seven words you can't say in the situation room

Hillary Clinton Channels Wonkette On Value Of White House Correspondents’ Dinner

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Such language!HuffPo has a real Hillary Shocker today, kids! No not THAT kind, you filthy pervs — just a little story about a minor detail revealed in a new Washington-insidery book, Mark Leibovich’s This Town. It must be Washington Insider Book Week or something. Anyway, here is the Big Reveal: Hillary said a swear in the run-up to the raid that killed Osama bin Laden! How unbecoming!

When an unidentified national security person wondered whether the press might become suspicious if President Barack Obama didn’t attend the relentlessly White House Correspondents’ Dinner, Clinton dismissed the question, saying “[Expletive] the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.” As it turned out, the timing was fine, and Barry had time to listen to and perform some bad comedy, to take credit for the extrajudicial killing of one sworn enemy of the United States, and to preempt the dumb reality show of another.

We are still wondering, though, what that expletive was. “Fuck” makes the most sense, but as the Huffpo piece — and every other report we’ve seen on this — so delicately puts it, “Clinton has long been rumored to be a fan of profanity,” so maybe it was something more exotic, like “Cockholster the White House Correspondents’ Dinner” or “Doublefuck the White House Correspondents’ Dinner” or maybe even an embarrassingly inept swear like “Rectally Cuntify the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.” We will never know for sure.

And [expletive] those pussy online sites for not just saying “fuck.”


About the author

Doktor Zoom Is the pseudonym of Marty Kelley, who lives in Boise, Idaho. He acquired his nym from a fan of Silver-Age comics after being differently punctual to too many meetings. He is not a medical doctor, although he has a real PhD (in Rhetoric and Composition).

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