Civil Rights Legend Ted Yoho Vows To Honor MLK And Rosa Parks By Killing Obamacare

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Ted Yoho, more or less

Rep. Ted Yoho (R-Duh) is turning out to be the great civil rights leader of our generation. He is stalwart in his freedom-fighting against the reverse racism of Obamacare, argle bargling truth to power, standing up for the rights of the Taxed Enough AlreadyTM melatonin-deficient. And do you know why? No, it is not because he is a typical Republican who hates that Kenyan-born usurper-in-chief O’Lame-o. (Well, okay, that is why, actually, but he can’t just say that, that would sound crazy!)

“It only takes one with passion — look at Rosa Parks, Lech Walesa, Martin Luther King,” said Representative Ted Yoho of Florida [...] People with passion that speak up, they’ll have people follow them because they believe the same way, and smart leadership listens to that.”

Ah, right. While Rosa Parks is mostly known for that time she was all, “Actually, no, I’m good sitting right here in this seat on this bus,” what you may not realize — and that is why large animal vet and noted historian Yoho is here to ‘splain — is that the real passion of her life was trying to ensure that no one had access to affordable health care. Also too that Republican Martin Luther King Jr., who so would have wanted racist Obama to stop talking racistly about race like a racist already Jesus Christ! And also too that great Tea Party union-buster Lech Walesa.

Of course, not all Republicans want to defund Obamacare by any means necessary — but that is mostly because they are abusive bullies who do not have balls as big as Wendy Davis. (Note: No one does.) But Weeper of the House John Boehner says that’s the kind of diversity that makes Republicans so great:

“We’ve got a diverse caucus, frankly,” Mr. Boehner said, when asked at a news conference Thursday who, exactly, was running his conference. “Republicans, by their very nature, are a bit more independent than our colleagues across the aisle.”

Yes, we often marvel at the diversity of the Republican Party: angry white men who are crazy and angry white men who are even more crazy. It’s like a Benetton ad!

Anyyoho, today House Republicans (plus two naughty Democrats who need to go sit in a corner and wear their dunce caps) bravely voted to defund Obamacare right in the face — AGAIN — and this time it will probably work because everyone knows the 42nd time is the charm. Any great civil rights leader for whitey will tell you that.

[NYT]

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