Hey remember that one movie, with the dudes, but they are straight, but they gay marry each other? It looked like it was going to be 90 minutes of gay-panic jokes, but then it was surprisingly sweet, if we recall correctly since we probably watched it on cold medicine because there is no way we would have watched it sober. Well! The chair of the Georgia Republican Party, one Miz Sue Everhart, is terribly terribly worried that if we let gay people get married, straight dudes will enter sham marriages for the health insurance. Because that is a thing. That people worry about. For some reason, we guess. It is nice to see that shitty Adam Sandler movies are influencing this important policy debate.
Tell us some things with your mouth, Miz Everhart!
“You may be as straight as an arrow, and you may have a friend that is as straight as an arrow,” Everhart said. “Say you had a great job with the government where you had this wonderful health plan. I mean, what would prohibit you from saying that you’re gay, and y’all get married and still live as separate, but you get all the benefits? I just see so much abuse in this it’s unreal. I believe a husband and a wife should be a man and a woman, the benefits should be for a man and a woman. There is no way that this is about equality. To me, it’s all about a free ride.”
‘But wait!’ you are thinking, with your “brains,” even though we’ve told you to stop that. ‘What is to stop opposite-marriage people from having sham marriages for health insurance?’ OH RIGHT NOTHING.
Could there be any other reason Miz Everhart does not wanta the gay marriage?
“Lord, I’m going to get in trouble over this, but it is not natural for two women or two men to be married,” Everhart said. “If it was natural, they would have the equipment to have a sexual relationship.”
The wang goes in the muffin, everyone, and that’s all Sue Everhart has to say about that.