In what is bound to be the most exciting counterdemonstration since that one time you heckled Brother Jed when he came to your college (only far less fun), some strange wingnut group has announced that it will hold a big ex-gay rally at the end of this month in Washington DC. So far, only the organizers themselves are confirmed as attending, although they have invited some big names that they are totally sure will show up, like Michele Bachmann and Jim DeMint. And OK, maybe “rally” is the exactly wrong word, since it’s DC at the end of July, and the only event that’s actually been announced is a dinner and reception (pdf link) at the Family Research Council, which is coming off its hugely successful “call2fall” prayer thing that rescued America yesterday, if you didn’t notice. But still, it’ll be epic, maybe!
The whole sad ball of fail is being organized by Christopher Doyle, co-founder of months-old website “Voice of the Voiceless,” which if you think about it is kind of presumptuous, maybe, but never mind that, because he wants you all to know that even if Exodus International threw in the rainbow-print towel because gay people tend to remain, you know, gay people, that’s no good reason to stop trying! In a press release to FRC website OneNewsNow, Doyle announced:
“What we’re going to be doing is former homosexuals, persons with unwanted same-sex attractions and their families and allies are going to be convening on Washington, D.C. on July 31st to send a clear message to the members of Congress that ex-gays are alive; we do exist … There are tens of thousands of us, and we want to be counted.”
You can bet that we will be happy to count the attendees, too! Doyle also has some good old-fashioned whining about how June’s Pride festivities unaccountably left out the ex-gays:
“We are tired of the gay activist lobby discriminating [against] us, marginalizing us and taking away our rights, and we’re now fighting back, and we’re demanding that if gays are going to get full diversity and equality in America, we also demand that ex-gay voices be heard as well.”
But what about the never-nudes? Where are their voices, Mr. Doyle?
RightWingWatch notes that while the OneNewsNow piece says that Bachmann, DeMint, and Rep. Tim Huelskamp are “scheduled speakers,” the invitation says only that they have been “invited,” while the only “confirmed” speakers are Doyle and “fellow ex-gay activists DL Foster, who has said Dan Savage should be arrested, and Greg Quinlan, who claims gay people practise “sexual cannibalism.” We guess that explains the listing for “long pig” on the menu.
Frankly, we are having a hard time getting excited about Ex-Gay Pride Month, seeing as how July is also National Hot Dog Month, which is the sort of confluence you’d think these folks would have given some thought to. Still, we can at least suggest where they can get a nifty animated logo (from Wonkette Operative “Humorously_Joe”).