Jerb-Killing regulation

Banks Will Now Review Themselves to Find Out if They Did Your Foreclosure Right

dress like a homeless person for fun and profit! Well this will save everyone a lot of time! Banks are just going to go ahead and do a rigorous self-review to see if they handled foreclosures correctly. Of course, most of them have not handled foreclosures correctly, remember when Wells Fargo foreclosed on the wrong house? Twice? And remember when Bank of America did the same thing? (In fairness, BofA only did it once, not twice, so let’s have a round of applause for Bank of America!) How about the time Citi-Residential auctioned off the wrong house at a foreclosure sale? We pretty much have just four main banks in the U.S. now, and JP Morgan doesn’t do much retail banking, so in sum: three out of three major banks have screwed up on handling foreclosures. Good job America! USA! USA!

Anyway, a bunch of very smart people put their heads together and decided that the best way to handle this was to 1) start a fake task force that is supposed to investigate mortgage fraud, but in reality, does nothing, and 2) let banks review themselves because it would just be more efficient that way.

Washington is seeking help from an unlikely group in its effort to distribute billions of dollars to struggling homeowners in foreclosure: the same banks accused of abusing homeowners with shoddy foreclosure practices.

In doing so, the regulators are trying to speed the process after a flawed, independent foreclosure review delayed relief for millions of borrowers, according to people briefed on the matter. But housing advocates worry that the banks, eager to end the costly process, could take shortcuts as they comb through loan files for potential errors, in some cases diverting aid from the neediest homeowners.

Stupid “housing advocates,” there is nothing to worry about. It is much better for Freedom if banks just kind of manage themselves, particular when the alternative is un-elected bureaucrats and job-killing regulations, duh. Anyway, don’t you feel better? Soon the banks will review themselves and assure us of the wonderful job they have been doing, and we can all breathe a sigh of relief!

Now, some consultants feel spurned by the regulators’ decision to hand off the review.

“Why did you not trust the banks a month ago?” asked one consultant who spoke anonymously for fear of offending regulators. “And why do you solely rely on them now?”

Good question, Commie! We’re sure you’ll get an explanation in no time!

[NY Times]

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About the author

Kris E. Benson writes about politics for Wonkette and is pursuing a doctorate in philosophy. This will come in handy for when they finally open that philosophy factory in the next town over. @Kris_E_Benson

View all articles by Kris E. Benson

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