What A Star We Lost When Barack Obama Beat Alan Keyes

  the culling

Alan Keyes is not your average man. For one thing, he is probably clinically insane. For another, we will never, ever forget — we will be 108 years old, on our deathbed, laughing and cackling — the South Carolina GOP primary debate when Alan Keyes shouted and yelled that the question “what is your biggest regret” (WHICH WAS ASKED OF EVERY CANDIDATE) was “racist.” Why would anyone assume he had ever done anything wrong? IS IT BECAUSE HE IS BLACK?

Well, yes. Obviously!

But what about that alternate timeline where Alan Keyes beats that upstart Barack Obama in the Illinois Senate election, and goes on to become President of the United States? What then?

Well, we would not be grabbing everyone’s weapons so we can “cull them,” that is for sure, because Alan Keyes is simply not going to stand for it!

Also, we would be governed by a clinically insane person, so that might have had its downsides.

[PoliticalWire]

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Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

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