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Nikki HaleyOh Southern Dems. First you shoot your own fool faces off by being SUPER FUCKING RACIST about Mitch McConnell’s Taiwan-born wife, Elaine Chao, who’s enough of an asshole that you DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE TO BRING HER ASIANNESS INTO IT.

Well, now the chair of the South Carolina Democratic Party has said an idiot SUPER FUCKING RACIST thing about Governor Nikki Haley. At the Jefferson/Jackson Dinner. Because if you are going to say shitty SUPER FUCKING RACIST things, it should definitely be at the dinner named for the dude who impregnated his slave and the other dude who killed all the Indians, and then, when Supreme Court Chief Justice* John Marshall told him to stop killing all the Indians, invented the awesome catchphrase “YOU AND WHAT ARMY.”

Anyway, now he is lying about it.

South Carolina Democratic Party Chairman Dick Harpootlian on Tuesday again defended controversial comments he made about Nikki Haley (R) — he told Jefferson-Jackson dinner attendees last week that she should go back “to wherever the hell she came from” — by claiming he was referring to Haley’s past occupation as an accountant.

“I apologized yesterday if anyone inferred — I’m the grandson of immigrants,” Harpootlian said Tuesday on MSNBC. “She’s not from India. … She’s from Bamberg, South Carolina, where she was an accountant in her parents’ clothing store called Exotica. All I’m suggesting is she needs to go back to being an accountant in a dress store rather than being this fraud of a governor that we have.”

Sure, Mr. “Harpootlian,” which is such a totally American name, and we are sure you are not at all Elvish. WHY DON’T YOU GO BACK TO RIVENDELL WITH YOUR FELLOW ELVES, DOK, HAPPY, GRUMPY, UPPITY, ARROGANT AND ELROND?

Anyway, why won’t anyone believe poor Elvish Dick? Oh right, because that is a ridiculous lie, and hardly anybody is actually that stupid.

*And your editrix’s great great great something grand papa!

[TPM]

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