let's party!

Long National Nightmare Over: Jailbird Scooter Libby’s Voting Rights Restored!

hey guys!It was a dark day in America when Cheney henchman Scooter Libby got convicted and imprisoned by Barack Nobama’s tyrannical army (and its Time Machine). A dark day indeed when you criminalize “politics,” wherein “politics” is defined as “blowing the cover of a CIA person just to make some un-understandable point about … well, we never could figure out what the point of outing Valerie Plame was supposed to be. That her husband was a pussy or something? It really didn’t make much sense.”

Luckily, a new day has arrived, and Ol’ Scooty there has now had all his rights restored to him, including voting! Because Republicans are very much into allowing felons who have served their debt to society to vote and stuff, as long as those felons are Scooter Libby.

In fact, Republicans are soooo into restoring suffrage to convicted felons that they hardly ever disenfranchise people just for having names that aren’t even the same as those convicted felons! Oh ho ho, and they also hardly ever disenfranchise convicted felons who aren’t actually convicted felons anyway! Goddamn we miss Katherine Harris. That lady was a walking Good Times party all by herself! But at least other secretaries of state are keeping the dream alive!

Anyway, congratulations Scooter Libby! As good liberals, we are for people regaining the rights and responsibilities of society after they have done their time. Even you, we guess, whatever.


About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf
What Others Are Reading


Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here with a few helpful links to ease your transition to Disqus - Claiming Old Accounts - Claiming Your ID Comments - Turning off Disqus Notifications. And, as always, remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!