Most People Named 'Adolf' Are Democrats, Sorry, It's Science

Satiric Genius Patrick Howley has discovered a fun little web toy that tells you "the partisan affiliation of baby names." The widget, a bit of fluff from campaign analytics outfit "Clarity Labs," is pretty simple -- put in a first name and it will match the name to the number of registered voters and their party affiliation. And what do we learn from this exercise?

Fifty-five point five percent of the 1,559 registered voters named ‘Adolf’ are Democrats, compared to 48.5 percent who are Republicans ... “Fidel” clocked in at 72.8 percent Democrat, “Benito” at 72 percent, “Slobodan” at 61 percent, “Genghis” at 73 percent, “Vladimir” at 59.7 percent, “Idi” at 82 percent, and “Saddam” at 81.2 percent.

Your editrix has asked us to point out here that she thought she got pregnant in Havana once, but she did not, and so did not gift the world with the greatest baby name past present or future, "Fidel Schoenkopf-Takizawa." And now she is sad.

Not mentioned by Howley: 73.8% of voters named "Jesus" are just all right with being Democrats. And, perhaps related to that first result, Democrats have a firm hold (79.5%) on the first name "Godwin."

A few more surprising results:

• While a majority of those named "Ronald" are indeed Republicans, it's only 53% to 47%.

• There are only 63 registered voters named "Mitt." 56.4% of them are Democrats anyway.

• There are way more Democrats named "Sarah" (54.4% of 806,471) than "Hillary" (54.9% of 27,919).

• "Karl" is not a very Marxist name (53% Republican) though "Groucho" is (65% Dem, out of 10 voters -- huh?)

• "Cletus" is a narrowly more-Republican name (51.9%), as are "Skeeter" (52.%) and "Bubba" (54.4%).

• "Tucker" is about as Republican as you'd expect: 55%

• "Dwight" is more Democratic somehow (54.4%), even though any kids named after the character on The Office have yet to reach voting age.

• Wonkette is full of Democratic names -- "Rebecca" (a squeaker at 50.9% D to 49.1% R), "Lisa" (53.1%), and "Alex" (58.6%). Our one outlier is "Gary," who will be severely chastised for having a Republican name (55.9% R). Also, Yr Doktor Zoom is clearly schizoid depending on whether you go with his given name (54.4% Dem) or the name he uses in Real Life (53.7% Rep). Our other pseudonymous regulars, DDM and Major Major Major Major, have solidly middle-of the road first names that are both almost equally used by both parties.

• "God" is a Democrat -- 86% of the time (out of 21 registered voters.)

• "Reince" isn't even in the database.

[ Clarity Campaigns via Daily Caller via tip from "Adolf" Chascates]