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Oily taintThis post brought to you by the auspices of the Patty Dumpling Endowed Chair for Oil-Spill Blogging. Attention, Wonkrinis! The Beehive State is throwing an Earth Day poster contest, with the very excellent theme of “Where Would WE Be Without Oil, Gas & Mining?” and we know ever so many of you would like to join! Let us read the mission statement, together!

•To improve students’ and the public’s awareness of the important role that oil, gas, and mining
play in our everyday lives.
• To highlight how modern mining and petroleum extraction techniques and reclamation
methods minimize environmental impacts while providing society with the raw materials
required to have our high standard of living.
• To allow teachers to combine natural resources, science, and social studies education with
individual creativity and artistic skill for an activity that meets several learning objectives in the
science and social studies curricula.

Cool Earth Day project, Utah! We will enter you now!

First, we must look at the Rules:

• Include the theme “Where Would WE Be Without Oil, Gas & Mining?” in the poster design. The theme
must be spelled correctly and stand out clearly from the background. Letters drawn in a color similar to
the background color cannot be easily read and can disqualify a poster from the contest.
• Artwork should be created using a color medium such as paint, crayons, markers, colored pencil,
computer art and/or pen and ink. Avoid media likely to smudge or smear, such as pastels, chalk or
charcoal. Collages are welcome, but keep in mind that the poster must be flat in order to be scanned
for reproduction. Only hand lettering will be accepted. DO NOT USE GLITTER. Reproducibility of the
poster will be a factor in the judges’ decisions, so use good lettering, high contrast and bright colors!
The Division reserves the right to enhance artwork for better print results.
• The entry should focus on where we would be without the materials that come from the earth: oil, gas,
& mined minerals. Some ideas include:
o Coal, oil, and natural gas provide most of the energy we use (cars, heat, electricity, light etc.)
o We use mined materials and petroleum products every day – gasoline, cars, computers,
skateboards, home-building materials, etc.
• Students are encouraged to discuss the project with their parents/guardians. Students should choose
their own artwork content with suggestions from parents/guardians or teachers.

No glitter? FUCK YOU UTAH. Oh, also we have to be a Utah K-6 student? Huh.

Well, we guess we will not actually enter Utah’s contest, unless one of you poor people lives there, has a kid, and wants to endanger her immortal soul by letting her be a front for Wonk Photoshop Laundering. But YOU can still enter here!

Send your artworks (NO GLITTER ALL THE GLITTER) to tips@wonkette.com, subject line “BUTT MINING.” Send them fast! We are Americans, and as such, we do not like to wait. Winners will be announced at a time that occurs in the future.

[Utah via Wonket operative “Dick”]

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