Liz Cheney Is Your New Winston Churchill, Will Stop Obamacare From Annexing The Sudetenland

  why not take a local newspaper quail hunting?

Fully expects to have many inspiring quotes falsely attributed to herIn a speech to a crowd of 150 Tea Party supporters Tuesday, senate candidate Liz Cheney said she did not support airstrikes on Syria because President Obama has not adequately defined goals for the potential intervention, and because she believes Obama should have supported Syrian rebels before anti-Assad forces included “Islamist radicals.” This is an interesting change from two years ago, when most rightwing opponents of aid to Syrian rebels warned against arming Islamist radicals.

The Jackson Hole News&Guide (that’s their in-house spacing) also reports that Cheney

filled her 90-minute speech and question-and-answer session with red meat for the conservative crowd. She compared herself to Winston Churchill standing up to Adolph Hitler and suggested members of both parties in Congress are hiding information about Obamacare from the public. She wrote off the entire newspaper industry, but more specifically the Jackson Hole News&Guide.

We are sort of wondering what Winston Churchill would have thought about not bombing anyone, as he was reportedly rather fond of the practice.

Cheney asserted that the delay in implementation of the Affordable Care act’s mandate for some employers violates the U.S. Constitution somehow, and also claimed that Congress cut a “secret” deal to use taxpayer funds to subsidize congressional staffers’ enrollment in the federal healthcare exchanges (this secret has been hushed up so effectively that it is a major talking point for every Republican running this year).

Cheney also attacked the Jackson Hole News&Guide for its role in publicizing a recent story about her purchase of a “resident” fishing license which she did not qualify for, because she has not yet lived in the state for a full year. This is apparently something that some Wyomingans see as a big deal, although Cheney blamed the fuck-tussle on “media outlets in the valley that are not fair and balanced,” adding that

“Newspapers are dying, and that’s not a bad thing,” she said. “We’re not depending on the Jackson Hole News&Guide to get the news out. We’re depending on ourselves. We’re going to go over their heads.”

Cheney’s declaration of war on Obamacare and on the News&Guide (but not Syria, who can shoot back) was apparently well-received by the fair and balanced members of the crowd:

Cheney urged supporters to talk to 10 of their friends about her, rather than reading the newspaper. A member of the crowd singled out where a News&Guide reporter was sitting.

After Cheney’s remarks, three attendees declined to be interviewed for this story.

Liz Cheney will keep America safe from the tyranny of health care and a small-town newspaper. Can Senator Mike Enzi make the same pledge?

[Jackson Hole News&Guide]

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About the author

Doktor Zoom lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his pseudonym after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition).

View all articles by Doktor Zoom

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