Jesus: Don't Let Your Daughters Go To College To Turn Into Ugly Feminist Whores

We are sure these Christian radio hosts were not trying to gift us with the joy of laughter, the heartiest, most cleansing laughs we have had in weeks. We believe they are quite serious, as they prove without a doubt the link between letting your daughter go to college and her ugly feminist professors turning her into a family-destroying, child-hating, ugly, angry feminist whore. In fact, if they could see us, sitting at our monitor, drinking our fair-trade shade-grown organic French roast coffee in our Stylish Urban Loft Of Destroying the Family and Whoring, and they could see ourhappy, beamingVERY ANGRY face, they would probably get even angrier than they are now, and that is really saying something. Give them just shy of five minutes of your time. You'll be sogladMAD you did!

Here are a few choice quotes from our compatriots at Right Wing Watch, transcribing so the rest of us can ctrl-c/ctrl-v.

Kevin Swanson: Now remember, the goal is that these women have to be independent. The goal is lots and lots of birth control. The goal is lots and lots and lots of fornication. The goal is abortion. The day-after pill will help. And it will help a lot. Remember, the goal is to get that girl a job because she needs no stinkin’ husband, she’s got the fascist corporation and government-mandated insurance programs and socialist welfare that will take care of her womb to tomb. Who needs a cotton-pickin’ husband? Who needs a family? That’s pretty much the worldview that’s dominating, my friends. That’s what the college is all about.

Dave Buehner: Because her feminist professors have told her her husband will abuse her, she will be like a slave to him. Instead she will just go to the slave market and sell herself, at least sell her body, to the highest bidder. See, that’s much, much better!

Feminists! Always teaching young girls to sell their bodies for cash. But are some feminists good feminists? Well, maybe. There is the Sarah Palin kind of feminist, who is pretty! And wants a husband! But maybe she doesn't want to "submit" to him, so maybe that is bad too? We cannot really parse their point, whether Palin is a good witch or a bad witch.

Buehner: Actually, you’re talking about perhaps even a third stream of feminism. There’s the Sarah Palin kind of feminism that wants to have a husband, just not one to submit to. And she still wants to...

Buehner: Right, there are two forms of feminism, and it actually has to do with a division of how attractive a woman is. So, you have the group that is very attractive, they’re in the sororities, they’re gonna be in the beauty contests. They’re actually going to get the good jobs. They’re going to leverage their attractiveness in the marketplace because it has a market value. Marketing. It helps market who you are. They’re going to proceed, now they will probably some of them become the Sarah Palin-style feminists, they’ll get themselves a husband, but they’ll never be dependent on the husband, they’ll never submit to the husband, in fact they will use their power probably to make their husband submit to them.

Swanson: Okay, so you have the cute feminists.

Buehner: Right, you have the good-looking ones.

Swanson: Well, who are the others?

Buehner: Well, the other ones are those who we should say are, um, attractive-deficient. And they have not been…

Swanson: That’s nicely put. Attractively challenged.

Buehner: Attractively challenged. Optically challenged. These are the kinds that will look for careers mostly likely in academia.

Swanson: Now, just to say, they’re ugly. They’re the feminazis that Rush Limbaugh likes to refer to.

Buehner: Right, right, and they’re generally very angry about it because their attractive…or their lack of attractiveness has not given them access to power that they wanted in the marketplace. So they can get jobs…

Swanson: And they’re certainly not going to get a lot of power sexually.

Buehner: No, but they can get jobs in the government bureaucracy, they can work as an FDA administrator, or you can actually run the EPA if you want, or academia. Academia’s actually the best place because you can be angry, ugly and you can also get tenure. It’s great, it’s the big trifecta.

Swanson: You’re gonna make some people mad about what you’ve just said. There will be some very angry feminists.

Buehner: You mean there will be angrier angry feminists.

Ha, that was kind of a good one! Good job, you guys!

Swanson: Angrier angry feminists are gonna come at you for what you just said, and probably from our listening audience, because if we tick anybody off we’re ticking two different folks off, the feminists and the homosexuals, they can’t stand this kind of stuff.

Buehner: Neither one of them have a high regard for the family or for the Word of God.

Swanson: That’s true, yeah, you’re right, you’re right, you’re right. And they’re the ones who are destroying society.

Well, duh, obviously. Homosexuals and feminists are always out to destroy society. Everybody knows that!

Buehner: I believe history will go back to this period of time and will look at feminism and say there was a time in which women lost the love of their children. They no longer cared about having children, they no longer loved their children, they no longer loved their husbands, where for all of history women very much cared about protecting the family. Now they only cared about themselves. They were riled up into a froth about how they were victims of society, patriarchal society, and they decided to become selfish, narcissistic, family-destroying whores.

You know, it was all just a fun time, a good time, laughing at ugly angrier angry feminists, until the child-hating ugly angrier angry feminists forced Buehner to get worked up into a froth about their selfish, narcissistic, family-destroying whoredom. Why do these angrier angry feminists insist on making this Christian radio host so angry?

[ RightWingWatch ]